varlaine

życie jako sen wariata śniony nieprzytomnie

[sapphicweisz]

[urbanalligatorliving]

[soureall-deactivated20250206]

Daddy issues?

nah, whole family issues

[becherdireinen]

Intimacy isn’t just experienced through sex. It’s crying together. It’s whispering late at night. It’s talking about growing up and what used to scare you. It’s going places that remind you of your childhood. It’s feeling each other without touching. It’s exchanging energy.

[2020knives]

autism thing where i have to watch youtubers i generally agree with react to every drama or apology ever (multiple sources) because someone can make the worst, most manipulative and dishonest apology video, and i will watch it and go "yeah okay :3"

i just cannot detect it like at all. i will not notice anything is wrong. & then the youtuber reacting is like "look how awful that was look at all of these bad things they did in it" and every time i'm like holy shit man you're so right actually i did not see

have to be super careful about where i get my news bc i know i'm so easily influenced bc i miss out on this stuff. & i'm tired of ppl talking down on people who don't pick up on this on their own. it's not my fault. i try to educate myself by watching other ppl talk about it but if i make a mistake please just educate me don't assume i'm evil?

[talesofanautisticwoman]

Sometimes i can't help but wonder, how it would be like if i was neurotypical. How would i be different comparing to how i am now and how would my life be different? Since autism is a huge part of me and impacts my everyday life.... i just wonder sometimes. I actually think about this a lot.

Like would i have more friends?

Will bonding with other people be easier? And would i get more along with my peers?

Would i be less akward?

Wondering how my personality will differ (if it does?)

These are some of the things i have been thinking about.. wondering how my life would have turned out differently.

[the-delta-quadrant-deactivated2]

*disables your periodic table*

flags: disabled, autistic, adhd/kinetic cognitive style, neurodivergent, mad, hard of sight

[sa-dnesss]

[sa-dnesss]

“It’s my birthday and all I can think about is killing myself”

—

[sa-dnesss]

“I am used to be alone. However, it weighs heavy sometimes.”

—

[sa-dnesss]

[sa-dnesss]

“Being suicidal and living for others is the most drowning feeling ever”

— Why can’t I find a reason to live for myself?

[sa-dnesss]

“I laugh when I talk about fucked up stuff that happened to me because showing emotion makes me want to tear my skin off”

—

[sa-dnesss]

What’s the point of being alive? All you are supposed to do is work until you die, if you are lucky and I mean if you are fucking lucky, you will get a couple weeks off work a year. Is this supposed to be the thing making life so precious? All the stress, disappointment, responsibilities, hopelessness and pain for a few days off? If that’s what life is going to be for the next 50 years, I would rather be dead than live it.

[sa-dnesss]

“Seeing my scars fade makes my brain think I need to do it again.”

—

[sa-dnesss]

“I could be doing “fine” but as soon as a small inconvenience happens, I am right back at the suicidal tendencies because I realise how much life sucks and how useless I am.”

—

[sa-dnesss]

“I do not like who I am. There is nothing good about me anymore. I am sick of wasting my time. I am worn out, I am really tired.”

— there is no point of me being here if I am not doing anything useful