[violetscar656]

Masterlist

ACOTAR

Azriel

Aftermath Series (Completed) Part1 Part2 Part3 Part 4 Part5 Court of Calm Chaos (Ongoing)

Rhysand

Promises Made (Angst) (Oneshot)

Cassian

Coming soon

Eris

The Snowflake and The Fire (Ongoing) Part1 Part2

[violetscar656]

The Snowflake and The Fire

Summary: They met Under the Mountain. Carved a thin slice of happiness from the misery. After things fell out between them, Eris finally opens up

Warnings: Lil angst, abuse, soft Eris?, female reader , Non-canon

Author's Note: Hi guys, part two of Eris x reader. It is kinda short compared to the other.

I really enjoy reading the comments please leave one

ENJOY!

P.S I’m working on my Azriel series as well, I just had to get this outta my head to focus on that one

He walked down the dimly lit hall toward the west wing, where most of the Autumn people were kept. It was later than usual, but the images wouldn’t stop clawing at him. Eris shook his head sharply. Not here. Not in front of him

“And when is this happening?” Beron’s voice came from the half-open study door

“Tomorrow, my Lord” One of his father’s trusted answered

Eris put the mask of the cruel prince and stepped inside “Father”

“Where have you been, boy?” Beron snarled

Eris offered a wicked practiced smile “Matters required my attention”

Beron tsked “The event for tomorrow is already in motion I trust?”

Eris sat beside his father, eyes flicking over the two empty bottles on the table. He kept his tone light almost bored “Of course”

Beron drained his glass in one swallow “Winter had it coming. What happens to those rebellious little children is their own fault”

Eris’s heart slammed to a brutal stop. Horror ripped across his face before he could cage it. The mask cracked completely. For one agonising second the world went silent except for the roaring of his blood. Innocent lives. He had known too late

He heard Beron’s voice continue Eris’s hands curled into fists beneath the table as he slammed the mask back into place—the wicked male everyone expected him to be.

“That is very true, Father” He replied, voice steady and empty

That memory had become a constant reminder of his shame, his guilt. Of her pain. Like a blade between his ribs.

Eris stopped outside the door to the Winter Princess’s chambers. She had arrived last night, offered only the barest, coldest greetings, and disappeared behind these walls. She hadn’t come for breakfast, claiming to be nauseous from travel.

He lifted a hand, hovering just above the door, aching to reach her. But he let it fall. The decision he had made the moment Kallias’s letter arrived still held

He turned on his heel and walked toward the great hall to inspect the coronation preparations.

°❆⋆ঌ.࿐

Ember was tired yesterday night, but since she woke morning, she kept finding little pieces here and there. Pieces of Winter.  A decorative bowl, with pinecones on the dressing table. Crystal snowflake, a mini structure of the winter deer on the bookshelf. A liquor decanter with staghorn. There were more hidden gems like that

But her eyes went at the vase placed on the bed side side, dark grey marble, with flowers that should be only in be in Winter. Ember’s eyes sparkled looking at the white teardrop shaped petals

Winter’s Snowdrop, the promise of hope, a promise of better tomorrow.

Her treacherous heart melted. Then, clenched with familiar anger

How? Why? Why did these small gestures still pierce her so deeply when he had hidden something so devastating?

A knock from the door broke her spiraling questions

She opened it and peaked outside

A messenger stood there, he bowed his head in greeting “The Lady of the house wishes to meet you” He said  “I am to escort you there” He gave a warm smile

There was no room for refusal. Ember forced a polite smile and followed.

The secluded garden at the back of the palace was quiet, shielded by tall hedges and ancient trees. Lady of Autumn waited with a warm, familiar smile that tugged painfully at old memories

Ember bowed “It is good to see you”

“Please, sit”

Pouring the tea with her own hands Autumn’s Lady added “I noticed you weren’t there at breakfast”

The placed a plate of berry tarts and delicate sandwiches before her—Ember’s favorites, the kind she could never resist.

Ember’s throat tightened. Only one person in this entire court had ever known her preferences so precisely.

She noticed her reaction and gave a gentle knowing look “There is very little I do not notice about who my eldest cares for”

Ember grabbed one of the tarts

“You also go for the sweet things first” The Lady of Autumn said in delight

Ember cleared her throat “You wished to meet me?”

“I merely wanted to see you” Her gaze flicked to the thick form of trees

“I wanted to ask you if you wish to look at gowns, for the coronation” Lady Autumn said calmly  

Ember studied her, her careful wordings, the hidden meanings. And have a small genuine smile

That evening, the great hall glittered with the finest autumnal decorations for the pre-coronation supper. 

Ember arrived deliberately late, hoping to slip into her seat unnoticed. She was glad to see familiar faces among the guests — Keela from the Dawn Court and Varian of Summer. She spoke with them quietly, grateful for the distraction, laughing softly at Keela’s dry humor

Ember tried her best not to look at the head of the table where Eris sat beside his father. But she felt his gaze on her. 

Her stomach twisted—anger, longing, betrayal, and something softer she refused to name. She wanted to hate him. She should hate him. Yet the Winter Snowdrops in her room and the careful touches throughout her chambers made her chest ache with conflicting emotions.

Beron’s sharp voice cut through the murmurs like a blade “Winter’s emissary” Embers head turned towards him

“Tell me girl” Beron drawled “Does your Court still mourn at the loss for the little ones?” There was a slight tilt on this lips

Ember’s fingers tightened around her fork until her knuckles whitened. She forced her voice steady “Winter remembers its losses. We also remember our strength” Her gaze flicked to Eris, his mask cracking for just a second, raw fury shown in them 

Beron laughed, low and mocking. “Strength”-“How charming.” His gaze slid to Eris, then back to her “The snow always melts in the presence of fire” 

The threat was thinly veiled. Ember inclined her head, refusing to flinch, and with icy coldness added “Then it is fortunate that we have learned to endure the hottest flames” 

°❆⋆ঌ.࿐

“Is it selfish to think that I’m happy?” Ember questioned “Given the circumstances” She looked at Eris lying beside her, his eyes were distant

She placed a hand on his chest. Eris snapped and fully turned towards her “I think” His voice was raw “That this slice we cut for ourselves is worth it”

A warm smile painted his face, but his eyes were sad.

He cupped her face “You are worth it”

Ember returned to her chambers after supper, emotions frayed raw. She was reaching for her nightgown

She thought about the fury on Eris’s eyes. She didn’t want to care, couldn’t, not after what he did.

Changing into a night gown, a knock sound pulled Ember to the door, but nobody was there

The knock came again, this time toward her left, she noticed the bookshelf. The bare wall beside it.

“Take the black and gold book out” A  muffled voice came, familiar, but she couldn’t place it

Ember’s gaze immediately went to the bookshelf. But before anything she grabbed her dagger underneath her pillow

She took the book out, a creaking sound followed, the wall opened, like a door.

A figure emerged, she didn’t think once as she came up from behind and placed the dagger on the tall male’s throat

Long dark copper hair came in view, as the male turned his head and his mechanical eye moved  “I would appreciate if you could let me go” Lucien said

Ember “Lucien!” – What are you doing here?” Her voice was a whisper

Lucien huffed “You don’t have to whisper” – “This room is one of the safest places” – “With wards even Beron will find hard to break”

Ember's brows lifted, her gaze darted to the secret passage

“Don’t worry I was just here to drop someone” Ember’s brows furrowed “The Night Court’s emissary”

Lucien let a sigh out “And because I owe a favor” – “To Eris”

“No” Ember snapped “I do not want to talk about him” Old anger rising

“Listen” Lucien continued as if Ember did not speak “My brother is many things” He paused  “But a cheat and liar is not one of them” – “Not to the ones he cares about”

His tone shifted “And I speak with experience”

“If he needs to tell me anything” She snarled “Tell him to face me” – “Tell him that he needs to face the reactions he caused”

“I do wish too” Came a very familiar voice from the passage of the door “If you allow it”

Eris gave a nod to Lucien as he entered and the other left

Ember’s body went cold and hot all at once seeing Eris come. The bruises that lined his face the split lip

Amber eyes met hers and suddenly she realized it was just them

“What do you want?” Ember growled, dagger still gripped tightly.

“Many things” Eris rasped, voice rough with exhaustion and longing  “But right now I want to know why you never came to me—even after every letters I sent”

“You think I would even read them?” she bit out, anger and pain lacing every word “After everything?”

Eris’s expression crumpled with sorrow “Do you think I would ever risk you?”

Ember didn’t know how to respond to that, but deep down she knew. By the cauldron this male would have done anything for her, did anything.

“You know me” A statement “You shouldn’t have hidden behind letters”

Eris thrust his hand through his hair “You know why this happened?” He gestured to his face

Ember went still, she didn’t want to acknowledge the sadness and wrath that came with looking at his bruise

“It was because Beron got to know my mother asked to meet you” His voice rising with barely controlled fury “It is because he wished to know what you spoke about”

He let out a dry laugh “And when I told him”- “He didn’t think the answer was true and this” He gestured to his bruises again

Eris stepped closer  “That’s who I’ve spent my whole life protecting anyone I care about from. The monster who rules this court” – “Protecting you from”

As soon as those words left from his mouth the dam broke, Eris couldn’t stop  “I swear” his voice raw, and eyes that didn’t leave hers “To whatever shattered pieces of my soul remain—I didn’t know anything until it was too late”

Ember saw, heard the truth in his voice, the wall she built around her heart brick by brick cracked a little

“It happened that night. That night we lay together speaking about our happiness Under the Mountain, about a future we both knew we might never have” Eris’s voice was rough “I went back to my father’s study and only overheard fragments” -  “I played along because I had to” He paused “And when Beron finally said that Winter was the target”

His voice cracked “Trust me, little fire, I didn’t know. Not in time to stop it. Not in time to warn you without pinning a target on your back for Amarantha to destroy”

Eris slowly sank to his knees before her, head bowed at first, then lifting so their eyes could meet

His hands trembled as he reached out but stopped short of touching her “If they had known I was with you—if they had even suspected—I refused to risk you” -  “I would rather carry your hatred for the rest of my days than see you broken because of me.”

A broken whimper left Ember, as the tears began rolling down, she couldn’t stop them.

She remembered that night as if it was yesterday, where they spoke about everything and nothing. The distant look  in his eyes, when they started speaking about a future. Hopelessly. That particular night where he held her tighter than usual

She sank to her knees too, fingers trembling as they finally brushed his bruised cheek. Eris’s entire body shuddered at the gentle contact, a broken sound escaping him.

“You didn’t know” Ember whispered in a trembling voice

Eris slightly shook his head, eyes lined with silver

“You didn’t betray me”

“Never you” Eris rasped, words that came from the depths of this soul “Never”

The wall around her heart came crashing down

With a chocked sob , Ember leaned forward and threw her arms around him

Eris caught her instantly, crushing her against his chest. His anchor, his whole world. His hands trembled as one splayed on her back. Another one slid up to cradle the nape of her neck, fingers threading desperately through her pale blonde hair. He buried his face in the curve of her shoulder, breathing her in deeply. Home. After a very, very long time, he was finally home.

₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡˚₊ ⋆꙳❅*‧ ₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡˚₊ ⋆꙳❅*‧ ₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡˚₊ ⋆꙳❅*‧ ₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡˚₊ ⋆꙳❅*‧ ₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡

Note: I know this was more direct, but I really wanted to clear the air between the characters for the other part

I hope you guys liked it

Taglist 🧡 - @asfkoie @shinyghosteclipse @langsnscraps

[violetscar656]

Court of Calm Chaos - Chapter 7

Summary: Lilith's past resurfaces at the worst time. The High Lords meeting. And so does the tension between her and Azriel (idk how to summarise properly)

Warnings: Mature content, 18+, Vomit, Mentions of dying

Author's Note: Hi guys! It's been long I know. But I finally Chapter 7 is here. I hope you guys enjoy. Comments are open to all.

P.S. The story down the line will be split in Lilith's POV and even Azriel's POV (not much but yeah)

Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

She felt bile rise up yet again as she jolted up and threw up. Lilith wiped the sweat of her face as her gaze landed on the healer

Neema stood there, expression as unreadable, as if she had seen this type of reaction thousands of times. She took various bottles of portions lined up on the side table and started to mix them once again

“I don’t think I will be able to drink that again” Lilith said in a weak voice

The healer gave her a sharp look, but her words were soft as she said “It must be difficult” – “But you set yourself a goal”

Lilith took a long breath, her goal, her goal to see her sister again. To find where she was, if she was happy. To make sure Elain either didn’t marry that idiot fool, and if she did, to scare the living hell out of him to behave himself. And Nesta –She glanced at the tonics “You told me this worked” The statement came out as a question

Lilith’s body trembled as she got up and stood in front of a mirror. She had requested it to be placed there. To remind herself that this was for Feyre, for the promise made to her mother. And the sparkle of hope she saw in her father’s eye when Neema first came.

She took off the locket her father had given to her, opening it she read the small note for the hundredth time

"You are stronger than you give yourself credit for, Lilypad"

She looked at her reflection, the bruises under her eyes, the bones peeking out from the length of her body, the greyish pale under her skin.

Yes, it had lessened from the first time, but it still wasn’t good enough, not for her

Neema placed a hand of her shoulder “There is more to just healing your body” – “Your heart must be too” Lilith had heard these words many times

But what followed was something new “But your soul also must want to live”

Lilith blinked in surprise, and out of nowhere a sudden laugh burst from her, there was nothing joyful in that laugh. It was pain, a laugh that was born out of pure sorrow, sacrifice and pain. She thought of the words again her mind reacted with loader chuckles

Neema’s expression was something mixed between horrified and sorrow “Sorry” Lilith said in midst of chuckles “It’s just” She willed herself to stop

“If you knew my life” She sighed, a sorrowful smile dawning on her face, Lilith shook her head

Changing the subject, she said “Next”

That particular memory played again and again, Your soul must want to live. Did she understand those words? Did her soul truly want to live? Was all that had happened not enough? The fact that she couldn’t figure out anything from the powers to the bond, not a sign of something?

She didn’t know how and when she reached the Town House, somehow the long walk got completed. And she reached the right place

She stood there for a while, strengthening not only her mental shields but also sealing up the space where the golden light came from. Her excuse was not to distract or get distracted when the war broke out, and somehow, the High Lord didn’t notice her ulterior motive when she asked how not to send emotions down the bond.

But somehow she knew, she knew that her priority wouldn’t be the war, it would be this.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

He couldn’t sleep. The nightmares were nothing new—shadows of the things he had done as the Night Court’s spymaster, the blood on his hands that no amount of time could wash clean. They came and went like unwelcome ghosts.

But tonight… tonight was different. Heart thumping, Azriel dragged a hand through his damp hair, his body still slick with cold sweat; the cell from his past had returned after years—stone walls, iron chains, the suffocating dark. Only this time, it hadn’t been him trapped inside. It had been her

His shadows stirred, curling along his shoulders, whispering against his ear “Townhouse… safe” A pause “But something is wrong” His jaw tightened

That much, he already knew. Lilith had been fine yesterday morning—more than fine. Laughing, teasing him, that quiet warmth in her eyes that he had begun to crave more than he should. When he and Cassian left for the camp, she had stayed behind at the townhouse without a second thought.  Nothing had seemed off.

Except now, the ice-cold, nothingness down the bond was terrifying. There had never been a moment—not one, when he couldn’t feel her. Her emotions had always reached him, let it be anger, happiness or even when she left lonely.

His instincts roared, clawing at his control. Something is wrong.

The cold wind drifting in from the balcony did little to steady him. Azriel stepped outside anyway, gripping the railing. His thoughts spiralled. The war, the nightmare. The way she had looked at him. The way she had felt in his arms, and now this emptiness. His grip tightened.

Did she regret it? The question came sharp as a blade Did I push too far? His wings shifted restlessly behind him. Or worse, did something happen to her?

Azriel stilled, shadows rising, coiling, restless. There was only one way to silence the storm. He stepped back from the railing, and flew into the sky.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith stared at her reflection from where she sat on the dresser.

The dark circles beneath her eyes had deepened. Her skin had taken on a faint paleness, almost ghostlike in the morning light. She exhaled slowly, her fingers curling against the wood.

She couldn’t face anyone like this. But, then again, it wasn’t a secret that she didn’t get much sleep. Maybe, she will chalk it up to that

Her gaze drifted to the bed. The dress lay there, carefully chosen, its fabric catching the soft spill of sunlight through the window. A small, unfamiliar smile tugged at her lips. She hadn’t always liked things like this, anything that felt… feminine.

But now they made her feel something she didn’t quite have a name for. Something good.

The sunlight shifted, cascading fully across the dress, and Lilith stilled. The shimmer—her breath caught. It looked like his siphons. That same quiet glow of blue.

His image rose in her mind; his rare smile, the way his shadows curled and danced, the way his eyes softened, warming into that honeyed gold whenever they found her.

Her chest tightened “Your soul must want to live” Neema’s voice echoed through her thoughts, steady and unyielding.

And then, a softer and deeper voice “Come back”  “Come back to me” “I’ll wait”. Words that had once haunted her, were now like an anchor

Lilith closed her eyes Yes she thought, certain. Her soul did want to live. Not just for him. But for this—this, uncertain, new life unfolding before her. She wasn’t just surviving anymore, even with the given situations.

She would endure them, face them, and this time she would live.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

They entered the townhouse clad in their finest leathers, every siphon gleaming.

Azriel’s shadows scattered instantly, slipping into every corner, every hallway, searching. He gave a brief nod to Mor and Amren in the sitting room.

“Well” Cassian drawled, stretching his arms “Glad we’re not the last ones” – “This one” he jerked a thumb toward Azriel “Was ready before I even woke up” Azriel ignored him.

Every part of him was somewhere else, waiting. And then his shadows stilled, shifting, curling inwards.

And then she walked in, wrapped in his shadows as if they belonged to her. Azriel drew in his first real breath in what felt like hours. His gaze locked onto her—and widened, she was wearing blue, his blue.

The next breath never came “Ours” “Beautiful” “Pretty” “Ours” His shadows whispered over one another, restless

A hint of a smile curved Lilith’s lips as she caught him ogling at her. She tilted her head ever so slightly, then flicked her eyes to the side in silent warning, as if to say something.

It took a long moment for the rest of the room to come into focus. For the High Lady standing beside her to register. Feyre, radiant as starlight against the dark. Azriel dipped his head at once in acknowledgement

A muffled laugh slipped from Feyre as she nudged Lilith lightly. She knew, exactly why the shadowsinger’s mind was so distracted.

There was laughter as Cassian tried awkwardly to compliment Feyre, Mor immediately cutting in with a jab.

A smile tugged at Lilith’s lips when her eyes met Azriel’s again. She bit her lip, the memory of his taste flickering through her. But he didn’t move, nor did she.

A shadow softly brushed along her cheek. Lilith closed her eyes, understanding the things he couldn’t say.

The door opened, and Nesta stepped in, wearing a gown of darkest blue. Lilith’s gaze shifted to Cassian. The storm of emotion in his eyes made something in her chest ache.

Nesta passed them all, stopping before Feyre, for a heartbeat, her gaze flicked to Lilith “You both look beautiful” Lilith’s eyes widened slightly, one glance at Feyre told her she was also surprised

“I’m going to keep my word” Nesta said quietly “I can’t stay here” Her eyes settled fully on Lilith now “Not after what you did” A pause “For Elain… and, even at the battle” Lilith’s throat tightened.

“I know you will fight for the humans” Nesta continued “But I won’t let you do it alone” And then whispered “It would make me a coward”

Lilith parted her lips, but no words came. Instead, her mind played a memory of Nesta laughing, spinning to music Lilith had played long ago. A different time.

“The position of emissary to the Human Lands is open” Rhysand’s smooth voice cut through “Care for the job?”

“I’ll make you pay to the teeth for my services” Nesta shot back.

“I’d expect nothing less from an Archeron sister” Lilith arched a brow at him. Rhysand only gave a lazy, knowing shrug.

“Twenty gold marks says a fight breaks out in forty minutes” Cassian announced.

“Forty, and I say thirty” Mor countered

“Fifty” Azriel’s voice cut through deep yet calm “Twenty minutes” Lilith turned to him, both brows lifting as she mouthed Twenty? Azriel replied with a faint tilt of his lips

“One hundred” Rhys said, cutting in “Fifteen minutes” Every eye snapped to him. He pointed straight at Lilith “Double if it’s this one”

The shadows around Lilith swirled either in agreement or protest; she couldn’t tell.

She gaped “Excuse me? I am perfectly in control of my emotions”

Mor snorted “Not when it comes to Feyre” And teasingly added “Or a certain shadowsinger” Azriel choked on his breath

Lilith snapped her mouth shut.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

To call the Dawn Court beautiful would have been an understatement. The sky stretched above them in sweeping strokes of blue, violet, and soft pink, like a living painting. It reminded her of sunrise over Velaris.

She lingered a step behind as Feyre and Rhysand were greeted, as names were exchanged and old friends met again.

“And they are?” Thesan asked at last, his gaze settling on Nesta and Lilith

They stepped forward “These are my sisters” Feyre said “Nesta and Lilith”. Thesan politely greeted before turning to Lilith. She offered her hand.“It’s nice to meet you” – “Thank you for having us”

Something shifted, it was subtle. Anyone else might have missed it. But Lilith didn’t. Thesan’s expression stilled, not in shock or surprise, but something close to searching. Her smile faltered.

“It… it’s a pleasure to have you” Thesan said too quickly, releasing her hand “Please, have a seat” – “I’ll… see that everything is prepared” He turned away before anyone could respond

Lilith’s brows knit as she watched him go. Slowly, she glanced toward her High Lord and Lady, silently questioning and confused.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Anger built up and up, but she didn’t lose control. Not when she saw Baron, heard his hollow logic. Not when Thesan and Helion watched her as if she were an object to study.

