two brothers take up arms to avenge their father's death. one brother finds himself bartering for assistance in exchange for an arranged marriage with a woman who seems to be angry that he exists. the other befriends a woman with whom he can't feasibly be but whom he can't seem to get away from nonetheless. while they can win a war, it appears they cannot avoid that most diabolical and dangerous of fates: falling in love.
OR, a game of thrones au (not canon compliant), where the red wedding never happened, there is a new king in the north, and each of the stark park men falls in love with their own y/n. (note from ry: since i will be going pretty far from canon, no deep knowledge of game of thrones is needed to enjoy this work)
two multi-chapter, parallel x reader fics. you can read both, or pick which y/n you want to be. see below the cut to choose your fate.
the reader characters:
lady ryger (x jay) - you are the youngest daughter of the lord of the small house ryger of willow wood. often ignored in the wake of your older siblings lives, you find ways to entertain yourself in town with the commoners. after war comes and goes in your lands, you are swept away with it when your father offers you as a token of loyalty to the new royal family in the north.
tropes: strangers to lovers, kinda forbidden love, fluff with mild angst, pining, falling in love together
chapter list
lady frey (x sunghoon) - an arranged marriage to the new king in the north turns your life upside down, and you're furious about it. while you've been wanting to escape house frey all your life, you never wanted to gain your freedom like this. it almost makes it worse the your new husband, impossibly handsome and entirely intolerable to you, seems to be trying so hard to make it work.
tropes: more tense strangers to lovers, arranged marriage, forced proximity, fluff with medium angst, frustrated pining, he falls first
chapter list
synopsis: you were never one to take the high road... until you met someone who made your body burn like rubber on asphalt.
street racer! hoon x street racer!maneater! reader
wc: 16.9k holy fuck honestly this hoe might be a 3-parter lowk
a/n: hi sorry i disappeared... but enjoy LOL and happy one year to my blog! i met so many cool people over this past year. reblogs are appreciated and i will astral project into your room and hug you ≽ܫ≼
banner by @karinasbaby i love you this one's for you big dawg. year in the making, let's go
“Didn’t think you were going to grace us with your presence tonight, Miss Probation,” Jaeyun smirks as you get out of your car, swinging both of your legs out closed like a lady so as to not flash anyone with the black miniskirt you’re wearing. He greets you with an air-kiss to your cheek, to which you roll your eyes—although you bask in the way the other girls stare at the two of you. If only they knew how annoying your best friend actually was.
“It’s Jungwonie’s turn to race for us, so who am I to deprive my brother and the team of our good luck charm? We need all the luck we can get tonight,” you reply, taking a seat on the hood of your baby pink Supra. “We’re on a good win streak. Might even take this season’s cup without me.”
The other racers from different teams have started to arrive, many of them making their way over to say hello to you. You give your girls—Jimin, who races for Razor; Aeri, the beloved race girl; and Soyeon, a member of the AZ team—air-kisses from across the parking lot. You aren’t feeling like walking over to the groups they’re mingling with. (And because you don’t feel like being near Hwang Hyunjin right now.)
“Fair enough,” he acquiesces, sitting beside you when you pat the spot next to him. “But you know, Wonie is better than you think—”
“Hey, you never let me sit on your car,” Wonbin says, striding over to you with a smirk. You glance up at him, and he looks like he’s expecting you to either push Jaeyun off or scoot over yourself—either way, he wants a turn.
Basically everyone in your little racing scene does, but you think it’s more fun to work them like dogs than to give in to anyone. Especially not after what happened with— “You’re not even in Enigma, Wonbin. Privilege is for teammates only, get lost,” Jaeyun says condescendingly.
He looks at you again, like an expectant puppy—which only works if it’s Jaeyun doing it to you— waiting for you to reach into your purse. You sigh and reach in and feel around for a particular wrapper. “Here. Go away.”
The Australian snickers as Wonbin walks away dejectedly. “The grandma coffee candy, huh?”
“He was too cocky, that's all he deserves tonight. Even if he’s cute. He’s lucky I gave him anything at all.”
“What about me? I’m cuter,” Jaeyun asks, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear with his signature cheeky grin, batting his eyelashes at you the way you do to him. You’re used to flirting with him; it’s more of a way to keep both your skills and his sharp than anything romantic or suggestive. After all, you grew up with Jaeyun, and you know all his embarrassing secrets just like he knows yours. One time in high school, the two of you fake-dated for a week to get some girl too obsessed with him for her own good to leave him alone. It’s safe to say she didn’t buy it, not one bit. You and him bickered too much for it to be believable, and you accidentally screamed when he kissed you on the forehead.
“Hmm…” Playfully, you pretend to be deep in thought, hand digging in your purse again. “Here.”
His face lights up in innocent delight, a huge contrast to his outfit of baggy cargo pants, oversized hoodie, and sneakers, complete with a thick, iced-out Cuban-link chain around his neck. “Ooh, yum! Grape Hi-Chew!”
You roll your eyes. “I only carry that for you, loser. Everyone knows the mango one is the best.”
“You just say that because grape was—”
“Hey, Y/N! Nice wrap,” Riki says, waving his long arms at you like he’s drowning. The tall, newly-turned 21-year-old bounds towards you before tackling you in a hug that sends you almost crashing into the ground, your hands flying to tug the hem of your skirt down lest your protective younger brother scold you about not dressing for the weather. It’s a cold spring night, as proven by Riki who’s in a loose, knitted navy blue sweater and destroyed light wash jeans.
“Jeez, Riki, I just saw you yesterday, no need to suffocate me,” you grumble affectionately, reaching up to muss his black-and-silver hair before sitting back down on the hood of your car. You’ve been fond of the boy since Jungwon brought him over one day, his first new friend since losing his best friend (and one of yours, honestly) in a betrayal that still hurts to speak of to this day. Riki clings onto you like you’re his older sister, too, and you reckon it probably has something to do with missing his own sister back home. “You saw me finish the wrap on the car, too, remember? Jimin and Soyeon were there.”
“Yeah, yeah, but it looks good even at night! Very professional. Maybe you can wrap the GTR next?” he says, to which you side-eye him, and he adds, “I can pay you.”
“You can pay for my meals every time we go out to eat for the next three months and I’ll call it even.”
He laughs. “Okay, deal. You eat less than Jungwon hyung, anyways.”
“Why are you talking shit about me to my sister again, freak?” your younger brother demands, making his way up to the small crowd that’s starting to form around you, Riki, and Jaeyun. He looks taller today, you think to yourself, and when he comes into full view, you see that he’s riding on the back of an unfamiliar person, a tall man with a sharp jawline and a pretty nose, whose bangs droop over his eyes. He’s wearing a white tank top and jeans, with a black and blue leather racing jacket covering his torso from the chilly Seoul air.
“Well, did I fucking lie?” Riki snaps back, arms crossed. You hide your laugh in the crook of your arm, eyes locking with the man who’s got your brother draped over his broad shoulders like a backpack. He looks at you intensely, in a way that makes you feel like he’s got x-ray vision or something. You feel like your insides are turning into lava. What’s his deal?
“Whatever, cricket legs.” Jungwon jumps off the man’s back, shaking his hair out of his eyes. You notice that he’s yet again stolen one of your oversized hoodies. “Oh, hyung! This is my sister, by the way. Noona, this is Sunghoon hyung. He’s joining Enigma.”
He’s cute, pretty, even, and you like that. You’ve always preferred pretty boys. And up until about five seconds ago, you would have said that—even though your ex-boyfriend is a cheating bastard who deserves nothing but suffering—he was still the prettiest man you’ve come across.
But this one, this one in front of you right now, this one takes the cake. He’s got full, thick brows that frame dark almond eyes, and his cheekbones flow into his jawline in a way that makes you think his face has probably stopped traffic at least once in his life. Before you stare at him for way too long, you reach into your purse and pull out one of your mango-flavored Hi-Chews (from your personal stash) to give him.
“Hi, Sunghoon. Nice to meet you. Welcome to Enigma.”
He repeats his own version of your greeting a bit too curtly for your liking, but you don’t care either way, he’ll be under your thumb in no time, just like everyone else, just the way you like. Rolling the wrapped cube in his hand, he asks, “What’s this for?”
To which you reply, “Oh, nothing. I just like candy.”
“I feel like ‘like’ is an understatement,” Riki snorts, sticking his hand in your purse for something he can snack on. You sigh and hand him your purse for him to rummage around more freely.
Sunghoon raises an eyebrow at that, but turns to you anyways. “Do you race, too? I don’t want to assume or anything.”
You give him a coy smile, translucent bubblegum-pink-manicured fingernails clicking against the hood of your car as you drum your fingers against it. “Yeah, I do. I’m banned from racing right now, though, until the end of the season at least.”
He cocks his head like a curious puppy, blinking slowly at you. Oh, no. He’s cute and probably doesn’t know it, but he’s definitely dressed like he knows he’s hot. “Why’s that?”
Your smile turns into a smug smirk as you answer, “Because I go too fast.”
“Fourth-gen Supra,” he muses, glancing between your bare legs at the titanium Toyota emblem on the hood that you’d had imported from Japan. For some reason, you have to resist the urge to squeeze your thighs together. “Cute.”
“Oh? And what’s your ride?”
“Beamer M8 Comp,” Sunghoon says, an air of nonchalance about the answer like it’s nothing special. It kind of pisses you off. You’re pretty certain he didn’t win that car by racing for the pink slip like you did with your Supra. Before you got that car, Jungwon’s 350Z was yours, and you’d only had it because you salvaged it from a junkyard and rebuilt the whole damn thing yourself when you weren’t working or sleeping.
If there’s one thing you might hate more in this life than cheaters, it’s people who come from money, people who didn’t understand or couldn’t comprehend that they were playing life on easy mode. People who never had to suffer, because, to you, they never learned anything.
Sure, you had a hard life. Sure, your parents kicked you and Jungwon to the curb when the both of you refused to take over the family business. Sure, you worked hundreds or, more likely, thousands of hours just to make ends meet and take care of your brother while the two of you finished school. Sure, you wished you could have enjoyed your youth more instead of having to worry about money.
But instead, you had to pay the price for your freedom. Part of you still wonders if it was all worth it. If you should have stayed in your hometown. If you should have just went along with the arranged marriage your parents were proposing with someone you didn’t even know instead of running away with your ex and dragging Jungwon to hell with you.
Okay, maybe it really pisses you off.
“Ooh, rich boy,” you deadpan, your long nails preventing you from balling your hands into fists. You deny him the pleasure of seeing you roll your eyes back into your head. “Daddy must have spent a lot on you.”
“That’s not very welcoming to say,” he shoots back, although his voice is just as flat, his eyes narrowed at you.
You pout mockingly at him. “I’m just teasing our newest member—don’t worry, silver spoon. It’ll be over for you sooner if you decide to quit while you’re ahead.”
“You scared you won’t be the best racer on the team anymore or something, princess?”
“Just wait for me to get off probation and I’ll make you eat my brake dust, Daddy’s Money.”
“You’re already calling me daddy, even though we just met? Because it was my money that bought the car, for the record.”
You’re a little embarrassed and also slightly turned on, neither of which you would ever admit to even Jaeyun, and he knows you just about as well as he knows every single Fortnite map. “Tell someone who cares.”
The back-and-forth between the two of you is thankfully cut short as everyone hears the roar of a particular engine, marking the arrival of Enigma’s leader. You could just kiss him for his impeccable timing—if it weren’t for the fact that neither of you saw each other that way. You reckon both of you would rather eat a jean jacket than get more intimate than the platonic skinship that marks your friendship with him and the other Enigma boys.
People move aside as he puts the metallic, slime green Lamborghini Huracan in reverse and backs up into the parking spot next to you. The ostentatious exotic car belonging to Jay was gifted to him by one of his first clients, a filthy rich businessman who respected and admired Jay’s hard work and dedication to his job despite Jay being a corporate grunt in those days. During this period in your lives, Jay never once showed up late to a meeting with Mr. Big—even when his old Mitsubishi Lancer finally gave up on him after years of being pushed to its limit, even if it meant he had to wake up at three in the morning to start walking from his old apartment in Ahyeon-dong to Gangnam to make the scheduled 6 AM meetings—since the subways unfortunately didn’t operate until 5:30.
After Old Moneybags found out about Jay’s struggle, it was safe to say your best friend wasn’t on hard times for very long after that.
“Jay!” you call out, playing up your role as the only girl in Enigma just to assert dominance over the racer groupies in attendance tonight. You haven’t seen him since the last race, on account of the both of you being too busy with your work schedules to hang out properly. You immediately nudge past everyone—including Sunghoon, who you intentionally brush up against, your ass against his leg—to be the first to greet him.
“Hey, sweets, missed you,” he says, pulling you into a hug. “You doing okay?”
“Yeah, been just fine. You know me, I’m a big girl. I can take care of myself,” you assure him with a smile. He pinches your cheek. “What about you?”
“Oh, same shit, different day. Hoping I finally clutch this huge promotion at work. Head of an entire department,” he answers, protective hand on your waist as he guides you back to the rest of the Enigma boys. Along the way, he daps up some of the other racers who say hi to him, before giving Sunghoon, Jungwon, and Riki a dap and that weird side hug that guys who are close friends do. “Have you met Sunghoon yet?”
“Yeah, I have.” Your lips form into a slight pout, even though you know everyone but Riki is immune to your occasional petulance. “No one told me we were getting a new member. I thought we agreed to vote if it ever happened again? And… I thought it was never going to happen again?”
“You weren’t answering your phone when we voted, so Riki and Wonie took your vote,” Jaeyun snickers, shaking Jay’s hand and giving him the one-armed, “definitely not gay, bro” hug. “Think you had the group chat muted again.”
“Well, that was for good reason,” you argue crossly. While you loved your boys, that didn’t stop them from getting on your nerves at least once a day. “I was mad at you guys for not wanting to go get milk tea with me. And then you got it without me, clearly.”
“Didn’t we bring you some that night, though?” Jay retorts, ever the level-headed one when his temper wasn’t getting the best of him.
“Yeah… but I wanted to come! We live in the same building, for fuck’s sake!”
“It was a boys’ night, silly. Are you a boy?” Jaeyun pats your head and you swat his hand away, grumbling under your breath at him to not to touch you and to fuck off.
Your attention veers to Jungwon as he turns to Sunghoon, who’s standing with his arms crossed, watching you bicker with the boys from a distance. “Don’t mind her, she’s always like this. You ready to race?”
“Always like what, Yang Jungwon?” you ask mirthlessly, hands on your hips.
“A brat!” Jaeyun and Jay answer on his behalf, tugging you away so as to allow the racers on tonight’s card to drive up to the starting line, and everyone else can get behind them.
That’s how your scene’s races have worked since you were tasked with changing the rules two years ago; two drivers from each team participating would race, while the others would drive behind them as pace cars. They would also be ready to distract the police at a moment’s notice and keep the roads clear of civillians. It was as ethical as you could make it, and, honestly, it worked and kept everyone safe.
On this night, you’ve been roped into Jaeyun’s metallic blue Mustang Shelby GT500, with glimmering white racing stripes you added on yourself, huffing and muttering to yourself about how the boys were being “mean” to you in front of Sunghoon to try and impress him. Jay has gone ahead to wait at the finish line. He’d refused—again—to not “put the Huracan anywhere near any of these morons with driver’s licenses,” and so he’s there to note down the order in which the racers arrive, armed with several precisely-calibrated stopwatches.
You yourself have refused to ride with any other driver even though many of them offered to bring you along as their “passenger princess”. You will only ever ride with one of your boys. Riki is in his blacked out R35 Nissan GT-R, the other seats occupied with the life-sized plastic skeletons that he “borrowed” from his school’s anatomy lab. He’s cruising beside Jungwon, and behind you and Jaeyun; Sunghoon is in his own car beside you two.
“How’d you even meet that guy, anyways?” you groan to your best friend, trying to shield your eyes with the way Riki’s obnoxiously bright, blue underglow on his car is blinding you in your side mirror. Your hand dangles out of the open window, fingertips tapping idly on the outside of the door. “He’s so unfriendly.”
“Actually, he’s pretty cool when you get to know him. Riki and I met him at the gym a few weeks ago. He asked if one of us could spot him on the bench press—for three plates, that’s fucking sick! But, uh, yeah. We started working out together after that.”
You scoff. “Oh, great. Another meathead like you two.”
“Y/N, that’s not nice,” Jaeyun chides, glancing at you with the same affection of an older brother, even though you’re both 24 years old. “You’re not being very nice tonight.”
“Well, neither is he. He’s just some spoiled little rich boy who thinks he’s better than everyone.”
