🌺 Queued Blog

[toralei]

knowing all the details about drama but managing to avoid getting involed

[dethalbumll]

some days you’re just the squashed nutrigrain bar that exists at the bottom of every purse or bookbag

[sailorbrazil]

despite having an IQ of 1 i am still alive guys

[shermansky]

That scene in the shining where he breaks down the door but instead of jack nicholson its the doulingo owl

[opisayikes]

[alphacrone]

girls don’t like boys, girls like the pastoral escapist fantasy of living in a large house with many friends and several pets on a beautiful chunk of land with no financial, political, or medical anxieties. also, bread. 

[lizaleigh]

#this is 90% of the women I know Proven by the viral string of reblogs linking us to one another.

[sadhoc]

step 1: 

step 2: 

step 3:

step 4: 

[lilttlekingtrashmouth]

concept: fortune cookies but instead of fortunes you get vine references

[yourcalamity]

tumblr bitch: liking creepypasta makes you a freak!

me: **growls really hard**

jeff: its ok theyre just jealous babe…

me: i know jeff, i know

slendy: **slaps my fat juicy ass**

me: NOT NOW SLENDY JEFF AND I ARE HAVING A MOMENT

slendy: youre so boring **murders a whole family**

me: **sighs**

police: **en route**

jeff: **the killer**

[twinsfawn]

“spa-ghetti”

[ghoulfriendo]

troubled ghost hunters

[muddlemore]

ive been thinking about that noise bobby makes for like 2 days now what the fuck

[powerfulwizard]

he’s trying to have fun but he keeps taking poison damage

[warbiird]

@salad--tongs

[boethiah]

enough is enough. i’m going to weave a fucking tapestry 

[waspalisades]

thesis: the “song playing from another room” phenomenon appeals threefold to the millenial experience of nostalgia, isolation, and the sensation of eavesdropping on the lives of others via social media and hyper-consumption of culture actively building upon itself at a rapid pace

[spacedmar]

A concept: eating fresh fruit on a balcony in Greece during the golden hour with little or no clothing on, hair tied in a bun, wine in my glass, the beach close by

[durbikins]

[taquito]

wheres jake gyllenhaal

[earthdad]

in our hearts

[karl-steveo]

wish he was in my guts /:

[a-zzurra-deactivated20180518]

if you ever wanna be torn apart by a pack of rabid wolves then just say ‘i’ve never read harry potter’ and watch how many people turn to you frothing at the mouth with the full intent to murder. i was sitting in my uni class and i’m like ‘yah idk what you’re talking about i’ve never read the books’ and three (3) white girls’ heads swivelled on their necks at a full 360 degree rotation like some batshit owl but instead of coming from the hundred acre wood it’s a correctional facility. and they were ready to end me! then and there!!! after a deathly silence with the same constipated congestion and timeframe as a brontë novel i’m like ‘i’ve only seen the movies’ as if i thought that could redeem me, the heretic, the delilah, the Motherfucker ™, in the eyes of my fellow yeomen. and all 3 of them barked at the same time like i had just confessed to shitting on their mother’s greying corpse and depositing her directly into the atlantic instead of, ya know, not reading a bloody book series. so that’s my scarlet letter i guess