She felt it all, and showed nothing. They will say anything to provoke you What Feyre said before echoed in her mind. Then Rhysand’s Imagine it’s the Court of Nightmares He had said Just with less skin and more power. And Amren’s warning Don’t get rattled by words and call the shadows to you. In other words—don’t let them see what she was to the Night Court’s Spymaster.

Her gaze flicked to the thin band of shadow circling her wrist. That one never left, no matter how many times she told it to.

When Tamlin began spinning his tale of how Feyre had been under influence, how he had only been trying to protect her, Lilith wanted to laugh in his face. She found it assuming how a man who lived hundreds of years could still have his head up his ass

But irritation sharpened into something darker as he twisted Rhysand’s sacrifice. Every time he opened his mouth, it was like he was testing her limitations.

To be the mate of a spymaster to the court with many faces, put a target on her back. He couldn’t defend her here. Not when they were in a pit of vipers, ready to strike at any time. It was safe to say Azriel was on high alert, more than usual.

His shadows slipped through the room, whispering to him things he would not feel and something like pride stirred in him as Lilith observed her not loose control. Even when she had every reason not to.

Lilith knew what the sorry example of the High Lord was nothing but a joke, and what words came out of his mouth was nothing but bullshit. She shouldn’t give it much thought. But it became personal when he started speaking about Feyre’s character, and about Nesta’s.

She felt the familiar tingling sensation in her fingers

Azriel was having problems with his restraint unravelling as Tamlin’s story carried on, dragging Rhysand’s name, twisting truths into something distorted. And then—he felt it, power rising edged with fury.  He silently sent his shadows in every corner of the room.

He felt Truth-Teller shifting, sliding a fraction from its sheath. His gaze snapped to Lilith, to the faint, unmistakable glow beginning in her eyes, in her hands. He tried to send something, anything down the bond, praying to the Mother that it would reach her.

Lilith wanted to tear Tamlin into pieces when a pang of fear and understanding hit her. She didn’t need to move to know it was Azriel’s emotions that somehow broke through her shields, reaching her. Surprisingly, it calmed her; she knew it wasn’t fear of her but for her.

Tamlin’s gaze flicked toward Cassian, then to the tendrils of shadow curling near Lilith. A mocking smirk spread across his face “Funny” He drawled “I see that’s not the only thing that runs in that family”

What came next, Lilith couldn’t control. A sharp laugh tore out of her

Tamlin’s lip curled “What is so amusing?”

Lilith gave a cold smile “You” She said “The entire Prythian stands on the brink of war, and you still can’t stop telling the tragic tale of the poor High Lord of Spring”

“That is not—” His mouth kept moving, but no sound followed

Lilith’s gaze slid to Rhysand. The High Lord only offered a slow, wicked smile.

The amount of selfishness between the courts and the utter lack of empathy for the innocent lives, let it be in lesser fae or humans, shifted something within Lilith. It just anger, it was deeper, ancient. It felt like a lock breaking open in her chest and what burst out was infinite.

She felt dizzy as she stood, the movement enough to draw attention from all. When she spoke, her voice was steady, quiet, but laced with power that did not belong to any court “Some of you have seen this war before” She said “You have watched it burn through lands and lives” Her gaze was cold as it slid across the room

“My sister and I” She glanced at Nesta “We were inside the Cauldron” A pause “We know what it is” – “What it wants”

Nesta rose beside her “We want one thing” She said sharp as a blade “To protect those who cannot protect themselves, fae or human, it makes no difference”

Her eyes hardened as they met each High Lord in turn “So tell me” – “What kind of rulers are you” She added with distaste “If you won’t even protect your own lands?”

A heartbeat of silence, then Feyre stood “These powers may once have belonged to you” Her voice calm and unyielding “But they are mine now” She continued “And I will use them” - “To protect what is mine”

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Her body still hummed with energy. Lilith had outburst before, but this was different she felt like she was on fire.

They came in the suite. Although Lilith wanted to be alone for awhile calm her powers down, Mor practically dragged her

“Well, I’m surprised you didn’t lose it” Rhysand said as the door clicked behind them.

“She did” Azriel teased. Shadows circled her once again, and their coolness was welcoming

Lilith playfully smacked his chest as they sat on a long settee. Rhysand and Feyre occupied the one that was on the opposite side. And Cassian, taking up the armchair

 “I controlled it” – “I wish I hadn’t” She looked at Feyre “You should have done more damage”

Feyre huffed a quiet laugh “Believe me, I wanted too”

A knock came from the door. Rhysand was already on his feet

 “Don’t open it” – “Even with the shields, don’t” Mor called out. Lilith sent a confused look at her

Rhysand opened the door to find Helion standing there, grinning.

The High Lord of Day, to Lilith’s surprise, was not so bad. From the minute he walked in, the “Bastard act” as he called it, dropped. He gave Lilith the same gracious bow as he did to Feyre.

His gaze was still on her “You” Lilith stiffened, as shadows moved, taking a defensive position.

“Forgive me” Helion stated “It’s just that I can sense your magic” – “But I can’t seem to pinpoint what it truly is” Spell-Cleaver they called him. Of all the High Lords, he should at least have had a guess.

Lilith snorted “Join the club”

He plopped himself beside Mor, “It’s been centuries” He said with a dramatic sigh “And you three haven’t accepted my offer”

“I don’t like to share” Mor exclaimed. Lilith blinked in confusion

“Helion likes both males and females in bed and has been gunning for those three to join him for centuries” Rhysand’s voice filled his mind.

The power that’s been buzzing within her, did not help at that statement. Something sharp flared in her chest before she could stop it, something close to jealousy. Her head turned slowly toward Azriel. Why did that bother her? It was the past. Things were different now.

Azriel, smoothly draped an arm over her shoulders, a calculated move. He tucked Lilith towards her, pulling her close. A barely visible smile painted his face at the reaction of his mate learning about what the offer was.

He met her gaze, an eyebrow lifted up in question. His eyes were searching her now flushed face.

The question on that smug face sent the jealousy flying away, replaced with completely different sensation. And when Azriel barely caught his lower lip between his teeth. Her mind played the flashes of the night where his hands were on her.

“Get a room” Mor shouted across to their High Lord and Lady.

Lilith snapped into reality.  She turned her gaze towards Mor, who was already looking at her You too she mouthed.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

She came back to an empty living room, her sisters already off to bed. It was not surprising, it was just, well, it was what it was

She walked towards the kitchen, praying to any God that atleast a glass of water would settle in her stomach.

She saw a light in her peripheral vision, she didn’t have to turn to know who it was

“I told you not to be awake Hanna”

There was no reply, but she heard the clatter of plates and pans, like always; Hanna made sure she had a plate of food every time she came back

Hanna placed the food on the table “And I told you it’s my duty not just as your handmaiden but also your friend to make sure you don’t go hungry to bed”

Lilith’s lip tilted up at the word friend, but it was gone in a heartbeat to see the food laid out. She gulped as she felt the all to familiar sensation again

Hanna gave her a familiar look, which told Lilith that if she didn’t eat, the whole lecture about pregnant women throwing up so many time that they practically lived in the toilets would come up again.

The difference they had life inside them, and hers was fading away  

“Don’t” Hanna said “Do not think you are going anywhere” It was assuming; this had happened a lot of times that Hanna was able to read her expressions

Lilith gave a knowing look as she spoonful of rice.

She finally reached her room after supper. Her mind was playing tricks on her, there was no bile in her throat. No sensation of throwing up or weakness. But she was barely able to eat anything, the memory coming in flashes. And with the power still buzzed within her, the feeling was not good, she left like she was going to combust.

Azriel was standing outside for a good minute, thinking whether to go in or not. Should I go in? He thought Will I be able to control? The dress she wore on top of the jealousy, that was written all over her face. It didn’t help at all.

His shadows kept whispering that they would be alert to stop him. They knew that it wasn’t-

“Planning to burn a hole through the door” Cassian voice cut through thoughts “Why you thinking so hard about this?”  He asked approaching beside him

Azriel didn’t answer; he just flicked his eyes towards the hall. And then back at Cassian

Cassian understood the warning – and didn’t care.

She didn’t have a chance to sit before a knock came from the door. She opened it, to find the two Illyrians standing there

Cassian grinned and entered like he owned the place. And then the other followed cloaked in shadows

Lilith arched a brow “Do I want to know?”

Cassian dropped onto the bed with a sigh “Probably not”

Azriel’s gaze lingered on her for a second too long “Rhys has my room shielded” Lilith said before either of them could speak

“I have wings” Cassian muttered, glancing around “And somehow you still get the bigger bed”

“Cass” Lilith warned.  He held up his hands in defeat

The humour quickly drained, as he said “Nesta”  His voice was serious now “She said something felt off” He paused “Wrong” He met Lilith’s eyes “Do you feel anything like that?”

Lilith blinked, caught off guard “No” She said automatically

She hesitated before adding “I’m more connected..to my powers” She furrowed her brows “Right now it’s closer to the surface than usual” She searched for the right words “Like it’s trying to get out”

She sighed  “It doesn’t feel good” Azriel straightened from where he was leaning on the wall

Lilith noticed that, and quickly added “But I’m fine” She didn’t sound convincing

Cassian pushed off the bed. “Right” He a glance to Azriel and then back to her “I’ll let Rhys know. He headed for the door without waiting for a response.

Azriel didn’t follow.

As soon as Cassian left, the room somehow felt smaller.

Lilith’s eyes flicked to the shadowsinger—his gaze already on her

“And” She drawled “What did you want?”

Azriel’s lips tilted up as he crossed the space between them. He had been holding back from the moment he saw her in that dress. Not anymore.

His hand came to her cheek, sliding to the nape of her neck as he pulled her in and kissed her.

The kiss was raw. Hungry. Her imagination had done it no justice.  Lilith’s arms circled his neck as she tilted her head, giving him more. When her teeth caught his lower lip, a low growl rumbled from him, deepening the kiss.

But he didn’t go further. Couldn’t. Wouldn’t—not here.

A soft whimper escaped her as they parted.

“Trust me, Angel” He murmured, his voice rough, sending a shiver down her spine “I’ve thought about it”

She couldn’t stop herself “What have you thought about?” Her voice was breathless

The hardness that pressed on her lower stomach was evident in the things he thought about “It doesn’t involve my family being around” He said quietly “Or yours”

Lilith didn’t move away, tilting her chin up instead.

“Or being in a pit of vipers”

That stopped her. The words hit like an ice wind. Lilith grunted as she pulled back, putting space between them before she lost control again.

Her gaze narrowed “So you came here just to torture me?”

Azriel didn’t move. A low chuckle left him “Believe me” He said “It’s nothing compared to the torture you’ve put me through”

Her brow arched in question

“The jealousy” He stated, his gaze dragging slowly over her “And that damned dress” He tapped the siphon at his wrist—the exact same shade of blue

Lilith cleared her throat “Anything else?” She could have stepped closer. Could have pushed. She didn’t. Because he was right.

Azriel stepped closer anyway, his control hanging by a thread. A shadow slipped forward, placing the dagger into his hand, the one he had made for her.

“Here” A wicked glint flashed in his eyes. “Tomorrow, we are not so friendly”

Lilith took it, mesmerised “Az…” She breathed, awe softening her voice “It’s beautiful”

She bit her lip—and his gaze dropped instantly

His control slipped another inch “You’re playing a dangerous game, Angel”

Gods, she should have stopped. But the look in his eyes, the warning in his tone, only made her want to push further.

“For someone who’s feared across Prythian”  Lilith’s brow lifted in challenge “You sure hesitate a lot”

Azriel’s eyes darkened at the challenge. In an instant he pressed Lilith to the wall, caging her in with his body “You are in trouble” He growled, voice rough.

The glint in Lilith’s eyes made all his control vanish. His mouth slammed down on hers in a devouring kiss. Lilith moaned into it, arms wrapping around his neck. This was what she wanted, the only thing that quieted the chaos outside when he held her like this. She bit his lip, and this time, Azriel didn’t hold back. Her power buzzed at her fingertips, threads of silver-blue sparking wildly; she was hot, desperate. Instinct took over as she wrapped one leg around his waist and rolled her hips. Another moan escaped her at the feel of his hard length pressing against her.

One hand slid down to grip her hip. The other tangled in her hair, tilting her head so he could kiss her deeper. When she rocked against him, desperate and needy, Azriel shifted without thinking, sliding one thick, muscled thigh firmly between her legs.

Shifting the fabric of her dress, she ground down on his thigh. The angle was perfect, the hard muscle pressing right where she ached most. The friction sent jolts of pleasure shooting through her. Her hand went straight to his cock, rubbing the thick length through his leathers.

She stroked him from base to tip, thumb brushing over the swollen head where he was already leaking.

 A low groan tore from his throat “Fuck” He hissed against her mouth, hips jerking into her touch. The bond roared in his chest, demanding he claim her, mark her, bury himself inside what was his. His shadows tugged sharply at his shoulders in warning, trying to pull him back

Her grip tightened “Lily” He moaned her name like a prayer “Fuck —just like that”

Shadows brushed lightly along Lilith’s inner thigh and neck with affection. They loved her too much to fully stop this. The dual sensation of cool shadows on her heated skin sent her riding harder, faster “Az, gods — this feels so good” Her other hand clutched his shoulder, nails digging in.

Azriel’s breath came fast and ragged. He gripped her ass with one hand, helping guide her frantic movements on his thigh, while the other braced against the wall. He dropped his mouth to her neck, sucking and biting at the sensitive skin just below her ear, leaving marks that clothing would hide tomorrow

“You’re so fucking wet” He growled against her throat, voice dark and filthy “I can feel you through my leathers” Lilith’s breath panted, her movements growing wilder “I know you’re close” His voice dropped even lower “Come for me, Angel”

Compelled by his words, Lilith pressed her head to his chest, muffling a sharp cry as her orgasm crashed over her in waves. Threads of silver-blue power flew around them, mingling with the shadows.

The feeling of her falling apart on his thigh, the way she clenched and shuddered against him, pushed Azriel over the edge right after her. He groaned deep and guttural, hips jerking as he spilled hot and hard into his leathers, pulsing under the steady stroke of her hand.

They stayed pressed together for a long moment, panting, bodies still buzzing with aftershocks. Azriel wrapped an arm around Lilith’s waist, holding her firmly on his thigh as she rode out the final tremors.

“You are cruel, Angel”  He whispered roughly, brushing his knuckles along the side of her face “You make me lose every last ounce of control”

Lilith let out a breathless laugh, cheeks flushed, legs still shaky as she leaned into him “Good. Because you make me lose every bit of mine”

He tilted her chin up and kissed her again - softer this time, then deeper, the heat between them still simmering beneath the surface.

There was a heartbeat of silence “Tomorrow’s meeting is going to be hell” He murmured against her lips, the weight of Dawn Court and the gathering High Lords pressing in on him. “But I don’t regret anything.”

Lilith smiled softly. “I don’t either.”

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Morning came too soon, Azriel had been on edge long before she walked in. He felt her before he saw her, the shift in the air, the wrongness through the bond. Lilith stepped into the foyer, clad in Illyrian leathers, dagger strapped to her thigh, something in his chest tightened. She looked like herself, but she did not feel like herself.

Power clung to her. Not the steady burn he had come to recognise, but something uncontrollable, waiting for release.

And then she looked at him “What is wrong?” His voice came out sharper than intended.

She sat between him and Feyre, the seat he had saved for her. His hand slid beneath the table immediately, fingers closing around her wrist. He flinched “Your burning up, Lily” It wasn’t like the heat yesterday when they were close, it was like a fever either.

No this was something else; wrong that prickled his skin.

Her eyes moved too carefully taking in her surroundings before action. White wings crossed his peripheral vision, Thesan entering, Seraphim at his back. The other High Lords followed shortly after, power brushing against power in suffocating waves. But Azriel’s mind was occupied by what was wrong with his mate.

“What’s wrong?” Feyre’s voice echoed in Lilith’s mind calm yet concerned

Lilith’s reply came too fast “I don’t know Feyre… but something is—I don’t feel right.” Her voice fractured “Tell Az… please tell Az there is something wrong—not with me” –  “Let them all know that what Nesta felt was right”

Azriel’s gripped tighten on her hand as he heard the message from his High Lady.

Azriel barely registered the High Lords taking their seats, Rhys beginning the meeting, words being exchanged about the war, alliances, Hybern. None of it mattered. Because the power inside Lilith—was building.

His shadows recoiled as the felt it too. That never happened. The shadows had loved Lilith since the beginning. They sometimes even disobeyed him when it came to her.

Her fingers trembled under his, as the voice came in her head “Come to me” They laughed “Use me by your will” –“We’ll tell you all our true secrets”

Azriel’s full focus was on her as she gazed up to the window. Too still, she was too still

Someone got up and ran, “I” Nesta’s voice broke his focus “Something is wrong” she terribled as she clutched her stomach and hurled

Azriel snapped his head back to Lilith gripping her arm as she stared at the sky, lips moving soundlessly.

“I—” Nesta voice broke, raw, terrified. “Something is very wrong” - “Not with us—” she gasped, and threw up once again.

Cassian lunged for her. “Nesta—”

“Don’t touch me!” She cried, shaking, eyes wide with horror “It’s calling”

Azriel moved in front of Lilith without thinking, hands cupping her face, forcing her to look at him “Lily” Her eyes were unfocused “Angel, look at me”

Her lips parted taking a shallow breath “The book—” That was all she got out before silver-blue threads sparked from her skin.

Helion leaned forward, eyes sharp. Across the room Beron rose to this feet  “What in the Cauldron—”  He snapped

“Sit down” Rhys snarled, power cracking like lightning through the chamber.

The floor began to shake, violently. The entire Dawn Court palace shuddered as if something beneath it had awakened.

And then— silence.

Lilith collapsed forward, gasping. Azriel caught her before she hit the ground. The power was completely gone. The heat completely vanished

She shoved out of his grip, stumbling toward the window. Azriel followed her, his gaze now fell on what had happened and this blood turn to ice

The Wall—was gone, rubbing into pieces across Prythian

Rhys breathed, low and deadly “Hybern”

𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪

Note: I hope you guys lied it. I kept debating if i shout add Lilith riding Az, but idk it just felt right.

I know it's taking longer than usual, but i need to have a certain state of mind to write Lily's character.

My Taglist <3: @the-onlyy-angie @lreadsstuff @xadenswhore @willowpains @secretsicanthideanymore @a-chegwidden @tele86 @i-am-infinite @booksbypisces @anon1227 @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @sophieliz @nebarious @whore-of-many-hot-men @art1012 @plants-w0rld @bruuuuuuuuuuuuh @mitziix @annamariereads16 @illustrioussanctuarystatue @goldenlove1665 @madeofeverythingjuice @regulusblackstar @wickedpyro @littleemissperfecttt @nikfigueiredo @celestialgilb @thelady-of-dragonfire @ogscoobydoobysnacks @namelesssav @smashee0789 @littowl @watermelomsuger @trippiehippieashley @aurora-maria

[steveslevis]

on thin ice

hockey star!az x premed/nerdy!reader

summary: azriel is a senior at the university of michigan and the star center and captain of their hockey team. it seems like he has everything a man could ever ask for—good grades, loyal teammates, top pick in the nhl draft, girls falling all over him all the time…

but then you come along—his anatomy lab partner for the semester.

you’re a quiet, closed off sophomore studying neuroscience, and you’ve never heard of him—haven’t even watched a single hockey game in your life.

azriel doesn’t know how you fit into his life and why you seem to throw such a wrench into his future plans—but he does know that he has to have you, and he’ll stop at nothing to make sure you see that he’s something that you can let yourself have.

series warnings: violence (it’s hockey), my minimal hockey knowledge (but extensive anatomy knowledge), pining and yearning, azriel is down bad and reader is too scared, mentions of past trauma, anxious!reader, panic attacks, eventual smut

add yourself to the taglist

one (coming soon!)

[violetscar656]

Well, I wrote an Eris fanfic, and it's not showing in the latest updates. I don't know if it's a glitch or something else. So, creating this post just in case. If anybody knows, please lemme know

Part1

[violetscar656]

The Snowflake and The Fire

Summary: They met Under the Mountain. Carved a thin slice of happiness from the misery. But all things changed after she got to know what he was hiding.

Warnings: Lil angst, soft Eris?, female reader , Non-canon

Author's Note: Hi guys, please go a little easy on me. This is the first time I'm writing Eris. The idea came to me when i was writing my other ACOTAR series. I think it would be like a 3 parts thing. Anways ENJOY!

Italic sentences mean past memories.

He saw her again at the summons of the High Lords; he saw her usual glowing skin now, now had a grey sheen to it. His heart twisted.  The sharp bob of pale-blonde hair, normally so bright it bordered on white, hung dull and brittle around her face. And she had become thin. Too thin. His jaw clenched. By the Mother, she had looked better under the Mountain.

His gaze went to her eyes; that fire in them didn’t dim, not even close. Fragile hope filled his chest.

His father whispered something to him about the High Lady of Night's power, and he just nodded, going along. He didn’t care. Not when she was sitting right opposite to him, still burning

She knocked on the door

“Ember!” Mor exclaimed, “Come in”

Ember slipped inside, brows rising when she spotted the High Lord of Day himself lounging in an armchair like he owned the room “Are you still trying to get them together?” She asked dryly.

Helion’s unsuccessful attempts to convince the Illyrians, Azriel and Cassian, and Mor to join him in bed, all at once.

Helion pressed a hand to his chest “A male can hope”

Ember only shook her head, lips twitching despite the exhaustion shadowing her features.

