Viewpoints for Living

This blog is about establishing a collection of thoughts that help us live better.

[viewpointsforliving]

Argument vs. Discussion

An "argument" is a demand for confirmation and agreement, whereas a "discussion" is the sharing of information and opinions.

-Barksdale

[viewpointsforliving]

Sometimes, An Unhelpful Reasoning Style

(Source: PsychologyTools.org)

[viewpointsforliving]

Belief Magnet Metaphor

Your beliefs are always waiting to ATTRACT evidence which confirms them.

Your beliefs REPEL evidence which does not fit. This makes it hard to see or believe anything which contradicts them.

(Source: PsychologyTools.org)

[viewpointsforliving]

If I am not at peace, then I must have decided wrongly.

-Iyanla Vanzant

[viewpointsforliving]

[viewpointsforliving]

These are known as a “coping statements”, where you talk to yourself in a way that better makes you able to cope with or accept what is happening without getting upset about it.

Pick 10 and memorize them.

Shoulds are bull.

People just do the best they can within the limits of their awareness.  I do not hold them as the problem, as the problem is the lack of awareness.

I am fully capable of taking care of myself.

People don’t always do what you want them to do.  That’s just what’s so. 

Breathe deep, relax (3 deep breaths)

Getting upset solves no problems and just causes them.

I am calm and relaxed.

Cool down.

Be cool.

I can handle this; I am in control of myself. 

I’m a good person.

It’s not so serious.

It’s no big deal. 

I am powerful and fully capable of handling things.

This is not my problem.

That’s a violation of my boundaries and I will not allow that.

This too shall pass.

Relax now. 

I’m intelligent.

I’m capable.

I can master anything with enough effort.

No matter what happens, I’ll always be fine. 

Life is good.  Life works.

It’s who I am and who I become that counts.

I have an excellent value system and I do my best.

I’m a good, solid person.

I am caring and kind.

I am unstoppable.

I can figure anything out and do anything that anybody else can do, within my physical limitations.

I’m a loving spouse.

I do my best to do what’s right.

I’m happy.  After all, I’m on the right side of the grass.

I am powerful and self-sufficient.

For Self Instruction

One step at a time

I’m prepared.

I’ll figure it out.

I can follow a plan.

I can do this.

Take three deep breaths and feel the power!

This time, user just-another-blogging-recoverer added their own, much-better ones at the end:

Adding my own:

I’m not being mean; I have to be assertive to be healthy.

There are reasonable ways to express myself.

I have a right to speak up.

I can do this.

Follow the plan instead of my feelings.

Something is better than nothing.

I will feel better afterwards.

It’s okay to be unsure.

My life is more than just one part.

I have things to be grateful for in life.

Things are difficult now, but are bound to get better.

I deserve credit for trying.

I have positive qualities.

I have hopes for the future.

I will persevere.

I will make a point of helping someone else today.

I have people I care about.

I’m going to get better.

I will do whatever it takes.

Hard times will make me stronger.

I have worth.

Today, I will make a point of focusing on the positive.

I have to take things one day at a time.

I can treat myself with care and compassion.

I will try doing one different thing.

It’s important to remember that I do have an illness.

I appreciate that I haven’t quit.

I can learn from what I am going through.

One day I will be well.

I choose life.

I am a lovable person.

There are people who are precious to me.

I deserve the time and space to recover.

Better days are coming.

(Source: just-another-blogging-recoverer)

[viewpointsforliving]

"Well I think I'm naturally optimistic, but also I think the facts are on the side of the optimists." -Bill Gates

See: Gratitude is Rational

[viewpointsforliving]

Think Again: How to Reason and Argue

Learn:

How to spot an argument.

How to untangle an argument.

How to make your own argument.

How to use reason and logic.

Think these skills would be useful in life? Sign up for "Think Again: How to Reason and Argue", a free online class from Duke University, and take it with me! I'm forming a discussion group from my readers and a friend of mine. There's already two of us, if you join, make it a third! It's free!