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On repeat @Noahdavis50

Dennis Rodman and Toni Braxton attend the MTV Video Music Awards afterparty in New York City on September 4, 1996.

‎CSR Racing 2 – This game redefines what you thought possible on your mobile device! “So real it hurts” – CULT OF MAC “Obliterates the line

re-0000

Georgia Palmer for Mortal Remains Collective

photography: Sarah Piantadosi

marvellegends

#america’s tiddies

ampervadasz

scarabesque

Waste their time.

official-lucifers-child

i’m gonna die laughing at this and i want it on my fucking gravestone

zkay47-deactivated20240227

cheshireinthemiddle

Since people don’t seem to understand what “Men’s Reproductive Rights” means,

I will explain it in a way using popular characters.

This is Nancy Hicks Gribble from popular animated show King of the Hill. One of the biggest controversies and stories about her is that throughout her marriage, she spent 14 years of it cheating on her husband , Dale Gribble

with muscle bound Native American masseur, John Redcorn.

During one of their frequent…encounters, Nancy becomes pregnant and has a son, Joseph Gribble.

Now obviously Joseph isn’t Dale’s biological son, but Dale is not smart enough and too trusting of his wife to question it (he has even caught them in bed together and incorrectly assumed his wife was just getting a massage). It is obvious to John Redcorn however. So what does this have to do with men’s rights? Well since Nancy kept the continued affair a secret, Dale has been taking care of Joseph, another man’s son, with the false assumption that it is his own. John Redcorn, who desperately wants to be a part of Joseph’s life, is unable to do so properly because the son believes that Dale is his father and Nancy refuses to be truthful. So one father is being tricked/forced to take care of a child that isn’t his, while another man is being refused his right to parenthood.

Need another example?

This is Lana Kane from the television show Archer.

Lana had a beautiful baby girl through artificial insemination.

However it came with some issues. She stole the sperm from soon-to-be father Sterling Archer

while he was having a cancer scare. Throughout the series, Archer has made it clear that he isn’t ready for a baby yet, so his stance on this would probably be clear. She then impregnated herself without telling him or getting his permission, got him to drown and then revive to save her because she was pregnant, then only after the baby was born, did she tell him it was his baby. Not soon after, she demanded that he “man up” and “take responsibility” for the care of the child, while she simultaneously refusing him any and all parental rights when he shows interest in the baby’s future, even stating that she would rather lose the baby than have Archer raise her. Comments on Archer’s wording of watching the baby as “babysitting” was met with similar responses as Lana’s of “It’s your baby, take responsibility” and “if you are the father, it is just parenting”. This all with him not getting a say in the baby’s creation and again, having no parental rights.

This is yet another problem that men face. At any time, a woman can either get pregnant through consensual intercourse and leave, steal a man’s sperm, or even rape him, and have complete decision on whether the child is born, and almost always gets custody of the child. At any time, the woman can come back into the man’s life and reveal that the man has a child (one that he didn’t ask for or plan for), and immediately demand the man pay back child support. The mother typically gets it. Men who would like to be a part of their baby’s life, no matter the cause of the pregnancy, can easily be refused that right due to court biases favoring women.

How about another?

This is Deborah Gallagher from the television show Shameless.

Deborah is pretty desperate for a relationship. blame it on teenage hormones, blame it on her family’s influence, but she makes some bad decisions because of it. Deborah befriended fellow high school student Derek Delgado.

They get into a relationship, and Deborah encourages him to have intercourse with her. When he brings up the need for a condom, she stresses that it isn’t needed because she is on the pill. It turns out that she lied about being on birth control pills, actually wanting to trap Derek into a relationship by getting pregnant and starting a family. Derek, shocked by the thought of having a baby, and concerned with the future that he had hoped for, moves out of the state to think and get away from Debby. Debby has also done something similar with a former boyfriend, Matt Baker, who she had originally lied to about her age and eventually raped while he was passed out drunk at a party. Her desperation for a relationship would have probably led to a similar scenario, if it wasn’t almost certain that Matt would have gone to jail for Statutory Rape (a different issue men face)

Derek’s story is actually similar to many men’s. He was clearly not ready for a baby, but was tricked into it. He had a whole life planned worked out, but the baby changed that drastically. The common response is “he should have thought about that before having sex”, which is not the same response a woman would normally get. Consent to sex is only consent to a baby for a man. Debby was ready for a baby, and he was not. But who cares about what he thinks, right? So now he must either halt or even cancel his life plans and dreams to take care of the baby, or leave the baby behind and deal with the guilt of his biological child growing up without him because he wasn’t ready.