Her gaze shifted to Rhysand and Feyre. The soft smile she gave them was real “I never got the chance to thank you” She said quietly “For everything” Everyone knew Feyre, Cursebreaker. But Rhysand… Rhysand had helped her more times than anyone realised. He and-

“You don’t need to be so formal with us, Ember” Rhysand said “You’re a friend”

Something flickered in her eyes at that. Gratitude. Weariness. And beneath it all, that same unbroken spark.

Ember had gone along with Mor and Helion for as long as she could stand it, laughing when expected, playing along with Helion’s theatrics. But the moment the teasing shifted toward something heated, she slipped out.

“I see your taste has changed” Eris calmly said, blocking her path towards her room

She tried to sidestep him. He moved with her, blocking her again

“Move” She snapped

Eris smirked “Not in the mood to play, little fire?”

Rage shot through her veins. Before he could blink, her hand wrapped around his throat, slamming him back against the wall.

Eris didn’t fight. His eyes glittered with something dark “I remember when you liked me doing this” He rasped

Ember’s grip tightened “You let her die” Each word as sharp as a blade. Eris’s smirk faltered

“You knew” She hissed “You knew about the forty babes in my home, and you did nothing”

All colour drained from his face. The spark in his eyes dimmed, replaced by something hollow. Haunted. For a heartbeat, he looked like a ghost.

Her hand trembled with fury before she released him. He didn’t chase her. Didn’t speak. Didn’t even breathe as she brushed past. Just like before, he let her walk away. Again.

°❆⋆ঌ.࿐

Winter was building itself again.The war had taken a toll on everyone, but her home, her people, had endured. The number of soldiers had thinned, though not by much. Winter warriors were trained differently, conditioned from the earliest ranks to withstand nearly anything. Resilient. Unyielding.

Ember stood in the first snowfall of the Winter Solstice month, letting the flakes settle on her face. It was ritual, memory, and prayer all at once. Her mother once told her she was born on the first snowfall of this very month. It was considered a blessing in Winter Court tradition.

The irony of naming her Ember had never been lost on her.

“Ember! Get in!” Her brother’s voice drifted from the doorway

“Coming, Kal” She called back

Still, she lingered a heartbeat longer, closing her eyes, whispering the same small wish she offered every year. A small and silent prayer for her mother, for her family.

As soon as she stepped inside, Viviane and Kallias broke into song.

“Happy birthday to you…”

Ember froze. Fifty years. Fifty years of not celebrating her birthday with her sister and her brother. Amarantha ensured Kallias was kept far from her. The separation had ached, but it was also a reminder of that day-

Ember could see the first snow fall, “Well, Happy Birthday, Ember” She told herself, blowing on the candle and a piece of cupcake she stole from the kitchens

“Well, isn’t this….cute? Sad?” A voice drawled. She whipped her head to see Autumn’s Heir standing leaning against the wall, arms crossed, amber eyes glinting.

She didn’t bother hiding her annoyance “It’s none of your concern, Eris” – “Or are you going to report me for just celebrating my birthday quietly?” She shot back

“I should? Shouldn’t I?” He gave a lazy, practised smirk

Ember glared at him “Do whatever pleases you”

Winter Court members who’d survived Under the Mountain were used to cruelty, used to being watched and judged. She didn’t flinch anymore. Not even from him, not from anyone.

Eris' unusual calm demeanour, cracked, as if he knew exactly where her mind went “Happy Birthday, Winter Princess” His voice softened. With that, he left.

She blew out the candles, laughter catching in her throat as she embraced her sister and her brother “Thank you, Kal” She murmured

Kallias’s eyes softened. He brushed a gentle hand down her back, a slow, grounding stroke she remembered from childhood.

Viviane, incapable of containing her excitement, grabbed Ember’s arm “Come, come” She urged, practically vibrating.

They walked down the hallway together, and when Ember stepped into her chamber, her jaw dropped.

“VIV!” Her eyes widened. Piles of wrapped boxes, silver, blue, white, and glittering, covered half the room.

Viviane only chuckled. “Half of them are from our court” She said delightfully

“You’ve made such good connections with the other courts these past months” - “What was I supposed to do?” Viviane teased “Turn them away?”

Ember huffed a soft laugh, overwhelmed. She didn’t even know where to begin, so she reached for the smaller boxes

Vivaiane turned halfway to the door “Oh” She paused “Before I forget”

She took out a letter and a small red box from her dress pocket “These also came” She whispered

Ember’s breath hitched, seeing the maple stamp on the letter. Her fingers froze. She lifted her gaze to Viviane, who tried, unsuccessfully, to hide the concern tightening her mouth.

Ember shook her head. Viviane was the only one she had ever told. One night months ago, when the pain wouldn’t quiet, when Ember was torn between duty and longing, between truth and the memory of a male she lost and a male she still feared wanting.

“Does—”

“No,” Viviane cut her off gently. “Kallias doesn’t have a clue.” Her brows furrowed in concern “Are you sure you don’t want to tell him?” Ember nodded

Not yet. Maybe not ever

She unlocked the small wooden box on her dresser, lined with simple magic to protect its contents. Inside were several similar maple-stamped letters, all untouched.  She added the new letter and the red box to the pile, unopened, unread, and closed the lid.

The room felt quieter for it. Heavier.

°❆⋆ঌ.࿐

“You What?” Viviane and Ember said in unison

Kallias raised his brows “Umm” –“I seem to miss a few details” His knowing look flicked between his mate and his sister

“It’s nothing” Viviane said too quickly

Ember cleared her throat “Autumn has never been kind to us” She slipped into her emissary role with ease  “Why must we entertain this?”

Kallias took a slow breath, choosing his words carefully “It’s a crowning” He said “We all knew Eris would take the throne” He paused, holding up the letter in his hand “This is to make it official”

“It’s not like he is becoming the High Lord” Viviane mumbled

Kallias sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose “Look, I don’t want to argue.” His tone shifted to the authority of Winter “Em, you’re going”- “And that is final”

Ember didn’t sleep that night. She couldn’t. She lay awake in her bed, every thought circling back to the same reality: She would have to see him. Speak to him. Stand before him without Viviane at her side, without Kallias’s quiet strength in the corner of the room.

No safety net. No excuses.

Her stomach twisted. Her breath came too fast. Anxiety flashed through her body. She pressed a hand to her chest, willing her heartbeat to steady.

She’d faced Amarantha. She’d survived Under the Mountain. She’d walked through war and blood and loss.

But the thought of seeing him again, that was the thing that kept her wide awake until dawn.

°❆⋆ঌ.࿐

“Eris” His mother’s voice came, soft, cracked, but also commanding. He stopped in the hallway

He turned, immediately and stepped into her chamber “Ma” He said gently “I told you to be careful”

She lifted a trembling hand and touched his right cheek, fingers brushing the faded bruise that still lingered “What did he do to you, my sweet boy?”

Eris’s expression shifted, all sharpness dissolving for her alone “Better me than you” He whispered.

She swallowed hard, blinking rapidly “Apply the salve I gave you last time” She said “Do not forget this time” Eris nodded

A heartbeat went by before she asked “Did you get any word?”

“Lucien is safe” Eris answered automatically “He’s adjusting”

Her head snapped toward him with a look that pinned his gaze on the ground “I know that” She said “I wasn’t asking about him”

Eris inhaled sharply and blinked once, hard “Not that I know of” He said, steadying his voice into something neutral.

She straightened, her gaze turning razor-sharp and unbearably tender all at once “A mother knows, Eris” She used the same tone when he was young and got caught lying. Every time he lied to protect her, to protect himself, to protect someone else he cared about

He said nothing.

Eris lay on his bed, the room dark except for the soft glow of the fireplace. He held the letter in his hands, reading it for what felt like the hundredth time.

To the Crowned Prince of Autumn,

I’m pleased to inform you that Winter will be attending the celebration of your official title. Our emissary, Ember, would be there two nights before the celebration.

Please take the necessary steps to accommodate her

Sign Kallias

His breath left him in a slow, shuddering exhale. Two nights early. Alone. No sister. No High Lord. No buffer. Just her.

He closed his eyes, gripping the parchment tight enough that it crinkled. The bruise on his cheek throbbed dully, an echo of his father’s temper, of the endless performance he played at court.

But this…this hurt in a different way. This he felt in his soul.

Ember is coming here, he thought to himself. And Mother help him, because he wasn’t ready.

°❆⋆ঌ.࿐

They sat together at one of Amarantha’s forced celebrations, something Ember never attended unless ordered. Gods knew how, Eris had convinced her to go with him.

“So” Ember muttered, turning her head toward him “What is this about?”

Eris didn’t answer. His eyes were fixed on the females offering dances to the males, hips swaying, mouths painted with the promise of distraction. The wine was working through his system, he was on his sixth glass.

Ember huffed “Why am I not surprised?” she muttered under her breath.

Sometime late, she got up and gave a gracious bow to Amarantha, Her stomach churned, bile rising in her throat. She gave a nod and got dismissed.

Ember fled

A knock sounded at her door not long after. She opened it, and of course, there he stood Eris. Smug smile. Stinking of perfume and liquor. Ember scrunched her nose in disgust.

“What do you want?” She demanded

“You left early” Eris slurred

“You're drunk” Eris furrowed his brow “Oh! I thought we were stating obvious facts” Ember said dryly

“You missed all the fun” He gave a smug smirk, stepping inside  

“You might enjoy half-naked female rubbing against you” – “I certainly don’t” She snapped back

“Hmmmm” He prowled forward. Ember stepped back until her spine hit the wall “How about a male?” He purred

Then his mouth was on hers, rough, uninvited. Ember shoved him off with a snarl and slapped him. Hard. The sound cracked through the air.

She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand

“Get.Out” She growled

He left. And everything shattered. Both of them knew what that moment meant, how it tore their careful balancing act apart.

What Ember didn’t expect was everything that came after. The slow shedding of his mask whenever they were alone. The quiet apologies he didn’t know how to speak aloud. The attachment that built itself through nights of whispered truths and stolen moments until a single day without him felt like a wound.

She sighed. She didn’t know why she thought about those memories, didn’t know why she tortured herself like that. Her mind just won’t listen to her sometimes.

She rubbed her eyes as she got up from the bed. She splashed cold water on her face. And saw her reflection in the mirror. Time had changed her. A hollow of the beauty she once was.

Eris laughed “Hey-hey” he chucked “Stop” he caught an arm, as the other continued

Ember grinned “Who would have thought” She tickled him again “That Eris Vanessra would be so ticklish?” He caught the other hand and pulled her close

“Only you” She felt his breath, as he leaned in closer –

Ember clenched her jaw tight, staring at her reflection

He knew, about the babes, about the attack. He knew. And she wouldn’t forget that, couldn’t. Not ever

She descended the stairs, staring at the bags waiting by the door. Going to Autumn Court, being in the same space as him, felt like standing on the edge of a cliff, scared but also something else she refused to acknowledge. Her loyalty to Kallias mattered more than anything she felt. Or didn’t want to feel.

Kallias met her at the landing, worry carved into his silver-lined gaze “Ready?” He asked softly. Ember nodded.

“Now listen to me” He said, voice gentle. The brother she knew, even as it carried the authority of a High Lord “Don’t let them get under your skin” Another nod.

“Write to me every day” He added, eyes softening “I’ll miss you”

She couldn’t trust her voice, so she didn’t reply. She simply picked up her bags and stepped outside. And left for Autumn Court.

₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡˚₊ ⋆꙳❅*‧ ₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡˚₊ ⋆꙳❅*‧ ₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡˚₊ ⋆꙳❅*‧ ₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡˚₊ ⋆꙳❅*‧ ₊˚｡⋆❆⋆｡

Note: I really hope you guys liked it, i always felt Eris, just would have a soft side, you know.

Comments are open, please let me know what you think.

[violetscar656]

Court of Calm Chaos - Series List (Ongoing)

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

[xoxochb]

me staying up late to read fanfictions when I know I’m supposed to be asleep

[violetscar656]

Court of Calm Chaos - Chapter 6

Summary: After the battle in the Summer Court, something shift inside Lilith, as she and Azriel grow closer. And her new family is able to get her out of her shell.

Warnings: Mature content, 18+ (just a few sentences), dealing with loss in an unhealthy way, alcohol

Authors Note: Hi guys! Finally this chapter is here. I had so much fun writing it, I hope you guys enjoy. Comments are open to all.

Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5

Lilith sat on the floor near the fire, her stable hands still coated with the marks she left on the male’s today. She had attacked them, but in defence. She felt a presence beside her. Feyre squeezed Lilith’s hand; she looked up to see her sister’s worried gaze.  Lilith shook her head and turned her gaze towards the fire.

Lilith knew why the male attacked her; she had roamed those woods enough to know what was going to happen if she didn’t. She saw that hunger in his eyes; he had pinned her to a tree. She didn’t hesitate when she took her dagger out and stabbed him, didn’t hesitate when she pinned him to the floor and held it to his throat. The man stayed motionless, his eyes now showed horror, the familiar metallic scent hit the cold air-

“Lilypad”, She jolted at the voice of her father “It’s late” Her father looked at her with a worried gaze. Indeed, it was late when all her sisters went to sleep

She got up, mustering a smile, “Goodnight Father” she said as she headed inside

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

The sound of metal clashing against metal, of screaming, and orders being shouted filled the air. Lilith’s breath came in ragged gasps as she yanked her dagger free from another Hybern soldier. She wasn’t in the heart of the battle, but still, she was here. When she first saw the battlefield, her body slipped into a strange yet familiar cold calm. She was fighting despite Feyre’s protests.

She fought side by side with fae she didn’t recognise; Lilith just knew her targets. Her power buzzing underneath her skin, spiralling. She released just enough magic to make an oncoming arrow miss. She wasn’t sure how she ended up surrounded by five soldiers closing in on her in a circle.

Two lunged, and she dodged to the side. But the sword hit her shoulder, a tingling at first, but then pain rippled through her arm. Lilith bared her teeth.

Now.

She loosened the leash on the magic, twisting and turning the very metal armour that protected them, into shards of steel moving inwards, piercing their bodies. They cried in pain, hitting the ground “It’s—” a soldier choked out, staring at her in horror  “It’s you” Then silence

Lilith entered the palace doors. She was thankful for the fae healing, as the wound was now almost half closed. She scanned the place for any familiar face; the soldiers of night and summer alike were around, nursing their wounds.

“Where are you?” Lilith sighed in relief as Feyre’s voice echoed in her mind

“Palace entry” She replied

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

“You are no less of a fool than the General” Madja said. She had come to the Town House, on the High Lady's orders, to have the Inner Circle checked up after the battle “Getting reckless, like this” she shook her head “On a battlefield”

Tarquin, the High Lord of Summer, was thankful enough to forgive the ‘unfortunate incident’ as he put it, as Night was the only one who came to their aid.

Lilith had put him in his place after she had seen through his denial of what Feyre and Rhysand were trying to explain

Lilith had just walked up to them, and calmly told “I do not have any ties with you, High Lord of Summer” – “Nor any responsibilities in the Court I reside in” She glanced at Feyre and Rhysand “And yet I stand here fighting for the lives of your Court” – “And yes I know what you think” She paused “If the book was still here it wouldn’t come to this”

She looked to Tarquin, “If the book was still here” – “It would have been, much, much worse” – “And I think deep down you know it too”

Lilith winced at Madja’s sharp tone as she healed her; she didn’t even know there were wounds on her legs and back

“Thank you, Madja” Lilith said with a smile,

“Wait” Lilith saw the healer’s solemn face “I need to do one more test” Lilith opened her mouth to protest “No question, Lilith” Madja’s tone was final “Come to the clinic in 2 days”

Lilith gave a nod to the Healer as she walked her out.

That night, Lilith held the note in one hand and a mug of steaming tea in another. It wasn’t the first time she had had the dream about being in the Cauldron. But were they dreams, though? The taunts from it were quite specific, Bring her to me, it had told Lilith.

She sat in the armchair. Lilith needed answers, not just about the dreams, but this newfound sensation of longing she felt. But it felt far off, not inside her but reaching to her

She glanced at the note again, whispering to the empty room,“Yours, Azriel”

He was gone, to where, well, she didn’t know; his spymaster duties. Lilith knew it was far and dangerous to some level, as none of the shadows remained.

She missed them, had gotten attached to them. Even on the battlefield, one of the shadows remained with her. Lilith chuckled at the memory of the tiny shadow slipping from her hair after they landed back in Velaris. Azriel was gone by then, and it had followed him.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

At dawn, standing on the training field, much smaller than the one in the Wind House and without the protection wards

There are no protection wards on the battlefield, Lilith thought to herself. She began setting up different target boards and a training dummy in front of her. On the ground were different swords and daggers.

She started training with the dummy, releasing bits of magic towards the sword and daggers; few hit the targets, others missed. She remembered Mor’s comment Any target missed is an enemy approaching you closer. She tried again, and again, her physical focus elsewhere, when her magic focus was somewhere different

Her jaw clenched as the mocking of Cauldron ran in her head, “That’s all you can do, bend some objects?”

Lilith halted, as her ears began to ring with the screams and shouts of the innocent people of the Summer Court. Something shifted within her as her power buzzed; this time, she didn’t leash it as it blew in streaks of blue and silver.

Lilith panted as she saw the image before her: the boards, shattered, and the dummy in half. A satisfying grin crossed her face. And she continued

A faint gasp came from a distance. Lilith whipped her head, eyes widening in surprise to see Feyre standing there, looking utterly shocked. Lilith just gave an awkward wave to her sister. This was the first time she was seeing her powers

They walked inside the house and settled down

“I wanted to check up on you” Feyre said with worry, no pleasantries then – straight to the point, Lilith noted

 “Lily” =  “The battle I know how difficult it must-

“I’m fine, re-re” Lilith didn’t let her complete the sentence. Feyre was always worried; she always thought the silence Lilith had after attacking any male was of guilt

“Please don’t lie to me” Feyre's voice was full of concern

How can I explain to her that I am totally fine? That guilt and shame of killing never dawned on me; ever. Lilith sighed, “I am not” She held Feyre’s hand “Truly”

Feyre opened her mouth to protest, as footsteps approached “There you are, darling” Rhysand took a seat next to her “I've been wondering where you went” Lilith took a long breath of relief, mouthing a ‘Thank you’ towards Rhysand  

“Illyrian baby” Feyre teased as he elbowed him gently

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith and Rhysand entered the House of Wind,

“Before Cass gets here” Rhysand said, “I heard what you were thinking” Lilith's brows furrowed

Rhysand sighed, “The conversation with Feyre when she asked how you were”

Lilith's eyes widen “Rhys, why did-” – “You practically shouted the thought” – “I can't control it all the time” Rhysand explained with apologetic eyes.

Rhysand held her shoulders “But I’d like you to know it’s completely fine” – “Feeling like that, I mean”

He stood up straight, an odd spark in his eye “You need to work on your mental shields” He said defiantly

Lilith narrowed her eyes “Yes, High Lord” She gave a mocking bow; her brother-in-law just laughed

Lilith watched the glow of the sunset. She shook her head, seeing Cassian arriving with Mor, and Lilith hugged the female with a smile.

Cassian pouted, “What? I don’t get the same welcome”

Lilith chuckled and hugged him “You were supposed to be here an hour ago” Cassian held his hand up in defeat

As they sat together, “You fought well” Cassian said, pride in his voice. A warm feeling spread in Lilith’s chest. Mor had told her that, but to hear it from the General of the Night Court’s army, well, she didn’t know how to react. Lilith grinned and nodded.

“So will you be going to the Court of Nightmares?” Lilith asked Mor

Mor tisked, “I have to” – “I know where Keir keeps his treasures”

They had spoken about the mirror, how to obtain it; if asking won't help, stealing would. Lilith would not be joining them. Unfortunately, she had a different task, with Azriel not here and Nesta with Amren—

“How do you feel about seeing Elain?” Mor questioned,

Lilith blinked “Well” She took a long breath “I think I should be with her” – “I know things have been” She glanced at them “Awkward” Cassian huffed “But well, it is what it is”

“You guys need to show up in Hewn, Nesta and Amren are working on the book” – “I understand why Feyre and Rhys asked me for this” Lilith shrugged

Mor wrapped a comforting arm around Lilith “Well, let's loosen up for tomorrow's event” She said in a baby-cute voice that had Lilith and Cassian laughing.

After dinner, one drink turned into two, it became three as Cassian and Mor shared the experiences of the last war. Lilith was on her fourth glass; she was on the fine line of somewhere between tipsy and drunk.

Mor poured another glass for herself “I can't wait for this to get over” – “I want the normal back”

Normal, that word, sent Lilith to chug the remaining amber liquor

“What is normal?” Lilith began

“Huh?” Mor said

Lilith hugged the pillow, drooping towards the side “When I was young, normal was to play with my sisters, to sit in my father’s study” Lilith slurred her words “Normal was to play the piano in front of everyone before we had to sell it” Lilith sighed

She was pouring herself another glass, Mor was about to stop her, but Cassian stopped her “Let her speak this”

Lilith took a huge sip “In the cottage when Feyre was there, normal was hunting, protecting, making sure everyone was fed” Her words slurred more now.

She forgot the pillow and sat hunched “But when she left, and we got the riches back, normal was being alone, going to treatment alone” her hand was tilting to left and right with every sentence

Lilith looked out to the sky from the balcony  “Survival mode was normal” Lilith chuckled “And then I got here” Lilith pointed to the ground. With lips pouted, she looked at Mor and Cassian, who were listening with interest.

Lilith finished her glass “I thought everything would be fine” – “New body, New life” Lilith let out a dry laugh “Nope” Lilith said, emphasising the ‘p’ “Feyre gone” – “Unknown magic” = “War” Each statement was told in a half laugh.

