Day 27- The moment I realised I liked Snape
My love for Severus did not start with the movies: the books and the fandom are to blame for it. Tbh my favourite HP character was initially Sirius. Great potential: romantic, tragic, misunderstood, powerful, smart, often childish, loyal and flawed (seeing the pattern already?). Still, Snape had caught my attention since his first appearance because, you know, all that Slytherin charisma, charming personality, shameless sarcasm and delightful unfairness.
Probably, I realised Snape was my true hero when he says in OotP:
“Then you will find yourself easy prey for the Dark Lord! Fools who wear their hearts proudly on their sleeves, who cannot control their emotions, who wallow in sad memories and allow themselves to be provoked this easily – weak people, in other words – they stand no chance against his powers!“
He sounded suddenly too vehement about it and my immediate thought was that he was speaking about himself. It meant that Snape’s real persona was emotionally too vulnerable, had something very sad happened to him, and was easily provoked- which supposed he was fundamentally insecure, felt hurt, had often been physically or emotionally abused in the past and stayed angry with himself and everybody. Easy prey for the Dark Lord. So, he had to build a solid armor to protect and hide his true self. He had to wear a mask, take up arms, erect walls and fight to defend himself, and now here he was, believing that displaying vulnerability and emotions is weakness.
Snape is wrong, mostly. Sure, his cover is strong, and Voldemort cannot reach his mind; and no one sees the ‘’weakness’’ (i.e. his ability to love and feel emotions) behind the mask, except for Dumbledore. But for this reason, by abnegation and because he cannot let himself be “exposed”, i.e. unprotected again, Snape sacrifices his whole life. Not when he dies, but when he receives no love and no recognition. Even, he has to kill the only one person who knows his other self, and he has to accept that Lily’s son would die. As if it was not enough, he also has to tell Harry the whole truth of Dumbledore’s greater good and of his own story. I’d say Snape lived not in vain, but only for the sake of others. No wonder he goes wild when he is called coward.
And at some point I started reading Snacks on line. People who ship the characters know how to convey their passion: this is why the books and the fandom are to blame for my obsession with Snape.
Link to the full pic here.
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