“Um… so am I, honestly… and so is Riki, honestly, but you don’t say anything about that, do you?”
You begin to reply, but you frown as Sunghoon speeds past the two of you in his pearly black BMW M8 Competition, the exhaust pipes screaming bloody murder, heading for the starting line just a hundred feet ahead. “Did he hear me say that about him?”
“Most likely.”
“Fuck.”
Part of you wants to apologize; maybe you’re being a little harsh on him, maybe you’re projecting your feelings towards this guy just because he reminds you of a certain someone, maybe you need to finally come to terms with what you’ve been denying for all these years.
Jaeyun pulls up to his spot behind the racers, right between Riki’s GT-R and Jungwon’s 350Z. You signal to the Nissan Boys, as you affectionately call your little brothers, to put their seatbelts on. They both pretend to sigh begrudgingly as they buckle themselves in.
The race girl is your good friend, Aeri, who every guy in your racing division is also obsessed with. Between the two of you, you think that she’s the truly adored one, because she is still as sweet as the day you met her—and you have an inclination to terrorize anyone of the opposite sex who rubs you the wrong way (due to your past). You can’t help it though, and, surprisingly, none of the boys who fall at your feet fault you for it.
But no one ever seemed to feel the need to prove you wrong, either, and that was your problem with them.
Aeri stands in between the middle two drivers, reaching under her top to unclip her bra. You take this as your cue to pull out the megaphone from where it sits waiting at your feet. Leaning out of the window, you announce, “First one to the base of Namsan Mountain wins! I expect a clean race, no funny business. Take no shit, but do no harm!”
“Isn’t that backwards?” Jaeyun whispers to you. You wave him off. He’s right, but you’re trying to emphasize your point about not dragging any innocent people into the racers’ mess.
You continue.“Tonight’s winner will receive the cash prize from me, personally, at a later time. Are we clear?”
A chorus of revved engines gives you your answer. “Alright. Aeri, count us down?”
She nods, pulling out her bra from her top and holding it up in the air. “‘Kay! You guys will go on 1! Ready? 3… 2… 1!” At the final number, she lets the hot pink satin garment drop to the ground, and everyone guns it, driving off in a flurry of exhaust smoke and burnt rubber.
“How much was the buy-in tonight, sweetie?” Jaeyun asks, using his own form of the sugar-derived nickname for you.
“Five million won apiece,” you answer. You scroll through Yun’s phone and play a song on his obnoxiously overpriced sound system. You’ve been joking to your friends that you’re in your “girl Future” era, citing your borderline toxic behavior towards the other racers who constantly slide in your DMs as proof that you’re literally the female version of the rapper. It doesn’t help that your coworker, Minjeong (who is also your self-appointed “work wife”), encourages you to torment men.
“‘I Serve the Base’? Really?” he snorts, leaning back in his seat. “You’re in a mood tonight, huh?”
“I dunno, it just fits the vibe,” you shrug. “Just quit yapping and drive, please.”
“Like I said, a mood.”
You sigh and physically turn away from him like a petulant girlfriend would—knees pointing towards the door and all—and stare out of the passenger window at the cars in front of you. You watch as Wonbin and Hyunjin duke it out on the road, trying to put each other in last place. The way they’re maneuvering their cars makes you a little uncomfortable, but also annoyed that they clearly didn’t listen to a word you said not two minutes ago. “Yunie, flash your high beams at them.”
“Say please.”
You look at him in confusion. Where’d he learn to say that?
“Sorry, Sunghoon does that to Riki and Jungwonie all the time.”
Yikes. Part of you hopes he doesn’t do it to girls, too… but you wouldn’t mind it if he were to do it to you. It’s high time someone really makes an effort to put you in your place, honestly. You reach behind you, to the back seat and grab the laptop you took from Riki, opening it up and typing furiously.
“What are you doing?”
“Accessing the street cameras,” you answer like it’s obvious. Being nefariously good at using the Internet was a perk that came with hanging out with your brother way too much. “I want to see what’s going on.”
“Well? Give me the rundown, then.”
“Jungwonie is in third place, it looks like. He’s gapped Hyunjin in front of us by at least a kilometer… and he’s approaching San and Wooyoung real quick. But—fuck, wait.” You click through a bunch of tabs, scanning the screen faster than when you’re reading twenty-six text message screenshots that Aeri sent you to dissect. “I can’t find Sunghoon anywhere.”
“What? What do you mean you can’t find him? Did he get pulled over or something?” he asks, lowering the volume of his speakers using the button on his steering wheel, eyes still trained on the road in front of him. He flashes his lights again, this time at just Wonbin to pick up the pace, urging him to pass Riki—who now has his underglow set to a stealthy dark red—up ahead.
“No… just… wait, give me a sec… oh, holy fuck.” You click through the camera footage, rewinding it and slowing down the playback. “Oh, my God.”
“Jesus Christ, what is it? You can’t just cliffhanger me like that!”
“I can’t see him because his lights are off.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I think he has a mod on his car—you literally can’t see him unless he drives under a streetlight.”
“Wait, that’s what Riki imported for him?!”
“What the—oh shut the fuck up, it was me who imported that light system! That fucker said it was for a friend when I asked him why he was buying new bulbs, ‘cause I knew he just got those halo LEDs!” You take a deep breath before sticking your hand in the pocket of Jaeyun’s pants.
“Yo! I thought we agreed not to fuck in the car! And especially not while I’m driving—but I guess I shouldn’t turn down some road head…”
“God, shut up, you perv! I need to get your phone and call Sunghoon!” you cry out. “He needs to turn his lights on, what if he gets hit by someone?!”
Jaeyun laughs. He laughs. At your misery, or your panic, or at you. “So you do like him.”
“Shut the fuck up, seriously, Yun, I just don’t want anyone getting hurt. We’re already on thin ice with the cops as it is!”
“Shoutout San, though,” he chuckles, shifting gears so he can close the gap between him and Wonbin, who is starting to approach Hyunjin again.
Your friend Choi San, also a racer on the AZ team, is from a family of high-ranking Seoul Police Department officials; he’d gotten pretty much everyone off the hook more than once for various traffic violations. You keep a stash of mint chocolates in your purse for whenever he’s around—even if they remind you of your ex-best friend—as your way of thanking him for keeping everyone’s records clean. It also helps that he absolutely loves your attention.
“You’re so annoying, Sim Jaeyun. Let me call Sunghoon, seriously.”
“Dude, chill, look at the cams again. The gap between everyone is getting smaller.”
You check the laptop screen again, and he’s right. You see Jungwon overtake both San and Wooyoung, and while you’re still holding your breath in worry over your baby brother, another part of your heart soars with pride at how good he’s gotten. You’d like to think that he got his driving skills from you, even though it was your stupid prick of an ex-boyfriend who first put him behind the wheel of a car.
But when you look up, you notice that Jaeyun is distracted trying to change the song playing on his phone. And there’s a sharp turn coming up ahead. You feel sick, adrenaline immediately rushing through your bloodstream.
Instead of screaming nonsense, you slam the laptop shut, tossing it on the floor and practically crawling across the center console to grab the wheel with one hand and the e-brake with the other. You drive your knee into Jaeyun’s leg to floor the accelerator, and at the same time, you deploy the e-brake and turn the steering wheel hard. The car drifts around the turn with ease, thanks to him immediately springing into action, tossing his phone somewhere in the cupholders and countersteering as he shifts gears.
“Pay attention next time,” you mutter in annoyance, as if the two of you almost crashing was a slight inconvenience and nothing more.
“Sorry, Mommy,” he snorts, downshifting back to his cruising speed. You give him the middle finger as you watch the cars change formation in front of you. Hyunjin cuts off Wooyoung at the junction between two roads, and Wooyoung swerves in the opposite direction to avoid hitting San to his left. Wonbin approaches from behind San, flashing his lights, trying to get one of them to move over, but they both downshift, forcing Wonbin to brake, fall back, and move over to try and find another opening.
And then it happens.
You hear a distinct 8-liter engine roaring furiously somewhere in the vicinity, but you see nothing. You think for a second that it could be the sound of a police helicopter overhead, but you doubt it, not if San tipped off his family that there would be a race tonight, and he always does, because you remind him to do it. You think that he pretends to forget just so you’re forced to text him and he’ll have an excuse to talk to you, but you don’t really care because he’s sweet and always earns himself the best of your candy stash—although you’ll reluctantly admit that Sunghoon has been the first to get the candy that you carry for yourself.
Because you’re not allowed to smoke inside Jaeyun’s car, you unwrap another mango Hi-Chew and wonder if Sunghoon would taste like you if you kissed him. Sure, you don’t like him all that much so far, but he’s hot, so maybe you could just hook up with him and dip—
Oh, who are you kidding? You haven’t slept with anyone since your ex, even though everyone thinks otherwise. You’ve made out with San and Hyunjin a few times, much to the amusement of Jaeyun and Jay, but you never let it get past that. You just go home and use your vibrator to finish the job. Sex is too intimate, feels too much like baring your soul to someone else and you don’t want anyone to get too close like that any time soon.
Too close, too close, too close just like the sound of that engine, and it snaps you out of your thoughts. Sunghoon finally turns his lights on, and reveals his location for everyone to see. He’s at the front, way ahead of even Jungwon, who is currently trying to keep Hyunjin off his tail.
No one but Sunghoon ever had a chance to win.
The race ends before you can truly even register this fact, and everyone parks at the base of Namsan Mountain to congratulate the winner, who seems insanely put-off by all the attention.
“Jay,” you say, approaching the Huracan driver quietly, your shoes crunching the gravel beneath you.
He looks up from his phone at you, jawline illuminated by the screen. The way he slightly tilts his phone away from you signals that he’s texting Aeri. You laugh inwardly; he doesn’t know that you know about them secretly hooking up. “Mm?”
“What was Sunghoon’s time?” you ask. Your bottom lip is tucked under your teeth, and you don’t even realize how hard you’re biting down.
“Eight minutes, twenty three seconds.”
You gulp. Like actually, visibly gulp, as if you’re swallowing a hard-boiled egg whole like some cartoon character. “Oh. That’s—”
“Almost a whole minute faster than your record. He told me he took a detour somewhere at the halfway point.”
“He’s good,” you admit. “Just like—”
Jay interrupts you again, pocketing his phone. “Don’t say his name, sweets. They’re nothing alike.”
You turn to him, eyes searching for answers. He simply puts a hand on your shoulder before pulling you into the hug he knows you need right now. “It’s been two years,” you mutter into the fibers of his cashmere sweater, hoping that the knit is dense enough that it drowns out the sound of your voice. “Why do I still bring him up?”
“He was a big part of your life. And ours, too. It’s okay. You’re going to have to accept that none of it was your fault eventually.”
“And stop taking it out on anyone else that comes after him, huh?”
Jay pats you on the back. “Bingo.”
“Wait, no one ever gave me a real answer, but why do Jaeyun and Riki live together? And Jay and Jungwonie?” Sunghoon asks. He’s sitting across from you in the former pair’s living room, letting your younger brother lean against him as the alcohol takes over Jungwon’s weak tolerance.
You raise your glass like it’s an extension of your hand, leaning against the bottom of Jay’s leather couch where you sit beside him. “That was my idea, when I was moving out of my old apartment. I lived there with my ex, until I kicked him out. When my lease was ending, all of us decided to move to a new building—this one—and I figured that each of the two young ones should have a hyung to look after them. But also, I didn’t want anyone living with me.”
The last part leaves everyone silent, and you laugh, adding, “Why do you guys look surprised? I told you that when we were signing our leases.”
Sunghoon looks at Riki to his right, who is trying to make a soju bomb with more soju and less beer, and then across from Riki at Jaeyun, who is egging him on to just drink straight from the soju bottle, and back at Riki, who listens to the Australian intently, like he’s some sort of genius. “Are you sure that was a good idea?”
You wave him off. “Oh, yeah. They’re just off the clock right now. You know, can’t be serious all the time.” Oops, another dig at him.
Your phone chimes with notification after notification, and it’s not just updates from Candy Crush. It’s text messages, and not the good kind from Aeri or Soyeon telling you which racer they’ve gone home with tonight.
Before you can silence your phone, though, Jaeyun, who’s on your other side, picks up your phone, laughing exaggeratedly as he waves your glowing screen in the air. “Guys, look! I told you it was gonna happen!”
“What?” Sunghoon asks, eyebrows knitted together in confusion. You shake your head at him and mouth the words “don’t listen to him”.
But then Jay starts cackling, catching your phone over your head when Jaeyun throws it to him in order to read the messages out loud. You don’t even bother fighting their teasing anymore; in fact, you’re a little excited, because you know your boys are about to go in on whoever’s hitting you up. “Okay, let’s see what we’ve got here! From Wonbin: ‘it was nice seeing you tonight, do you want to hang out this week?’”
“Ewww, gross,” Jaeyun groans with a mouthful of fries. “He was literally trying to sit on the Supra when Y/N pulled up!”
His revelation is met with a chorus of laughs and jeers as your boys mock Wonbin for his transgression, for being so stupid and arrogant to think that you would have just given him a free pass. After all, that car is your baby. You suffered a lot for it, and not just anyone could come up and touch it. In fact, one time, Jungwon was banned from riding in your car for a month because he got his fingerprints on your side mirrors.
“Did San-hyung text noona?” Riki’s nosy ass asks, running up behind the couch and diving onto it to look over Jay’s shoulder. Jay pushes his head away. “Oh, shit, he did!”
Jungwon sighs, slumping further even against Sunghoon. “God, just read it and put me out of my misery. He’s so down bad for her, it’s disgusting.”
Jaeyun giggles, and kicks his sock-covered feet like a schoolgirl. “He’s probably gonna ask her on another date and make her bike along the Han River again.”
This makes you choke on your drink, and it almost comes out of your nose. “Hey, I thought we we agreed not to bring that up.”
“It’s not every day I open my Instagram and see your stupid ass fighting for your life getting hard-launched on his story,” he snorts. “Watching you trying to ride that bike gave me second-hand embarrassment.”
“Yeah, it’s like he didn’t even care that you looked stupid, he was really trying to let everyone know that he was out with you,” Jay adds. “Way to keep it lowkey, or whatever.” Your face burns hot with embarrassment as you realize that Yunie has taken out his own phone to pull up the screen recording of San’s Instagram story to show Sunghoon. Now you actually want to smack the phone out of his hand, but you figure it’s fine, you don’t care if he sees you like that. It shouldn’t matter, he’s just one of the guys now. He could join in the teasing for all you care.
Right?
“Yo, hold the fuck up, Y/N, I thought you and Hyunjin were done?” Jay says, scrolling through your notifications.
Your eyes flick up to Sunghoon, who is currently trying to busy himself with separating the perilla leaves—that no one has so much as breathed in the direction of tonight—as he seems to not pay attention to the video, or to what Jay is saying. Either that, or he really doesn’t find it funny. “Put it away, Yunie,” he says quietly, one hand gently pushing back Jaeyun’s phone towards him. “That’s too much. You’re embarrassing her.”
“I thought so, too,” you sigh at Jay, trying not to acknowledge the fact that Sunghoon may or may not have just stood up for you against your best friend. “He ignored my texts for, like, four days, and you guys know how much I absolutely hate that. I know I lag, too, but never that long. At least I’d tell you that I’m busy or whatever. Fuck’s sake.”
“What did Hyunjin hyung say?” Jungwon mumbles. He’s now using Sunghoon’s lap as a pillow, and the sight makes you feel a little soft. You love your younger brother to bits and pieces, and seeing him like this reminds you of the times he’d come home really tired from school and fall asleep at your dining table while you prepared dinner for the two of you. You often yearn for that period in your life, when things were much simpler and the only thing you were sad about was missing your family.
Now you have a new family, but another part of your heart is broken, and time hasn’t healed it—at least, not completely.
“He’s asking if she’s busy this week,” Riki answers. Part of you wants to drag him by the hair and put him on a one-way flight back to Japan. “Oh, Jay hyung is checking her calendar. Yikes, hyung… You’re still pushing that agenda?”
“What agenda?” Sunghoon pipes up after gulping down the last of his beer, his lips glossy from the liquor.
“Oh, he just thinks they’d be cute together,” the freakishly tall boy rambles, making a gesture out of Jay’s line of sight that signals to Sunghoon that Jay is crazy. The alcohol has made you basically nonverbal at this point, and you just let Riki explain your lore to the hot new member of your racing crew. Hopefully Sunghoon doesn’t remember any of it in the morning.“It’s kind of about time that noona gets a new boyfriend. Personally, though, me and Yunie-hyung are on Team San.”
“Isn’t that up to her though?” Sunghoon muses. “Like, why does it matter if she’s single or dating around?”