She took a huge gulp of drink and growled out “Idiotic dreams about the fucking Cauldron”

Suddenly, Lilith’s gaze went to the corridor where all the rooms were. Cassian and Mor follow her gaze and then look at her in surprise

“That voice” Lilith said her tone more stable than before, a seriousness in the tone

Cassian and Mor shared a look “What voice?” the former asked

Lilith looked between them, glass in hand “It sounds familiar” – “I think it is him” – “No, I KNOW” – “I heard him” – “I'm 98…no 99% sure, it was him” Lilith emptied her glass

Lilith popped her legs up “Idiotic shadow boy” She slurred

Mor couldn’t help but laugh. Cassian was grinning at Lilith,

“With those eyes” – “That smile” Lilith mumbled as her eyes drifted shut

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Soft, silky sheets were what she felt, as her senses came back. Lilith’s eyes were shut; she didn’t want to open them

The smell of cedar hit her, followed by coffee and eggs. She stirred; it was too damn tempting

Lilith opened her eyes and sat up, adjusting to the blinding light and the pounding headache. She took her black blanket away

Wait? Black? Lilith looked around the room, a heart pounding, soft grey walls, black silk sheets, a dresser on the opposite side, and so many weapons. Lilith gasped, the smell of cedar and night-chilled hitting her

Fuck ! What was I doing in Azriel’s room? She got up and bolted out

Lilith sat on the dining table, not able to meet Cassian and Mor’s eyes,

“Morning, Lil” Cassian said in a singing voice. Lilith gave a small wave

After eating some of her food, Lilith couldn’t take it anymore. She put her spoon down with more force than necessary “Both of you are just going to pretend?”

Mor arched a brow “What happened?” She said teasingly, “We are not pretending”

“Oh shut up” Lilith retorted “How did I end up” She paused, warmth creeping in her face “In Azriel’s room?” Her voice became a loud whisper

They both laughed as Lilith looked between them, “So you truly don’t remember?” Cassian said in the midst of laughter

“No, I don’t” Lilith exclaimed

“Okay, okay” Mor said between chuckles “What’s the last thing you remember?”

Lilith thought about last night, the normal topics, the details of the previous war,

Lilith gasped, her hand covering her mouth, the ranting about normalcy, the piano, the survival, the confessions she made about him.

“I walked there by myself” Lilith said, not able to admit the truth

“Hmm” Mor's voice came “And said something about finishing what almost happened” She paused “What almost happened, Lilyyy?”

Lilith remembered the day he left for Winter Court, the closeness between them. She could still feel his breath

“Look at you” Cassian huffed, “Someone has a little crush” He smirked. Little crush was an understatement.

Lilith cleared her throat “I’ll finish this in my room” Her voice was less stable than usual

She shut the door with laughter still reaching; Lilith couldn’t help but smile. Might be, just might be, they knowing wasn’t a big deal.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

After making sure Cassian and Mor don’t say a word to anyone, especially not Feyre, they agreed, but Lilith highly doubted that.  They all winnowed to the Town House. It was almost time for the others to go when Mor grabbed Lilith and took to her bedroom

Lilith raised a brow “What's wrong?”

“I wanted to speak with you, before we leave” Mor said “Last night” Lilith winced, remembering what happened,

“Yesterday” Mor tone was gentle yet serious “That was normal, Lily”

Lilith's lips parted “We don’t know how the next few weeks would go” Mor's eyes showed fear for the first time.

“Llly, you live by now” – “Don’t hold back, if the war comes tomorrow, you live today”

“I don’t know what you mean, Mor” Lie, but she had to try

Mor gave a dry laugh “Seriously?”-“After hearing your confessions?” – “After knowing what you feel for Az?” she paused “Tell him”

Lilith shook her head vigorously “What if he doesn’t-”

“What if he does?”  Mor said, she held Lilith's hand, taking a long breath, “I have known Az for many years, Rhys and Cas even longer” – “And trust me when I say, he is different with you” Her eyes were pleading “At least try” Lilith nodded, not knowing what to say

Elain either stayed in her bedroom or wandered out to sit in the garden. Feyre had warned Lilith not to push her, to ask gently. So Lilith did. And she understood, everyone carried trauma differently, and healing never looked the same twice.

They walked into the living room together, Elain silent as ever.

“Would you like some tea?” Lilith asked.

Elain nodded, and Lilith offered her a soft smile. Small steps.

They settled into the armchairs by the fireplace. Lilith felt a strange unease; she was far more comfortable with books and training than with delicate conversations like this. But she would try.

“Nesta…” Elain’s voice was barely a whisper. “She was wrong” Elain finally lifted her gaze, looking directly at Lilith for the first time.

Lilith’s eyes widened a fraction, and she nodded.

Time went by in silence. Nuala had given Lilith one of Nesta’s books, knowing her taste, it was the smutty romance kind. Lilith had thanked her and began reading.

The clock chimed, breaking her concentration. Seven o’clock. An hour before dinner, Lilith didn’t know how to get Elain moving more. She had an idea, but—

“I’m going to bake a pie” Lilith announced to no one in particular, remembering the days she and Elain baked together when they were young “Would you like to oversee?” or bake with me left unsaid, Elain shook her head

Lilith didn’t push. She simply walked into the kitchen and whispered something to Nuala and Cerridwen.

A few minutes later, Elain heard a sharp curse. Then Lilith’s dramatic groan: “This is so wrong! Why do I take on tasks I can’t handle?”

Elain rose from her chair and made her way to the kitchen. She paused in the doorway.

Flour dusted the counter like snow. Cracked eggshells and dirty bowls were scattered the counter. Lilith stood in the centre of it all, looking like a guilty child caught red-handed

“Lily” Elain’s voice was barely a whisper. Lilith sheepishly smiled at her “Sorry, Elain, I” She raised her hands sticky with dough

Elain stepped forward without a word. She began cleaning the mess, her movements slow but steady. Lilith watched her sister, a quiet warmth blooming in her chest.

Once the space was clear, Elain moved to the bowl of ruined batter and, with a small breath, began working on it.

Behind her, Lilith flashed a half-smile and a wink at Nuala and Cerridwen, who were doing a very poor job of hiding their amusement.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Azriel entered the House of Wind. Rhysand had already given him an update; he had to go to the Town House, but wanted to change first.

He entered his room, removed all the weapons, his leathers, and landed on the bed with a soft thud. He was exhausted.

He took two deep breaths. He turned to his side and took another breath; his brows furrowed at the smell that reached him. He sat up and grabbed the sheets and smelled it again: fresh rainfall and peaches  

“Lily” He said in the empty room, his heart began to pound. She was here, his mate, on his bed,

He sighed, running a hand over his head, not knowing the story behind how this, but he knew she wasn’t hurt; Rhysand had confirmed that

In a quiet voice, he said, “House” – “Please do not change these sheets” a smile tugging on his lips

The house responded with a note appearing on his bed,

“Go for it, she is smitten”  - C

What happened here?  Azriel thought to himself, as he grinned, looking at the note his brother left.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

She was setting the table. Elain had made the pie. Lilith wasn’t sure if it would have worked, but it did, and she was thankful to Mother for this improvement

There was a brush on her mental shields “How are things?” Feyre's voice echoed in the mind

Lilith smiled, “Why don’t you see instead re-re?” Lilith showed her only the parts she wanted to,

“Sh- She baked?” Feyre's voice was trembling “She baked” This time it was more confident and happy “How?”

“I have my ways” Lilith hummed

“Lily”

“Okay, okay, I pretended not to know how to make it, and she helped” Lilith answered truthfully

“You have to tell me everything”

Before Lilith could reply, “I need to go now” and that was that

They were having dinner as a woosh sound came. Lilith’s eyes sparked as she saw Azriel walking inside, already feeling the cool tendrils along her legs.

“Hello” Elain was the one to speak first

“Hello” Azriel replied  

Lilith arched a brow, glancing between the two of them, but Azriel’s gaze was locked on her. And for a heartbeat, everything else faded.

He slid into the chair beside her “Hi”

“Hi” Lilith’s voice came out far breathier than she intended. With him sitting this close, her pulse kicked hard against her ribs.

“Sorry for the delay” Azriel said

“It is alright” Elain whispered with a soft smile,

A strange feeling twisted in Lilith’s chest; one she refused to name. The rest of dinner passed in near silence.

“You should try the pie” Lilith said “Elain made it”

Azriel's face was completely neutral “I will”

Not long after, Elain rose from the table. “I’m going to my room”

 “Do you want me to come?” Lilith offered immediately

Elain shook her head gently “No, it’s alright”

And she slipped away, leaving Lilith and Azriel alone in the quiet.

Lilith and Azriel sat together in the living room, the quiet settling around them like a soft blanket.

 “How was your mission?” Lilith asked

“Good” Azriel replied, “Updated Rhys on the way”

Azriel tilted his head, studying her “How did you get Elain to bake?”

Lilith leaned a little closer, a teasing glint in her eyes “You’re the Spymaster. Figure it out”

Those hazel-green eyes sparkled, he moved closer, “Are you changeling me?” Lilith only shrugged as she straightened

“We will be back tomorrow” Rhysand’s voice echoed in their minds “Take care” Lilith frowned; she wanted to see Feyre.

But before she could reply, she noticed Azriel’s hand: knuckles white, jaw tight. His silence told her Rhys was still speaking to him privately.

Without thinking, Lilith took his hand and intertwined with hers, remembering Mor’s words, Whatever tomorrow happens, I’ll live now

Azriel’s gaze slid to her, softening “What did he say?” Lilith asked

“Nothing much” – “Updates” Lie Rhysand had shown, what happened, how Lilith ended up in his bed.

 “Lily” The way he said her name, her heart did a flip-flop.

Her thumb brushed over the back of his hand. She knew there were no ‘updates’. Likely, Cassian had blabbed. But after today, after seeing Elain take a step forward, Lilith didn’t care.

“Do they hurt?” Her voice was almost a whisper

“Sometimes” – “Not physically, but when the memory comes back, the itching and burning sensation returns” Lilith nodded

“It-It was stepbrothers” Azriel confessed, “They thought mixing oil and fire with Illyrian healing would be a good experiment” Lilith held his grip tighter

“Do they still live?” She questioned

“No” He paused “I killed them”

“Good” There was no hesitation in her voice “Because I might have, if they did”

Something inside him cracked open at that—something old, painful, and long sealed away. And it made the next words easier

 “My father” he rasped “He locked me up in a cell, until I was eleven” – “I was only allowed out when my Mother came to visit”

His shadows stirred around him, as if remembering “That’s when they came to me” – “My shadows, I mean”

“Is your-”

“Dead” Azriel said flatly, and with zero remorse

“And your mother?” Lilith asked gently

“Safe” A small smile touched his lips. “She would love you”

A couple of heartbeats passed in quiet before Azriel leaned in, shadows curling low around him.

 “I have a confession” He mumbled

 Lilith's heart pounded so fast, she was scared he might be after to hear it “What is it?”

“I saw you” She furrowed her brows

Azriel ran a hand through his hair “In your house. Back in the human lands” – “I saw you play”

He hesitated, choosing his words carefully “Feyre was worried” – “Told us to keep an eye” Lilith arched an eyebrow

Azriel chuckled softly, “But to noticed me” - “You suddenly stopped playing” he paused “You even looked back as you were leaving”

He paused, his eyes turning like molten honey “I knew you didn’t see me, my shadows hid me completely, but still…”

Lilith tilted her head. She remembered that day; the strange prickle along her spine, the sense of being watched. She had stopped mid-note.

Azriel leaned forward, gently tugging the strand of hair behind her ear “Will you play for me?” The husky tone of this spread fire in her veins

Lilith's cheeks flushed as she nodded once. Yes. She would, for him.

A bright smile broke across her face as she rose and tugged him up with her “Come”

Azriel followed two steps behind, letting her lead. He didn’t let go of her hand. The contact was comforting and terrifying in all the best ways. She brought him to the back of the house, to the old study where the piano waited in the far corner.

Azriel's brows lifted. He rarely came to his side of the house “You played here before” It was a statement more than a question

Lilith nodded. The flush on her cheeks faded, replaced by something steadier. A quiet resolve. She wanted to share this with him. She didn’t want to hide anymore.

She sat at the bench and patted the seat beside her.

Azriel slid in next to her, a small grin on his face as his shadows spread outward, forming a soft barrier around the room “The sound is only for us tonight” he murmured

Lilith glanced at him, and he held her gaze “It’s already late, and” He began

She let out a soft chuckle, “You don’t have to explain yourself, every time Az” she shook her head, turning back to the piano as her hands found the keys

Lilith took a moment to think, to decide what story her hands would tell. Then she began.

The melody started soft and mournful at first, shaped by memories of lonely days and quiet ache. But gradually it shifted into something fuller, imperfect but warm, like the newfound life she had here.

Azriel’s shadows, usually still and alert, began to sway around them, moved by the music.

Lilith thought of all the moments she’d shared with him, only him. The stolen quiet, the rare times they were alone. A whisper, for she truly felt how she was drawn to him. This foreign, startling need to be close. She didn’t understand how someone could love so deeply, so fiercely; every thought changed the melody she played.

Azriel felt everything: her sadness, her loneliness, the fierce determination, her doubt and curiously. And threaded through all of them emotions, her love for him, raw and fragile and real. He closed his eyes; he didn’t resist the urge to send his own emotions down the bond, to make her feel the depth of what she stirred in him.

Lilith continued playing.

Then it came in waves, a sense of longing, the need. She didn’t stop, though; she knew these were his emotions. And that time, she recognised, she was sure of it.  

When she finished, she didn’t end with a final note. She left the melody incomplete, a pause instead of a stop, like the story still being written, shaped by the past and also the anticipation of the future.

Lilith exhaled unevenly and looked at Azriel; his eyes were still closed. Good. That made this a little easier

“My feelings” She began quietly  “My feelings for you are…different” A weight lifted from her chest “I’m drawn to you” She remembered the light she’d seen while playing, the warmth that spread through her.

“I think I know why” She whispered, shaking her head. She wouldn’t stop now, couldn’t “But it’s always been like that” She said in a barely audible whisper “Since I first saw you”

She didn’t say ‘I love you’ .She didn’t know what that love was supposed to feel like. But this feeling, whatever it is, it is real.

Azriel opened his silver-lined eyes, and her breath caught. He said nothing as he leaned in, brushing his lips over hers—a ghost of a kiss.

Lilith went still, eyes wide and searching. The unspoken plea in them pushed him forward.

Their mouths met again, slow and deliberate. There was no urgency, only a deep, unhurried pull toward each other. Lilith’s warm hands settled against his chest while his slid to the small of her back.

He rose, gathering her with him, and lifted her easily onto the piano.

Her gaze locked with his as he leaned in once more. The kiss that followed was different—deeper, charged, hungry. Her fingers threaded into his hair as if she’d done it a thousand times. She matched each of his movements with her own, meeting him with growing intensity.

When his hand slipped to the nape of her neck, drawing her closer, deepening the kiss, a soft moan escaped from her.

They parted, panting for air, Azriel cupped her face, his eyes pleading “Please” He whispered, voice rough “Please, tell me” He swallowed hard “Tell me you feel it” His voice cracked on the last word, his gaze locked on hers, raw and desperate.

Lilith knew exactly what he meant. But she couldn’t feel it, sense it, yes. Her voice was a whisper, “I – I see it” She closed her eyes, trying to reach the golden light, but there was an invisible wall.  Tears fell before she could stop them “I can’t reach it” She choked out. She couldn’t say what it meant, not when she couldn’t grasp it

Azriel’s heart clenched, not because of what she said, but because she was crying

He wiped her tears grently “It’s alright. Please don’t cry”

Lilith shook her head, “I’m a broken mess Az” she confessed to herself and him  

Azriel laced his fingers with hers “Don’t two broken things make a whole?” His forehead met hers.

They stayed like that for a long time, wrapped in each other’s arms, wrapped in a silence full of everything they couldn’t yet say, but felt. Far away, the clock chimed. The sound broke the spell, reminding them how late it was.

“We should rest” Lilith whispered “It’s late. And you were already tired from the mission”

Azriel’s eyes softened “Alright,” he murmured “As you wish” He took her hand, firm, steady, and led them away.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

“Tell me how you want it, angel” Azriel asked in a low husky, dominating voice, the sound vibrating through her core as he caged her body with his own

“Gentle,” He eased into her, filling her, inch by inch. A soft moan escaped her lips

“Hard” Azriel's grip tightened on her hips, slamming forward with brutal force. She felt him everywhere as her moans got louder

“Or” He trailed off, a predatory grin curling his lips as he pinned her wrists above her head. His free hand dug into her thigh, tugging it higher “Feral”

“Azriel!” She cried out, teetering on the edge “I’m-”

Lilith jolted awake with a strangled gasp, heat ripping through her. She felt too tight, too hot.

Lilith shoved the bedspread off her trembling legs, desperate for the cold air against her overheated skin. It did little. Images from the dream flashing behind her eyes, his eyes, his mouth, the way he looked at her

She exhaled sharply, trying to steady herself, but the air caught in her throat.

A snarl left through her lips as she glanced at the side table, the book lying there. She swung her legs over the side of the bed, toes hitting the cold marble floor.

Lilith pushed to her feet and headed for the bathing chamber. She twisted the tap as cold as it would go and stepped into the freezing water without hesitation.

Lilith walked into the living room, right after dawn. Voices drifted to her, familiar, warm, and despite the restless haze still clinging to her, a smile broke out.

“When did you guys get here?” She asked, pulling Feyre into a hug and then Mor.

“Just about fifteen minutes ago,” Cassian replied.

Her gaze slid past Cassian before she could stop it. Azriel stood in the corner, shadows curling lazily around him. The world seemed to vanish. Heart pounding against her ribs as memories of last night surged, his hands, his breath, the way he’d kissed her. And then that dream, vivid and consuming; Heat shot up her neck.

Someone cleared their throat. Lilith blinked hard, cheeks flushing as the room snapped back into reality.

“Did you get it?” She asked, a bit too quickly. Rhysand nodded

“We have things to discuss” He began “We need to-”

“It can wait” Mor cut in. “Amren isn’t here yet.” She hooked her arm through Lilith’s. “Come on.”

Azriel shifted immediately, taking a step forward as his shadows slid toward Lilith, twining around her legs, brushing her arms. Mor shot him a pointed look, half warning, half amusement.

Lilith bit her lip, torn between glancing at Azriel again and pretending she wasn’t desperately aware of him. She nodded instead.

“I’m stealing you” She declared, grabbing Feyre’s hand, shooting a daggered glare at Rhysand for good measure.

Somewhere between her late-night reading and the way best friends always managed to share too much, Lilith had made a decision, Feyre would know. But only on her terms.

They stepped into Mor’s room. Lilith turned to the shadows “Not this time” she murmured. “Go to him” They hesitated, then obeyed

The door closed with a soft thus “Before anything” Lilith said, looking at Feyre “You are not the High Lady, or Rhys’s mate.” She lifted a finger “Or an overprotective sister”

Feyre arched a brow, amused

“In this conversation, you’re my sister who used to be my best friend. The one I told everything to. Remember?”

Feyre’s smile softened. She nodded. “If that’s the case…” She glanced at Mor, then back at Lilith. “I already know. What happened. And the real reason we stayed in Hewn City.”

Mor’s jaw dropped. “He told you?”

Feyre smirked. “I have my ways” A mischievous glint lit her eyes.

“Wait” Lilith said, frowning “You guys stayed behind in Hewn so Az and I could-”

“Yes” they both said in unison, and without shame. Lilith groaned and pressed a hand to her forehead, shaking it slightly.

“Tell. Us. EVERYTHING” Mor demanded

Lilith bit her lip, heat creeping up her throat again as they all settled in. And then, slowly, hesitantly, she began.

Azriel sank into his usual armchair. He never initiated small talk, not with his brothers, unless there was a necessary reason. This wasn’t one of those moments.

“I wonder what happened” Cassian mused, smirking as he sprawled across the sofa “That Lil just stole Mor and Feyre like that”

Azriel didn’t give anything away; his face might have, as Cassian barked out a laugh

“Look at him, Rhysie” – “His ears are going red”

Azriel flicked him a warning glance, but the High Lord wasn’t paying attention to Cassian’s teasing. Rhysand’s face had gone thoughtful, calculating

“It hasn’t snapped for her yet” he said quietly, not a question, but an observation.

Azriel’s jaw tensed “No”

He hesitated, fingers flexing once against the armrest. “She said she can sense it. But something’s blocking it” He exhaled, frustrated, wings rustling “I don’t know what that means” Cassian’s smirk faded a little at the rawness in Azriel’s voice.

“But honestly” He continued, voice low “I’m relieved it hasn’t snapped yet” – “ Not with Hybern, and the queens”

The energy in the room shifted instantly, and playfulness dissolved into grim reality. Plans. War. Threats closing in.

Cassian straightened, clearing his throat “We need to visit the camps” A pause “Letters sent?” Both his brothers nodded

Rhysand pushed to his feet “I should call them back. We need to discuss matters that can’t wait” His voice dropped into command “Cass, get Nesta out of her room”

Cassian groaned loudly “Why is that always my job?”

Rhys didn’t glance back “Because you’re the only one she won’t throw a shoe at” Cassian muttered something colourful under his breath as he left

Feyre opened the door “Ah perfect timing, come in” She let Rhysand inside

“Lily he would know the answer” Feyre declared

Lilith studied Rhysand, his stiff posture, the urgency in his violet eyes. He looked like a male trying to be a good mate, a good brother, while desperately hiding the fact that he had absolutely no idea what Feyre was referring to.

