TW: Discussion of rape accusations.
[For the love of God read this all the way through.]
I'm going to speak to you guys from the perspective of someone who has been sexually assaulted. Who did not accept that's what happened to me until roughly a year after it happened. Who made excuses and downplayed what me abuser did to me. Who likely wouldn't have gone to the police about the incident even if I had the motivation to do so directly after it happened-- by just, not being able to handle the way I know they would have treated me. Someone who was a profoundly imperfect victim, who accidentally basically did EVERYTHING wrong to make myself look as untrustworthy as possible to anyone who didn't know me or visibly witness the full context of everything that happened, and thought for two seconds more about the series of events that took placd. An element of our relationship, my abuser actively weaponized against me among our peers. I am a person with first-hamd experience of the optics not being on my side. Of someone who DID have evidence of at least SOMETHING not okay doing down between us at least, though no definitive proof of the details-- that I was terrified to actually show anyone, because as guilty as it made my abuser look, it also made me look as pathetic and small and as easily manipulated as I felt.
Of being someone not actually entirely certain if I was full on raped or not until YEARS later-- only because my abuser kinda sorta half admitted to it? Not that they said, "oh I raped [Liquid] and it was high-key a bop." But that they admitted sex occurred between us, which they characterized as consensual-- while I know it wasn't. Because I was all the way black out drunk and woke up in media res.
That it MIGHT have even happened more than once-- but that they consistently only did so when I was too high or drunk to really know, and I have absolutely nothing for any other time something might have went down. So. I just have to eat that L. Booboo I'm the fool.
I know EXACTLY what that kind of soul obliterating experience that is. I even know what having this experience litigated in the court of public opinion is like-- though not online, which is probably ten times worse. Don't fucking come at me with any sort of, "oh police bad, justice system broken, victims should come out, scream out until they wake heaven itself with their plight, you're not being empathetic, you're not supporting the girlies."
Yes I am. What I am about to say is more empathetic and helpful to victims then you uncritically cropdusting the entire internet with allegations with your key citation being a fucking vibe check.
The reality is, any kind of recourse against a perpetrator is going to be profoundly taxing on the victim. All options kind of fucking suck. That is as horrible as it sounds, but that doesn't change that it's just fucking true.
Which means, what recourse is taken HAS TO BE a cost-benifit analysis.
What's the fucking goal? What is the best and worst outcome for any action taken to attempt to help the victim? What is the potential harm or benifit if information is withheld from the public if the alleged perpetrator is a public figure until things can be thoroughly teased out? What is absolutely nessesary to keep this victim safe, and stop any future harm for other potential victims?
All victims should be taken seriously. All victims should be heard out. All victims have the right to seek out support. That support could include but is not limited to: providing emotional support, getting them in contact for resources to get professional help, contacting the police, contacting an organization designed to help victims, and/or making the public aware of the allegations. In the order of escalation that makes the most sense.
I can tell you with absolute fucking certainty making a fucking tone deaf meme nightmare hell nuclear holocaust of a callout video that tosses in a "trust me bro" rape allegation an already mostly complete tea-sesh, and then telling the alleged victim to "go 2 da popo okie uwu? key bayyyyyyyyyy." Is the fucking opposite of supporting a victim. At BEST you are setting a victim up to get dicked over on two fronts, and at WORST, you're causing a witchhunt. You are adding to the fire of actual victims who aren't blessed with a sexual assault story that "plays well" to public perception. ESPECIALLY, if you have a very public petty vendetta against the accused. I am utterly gobsmacked, the degree of selfishness required to not realize how that fucking looks-- even if you believe the allegations are true.
I typically hold my tongue now in instances of of rape and sexual assault allegations until the dust has thoroughly settled. As a sexual assault survivor myself, I have a hard time uncoupling my own feelings and experiences from instances of this happening-- and it's just better for me to recuse myself from adding to the chorus until I have all possible available information-- and even then.
And if I'm being totally honest, I found out first about this video first as KP stealing an asset from me in the pettiest way she possibly could have, and it was something of a slow car-crash what the video was actually about.
Blessing in disguise she went out of her way not to credit me, it turns out. So no one could really realistically make the mistake I was involved or associated with this video. But, to be honest, it does sting a little. Even an inconsequential, stupid little asset being nabbed and used like that-- it doesn't feel good. I try to engage with this sort of thing on my own terms-- and that option was taken away from me because of KP's bullshit.
It's not really about me. But I would have probably waited to say something if I knew what the subject matter of the video was initially. Or maybe not, I'm not sure.
I'm not going to know now, the choice was taken from me. I wasn't expecting my stupid fucking Lily puppet LIKE THAT, you know?
I'm going to ask that this post not be taken as me making any sort of definitive judgement on the Saberspark allegations. I might say something when it seems all the information is out, I might not. If I feel like I have something of value to add I will, but I'm not Judge Liquid over here-- ultimate decider of guilt.
This post is directed at ILoveKimPossibleALot, Courtney Peet, Brony Fandont and anyone else I think deserved to take some of the blame for this clusterfuck.
I have been for some amount of time been made privy of semi-private information that, though definitely proves nothing, implies some involved parties are, for SOME REASON, not willing to fully stand behind the legitimacy of the allegations when backed into a corner. I don't know if any of these parties have more information than has been made public, but it kind of seems like they MIGHT.
And that I have seen some red flags, that, in my VERY SUBJECTIVE interpretation of events, suggest that potentially KP in tentionally or otherwise, took advantage of a person very vulnerable to suggestion to massage a more substantial accusation out of a half-truth. That does happen. Especially with an alleged victim that is mentally ill, they can be pressured into exaggerating an event that emotionally affected them by creating a narrative that matches the intensity of their feelings.
That is ->NOT<- cause to doubt victims with mental illnesses. But that DOES mean victims need to be handled with care. That DOES mean it is natural human behavior to say what they have to socially protect ourselves. And if you, say, had an awkward personal interaction with an internet personality you developed a strong parasocial infatuation with as a child you never really properly processed. And, years later, when the memory was good and deep fried in your head, you were, say, directed to a youtuber who had all the ulterior motive in the world to press you into making it worth her while to give you the time of day. . .
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