“Because she’s not that type of person who actually can do anything casual,” Jaeyun interjects, putting a hand over Riki’s mouth, only to pull away in disgust when Riki licks his palm. He wipes the drool off on Jay’s arm. “She just does it because she doesn’t want to get too close to anyone who isn’t us. So it’s a vicious cycle. She says she’s healing, but she can’t fully heal the part of her that was wounded because she needs to be in a relationship with someone who will be patient with her and prove her wrong. Someone who will help her finally get over… him.”
“I figured, from what you told me before,” Sunghoon says quietly to your supposed best friend. He’s not really being much of a best friend now, you think, even though everything he’s said is both correct and true.
This piques your interest. Your index finger circles around the rim of the open bottle of soju that you’d confiscated from Riki. “What do you know?”
“Ey, Hoon, watch what you say, I don’t want her throwing her drink at me!”
You roll your eyes and look back at Sunghoon. “Don’t listen to him. Tell me what Jaeyunie told you, and I’ll decide if I throw it at him or not.”
“Well—”
“Hey, sorry to interrupt,” Jay says, setting down his now-empty glass of beer with a smug, victorious grin. “Well, actually, I’m not, but I texted Hyunjin back and said you’d meet him at that new fancy Italian restaurant in Gangnam on Wednesday at 7. And before you say anything, yes, you’re free that day. I checked your calendar and your emails.”
You flaked on your date with Hyunjin. To teach him a lesson, of course.
But you do start seeing more and more of Park Sunghoon as the weeks pass, what with him being a full-fledged, initiated member of Enigma now. And you hate to admit it, but he’s starting to grow on you, even though you still think he’s kind of stoic—mostly towards you. You can tell he’s softening a bit, though.
Because, truth be told, you’ve also observed him to be honest and kind and genuine, the latter the rarest thing you see amongst the racers involved in your second life who throw themselves at you like moths to a flame. He’s sincere, but he also doesn’t mince his words, so you have no choice but to take them at face value. You like watching him get along with the other boys in your life, the only ones you truly love, the ones who have done nothing but love you like a family could and couldn’t.
Riki, for one, loves to pester Sunghoon when he’s around and makes you sit and keep score for them while they play table tennis in the game room of your apartment complex. They’re both extremely competitive, and you think to yourself that Sunghoon is such a good sport even when Riki’s elaborate, well-choreographed victory dance gets too annoying even for you to tolerate. You’re pretty sure he adds a new move every single time he does it.
They go to the gym on days where Riki’s done with class early enough to beat rush-hour, and they bring you along for dinner afterwards if you feel like coming. Riki’s now got a debt to pay to you, on account of you wrapping his GT-R in a metallic oil-slick color. You and Sunghoon chose it together, because no one else was replying to you in the group chat. Sunghoon even helped you install it, if helping you meant feeding you dumplings from a takeout container because your hands were full with the heat gun in one and a felt-edge squeegee in the other.
For an entire weekend, he sat in your garage with you quietly, making idle conversation when the white noise would get too much for even him. He asked you about yourself, and you told him about how you met Jake in third grade, when his family moved to your hometown all the way from Australia, and how you became friends with him only because you were the only one in your class who knew how to speak decent English. (You watched a lot of American TV shows on illegal streaming sites.) In turn, you asked him if he likes his job as an investment banker, and he tells you that he wanted to be an automotive engineer when he was younger, but every man in his family works in finance and expected him to do the same.
This admission prompts you to share that you were supposed to step up and run your family’s successful chain of restaurants, but you refused to do so, choosing instead to run away with your boyfriend at the time and follow him to Seoul for the two of you to go to college. Jungwon even came with you, and you let him. Sunghoon asks you if you regret it. You say no, because, really, you don’t. But you do still have trouble sometimes trying to understand why some of the people you loved the most in this life—your mother, your father, and later on, your boyfriend—did not care if you were happy.
They only really cared that you did as you were told.
And Jay, much to your amusement, happens to be at the butt of most of Sunghoon’s teasing—whenever he’s in his extroverted mood, that is. They bicker much like Tom and Jerry, but you can tell that they get along just fine deep down. After all, Sunghoon’s been helping Jay decorate his and Jungwon’s apartment, listening (more like tolerating, if anyone were to ask you) to Jay ramble on and on about Herman Miller chairs and Noguchi lamps, and no one else can be in the same room as him when he gets like that, and that’s saying something because your apartment is also decorated in the mid-century modern style.
Jungwon sometimes tags along with them to furniture showrooms, strictly on the condition that they treat him to a meal afterwards. Sunghoon, not so surprisingly, is always the one who invites you along with them as well, ever since that first night when you complained about the boys getting milk tea without you. You wonder if it’s a pity invite, but you don’t really care much if it is, because he doesn’t seem like the type who does things he doesn’t want to do.
There was this one time two weeks ago that you came along with them to go pick out a new rug—first mistake. Your second mistake was forgetting to eat before leaving your apartment. You sat on a chair clutching your stomach with one hand, scrolling through your phone looking at the drink menus of nearby cafes with the other. Little did you know that Sunghoon, who was standing right beside you, was nosily peeking over your shoulder while also on his phone, typing in the names of whatever menu item you would pause on.
He disappeared for a few minutes after telling you he forgot something in his car. This left you to decompose in your (very cushy) chair while you listened to Jay and Jungwon argue about low-pile versus high-pile rugs. You contemplated how long it would take for them to notice that you’d passed out from hypoglycemia. But then Sunghoon returned, holding a bag from the food delivery app you all like to use. He’d nonchalantly and wordlessly taken out a peach iced tea and a sandwich to hand to you, but you looked up at him like he was God coming down to earth to save you. You thanked him profusely and he actually smiled at you, eyes crinkling up at the corners and turning into pretty crescent moon shapes.
If you didn’t already know that Jaeyun loves women, you’d think that he has a crush on Sunghoon. You seem to have lost your pet best friend to his new pet rich boy. Jaeyun loves to spend time with Sunghoon, even though he’s not at all very talkative. Regardless, every single time you come over to Yun’s apartment, Sunghoon is either already there or five or ten minutes away, depending on the day of the week and the time at which your best friend invites you over to his and Riki’s apartment.
Then the three of you, with the occasional addition of any or all of the three other Enigma boys, will inevitably order some takeout delivery and watch a film—”Not a movie,” you insist—until you inevitably start crying at the plot and say you have to go home before the boys really start making fun of you. Sunghoon always walks you to your door, even though you live just down the hall. You always tell him he doesn’t have to, but he always brushes you off and tells you to get your things so you can leave.
And one time, about a week ago, you heard him scold the other guys for being mean to you, reminding them that even though you’re technically one of the boys, you’re still a girl at heart, and they should make some effort to be nicer to you. You heard him really dig in to Jungwon in particular, and while you kind of felt the urge to come back into the room and defend him, Sunghoon told your brother to show some respect and think about all the things you’d done for him in the past seven years. So you stayed back, still in shock that Sunghoon had spoken up for you so vehemently.
Speaking of your younger brother, your precious baby all grown up, the only family you have left: Jungwon adores Sunghoon, viewing him as the older brother you wished you could have been for him. Yes, Jay and Jaeyun are literally right there, but you can tell that the connection between Jungwon and Sunghoon is different. Jaeyun is good for keeping both Jungwon and Riki out of your hair when you’re busy, and Jay indulges your brother, spoiling him every chance he can get, having no siblings of his own.
Somehow Sunghoon has gotten through to your brother in terms of his life and his career; after all, he’s close to finishing college soon and doesn’t know what he wants to do just yet. You would kill for a chance to help Jungwon, but you reckon he hasn’t come to you because he doesn't want to add to your stress and you could cry at how considerate he can be when he isn’t teasing you. You promise yourself that one of these days you’ll thank Sunghoon for his help, maybe some time after you finally admit to yourself that you were wrong about him being a prick. And maybe you’ll apologize for making assumptions about him in the first place.
Yes, you’ve been observing the way Sunghoon gets along with everyone, and you’re happy, you really are, but something is gnawing at you. While the arrival of new racers in your scene is nothing new, Enigma itself hasn’t been disrupted since Jungwon met Riki and all of that other shit went down.
More importantly, you haven't been disrupted for so long. Two years, to be exact. It’s been two years since you got your heart broken twice, and you’ve spent so long holding everyone at arm’s length away from you because you’re not too keen on ever experiencing that again. Sure, you date around, but like Jaeyun said, they don’t mean anything to you. You know what they want and it’s what you refuse to give them. And then this guy, this fucking guy with pretty brown eyes who is soft-spoken and quiet and has the most beautiful face you’ve ever seen in real life… this fucking guy comes in with the audacity to make you feel like he simultaneously likes you and wants nothing to do with you.
Although you think the latter is just a defense mechanism on your part. You’d tried to convince yourself that he only cares about you so that the boys don’t kick him out of Enigma, because if the two of you didn’t get along, there would be no way he could stay on the team. After all, you’re still their best racer, and more importantly, their best friend. But that can’t be all true, because you fight with the boys sometimes, sometimes real petty fights that end in everyone crying, and you’re still an Enigma member through and through. So telling yourself that Sunghoon secretly hates you because of your ways is a lie on your part.
Because right now, about three months after you’ve first met, when you’re at the club with the boys, there’s no way Sunghoon truly doesn’t like you. The rational part of your brain can recognize that; after all, you’ve watched him countless times coldly brush off the advances of random girls in public who see his credit card and try to take advantage of his generosity.
And you saw with your own two eyes the way he looked at you when you’d asked him if what you were wearing (a white mesh mini dress with baby pink kitten heels) was actually “too much,” and if you should go change like the others had said. You heard with your own two ears when he told you, “It is a bit much, but you look good. If there’s any trouble, don’t worry, I got you.”
It’s a good thing your face was already pink from the makeup you’d dolled yourself up with.
You never have to pay for drinks when you go out. The boys know this. You always tell them to not waste their hard-earned money—or in Jungwon’s case, your hard-earned money—on you when you can get some rich loser to buy you a bottle of Clase Azul if you bat your eyelashes at them and say you want to ring the bell.
Tonight is different, though. Usually you can score some of the top shelf shit without so much as lifting a finger, but because Sunghoon went with you to the bar, you can sense that the men in the club are not willing to put your dirty Shirley Temple on their tab. He doesn’t even have his hand around your waist, but you assume it’s the malevolent energy radiating off him in waves of expensive cologne that have people socially distancing from you like you’ve got the plague.
“Something wrong, Hoon?” you ask him innocently, swapping cocktails with him as you’ve often found yourself doing whenever the two of you are out together. It’s been a running occurrence since you’ve started joining him and the boys on their hangouts. He’ll order whatever you want to try, be it pasta or a coffee, and you can order something else you like. You sip on his Jack and Coke before making a face and taking your tequila sunrise from him.
“Do you want to wear my jacket?” he says, leaning in close so that you can hear him over the thrum of the bass-boosted music. “These creeps are staring at you too hard. It’s freaking me out. Pissing me off, really.”
You shrug. The buzz is starting to really hit you, thanks to your pregaming session at Jaeyun’s before you left for the club. “Doesn’t bother me, I’m used to it. It’s not like any of them have a chance.” You reach over and brush off invisible lint off Sunghoon’s shoulder, lingering a little longer just to feel the hard muscles underneath his clothes. “You do, though.”
He looks at you with his lips pursed in a flat line, a look he often gives Jay when Jay won’t stop pestering him. Then he takes his jacket off and drapes it over you. “Just put this on. I’ll be right back, I have to take a call.” He shows you the glowing screen of his phone, and you can read the contact name. It’s one of his bosses, and you only know this from the time he invited you to have dinner with them (and they’d pestered Sunghoon into bringing a date, since all of them are married).
You nod in understanding and nestle yourself snugly in his leather jacket, the same black-blue-white combination that he’d worn the night you first met. Idly, you sip on your drink, watching the crowd of swaying bodies underneath the colored strobe lights. In the distance, you can spot Jaeyun’s freshly bleached head of wavy hair next to Jay and Wonie, and that’s only thanks to Riki’s freakishly tall frame standing out like a cell phone tower beside them. They’re dancing with a group of girls, and you try not to gag when you see your younger brother let a girl grind up against him.
“Hey, why don’t you take this off? It’s hot enough in here because of you,” someone yells out right beside you, trying to make himself heard over the music. You turn to him, already pissed off because who the fuck says that?
“No thanks,” you say flatly. “I’m good.”
Even if you are feeling a bit hot inside the packed club, there’s something in you that wants to respect Sunghoon’s wishes while he’s gone, because you know behind his cold exterior he means well and it’s his own roundabout way of looking out for you. Either that, or he’s possessive, your delusional brain thinks, catching a whiff of his cologne in the lining of it.
“Well—”
You’re not paying attention to the douchebag beside you. You look back to the crowd and your boys have disappeared, no giant, Oreo-haired Riki to mark where they are. Suddenly, your tequila sunrise threatens to show itself in your throat. You’ve been hit on before, of course, but not like this, not this insistently. You keep your poker face on, trying to figure out how to get away from him but also avoid getting sucked in and trampled on in the giant crowd that just seems to keep doubling in size.
“Is he bothering you, sweetheart?” another voice asks.
You look to your side and he’s there, he’s back, stone-faced and radiating what you would call actual bloodlust. You nod, giving him a look that you hope Sunghoon interprets as get him the fuck away from me.
“You heard her. You’re bothering the lady,” Sunghoon says flatly to the man beside you, in such a manner that leaves no room for argument. “And not just any lady, either. That’s my girl you’re bothering. Get lost.”
You yourself shiver at his tone. You’ve gotten used to seeing the icy but gentle side of him, so this shift startles you, making goosebumps raise on your back in fear and your core clench in need. You decide not to correct Sunghoon, either. The sooner you get out of this bust of a club, the better.
An hour later, you find yourself at one of your favorite restaurants, a little barbecue spot near your apartment building that serves the best marinated galbi you’ve ever had. You’ve taken the boys there countless times, enough for them to make a joke out of it. The place is supposed to be closed right now, on account of it being one-thirty in the morning but when you were in the taxi with Jay and Sunghoon, you overheard the latter on the phone, telling the other person on the line that he’d pay triple to have the place opened for three hours past closing time of midnight.
While Jungwon talks animatedly about the girl in his class who was at the club and how he somehow managed to get her number, Sunghoon serves you before everyone else, putting the strips of grilled meat on your plate. The other boys groan at him, telling him not to indulge you too much or you’ll get used to it and always expect it, just like you’ve done to them. They don’t really mean it, because you know them well enough that they—just like Sunghoon—don’t ever really do things they don’t want to do, but deep down you still hope he doesn’t take their words seriously.
“What’s so bad about that? Ladies first,” is all he replies to them, and you feel warm inside and it’s not just the double shot of peach soju making its way through your body.
“Okay, me next,” Jaeyun says. He’s still got sweat dripping down his forehead from chasing tequila-drunk Riki and Jungwon down and dragging them both by the collars of their shirts into another taxi.
Sunghoon looks at him before passing the tongs to him. “Do it yourself.”
“Jackass.”
This makes your smile widen, giggling to yourself uncontrollably. You take delight in messing with Jaeyun, and seeing the always-stone-faced Sunghoon take part in it brings a certain joy to you that’s both unfamiliar and welcomed. You catch his eye and he sends you a wink, so fast you wouldn’t have caught it if you didn’t have the habit of staring at him when you think he isn’t paying attention to you.
“Dickhead,” Sunghoon shoots back, bushy brows furrowed so cutely that you have the tipsy urge to kiss the peachy skin between them.
“Oh, well, at least if I liked a girl, I’d tell her, so I think that makes you the dickhead and not me.” Jaeyun rolls his eyes and takes a piece of meat out of your bowl, popping it into his mouth and seemingly swallowing it whole.
You frown. “What? Sunghoon likes someone? Is it Jimin? It’s Jimin, isn’t it?”
Jungwon and Riki groan. “Great, another idiot.”
Jay points his chopsticks at your younger brothers. “Shut up and eat your food already.”
“Yes, mother,” they say in unison, digging into their bowls of kimchi fried rice. You look down at your own plate, suddenly losing your appetite. You even consider going outside for a smoke break, but that’s how the boys disappeared at the club a while ago, and it’s too late for you to be going outside alone—at least, that’s what you’re very well aware that they’d argue. Your stomach hurts at the thought of Sunghoon liking another girl, and because you’re you, because you’re almost so self-aware to the point that it could put your therapist out of a job, you know it’s because you want him to like you, and only you.
