yOU GOT ME MESSED UP MAN
KIROKAZE
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Xuebing Du
Cosmic Funnies

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Today's Document

@theartofmadeline

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wallacepolsom
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
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ellievsbear

tannertan36

titsay

Origami Around
Peter Solarz
Game of Thrones Daily
d e v o n
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@vintahge
yOU GOT ME MESSED UP MAN
if u think that there has ever been a greater scene on television think again
When you realise you’ve had one too many..
someone was like hey do a flower beard thing and i was like okay
this is oddly interesting
twatsketball
me
these anons are like, "can i be racist in the rain? can i be racist on a train? can i be racist in a box? can i be racist with a fox?"
lmfaoooooooooooooo Yes!
Lmao! How can I be racist if I work with blacks How can I be racist if one sold me slacks I’m not racist I’m just like you. I’m best friends with a black or two.
i’m not racist, you see, it’s just a preference i love eastern culture and its women’s deference the west lost its way with no room for clemency If I love Asian women, how’s that white supremacy?
i’m not a racist, i can’t be, you see my great grandma’s grandma was part cherokee plus one time i got called “cracker” to my face don’t we all bleed red? i don’t even see race…
I’m not racist, blacks just need to stop complaining Living in the past and white people blaming I work hard, no handouts for every little fraction If white privilege isn’t fair, then how is affirmative action?
how can i be racist? i love Asia so much! i like karaoke and China and K-pop and such in fact, i hate that i’m white with such passion i wish i was Japanese so i could wear some Shibuya fashion!
"make up is false advertisement!"
translation:
"i view women as products"
If you went on a few dates with a charming, fit-looking guy, decided to invite him upstairs, and after he took off his shirt he unstrapped a hidden girdle and his massive gelatinous kegbelly rippled forth, you would be pissed too.
did you really just compare a woman putting some powder on her face to a guy literally reshaping his entire body
All you have to do is make .gifs of yourself wearing an ill fitting suit and, like, a fucking bow tie or w/e and it’s like this whole website creams itself
if you have school tomorrow
i hate pants that make it look like i have a boner when i sit but then i remember im a girl but i still worry that somebody will think i have a boner
SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS
Do… Girls really worry about this?
Yes
yes
yes
I like how, when Tumblr recommends you a blog on your dash, you can choose to ignore it. And it looks really polite
But it slowly gets more agressive
And more agressive
And more
Then it’s just plain rude
And my personal favourite
MEETING 5SOS!!!!! I HAD MY CAMERA DOWN MY PANTS SO THAT I COULD FILM IT!!! I HAVE A BIT OF y0u-are-simply-amazing MEETING THEM AS WELL
I AM FUCKING SCREAMING BECAUSE THIS IS SERIOUSLY THE BEST THING EVER
SWEET JESUS
You have your mother’s cheek bones
godDAMMIT NOW WE’RE SHIPPING CUTLERY
TUMBLR YOU NEED TO S T O P
I hope this post comes back to me when it has a short story attached.
The Utensils were a happy family, just like any other. Fork was a loving, caring father, who worked at a bank, and Spoon was his beautiful wife, who owned a small business that allowed her to spend a lot of time with their son, Spork. Every day, when Fork came home from work, he gently clinked against the rim of Spoon’s face and asked how her day had been. She would go on and on about how her Aunt Bowl was letting anyone fill her up these days, and telling him he would never guess who they got a phone call from today (it was his brother, Knife), and he would just lean back against the china cabinet, staring at his wife’s beautiful reflective surface, and know everything was right in the world.
One day, however, everything was suddenly not right in the world at all.
Fork woke up in the silverware drawer and instantly knew something was wrong. He looked over to where Spoon normally slept, confused when he saw nothing but empty space. Or, at least, he thought it was empty. It took him a minute to see the small note left there. Oh no. God, no, he thought.
He picked up the note with shaking prongs, and read amid tears:
“Fork,
I’m sorry to leave you like this, but I just couldn’t face seeing you. It’s too painful. I’m not strong enough to tell you this to your face, and I know that makes me a coward. I know that makes me a horrible utensil. But I can’t do this anymore.
Do you remember Cow’s party the other night? The night she was so drunk she swore she jumped over the moon? Well, I met someone that night. His name is Dish. And we’re running away together.
Please, don’t try and find us. Dish makes me happy. He doesn’t spend all day staring at me, looking at himself in my reflection.
Goodbye, Fork.
-Spoon”
Fork collapsed to the ground, wishing he could tell Spoon that the reason he loved staring at her reflective surface so much, was because of the way her surface magnified everything around her, making it seem so much greater and more beautiful than people could see themselves as normally. Her personality did the same thing. It’s what he loved most about her. And what he would miss most of all.
I CAN’T EVEN WITH THIS FUCKING SITE.
bra..fucking..vo
sweet jesus i’m crying over cutlery
things like this make me happy i have a tumblr
i’M CRYING… BECAUSE CUTLERY.
This website is going to be the death of me.
The moment my panties dropped
oh frick
I will defend my favorite band member faster than myself
5SOS interview: Boys perform at iTunes Festival and talk about their success