You cannot keep shouting “my body, my decision” when it comes to a baby. A baby is more than 9 months. It is a life changing decision that could cost tens of thousands if not hundreds of thousands of dollars. It is a decision that takes years of dedication, potentially the rest of your life. Men should also get a choice and a say, but often don’t. not when they are raped, not when they are tricked, not when they are not ready for a baby, not when they have other plans in life, not when they want to be a part of the child’s life, nothing. That should be a problem. That should be considered an inequality.

cheshireinthemiddle

Bringing it back

jraker4

Men should not be tricked into fathering a child: obvious, true, and a statement nobody serious objects to.

Men should have some say over whether or not a woman endures 9 months of massive, potentially life-threatening work (at the least, suffering at the most) with their own bodies? Well, actually that has nothing at all to do with the first statement. Why, exactly, should a man be able to tell a woman ‘you have do this for nine months-you lose control over your own body for nearly a year.’

cheshireinthemiddle

“Men should not be tricked into fathering a child: obvious, true, and a statement nobody serious objects to.”

Incorrect. The united states government thinks men should be forced to care for children they were tricked into. Even when the man (or boy) was raped.

And since this has been around for about 27 years without much outrage as the blatant inequality that it is, it might be easy to conclude that most people (especially politicians and popular gender equality activist groups) don’t care about whether or not the man is forced into parenthood. It’s a real problem that most people either dont know about or dont care about and that’s why this post was made.

“Should a man have a say in whether a woman has to carry a baby-”

The post has nothing to do with pregnancy. It has to do with the choice of parenthood. If the woman wants to have a baby, she shouldn’t be able to make that decision for the man. She definitely shouldnt be able to rape or trick him and force him into parental responsibilities. Currently, she absolutely can. Not to mention that women typically dont want children, not for the pregnancy, but for the 2 decades of responsibility that comes with it. The money, the time, the sacrifice that 2 decades of putting another human being first demands. A huge lart of the abortion debate is that women should get to choose paremthood. That she should be able to focus on her career or education. That she might not be financially ready, or physically or emotionally ready. That she might not like the other parent or simply doesnt like children. And ALL of these also apply to men. We as a society just dont care.

I didnt say that if the man wants the baby and the woman doesnt, she should have to carry the baby (though for many, the pregnancy isnt why they dont want the baby. Which is why we have so many kids who go straight to adoption). I said that men should have the same legal option to opt out of parenthood that women currently have. And I have proven that they do not.

jraker4

So, a few things here. The law is lagging in a number of areas, I can’t disagree with that. That’s not quite the same thing as ‘the government thinks x’, but it’s still a significant injustice. I don’t know how much it *happens*, though, but there needs to be a significant overhaul in how the welfare of individual children (which is why the state intervenes) is guaranteed and protected.

As for the rest, if you can tell me how you manage to divorce pregnancy from parenthood, I’d love to hear about it. And if you can offer any numbers to substantiate why and for what intensity of reasons a given woman might not want children, I’d be interesting in hearing about that, too. I suspect pregnancy might at least be a strong runner up. To say nothing of how much more work women as a group do in child-rearing, regardless of problematic loopholes.

It’s also frankly ridiculous to suggest that we as a society don’t care about ensuring men have the ability to choose their own destinies, versus women. Are there problems? Absolutely. Should those problems be addressed? Also yes. But don’t completely lose your head over this, either. And also try to remember that pro-choice advocates didn’t arrive at this defensiveness of women’s rights because ‘fuck men!’, but because of a lot of ugly history.

cheshireinthemiddle

1. Im telling you that individual states have control over this. This isnt really any different than Roe v. Wade. It was a decision in a courtroom that set a standard. And since then, legally, malevictims of rape (or other methods of stealing sperm) can be sued for child support if the offender is pregnant. States have the power to overturn this (just like they have power to change gendered rape laws). They dont. And they have little to no pressure to because our society is convinced that men cannot and do not experience (systemstic) inequalities for being male.

