I just watched Zoolander for the first time and during the whole experience it just felt like I was watching the movie adaptation of "A Court of Thorns and Roses". The movie matches the story almost exactly, even down to the constructing a superfluous institution for children rather than supporting those who are actually subject to the systems that are harmful.
The balcony to the mansion’s main suite is open, filling the room with a lulling cool breeze as the last of the sun’s setting rays turn the scene from a gold hue to blue. Propped up on the pillows of our bed, the High Lord to the Spring Court, lips pressed to my head in a permanent kiss, draws circles over my shoulder with his thumb while his other hand applies pressure to my belly, lulling me to sleep. His deep and steady breathing is cradling me between the cool air of the room and his warm embrace.
My instinct is to face upwards to him and climb the way up his neck with kisses until I meet his adoring face, but I’m all but unconscious now. I know he will stare at me in his embrace long after I’ve drifted off. Only for me to rouse first the next day and have my share of gawking and memorizing my partner’s sleeping form, resisting the urge to try to find a way to burrow myself under his skin.
I’m falling freely into the serenity of sleep when the sudden light brush of my hip by the beds of his fingers dragging up sends lightning through me, piercing my body to him with need for more. Before I can inhabit my body, a moan of pleasure escapes, and I know my fate.
At the crease of my lower back, he’s perched himself, holding me now on my side. He breaths in the scent of my neck and moans with need. His teeth sliding over me, my body lay decadent in his hands that are splaying themselves over my breasts, back pressed to him. He plays all of my strings, and now greed is burning inside me as I can’t help but grind myself along him. My openings blooming for his presence.
He moans my name, “I’m so sorry. I know you were close to sleep.” He says, lifting my arm to find my breast. He buries his face, embracing me, licking and biting as I succumb to the pleasure. His hand finds its way to the bottom of my entrance and slides up and down in the wetness of my labia. He plays with the wall at the bottom of my vagina before he inserts his thumb and grips me. Holding me tighter, he kisses me and pulls back, and I swear he wants to eat me. Two fingers inside and his thumb at my clit, he bites my nipple to the perfect point of pain. “I love you,” he says into my ear as I start to twitch around him. His tongue finds my sensitive clit and gently strokes while one hand is curling inside me and the thumb of the other slides into my ass. I arch into him, and he hoists my legs over his shoulders. When my release comes, he meets it, greedy, diving deeper into me as I shake around him.
He licks it all, burying his nose in it and painting his face. He rests his head on the crevice of my thigh and sighs as though he has met heaven until he flips me over, folds my pliant body, and plants his face into my ass inhaling deep. At this I rouse to alertness and arch into his caressing tongue. I shake my ass into his face, and he lets out a growl and a moan, catching my legs in an arm and sitting himself on the bed. My ass presented to him his tongue licks and enters.
When I can no longer take it, I rest my weight on him, pushing his back to the mattress, sitting on his face. I squirm at his tongue as I reach forward, taking him in my hands and lick up along his length from base to tip. His nails bury into my hips when I place my lips around his tip and suck. It’s so smooth. I swirl my tongue and drool from my bottom lip to add to the liquid of his precum and begin sucking him deep. His moan is all I need to speed the pace and grind my wet folds over him for friction.
The twitching of his phallus at my effort excited me for the salty flood of his cum. I drank it in and let the rest fall on my breasts and stomach as I sat back on his face. He has me on my back in seconds, licking his cum of me with his knee between my legs. I cannot help but to ride him for any pressure. I’m almost to the edge when he bites down on my neck and I climax into the pain.
I’m stuck dumb. His bite still holding, my body pricks with another wave of deranged arousal as I display my neck to him further. When he finally releases himself from me, his grip is around my ankle, holding it above my head. He slides himself up through my folds and enters deep as I arch myself into him. After what felt like hours of emptiness, his girth spreads me wide and gives me pleasure beyond content. I cannot help but bite down on his shoulder to secure myself in my body as he rhythmically churns my stomach into ecstasy with his face buried in my hair. His body drips sweat into my mouth and eyes. I claw his forearms as my body shakes with heat. He pounds harder and faster into me and the sound of him slapping against me sends me into waves of release. He plunges deep, pouring his hot seed into my core, satisfying my greed.
When he leaves my embrace, he takes it upon himself to lick every drop of cum spilled from me, then carry me over to the bath of cool water to bathe.
i think there is something to be said about this wave of white women made media that is so surface level with an underlying racist and/or insensitive bias and that refuses to engage with criticism. i'm talking taylor swift's the life of a showgirl, emerald fennell's wuthering heights, colleen hoover, the acotar series and booktok in general, etc. whenever you dare to raise concerns about the superficiality or the questionable writing or the treatment of poc in those pieces you get shut down with a "it's not that deep" or "let women have fun". this weaponisation of misogyny to justify slop made for mass consumption, especially considering how wide spread it is becoming, scares me quite a bit. to quote princess weekes, "the girlypopification of anti-intellectualism" is truly concerning, and i do believe it is linked to the rise of far right movements worldwide. if you refuse to engage with what you are being presented with, and exclusively consume brain smoothing content "for fun" then yeah you do become more susceptible to propaganda. it is that deep.
What do you mean “chat” is now referring to ChatGPT and not twitch chat? What? What? What the fuck? No?
When I address chat I am speaking to a presumed Greek chorus of real human people shitposting on their lunch break, not a machine that devours lakes to covert electricity into slop.
