僕の存在の意味をくれて

screaming, feed me here, fill me up again; temporarily pacify this hungering. independent fandomless oc.

[wexver-archive-blog]

>> temporiize:

Going along with the motions simply for propriety’s sake has never been their kind of thing; if anything, it took more effort to go along with than not. Instead, when they respond ─ “Same here!” ─ it’s more of an appreciation of his presence and the fact that they had someone to test their ‘skills’ on rather than their meeting itself. Introductions were fleeting and common, something everyone on the planet was capable of ─ did each have to be stamped with pleasantries simply from a few exchanged words?

“’General’ is good! Could give you direction, or motivation, or something like that.” Thankfully, it’s the easiest, a test of memorization; remember what the cards mean and then piece it all together. Anything else would require a selection of even more cards and patterns and, quite frankly, things they hadn’t quite looked into yet. 

With a hum, they turn the chosen cards. Star, Emperor, Sun, huh?

“These cards’re all positive. You had some kinda good idea at some point, went with it, and now you’re being encouraged to keep doing whatever that idea lead you to, especially since this last card guarantees that it’ll all turn out perfectly!”

A blink, and another -- and then, they give a weird laugh, a grin cracking to one side of their lips. Something slips up into their thoughts, a puff of haze that brings surprising clarity; they know, without reason or need for it, that a reading so wholly positive is wrong, and yet that only serves to amuse them.

               "Sorry, sorry -- it’s a nice reading, not bad at all,” they hum, leaning back in thought; “Even though it’s wrong.” ( How could a mere random draw of cards really say anything about a future which seems so clearly to be a void?  Dumb of them to hope, but it seems they forgot just how much so for a moment – and surely they will soon forget again. ) Even though their tone falls dark, they still speak lightly as they smile, pulling out their wallet from a pocket to pay regardless of their harsh judgement.  It’s not like they’re without their honor – they were curious, and their curiosity was answered, even if the answer came in the negative.

               “Oh, but don’t worry, dear -- you answered my question, after all.  It can’t be helped that you’re dealing with an odd case.”

[thwpped-blog]

contoswrites:

also if you’re cool with pre-established relationships/dynamics where we skip all the awkwardness of starting to roleplay with someone new and jump straight to plotting a little and tagging each other in stuff hmu

[wexver-archive-blog]

[wexver-archive-blog]

cryptian:

「  @wexver  」

「 ✞ 」 “I wonder if there are people that would try to call us friends, especially ‘cause incessant verbal abuse seems to have become a common marker for such things. Still, I’m pretty sure friends have some fondness in what they say, and I’m pretty sure neither of us do.” Eli hummed as he spoke aloud to no one. “Humans are stupid though, so I’m sure anyone would just laugh and roll their eyes at the logical and obvious statement that neither of us actually care for each other. I’m sure she’d drop kick me into next week if she didn’t find me useful.”

                 A talkative stranger and good ears could only mix one way: Braid unconsciously found themself listening to whatever the man was chatting on about.  Relationship problems, maybe?  Hm, no, he had particularly used the word “friends” -- well, curiosity ran far too deep in their veins, perhaps.  “It sounds rough,” they hummed, interrupting casually as they tilted their upper body sidelong toward the man, their brows high in interest and invitation to continue.  “Though I wonder -- humans can be apt to ignorance, but some can be quite observant, too.”  Somehow, they didn’t seem to be lumping themself in with “humans” -- so what did they mean to say?  They weren’t so sure, either.

[wexver-archive-blog]

temporiize:

“Braid, huh?” It’s after hearing the name that their memory malfunctions on them in a way they didn’t ask for; the visuals are there for sure, of a hospital they were far too acquainted with and of the others trapped within its walls, but the details of such stay as simple images. Names? Not coming up so well, it seemed. Maybe that really was it ─ or, it could’ve been as simple as a name change for all they knew. Thinking about it now, though, seemed like a lot of complicated roadwork that they didn’t feel like taking up just yet. 

Perhaps, maybe, that was exhausted their already too little ‘think before you speak’ reserves. 

