SLOW ARROW.

— a slow arrow breaks in the sad wolf's jaws.

[mournflame]

Ugh I keep fighting it, but I have to face the music that I am just not as motivated to dig into DA lore as I used to be. I still enjoy DA. I could even still write the characters I have from this setting. But, I am just not deriving the joy I used to from digging into codices, etc. and writing sweeping metas. That is integral to my enjoyment of rping a character. I just feel so blech about a blog if I'm not motivated to ramble about nonsense re: them at all hours.

So I'm going to formally close down my DA blogs. I'll still make DA verses on other blogs, and I still very much want to write with all of you. In fact, I think y'all're pretty much all following me elsewhere anyway. If this changes in the future, y'all'll be the first to know, but for now, DA will no longer be my primary rpc.

[weptlore]

Hmmmm that question is also making me consider what contingencies Felassan had in place in case things didn't go to plan. Because he WOULD have contingencies. Solas is the one who says "this is our best chance" and banks on it. Felassan is the one who says "yeah well if it all goes to shit I'll just have these seven back-ups tucked up my sleeve".

[weptlore]

a Question for science: say Solas had died at the ritual site rather than been imprisoned. How would Felassan take that?

He would not take it well, I can tell you that much. It goes beyond his deep, ancient, complex love for Solas — though that is certainly a factor. But, you have to understand Solas is the only one who really has such a deep understanding of the Veil. He's also the only one who both can and will bring down the Veil with the highest rate of success in damage control. And, Felassan considers that of paramount importance for the good of the world. Solas isn't the only option, but he is, from Fel's perspective, the best option. Fel has also fallen into seeing Solas as his last hope. If they can't accomplish this now, Fel has to accept it won't happen in his lifetime. His lifetime is considerable, too, which means if it hasn't happened in those many thousands years then it's not likely to happen at all.

So you have to understand that he's not just grieving the loss of someone he loves like his own soul. He is grieving the loss of the world. He is grieving the consequences that have played out, that are currently playing out, and that will play out in the future. Unfortunately for Rook, this also frees Fel. With Solas alive, Fel chooses to play a longer and subtler game so Solas can ultimately be in a position to finish what they started. This leads to Fel getting nerfed which further limits his options.

With Solas dead? All bets are off. Fel doesn't have to be careful. He can just kill Rook while they're at their most vulnerable, before the Veilguard has truly formed, and take the dagger. The problem then becomes slaying the Evanuris, but if Rook can do that with virtually nothing at their disposal, Felassan (who has people / resources to call on right out the gate) can also do it. Really it's not the Evanuris you have to worry about most in this scenario. It's him. He WILL be consuming the Fragmythal. He WILL be bringing the Veil down. It will probably kill him in the process. But, you don't have the advantage over him that the narrative gives you over Solas.

[weptlore]

In the same vein as the Anchor question, is there any particular action or choice Emithas could make that would cause Felassan to leave? If no, is it out of a sense of commitment or simply "he would never"?

Ooooo . . . This depends on time period. For the overwhelming majority of the time Felassan and Emithas have known each other, Felassan was someone who would choose the world / greater good over everything else. Everyone else. This begins to get complicated in a post-Veil world. Especially after TME and DA:I (with Alanari as Inquisitor). He still has an instinct toward a greater good, but he is finally, after thousands of years, so worn down by everything that he will make a few selfish choices. I'm trying to think of something that seems IC for Emithas that Felassan would unequivocally oppose, and I got nothin'. So let's just say that there's always something Felassan will consider more important than his relationship with an individual, no matter how he cherishes that relationship, but Emithas is so unlikely to put Fel in that position that I can't even think of an example.

[weptlore]

So Fel was put in the terrible position of being held up as the poster child for newborn elves. By someone who’d enslaved him, no less, and an empire he hated. Yet, here he was being touted as example that all have a place within the empire, these newborns are people, we should embrace them as the future, they are proof this existence of ours is new but not worse, and so on. And, it’s an unbearable weight to be the examplar for an entire group of people like that and to know that, however you behave, it affects so many others. It’s another sort of leash, worse than the vallaslin. Which gets into a discussion of what his early days in Elvhenan were like. Reader: they were not good but they were not simple either.

I'm looking for something else in my hc tag and of course found this again. Yeah . . . those early days under Mythal's yoke, he was so much a shadow of himself. He wasn't yet the man we know. That took a lot of time and hard experience. At this point? He was reeling. He was traumatized and grieving. He was utterly alone away from everything and everyone he'd ever known without confirmation that anyone survived / that his sacrifice mattered. He was drowning under a name, a role, an identity that was not his own. This alien culture that had taken him had defined those things for him when they were supposed to develop naturally and be self-determined. He was thrust into this public position like a curio on display while simultaneously being burdened with the weight that how he behaved reflected on anyone like him: not just Leth but all the first elves to be naturally born. And, the burdens and abuses continued to pile over time. Quite frankly, he was shattered at this time. He was barely keeping his head above water, trying to do the most good from his position, before understanding he would never be able to do the good he wanted in said position. But, realizing that was worse because it's not as if he could just change his circumstances on a whim. It took strength and courage and sacrifice to free himself, and it took even more to help others do the same.

