ten perps

you have to really be committed

[welpmeout]

also related, on a "date" in less than two hours, but not really sure if it's happening because the person hasn't really been communicative about times! anyway it's not that bad, if i'm stood up i guess i can get ribs or something

also i'm kind of reflecting on the last three months of unemployment and how i have failed to make any friendships or personal connections in an industry that is completely built on friendships and personal connections~~~

i worry i'm neither as smart as i think i am, good as i think i am, or interesting as i think i am and there's a nagging feeling that's why everything attempt i have to achieve in life will fail 🍕

[welpmeout]

"i kinda like your company kind of but honestly the only reason i'm doing this is because i can't live off savings forever so i'm voluntarily shackling myself to a job i will probably hate for at most two years until i get enough money to quit and do my own thing again"

[werewolfmcwerewolf-deactivated2]

there have to be more jobs at hogwarts than just the ones we know about.  i’m just gonna invent one for remus to have before he becomes dada professor for this au i’m working on.  like research assistant to mcgonagall or smthg.  adjunct muggle studies prof.  dumbledore’s secretary.

[welpmeout]

Have him be the guy who negotiates buying carpet for Hogwarts or new chairs for the great hall. Bulk pumpkin juice and repainting the ceiling. Basically the job that he hates in every way but Dumbledore says he doesn’t want to fire Filch because his is the only blood that can unlock the Jewel Doors of Eternity

[werewolfmcwerewolf-deactivated2]

i know you’re joking but THIS IS A GOOD POINT.  filch is “caretaker” but does that involve all the stocking and purchasing supplies for the castle?  or do house elves take care of getting ingredients for meals, etc.?  (also, how does the division of labor between filch and the house elves work?  they both having cleaning duties…)  presumably hogwarts does have to purchase supplies, but on the other hand, they also have extensive grounds which hagrid cultivates so they maybe provide some food for themselves.  hmmm.  what is the economic scheme of hogwarts. i have questions.

[welpmeout]

I'm only like 50% joking! Like what does Filch do? He disciplines students only occasionally (like I think house heads determine what people do for detention, and occasionally I guess they're like "oh, you've been awful, go to Filch, he actively hates students) and I guess he cleans up things that are broken (versus tidying up which is what the house elves do, I guess), but he actively antagonizes troublemakers and probably makes things much worse in the end.

I definitely don't really remember the books in detail but I guess he enforces curfew (less out of any desire to uphold the rules and more out of spite, as well as the fact that due to said spite he probably makes sure he calls in a rival house head when he catches a student so they lose points due to the Joking-Not-Joking-Actually-Deadly-Serious system of the house tournament)

anyway this is to say the position is almost certainly a position that Dumbledore invented as a favor to a friend, and one that Filch actively resents since he (rightfully) sees it as a position of pity

so Sirius could be also afforded a position of friendship, plunging him into an intense rivalry between a dude who upholds the rules out of a chance to punish students and a dude who could not care less about rules but feels like he should because it's probably part of his job maybe?

but Hogwarts is loaded with rare and magical stuff. there's materials to make Felix Felicitus, Veritaserum, and Polyjuice Potion which is like, pretty serious stuff! also crazy deadly plants and whatever (how there is not a stack of corpses of 11 year olds shoulder high outside the greenhouse i do not know, they are dumbasses and do things on dumbass dares)

aside from mundane things (like mentioned, pumpkin juice for the feasts, hiring magical painters so the paintings can feast as well) it's not totally out of the question to imagine him just on trips to top off supplies of stuff that probably end up much more dangerous than anyone really realizes, since it's a job that puts him on a schedule that closely mirrors Harry's and that's pretty sweet as far as a doting dad goes.

[werewolfmcwerewolf-deactivated2]

there have to be more jobs at hogwarts than just the ones we know about.  i’m just gonna invent one for remus to have before he becomes dada professor for this au i’m working on.  like research assistant to mcgonagall or smthg.  adjunct muggle studies prof.  dumbledore’s secretary.

[welpmeout]

Have him be the guy who negotiates buying carpet for Hogwarts or new chairs for the great hall. Bulk pumpkin juice and repainting the ceiling. Basically the job that he hates in every way but Dumbledore says he doesn't want to fire Filch because his is the only blood that can unlock the Jewel Doors of Eternity

[welpmeout]

werewolfmcwerewolf fixed your avatar for you

i couldn’t figure out what to put on the mug so so it’s empty for now

[werewolfmcwerewolf-deactivated2]

oh my god albert you are ridiculous

the mug should probably say like idk “bite me” or something don’t u think.  ironic hipster werewolf mugs.  hella cool.

[welpmeout]

ur wish is my command

[welpmeout]

werewolfmcwerewolf fixed your avatar for you

i couldn't figure out what to put on the mug so so it's empty for now

[tchotchkenation]

Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie just won a Hugo, which I’m thrilled about! It’s an excellent book that fans of sci-fi should definitely read. Here’s the two sentence plug before I blabber about it at length :

Ancillary Justice is about an AI on a quest for revenge with a haughty time-lost noble in tow. Even against the backdrop of a conspiracy to Kill The Ruler Of The Galaxy, Leckie manages to focus the narrative on interesting and driven characters set in a fully realized, breathing, changing, world.

It’s times like I wish I could write better because I honestly think Ancillary Justice was my favorite book this year (even though it came out October 2013). and I want to convince y’all to read it. More fleshed out thoughts under the read more!