“Later” – “Let's go” Lilith declared. Rhysand’s shoulders loosened as he looked at Lilith with sad yet thankful eyes

Nesta walked in the middle of the conversation, and nobody had stopped discussing what they were. What Elain had told her when she went to check up with her this morning, how her youngest sister got her doing something, Nesta didn’t know. But now it felt like she owed something to Lilith

“I’m coming” Her voice was steel “To the mountains and the meeting” She looked at Lilith and then at Amren, who gave aproving nod

“Just tell me when” Nesta looked directly at Rhysand

“You’ll be notified as soon as the time is set” Rhysand said, with his High Lord voice

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

As they stepped into the House of Wind, Lilith spun on her heel and punched Cassian square in the stomach. He doubled over with a rough grunt.

“I know you’re the one who blabbed” Lilith said, casually blowing on her knuckles. Mor burst into laughter

Azriel’s lips curved upward at the edges, subtle, but there. Lilith still hadn’t met his eyes since the meeting. And now he was curious.

Cassian's face was still modelled in pain “Okay, okay” He raised his hands up in defeat “I deserved that”

His gaze flicked between Lilith and Azriel, noting the distance between them, the way Lilith kept her eyes anywhere but on the shadowsinger. Cassian draped an arm over her shoulder.

Azriel let out a low, barely audible growl, and Cassian answered with a smirk “Why don’t we train a bit?” – “You have not sparred with me yet” he paused “Have you, Lily?” He stated, looking directly at Azriel.

Azriel’s jaw clenched so hard he wondered how his teeth didn’t break.

Lilith’s brows furrowed “No” – “But alright” she shrugged her shoulders,

Before she could take a step, Azriel grabbed Cassian and headed out to the training field

Lilith blinked “What just happened?”

Mor laughed, “It’s just the whole primal-protection of a mate” Lilith snapped her head towards Mor

“So it’s actually true then?” Lilith said in a whisper, “I never said the word out load” Lilith shook her head

Mor waved a hand “This is nothing, wait until it snaps for you” She grinned “It’s going to get much, much worse”

She leaned back against the wall “So, how was your experience with ‘normal’?”

Lilith opened her mouth, only a shy away, as a traitorous smile broke on her face.

“Ooooh, look at you” Mor crowed “Lilith Archeron, who barely spoke when she came here and never smiled, now turning red as a tomato” Lilith elbowed her

“We should train as well” Lilith said “I need to practice my archery”

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith was getting ready for bed, brushing her hair, when she heard a knock.

She opened the door, and froze.

“Hi" Azriel stood on the other side. Shirtless. Illyrian tattoos on full display. She tried not to stare. Tried, and failed.

A smirk tugged at his mouth.

Lilith straightened, desperately trying to compose herself. “Hi” She opened the door wider, unsure why he had come. “May I come in?” She nodded.

Azriel’s eyes dipped to the nightgown she wore, soft, pale, far too revealing under the light. He bit his lower lip. Lilith suddenly felt too hot, and looked anywhere but at him.

Azriel loved that she was like this with him, unguarded, flustered, real; he cleared his throat. “I thought we could talk”

Lilith’s heart sank a little, but she understood. She had questions of her own.

They stepped onto the balcony “Before anything” Azriel began, taking a breath as he stared at the sky, “I wanted to tell you” – “My feelings aren’t because of the bond” Lilith’s breath hitched. “Even when you were human” He shook his head “I wanted to stay by your side” His gaze finally met hers.

Lilith closed her eyes for a moment. If he could bare himself like this, so could she “It’s the same with me” She whispered “The time you first saw me on the tree” – “I couldn’t get you out of my mind” She hesitated before adding “Your eyes kept popping up”  She swallowed “And then the voice. It was you, wasn’t it?”

Azriel nodded “It was me” he said, voice rough.

“Come back. Come back to me. I’ll wait,” Lilith whispered, repeating the words.

Azriel stiffened, the memory hitting him hard. The air between them thickened, charged, wanting

Lilith cleared her throat “You sure did a number on Cass” She said, remembering how Azriel had pummelled him.

Azriel chuckled “He had it coming”

He stepped forward and wrapped an arm around her, pulling her against him “But I don’t want to talk about Cass right now” His voice dropped to a low whisper as his drooped to the sides, cocooning them

Lilith’s heart pounded. Heat curled through her body at the memory of her dream. She hesitated, then lifted a hand to his wing—pausing when she remembered his reaction last time.

Azriel dipped his head in a small nod, a permission; Lilith touched the inner membrane of his left wing

Azriel’s eyes rolled back as a shudder ran through him

“What does it feel like?” She asked gently

Azriel lowered his mouth to her ear and let out a breath “Like that”

A rush of goosebumps spread over her skin “Az” she breathed

He kissed her then slowly, gently, deeply; he wanted to feel every second of it. The feeling of her warmth, his breath mingling with hers. Each small movement drew them closer, and the rest of the world vanished.

He removed the glamour from his scent as they parted. Completely bare, only for her

Lilith’s mind turned into a puddle as the scent reached her. She twisted in his embrace, pressing herself into him. She kissed him then

The moment their lips collided again, it wasn’t careful anymore—it was raw, urgent, hungry. Azriel bit her lower lip, and she moaned as he slid his tongue against hers. A sharp wave of desire hit her when she felt his hardness pressed to her stomach.

His lips trailed down her jaw, to her neck. He sucked gently where her neck met her shoulder. Marking. Claiming. A low, satisfied growl rumbled through him as he pulled back to admire the marks blooming there.

“Az” He answered in a vibrating hum, marvelling at his work

“I didn’t come here expecting anything” He mumbled “I just needed you to know the truth. All of it”

Lilith’s hand slowly slid up his back, fingers brushing the base of his wing. Azriel shuddered, actually shuddered—and his grip tightened on her hip, as if he fought the urge to pull her impossibly closer.

“Will you stay?” She whispered

He let a out a low growl “If I stay” Azriel said hoarsely “I don’t trust myself not to-”

And then—The lights in her room flickered. Then dimmed. Then blushed into the faintest rose-gold glow.

Azriel froze “Did the House just-” Lilith covered her face with a mortified groan

The House made a soft chiming sound. Teasing. Approving.

Azriel shook with silent laughter, forehead falling to her shoulder “It likes you” Lilith muttered.

“It’s going to be unbearable tomorrow” He murmured.

“Only tomorrow?” She shot back, arching a brow

He brushed a thumb along her jaw, gaze softening “Every day”

For a long moment, they simply stood there, holding onto one another while the House hummed in the background. Finally, Azriel exhaled “I should let you sleep” He said, though his fingers traced slow circles over Lilith’s hip, reluctant to leave.

She smiled, heart full and unsteady “Goodnight, Az”

His eyes flicked to her lips, then back to her eyes “Goodnight, Angel”

They walked towards the door, he lingered a heartbeat longer, as he shut the door behind him.

Lilith leaned against the doorway, breathless. Sleep would not come easily tonight. Not after him.

𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪

Note: Sorry it took me so long, I hope yyou guys enjoyed this. I loved writing the house teasing Az and Lily, and the part where she gets drunk.

And i know the dream is a lil steamy, as a smut lover, i wanted to add more towards the end. But it just felt wrong.

My Taglist <3: @the-onlyy-angie @lreadsstuff @xadenswhore @willowpains @secretsicanthideanymore @a-chegwidden @tele86 @i-am-infinite @booksbypisces @anon1227 @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @sophieliz @nebarious @whore-of-many-hot-men @art1012 @plants-w0rld @bruuuuuuuuuuuuh @mitziix @annamariereads16 @illustrioussanctuarystatue @goldenlove1665 @madeofeverythingjuice @regulusblackstar @wickedpyro @littleemissperfecttt @nikfigueiredo @celestialgilb @thelady-of-dragonfire @ogscoobydoobysnacks @namelesssav @smashee0789 @littowl @watermelomsuger @trippiehippieashley @aurora-maria

[abedmajed69]

💔🇵🇸 My Daughter Was Born Under Bombs — I'm Just Trying to Keep Her Alive

My name is Abdulmajid.

I got married one month before the war. Those were beautiful days — full of hope, love, and simple dreams. I dreamed of a small home, a quiet family, and a baby girl I could hold without fear.

But the war came… Suddenly. Brutally.

My mother was killed. My brother was killed. Children in my family were taken by the bombs. My home was destroyed. And my work stopped completely.

Then… in the middle of this nightmare, my baby girl was born. A tiny soul, innocent, unaware of the war. She cries from hunger, from cold, from the sounds of bombs shaking what’s left of our walls.

Today, I’m a father with almost nothing… Fighting every day to find flour, milk, or even a small meal to feed my child.

Prices are sky-high — a single 25kg bag of flour can cost $800. There is no work. No income. No safety. No stability.

I write this from under siege, hoping my heart will reach yours.

Abedmajed’s Hope: Rebuilding Our Family’s Life in Gaza

My name is Abedmajed Elderawi, and I live in Gaza with what remains of my once large and loving family.

Even $1 can make a difference. It can feed a child, buy milk, or bring a moment of peace. Be the heart that reaches Gaza. Be the hand that saves.

📌 Please share this post. Let our voices be heard — not buried under rubble.

Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #537 )✅️

[violetscar656]

Court of Calm Chaos - Chapter 5

Warning: Few spoilers to ACOWAR

Authors' Note: Hi guys, the 5th part is finally here. Gosh, I think I changed the ending to this like six times. And tbh I'm not sure about this as well. It's going to be confusing if you haven't read ACOWAR.

I hope you all enjoy. Comments are open.

Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Lilith’s mind was in a complete MESS. After the stunt Amren had pulled out, after everything, her mind didn’t process.

Lilith sat in an office at the House of Wind, although everyone wanted to discuss it in the living room, Lilith was not having it; she had basically kicked everyone out and even asked the shadows to leave. Rhysand told Feyre had to remain, if not as Lilith’s sister then as the High Lady. Feyre had given her mate and Amren an earful about the stunt they pulled.

“I was thinking about the time you came to my apartment” Lilith's mind went to that one time she practised with Amren “I came to Rhysand when” She paused, thinking of words “When I had a doubt”

“The way to confirm was if the Book of Breathings called to you,” Amren said as Lilith stiffened

Feyre spoke up, “That cursed book spoke to me as well” - “And to Rhys” - “And anyone, really” Her fury was noticeable in her tone.

Amren gave a knowing look. “Exactly, My Lady”, she said, “But the book called to her.” Amren looked towards Lilith, and Lilith looked right back.

There was a silence in the room. Lilith’s mind went to a thousand places, but landed on the first time in the cauldron, the female voice she heard.

“Not all face death smiling” “Let me grant you this, because it’s not your time”

Rhysand cleared his throat “The time you were in the cauldron”, he paused, hesitating “Can you tell anything about it?” he asked, not demanded.

Maybe it was the way the High Lord asked, Lilith knew Rhysand could simply look in her mind without her knowing, but he had asked. Lilith looked at Feyre, her mother’s eyes meeting her’s, she took in a deep breath. “Amren might be right” Lilith’s voice was more stable than she thought “I did hear a female’s voice”

Rhysand cleared his throat, “There are legends, not written but whispered” - “Thousands of years ago” - “There were warriors, rumoured to be a direct distant of Gods” Lilith’s brows furrowed, she read that the Gods left this place, travelled to different realms, but “Some lingered for a while, until there was only one” Rhysand said

Amren cleared her throat “They were powerful” - “Too powerful” Feyre shifted “Legends say their powers were anything they wished for” Lilith's eyes went wide.

Amren shook her head “The oldest fae know how to distinguish in powers” - “You” she paused, looking at Lilith “Are blessed, yes, but what the caldron transformed it into” - “Well, that’s yet to be known” Feyre let out a long sigh.

There was a pause; Lilith’s mind raced through different possibilities. Amren had told her before that she needed a proper setup; resolve settled upon her. Lilith narrowed her eyes at Amren, knowing the point she was trying to make.

She looked at Rhysand and back to Amren, “Are there any wards of protection against magic from within?” Lilith knew about the wards that the houses were warded with protection, but that was if intruders attacked from outside.

Feyre held Lilith's hand “You don’t have to” Lilith shook her head “Did you run away? When you knew you could help re-re?” Lilith asked calmly, looking at her sister, “Did you not practice your powers?” Feyre was at a loss for words

“Are you sure you want to practice? You can continue your research first,” Rhysand spoke up.

Amren tised “She needs practice, boy” She bore her eyes to the High Lord “Just like you did” Rhysand stiffened in his seat.

Lilith got up, “Tell me when and where” - “I’ll be ready” And then took her leave.

Lilith entered her room and was barely able to close the door as her legs gave out. She sat on the floor. It was too much; tears began flowing. One day, she wanted a day to process everything that had happened before, but now that seemed impossible; her breathing became short and rapid. Her mind was repeating everything, every nightmare, flashes of every negative thing. And by the Gods, were there many things.

Her promise to her mother. Her family’s poverty. Her mother’s treatment towards her. Her sisters. Feyre is being taken away. The pain from the treatments. Knowing she would die. The cauldron. Her nightmares about the cauldron.

The survival mode she lived in as a human. And somehow, realising that even now she was surviving, at least to some level. She silently cried through everything, every time she pretended to be calm and strong, because that’s what people expected from Lilith.

As if the house knew, the doors to her balcony opened, and Lilith gathered herself, walking towards the balcony, cool wind hitting her face. She stood near the railing, taking in the view of the starry sky and the crescent moon.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

He didn’t know if she wanted company, but she hadn’t eaten anything. He knocked on the door, and he heard a distant sound come in.

Cassian opened the door to see Lilith standing on the balcony. He placed the food on the table “Thought you would like someone to be here” - “I know you would rather prefer Mor or Feyre”

Lilith huffed and shook her head, “No, Cass, it’s nothing like that” She finally faced the general “Thank you” She said with a small smile.

Cassian looked at her puffy face and swollen eyes and knew she had been crying “Do you want to talk about it?” He sat on the chair

Lilith sat beside him, grabbing the plate “The situation is similar to what you told me at breakfast that day” Lilith played with the potatoes.

Cassian looked at her “Lil, you know anybody here will be ready to hear you out” Lilith thought about the shadowsinger, his offer that night, as she nodded. They sat there is silence for a while, Lilith eating slowly.

Cassian let out a sigh, “I can’t be in that much silence” - “That’s more for Azriel” he swore. He saw Lilith’s cheeks flushed even at the mention of his name.

Cassian noticed a shadow that circled Lilith’s wrist, and smirked, “You know,” he drawled “The shadows had never disobeyed him” he said teasingly.

Lilith looked at him “Well, they do now” Lilith said, brows furrowing. She added, “Why do you think it’s like that?” Cassian didn’t expect that question

“Umm, well, I’m not sure either” He stumbled on his words. Lilith narrowed her eyes “Liar” she declared dryly.

Cassian dramatically placed a hand on his chest, “Ow” - “Lil, that hurt” Lily chuckled, Cassian looked a her in surprise. This was the first time she had laughed, well, at least in front of him.

He patted himself on the back, “Well, well, I’m proud of myself” - “You laughed” Lilith smiled at him, shaking her head. Maybe Lilith needed this distraction “You are a great brother” Lilith said without thinking, her eyes went wide as she snapped her head down.

Cassian's eyes softened as he smiled at Lilith, “Always Lil”, he stood up, ruffled her hair “And that’s what brothers do” he said while walking towards the door “Finish your plate, and then sleep” and then added, “Goodnight Lil”

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Standing in the training ground, half of it bordered with ruins to protect from any mishap, Lilith glared at Amren. There was a shift, a tilt within her, when Amren said the power was wasted on Lilith; glowing light formed in her peripherals, and Lilith felt a tingling sensation in her hands. She wasn’t blinded with rage or overwhelmed by emotions; no, Lilith just was. She looked at her hands, silver strings, lined with blue. Lilith’s instincts took over as she raised her hands, the currents dancing along her fingers, and then aimed for Amren.

They were panting; the magic had lessened, she could feel it “What happened?” Lilith asked, after that first aim, Amren had gone down, as if the ground underneath pulled her. She had gotten up and attacked, but Lilith had either dodged her moves or something pulled away at Amren’s aim. Amren walked over to Lilith, removing her jacket and the dagger and placing them on the ground.

Lilith's eyes widen, looking at the female, grinning. Amren shook her head “Don’t be surprised, you did well” Her eyes went down and back to Lilith as she gave a knowing look. Lilith's gaze finally went down. A gasp came out of her as her hands flew to her mouth. There, lying on the ground, were two bent daggers, and the jacket that was crafted with silver, at the waist and shoulders, now all bent in the wrong way.

There was a pause, “I-I” Lilith began, not able to digest the situation “Can bend metal?” Lilith couldn’t believe what she was saying or even seeing. Amren chuckled, “No, youngest one” - “You can will it” she said, as she gave a sly smile.

“I don’t understand” Lilith said, “If my powers, as per you, is to control metal?” - “How was I able to do what I did when I had the outbursts?” Lilith remembered the soldiers flying away in Hybern, the lights flickering, the objects rattling.

Rhysand looked at Amren. Amren had demanded that he come to the House of Wind; “This power was different” Amren said, “It was more subtle” Lilith raised an eyebrow. “Can you show me?” Rhysand asked. Lilith looked towards the ruins, still protecting everything else. Lilith nodded

Rhysand’s gaze went to the bent sword. After a long pause, “It was different” Rhysand spoke “Your power, what I felt now, was very muted” - “Nothing like before” Lilith’s head snapped to her Brother-in-law.

He cleared his throat, “When Feyre began practising her magic” - “She was able to concentrate on the little things” - “Making a twig burn, creating small water creatures, that sort of thing” he paused “Deep down, your magic feels comfortable with metals” - “So” he gave a pointed look on the ground.

Lilith took a deep breath, adding this information to the pile of what she had to accept.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

The next couple of days passed in a blur, as Lilith trained with Mor and Amren, testing Lilith’s powers on steel, gold and whatnot, but there was no sign of that power she felt within her. Nevertheless, today, Mor was well in a ‘mood’

Lilith panted for air “What's wrong?” She stumbled for balance on the ground, lowering her dagger. They were training in close combat fighting with weapons.

Mor scowled, “It’s nothing really” Lilith raised a brow; she knew Mor well enough by now and vice versa; the friendship between them grew day by day. Mor was the only one who was able to understand that Lilith was on the edge of shutting down, despite to calm act.

Mor let out a sigh “It’s about this meeting, and” she paused “I was meant to ask you something, a long time ago” Lilith’s brows furrowed in confusion “Rhysand asked me to ask you if you want to get involved in the politics” - “But you already went through so much that” Mor spoke.

“Yes” Lilith’s answer was firm “I appreciate your concern, Mor, I really do” Indeed, Lilith understood why Mor kept it hidden from her.

“I know too much is going on, but I’d like to be involved” Lilith sheathed her dagger, looking towards the sky. They were alone, nobody else to hear, she could tell this “This place feels like home than any other” Lilith said in a whisper.

She looked at Mor studying her. Lilith knew other things were going through her mind. She placed a hand on her shoulder “The other things you can tell me when you're ready” Lilith gave a small smile “But I have to show you something” Mor’s brows furrowed.

Lilith took her dagger and summoned her magic. Her hands glowed as the dagger flew up, and it hit the target board several feet from them, without bending. Lilith grinned at Mor “There is more, but I don’t want to destroy any weapons”

Mor gaped at Lilith, half surprised that she was grinning, half surprised by the pace of her control. Mor held Lilith by the shoulders “You are controlling it” Mor smiled “When, how?”

Lilith bit her tongue “Sometimes at night when I can’t sleep, I come to practice here” When Rhysand tried to explain to Lilith about her magic, she had not gone to her sister, but instead came to Mor. She told her what it could mean, how, in the beginning, magic guides the user. Lilith had shown her by bending a shovel in the garden. Mor, it seemed, wasn’t impressed; she had given Lilith a lecture on aim and control.

“Your power can be used in the war” Mor said. Lilith's smile faded. She had thought about it, but how would she distinguish between the enemy and friend? And right now, she was able to control it in small spaces, but on a battlefield, she was not sure. Lilith still nodded, unsure of what was to come.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith entered the apartment with Cassian to see the Mor and Azriel already present. She gave a wave to Mor and Amren. Cassian had come for her in the morning, and he had updated Lilith on the situation of Lucien and Elain. Lilith had given him a vacant look. It’s not that she didn’t care about her sisters; she did, but she was tired of being the one always making the first move with Nesta and Elain. Lilith made up her mind, their apology first, then everything else.

She sat next to Mor, trying to avoid the gaze of a particular male sitting beside her on the opposite side. Mor got up “Where do you keep your fancy wine, Amren?” She walked away, Lilith bore eyes in Mor’s back. She turned her head and smirked.

Lilith stared at her hands. The shadows were already dancing around her. It had been a while since she had met the shadowsinger; he hadn’t been around lately.

There was a shift “Hey” Azriel's voice came. Lilith looked up to see him beside her. Something was different; there was a flowery smell mixed with his, which Lilith was oddly familiar with. Lilith took a deep breath; it smelled like sweet jasmine. Smelled like Elain. Lilith’s heart sank.

She forced a smile “Hi” She replied, her eyes losing the excitement every time she saw, heck, even heard his name.

She remembered how he was sitting next to her sister at dinner, the one time she attended. Lilith’s mind raced. Maybe they were together, maybe she had read things wrong, maybe- “Here you go”, came Mor’s voice as she handed out a glass to Lilith, she took it.

Cassian raised his brows, “Day drinking now, are we?” before Mor could say anything “It’s 5 pm somewhere”, Lilith said dryly, needing this.

The door opened as Rhysand and Feyre walked in.