[weptlore]

Does Felassan snore, and do certain things trigger it?

He does not snore but by god do you wish he would. He is eerily still and quiet when he sleeps. You would truly think he's dead. Part of this is because he's a Somniari, so when he dreams, his soul is in a sense walking elsewhere from his body. But, he sleeps like even when he's not Fade-walking lmao It's just one of his quirks.

[weptlore]

fellas is it gay to sleep with your not-husband while the world teeters on disaster only to lose him afterward

Felassan: I sure hope so

[weptlore]

Do you think Felassan ever suspected Celene was responsible for the murders of her servants before she herself admitted it?

I'm not sure he jumped to that conclusion when he first met Briala. I don't think he had a good grasp of the Orlesian political landscape at the time or the context surrounding that event. As he gained more context from Briala over the four years before she returned to Celene, though, I think he found the event suspicious. There were details that just didn't add up. Not enough to substantiate anything but enough that it stood out to someone with his particular life experience. It's a suspicion that would only grow over the years — but bringing it up without any proof, let alone a confession from Celene, would only create a rift between Briala and him. He could very well be wrong, after all. Wouldn't that be nice? Unlikely but nice.

[weptlore]

The Fen'Harel moniker really is just so 🤌 Without even getting into the probable importance of names in Elvhenan, this is a name Solas used well before his rebellion. One that was established probably even before the empire properly formed and thus was, in its way, a foundation of the empire itself. Certainly it was a foundation of Mythal and her inner circle. She was his second and close friend. So you can see why he would want to shed it when he rebelled. It would always be associated with her, with court life, with the empire, with his own many wrongs committed in the name of what was at the time a good cause. But, you can also see why Felassan was adamant he should keep it — and also why Felassan put so much work into reshaping it, despite Solas' protests. There's power in a foundation of the empire turning against that empire. There's power in the awe and respect and fear already baked into it. They just need to shape it in a new direction, turning it from a tale that glorifies the Evanuris to one that edifies the People.

[weptlore]

Ugh Flint trying to assemble a captain’s counsel for Nassau and the captains actually looking at Silver and only really listening when he backs Flint up

EDIT: And then Flint having his own “you heard him” moment in the same scene, I am SCREAMING INTO MY HANDS

[weptlore]

I would’ve gone all of Black Sails thinking no character was a good direct parallel to Fel, there’s just bits of him in several characters, but late s3 / s4 Silver is out to prove me wrong

[weptlore]

All that having been said, I do love Silver being the "king" in Billy's little narrative when reading the scene for Fel from different angles because I can absolutely see how some would throw more weight behind him than Solas, see him as some alternative, and begin to tell a story where he IS that alternative as if telling the story will make it true. And, perhaps it would. The power of stories is as apparent in Fel / Solas' lives as it is in Silver's / Flint's.

[weptlore]

Doesn't matter what's true. Not now, at any rate. We're creating the appearance of a man out of nothing. The appearance of a man that the resistance against the English feels compelled to rally around. We'll introduce him. We'll put flesh on him. We'll give him a soul. But if the street wants to invest him with more than we can on our own, I won't fight them about it. But that name isn't doing anything for us. We'll have to see about that.

Fel shaping the way Fen'Harel's legend forms

You want to put a man forward as the face of our efforts to oust the English from the island, why not use Flint? They all know him already. They all fear him already. I've lived too long dependent upon Flint to be the one to hold our ranks together. It's time we finally had an alternative.

Fel's own legend being shaped beyond his control, when the narrator becomes a character

When we're ready, when he's ready, he'll step into the role we've created for him, and lead an impossible army into an unwinnable war . . . and win it.

More shit Fel would write

[weptlore]

You suffer with me, this is the bargain you unwittingly entered when we became mutuals all those years ago

[weptlore]

Let us say there is some merit to your argument. Let us say that Mr. Dobbs will do as you ask of him. I would have to admit in that case that the world has shifted beneath our feet in a most startling way. But in terms of our future and the danger that you believe you may pose to me, bear this in mind: I have survived starvation, a tempest, pirate hunters, jealous captains, mutinous crews, angry lords, a queen, a king, and the goddamn British navy. So to whatever extent you may be concerned that some day we will clash — worried that, though today we be friends, some day you will have no choice but to be my end — I wouldn't worry too much.

[SIGHS ONCE AGAIN]

[weptlore]

If you had disciplined him, he would resent you for it, but towards me, I don't believe he feels resentment. I believe he feels shame for having disappointed me and a great need to redeem himself in my eyes.

[sighs in "this is definitely a conversation Fel and Solas have had"]

[weptlore]

I once thought that, to lead men in this world, to be liked was just as good as feared — and that may very well be true — but to be both liked and feared all at once is an entirely different state of being in which I believe, in this moment, I exist alone. The men need to know they're in good favor with me. They need it, and there is nothing they won't do to make sure they have it.

[sighs louder]

[weptlore]

If you had disciplined him, he would resent you for it, but towards me, I don't believe he feels resentment. I believe he feels shame for having disappointed me and a great need to redeem himself in my eyes.

[sighs in "this is definitely a conversation Fel and Solas have had"]