“Ahrin.” Approximately two ticks after the instinctive answer, they realize that maybe they shouldn’t have used their actual name if they were suspicious of already knowing the person. Whoops… well, it’s not like I can take it back now. 

“Anywho, I should get to it, huh?” With a quick grab of the deck, they practically dump the cards on the table, making sure they’re all face down. “Pick three! ─ oh, and it’ll be ten fifty, but we can settle that later.”

               “Ahrin,” they repeat as well, ensuring the name’s pronunciation and testing its taste; isn’t it familiar?  Familiar, companion-like, not worn-out and overstated; they like the feel of it on their tongue, they think, in a half-bitterly amused sort of way.  “It’s nice to meet you,” they say more in politeness than anything else, a certain falsity about it; it’s the automatic utterance for the situation, something they always only halfway mean ( because meeting people is always nice, but must every meeting not feel like a first? ).

               Their focus shifts to the cards, a spindly hand coming to rest on the edge of the table; pick three, huh?  "I see,” they giggle lightly; so in the end, it comes down to their mysterious luck just what the future will read?  In that case, maybe it really could be revealing...

               "Oh, should I ask the cards what I’d like to know?  But really, what I’m most interested in is quite general...”  Without much thought, they let their fingers drift over three of the cards and turn their eyes back up to Ahrin.  “So I suppose my future ‘in general’ is fine.  I’m interested to see what they say~”

[wexver-archive-blog]

temporiize:

“Hmm…” No thought’s truly being put into that hum of theirs, but they take a few moments to let it fill the air as if there were, regardless. The truth was that they’d made up their mind the moment the lack of preference had been established ─ the further truth was that they had at least put an amount of research into tarot reading rather than the brief video-watching they’d done with the other mediums. “Cards it’ll be, then!”

Naturally, the setup part of it all would come after the decision, yet instead there was a brief pause of silence, shortly followed by a few blinks of what could only be noted as realization. A flash of familiarity, one that’d apparently gone right over their head at first in light of their soon-to-be-had fun, causes a break in their one track mindset: “Ah, wait, you’re─”

No, no! Abort that! 

“…name! Your name ─ I didn’t get it?” It’s a sloppy patch up of a mistake they’d nearly made, but if nothing else, Ahrin seemed to be satisfied with their own cover, giving themself a mental fist pump in relief. Whether or not they remembered him, there’d be no way for him to remember them ─ not as they were now, at least.

               Their eyes expectantly follow the would-be fortune-teller as they seem to think, only to pause in time with them; there’s something about that look that Braid can’t help but take note of, as well.  For a moment they blink at one another; their mind is immediately set to deciphering what the other is thinking, looking at them as though they’ve just noticed something -- what?

               “--’I’m’?” they wonder back, softly, only to be questioned in return ( but was that really the question they wanted answered? ).  “Oh -- It’s Braid,” they offer as though they aren’t particularly attached to that response, somehow, mentally scattered for a moment as they try to puzzle together whatever the real question might have been ( but they can’t figure it out; they’re missing some of the pieces, it feels like ).

               “---What’s yours?” as if it occurred to them half a second late they ask, gaze coming back into focus on the stranger.  ( But hasn’t that “been there done that” feeling of theirs changed colors, at least a  hue or two, into something more comfortable?  Perhaps that’s why they’re struggling to let this go. )

[wexver-archive-blog]

temporiize:

For a moment, they were worried they’d have to become closely acquainted with how to convince a customer right off the bat; almost immediately were words forming on their tongue, prepared to do just that, only to throw it all aside as the situation turned to their favor. 

Now, instead, there was another obstacle they had to face ─ though wasn’t it a blessing that this one had no idea what was involved? That just made things easier to accomplish? A lack of knowledge opened up a book of opportunities for them, giving them plenty of routes to choose from! They wouldn’t be able to deny that they preferred this kind of thing over someone who knew something about what they were getting into.

“Well, cards are the usual, but palm reading is just as good! Do you wanna choose yourself?”