Lilith didn’t say much as the group were discussing things, Mor telling Rhysand to kill the Autumn Court’s High Lord, Beron and the whole family, allowing Lucien to take the throne. Indeed, Lilith was aware of what happened to Mor, how Eris didn’t show any mercy. And what her own father did. Lilith’s blood boiled just thinking about it.

“I’m going to peel the King’s skin from his body the next time I see him” Cassian said with determination. “Not if I beat you to it” Lilith said, from beside Cassian. Her power hummed thinking of that rotten male. Everyone had told bits and pieces to her about Hybern’s ‘agenda’, how they are, what they are like. Lilith took a sip of wine.

Rhysand smirked, “I do believe you two” - “Truly” Lilith narrowed her eyes “But we have a war to plan first” - “Revenge, unfortunately, has to be secondary”

Rhysand looked at Amren, “Anything from the book?” as if it knew, “Hello, princesses, the two-faced liar, the one to yield” “Oh, be quite” – “Shut the fuck up” Amren and Lilith said in unison. Lilith and Amren looked at each other. Amren smirked at Lilith. Lilith blamed the wine that loosened her tongue

Mor laughed, “I think this is the first time I heard her curse besides training” Lilith looked at Feyre, who gaped at her. Lilith smiled at her and shook her head.

“I can do that” Lilith said when the topic of mending the wall came up. She knew Nesta and Elain wouldn’t help “No” Came Azriel’s voice from behind her.

Lilith turned her head to the male “I wasn’t asking,” She said in a deathly calm voice. Lilith was angry with Aziel; he was the first to say no to anything she wanted to help with.

Rhysand cleared his throat, “Lilith, your powers are needed else where” - “And besides, the invitation to the High Lords will be out by tomorrow, you’ll be much needed there” Lilith broke the contact from the spymaster and looked at Rhysand, the disappointment clear on her face, but she nodded anyway.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Rhysand flew Lilith to the House of Wind. He was still feeling off about what happened at Amren’s apartment with him and Feyre; he was hurt by it, yes, he glanced at Lilith, who had a similar expression, thanks to Azriel. They landed on the balcony, and Lilith took off immediately, saying a small thank you. He wanted to ask Lilith to join them for dinner, but Lilith was clear about her boundary when it came to Nesta and Elain.

“Lily”, Rhysand called out, conjuring a box from thin air “Here” Lilith’s brows furrowed “It’s not from me” It was given to him when Lilith asked Rhysand to fly her to the house. “I should get going” With that, he took off.

A few shadows had followed her home like usual. She felt oddly comforted that at least they were here to give her company. Yes, Rhysand and Feyre were living in the Town House, but Lilith thought, shaking her head, she cleared her thoughts and headed to her room.

She had bathed, changed, and just wanted to sleep. When her room door opened, she went and closed it. Lying down on the bed, the house opened the door again, and she got up, stepping outside her door. A shadow pulled her to the dining table, where a plate of food sat. Lilith looked at the empty room, empty house really “I don’t feel like eating” She said to the shadows and the House.

She looked at the box Rhysand had given her. Lilith opened the box to find tea in it and a note: “When sleep doesn’t come easily, this tea will help” - “Yours, Azriel” Lilith’s heart skipped a beat at the way he signed the card. She didn’t know why, but tears began rolling down her face, “Your master is a dumb Illyrian” she said to the shadow near her wrist. Lilith sat at the table, looking at the gift.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Azriel didn’t feel like eating; his mind was divided between how to prepare for this war and how Lilith currently is. He thought Mor would have at least stayed with her; conversations were following around him.

“Hey, don’t blend into the shadows” He heard Cassian. Azriel couldn’t care less.

A knock came through his shields “Yes, Rhys?”

“I know you would rather be at the House of Wind” Rhysand said “Everybody came here - “She is in that house alone” Aziel replied

A pause, Azriel knew with the widening of Feyre’s eyes, that his brother had told her the information, and Azriel cursed under his breath.

“Just, please stay here until this is over, ” Rhysand said. Azriel growled mentally.

The discussion continued about visiting the Hewn City, Nesta, to Azriel’s surprise, agreed to come to Hewn City and to train with Amren.

Azriel cleared his throat, “I can teach you to fly” - “It’s not going to be easy” he looked outside the balcony door “It’s better to train in the House of Wind grounds, it’s much bigger” Feyre nodded. Azriel looked at Cassian and swore he heard him say “Sly bastard” under his breath.

Azriel put Lilith into her bed. He gently tugged the strands of hair back, “I’m so sorry, angel,” he whispered. He had flown as fast as possible. He had found her sitting at the dining table, asleep, the plate of food untouched. Azriel’s heart ached seeing Lilith like that. With a final look at his mate, he silently left the room.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Nesta stood in the doorway, thinking about Amren's words. She had agreed to train, but only with her powers; she made it very clear to Cassian that she wouldn’t be training with him. She saw that her sisters’ training. Feyre was always the wild one. But seeing Lilith, the sister who was the other side of the same coin as her.

Nesta knew she had crossed a line that day, and what followed it terrified her, not Lilith’s power but the anger within her—the anger she had caused.

“Look who is here” - “Care to join?” Cassian said smugly, and Nesta ignored him, walking towards where Lilith and Mor were sparring. They didn’t stop as she came; Lilith continued with her moves. Mor might have taken pity on Nesta, as she ended the training in the next two moves.

“I wish to speak with you,” Nesta directed the question to Lilith. Her sister glared at her as she walked back into the house.

Lilith didn’t say anything, and Nesta also didn’t; they just looked at each other for a while. Nesta took a deep breath, “I know I was out of line that night”, - “I shouldn’t have said what I did”

For that day, not for the treatment she went through from Nesta in the past. Lilith knew the words ‘sorry’ or ‘I was wrong’ didn’t belong in Nesta’s dictionary, but for her, this was a close enough step.

Lilith's gaze softened just a bit “I heard you're practising your magic” Nesta gave a cret nod “I told Rhys that Amren would be perfect for you”

“Doesn’t she train you as well?” Nesta questioned, Lilith shook her head, “In the beginning, yes” - “But Mor took over now” There was silence again. Lilith wanted to ask about Elain, but thought better, “I should get going” With that, Lilith went back to the training field.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith was sitting in Mor’s bedroom at House of Wind. She had updated them for the trip to Hewn City. Feyre had given Lilith the option to join or not; she had said yes. To Lilith’s surprise, Nesta had agreed to come.

Mor was taking out dress after dress, “Isn’t there something else?” Lilith asked Mor, holding a dress that barely covered anything. “There are roles everyone needs to play” Mor said with a shrug. Feyre had explained how the act would be. It was simple, really, to just toy with the people, assure dominance, and to show the dangerous side.

“And what makes mee?” Lilith drawled, picking at a dress that just covered the private areas, lifting her brows. Mor half-chuckled, half snorted, “That’s pretty. Want to try it?” Mor teased, and Lilith slapped her arm.

“You can raid my closet for anything” - “I just liked these” Lilith raised a brow; she knew Mor’s dressing style. There will be a time, Lilith knew, in a far, far future when Lilith would try them, but not now.

Lilith walked towards the dresses lined with endless gowns. “Can’t I just wear my leathers?” - “Gowns are just-”

“Absolutely not!” Mor shouted

To Lilith, dresses were feminine, something she never got used to wearing; tunics and pants were comfortable for hunting, back in the day. She liked wearing the Illyrian leathers. Her thoughts were going on as she went through the dresses; her hand halted on a floor-length dress, a shimmiering blue so deep it was nearly black. The neck was high up, there were slits at the thighs, but enough fabric to cover if she stood. The lace fabric at the waist made the dress just scandalous enough.

“How about this?” Lilith said, taking it out. Mor studied the dress, “A little too conservative for this” Lilith turned the dress to reveal the non-existent back, “Oh, perfect” Mor grinned “Go try it on”

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith cornered Lucien as he exited the room. Elain had come out, and Lilith was happy to see her sister. The food she taught Nuala and Cerridwen to prepare was helping a bit. Elain didn’t look too thin. But her eyes, Lilith had never seen such hopelessness in them before

“Lucien, am I correct?” Lilith let him see the power underneath, just like Nesta’s, but completely different

Lucien nodded, “Yes” - “You must be Lily” - “Lilith” she corrected

Lilith glanced at Elain and then back at Lucien “I have something to tell you” - “I don’t know if others have pointed it out” Lucien's eyes widened

“My sister had lost everything, her life, a wedding to a person she loved” - “She was robbed out of her life”

Lucien put his head down “I’m aware of that” - “But she is my ma-”

“The first words, ' Lilith cut him off “The words she heard after getting out of the cauldron - “Were about you claiming her” Lilith felt the power hum within her “Think about that” With that, she felt

Lilith got dressed for the role, but she didn’t know why she was frustrated. Mate. She had read about a mating bond, something that was so powerful, pure and blessed by the Mother. Lilith didn’t know why the words kept repeating Come back to me, I’ll wait. She thought about how familiar Aziel’s voice was, and the image of those hazel-green eyes popped up.

Lilith sighed, looking at the shadows dancing along her body. She stood in front of the mirror. Lilith blinked, not recognising the person in front; she looked beautiful, the dress highlighting every curve. A knock came from the door, as Mor walked in “Look at you” she whistled. Lilith's face went red. Mor chuckled, “Let's get your makeup done”

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

She felt a foreign power in her mind. Rhysand had told her this would happen. They were Daematis in the Court of Nightmares. She stood up as she slammed down another shield, trapping the power. Somewhere in the crowd, a man screamed. Lilith looked at Feyre sitting on the thrown, a proud expression on her face. Lilith gave a sly smile.

To say Lilith was in rage to see Eris at the Court of Nightmares was an understatement. She wanted to go with Mor wanted to be part of the conversation. But Rhysand had told her to save the tricks she planned to scare off Keir. And she did, the male was stupid enough to come close when she stood alone. Lilith had just side-smiled, with a hint of teeth, and let her power simmer to the top, an expression she usually saw on Amren. Keir had seen that and practically ran away with tail between his legs.

“You look like you want to kill”, Cassian teased. Lilith shrugged; her eyes kept shifting to the throne room. After Keir’s foolishness, Cassian had come to stand with her.

Lilith calmly said, “Cause I want to” Indeed, this court was filled with two-faced liars. If she concentrated, Lilith was able to hear the whispers of them calling her and Nesta a witch or a monster. “Lil” - “We, I get it, truly,” - “But we need Keir’s forces to fight” Cassian explained “And if that means smiling and accepting his demands, we’ll have to” Lilith waved a hand, dismissing this topic.

Her eyes went to the throne room again. Cassian smiled, “They’ll be back soon” Lilith sighed, “Hope you are right”.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

It was chaos in the Town House. The trick Rhysand pulled was, Lilith didn’t have words. She understood why he did such a thing, but she also understood Mor. The complicated relation she had with Keir and Eris. And to put Velaris, a place that was a sanctuary for Mor, Lilith shook her head. She looked at Mor. This was the second time she saw her cry, the first being when she opened up to Lilith. Lilith clasped Mor’s hand in support of understanding.

Lilith glared at Feyre as she spoke about the mirror, the Ouroboros. Her sister hadn’t told her anything about that, or about the prison. Rhysand had told her once during their study lessons about what the prison was, what lurked there. To think Amren was trapped there, and gave up almost everything to free herself, and yet be this powerful; goosebumps prickled over Lilith’s skin as she thought about the prison.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Azriel flew Lilith to the House of Wind. He was glad to do so before he went to find out what the cauldron took from the Queens. He looked at Lilith, her gaze at the city beyond. Azriel had to fight every instinct, had to leash every shadow, to leave her alone in Hewn City. They had a part to play, and if people there knew, he didn’t want to complete that thought.

He knows his position in the court has gained him many enemies. But he also knew that his mate was strong; he looked at Lilith, his eyes widened to see the utter happiness on her face. Lilith’s smile was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. She had always loved flying, he remembered that.

They landed on the balcony “Thank you” Lilith said with a smile. Azriel walked Lilith inside,

Even if there was a war looming in the corner, even if tomorrow wasn’t written, these movements, just two of them, were rare to come. Lilith looked at him “The tea helps” her voice was soft.

“Glad to hear” Azriel said, his eyes softening. Every part of him told to stay, he managed a step; Lilith's eyes went to the ground, mustering up the courage to tell “Thank you” She took an audible breath “For putting me to bed that night” Her voice was a whisper; she was awake, the movement he lifted her, but pretended to be asleep. The words he said removed every doubt in her mind. But the situation well, it was not the time.

Azriel's eyes widen. He managed another step, he raised his hand, paused mid-way, but Lilith didn’t move, as he tugged the strand of her hair back “Please eat” - “You barely did in Hewn” Lilith nodded.

Lilith swallowed, looking at him “Be careful” - “On the mission” Azriel gave her a small smile “I will be” Something happened in Lilith’s chest to hear that low, silky voice. They just stood there for a few precious moments. She didn’t know what took over her, as Lilith took Azriel’s hand in hers. She leaned forward when

A woosh sound came from the landing. Azriel looked towards the balcony “I should get going” Lilith blinked, the world coming back into existence. Her face went all the shades of red as they let go of each other's hands. Azriel looked at her; gone was the male who had been here seconds ago. In front of her was the spymaster, cold, calculating. But Lilith saw the way his eyes softened.

Azriel turned towards to balcony. He halted, turning his head “I’ll come back soon” With that, he left.

Lilith narrowed her eyes at the general, who was grinning ear to ear, “What?” She said, taking a slightly aggressive bite of the chicken. He had been looking at her smiling like that for quite some time.

“Nothing” Cassian drawled, “I think I should have stayed in the Town House a bit longer” He teased.

Lilith felt her cheeks warm thinking about what happened before Cassian came “W-why?” She stumbled.

Cassian laughed and shook his head as he got up, “Training 6 a.m.,” he said as he patted her head. Lilith sighed

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith ran towards the Library, “Feyre!” “Nesta!” She screamed. There was an attack ON Velaris. Hybern somehow managed to get inside the wards. Lilith saw Nesta on the 5th floor, panting

“Feyre” - “She went down” Nesta said between pants. Lilith looked at Cassian, who gave her a curt nod as he turned towards the stairs

“They are here for me” Nesta paused. “For all of us,” Lilith saw the silver lining in her eyes

Lilith held Nesta close “Let’s get out of here”

Lilith gaped at her eldest sister; she took something from the cauldron, snatched and grabbed whatever possible. Trying to claw her way out.

A gasp came out of her mouth, her mind going to what she heard Elain speak, ‘Death and Will walk side by side again’. But Lilith wasn’t the will; her power was a drop in a vast ocean compared to what she read. Although Feyre had suspected Nesta’s powers were related to Death

“Lily?” Feyre’s voice came,

“Re-re” Lilith replied, “How are you, truly?”, She touched the tattoo on Feyre’s arm, a bargain she had made a bargain with a death lord.

There was a pause. “I’m working a loophole from it” - “We cannot risk him being free”

We not I not them but We, Lilith's heart left warm at that “Let’s ask Amren” - “If anyone will figure it out, it’s her”

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Heart racing, she knocked on the door. Wide hazel eyes met hers. She held the dagger out, “The shadows got it for me” - “When the library incident happened” Lilith fumbled on her words. He was leaving today, and there was no guarantee when he would return.

As he opened the door fully, Lilith noticed he was armed to the teeth. Azriel’s eyes softened “Keep it” he said, voice soft. Lilith's eyes widened “Really?” she questioned. Azriel nodded, tilting his mouth in a barely visible smile

Lilith smiled and mouthed a thank you, “Leaving soon?” Azriel nodded, “Was just about too”

Lilith opened her mouth and closed it, not knowing how to say that she would miss him, that she would be waiting for him. That she knew there was something, but what she didn’t know. Azriel felt everything, saw the different questions on her face.

“I will be back” He enunciated every word, the shadows danced between both of them

Lilith nodded, the tension slightly easing. They looked at each other for a few seconds before Azriel’s arms wrapped around her. Lilith forgot the outside world as the rich scent of him hit her.

“Don’t get in trouble” he whispered

Gossebumps rose on her body as she felt his breath. “Don’t get hurt” she whispered back. Azriel broke the hug and cleared his throat “I should leave” Lilith gave a slight nod

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

They walked into the house, both chuckling. Lilith had a gleam in her eye

Rhysand took his mate's hands and scanned her face, then looked at his youngest sister, raising a brow, “She wanted to spar” Lilith shrugged “So I knocked the High lady’s ass” Ferye chuckled at that

He sighed. He knew this would happen if Mor trained Lilith. “That she did,” Feyre said “I can’t believe how strong you’ve gotten, Liliy” Feyre smiled at her sister.

They had eaten, Nesta sitting with them, letting her know she would also like to join in the High Lord’s meeting. Lilth was shocked to hear that, but glad that she was doing something.

The door opened and Amren walked in, looking grim “Hybern has made its move” - “They are attacking Adriata as we speak”

𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪

Note: Hii, so I hope you guys enjoyed it. I never thought it would turn into something like a slow-burning kinda thing. But it is, and there was a war scene before, but it was WAY off. And yes, I know Lilith's powers seem off right now, but it's a process I'm trying to build.

Did I wish there was a kiss, absolutely, did i think it was the time? No cause war's at their door, and the Spymaster can't be present

Please do let me know your thoughts

My Taglist <3: @the-onlyy-angie @lreadsstuff @xadenswhore @willowpains @secretsicanthideanymore @a-chegwidden @tele86 @i-am-infinite @booksbypisces @anon1227 @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @sophieliz @nebarious @whore-of-many-hot-men @art1012 @plants-w0rld @bruuuuuuuuuuuuh @mitziix @annamariereads16 @illustrioussanctuarystatue @goldenlove1665 @madeofeverythingjuice @regulusblackstar @wickedpyro @littleemissperfecttt @nikfigueiredo @celestialgilb @thelady-of-dragonfire @ogscoobydoobysnacks @namelesssav @smashee0789 @littowl @watermelomsuger @trippiehippieashley @aurora-maria

Updated parts: Chapter 6

[violetscar656]

Me: Okay, so we need a bridge between what happens and the High Lords' meeting in the third book

Brain: randomly coming up with middle of war scenes, or Lily and Azriel scenes, heck even what will happen 3 chapters from now.

Heart: MAKE THEM KISS

[violetscar656]

i have to say, i'm obsessed with your "A Court of Calm Chaos" fic, it's amazing i think i'm rereading for the 4th time

Thankuu so much, I'm literally crying tears of joy. You have no idea how much I wanted to hear this. Thanku for making my day

[violetscar656]

Court of Calm Chaos - Chapter 4

Summary: Lilith Archeron is the youngest sister, the smart one. The one who with Feyre kept her family going.

Feyre finally arrived back in Velaris. Lilith starts to accept a few things, but life doesn't wait for another to pile up on top.

Warning: None? Multi POV I guess?

Authors' Note: Chapter 4 is finally here, guys. Thank you so much for your support. Sorry it took me this long, I started a new job, and it's been hectic. This one is smaller than the other's I kept thinking if i want to add more towards the end but it felt right ending it there. The next couple of chapters are going to be more towards canon, i.e ACOWAR

Any comments are welcome, please the feedback helps.

Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Lilith’s mind was a mess. High Lady, her sister was the High Lady. They had arrived a few minutes ago, Lilith had seen the blood on her hands and scanned Feyre for any injuries. “It’s not my blood, Lily” Feyre had told. Her eyes assessed the red-headed male, whom Lilith remembered from Hybern, the one who betrayed them. Lucien’s golden eye narrowed “You are High Lady of the Night court”

“Indeed, she is” Lilith snapped her head to where Rhysand stood, no wings, no leathers. Her eyes widen at the sight of Feyre sobbing on the floor. Shock paralysed Lilith; she rarely saw Feyre cry. She was about to move when Rhysand came by her side. Lilith sighed and shook her head

“Go find somewhere else to be” Rhysand commanded, lifting Ferye in his arms. Lilith smiled, seeing them together. Feyre’s eyes locked with hers as she was halfway up the stairs. Lilith nodded to her sister. Later, they will talk about everything, but right now, Rhysand needed this time with her; Lilith understood that.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith looked at the view in wonder, Cassian and Mor with her, as she looked at the clear blue water of the Sidra. Amren had gone to the House of Wind, and Azriel took Lucien. Lilith wasn’t sure if he would come back.

“Liliy” Cassian’s voice came, Lilith looked towards him in question “Drink your tea before it gets cold” Lilith looked at the table, and there it was; she didn’t notice the waiter coming

She took the cup in her hand, the warmth inviting, “Sorry I-”

“Don’t apologise” Cassian said, “You have not seen Velaris yet”

Lilith looked at Mor, “Well, except the palace of Threads and Jewels”

“Liliy, I took you to two shops” - “Just two” Mor exclaimed. Lilith winsed

“She has been busy training” His voice came, and Lilith looked at him; her heart began racing

Azriel smiled, looking at Lilith, “Hey” Lilith forgot how to speak, as she just waved her hand. He had come back; she was nearly sure he wouldn’t, but he did

“Well” Mor began “There is a lot more you need to see” Lilith’s mind stopped working as the shadowsinger sat opposite her, her gaze going towards the Sidra

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Rhysand finally had his mate in his arms; finally, he felt whole again. He had longed to touch her again, to feel her. Feyre glowed like the brightest star. Although he would love to send eternity like this, in their bed, he knew they had to leave soon.

Feyre cupped his face, her eyes full of understanding, then nodded; it was time to leave. They dressed, “When we get there” Rhysand sighed, not knowing what to say “You’ll be meeting Nesta and Elain right now” Rhysand looked at Feyre, guilt in his eyes “Lily” - “Won’t be there” Feyre's brows furrowed. “It’s better if she tells you” Rhysand said

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith didn’t want to be near this house again, not until Nesta and Elain left. But when Mor spoke about a Library, Lilith was more than ready to go. The library, Mor had said, was also a sacturary to priestesses they had recused, each, with their own past. Lilith noticed that when she saw the High priestess, Clotho, it pained her to know what happened to her. Clotho had given permission to Lilith to read any book she would like. So here she was, gaping at the rows and rows of books. Lilith had never seen so many in one place.