And it’s not even because you want the same control over him that you have over the likes of San and Hyunjin and Wonbin and whoever else claims to be on your sad excuse of a “roster”. It’s because you like him, and it’s to the point that the only other being who knows this for a fact is your pet cat, because only she wouldn’t accidentally tell him the truth. She’s a cat, for fuck’s sake, a cat you unfortunately named after the girl you think Sunghoon might like.
Maybe the boys have noticed. But you doubt it, because if they did, they would have teased you so mercilessly about it that it would be considered bullying that could be punishable under law. It would be so severe that you’d have no choice but to leave the country if they knew.
What they actually do though, that you’ve picked up on in recent weeks, is their new nasty habit of dropping hints about how you should be with a guy who’s cold to everyone but you. Someone who’s both pragmatic yet thoughtful, someone who always tells the truth but can do so in a way that will spare your feelings because he makes an honest effort to not sound so harsh. Someone who can both protect you and yet also be able to get you to stop when you become… “irrational” was how they put it. Someone you’re attracted to, not just physically, but emotionally, as well.
You’re not stupid, no matter how often you think you are. You know they’re talking about Sunghoon. You know Jungwon and Riki will make plans with you and him and then flake at the last minute so that you two are forced to go out together, alone. They’ve done it enough times that you know it’s bullshit that they have a school assignment due at some random time in the evening. You know Jaeyun will loudly ask Sunghoon what he thinks of a certain girl when he knows you’re within earshot. It pleases you every time Sunghoon flatly replies “What about her? I don’t know her like that.”
And you most definitely know Jay let Sunghoon take you on out to the racetrack to drive his Lamborghini for a few laps, under the guise that you’ve always wanted to go and Jay finally managed to get a slot booked on a day that he “isn’t able to make it” because of a “meeting”. Who the fuck even works on a Sunday?
You fixate on this memory for a while. You can truthfully say it was one of the happiest days of your life.
“You’re telling me you’ve never used paddle shifters before?” Sunghoon asked with a lopsided grin, pulling into the paddock of the race track. Your leg bounces in your seat, not out of anxiety like usual, but out of impatience and excitement.
“I drive stick, why the hell would I use paddle shifters? Sorry not all of us drive M Comps,” you retort, rolling your eyes. “V8 bi-turbo headass. Can’t believe you run an automatic transmission.”
“I’m ignoring that. I’ll track it first.”
“What? No way, I’ve known Jay longer!”
“You’re going to drive it like it’s a city bus. I’m going to drive it like I stole it. You can sit there and look pretty first, then you can have a turn.”
“Sunghoon, if you’re just going to stare at me, you’re going to crash us into a wall.”
“Nah, my peripheral vision’s pretty good. Why, you don’t trust me?”
You sighed. You do trust him, that’s what bothers you.
Ultimately, the idea of Sunghoon liking another girl makes you a little… irritated. That’s actually a gross understatement, if you’re being honest. You can feel the dragon’s head of your jealous streak rise up from the ashes where it had once laid dormant, asleep. It wants to breathe fire. It wants to get a rise out of him. It wants to see his reaction.
Luckily, or unluckily, depending on whose side you’re on, your best friend knows you too well.
“Y/N, can you pass the salt?” Jaeyun, who is sitting to your left, asks. The salt pot is right next to Riki, who is sitting to your right.
Taking this as your opportunity, you look at him, tilting your head before you say the exact line that, by now, everyone knows that Sunghoon likes to use. “Say please.”
Jaeyun is too intoxicated to fight back, but he knows you well enough even in his inebriated state that he knows exactly what you’re doing. “Please?”
“Okay,” you answer, reaching across Riki’s plate to grab the salt. When you hand it to Jaeyun, his fingers linger on yours way too long to be respectable. There’s nothing there, of course. It just feels normal, no spark, no giddy, lovesick warmth. He’s just being outright obvious.
Picking up on your scheme, Jay chimes in, a malicious glint in his eye that only comes out after you can smell the alcohol on his breath. You see him elbow Jungwon at the end of the table—quite subtly, to his credit. “Ew, what are you two doing? That’s gross, get a room.”
Jaeyun rolls his eyes, giving Jay the middle finger. Oh, he’s playing up the dramatics of your ploy to see if Sunghoon cares or not. This is what being friends with him for pretty much your entire life is all about. “Can’t a guy and a girl be best friends? Chill, bro.”
“Guys and girls can’t just be best friends,” Jungwon adds, his mouth full of rice and barbecue. “That’s such a lie. You don’t see me with a girl best friend, because if I had one, I’d be fu—”
Sunghoon’s knee hits the bottom of the table, causing everyone to jump back in surprise. “Sorry, guys.” He looks at you, staring at him wide-eyed. “And lady. Leg cramp.” He gets up from the table and excuses himself to go pay the bill, talking with the older woman who runs the restaurant and who you know is madly in love with him (much to everyone’s amusement).
“Alright, what’s going on here?” Jay asks in a hushed tone, dropping his smirk and leaning forward. “What are we doing to him?”
“Forcing Sunghoon to confess,” Jaeyun answers back, switching to English so only the three of you can understand.
You look at him quizzically, but you speak to him and Jay in English anyways. “Wait, what? I just wanted to make him jealous, what are you talking about—”
“Alright!” Sunghoon says loudly from behind you. “Time to go.”
Exchanging looks with your best friends, you collect your things from where they rest on the worn leather seats of the booth. “I’m gonna take a walk first,” you say. “Anyone wanna join?”
“Nah,” Jaeyun answers. “I’m beat. Gonna take the little ones home.”
“Whoooo the fuck are y-you… callin’ little,” Riki slurs, slumped over a sleepy Jungwon’s shoulder. You know your brother is in a food-and-alcohol-induced coma, since he says nothing about the drool Riki’s getting all over his unbuttoned shirt. “Fuckin’ Oompa Loompa.”
“Riks,” you sigh, getting up on your tip-toes to push his sweat-soaked hair from his face. “Be nice to your Yunie hyung.”
“S-sorry noona,” he hiccups, putting more of his weight on Jungwon, who yelps. “I’ll be nice.”
You shoot Jaeyun a warning look, telling him not to egg on the poor boy who looks like he might throw up in his sleep later. “You guys gonna be okay going home?”
“Yeah, bro, it’s only like a block away,” Jay interjects, prying Riki off of Jungwon and hoisting him onto his own back. Jaeyun takes your brother in his hold, grimacing at the skin-to-skin contact of Jungwon’s bare chest on his fingers. “Go take your little walk. Text us when you’re back.”
“Yes, mother, I promise.” You can feel Sunghoon looming over you like a skyscraper. Without turning to him, you ask, “Are you coming with me?”
“Well,” he answers, his huffed breath blowing over your head in cigarette smoke. “Obviously. I’m not letting you go alone.”
“Okay, I guess,” you mutter with the same tone, shivering to yourself. The air is surprisingly cold for the beginning of June, and you’re dejectedly starting to regret your outfit.
And of course, like clockwork, Park Sunghoon notices your discomfort and quietly puts his jacket over you for the second time that night.
“Thank you.” Your voice comes out in a whisper. He acknowledges you with a soft hum, matching your stride as you cross the empty road to the little park nestled behind the flowering trees.
You continue to walk, trying to think, but it’s difficult to burn off the rest of the alcohol and gain some clarity when the man you’re thinking about is right beside you. You would kill to read his mind. You could just ask him, straight up. It shouldn’t be too hard, right? What’s the worst thing he could say? That he doesn’t have feelings for you? That he sees you as a sister? That he actually does like Jimin like that?
Fuck.
You finally admit to yourself that you do like him. You do like him, you do want him, you do feel those things genuinely and not out of greed, not out of wanting to make him one of your trained dogs, not out of wanting to punish your ex through him.
You… you fucking like him, and it pisses you off. Him, of all people. Liking Jaeyun seems less complicated than this. You know for a fact that Sunghoon is quite possibly the king of hard-to-get. Kazuha and Yunjin, the race girls from AZ, both made a move on him and ended up fighting over him for nothing (which your own girlfriends clowned on them mercilessly for, while you sat back and watched rather smugly). He didn’t even give them the time of day, let alone his phone number.
Minjeong, your beloved work wife, wanted to test that theory and when you’d left them during dinner one time to go use the restroom, she tried to flirt with him. She ended up meeting you in the restroom with a smirk, telling you that he’s impossible to break. She’d even asked you if you considered the fact that maybe he likes men.
Intrigued, you’d “innocently” asked Jaeyun and Riki, of all people, to get you the answer. Eager to please, and glad that they had some new bullshit to do, they came back to you after three hours of pestering Sunghoon at the gym during their workout. They’d reported that they annoyed him so bad he left them at the gym, forcing them to take the train back home.
That night, he texted the group chat “Not gay. Waiting for my wife” and nothing else.
A big shock to the rest of you, to say the least. The boys were busy laughing at the first sentence, while you were fixated on the latter half of his text. His wife. What a strong choice of words, you’d thought. But it was a good thing, too, that he knows what he wants. At least one of you does. A wife. That’s more definite than just wishing to feel safe and secure around other people.
“Did you eat well?” Sunghoon pipes up, finally breaking the chilly silence between the two of you.
“I did,” you reply curtly, now doing your best to match his pace. It’s hard. His legs are so long, with equally long strides, but you push yourself in your heels anyways. “Did you?”
“Yeah. Why do you always flirt back?” Sunghoon asks. He sounds like he’s been holding that in for a while.
“What? Are you talking about Jaeyunie?”
He grimaces. “No. I know that was just him being him. I’m talking about the others. That Wonbin guy. San hyung. Hyunjin hyung. Whoever the fuck. Them.”
You stop walking, and so does he. He turns around to face you as you incredulously ask, “So suddenly? Why? Does it matter?”
Sunghoon rolls his eyes at you. That’s the first time you’ve ever elicited that reaction from him, and it hurts a little. “Yeah, it does. You’re making them think they have a chance with you.”
“Okay, so what?” you say harshly. Really, why does it matter to him? He likes Jimin, doesn’t he? Why is what you do any of his business?
“Well, do they?”
“No!” you snap, hands on your hips. The sound of your voice, echoing through the deserted metal playground, startles the both of you. “None of it is ever serious with them! Men are dogs, anyways!”
“Meow.”
You look at the tall man in disbelief. Under the glow of the lampposts, he looks both sinful and heavenly. Even if he’s pissing you off like never before. Blinking—too shocked to laugh—you ask, “Did you just meow at me, Park Sunghoon?”
“Yeah. Because I’m not a dog, and I’ll prove it to you,” he answers, thick arms crossed over his broad, sturdy chest.
“Why bother doing that? Why does my opinion of you matter to you? It’s none of your business what I think. So why?”
He scoffs. But he can’t seem to meet your eyes. “You’re a smart girl. You’ll figure it out.”
Oh, you’re so annoyed. Why now, of all times, can he not be direct with you? Or is this how he actually is? Has he been pretending to be genuine this whole time? No, that can’t be. People usually can’t keep a facade up for that long without slipping up in between, unless they're sociopaths, serial killers, or both. “No, tell me why. I want to hear it from you. You and your stupid… your stupid… stupid, pretty mouth.”
“Did you just call my mouth pretty?”
“Answer the question, Park Sunghoon!”
He glares at you, but it’s not menacing. After what seems like hours, he sighs, turning away. Then he quietly says, “I love the way you love.”
You realize now that the entire time you’ve been watching Sunghoon, he’s been watching you, too.
“What… what do you mean?”
“The way you care about them. The others… The way you look out for them. For Jungwonie and Riki, always making sure they’ve eaten and they rest enough for school, and that they’re on top of their studies. Jay, you always scold him for working too much. And Jaeyunie, you get worried when he’s not home by a certain time… I realize now that you might not have space in your heart for me. And I should accept that no matter what I do, I’ll always just be another one of your dogs.”
“Sunghoon, what—”
He shakes his head, which hangs low in something you think must be shame. His bangs cover his eyes, so you can’t get a read on him unless you brush them out of his face. And with what he’s just said, you don’t think that now is the best time to touch him. “No. We’re not going to talk about this tonight. Or ever again. I can promise you that. Now come on. I’ll walk you home and we can pretend like this never happened.”
Back in your apartment, you lay in bed, wishing that there was still enough alcohol in your system to put your restless mind to sleep. But there isn’t, not after you walked it all off with an awkwardly silent Sunghoon escorting you back to your apartment. You’d offered your couch for him to sleep on—not out of pity, you’d told him. Out of worry. The trains had stopped running and there were no taxis coming to your side of town anytime soon.
He looked like he really wanted to stay. But for whatever reason, he shook his head at you again, told you it was okay, and said he’d walk home.
You’d texted him to keep you updated on where he was. He didn’t reply. You just got a single notification that “Park Sunghoon has started sharing locations with you,” and that was that. No actual message from him. You share yours right back, telling yourself that it’s fine, all the other Enigma boys had your location, too. But you know the truth.
Sitting up, you reach for your phone and your purse, fishing out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter, both of which you’d stolen from Jaeyun. He would steal them back from you very soon, anyways, what with him sharing one singular, pitiful peach blueberry ice-flavored vape between himself, Jungwon, and Riki.
Your cat follows you curiously as you walk into the living room and slide the glass door to the balcony open. She curls up in your lap when you sit down on the rocking chair, just as she always does when you come out to smoke.
“You know this is bad for you, right?” you joke quietly, scratching her head with the hand not holding a cigarette. “You should be inside, breathing the purified air I pay good money for.”
Mrrow.
“Yeah, yeah, I know I should stop. But you should be proud of me. I don’t even do it that often.” That’s actually the truth. You and the boys all say that drunk cigarettes don’t count, and you can’t call yourself a smoker if you only go through one pack every two weeks at the very least. By Seoul nightlife standards, your lungs are healthy. “You can hiss about it to your Jaeyunie-oppa.”
Meow.
“Okay, Jiji. Whatever you say.” You take a long drag before pulling away, flicking the ash onto the ceramic tray that Riki brought back for you as a souvenir the last time he went home to Japan. “Fuck, I really do like him. Sunghoon. Not Yunie, ew.”
Mah?
“Because… because… I just do. He’s so… he’s so not like… you know. Heeseung.”
Your cat stiffens on your lap at the mention of your ex’s name. You laugh to yourself, knowing that there’s no one in this world she despises more than him.
“He’s not… he actually cares about me. He doesn’t have to tell me; I don’t even have to ask him if he does. I see it now. And it’s different from how he cares about the boys. I know it’s not just because I’m the only girl. I’ve seen the way he treats other girls. So… he probably doesn’t like Jimin, huh?”
Jiji perks up at the mention of her full government name, but then looks at you as if to say, are you fucking stupid?
“Yeah, I am, haven’t you noticed? I talk to you all the fucking time.”
Aaow.
“No, I don’t just like him because I get preferential treatment. I just—he never does anything to stress me out. I know he considers my feelings, I mean, fuck, he always tells Jaeyunie and Jungwonie to stop making fun of me when we’re hanging out, and, like, he’s always doing shit for me without me having to ask him or even hint at it. He just… he does it because he wants to? And being around him makes me calm. And he’s strong. And he’s kind, and he doesn’t brag about all the nice fucking things he does for everyone, for me… And… and…”
You lose your momentum as your face begins to sting, tears welling up in your eyes. You can hear the pain in Sunghoon’s voice when he said he’d “always just be one of your dogs” echoing in your head.
“And he doesn’t lie.”
Lying is something you’ve always had a hard time stomaching. As a child, you were taught that it was better to tell the truth and be punished once than to get caught in a lie and get punished twice. You don’t feel good when you lie. Not even when they’re little white lies, like the one you told Hyunjin about Jungwon being sick when you’d flaked on your date with him.
So when you’d found out that Kim Sunoo, Jungwon’s best friend since literal birth, had been helping Heeseung hide his secret relationship with Sunoo’s own cousin, Chaewon—and had been accepting money from Heeseung to help him keep that secret—you lost your fucking mind.
You’d been through everything with your boyfriend. You abandoned your family for him. You moved to a new city with him. You slept on the floor of a shitty apartment for months with him, while Jungwon was stuck in the dorms of his university with three other roommates. You took home leftovers from the restaurant you worked at all throughout college to feed yourself and your brother.
All of that which you endured, just to find out that everything was a lie.
Heeseung didn’t love you as much as he said he did. Because if he did, he would never have gone behind your back with someone else for months and had the nerve to kiss you with the same mouth he used to lie to you.
Sunghoon doesn’t lie, you tell yourself.
He’s not him, he’s not him, he’s not him.
And it’s a good thing. It’s a very good thing.
Sunghoon, for as long as you’ve known him, always keeps his promises. But you also hope that he breaks that last promise he made to you.