               Of course, there would be multiple methods -- they know of a few, though not to excruciating detail they would admit.  They’ve seen it in books before, and it always holds water in fantasy, but even if their life may seem to be a carefully-woven ( ha! ) story, it is not fiction; though they are CURIOUS, they are not nearly so foolish as they seem.  And yet, a natural propensity to seem however suits their company is taking shape -- if this stranger is responding to cluelessness, then CLUELESS they shall appear for at least a bit longer.

               “I see.  Well, if you prefer cards, that suits me as well --  I can’t say I’m particular.”  That much is the truth -- they are OBSERVING the other in their element, cool blue eyes following their mannerisms as subtly as they may manage, and following along to this stranger’s preference will tell them far more than making a demand themselves will.  “I’m sure you’ll do a better job with your preferred medium, after all.”  ( And if, by that strange and silent wish of theirs, this person could truly tell them of their fate, they would far rather it be clear than at all muddled. )

[culturenlifestyle]

Delicate Embroidered Portraits Inspired By Paintings By Lisa Smirnova

Russian artist Lisa Smirnova pairs the art of embroidery with drawings. Hand-crafting colourful thread into a cloth canvas to resemble famous depictions of Frida Kahlo and Charles Bukowski, the artist also knits paintings of lesser known yet beautiful subjects such as tattooed men, rabbits and a pulsating heart beating in the middle of a floral bloom.

Keep reading

[wexver-archive-blog]

temporiize:

“Of course I can!” There’s the slightest hint of indignation in that upbeat tone despite the understandable disbelief. Notably, they probably wouldn’t believe someone claiming the same thing had they been on the other side, but hey ─ it’s different, even if they really were one without all the fancy advertised ‘powers’ that the pros tend to have (see also: experience, actual knowledge, and the like). “I wouldn’t advertise it if I didn’t know what I were doing!”

Yes. Yes they would, clearly.

               “Hmm.”  Well, they’re certainly sure of themself, even in the face of Braid’s skepticism; it’s amusing, if nothing else, and that enthusiasm is enough excuse for them to indulge their curiosity ( not that they need much of one ).  They stand nothing to lose, particularly, do they?  ( Other than a small fee, they’re certain, but when have they ever concerned themselves too much with such things in the face of something interesting? )  With a thought like that, a grin crosses their lips and they tilt their head at the would-be fortune teller.

                “Well, I suppose you have my attention~  Do you need a crystal ball or some such?  Or do you need to see my palm?  I really haven’t a clue how this would work.”  ( Questioning, questioning -- if by some miracle this did work, just how would it go? )

[wexver-archive-blog]

@temporiize

                “Fortune-telling?”  Braid’s not sure they believe in such a thing ( truly, could anyone but them know their own fate? ), but as if stricken by optimism they find themself CURIOUS.  “Can you really do something like that?” they wonder, putting aside their ( probably healthy ) skepticism for just a moment.

[temporiize-blog]

            I can do anything, anything, ANYTHING I want ─

                                                                        It’s golden now ─

                                                                                                        why would I slow down?

[wexver-archive-blog]

                                                                                                      this ringing in my head—                                                                                   is this a cure, or is this a disease?

                                                   independent fandomless oc.                                                           ( written by cdra. )

[wexver-archive-blog]

               Taking notes in a real book is far more satisfying than doing so on a phone – thinking something like that, they’re simply sitting outside a cafe, jotting things down as they watch the strangers go by, a cup of coffee still steaming lightly beside them.

[artsnquotes]

I think I’m greedy, but I’m not greedy for money - I think that can be a burden - I’m greedy for an exciting life.

David Hockney (via wnq-art)

[wordsnquotes]

People that like to read are always a little f*cked up.

Pat Conroy, The Prince of Tides 

[wexver-archive-blog]

               Taking notes in a real book is far more satisfying than doing so on a phone -- thinking something like that, they’re simply sitting outside a cafe, jotting things down as they watch the strangers go by, a cup of coffee still steaming lightly beside them.

[wexver-archive-blog]

            It’s cheap candy day.  Hence, this asshole is going to make themself sick off of chalky hearts and chocolate.  God bless America.