Read More

[welpmeout]

I wrote some words about Ancillary Justice, my favorite book so far this year!

[tchotchkenation]

antinous_wild is a cool person and fun enabler

also disasteroid design philosophy laid bare to the world

[welpmeout]

getintherobot didn't realize you had a twitter! i'm following you now!

[welpmeout]

hello again garbage website

e: I appreciate how the computer looks unimpressed and the confetti seems half-hearted

[satan-o-matic-blog]

[welpmeout]

Yue Minjun in his studio, Beijing, May 2007 by Jonathan Becker

[marginalutilite]

I’ve started to read Ready Player One and I’m deeply disappointed. It’s the shallowest nerd wish fulfillment fantasy ever, complete with a Bill Gates-esque hero-god. Basically, Richard Dawkins Writes Sci Fi. I thought it was one of the acknowledged…

[marginalutilite]

Sorry, I didn’t realize that was a tumblr faux pas. Sincerely. You’d think I’d have caught on to the rules by now, right? Anyway, I’m still reading—maybe 25% in—bc the world building is compelling and believable, so I might change my mind. It’s odd that virtual reality never really caught on widely, given how popular a prediction for the future it was in speculative lit. Second Life and such aside.

[catsuitmonarchy]

While tagging your hate is a faux pas I do think that person could have maybe been less awful about it? Like their post and tags just kept swearing at you.

[monkeysmeanbusiness]

Nope, it’s still a terrible book. 

[welpmeout]

Ready Player One is a garbage book that's both blithely racist and transphobic. Not only that, it makes the mistake of conflating 80's geek nostalgia with things such as "settings", "plots", or "characters". Friggin' Harry Potter's wizard chess scene from the first book has more 80's geek nostalgia than the entire book put together.

You would think a book that bills itself as National Treasure, But For Nerds would have some interesting puzzles to solve, artifacts to lift out of a trapped plinth, enigmatic riddle guardians to fool, etc. NOPE. The 'puzzles' in the book consists of rote repetition and memorization of pop culture instead of something that could conceivably require 'logical thought' or 'lateral thinking' . Here's what lateral thinking is in the book : being able to say every line of a 2 hour movie word for word.

the entire book is techno-libertarian "geeks are the REAL ubermensch" wankery that other authors like Cory Doctorow loves and i cannot believe that it's as popular as it is.

[welpmeout]

treesahquiche replied to your photo “i fucked up”

Ooooh were you making steamed eggs, custard, or...?

Custard! Making it for a friend who's just came back to America. I was lifting the ramekins out of the hot water bath with potholders and slipped. Much sadness all around.

[welpmeout]

i fucked up

[bildungsromantics-blog]

i’ve had multiple dudes on okcupid ask me what my “heritage” is, and it’s like, are they literal white supremacists, are they trying to make sure all my percentages of white european are in accordance with their preferences, or … what?

[welpmeout]

the most benign interpretation i can think of is that they're just like "is she irish?"

like i know a lot of white people use the term "heritage" in the lens of "i am half irish quarter swedish quarter danish" as opposed to stuff like blackness in which case the term "race" is used.

probably just seen as a low-effort ice breaker. "i'm nine tenths german!" and then you can talk about how you've never been to germany or something

[welpmeout]

is there anything as petty as being annoyed at a person's twitter whose relatively innocuous tweets keeps getting retweeted by other people you follow

probably not

(said person said some dumb stuff about cultural appropriation, along the lines of "OH SO I CAN'T EAT SUSHI NOW" so i was like "i can just unfollow this person and not make a fuss". he keeps popping up though what a burden i have to bear)

[welpmeout]

lost of whining and stuff below the readmore! just venting a bit

i think there was a period of about half a year after i graduated when i learned to dress myself and i was like “maybe, in theory, i’m in the ‘prime of my life’ and i don’t look weird”

now i’m like “well, maybe my serial lack of anything dating-wise, online or off, is because i’ve always looked weird and awkward”

which is ridiculous, but maybe it’s not ridiculous? like “”objectively”” i’ve been on a dating site for two years with literally one person clicking into my profile per week through multiple different profile pictures. like, that’s not really ‘things crappy for now’ when it’s sustained. maybe that’s the universe sending me a sign

there’s people who are like ‘everyone’s attractive to someone' which always seems to me to be like 'so maybe you're not trying hard enough? you fucking weirdo? loser idiot?'

the last time i honest to god started freaking out was in taiwan when my mom and my brother were buying me clothes and they were like “no, that’s too tight” “…that’s too tight too”, and then at their suggestion i ended up with an XL shirt that was just huge and baggy and i was like “oh my god, what if i’ve been making a terrible mistake with shirts that touch my body at points other than my shoulders”

like i felt like i was so full of myself, pretending my body exists for any reason other than to keep my head ~5 feet off the ground, and that everyone was like “get a load of this guy, trying to look good. nothing will help you look good guy.”

ANYWAY so i’ll probably go back on okcupid after i convince myself that, i dunno, it’s ley lines or w/e

[welpmeout]

two american wizards during the events of the 7th book

wizard 1: oh hey did you hear that there's an advisory for muggleborns travelling to europe.

wizard 2: yeah! saw that. vold mortay is back? or something? is that his name? from the last time?

wizard 1: something like that.

wizard 2: that's fucked up

wizard 1: yeah

wizard 1 sips coffee

wizard 2: did you catch that quidditch game yesterday?