You don’t make any appearance at the next race, which is a week later. You purposefully ignore the group chat when they ask you where you are, if you’re coming to watch Riki beat Shotaro and get his revenge for the last time they’d raced against each other.
They get the message—or lack thereof—loud and clear, and leave you alone. You’re grateful that they don’t pry, although Jaeyun texts you separately to scold you about “making Hoonie sad”. You reply to him with the middle finger emoji, even though you know he’s right. For once, at least.
You get texts from Jimin, Soyeon, and Aeri in the racer girls’ group chat, all of them pouting about how you’re not going to see Jimin and Soyeon race against each other in their newly-modified cars. You apologize and wire Aeri a million Won, telling her to place a bet on your behalf for Riki to win in his race. You stop replying when Jimin and Soyeon get on your ass for not being able to choose between who between the two of them would win.
Minjeong had said something to you at work a couple days ago that made your stomach not be able to stop hurting since. Because she’s the most neutral-territory friend you have, you told her exactly what happened between you and Sunghoon, not sparing any detail—not even the thing he’d said to you that made you feel like a monster.
“You can’t build a new house with the bricks from the last one and expect it to be different.”
She’d said it so casually, like she’d read it off the subject line off the first email in her inbox, but it struck you so hard, hammering in what Jay told you the first night you met Sunghoon. To stop taking out your pain on every man that tried to come your way after Heeseung.
In your defense, again, it wasn’t like they were truly serious about you, anyways. Except Sunghoon, who refused to play your games and refused to flirt back with you whenever you’d try to make a pass at him.
It was your automatic distrust of him that brought you here, sulking at home, feeling helpless beyond your control. What made it worse was that Sunghoon definitely knew why you are the way you are, what with Jaeyun’s big fat ginormous mouth being unable to stop itself from spilling all the gory details of your past to him before you two had even met.
There’s a knock at your door. You find that odd; everyone should be out on the road right about now. You check your friends’ locations on your phone to see who could possibly be in your building right now.
You see Sunghoon’s contact photo right above the glowing blue dot that signifies where you are.
“Fuck,” you mutter.
“Y/N?” he calls out, muffled by the thick wood of your front door. You turn to Jji, who is looking at you curiously.
“Go, bedroom.”
Obediently, your cat runs to your room, and you can tell she uses her back legs to kick it shut behind her by the way it closes softly. It’s a trick that Jungwon and Riki spent an entire week of their summer vacation last year teaching her to do, and this is the first time it’s ever been useful.
You check yourself in the mirror in the entryway to make sure you look at least somewhat presentable. You’re wearing Aeri’s light pink sweatpants and a massive white t-shirt you’re pretty sure Riki left in your car once and completely forgot about. You shrug. It’ll have to do.
You open the door. Your voice comes out harsher than you intend it to. “What are you doing here, Sunghoon?”
The man flinches almost imperceptably, but the glimpse of it still has your heart twisting in your chest. “I wanted to say that I’m sorry I hurt you. It’s not a question of if I hurt you or not with what I said, because I know I did.”
You purse your lips, trying to process the fact that he’s apologizing to you without you having to prompt him for it. “Oh…”
He continues shakily. “I realized that I didn’t tell you the truth. The full truth. I like you, I really do. Like, not just as a friend, you know. I like you like… that. Fuck, sorry, I’ve never had to do this before.”
You smile at him softly, looking up at him. The light in the hallway illuminates the crown of his head like a halo, making him look more ethereal than he usually is. “Never?”
“Yeah, never. It’s usually the other way around, but I caved this time.” He sighs. “You’re a special girl. You don’t know what you’ve done to me.”
You shrug. “Oh, I think I have some idea.”
“Meaning?”
“I thawed you out, didn’t I?”
“Yeah, you really did. So—”
“Just come in,” you say, stepping aside to make room for him. “Sorry, I don’t have anything to offer you besides water or strawberry milk, but we can go raid Jay’s fridge. I have a key.”
He laughs. “That’s okay. I can order takeout for us.”
“What’s behind your back?”
He holds up a bundle wrapped in clean white paper. “I brought these for you. They’re not, um… they’re not really ‘I’m sorry’ flowers so much as they are ‘will you go out on a date with me?’ flowers.”
“Roses,” you muse, taking the bouquet from him. The arrangement is simple yet stunning, with various shades of muted pink that you realize are quite similar to the color of your Supra. “How original.” You pause, your voice softening. “But thank you, though, really. They’re beautiful.”
Sunghoon chuckles. “I wanted to get you lilies, but I learned that they’re toxic to cats.”
You stare at him for a moment, dumbfounded. He’s so considerate, he even thought of that. Is there anything that he doesn’t think about? Is this what he does when he zones out? “Who told you that I have a cat?”
“You mentioned it a few times,” he answers softly, like he’s reminding you to breathe. “Like that one time Riki made us take him to the arcade and spent too much money trying to win the stuffed… whatever that was from the claw machine.”
“Hm. I did, huh?”
“Yeah... So can I see it?”
“My cat? That’s a little forward, don’t you think? Aren’t we moving too fast?”
“Your pet cat, you brat.” His grin is wide, though, as he looks down at you adoringly.
“Oh! Oh, yeah, duh.” You take your phone out and swipe through your camera roll until you come across a picture of your white ragdoll cat, her pretty blue eyes staring at you much in the same manner that Sunghoon is right now. “This is her. Her name’s Jimin… erm, yeah, like the one we know… but I call her Jiji.”
“She’s cute… she kinda looks like you, hm? Is she not here right now?” he asks, scanning your living room. “Is she okay?”
“Oh, I sent her to my room before I answered the door—she doesn’t really like guys except for Wonie and Riki but I think it’s because she thinks they’re her servants. And, uh, also, I don't know if you're okay with cats.”
“Ah. I like cats, don’t worry. I’d love to meet her if that’s okay with you.”
“She might scratch you, though. Just a warning.”
“Yeah, that’s okay. You’d bandage me up, though, right?” When he smiles at you reassuringly, your heart thrums. You don't hear any innuendo in his voice, nothing that suggests that he expects something more from you. Turning away to hide your blushing face, you mumble a “yes” and make a beeline to your room to retrieve Jiji.
You get to the door and open it. She’s standing right in front of you, looking at you expectantly, as if she's asking you where Sunghoon is.
“In the living room,” you answer. You’re talking to your fucking cat. What’s new? Jiji struts right past you, her tail flicking against your ankles, and trots to the living room.
You follow her from a distance and watch as she pauses in front of Sunghoon, who extends a hand down for her to sniff at.
“Hello, Jiji,” he says softly. “Nice to meet you.”
The cat chirps at him, and your eyes widen. Usually, she greets males (mostly your ex and his friend) other than your boys with something akin to a hiss that sounds like slicing someone’s tires open. Sometimes she swats at them, claws out and everything. But she hesitates for a second before butting her little head into Sunghoon’s palm, eyes closed and purring up a storm much like the way she does when she wants you to give her a treat.
“Wow,” you remark. “She likes you. A lot.”
Sunghoon hums in agreement before saying, “Yeah. Wonder what her mommy thinks of me, though. And if she’ll go on a date with me.”
You blush yet again. He’s certainly dialing up the charm tonight. Mustering up the courage to flirt back, you reply, “I think… yeah, her mommy likes you too. And I think she will go out with you.”
“Mm.” He pets Jiji’s head, scratching between her ears which prompts your cat to roll over and expose her soft belly to him for him to rub. Whore, you think to yourself, as if you wouldn’t have done the same thing. “That’s good. I’m glad. Actually—scratch that. I’m relieved.”
By now you’re very well-acquainted to the way he speaks, straight to the point without very much embellishing in his sentences. At least it’s not hard to guess what he’s thinking. He doesn’t talk with the intent to deceive or play games, and, quite frankly, you adore that about him.
“I don’t just want you to care about me. I want you to let me care about you,” he says suddenly, looking up at you with round, sparkling eyes. He’s being forthcoming and earnest. Enthusiasm suits him well, you think. It makes his face look younger, softer, happier. “I want to earn your trust. I want you to feel safe with me.”
“I already do, though,” you reply, voice quiet as if you don’t want to jinx it somehow.
He gives you a nod of acknowledgement. “I know. But I want to be the one you come to for everything. For anything at all.”
“But—”
“You’d never be a burden to me,” he adds. “You couldn’t, even if you tried.”
There’s still enough time for you to go watch the final event of tonight’s race, the showdown between Riki and Shotaro. You hurriedly fix your hair and throw on a jacket, not caring about how your outfit looks because, frankly, you’re not interested in showing off tonight. You know for certain now that the only person whose attention you’ve wanted has been yours all along.
When you arrive, you can see that the Enigma boys are all circled around what you assume is Riki’s GT-R, only because you can see the underglow bouncing off everyone’s shoes. Leave it to your youngest to be annoying as usual.
You get out of Sunghoon’s car and head over to them, him following closely behind you. You pinch Jaeyun’s forearm and he immediately steps to the side to let you through so you can see what’s going on.
The engine hood is up, and you can see someone’s legs sticking out from under the car.
“What’s going on?” you ask no one in particular.
“Well… Riki fucking forgot to change his oil today, and the jack broke halfway, so none of us can fit under there… except Ning,” Jungwon answers.
“Ning?” you repeat.
“Yeah. The girl I’ve been seeing…” he mumbles. “You know, the one from school.”
Your heart drops at the idea that you’ve been so caught up in your own angst that you haven’t bothered to keep up with anyone else’s life, especially your own brother’s. “Oh. I see. She knows cars, huh?”
“Well,” Riki shrugs. “I guess. Jungwonie-hyung gave her the worst instructions on how to change this shitbox’s oil, and she’s doing it just fine, so she must be smart.”
Before Jungwon can even reach Riki, Sunghoon grabs him by the collar of his shirt, holding him back. “Chill out, bro.”
Jungwon glares at the taller man. “Hey, just because my sister thinks you’re hot doesn’t mean—”
“Good lord,” Jay groans. “Can we please have five minutes of peace so I can start this race? I want to go home already. I can feel my bed calling me.”
“Yeah,” Sunghoon snickers. “It’s calling you to wash the damn sheets, you slob.”
You bite your lip to keep yourself from laughing. Shaking your head, you approach Ning, who’s just rolled out from underneath the GT-R.
“Surprised you didn’t go blind in there,” you say, helping her up. “Riki’s lights are no joke.”
She smiles at you, shaking her head. “Actually, it helped, I could barely see anything down there, it was all covered in brake dust.”
This makes everyone burst out into laughter, mocking Riki for poorly maintaining his car. You roll your eyes, taking the wrench from Ning. You turn to Sunghoon.
“Hoon, can you help me with this? I think we’re gonna need more than an oil change to win tonight.”
“Hey!” Riki exclaims. “The fuck’s that supposed to mean?”
“Language, young man,” you snap back at him before looking at Sunghoon. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
“Headlight air intake?” he asks, a smile forming on his plush lips.
You grin. “Headlight air intake.”
“Oh, you guys are officially fucking crazy,” Jay whistles, admiring your handiwork when you’re done. With Sunghoon’s help, you’d removed one of Riki’s precious LED headlights to allow more airflow into the engine, enabling him to push the car harder without fear of overheating. “Poor Taro isn’t gonna know what hit him.”
“This is legitimately worse than the time Y/N Viper-swapped her Supra,” Jaeyun giggles, clapping his hands together in glee. “Ooh, everyone’s so fucked. They’re lucky she doesn’t drive with a missing headlight, too.”
“Don’t give her any ideas,” Sunghoon jokes. “She can barely see at night as it is.”
“Oh,” you flirt back, “Is that why I think you’re more handsome in the daytime?”
Riki and Jungwon fake gagging noises behind you, but you smile.
“We’re making it out of the hood tonight, boys!” Riki hollers from his position at the finish line. Jungwon is beside him, at the wheel of his 350z. To Jungwon’s other side is Shotaro, looking annoyed. You can see him glare a hole into the back of Riki’s head as he walks behind your brother and his friend.
“Since when was Itaewon considered the hood?” you call back at him. Everyone laughs.
You see Jaeyun whisper something into Jimin’s ear, and she giggles. Meanwhile, Jay, awkward as he can be sometimes, plants a kiss on Aeri’s forehead. “Is it fucking cuffing season or something?” you mutter under your breath, thinking it was low enough that no one hears your annoyance.
“Us next,” Sunghoon responds cooly from behind you, draping an arm over your shoulder. “How’s that sound?”
“Holy shit,” Riki gasps, dramatically putting a hand over his mouth. “Sunghoon-hyung’s—”
“Got some serious rizz,” Jungwon finishes. “And if it weren’t directed towards noona, I’d cheer him on.”
Jay rolls his eyes. “Shut up, Won, you act like you haven’t wanted them together since you first met him.”
Jungwon pouts cutely and shrugs. “Yeah, yeah. It’s more fun to pretend to be an opp, though.”
You glare at your brother. “Wanna see a real opp? I’ll tell Ning that you like to—”
“Don’t you fucking dare.” He turns to Sunghoon. “Hyung, did you know that noona sometimes drools in her sleep?”
“I do.”
“WHAT?” the boys chorus like they’re in a cartoon.
Sunghoon looks at them with pure curiosity. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I know? She fell asleep and drooled all over my arm when we watched Interstellar for the fifth time.”
“Sunghoon!” you squeal. “You’re not supposed to tell them that happened!”
“Wait, fifth?” Jaeyun asks, hands sassily placed on his hips. “We’ve only watched it four times.”
You and Sunghoon exchange a look, your face heating up. “Well, uh…”
“Nevermind that,” Jay interrupts, his arm around Aeri’s waist. “We know you two hang out without us. Jaeyunie’s just fucking with you.”
“Yeah,” Riki agrees. “In fact, we want you guys to hang out without us.”
You look at Ning, rolling your eyes. “See what you’re getting into?”
She gives you a warm smile. “I don’t mind.”
park sunghoon: We’re still on for our date tonight, yes?
you: yeah! what are we doing?? i can pick a spot if you don’t have anything in mind
park sunghoon: None of that from you, princess. Just be ready by 7, I’ll pick you up. Our reservation is at 7:30. I already made sure you’d like the restaurant and you can wear that black dress you bought last week.
… Princess?
you: how…?
park sunghoon: Well, I know what food you like because we’ve gone out to eat so many times. And also, I saw you post the dress on your story when you tried it on in the fitting room, so I figured you got it.
park sunghoon: Before you get upset thinking I’m controlling what you wear, I’m not. I know you have a hard time choosing your outfits (even though they’re all very nice) and the dress looked lovely on you.
He’s trying to make your life easier. You smile to yourself, face going hot. You bite your knuckles to keep yourself from screaming at your desk.
you: oh… okay!
you: i’ll see you later hoon :)
park sunghoon: Can’t wait. Have a great day at work, beautiful.
God, you want to throw your phone across the office with how giddy you are. You finish work early by skipping your lunch break, and you go home at 2:30 in the afternoon, thanks to Minjeong excitedly whisper-yelling at you that she’ll cover for you and to “Go get some dick, girl!” and smacking your ass as you scurried to the elevator. When you arrive home, you immediately run to your bathroom and turn on the shower. You’ve got music blasting from your speaker while you wash your hair and shave and scrub down your entire body. You’re smiling at yourself in the mirror while you dry your hair and do your skincare routine, and you’ve still got a good four hours to get all dressed up for your first real, official date in years.
i'm done reading chels' baby, ssv !!! very smooth reading, dialogues on point (it's chels, c'mon), characters' personality? a work of art, so well done. from the latter point to descriptions, this is my workbook.
found family trope is always a comforting blanket, definitely something i've grown accustomed to with chels over the year and it will never stop amazing me.
sunghoon here is gentle and soft-spoken. i care for him, i'd keep him safe forever PLEASE
ꕥ SINK MY TEETH IN YOU ⸝⸝⸝ six different scenarios in which the enhypen members are bloodthirsty otherworldly creatures !
⚠︎ smut. mdni. blood, scratching, usage of claws, biting, blood drinking. the following drabbles might contain dub-con and non-con (biting) content, read the warnings for each. total wc 4k. ⸻ rules ⋆ m.list
NIA ⸻ happy halloween my lovelies :3 this is a little rushed bc og plan didn't make it in time but oh well! this is inspired by guts, written by my beloved @karinasbaby
Usually you do first dates differently, sure. But rarely are they this good, so maybe it's the right way, afterall.
You met Heeseung on Tinder of all places, but from day one you liked how no bullshit and straight to the point he was. Not looking for anything serious, just like you. Not there to waste time on pointless dates and calls when all he wants is to fuck, just like you. And into… vampire role play? Okay, not exactly like you, but intriguing enough, and with Halloween around the corner, why the hell not.