“You can stay here as long as you like” Mor said. Lilith was still looking at the books “I think you’ll start living here”

Lilith nodded, “That’s very much possible” Her voice was small, still stunned by the knowledge in this place. Mor chuckled, waved her goodbye and left.

Lilith took a seat near the stairs. At first, she was dumbfounded, lost, not knowing where to start. Clotho had found her wandering in the aisles, with another priestess carrying a stack of books, and she handed Lilith a letter. “The High Lord asked me to keep a few books aside; I’m guessing it was for you. I have added different books as well, for better understanding. Read them in order”. Lilith wanted to hug her, but she smiled and gave her thanks.

Lilith was on the 4th book, the first three containing information she was already aware of, but she read them anyway. It was weird for her. Lilith read all the things about High Fae and magic, but applying the information to herself was difficult. She took a deep breath, as she looked at the book, “The Blessed Bonds” Lilith murmured, she didn’t know why, but her hand trembled lightly while opening the book.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Azriel was standing at the corner, all of his shadows were with him. A few went to her, but came but, Down in the Library, Safe, Reading, We will not disturb his shadows had whispered. Sometimes, he thought his shadows were more attached to Lilith than to him. Azriel had not seen any female who he was interested in, who did not stare at his hands or flinch from his shadows, but her. Mine, the primal part of him thought; he shook his head, concentrating on the current conversation going on.

“She left” Elain said in a small voice. Nesta and Feyre looked at her. Feyre just asked Nesta why Lilith wasn’t here. Instead of telling the truth, Nesta decided to be quiet.

“But why?” Feyre asked, looking towards Nesta, who just skipped the question and said, “That male is not getting near Elain” They were speaking about Lucien. Azriel guessed, he mostly zoned out during half the conversation

It was Cassian who said, “That decision is not up to you” He looked at Elain and then Feyre

Azriel understood the situation the autumn male was in, staying away from his mate and unable to spend time with them, and the pain it caused. He cleared his throat “It will be best if he gets to see her once” All eyes were on him, but he met Nesta’s icy glare. He didn’t recoil from the power beneath them. He glanced at his brothers, who looked at him in understanding; Feyre gave him a look which was half confused, half thankful. Mor, on the other hand, gave him a knowing smile

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Things were discussed, and a few of them were sorted. Feyre sighed and looked at her mate. It was almost dinner time, and Feyre wanted Lilith to be there. Rhysand had just mentioned that Lilith was handling things much better than Nesta and Elain, even training with Mor and trying to figure out her powers.

“I am going to the library” - “I’ll try to convince Lily” Feyre said in Rhysand’s mind

“Don’t be surprised if she doesn't come” Rhysand answered cautiously

Feyre was not aware of what was going on, and it didn’t seem right. She asked Rhysand about Lilith, and all he said was that it’s better if she told me herself. She was walking towards the library, Clotho greeting her with a bow, Feyre stopped her

“That is unnecessary, Clotho” she paused reading the text “You are much like him” Feyre smiled, remembering Rhysand doesn’t like titles in Velaris

“Do you know where my sister is?” Feyre read the note “By the table near the staircase” Feyre said her thanks and walked.

This was the first time Feyre saw Lilith after being made, so in odds with the other two. Lilith had packed some muscle, her hair was longer, and the power it radiated from her; she felt the same with Nesta, but Lilith’s was something else. Feyre didn’t have words. Lilith, it seemed she was adjusting to this new life better; her magic called to Feyre’s.

“Lily” Feyre whispered. Lilith’s head snapped as she smiled at her sister. Feyre was shocked to see the bruises under Lilith’s eyes. She got up and hugged Feyre “Re-re” Lilith sobbed, smiling

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

The tension at the dining table would not be cut even by a knife. Lilith had come, and Feyre somehow managed to convince her to join for dinner. Elain was shocked to see her. Lilith didn’t even glance at the other sister, didn’t even look at Nesta. It was a one-time thing; she will do it for Feyre, only for her. She noticed how Azriel sat beside Elain, shadows nowhere to be seen. He was with her when Lilith entered; it had hurt Lilith; she knew why, but this feeling shouldn’t be there. Azriel was free to do what he liked.

Cassian had tried to cheer her up, but Lilith just shook her head. Lilith just looked down and was not bothered by the conversation going on.

She felt a brush on the wall in her mind. She allowed it in “I’m sorry that Feyre forced your hand” - “Currently she is asking me why things are like this” Rhysand said, “I think it will be better if you tell her”

“What, that they only think about themselves?” Her jaw clenched “I’m here for Feyre, I told her I’ll attend, I didn’t tell her that I’ll be happy”

Rhysand sighed, “You need to tell her Lily” - “She worries” Lilith took a deep breath, finished her meal and got up from the table.

Lilith was currently in her room, looking at the balcony. She had forgotten the beauty of this House, how her rooms overlooked the training ground, the high trees and sky; it was surreal to her. She poured another glass of wine; she had needed this liquid courage. The house it seemed to agree and had provided her it the fruity wine and some cheese, apparently it also knew she didn’t eat properly. A knock came at the door, and Lilith walked towards the door to see Feyre and Rhysand there. She welcomed her sister and raised an eyebrow to the High Lord. Rhysand raised up his hands in defeat and left the sisters.

“Do you think he is still there?” Lilith said teasingly, remembering how the situation was similar to back when they came to their mansion in the Human Lands

Feyre chuckled, “Want a glass?” Lilith asked, glancing at the wine

Feyre shook her head, “No, it’s alright” Lilith sat on the chair, looking at Feyre sitting on the bed, and gave her a small smile

“Are you going to tell me?” Feyre questioned seriously

Lilith grabbed the glass and chucked it, sighing. She told her sister everything, almost. She told her about the magic outburst. How she woke up, about Mor training her and Lilith trying to control her power. She spoke about the fight with Nesta, how her magic appeared then. Except for what happened in the cauldron and the feelings for the shadowsinger, which, for now, Lilith kept for herself. Feyre finally got the answers to Llith’s treatments.

“W-what?” Feyre asked, eyes widening in horror, “Not even once?”, and Lilith gave her a sad smile

“Madja says it’s getting better” Lilith gave a reassuring look. Lilith had gone to Madja just once; she didn’t want to again; right now, she wanted to focus on training, body, mind and magic.

Feyre didn’t smile; instead, she gave Lilith a solemn look, “I know you, Lilith” - “There is more”

Lilith winced at the use of her full name, “It’s nothing re-re” She should have known better; they were things Lilith wasn’t able to accept even to herself.

Feyre opened her mouth in protest, “I think your mate would like you back” Lilith said, trying to dodge the questions she knew her sister would berate her with.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Mor was worried about the war, about Lilith, and everything in between. Currently, she was trying to convince Azriel about telling Lilith without hinting at anything else

“Please, Az - Think about it” Mor said. She had only bought this topic after Nesta and Elain had left, and Feyre was with Lilith. Azriel just shook his head.

Mor scowled. She thought about how he was spending time with Elain “Do you not want her?” The question left her

Azriel glared at Mor, “It’s a blessing for me, Mor” he left things unsaid “What made you think that?” Mor glanced up to Elain’s room and looked back, raising her eyebrows

“That is the cause of me, I’m afraid” Rhysand chimed in “Since Elain was opening to Azriel, I told him to stay with her” Mor narrowed her eyes at her cousin

Cassian clasped Mor's shoulder “He will tell when he is ready” - “And if Lily kicks him in the balls for hiding it from her, then he’ll be ready for that as well” Cassian grinned at Azriel

Azriel's shadows ruffled around him, knowing exactly that Mor will make sure of it.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

The cauldron laughed at her, “You don't know how to use it” it taunted her. She was trapped in the wast, nothing again, she tried everything. Tried to fall asleep, tried to wake herself up,

“Even after She allowed me to bestow this gift, you are not able to control it” the caulron taunted.

She? Who is she? Lilith was suddenly drowning, her limbs were not working, and her breath caught. This was the end, she thought, this is how she’ll go

She jolted awake, covered in sweat. Lilith placed a hand to her chest, I’m here, I’m alive she thought. Lilith wasn’t risking going back to sleep; she was moving the blanket when she noticed it, shadows all around her, around the edges of the bed, on her legs, even covering the other side of the bed.

She walked towards the living room, shadows following her. She saw the back of Azriel’s head, who was sitting in the armchair, the thought of the dream already fading as her heart rate kicked up. She came in front of him “Couldn’t sleep?” She noticed the white knuckled grip Azriel had on the chair.

“Tell me you are alright” Azriel's voice was hoarse. Lilith furrowed her brows, looking at Azriel. He looked in pain. She blinked as a shadow curled up to his ear, understanding dawned upon her, and her eyes widened.

Lilith didn’t reply, walking towards the kitchen, she just took two steps when “Lilith” Azriel’s voice stopped her, she turned her head towards him. Lilith meant to say yes, to nod, but her body betrayed her as she shook her head. She turned, walking to the kitchen again, surprised that she had admitted the truth.

Azriel followed Lilith to the kitchen; he knew better, but he did it anyway. He needed answers, not just a nod or a shake of her head, proper answers. He stood leaning against the doorframe, watching her make a cup of coffee. She looked at him. Azriel was able to feel the rush of emotions through her open bond. He took a deep breath and said, “Do you want to talk about it?” Lilith shook her head, continuing her work. Azriel felt what she did when he called her by her name, a rush of emotion, foreign to both of them, “Lily” She snapped her head to him; his eyes immediately softened.

She cleared her throat “I- I get bad dreams” she paused, as if rethinking her decision, but she said, “It’s mostly about the cauldron” Lilith opened her mouth, then closed it again, not knowing how to explain.

Azriel moved, standing in front of her, the kitchen island in between them. Lilith froze “You don’t have to explain” - “I’m familiar with nightmares” he looked at his hands, then gave a sad smile to Lilith. She took an audible breath, understanding, anger and an emotion he couldn’t place reached him

“Tell me when you're ready” Azriel said, then quickly added, “If you want to, that is” Lilith smiled at him and said a small “Okay”.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith reached the training ground at dawn, the conversation with Azriel still running in her mind. She was surprised to see Cassian there “Morning” He didn’t look the usual, jolly general Lilith had known. Today, Cassian was serious, no smile to be seen, as if a million things were going through his mind.

“Your training with me today” He declared. It was not a surprise; Mor had a lot on her plate. She told Lilith a few days ago that Cassian might be taking over. Lilith nodded and started doing the warm-up exercises.

Lilith dodged her head to the left and, in a blink, spun right. Metal clacked as their swords met. Cassian smirked. He moved, spinning and aiming left. Lilith dodged. She moved, swinging the sword as if she had practised for years. In a way, she had, the times when she used to hunt, it was somewhat like this, going back and forth, predator and prey. The curves while carving an animal were similar to how to use a dagger. Lilith was lost in these thoughts as muscle memory and instinct took over. It wasn’t Cassian attacking; it was another hunter, trying to steal their food. It wasn’t training, it was survival. The snowy mountains and two young girls fighting, with hunters who had stolen their deer. Lilith was barely 10 years old; the men taunted them that they did not need a whole deer to feed themselves. Lilith tried to fight them, but she was so weak. They went home with one small rabbit that day for a family of five.

She felt the air shift from left and lifted the sword, and a hand on her shoulder, “Lily” Cassian said, worry lining his tone

Lilith blinked, gone was the memory, she looked at Cassian, “Lily, are you alright?” Cassian asked

Lilith furrowed her brows and nodded, “Your eyes are glowing”, Cassian said as he got his right hand up. Shock rippled through Lilith, “How?” She asked, studying Cassian’s bloody arm, she looked at her sword, which was covered in blood “Cass, I’m so sorry” Lilith’s voice was trembling

Cassian grinned, “Don’t worry” - “I have had worse” he paused “Are you alright?”

Lilith nodded, “Are you sure?” Cassian asked again, Lilith gave a small smile, “Yes” - “H- how?” Lilith questioned

Cassian sighed, “You” he paused, “First I’d like to just say that there is nothing wrong” “That you did nothing wrong” he paused “We were training normally and I felt the shift in you, like your mind was somewhere else, but your body kept moving” he paused “Your eyes started to radiate this light” - “But nothing else” Llith sighed, giving an apologetic look to Cassian, who just smiled and said “Lets get me badanged up”

They sat at the table, Lilith’s face reflecting guilt, as she ate her oatmeal. Cassian cleared up his throat “You know you were good today” Lilith looked at him “Even if I almost cut your hand off?”

Cassian snorted, “You barbely kicked me, Lil” Lilith blinked at the name “Do you want to talk about it?” Lilith knew what he meant, what got her ramped up. She sighed, “Just a memory while me and Feyre used to hunt” - “I want to forget all that, but-” Lilith stared at her plate, wondering why the memories of her old life were coming to her randomly in flashes

“You know how Rhys, Az and I became friends right? Cassian said, as Lilith nodded, ”Well even after Rhys’s mother took me in, I used to get memories” Cassian paused “Sometimes I’d think it’s all a joke, it’s all a dream, and I’d end up on the camp streets again” Cassian's eyes met Lilith’s in understanding “I was happy truly, but there was some part of me that didn’t adjust to all of it” - “To have a roof above my head, hot food, and everything else” - “A part of mind mind still lived in those days where I had to fight for bare nessecities” Lilith’s gaze went distant “But it went by” Cassian said “When I gave myslef to breath” Lilith understood the point he wanted to make, and was thankful he didn’t say it outright

She looked up at Cassian, “You're a good male, Cass” giving him a small smile “Thank you” Cassian grinned.

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith sat upon the tallest tree. She came here after unpacking her things in her room, excited to stay at the House of Wind again. Earlier today, Rhysand told her that Nesta and Elain were going to shift to the Town House. Lilith smiled, looking at the sky; the starry night of Velaris never seemed to amaze her. It was the most beautiful thing, an image of Azriel taking her flying came to her mind. Lilith's heart thumped; she closed her eyes and tried to calm her heart. Tomorrow, she thought, she will think, no training, no research, just being. Maybe she can go out, to the rainbow, and see if there are any good book shops, but not for research. She will treat herself to something sweet, Lilith's imagination paused; she wanted to do all this, but with the friends she made here. Lilith can’t ask them to just give them a full day at this time. Her eyes went to the starry night sky again.

“Liliy” Mor’s voice came, as Lilith walked into the living room, the female hugged her

Lilith smiled, “Good to see you back, Mor” Lilith looked at everybody seated in the living room; the whole inner circle was present

Lilith furrowed her eyebrows, walking in, “Am I interrupting something?” She saw, as Amren, unbound a book

“This” That’s all Lilith was able to hear before voices began coming in her head

“Power, Will, Come to me, Use me, Read me, Unleash it, It will happen soon”. The voices jumbled in her ear; she couldn’t make sense of them. There was a sudden shift. But the voice beckoned to her, called on to something inside her. The power within her, boiling, reaching towards that voice

A familiar rough hand held hers, “Can you hear me?” Azriel said “Liliy”

There was a shift again, Lilith blinked “Put the book down, angel” Azriel said, his voice was soft but full of worry

Lilith's senses came back; she was holding the book of breathings, and she didn’t know how she got here when she held the book. She looked at the familiar hazel eyes, which were like an anchor. Lilith's gaze travelled to the rest of the room, each of them looked worried and terrified, but Amren smirked. With a trembling hand, she placed the book down, Azriel still holding her other hand.

Lilith swallowed “I-I don’t know” Her voice was trembling “H-how”

“It called to you” Amren said, “Just like I suspected” Lilith's head snapped to the female; those silver eyes glowed a little

“Amren” Feyre said as the High Lady “Explain - “Why would you do that?”

Amren shook her head and just said, “I suspected it” Lilith felt Azriel's hand tremble, and she held it tighter

“She is blessed not just by the cauldron” Amren paused, looked at Rhysand, who gave a cret nod “But also by the Mother”.

𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪

Note: Hi guys, I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Thank you for your support. I know this one is shorter than the rest. But it was just sitting in my drafts for weeks, about 70% done. My mind wasn't able to come up with more scenes, so I just posted this.

My Taglist <3: @the-onlyy-angie @lreadsstuff @xadenswhore @willowpains @secretsicanthideanymore @a-chegwidden @tele86 @i-am-infinite @booksbypisces @anon1227 @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @sophieliz @nebarious @whore-of-many-hot-men @art1012 @plants-w0rld @bruuuuuuuuuuuuh @mitziix @annamariereads16 @illustrioussanctuarystatue @goldenlove1665 @madeofeverythingjuice @regulusblackstar @wickedpyro @littleemissperfecttt @nikfigueiredo @celestialgilb @thelady-of-dragonfire @ogscoobydoobysnacks @namelesssav

Updated Parts: Chapter 5 Chapter 6

[violetscar656]

Court of Calm Chaos - Chapter 3

Summary: Lilith Archeron is the youngest sister, the smart one. The one who with Feyre kept her family going. What happened after Feyre left to Spring Court, and Lilith moved in the Town House

Warnings: bad words? A smidge of fluff (I really don't know how to do warnings, please someone help me out)

Author's Note: Sorry guys it took a long time, my laptop got damaged and I had to finish this from my phone. If there are spelling mistakes or anything I apologize. This is another chapter Lilith building relations

Any comments are welcome!

Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2

She was swimming in the vast nothingness; there was no voice speaking to her, but there was laughter. As if the cauldron knew something, like it was planning events. She swam and swam, searching for the female sound she heard; there were times when she heard the voice. But there were times like this, when she didn’t, caught in an endless loop. She had to wake up, had to get out of this nightmare. She halted, trying to fall asleep in the dream, it had worked for her before. Falling asleep in the dream made her awake in reality. So, Lilith tried to close her eyes, ignoring the slimy laughter. 

Suddenly, she wasn’t able to breathe; she didn’t have any air, water filling her throat and mouth.

She jolted awake up gasping for air. Lilith looked at the dark room, the only light cast by the moon. She turned on the side lamp. She knew she wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep, so she headed to the kitchen.

It was an hour before dawn, and Lilith was sitting on one of the chairs in the kitchen island, wide awake, sipping on a cup of coffee. She initially went to the living room, like most nights, but she saw the General sprawled on the sofa and took her leave. He has been living in the Town House for a while. His excuse was to help Lilith train, but she knew better; it was because of what happened with her sisters. 

Lilith smiled, looking at the shadow circling her wrist; a few of them were always following her, they never seemed to leave her side. It was shocking to others at first, but Lilith didn’t mind it; it always felt like Azriel was with her. Although they barely had time together, she missed the shadowsinger, with the injury he got at Hybern, sending his spy’s to notice Spring’s movements and protecting Nesta and Elain. Azriel was well, too busy; Lilith didn’t know if the shadows that followed her came at their own will, or if he sent them. She bit her lip, wondering why she felt comforted if he had sent them. 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Mor was late. Rhysand had told Lilith that she was in Hewn City, the Court of Nightmares, Rhysand had called it. Lilith understood the politics of Night Court; she didn’t understand the why behind it. 

She finished her stretches and began a few exercises that Mor had taught her. From her peripheral vision, she noticed a winged male, but her target was the dummy in front of her. She went with the combinations 1-2-2-1-2-1. 

“Create an unpredictable rhythm” Mor had said 

Lilith punched again 2-1-2-2-1 and then 1-2-2-1-1

“Your right punches are weak” She halted and whipped her head to see Cassian

Panting, she said, “I know” - “I need to work on that” Lilith faced the dummy 

Cassian walked towards the benches and grabbed something “The dummy won’t know the difference” He stood before Lilith, wearing two pads over his hands. Lilith nodded 

Standing before the General, Lilith took her stance, she began 2-1-2-2-1

“There” Cassian halted her “When you throw the punches with your right, you're still distributing your weight as if it’s a left punch” - “Watch me” He said, giving Lilith the pads 

“This is what you are doing” Cassian said while demonstrating a 2-1-2-2-1 combo 

“Now hold steady and look at my legs” Cassian went for a 2-1-2-2-1 combination again, but this time his legs and thighs kept bending when he punched from his right “Do you get it?” 

Lilith nodded, gave the pads to Cassian, and took a fighting stance again 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

She was alone in the house, Cassian going off to Illyria with Rhysand and Mor still stuck in Hewn City. Lilith was bored; the shadows kept her company, though, one of them tucked at Lilith’s shirt, she furrowed her brows. It guided Lilith to the other side of the house, and there in the corner facing the window, was a beautiful grand piano. Lilith took an audible breath. 

Nobody was in the house, the shadows won’t tell anyone if Lilith asks them not too. Pressing her lips together, she scanned the area one more time, double-checking if she was alone. 

She sat down on the bench, her hands settling on the keys as a reflex. She paused, thinking about it for a minute, and started playing. The melody started off sad, as Lilith thought about the cauldron, about the dangers that were still unknown, the war, the bitter truth that she was not ready to fight physically yet. It started becoming haunting when she thought of the things she told Nesta, things Nesta told her, her powers lashing out. Lilith wished, Gods, did she wish to have some amount of control over her magic. She noticed the shadows slowly twirling all around. She closed her eyes, a tear falling from her cheek, as she thought of Azriel, imagining his hazel eyes. Why was his voice so familiar to her, like she knew it from somewhere? Why can’t she place it? The melody turned a little calmer as she thanked the Mother for the second chance in life, the possibility of a long life and not a painful short one. She opened her watery eyes with a small smile. 