2. I already did. I mean i could just mention (again) that adoption exists to destroy your whole attempt at an argument, but it would be better to explain more clearly. The assumption that women only take birth control pills or only have abortions to avoid the pain or inconveniences of pregnancy is glaringly false. Many, if not most women are more concerned with the 18+ years of parenthood over the 9 months of pregnancy. See, 18 years is about 2 decades. Two decades of responsibility. Two decades of putting another human being first. Two decades of investing arguably tens (if not hundreds) of thousands of dollars into someone else. Maybe she

Wants to focus on her career.

Wants to focus on her education.

Doesnt like the other potential parent.

Isnt emotionally ready for that committment.

Isnt financially ready for that committment.

Isnt physically ready for that committment.

Doesnt like kids and never wanted to raise one.

Has other things in her life she wants to do first.

None of these have to do with inconveniences of pregnancy and can easily exist outside of the pregnancy argument. Additionally, all of these perfectly acceptable reasons for a woman not to have a baby are also experienced by men.

Your comment about who “contributes” more in a relationship is also unfair. Even if the mother (or whichever parent) is at home with the child, the other parent (typically the father) is out working to provide for not only the baby, but also the mother. Plenty if people struggle to even take care of themselves financially. Men face gender roles of taking care of others. Men are also the vast majority of those who work overtime (more than women), work longer hours, stick with jobs they hate for more pay, take fewer vacations than women, etc. Sure, you may not be changing the baby’s diaper, but how offensive is it to hear that your 12 hour shift or 3 part time jobs to pay for that child’s expenses doesnt count as “contributing”? My dad had 3 jobs while my mom stayed at home and she (along with many others) commented on how she was doing “all of the work”. It’s a little offensive.

3. It is not ridiculous. It is considered progressive to side with women being able to opt out of parenthood for any reason (including reasons that have nothing to do with pregnancy). But men? Men who dont want to be parents are considered deadbeats. They are shamed (not just by conservative people either). And often forced to take responsibility for the decision the woman made for the both of them, rather than just for herself. As shown, men face this inequality at a legal level. And society (the government, activist groups, the average citizen, etc) hasnt shown that they consider this to be an issue worth addressing, or even recognizing. It is a sexist double standard, but one that no one cares about.

siryouarebeingmocked

Often the exact same people who say women should be able to opt out of motherhood say men shouldn’t be allowed to do the same.

kendallroy-deactivated20210425

this tweet is such a perfect encapsulation of what the brain trust on twitter considers activism at this point, i swear to god

she was a child

she was a child trapped in a legendarily abusive studio contract where she was being pumped full of drugs and sexually abused by producers

what is the point? “think about this the next time you watch the wizard of oz”? and do what? this tweet is so pointless

not for nothing but she was also a lifelong advocate of the civil rights movement and held a whole press conference to denounce white supremacist terrorism after the 16th street baptist church bombing

there are politicians who did blackface in office right now

judy garland has been dead for 50 slutty, slutty years

thehours2002

If you want to use this information to actually learn about minstrelsy I would recommend the chapter “Past Imperfect: Performance, Power, and Politics on the Minstrel Stage” from Digging the Africanist Presence in American Performance: Dance and Other Contexts by Brenda Dixon Gottschild. Gottschild covers the Africanist dance influence in minstrelsy, the re-appropriation of and resistance in minstrelsy by Black performers, the legacy of minstrelsy, and much more.

In a similar vein I would also recommend the Marlon Riggs documentaries Ethnic Notions, which covers anti-Black stereotypes in popular culture from the antebellum period through the Civil Rights movement, and Color Adjustment, which covers the representation of African Americans on television from its advent through the 1990s.

You’re not going to raise your consciousness by watching The Wizard of Oz and feeling bad that Judy Garland did blackface (in not just Everybody Sing, but also Babes in Arms and Babes on Broadway, for the record) because she was a minor under the thumb of her abusive stage mother and legally obligated to perform in these films because of her contract with MGM. Engage with the work of Black activists on the subject instead and think about or criticize how the stereotypes from minstrel performances still manifest in popular culture today in different forms.