what? when? how?

observant dreamer ambitious assuming wanderer coward at times

[primordialsoundmeditation]

[mirrorless-chronicles]

We are all here, lost, trying to find our path in life.

[quotemadness]

Some people turn sad awfully young. No special reason, it seems, but they seem almost to be born that way. They bruise easier, tire faster, cry quicker, remember longer and, as I say, get sadder younger than anyone else in the world. I know, for I’m one of them.

Ray Bradbury

[wanderingthumbelina]

cringey posts... ugh.. people are always always disappointing.

[sulfur]

[wanderingthumbelina]

It’s pouring.. and my emotions are everywhere. 

This would be the last time that I will shed tears for you.

Goodbye.

[photografya-deactivated20230917]

[wanderingthumbelina]

When you want something so bad that you just deny it to yourself because it’s too painful too accept that it feels like you won’t ever have it. Ever.

[wanderingthumbelina]

[wanderingthumbelina]

Him

I don’t want to entertain the thought

I am trying my best not to think about him

I am trying to reason out why it is not possible

Why it should not happen.....

[wanderingthumbelina]

When suddenly you realized that you are dead scared of getting involved with someone again. When it gives you goose bumps just to think that someone might just drop you like a hot potato or if someone will hide things things from you. I don’t like the idea of me being a coward to get on with my life and meet new people and start a new relationship but everything is just too much.

[wanderingthumbelina]

So withdrawals came.. and like a baby I crawled back right under his skin.

But the want in me to love myself more is still in there.

I will keep on trying to have the guts to walk away and be the woman that I should be.

Confident.

Driven

Kind

and a fighter. 

A fighter that doesn’t intend to hurt anyone else. But a fighter to love thy self and be happy and contented on my won.

I will bring her back. 

[wanderingthumbelina]

I was a dead kid all weekend, actually until 15 mins ago. 

I watched this movie that tackled “Healing”. It is too early for me, I am still in the process of accepting and I might get some withdrawals and crawl back into a zombie like phase but I will get there... healing. 

I am so afraid of the future, being alone and fighting all my demons alone but hey, I still got myself. 

I just need to look for something to inspire me to be the better best version of me. 

And forget all the dreams and stories that I created inside my head with him. 

It’s time to love myself. And maybe just maybe, someone will come along and love me the way I should be love and hold onto me like there’s no tomorrow.

[wanderingthumbelina]

Untitled.

im feeling so lost... 

i want someone to atleast be there for me.

it’s a sad feeling to be needing for someone.

i hate myself.

[wanderingthumbelina]

Thoughts.

I’m able to log in..yay!

I fee so lost I feel so neglected. I’m barely hanging.. I am silently trying to reach out but I don’t know.. I don’t know what I want, what I really want. 

I want to burst into tears but I cannot look cray cray in front of my family, I am their only strength and hope. I cannot show weakness. But I totally feel so weak.

Now I’m thinking that I am tired and I just want to run to someone and let them take care of me. I just want to bury my face into their softness and warmth and forget the world.

But that’s next to impossible...

[thepersonalquotes]

[wingedhoney]

heavenly words

aliferous: (adj.) having wings

apricity: (n.) the warmth of the sun in the winter

aspectabund: (adj.) letting emotion show easily through the face or eyes

aurora: (n.) dawn

balter: (v.) to dance gracelessly, but with enjoyment

cafune: (n.) the act of running your fingers through the hair of someone you love

catharsis: (n.) release of emotional tension

charmolypi: (n.) a mixed feeling of happiness while being sad

diaphonous: (adj.) light, translucent, and delicate

dulcet: (adj.) sweet

ephemeral: (adj.) fleeting

ethereal: (adj.) extremely delicate and light in a way that seems too perfect for this world

eutony: (n.) the pleasantness of a word’s sound

halcyon: (adj.) a period of time in the past that was idyllically happy and peaceful

illecebrous: (adj.) enticing

irenic: (adj.) promoting peace

kalon: (n.) beauty that is more than skin-deep

kalopsia: (n.) the seeing of things as more beautiful than they actually are

lacuna: (n.) a blank or missing part

lilt: (n.) a pleasant gentle accent

ludic: (adj.) full of fun and high spirits

meraki: (n.) to do something with love or soul

nefelibata: (n.) cloud-walker; one who lives in the clouds of their own imagination

nepenthe: (n.) something that makes one forget their sadness

nubivagant: (adj.) wandering in the clouds

numinous: (adj.) feeling fearful yet awed and inspired

orphic: (adj.) beyond ordinary understanding

pyrrhic: (adj.) won at too great a cost

pulchritudinous: (adj.) breathtaking, heartbreaking beauty

scintilla: (n.) a tiny trace or spark of a feeling

selcouth: (adj.) unfamiliar, strange, yet marvelous

sirimiri: (n.) a light drizzle of rain

susurrus: (n.)  whispering, murmuring, or rustling

sweven: (n.) a dream

temerate: (v.) to break a bond or promise

viridity: (n.) innocence

yonderly: (adj.) absent-minded