And for the first time since she was a little child, Lilith felt like singing. She paused, recalling the songs. As a voice came from far end 

“Lily?” Mor shouted “Lily” 

Lilith’s cheeks flushed, she entered the nearest room, her heart rate increasing, and she looked around to find, Lilith blinked, seeing the rows of books. She didn’t know if she should be here, but there were so many books. She went and grabbed one 

“History of Gods and Magic” Lilith murmured, looking at the title 

The door flew open “I knew you would find this place” Mor declared 

Lilith gave a sheepish smile “What is that?” Mor asked, standing next to Lilith 

“AH! These are Rhysand's study materials when we were still getting groomed, and not the High Lord,” Mor said, Lilith raised up her brows 

Her voice was small “Do you think I can read these?” Lilith asked 

“I don’t see why not” Mor replied “But not now, please, food in Hewn is barely edible” “Join me?” Mor asked, Lilith shook, smiling, and then nodded 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Cassian had found her in the old study, sitting on the floor, surrounded by books. The request to read them had come by when he and Rhysand were in Illyria, and his brother did give her permission to read all the books she wished. Lilith was doing exactly that.

He knocked on the open door once again, but she didn’t reply, still had her head buried in the book 

“Liliy” he entered “Take a break” She finally looked up, purple and blue under her eyes, but she gave a small smile, and shook her head 

“Just a few pages left” She said, waving the book. 

Cassian sighed as she started reading again. 

Azriel had come to the Town House, eager to meet her. They were all gathered for dinner. He had been staying in the House of Wind for so long, but the place didn’t feel right without her there. But Cassian had just told him 

“She has buried herself in books” 

It felt like a small eternity since he hadn’t seen Lilith; his shadows that stayed with Lilith didn’t whisper anything. So he walked to the other side of the house. 

Lilith's brows furrowed at the context; she had finished reading the book. Realms? Gods blessing on each court? She picked up another book. A knock came from the door, and all the shadows rushed towards it, which was new. She replied with a come in, and buried her head in yet another book. 

Cedar and night-chilled breeze hit her, as the door opened, she knew that scent very well. Lilith didn’t look up, as her heart pounded 

“Hey” Azriel began “Join us for dinner?” 

Lilith turned to see the window. Was it already dinner time? She swore that she had finished her morning training an hour ago. 

Azriel looked at her, with tousled hair, dark circles under her eyes,by the cauldron, she looked exhausted. She got up, and was about to trip when his hand caught her by the waist, he didn’t realize when he moved. They just stood there looking in each other's eyes, Lilith’s lips parted. He didn’t know what overcame him when he said, “I missed you” He swore that he could see a sparkle in Lilith’s eyes. 

She let go and nodded, “Dinner” Her eyes were still locked on his. “Dinner” He replied 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

They were sitting in the living room. Lilith wanted to go back to the study room, but selfishly, a part of her wanted to stay because of Azriel. The dinner went by fine; by all the possibilities, she ended up sitting opposite him, again. Lilith had slowly began to figure out the feelings and well it was the truth that she liked Azriel, not in the way she did Mor or Cassian but in the way that her eyes sought his

“I hear you have buried yourself in books, youngest one” Amren said, sitting beside Lilith “Find anything?” 

Lilith looked at Amren “Not much” she paused “Yet” Lilith was curious about why Amren called her ‘youngest’ or ‘youngest one’, she had a name. 

Rhysand spoke up “Well, I think you have searched enough for today” 

“Here” she saw Mor handing out a wine glass to her, Lilith raised a brow in question, and Mor chuckled 

She took the glass and sniffed the contents. The scent was sweet, and Lilith took a sip. She blinked in surprise, liking the flavour. She had wine before, in her previous life, but it wasn’t like this; it was sour and bitter at the same time. She took another sip 

“Go easy” - “Fairy wines are quite strong” Mor warned, while Lilith gave a small smile, looked Mor directly in the eye and took another sip 

Amren huffed, “Well, they do say the youngest are rebels” 

Lilith looked at her and said, “Why?” Amren raised a brow “Why do you call me the youngest one?” Lilith asked calmly, but also curiously. 

“Aren’t you the youngest?” Amren shot back, from the corner of her eye, she noticed Azriel stiffen 

Lilith eyed Amren, and nodded, “That’s true” She paused “Ancient one” 

The whole room, including Amren, burst into laughter. Lilith turned her head to where the shawdowsinger stood, and saw him chuckling under his breath. 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

All three brothers sat in the office, needing this time together. They were discussing the war, each of them haunted by the previous one in their way. 

Rhysand leaned back in chair “How are Nesta and Elain?” he asked Azriel, to which he shrugged 

“Well, Elain is speaking a bit” Azriel replied. Rhysand had asked him to look after the sisters, but especially Elain. Somehow, she was comfortable enough around Azriel to speak; most of her words were like riddles, though. Nesta, well, he didn’t want to think about that situation. 

He looked at Cassian “Are you planning on staying here?” Azriel asked 

Cassian rubbed his hands together, then sighed, “Although I want to” - “I know I have to go back eventually” 

Rhysand nodded, “Exchange shifts?” Azriel suggested, he was tired of staying at the House of Wind, most of his shadows were either with his mate or gathering information. 

Cassian huffed, “Oh, you would love that, won’t you?” 

Rhysand spoke up, “Elain is opening up to you, Az” - “And I completely understand why you want to stay here” Rhysand glanced at the door “Lilith is fine, more than fine actually” - “She can use a little concentration right now, and with what we noticed at the dinner-” he trailed off 

Azriel's brow furrowed, having no clue whatsoever, the dinner at least to him went perfectly alright. Cassian looked at him “Seriously” he began “You, the spymaster, didn’t notice it?” 

Azriel gave him a confused look, Rhysand smirked, and Cassian barked out a laugh, “Lilith with others is calm and collected. When you are there, well” “It’s like this one” He jerked his chin towards Rhysand “When Feyre and he weren’t mated” 

“Speaking of which” Rhysand said “When are you going to tell her?” 

Azriel's throat moved on a swallow “There is too much going on right now” he began 

“So was at the time when Feyre got to know” Rhysand replied “You better tell her before a Suriel does” He chuckled 

Shadows coocened him, not knowing how to tell his brothers the actual reason

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Mor entered the training ground and saw Cassian and Azriel, she looked around 

“Where’s Lilith” - “She is never late” She said to no one in particular. She shook her head, the Illyrian males not even bothering to turn. 

Mor walked back inside, and knocked on Lilith bedroom door, no answer. She went to the study room knocked and opened the door and found her subordinate sitting on the ground, books opened in front of her and Lilith taking notes. Mor walked inside “Lily?” She didn’t respond 

There was a look on Lilith face which was so similar, planning, strategizing, connecting the dots. She shook Lilith shoulder, a gasp ran from her. Lilith looked towards Mor eyes wide

“Mor” Lilith said, as she got up “Sorry I lost track of time” 

“It’s alright” Mor paused “Did you find something” 

Lilith furrowed her brows “Its complicated” she looked at her notes and then the books “It’s like a puzzle to which I have layed very few pieces” 

“Care to share?” Mor asked knowing Lilith would like to 

Lilith shook her head, glancing at the notepad “Not yet” she needed to find more pieces to this puzzle 

Lilith walked towards training ground, wearing the Illyrian leathers Cassian gave her. They were comfortable, and had places to hide daggers. Reaching the grounds she haulted, seeing him spar. Shirtless. Her heart raced so much it hurt. She couldn’t take eyes off Azriel, each inch of this body seemed to be craved by the Gods themselves 

“Are you done ogling” Mor’s voice came, Mor was the first one to call out her crush on the shadowsinger, Lilith didn’t correct her by saying it was more than that. 

Right now Lilith wasn’t able to take eyes off him. She knew better than to openly stare at a male. She noticed Azriel’s head slowly moving towards where she stood, just a little. A foreign sensation ran through her veins. 

Mor apparently didn’t care and swept Lilith’s feet down “Attention” Lilith grunted, getting up from the ground 

Taking a stance in front of Mor, they began. 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

A throat cleared “Are you sure wanna continue, with her” Rhysand asked, after training they came for breakfast, noticing the High Lord already at the table. Cassian and Azriel had joined, both had put on their shirts, thank the Gods. Mor winnowed away saying something about a meeting. It was the first time Lilith was alone with all these three. She tried to keep her gaze away from Azriel as much as possible 

Lilith looked at Rhysand “Yes” she liked Mor’s training the female didn’t hold back. Today Lilith finally did some damage to Mor, who was so proud that she stopped everything and gave Lilith a hug. 

“Why are few books in a different language” Lilith asked out of blue 

“That was totally random” Cassian said huffing 

Rhysand placed his hands on the table “It’s the old language of Fae” - “I can help you translate, if you want” Lilith nodded. 

“We should get ready to leave” Cassian said putting a hand on Azriel’s shoulder, Rhysand gave a nod 

“You two are leaving today?” Lilith voice was hesitant, Cassian nodded. Lilith looked at Azriel, she knew he would leave but this soon? Azriel’s eyes finally met Lilith’s. They were things unsaid between them, Lilith wanted him to stay here, it was selfish, she didn’t know why but she felt at ease with him nearby, despite her attraction to him.

We’ll give you two a moment Rhysand said in Azriels mind, the two males stood and left 

Lilith didn’t let her eyes wander, “Are you alright?” Azriel asked 

Lilith nodded “Are you? She asked 

Azriel gave her a small smile “Here” he held out a small container “It’s a pain relief salve” - “I saw how you get after Mor’s training” 

Lilith stretched out her hand and took it “Thank you” she had this sudden urge to hug the male, there was a brief silence between them

“This will sound silly” Lilith said, finally about to ask something she wished “But when you are free” she bit her lip “Will you take me flying?” She could have asked Cassian or even Rhysand but Azriel brought out a different part of her, someone that was carefree and Lilith wanted to feel that more 

Azriel was silent for awhile, surprised by the request. She was his mate, he felt something through the bond from Lilith, which he couldn’t place. He placed a hand on top of hers, holding gently “Yes” - “I will” Her eyes widen and her cheeks flushed, not at the answer, but where his hand met hers. Lilith didn’t know from where the courage came in her as she held his hand tight 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

“This one” Rhysand said “It means powers” He trailed a finger to the sentence below “It talks about cauldron’s powers” - “What they are” Rhysand had never read this book, in his youth he didn’t understand the writing, so they were many books in this room that were unread 

They were in the study room, Lilith sitting on the ground as usual, Rhysand was about to summon chairs but stopped, and sat beside her sister. Somewhere down the line Lilith had become that to him, a sister. She was willing to fight for his court, and gave a peace to his brother. Rhysand knew very well what Azriel is going through; maybe he should have let him stay. After what challenges life threw at them they deserve the few moments before a war- 

“Isn’t cauldron limitless” Rhysand came out of his stupor at Lilith’s question 

He shook his head clearing his thoughts “Yes and No” he answered “It says over here there are sort of sections of powers” 

Rhysand pointed at a page “Time” he turned to another “Element” a page flipped “Life” another page “Death” he turned the page again and looked at it, as if unsure of what it was “I believe this says Will” 

“So each powers are somehow linked to these, what are these categories?” It was more of a answer, Lilith grabbed her notepad 

“The courts” she began “I think they fall under time” Remember the seven courts of Prythian 

Lilith’s mind raced, trying to figure out the possibilities

Her brows furrowed “But powers of the courts are elemental” remembering Mor telling her the powers of each courts 

“Healing magic can be a type of life” Rhysand said, Lilith nodded; different courts, different elementary magic. Healing under life. Lilith felt like she was missing something, like she forgot a vital information. 

Rhysand stood up and grabbed a book which saw better days 

“This is about the controlling magic” Rhysand began “I read it a thousand times” - “But I’m more of the practical type” he handed the book to Lilith “You don’t have to, but it won’t hurt if you read it” Lilith knew what he meant she didn’t have to summon the magic, he will not ask her to do that, but Rhysand wanted her to atleast have the knowledge. 

She saw him not with the assessing sight but with understanding. She already was familiar with the reason behind sadness on his face. The dullness in this eyes. 

“Rhysand” Lilith said “She’ll be alright” Rhysand knew who Lilith spoke about, he placed a hand above his heart and gave her a small smile nodding

“Call me Rhys, Lilith” the High Lord said “Your family” 

Lilith smiled “Only if you call me Lily” he extended his hand towards her, and Lilith shook it 

“Deal” they both said in unison 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Lilith knocked on the last door she ever thought. Amren opened the door surprise to see her. Lilith had asked Rhysand to take her there, she finished the book and wanted to try practicing. She knew Amren taught control to her brother. Rhysand was taken back by the request, but didn’t question it. 

“Youngest one” Amren said in the way of greeting 

Lilith narrowed her eyes “Ancient one” she replied, Amren open the door further and gestured Lilith in. She noticed the book she was holding, and smirked 

“I suppose your here for a reason” Amren said glancing at the familiar book, Lilith nodded 

She twisted the cloth of the hem of her shirt “I want to try something” Lilith said 

Amren noticed the action “You need to be sure girl, we don’t go around playing with powers” 

Lilith took a deep breath “I’m sure” 

They were sitting facing each other, Amren telling her to reach for her powers, she tried and failed two times. Amren lectured her, and told her to recall the things that happened in the cauldron, what part made her feel more. Lilith sat there and went dove deep, her body was trembling, her eyes were closed and she heard her voice, her mothers voice 

She was in the study on her father’s library, trying to understand the maps. Her mother had found her there, and dragged her to the dancing lessons. Lilith never liked dancing but her mother forced her telling her that she and Nesta had the figure of a dancers. 

Lilith felt so much sorrow, the apparent lights dimmed. Distantly she she heard Amren saying “Hold on to that” Lilith tried as another memory surfaced 

Lilith’s Mother always commented on how such graceful legs were mismatched with her face. Wishing Elain had it rather than Lilith. Her mother always compared her to Elain, she was the beauty. 

All the lights went out Amren looked around in wonder 

She was standing in the garden , her mother held her by her chin. Lilith was covered in mud and leaves. She was playing with the children of the house help. Her mother had called her a low disgrace and had slapped her 

Furniture began shaking, “Calm down girl” Lilith felt angry at the last memory, she was just 5 at that time, the room filled with the sound of metal scrapping on wood “Control the power don’t let the power control you” Lilith tried to, her mothers words had hurt, the promise she made Lilith make also did. Amren called out “Lilith” maybe it was the tone Amren said it in, maybe it was the grounding of her hands on Lilith’s shoulders. But Lilith heard that familiar voice 

Come back, Come back to me, I’ll wait, Come back to me, I’ll wait the words repeated again and again in her head. 

Lilith finally opened her eyes to see a stunned wide eyed Amren in front of her. She looked around and noticed few things out of place. Lilith looked at Amren again “What happened?” 

Amren let go “What happened is that you need proper set up for this power girl” - “I’m fond of this place” 

Lilith narrowed her eyes not satisfied with the answer, Amren sighed “What ever you were feeling” she paused thinking how to say it “The lights went out and things began to shake” 

Lilith furrowed her brows, it’s similar to what happened the last time, was this her power turning off lights and moving things? Lilith had thanked Amren and left. 

Lilith just came out of the shower, when few tendrils of shadows came to her, excited she changed quickly, and head out, but Azriel wasn’t there, her smile fell. 

“There you are” Rhysand voice came as he emerged from his office, Lilith gave a wave tendrils of shadows on her hand 

“Someone came back” Lilith gave a small smile looking at shadows, Rhysand eyes softened at the sight. He walked towards Lilith and asked “How were things with Amren” 

Lilith sighed looking at her brother “I can turn off lights and move objects” she paused “I’m a party trick” she said dryly 

Rhysands brows climbed up “It took me years to control my powers, for you to do it in such small time is nothing short of a miracle” 

“But enough of work right now” - “I’m actually glad I ran into you” Lilith gave a confused look “With Azriel not able to fly long distances and Mor being in Hewn, I’m going to be away for a awhile” Lilith nodded in understanding 

“I’ll be alright” She said, Rhysand gave her a mischievous smile, before he winnowed away 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

Azriel was taking his frustration out on a poor dummy in the training field at the House of Wind. He wasn’t able to sleep, so he came here to tire himself, thoughts of Lilith filled his mind. She is so young, and she is shackled to him. He looked at his hands, he knew she deserved someone better, someone whose hands weren’t covered in so much blood. 

Cassian whistled “What did the poor thing do to you Az?” Azriel didn’t reply, continuing the punches

Cassian stopped him “What’s wrong?” Azriel looked at the ground, Cassian knew his brother well enough for the reason of this type of brooding, it was not about the war “Lily will choose you” Azriel heads snapped to his brothers “Everyone can see she feels something for you” - “I don’t know how you’re so oblivious” Cassian huffed 

Was it true? Did Lilith feel something for him? He was staying as far away as possible, but it was so difficult to stay away from her. “You just need to stop thinking you don’t deserve this and whatever bullshit goes in that head” - “Take a step towards her” He gave a cert nod to Cassian 

𓆩༺✧༻𓆪

“It’s not polite to sneak up like that” Lilith said to Azriel, shifting in the chair. The spymaster had randomly appeared behind her while she was eating breakfast the next morning. It wasn’t that she was disappointed to see Azriel but more towards what she wore as she opted to for a loose tunic and shorts which barely covered her thighs thinking she is alone. Lilith won’t usually care about this, but at the same time she already felt Azriel saw too much, and the current situation wasn’t helping. 

Lilith narrowed her eyes as he sat on the table “So” Azriel began “What would you like to do today” Lilith opened her mouth and closed it, her thought process jumbling up, she took a deep breath “I’m not sure” she said, genuinely. She wanted to play the piano again, but well that was not going to happen 

Azriel looked at her warmly, there were a lot of things he wanted to do with Lilith, but all the things he planned had to wait, for now 

He stood up “Let’s go” he handed Lilith his hand 

Lilith cheeks flushed, she didn’t want to get up, but she mustered up the courage and took him hand “I did promise to take you flying” Lilith beamed, Azriel’s eyes widened and his lips parted at the sight of her smiling ear to ear; it’s not like she didn’t smile but this was the first time she had grinned, it was the most beautiful she looked. 

Azriel throat cleared, as he averted his gaze from her “Mabye you should change first” Lilith cheeks went red, as she turned and half ran half walked towards her room. 

It was beyond magical, seeing the city like this. Lilith’s gaze went to the city below and to the sky above. When they left her heart was racing because Azriel was holding her close, now there was another reason. She had told him long ago that she loved to see the scenes change from heights. But flying was so much freeing than climbing different trees. 

They hadn’t spoken much, but her instincts told her that his eyes were mostly on her rather than the sky. Lilith turned her head towards Azriel, and as she predicted the male was looking at her. Lilith smiled. She looked at his wings, they were massive, an urge to touch them came upon her; she moved her hand upward, and Azriel’s grip tightened on her, she paused and looked at Azriel who was now seeing ahead, she lowered her hand down. 

Lilith looked towards the sky and felt the wind on her face, forgetting what happened. 

They landed back in the Town House

“That was” Lilith shook her head “It was more than amazing” she looked at him “Thank you Azriel” 

His heart began beating faster, this was the first time she had called him by his name, he felt hot. On the flight his body screamed, when she was about the touch his wings Azriel wanted to roar. But he moved towards her and looked at her, maybe Rhys was right she deserved to know. 

“Lilith” Azriel voice was hoarse, Amren calling her ‘youngest one’ ran in Azriel’s mind, seventeen, she was just seventeen. No, he wouldn’t shackle her to him when she just started living, so he said “I’m glad you enjoyed” He smiled at her, it didn’t matter whether she will have him, for now, seeing her happy was more than enough for him. 

Lilith stepped forward, and hugged Azriel. He froze for a heartbeat then two, and then finally embraced her. 

“Feyre is at the border of winter, go now” Rhysand’s voice rang in his mind 

Azriel broke the hug, his expression changing, Lilith gave him a confused look “Stay here” he ordered “It’s Feyre she is in winter court” Lilith took a step forward eyes wide “It’s dangerous” Azriel knew what she was going to say “Please Lily” he placed his hands on her shoulders “Stay here, please” 

It was the plea and worry in his voice that made Lilith nod and said “I’ll wait” she looked at his wide eyes. 

Azriel went to the balcony , he turned his head back “I’ll come back soon” he said and took off

𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪 𓆩⟡𓆪

Note: Yes I did it, (not the whole typing on my phone,) but Lilith and Azriel getting close, guys I had too , I want them to have like this tense relation but not do anything about it cause of the situation. They were so many time I thought of adding a kiss and I was like nope even if this couple wants to not now. I hope you enjoyed this part as much as you guys did the others

I swear it was a pain to write but worth it! And yes the ‘ancient one’ remark was also living rent free in my mind since chapter 1 . Thank you all so much for your support

My taglist <3: @the-onlyy-angie @lreadsstuff @xadenswhore @willowpains @secretsicanthideanymore @a-chegwidden @tele86 @i-am-infinite @booksbypisces @anon1227 @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @sophieliz @nebarious @whore-of-many-hot-men @art1012 @plants-w0rld @bruuuuuuuuuuuuh @mitziix @annamariereads16 @illustrioussanctuarystatue @goldenlove1665 @madeofeverythingjuice @regulusblackstar @wickedpyro @littleemissperfecttt @nikfigueiredo @celestialgilb

Updated Parts: Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6

[violetscar656]

Can you please tag me when you post chapter 3 (Please tag me whenever you post Court of Calm Chaos from now on)

Hii and sure, I’m sorry it’s taking longer than expected

[violetscar656]

Can i be part of your taglist please?

Hii and sure , working on chapter 3 , my laptop gave up, so sorry it’s gonna take some time