suffer endlessly

idk im just here. not terribly active but still alive mass like/rb ok

[girlfictions]

— Fiona Apple

[17761]

to avoid disappointment expect nothing from nobody

[screenshotsofdespair]

[feelingsoftheday]

Don’t get too attached, people always leave.

[cranesofibycus]

Does anybody else grow tired of their trauma sometimes? Like, it's just so exhausting to keep coming back to the same fucking issues and triggers and flashbacks over and over and over again. I'm tired of talking about it. I'm tired of thinking about it. I feel like it takes so much energy to carry it around with me all the time and even more energy to pretend that I'm not actually carrying it around at all. It's such a specific kind of fatigue. Like when you get a song stuck in your head to the point where it gets super annoying and uncomfortable and all you want is to listen to 30 other songs to stop that one melody from ping-ponging around your synapses.

[asoftwrongness]

#70

[sunlit-mess]

nothing new

[sunlit-mess]

im 18 but i feel like a child

[curlicuecal]

Whenever I take a long car ride I end up exhausted afterwards, and I'm always like "why am I so tired? I was just sitting around doing nothing all day."

But the answer, it turns out, is I was doing something. Riding in a car jars your body in many directions and requires constant microadjustments of your muscles just to stay in place and hold your normal posture. Because you're inside the car, inside the situation, it's easy not to notice all the extra work you're doing just to maintain the status quo.

There's all sorts of work that we think of as "free" that require spending energy: concentrating, making decisions, managing anxiety, maintaining hypervigilance in an unfriendly environment, dealing with stereotype threat, processing a lot of sensory input, repairing skin cells damaged by sun exposure, trying to stay warm in a cold room.

The next time you think you're tired from "nothing", consider instead that you're probably in situation where you're doing a lot of unnoticed extra work just to stay in place.

[chronicallylav3nd3r]

a reminder for anyone with bpd who needs to hear it

- having bpd does not make you abusive

- having bpd does not make you manipulative

- having bpd does not make you a bad person

- having bpd does not make you a bad partner

- having bpd does not make you a bad friend

- having bpd does not mean that you’re over-dramatic

having bpd isn’t problematic, only your actions matter

[exhaustedborderline]

[vybewitme]

It’s just safer being silent these days

[walkinredinstead]

Self Diagnosis

So apparently it’s time for another self dx info post because people are gross

INFO:

basics

self diagnosis isn’t looking at one post and going “hey thats me, im autistic”

self diagnosis includes research and introspection

self diagnosis of multiple disorders is reasonable - comorbidity is common (see: autism and ADHD, ADHD and SPD, many personality disorders with each other, though more than one is rarely diagnosed due to overlapping traits)

self diagnosis doesn’t take away resources from anyone

the only people who don’t take a disorder seriously “because of” self diagnosis don’t take it seriously anyway

the DSM is available online

it doesn’t matter if they’re wrong - if they’re self diagnosing it’s because they had a problem and the resources and coping mechanisms within ____ community helped them. 

re: doctors

many doctors refuse to diagnose

a lot of these reasons are racism and sexism

some traits/symptoms are internal and are therefore not seen by doctors

doctors diagnose based on behavior. people self-dx based on.. behavior.

re: racism, classism, sexism

many poc (especially black people) are diagnosed with “being {race}”

many people who are perceived as girls won’t be diagnosed because {sexist reason such as ‘girls cant get autism’ - yes thats a real reason people have been denied diagnosis}

going to a professional is expensive. it doesn’t matter if you were “obviously _____” or not - it’s expensive.

[walkinredinstead]

hey just so everyone knows: this post has over 1,000 notes and 2 people were jerks. 2.

[avpdpossum]

avpd brain: we must never be perceived. i will literally combust inside this skull if someone ever notices us in literally any situation. we must get SO good at being invisible

me: *gets good at being invisible to the point where people actually don’t seem to notice me or remember me a lot of the time*

avpd brain: oh :( guess we just suck :( guess we’re just so awful and unlikeable that we’re not worth anyone’s time :( if only someone would notice us like they notice everyone else :(

me: my brother in christ you wanted this!!!!!!!!

[rejectofsociety]

“Yes, mental illnesses can be stressful and cause issues in relationships with loved ones” and “no, mental illness does not make up a person’s entire personality nor does it make them inherently abusive or a bad person” are two statements that can and must coexist

[dankmemeuniversity]

[yearningheart]

anyone else perpetually feeling like they'll genuinely never find love LOL like not in a funny quirky way like truly......like im just not built for it im not the kind of person stuff like that happens to