He threw you over his shoulder the second you laid out some ground rules and a safe word, like you weighted absolutely nothing. 'Uh, I lift,' he'd said when you asked him about his strength, and you'd left it at that. If any other slightly off putting detail came into the picture, you failed to pick up on it, busy as you are with his cock down your throat.
"Just like that, darling." Heeseung's head lurches back when you swirl your tongue around his—abnormally cold?–cock. A huge thing, by the way. You struggled to take it in initially, helping yourself with your hands, but Heeseung just pushed your head down on it. And honestly? You liked it more than you thought you would, a little too much, even.
His mouth is hung open in pleasure, hyper realistic fangs poking his bottom lip, and you helplessly squeeze your thighs together at the though of how they would feel like running down your skin and poking your thighs.
"Use your teeth a little, sweet thing."
What?
You try to pull off of Heeseung, but his palm keeps your head in place, his hips slowly rolling into your mouth when you make a confused noise.
"Just graze it with your teeth, slightly—fuck yeah, mhh gonna cum if you keep this up." Heeseung's moans are so sweet, so sinful the sound of them alone is enough to have you sneak a hand between your thighs and just press it there, desperate for anything.
The request might be a little odd, but for the noises he's making? You'd do anything. So you keep working your mouth on him, a mix of tongue and the faintest ghost of your teeth here and there, until he slowly turns to putty in your hands. His palm doesn't force your head down his length anymore, instead it just rests there, allowing you to move however you want. You pull off slowly, licking his cock until you reach his tip, wrapping your lips around it suckling, ignoring how his hips chase your mouth when you swirl your tongue across his slit, metallic precum on your taste buds.
Sticky, you feel so sticky and damp between your thighs, barely thinking and only acting on instinct, biting down gently on his tip. His hips shoot forward aggressively, a downright pornographic moan leaving him on contact, and this time he takes his cock away from you. "Need to cum, now. Wanna cum with you."
He's harsh in his movements, dragging you up and along with him on your bed, you underneath him and hips already bruising slightly because the sheer force in his grip, like nothing you've ever experienced before, almost unnatural. He hovers on you, both your hands firm in his grip above your head, and his eyes clouded with a lustful tint, gleaming dark red in the low dimmed light of the room. His fangs seem to only have gotten bigger, sharper, and it makes you want to feel them on you even more. The hand on your hip slides town to your wet pussy, while his mouth moves to your neck, the weight of his teeth on it sending jolts of pleasure through you before he even pokes them in a little.
"Silly, silly human," Heeseung whispers, his fingers and teeth both plunging into you at the same time.
ꕥ PARK JONGSEONG
⚠︎ vampire!jay x vampire!reader, very vague rivals to ?, p in v, jealousy, mention of mating rituals.
"Letting other men touch you, human scum at that," Jay says into your mouth, poking your lips with his sharp canines and licking at the wound right after to close it, just enough to hurt, not enough to give you both what you really want.
Jay is a terribly patient man, it's been one of his best traits for as long as vampires like you have walked the Earth, you however, think it's his worst. Always so calculating, moving so damn slow all the time like he wants to make full use of the eternity he's granted, living his centuries playing chess and no one else around him even knows with whom. You're rash, unpredictable, bored out of your mind half the time and chasing for a high you haven't felt since you were human the rest of it.
It's no surprise you two never got quite along, and yet, there's an explicable pull between you, one you like to poke every chance you get, while Jay pretends not to feel it at all. But here you are, after decades of push and pull, and it's him closing the distance this time.
He laps at your mouth, grip on your thigh deadly and sharp claws digging into your skin while his cock splits you open with every thrust, the man fucking you nothing like the composed Jay you know and love to hate. "I thought you had higher standards than that, allowing the first warm blooded pretty boy hold you like that—"
"You do not—mh. Get to tell me who should touch me—" you moan between thrusts, fangs itching with the need to sink into something, to sink into Jay's neck and claim him as yours in a way you've never dared speak out loud.
He chuckles, dark and humorless against your neck, mouth open to lick the salt off your skin. You feel the way he's holding back, bloodlust and need oozing from every pore of his body, but his fangs are retracted almost all the way in to deny you, and in the process, denying himself too. "I think I have every right to."
The complaint on your lips fails to be delivered when his hips slow down to a grind, his pelvis rubbing onto your clit with every circle he draws, his mouth dropping to lap at your collarbones. "You had so much to say all this time, is some cock all it takes to make you shut the fuck up?"
You whimper, the usage of such improper language coming from Jay of all people making your blood feel warm for the first time in centuries, and he grins against your skin. His fangs finally poke you, your hips lifting into his hold at the sudden sensation as you try to fuck yourself onto him at the pace previously set. You want more, you need more, and it's starting to make you delirious.
He scratches the valley of your breasts with a fang, licking the tiniest amount of blood collecting into droplets along the cut back up, hips stuttering into your heat at the sweet taste. Having another vampire's blood is not something to be done on a whim, it's a proof of trust, of a bond that cannot be broken, and despite it all, you want nothing more than for Jay to have you completely, in every single way he can. That's you, the one to never think of the consequences? But Jay? He's supposed to be the one to stop, grab his coat and leave so both of you don't fall into a trap you'll regret down the line.
He looks up at you, pale lips faintly coated in red, and he's shaking. "Tell me to stop. You'll never see me again." He swallows hard, Adam's apple bobbing deliciously. "Tell me you want it, please."
ꕥ SIM JAEYUN
⚠︎ yandere!jake, dub-con, blood drinking, not so dry humping, mentions of reader going unconscious, aphrodisiac-like venom, transactional relationship, pet play kinda near the end, overstim
You live a pretty comfortable life, all things considered. No need to worry about living expenses, Jake's got it! No need to worry about annoying coworkers because you actually don't need to work at all. Honestly speaking, you don't do much of anything except be pretty, hang out with your friends, buy cute things with money that's not yours… and let Jake feed off of you every once in a while.
You know it sounds crazy, that's why you keep it to yourself, but the arrangement has always worked in your favor as far as you're concerned, and getting fed from wasn't as painful as one would think. Jake has his ways of making it extra pleasurable.
"Your pretty human pussy gets so fucking when when I do this," Jake hums, lip caught between his teeth and his entire bottom face drenched in your blood. He's got you in his lap, both of you naked and rubbing onto each other desperately because he just loves when it gets messy like this. The sheets underneath your bodies are soaked with your essence, his precum, and gushes of your blood he couldn't catch. His cock rests heavy between your folds, his hips snapping up to rub his tip against your clit with every drop of blood he licks off your neck. "Tastes like a dream, sweetness."
You're rarely ever coherent after the first few bites, but when Jake wants to really have fun, he pumps you with enough venom to make you needier and hornier, but not nearly enough to turn you. It's actually one of his favorite things in the world, how wet and messy and downright fucking dumb you go for him when he does it. He reserves it for special occasions though, otherwise your poor weak human body wouldn't be able to take it, but he thinks it makes it that much more hot.
He sinks his fangs into your neck again, mouth agape to swallow all you give him, his cock throbbing painfully against your cunt. Pleasure shoots through you, the bite sending you tumbling straight to another orgasm, the nth that day. You hold onto his shoulders as hard as you can, manicured nails scratching and gripping to grown yourself to anything as you trash and writhe in his hold.
Jake's not anywhere near to being full though, and he hasn't even put his cock inside you yet, so he just keeps your hips down and licks all the blood that's dribbled from your wounds to your tits, swirling his tongue around it even when you're begging him for a break.
He pokes your nipple with his teeth, and laughs when you yelp in pain. You're so cute, so endearing, so fragile. So human. And he wants to break you. He looks a mess, blood everywhere and pupils blown out, gaze crazed like he's going through the highest high he'll ever get, one he never wants to put an end to.
"I should keep you like this forever," he says, and if you had it in you to even understand the words coming out of his mouth, you'd be worried about how serious he sounds. "Keep you forever like a little pet I can just take out of a cage and feed on. Drink up all of your blood and eat your cute little pussy until you're so dumb you'll even wear a collar for me if I ask you to."
ꕥ PARK SUNGHOON
⚠︎ bf!hoon, period sex, oral (f!rec), period blood slurping well yes
You spent the last couple of days upset with Sunghoon, and being on your period made it worse. Well, your period is the reason you're mad at him in the first place, because despite having just started dating, he had proven himself to be the most thoughtful man you'd ever met.
And even though you two had sworn to take things slow and easy, you ended up having lots of sex right off the bat.
So imagine your frustration when you get your period for the first time while seeing him, and he just seems to have disappeared into thin air. Excuses upon excuses as to why he cannot possibly make time to see you this week, even when you need him the most. So odd, coming from him, but you guess that's what you get for trusting a man so early on.
Was Sunghoon using you for sex this entire time? It feels extremely silly to believe, because he out of everyone has no need to play someone for some physical satisfaction when he can get it plenty elsewhere, with no strings attached. People throw themselves at his feet for a conversation with him, let alone to get into his bed. But if not that, why disappear exactly this week?
You still don't have a real answer, but it's definitely not that, because after a few very upset texts revealing how you felt about his lack of presence, he came to you freakishly fast, and put you exactly where you are right now.
Face down, ass up on the bed, no underwear on and a little blood dripping down your inner thigh. While he mouths at them, so no, it cannot possibly be that, or that he's somehow repulsed by your period… turns out it's quite the opposite?
"Hoonie," you whine into the bedsheets, flailing your arm behind you to search for his dark hair. He grabs your hand in his and holds it on your hip instead, fingers intertwining and his thumb rubbing soothing circles on your skin. "You don't have to—"
Sunghoon gives you small, playful bite on one of your inner thighs, and this time, unlike any other, his teeth seem sharper, stronger. You yelp, body jolting forward, but he keeps you up easily. "I wanna. Sorry for making you worry your pretty little head over this, I'm such a bad boyfriend."
You can feel yourself grow wetter by the second, especially with his warm voice so close to your core, even though you're so fucking embarrassed at the same time. He licks up some of the wetness smeared on your thigh, and you don't know wether it's the needy slick that's pouring out of you, or blood.
"But I will make it up to you." He spreads your cunt open with his fingers, giving it a long, slow lick with his flattened tongue. He moans into it, loud and guttural, then pushes it inside your hole and fucks you with it like he would with his cock.
"You taste so fucking good," Sunghoon groans from behind you, the sounds of him slurping your blood up so obscene you don't know if you want to cry from shame or fuck yourself back on his tongue. He licks it all up, explores every single crevice of you like he has never done before. Sunghoon has always been a pro eater, it's no secret. But this? It's almost like you being on your period is a source of pleasure for him.
He pulls away from you for a moment, biting your thighs here and there as he breathes so heavily you'd think he just finished running a marathon, his fingernails—sharper than you remember them being—digging into your skin painfully.
You crane your neck to get a look at him, in all his beauty with your red essence smeared on his pale skin, mouth agape and eyes closed like he's trying to regain control of himself and struggling too.
And… are you seeing things or are his fangs longer and thicker than usual?
ꕥ KIM SUNOO
⚠︎ club owner!sunoo, employee!reader, yes i have a thing for power imbalance when it comes to sunoo thank you very much. brief cutting to draw blood, oral (f!rec), food play but it's blood
A lot of the club scene is actually run by vampires, night activities for nocturnal creatures, and most of the best spots in your city are owned by the same seven bloodthirsty creatures. They move as a pack, make decisions together and while you've caught sight of some of them a few times, the only one you've ever talked to is Sunoo.
And it appears he might have taken a liking to you.
"Gorgeous." He swirls the red liquid in the glass he's holding, walking slowly around you, a predator circling its prey. He's fully clothed, the coat nearly floor length and his hair perfectly slicked back as ever, while you're bare under his gaze, laid on his desk like a buffet spread. "The prettiest out of all of them."
You're not supposed to catch the attention of someone this important, you're a mere human bartender, hired to lure in even more vampires to these underground parties. Sunoo's always had particular tastes though, and you just happen to hit the spot.
He sits back on his chair, leaning into the velvety cushions as he takes in the sight of your perfect pussy displayed right in front of him. "I could keep you here as decoration, wouldn't hurt to look at something other than Heeseung's face sometimes." There's a small smirk tugging his lip, but you're more preoccupied with keeping your breathing even under his crushing presence. "Cute. Or—" He spills the cup full of blood on the floor, something as precious and as sought after by his fellow vampires, like it means nothing to him. Before you realize it, he scratches your side open with his sharp nails, until a trickle of blood pours out of you and into the empty cup. "Much better. You also have a purpose now."
Sunoo bends forward to lick your wound, closing it and then pressing a soft kiss right on it like he didn't cut you open himself. He brings the cup to his lips, wetting them just enough that he has to dart his tongue out to get a taste, and when he does, his eyes roll back into his head for a split second. "Just like I thought."
You don't dare speak, don't dare ask for anything, but you don't have to, because the way your body reacts to him is enough. A little puddle of slick rests on the desk, under your pussy, and your thighs gleam under the red tinted lights.
Sunoo clicks his tongue. "Should I leave you like this? Jerk myself off in front of you while I feast on your blood from a glass?" He chuckles, amused by the way your eyes widen. "But of course not, that wouldn't be very kind of me now, would it?"
He scoots closer, slowly spilling some of your blood on your inner thighs, before lurching forward to lick it off of you. He mouths at your skin, spread lips and tongue cleaning you as easily as he dirtied you, his eyes never leaving the bounce of your tits with every sharp movement you make. You moan when his fangs graze your skin, and he slowly eases you into getting you where he wants you: begging him to have a bite.
The glass makes quick contact with your mound, ice cold against your burning skin, as more of your own blood pours on you, this time right on your pussy, from your clit dripping lower until it forms rivulets following different patterns. Sunoo catches them in his mouth immediately, not allowing a single drop to his his desk. He laps you up, slips his tongue into your heat for one thrust and cleans all there is to clean until he doesn't know which essence of yours is sweeter. His mouth is bloody, his fangs too, and he presses gentle kisses right on your clit, enamored with your needy sounds.
The chair screeches against the floor when he stands up to hover over you. He looks into your eyes, fingers lifting your chin up, then presses another kiss, still soft, right on your lips, the metallic taste of yourself tinting your senses an ever deeper shade of red.
ꕥ YANG JUNGWON
⚠︎ vampire!won x hunter!reader, enemies to ?, they're exes, it's angsty, hunter x prey dynamics, fingering, implied noncon biting
A single step in the wrong direction can be life threatening when it comes to your line of work. You, have already taken several, with no chance to turn back.
"Not much of a threat now, huh?" Jungwon crawls over you, wicked grin on his otherworldly beautiful features. He yelps, mocking you and your injured leg, grabbing it and squeezing right where the wound is, blood oozing out and covering the back of his hand in it. "How funny. You're the prey now." He licks your blood off his skin, making it a point to show you just how much he enjoys its taste, and somewhere deep inside you, a sight you should be horrified by, makes your pulse rush right to your stomach.
Want.
But you're not supposed to want a vampire, you're supposed to kill them, eradicate their existence completely.
Images of you and Jungwon, stills of before he got turned—and even after, as much as you hate to admit that to yourself—play in your mind. Happy ones, celebrations and achievements, and nasty, filthy ones, those you not dare speak about. You shake your head to stop them, and when you look at the man in front of you again, your heart clenches in your chest. Ghostly complexion, claws sharp and curved, no warmth you recognize behind his eyes. Turning made Jungwon into a shell of the man you once loved.
Something in his gaze shifts, you almost recognize it but it's gone too soon, and you barely register the way his face inches closer and closer to yours, until his nose brushes the tip of yours and your breath meets stillness where once it met warmth. You don't fight it when he closes the gap, your hands flying to pull on his hair the second his lips meet yours. His fangs dig into your skin but you allow yourself to not care, it always ends like it, no matter how many times you say it won't happen again.
The clothes get torn off your bodies and you don't even know who took off what, you just know that Jungwon's lips are on yours, and as long as your eyes are closed, things are back to being what they once were for at least a little longer. Your wound doesn't hurt, and you know he healed it with his bullshit powers like he always does. Bleeding out on the concrete after a vampire run in would be easier on your conscience than Jungwon's hands slipping between your thighs to palm your heat, and you letting him.
You should hate him and everything he represents, but you don't. And it eats away at you every fucking day.
You gasp against Jungwon's lips when a finger enters you, then another right beside it and you make the mistake of looking into his eyes as he slowly fucks you open on his digits. It's not bloodlust, it's not hunger in his eyes, something far worse you don't want to name. He picks up his pace when you close yours eyes again, resting your head on the hard cold wall behind you.
