'cause blogging is cheaper than therapy

sandy • married to joe • mama to twin toddlers (harper + connor) • dog collector • makeup junkie • occasional doodler

[d1rtypaws]

When someone is explaining something to you and you get hit with the realization that you haven’t retained anything that has been said to you and the moment they stop talking you won’t be able to recall any part of it

[ryankhudson]

BONUS

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

MY HEART

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

I’ve reached my final form

[kayvsworld]

Queer Eye Is A Very Good Show

[i-chew-on-pushpins]

please look at antoni’s face close up in all of these

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

Back when I was Harper and Connor’s age and my mom was my hair stylist

[babyanimalgifs]

[archivedbarfblog]

1-800-ARE-YOU-SLAPPIN

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

(Scene - parking at the mall. There is a car directly behind us, so Joe doesn’t have enough room to pull forward and then back into the space)

Joe: damnit, I hate parking head in.

Me: why?

Joe: it’s so much easier to leave if you back in

Me: but it’s more difficult when you arrive. It’s either easy now or easy later. One way or the other you have to back up.

....

Me: omg. Our parking preferences are our personalities in a nutshell. You’re all responsibility and delayed gratification and I’m all procrastination and instant gratification.

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

best friends 😍😍😍😍😍😍

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

My antidepressants are giving me migraines

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

Things I can officially do: watch tv in the bathtub like a lazy, amphibious queen 👑 🐸

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

I have to stop watching Nailed It because I’m suddenly overwhelmed by the desire to make horribly ugly but extremely enjoyable cakes

[mellifexfarm]

birds are so weird. what is this thing. what is he doing. please I want to swim in that pool

[thetyrannosaur]

fuck with me

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

My new favorite thing is reading Craigslist missed connections. There seem to be three categories of missed connections: kinda cute ones, really vague ones, and dudes stalking pregnant women. The vague ones are so pointless that they thoroughly delight me. These people took the time to reach out to a stranger online and then offered zero identifiable details- “saw you at the gas station and u were hella sexy. get at me”

ETA: Do me a favor. Go to your local missed connections and post the weirdest one in the comments. Let’s be best friends.

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

[wakemewhenimgorgeous]

My new favorite thing is reading Craigslist missed connections. There seem to be three categories of missed connections: kinda cute ones, really vague ones, and dudes stalking pregnant women. The vague ones are so pointless that they thoroughly delight me. These people took the time to reach out to a stranger online and then offered zero identifiable details- “saw you at the gas station and u were hella sexy. get at me”

ETA: Do me a favor. Go to your local missed connections and post the weirdest one in the comments. Let’s be best friends.

[traumaticchild]

when my parents get mad at me for traits they have