"Please, cum for me, baby," Jungwon whispers with his head pressed to yours, and when you do, falling apart for him almost on command like he has personally trained your body to do, a tear running down your cheek along with your wetness coating his wrist, he lowers his mouth to your exposed neck, lip quivering and voice shaky. "I'm so sorry baby. I'm so fucking sorry," He speaks against your pulse point, nuzzling his head into it before letting his fangs completely show. "I miss you. Please forgive me."
contains: implied sex, threesome, suggestive more than anything
It's clear as the brightest sky how you're trying to put a patch on your liaison with rugby players Heeseung and Jake, to avoid facing reality by getting on your toes to hug that ex boyfriend of yours — a messy choice for a messy excuse.
Not a slipped foot, nor a rushed decision: in less than a week, you've found your feet in Heeseung and Jake's team's sector, partying at their district club like that has always been your scene; call them casualties — or don't — and two pairs of arms caught you in a delicious trap. For a long night.
You're born to create chaos. Going out of the rivals' district, making of their supporters your new friends and, on top of it, fucking two of the hottest teams' members, always on everyone's mouth for their excellent gameplay — being good-looking is also a big quality of them, and they won't let modesty ruin an exquisite night of alternative 'fun and games'.
Many think you're acting in spite of revenge after the breakup, but in all honesty you've always been curious of the so-called other side of the play-court.
Your playing pretend doesn't upset them; instead, it truly amuses them, as they observe you chirping around the guy from their respective side of the play court. Small hands — compared to theirs — closed around his biceps, eyes glinting of a subtle restlessness; they have learned a lot from the push and pull during your close encounter, which leads them to think that maybe, maybe, you feel it too, the ticklish sensation on your nape: the exact sensation you got from Jake's whispered encouragement while slotted inside your moist, eager pussy, while those hands — yours — were exploring their backs, climbing their chests as your ass was used for a proper leverage by Heeseung; your nails as authors of the indents of their own biceps, close to you enough to get warm from your erratic breath.
They created a rhythm, you followed with every fiber of your body, mind included. If the position allowed it to happen, you'd pour all your intent to meet their pistoning hips, while looking up at their sweaty face with glossy eyes, loud just as your strangled words were.
Your ex boyfriend won't ever meet the bar the two men have now set. Very, oh, very unfortunate. Your ego is now bruised, 'cause you fell into their arms with an overly excited passion, leaving the self-control on the dusty doormat of Heeseung's place. Nothing went unnoticed to them, it could've hardly happened: the next morning, reality hit you hard with full consciousness, as you were in bed with Jake, and Heeseung was in the kitchen whipping something up for breakfast. You may have left a sign on them — like the mark of your teeth on the younger's nose, where a scar from a game set proudly already — but it's hardly as rampageous as the heavy depth in your stomach. The consuming desire you were feeling right after waking up — as your full attention was on Jake and the glow around his face and large shoulders, kissed from the morning light — brought you to run out of the apartment through agitated motions. Red cheeks and frowning brows, the keys to your behavior.
But what can an eager spirit do when the desire is so strong? When the glass is almost completely full, and might spill in a second or two from the intense gaze of two pairs of eyes, from the memory of their respective scents, that heavenly meld together?
And so forth, you can try and fight the pull running through your body, however you already know how the night is going to end — when it is going to actually begin in worthy significance. Perhaps at Jake's place this time, without running away but diving even more in the warm, aphrodisiacal pair that Heeseung and Jake are.
contains: pornstar!caleb/bestfriend!reader, both of you are kinda drunk (not too much), pussy eating, recorded sex, & just pure smut sooo mdni!! i did proofread but i did this in basically a day so if you see some mistakes… LOOK AWAY!!!
porn★!caleb who always looks forward to that special time where you, his longtime best friend, comes over and stays at his place for a couple days. he values those rare moments where both your schedules are freed up at the same time, ready to spend as long as he can with favorite girl.
with you, he was more than his career, more than a pretty face with a big dick and a body that quickly skyrocketed him up the popularity scale in the industry. he was simply caleb, your bestie, and the takeout containers all over his coffee table that you sit on the floor together beside and a unimportant comedy movie playing in the background of your silly conversations, were just a few of the things to prove that true.
porn★!caleb who’s secretly and infallibly in love with you, so much so that his infatuation slowly began to trickle into his profession. nothing too obvious of course, but somehow, no matter who he fucked over the course of him finally acknowledging how deep his feelings ran, they always had to have some kind of physical trait that he could compare to you.
from body type, hair & eye color, the size of their tits, and the shape of their lips, if he was able to film a video with a woman that had any similarity to give him that illusion of what it would be like to see you in the way he had them, then he would. shamelessly, in fact. he got lost in it and performed his best, videos reaching scales he’s never massed.
that preference was made a nonnegotiable stipulation to be fulfilled for all future collaborations. a man like him had that privilege. and even if he knew none of the women could ever compare to what he fantasized the real experience to be, he’d selfishly take what he could get.
porn★!caleb loves when you start to let your mouth get loose the more small sips of wine you consume, touching him more than you already do and laughing harder at his corny jokes because of the subtle alcohol influence buzzing in your system. you’re more… bold, when you’re like this. he likes that. but tonight is showing to be something entirely different the more you ask him all kinds of questions that a 100% sober you would be far too shy to.
“is it… weird that i watch your videos sometimes?”
“does the sex feel as good as you make it seem?”
“i always wonder how you do what you do… with all those eyes on you.”
“i wish i had the experiences you have, y’know? i wanna know what it’s like sometimes.”
oh, how could he have been so blind?
porn★!caleb seems to be under the influence just as much as you are when his dick that twitches in his sweats starts to do all the thinking after your tipsy confessions. between his narrowed observing eyes that are glazed over with an unmistakable lust and a hardening cock, caleb’s body is on autopilot as he takes the chance to slide his palm along the curve of your jawline.
flickering between the mouth he’s imagined wrapped around him and the swell of your breasts beneath your tight night shirt, not an ounce hesitancy forms to stop him when you make the effort to meet him halfway.
porn★!caleb doesn’t know how he ended up in between your thighs so fast with your sleep shorts and panties completely disregarded, smiling into your dripping pussy when your back helplessly arches off of his expensive carpet and your nails dig into his tousled hair, but he doesn’t dare waste time to question it. not when you breathlessly call out his name and hypnotize him with every erotic cry when he sucks your swollen clit into his mouth.
“oh, pips… you could’ve just asked me,” he mumbles into your slick folds, burying his nose deep into your essence as he savors your addictive sweetness. he wants every single inch of you to be apart of him; every desire, fixation, secret, and confession. and he’ll take it from the source if he has to.
“gonna be good f’me? hm?” he hums into you, the vibrations leaving you blissfully numb with every flick of his skilled tongue to accompany them. “gonna let me show you how good it can get? how much better i’ll make it for you?”
porn★!caleb would confuse you when he stops tasting you in your attempt to hazily respond, licking up your juices that cling to his puffy lips while reaching into his pocket and retrieving his phone. the bright flash that covers your exposed form as a recording begins makes your eyes widen with surprise, but the lazy smile on your best friend’s face is enough to erase uncertainty.
“won’t show your face, pipsqueak. promise,” he assures, tone shaky with need as he raises your top to reveal the supple globes of your tits. he rolls your peaked nipples between his fingers, pinching the hardened nubs and spilling precum into his underwear like he has zero self-control with every whine you grace him with. he makes sure his phone doesn’t miss any of it.
“just need… fuck, you’re so pretty… need the proof that i was here.”
porn★!caleb would only ask you once if he can fuck you, promising that he’ll take care of you better than anyone you’ve ever watched him stick his dick inside of. he owes it to you, after all. and when your airy voice grants him that solid and unwavering “yes”, you’re shown in real time what the famous adult star caleb xia is capable of, what he’s known for.
with his pants haphazardly lowered, his thick cock that you’ve jealously seen him slide into “co-workers” in the quiet privacy of your bedroom, splits you open deliciously and it feels better than anything you’ve ever imagined it to be. in the span of your eyes rolling back from how thoroughly you’re filled, caleb took the small timeframe to prop up his phone so that he could be fully hands-on. he wasn’t wasting this opportunity.
“knew you’d feel g-good,” he sttutters, running his palm down the length of your jolting body from every deep thrust. “my best friend’s a little pervert, aren’t you pips? how long have you been watchin’ me, huh? touching this pretty pussy when you wished it was me doin’ it, filling her with my cum instead of someone who didn’t deserve it. hah… s-shit… s-shoulda been me… it’s gonna only be me from now on.”
“we’ll make our own movies, yeah?” you squeeze him uncontrollably, babbling senselessly every time you feel him prodding against your lower stomach from the inside. “you like that, don’t you? squeezin’ me so fuuuckin’ tight… mm, i do too. wanna be my little money maker?”
“yes… yesyes, please caleb… feel s’ good…” you wail, nails aimlessly scratching as his flexing biceps.
“y-you’re a natural for the camera, pips… you’ll let me post this, won’t you? let everyone see who owns this dick?”
you don’t know if you’re drunk off the liquor anymore or the man whose heavy balls slap against your ass when he relentlessly sinks back into your quivering pussy over and over and over again, but all that matters is that you’re hooked.
A/N: this… got way longer than i thought… i am not ashamed
contains: implied sex, threesome, suggestive more than anything
It's clear as the brightest sky how you're trying to put a patch on your liaison with rugby players Heeseung and Jake, to avoid facing reality by getting on your toes to hug that ex boyfriend of yours — a messy choice for a messy excuse.
Not a slipped foot, nor a rushed decision: in less than a week, you've found your feet in Heeseung and Jake's team's sector, partying at their district club like that has always been your scene; call them casualties — or don't — and two pairs of arms caught you in a delicious trap. For a long night.
You're born to create chaos. Going out of the rivals' district, making of their supporters your new friends and, on top of it, fucking two of the hottest teams' members, always on everyone's mouth for their excellent gameplay — being good-looking is also a big quality of them, and they won't let modesty ruin an exquisite night of alternative 'fun and games'.
Many think you're acting in spite of revenge after the breakup, but in all honesty you've always been curious of the so-called other side of the play-court.
Your playing pretend doesn't upset them; instead, it truly amuses them, as they observe you chirping around the guy from their respective side of the play court. Small hands — compared to theirs — closed around his biceps, eyes glinting of a subtle restlessness; they have learned a lot from the push and pull during your close encounter, which leads them to think that maybe, maybe, you feel it too, the ticklish sensation on your nape: the exact sensation you got from Jake's whispered encouragement while slotted inside your moist, eager pussy, while those hands — yours — were exploring their backs, climbing their chests as your ass was used for a proper leverage by Heeseung; your nails as authors of the indents of their own biceps, close to you enough to get warm from your erratic breath.
They created a rhythm, you followed with every fiber of your body, mind included. If the position allowed it to happen, you'd pour all your intent to meet their pistoning hips, while looking up at their sweaty face with glossy eyes, loud just as your strangled words were.
Your ex boyfriend won't ever meet the bar the two men have now set. Very, oh, very unfortunate. Your ego is now bruised, 'cause you fell into their arms with an overly excited passion, leaving the self-control on the dusty doormat of Heeseung's place. Nothing went unnoticed to them, it could've hardly happened: the next morning, reality hit you hard with full consciousness, as you were in bed with Jake, and Heeseung was in the kitchen whipping something up for breakfast. You may have left a sign on them — like the mark of your teeth on the younger's nose, where a scar from a game set proudly already — but it's hardly as rampageous as the heavy depth in your stomach. The consuming desire you were feeling right after waking up — as your full attention was on Jake and the glow around his face and large shoulders, kissed from the morning light — brought you to run out of the apartment through agitated motions. Red cheeks and frowning brows, the keys to your behavior.
But what can an eager spirit do when the desire is so strong? When the glass is almost completely full, and might spill in a second or two from the intense gaze of two pairs of eyes, from the memory of their respective scents, that heavenly meld together?
And so forth, you can try and fight the pull running through your body, however you already know how the night is going to end — when it is going to actually begin in worthy significance. Perhaps at Jake's place this time, without running away but diving even more in the warm, aphrodisiacal pair that Heeseung and Jake are.
the mention of tiger jay in your panther jake thing made my head spin 😵💫 just big, broad jay with tiger ears and a striped tail omg he’d treat his mate so well i just know it
oh you know it anon. he does exactly that.. tiger jay is SUCH a provider. he ticks all the boxes when it comes to being a solid, protective, caring mate he def has a spoiling habit too.
in his den you’re not allowed to step your feet down onto the floor if he hasn’t fed you breakfast in bed from his own hands. every single shower or bath that you take? must be taken with his chest pressed to your back and his arms around your hips. every single move that you take in his den his frame is a shadow behind you, he’s always there, always watching, always caring.
but it’s the cuddles that are ur favourite. he’ll place you in his lap, back against the headboard while his claws will gently run down your spine and your own hands would scratch at his striped ears till he purrs, so deeply and sweetly like you’re playing with his soul. and he would just wrap his patterned tail, fluffy and massive around your waist just to press you closer to him.
tiger jay is so possessive, but he does have the habit of showing off most def.
he would request and tailor the most jaw dropping dresses for you in events, ones that display and cinch all of your curves just for the other hybrids & humans to gawk at and then he’d make sure that his hand never leaves your waist (or your ass sometimes) throughout the whole event.
when outside his hand would constantly be tangled with yours, fingers intertwined and his thumb always rubbing soothing circles in your skin the second he feels a spike in your scent.
he’s so attentive, so focused, every single one of his senses are attuned to you completely. you’re the centre star and he’s restlessly orbiting around you like it’s his job, it’s his birthright it’s what he was born for.
Because you know what? At the end of the day it's Jungwon and Jungwon only. Like my inner child is having a crush on him like we're in 1st grade. And I know you're cooking something AMAZING for us about Feline!Jungwon but in my head I imagine him as a Cheetah! So fast, smooth and agile. Tanned skin, all muscle and ALWAYS GETS WHAT HE WANTS. Like reader for example. The apple of his eye, his muse for when he goes hunting. He comes back home all sweaty and broad shoulders. Too big for his clothes, too big for this room, adrenaline thru his body and guess what? He needs his small little reader to calm him down. Agressive at first, fangs and claws bared and his eyes are wild, pupils wide and moving from side to side. But reader is so so brave and accepting of her Cheetah, kissing his sweaty skin, whispering praises while looking into his eyes and kissing his vainy hand, telling him how safe he makes her feel and that she isn't scared of him - she love him the way he is. IM SORRY THIS IS SO LONG OMG BUT YOU INSPIRE ME SIS WHAT CAN I DO ITS YOU BABES😭😭😭
mature content.
anon … u rlly just planted a bomb in my inbox and left HELLOOOO WDYM CHEETAH WON ?? this is so. this is so crazy let’s take it one by one.
cheetah won .. tanned skin .. curly light brown hair with even lighter almost blondish stripes .. his shoulders are extremely broad, there are three diagonal scarring animalistic scratches on his back, his paws are calloused, tail spotted and scarily lengthy, ears also spotted and always perked up.
he’s a whole greek god. rough and merciless with his claws and strength, i can imagine his fangs being thicker than longer, one is even a tiny bit crooked so when he bites it’s one mark that’s off-slanted, and though this used to be something he was insecure about in his youth, now everyone recognised it as a very visible and threatening claim from the cheetah clan— from jungwon.
he’s absolutely feral. unforgiving in the forest when he has to attack preys to bring back fur because you shivered too much in his arms the night before— or you shared about how much you’ve been feeling weaker, and his mate mind instantly began snarling methods, recipes— bone broth, roasted meat— extra furs, to keep you warm and allow you to sleep through the whole night to regain energy, leather to help with straps and harnesses that might help with your aching muscles.
cheetah!jungwon had no issue with putting himself in front of other canines, not even a second thought to consider the possibility of him losing— it simply wasn’t in his book, he always won. it was guaranteed to him.
so when he comes back to the den from another hunt slightly scarred but with the weight of two animals on his shoulder? you’re already on your feet, barefoot and padding towards him. he quickly lowered the furs on the floor, then he turned to face you.
his fangs were still peeking out, claws still unsheathed and that ferocious glint was still twinkling in his eyes.
“won, baby..” you approached softly, hands careful as they gripped his own trembling ones. the adrenaline and feline instinct— the instinct to shred, to tear and gnaw sparking brightly in his veins and arteries. like his very marrow was lit on fire with the need to devour. the uncontrollable desire to claim and destroy.
and that’s how he looked at you for a split second.
like he wanted to do nothing more than force you inside of the den, press you into the furs that he had hunted and scented himself— press you, claim you, over and over again, flood you still your very breath smelled like his and keep you knotted till your body has no choice but to adapt to his shape inside of yours.
but it was only for a passing moment— he blinked and it was gone.
hair falling messily across his vision as he smiled, fangs flashing before he wrapped a hand under your knees—
and suddenly you were being thrown over his shoulder like you weighed nothing.
“what the— you just came back?!” your voice shrieked as you were faced with the annoyingly flawless view of his ass. “yeah i did, baby. now it’s time for me to relax.” he huffed a laugh as he walked towards the warmer parts of the nest. “exactly? so put me down, you beast!”
but jungwon just chuckled, tail flicking behind him when he refused to lower you yet. “i’m going to relax with you, little prey. you’re staying right where you are.” the cheetah replied before his free hand sneaked between your thighs, still pressing you to his shoulder with his left one while his right one pulled your panties to the side.
“soaked already? oh you’re more excited for this than i am.”
so so perfect i’m obsessed with them & have so many thoughts tbh i was just shy with my first anon >_<
but like i think when they first meet he’d be so frustrated bc she’s sooo naive, never realises that he’s dangerous and could hurt her, he’d probs mistake the frustration for hate at first but he’s really just infatuated and protective and doesn’t trust himself around her :(((
he’d try n scare her off too but even tho he’s the one scaring her she’d still run to him like he’s the safest place she knows & he’d just become so protective from there bc someone has to keep her safe !! hes seen her too many times wandering the forest oblivious to all danger and he can’t let anything happen to his baby deer :((
ugh im rambling i just love this pairing & you wrote so beautifully :((
—🪐💘 (ig this is me now i feel like ill be here a lot🥹)
my beloved anon hello & welcome !!! pls never be shy on my space here all asks r welcome pls always come n ramble for me ur thoughts r so :(
ur so right about jake being so. frustrated? confused? irritated? in their first ever meeting because he’s a panther, an apex predator. he doesn’t usually meet these kinds of fragile hybrids— he’s always surrounded by his own kind too. he’s been surrounded by canines and claws since he could remember and it’s what he always associated himself with, it’s where he found comfort in.
so when he saw deer you— just wandering in the university halls, pink and pastel colours surrounding you in a way that it looked like you radiated those colours yourself, presence as light as a feather, voice soft and calm with the sight of your eyes literally knocking his breath out, so big, so curious, so pure.
he didn’t know what to do. he didn’t know how to approach such a fragile creature— instincts roared in him to attack, to scratch and claim, to mark his territory. humanity whispered that he’s not meant to get close, not supposed to even be seen around you, it’s not a match, it’s an unbalance, it’s an inequality.
but somehow, you always managed to end up in his orbit.
whether it was the hybrid side lunch tables that consisted of your tail being right next to tiger jay’s thigh or the lectures where somehow the only empty seat was the one right in front of the panther— your little deer ears always seemed to twitch wherever he looked. always within his field of vision, constantly in his sight.
and he hated it.
he would growl at the thought of you getting close to him, of something as soft— as .. vulnerable as you getting close to something as dangerous and predatory as him. it made him irritated, he was raised with paws on his back and roars in his ears, a soft fluffy tail and doe eyes were not thing that’s belonged in his life.
even if .. you started to reach out for them yourself.
the difference between you and jake was very vast, except surprisingly enough there were also similarities between a deer and a black panther— he cared about getting as far away as possible from you, you cared about getting as close as possible to him.
it was the greetings first. the gentle ‘hello!’ that you’d chirp his way when he would round the corridor to his locker— unfortunately right next to yours.
then it was the questions, “hey.. um.. i hope i’m not bothering but do you remember how professor lee solved this?” and god he wished he could tell you that you were bothering him. that he didn’t have time. that he didn’t want to hear you, see you, be close to you.
but somehow he found himself muttering a ‘hey’ back. grumbling answers and simplified explanations that you would jot down your notes in small, messy handwriting. as expected he thought to himself.
and then it went past the questions, it went past the explanations and turned into gifts. the random thursday after your exam when you stumbled to stand in front of him with a small blueberry muffin— something about “your solutions helped me score really good in the exam!” your eyes were too bright, your tone too kind, muffin too homemade, too domestic, “it only felt right that i give this to you.. as a small ‘thank you for helping me’” you were too nice.
too gentle, too frail.
he couldn’t deal with this, a warmth like this didn’t belong in his den. he was convinced of it.
“you can keep it to yourself, bambi girl.”
he didn’t even realise that he said it— didn’t even process the words leaving his lips till he saw the way your expression fell.
there was no kind smile, no affection pouring out of your eyes all of your features became wrapped in shock, in hurt.
his tone was demeaning, it was bitter. should’ve been enough to drive you away, should’ve been more than enough to make you turn around and never approach the panther that others warned you about his claws.
but you didn’t.
“i.. really want you to keep it though.” your voice was wavering now, hand quickly placing the muffin in the second row of his open locker before walking hastily down the hall— leaving a frozen panther behind you.
did you just.. disobey him?
he was bewildered. more shocked than offended— if anything, there was this small itch of relief in him. one that he instantly clawed down before it grew.
but it kept happening. it wasn’t a one time thing, it seemed like you were determined to make him suffer.
when you sat behind him just to sneak a chocolate bar into his unzipped backpack, when you stuck a flower sticker to his coffee cup the second he turned to his side to answer sunghoon, when he muttered something about the weather turning cold and then finding a crocheted black sweater stuffed inside of his locker.
there was no note, no signature of who it could’ve been made by.
but jake didn’t need it, he scented you on it. the infuriating vanilla and lavender tones that he swore he hated but now he was pressing against his nose to inhale deeply.
he realised then that he wasn’t angry anymore, he didn’t find any irritation in your actions, the cherished the chocolate on his bedside table— barely even tasting it in fear of finishing something he didn’t want to admit he saw as important— so he shoved it in the drawer. he didn’t rip off the daisy sticker, it’s now padded with ink from the amount of times he would caress it when he’s writing and though no one will ever see him wearing that black sweater outside— it’s the one thing that always brought soft dreams to him during the night.
he was cracking, and it terrified him.
so when you slipped a wrapped cookie into his bag, you found it on your desk in the next lecture. when you placed a tiny “u okay :(?” note on his chair, it was crumpled in the trash by the end of the day.
jake believed that he was protecting himself, but you saw him hurting.
it was the day after now, his final lecture and he was still fumbling with his backpack— the only student left in the amphitheater before you slipped in.
“you’re avoiding me.”
“i never noticed you.”
he didn’t look at you, his eyes were still on the stuck zipper even though your dress was ruffling in the corner of his vision. “that’s a lie.” he sucked in a deep breath.
“you’re lying.”
he looked up at you now, ebony hair slicked back and chains twinkling on his rumbling chest. “what do you want?” it came out as a warning.
your chest constricted but you still held your ground, even if your tail twitched and your hands trembled.
because now you could clearly see the differences between you and him. just how massive he was, how soothing the musky, rainy scent that wafted off of him was, the warmth that radiated off of him— that rooted masculinity, the way he felt untouchable, the panther sleek and feline presence.
you felt drunk on it.
“you’re hurting.”
his expression didn’t change, but his ears twitched. uncovering all of his emotions. “you’re not supposed to be close to me.” he spoke his thoughts, his nightmares and his own fears of having something as fragile as you wandering close to him, even now he could tell that you were still calm, your scent was wavering but it was still warm. it wasn’t supposed to be like this.
he’s terrified.
“is that why you’re avoiding me? because i’m not supposed to be close to you?” your eyebrows pinched, but your expression wasn’t confused, it was you holding back.
jake could tell, this was you being brave. and something about that thought made his breath hitch.
it’s either now or never.
he stepped closer, feet heavy when he towered over you. shoulders wide and squared, head lowering in a mocking manner. “you’re a deer. you’re fucking weak. you’re not even someone i would pay attention to.” his claws were out this time, and he stepped forward once more.
but now you were stepping back, breaths uneven and your eyes were searching. rapidly going from his gaze to his claws to his lowered fangs, and jake noticed. he picked up everything. instincts sharp and heat smoldering in his frame.
“get out of your head. we’re not a match— we’re nothing.” with each word, his voice dropped another octave right until he started to snarl in your face.
you were trembling, feet swaying. but he kept going. “don’t think that because i accepted a thing or two that we’re something now— i did it out of pity. because you’re a deer. you’re nothing in comparison to me.” he growled each harsh word till you started to tremble fully.
with one final look— icy eyes slitted and fangs bared— he disappeared.
that’s when your knees gave out and you found your palms slamming on the freezing floor of the amphitheater.
his words were crushing, a panther’s aggression without even using his claws or his canines. you felt wounded. the pain lacerating through your heart because you didn’t mean to offend him— you didn’t see you two as a match, you weren’t provoking him or reaching for something impossible.
there was just .. a pull. a tug of your heart to his direction, and you’re a creature of habit. you follow your instincts and the direction that makes your heart thump even if it lead to claws and roars.
even if it leads to the same path again, sticking to familiarity was easier than dealing with something brand new.
what was meant to be jake’s threat towards you, to take your steps back and to stop approaching a panther’s den, you only took it as further proof of his fear, the chains that he clasped around his own wrists, the ones that a tiny voice in your head whispered to get rid off.
and you listened, because you had already felt him close. you had already picked up his scent, you already felt what it was like to have a panther accept a part of you, even if he didn’t admit it or show it— something deep down called you to him.
a week passed since you last saw jake, it was a new monday now. the air humid and the promise of rain collecting above your heads when you approached your class.
you could already scent him from outside the room.
his scent was deeper now, it carried more depth, more emotion.. more anguish.
quietly, you took your seat, white bag settling behind you as you faced the broad sight of jake’s back. and the twitch of his ears.
he knew you were behind him, he smelled you without needing to turn around, scent now imprinted in his mind as he had memorised it without even realising. and he despised it. he hated it.
but his heart loved it, he could feel it in the way warmth spread across his chest and his tail coiled around his leg like it was shy.
when the lecture ended, he swung his backpack over his shoulder. still not glancing behind him, but he still felt the new press of plastic on his back. you still pushed the cookie in his bag.
and jake felt exasperation he’s never felt before.
yet before he could turn around and shove his claws into the bag, grab the cookie and slam it into your table— you were already gone.
but you always managed to leave a trace of yourself behind you.
the rose that he threw away when you placed it on his jersey before football practice, the small crocheted pouch with hybrid trinkets inside of it that jay passed to him with a mutter of “some deer told me to give it to you?”, the tiny box of energy boosters that you left next to the tree he always shifted and curled under— you were everywhere and nowhere at the same time.
he didn’t see you leaving your tiny hoof prints around him, but he still felt you, still picked up your scent swirling in the air, still felt the way you left your warmth behind just for him.
it’s a few days after jake last saw you sitting behind him— you were clad in a baby blue jacket, tail decorated with a small white ribbon that fluttered behind you, your steps were quiet.
because it was just you two in the hall. he was resting on the bench outside of the university building, accompanied by nothing but the mere rustle of trees and now your presence too.
his jaw ticked once you stood in front of him, holding out a small jewellery box even when your hands were slightly trembling.
“why are you here?”
he didn’t take the box yet, he left your grip hanging in the air while you bit your bottom lip anxiously. “because i brought.. something.. for you.”
his tail twitched before he jerked it under his thigh, “i don’t want anything.” he ended, turning his head to the other side even when his ears pointed towards you. “i didn’t bring it because you need it.. i brought it because i want you to have it.”
jake looked back at you now, really looked at you. “who are you to decide what i accept and what i don’t?” his chest was rising and lowering rapidly now.
“jus— just take the box, please.” your voice lowered, hands wavering as you refused to look at his eyes, jake growled. “look at me when you talk to me.” he stood up now, panther boots crushing the leaves loudly while he stepped forward, intimidating your already shivering frame further— frightening your further.
“why are you doing this? didn’t i tell you that we’re nothing? that you should give up whatever plan you have in your head? fuckin— look at me!”
he wishes he didn’t say that.
because when you lifted your head to finally look at his eyes, yours were already filled with tears.
jake felt his heart stutter in his chest, ears pinning back and tail coiling terrifyingly fast behind him.
but before he could open his mouth again, he saw how the colour drained from your face. box slipping out of your hands before your body crashed to his.
you were shaking.
your very bones overwhelmed and jittering in his hold— the panther didn’t even realise when his arms wrapped around you, but he felt the way gravity shifted beneath him the moment your face pressed to his chest and your hands clumsily gripped onto his sweater.
“because i feel safe with you..” he almost didn’t hear you.
jake froze, but you continued. “i don’t know w—what it is.. but i feel the safest with you. even if you reject me, even if you scare me. i still can’t help but feel like your arms are the safest place for me.” your voice was breaking now, sobs slowly climbing out of your throat after being buried for so long.
and that made his hold around you tighten, his mouth was dry. head spinning but he didn’t let go. “p-please don’t push me away.. i don’t know how to m-make you accept me, but don’t push me away, please.”
his feet swayed, one hand lifting to cradle the back of your head with a gentleness you’ve never felt from him. “shh— okay.. okay. you’re okay. i won’t push you away, it’s okay. i’ve got you.”
but somehow his words only made you break down more. he was soft— claws fully retracted and tail now stroking your leg like his body was trying its best to calm yours down. his scent radiated in stronger waves, instincts curling inside of him. this was a prey in fear. and the panther inside of him couldn’t help but rumble at him to protect.
your scent was bitter. hurt and wounded as it sought his own— like a hand blindly reaching towards his and he didn’t have time to think about matches or your features. he held it back. you needed him and he was holding you now.
“i’ve got you.”
a,note how and why did this turn into a whole 2.7k idk but enjoy ! thank u anon !!!
contains: implied sex, threesome, suggestive more than anything
It's clear as the brightest sky how you're trying to put a patch on your liaison with rugby players Heeseung and Jake, to avoid facing reality by getting on your toes to hug that ex boyfriend of yours — a messy choice for a messy excuse.
Not a slipped foot, nor a rushed decision: in less than a week, you've found your feet in Heeseung and Jake's team's sector, partying at their district club like that has always been your scene; call them casualties — or don't — and two pairs of arms caught you in a delicious trap. For a long night.
You're born to create chaos. Going out of the rivals' district, making of their supporters your new friends and, on top of it, fucking two of the hottest teams' members, always on everyone's mouth for their excellent gameplay — being good-looking is also a big quality of them, and they won't let modesty ruin an exquisite night of alternative 'fun and games'.
Many think you're acting in spite of revenge after the breakup, but in all honesty you've always been curious of the so-called other side of the play-court.
Your playing pretend doesn't upset them; instead, it truly amuses them, as they observe you chirping around the guy from their respective side of the play court. Small hands — compared to theirs — closed around his biceps, eyes glinting of a subtle restlessness; they have learned a lot from the push and pull during your close encounter, which leads them to think that maybe, maybe, you feel it too, the ticklish sensation on your nape: the exact sensation you got from Jake's whispered encouragement while slotted inside your moist, eager pussy, while those hands — yours — were exploring their backs, climbing their chests as your ass was used for a proper leverage by Heeseung; your nails as authors of the indents of their own biceps, close to you enough to get warm from your erratic breath.
They created a rhythm, you followed with every fiber of your body, mind included. If the position allowed it to happen, you'd pour all your intent to meet their pistoning hips, while looking up at their sweaty face with glossy eyes, loud just as your strangled words were.
Your ex boyfriend won't ever meet the bar the two men have now set. Very, oh, very unfortunate. Your ego is now bruised, 'cause you fell into their arms with an overly excited passion, leaving the self-control on the dusty doormat of Heeseung's place. Nothing went unnoticed to them, it could've hardly happened: the next morning, reality hit you hard with full consciousness, as you were in bed with Jake, and Heeseung was in the kitchen whipping something up for breakfast. You may have left a sign on them — like the mark of your teeth on the younger's nose, where a scar from a game set proudly already — but it's hardly as rampageous as the heavy depth in your stomach. The consuming desire you were feeling right after waking up — as your full attention was on Jake and the glow around his face and large shoulders, kissed from the morning light — brought you to run out of the apartment through agitated motions. Red cheeks and frowning brows, the keys to your behavior.
But what can an eager spirit do when the desire is so strong? When the glass is almost completely full, and might spill in a second or two from the intense gaze of two pairs of eyes, from the memory of their respective scents, that heavenly meld together?
And so forth, you can try and fight the pull running through your body, however you already know how the night is going to end — when it is going to actually begin in worthy significance. Perhaps at Jake's place this time, without running away but diving even more in the warm, aphrodisiacal pair that Heeseung and Jake are.
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