"only 90s kids remember-" wrong, if you're poor and/or rural enough, old tech and fashion doesn't just disappear when it stops being trendy. We had dial-up until 2012
The racism in Lotr really is the worst…………….like…..Lotr supposed to be this story about love that transcends where you’re from or who you are, about different people coming together at the end of the world, but that message ends up feeling so hypocritical when racism is embedded in the fabric of how Tolkien wrote Lord of the Rings, and in how Peter Jackson and co chose to mindlessly reproduce Tolkien’s racist coding in the films.
I do ultimately have the view that you can enjoy things while acknowledging terrible aspects of them. I don’t believe we have to throw Lord of the Rings out, just that we should “understand the author’s prejudices, and be mindful of how they affect his work.” But again I’m white, so this issue isn’t really as painful/visceral for me.
But yeah it’s just……. Lotr is about the good quote “white-skins” from the English-coded countries of “the west” fighting the quote “least lovely Mongol types” and “black men like half-trolls” and “slant-eyed foreigners” and Asian-coded easterlings/African-coded Haradrim of the sinister “East…” I know people like to twist themselves into knots trying to explain how it’s Secretly Not Racist (even though it obviously is) but it’s horrible that there’s clearly a reason so many people on the far-right see Lord of the Rings as something that validates their awful awful worldviews. It’s ultimately a story about the Good White People from the West vs the evil POC from the East. The speeches about the glory of the West wouldn’t be out of place in videos by vicious monsters like Jordan Peterson
And I know that some of the racial coding on the heroes is ambiguous in the book (like Sam) but I hate it when that’s used as a way for people to pretend Lord of the Rings “secretly isn’t racist at all.” Like, Sam is described as brown, and you can make a convincing argument that Tolkien intended for him to be a POC– but Sam is the pale white Frodo’s lower-class servant who literally calls Frodo his master. A couple characters possibly being POC doesn’t fix the huge overarching problems with the insidious way Tolkien used racial coding (white/fair= good, hero, wealthy; brown= evil, villainous, lower-class, servant, shady). It’s not a problem of a couple characters or just “not enough representation,” it’s a problem with Lord of the Rings on a deep thematic level.
Side note: I do think the racism in the Peter Jackson films is different from the racism in the books, but I am also very wary of this Thing I occasionally see where people act like the PJ films were the ones that created all the racism…… the PJ films deserve every ounce of criticism they receive on the way they handled race, but the books do as well, and I’m uncomfortable when people bring up the racism in the pj films specifically only to downplay, excuse, or flat-out deny the racism in the books. Even if a lot is different the overarching problems with the horrible racist coding in the films have their origins in the overarching problems with the racism/racist coding Tolkien wrote.
It’s a problem with literal racial cariacatures like Ghan-Buri-Ghan, and all the times when Tolkien uncritically portrays colonialism as a thing that was ultimately Fine while portraying the people who fight back against their colonizers as Deeply Misguided at best (the Wild Men joining Saruman because they don’t understand that the Rohirrim who colonized them are Good Actually.) And thematic things like the way the book ends with the Shire closing its borders to anyone who isn’t of their race, and this being portrayed as a good decision. earlier Tolkien says “the wide world is about you– you can fence yourselves in, but you cannot forever fence it out” but in the end the Shire just fences the world out, fences out all the foreigners and immigrants, and this is portrays as the Right solution to their problems. (Honestly I HATE this plot point so much! It also is a clear example of what I was saying about how the racism/xenophobia is hypocritical…the plot point where the Shire fences the world out makes no sense with the overarching idea that “you cannot forever fence the world out.” Tolkien was so busy being xenophobic he didn’t notice it contradicted the themes of his own book)
I really hate how that hypocrisy really is at the center of Lord of the Rings– the hypocrisy of preaching love and kindness while at the same time coding the villains as POC and coding the heroes white, they hypocrisy of trying to be a critique of fascism/the industrialization of war while using imagery that fascists love and agree with.
I’m not going to throw Lord of the Rings away, because I imprinted on to it when I was a Child and it’s incredibly important to me. I especially need Lord of the Rings now, because it helps me get through times of stress! But I do think that part of adulthood is realizing that you can’t love anything “purely” and it’s okay to have complicated relationships with the things you care deeply about. I also think that if your love for something is so shallow that it shatters under the realization that it’s deeply flawed, you might not have actually loved it that much to begin with.
Idk if this is coherent but a major theme of Lord of the Rings is that stories are like language; they have to grow and change with the cultures that created them if they want to stay relevant. And if I want to end this essay on a somewhat hopeful note I’ll say that I think if lotr wants to stay relevant, it does need to change, and it’s capable of changing. And acknowledging the deep awful racism of the original story is the first step to allowing the story to grow.
the only reliable, effective way of "protecting children" is education. but people don't want to hear that because they don't actually care about protecting children, they care about protecting a mythologised ideal of innocence
It’s raining here in North Texas and I was possessed.
My Dear Greed
Lace curtains hang to the floor of the bedroom lit bule from the overcast. Silent, the bed is warm, the air is still. Breaths come and pass resembling ocean tide. Warmth is all that is desired. Slow kisses and bites to skin to feel the gentleness. Rocking in embrace, the quiet comes lapping in louder. Light touches, skin. The pressure feels right coming from inside. No secrets, only greed, only visions. Golden swirls dance back and forth cast across the ceiling from the tree outside. Slowness is all that exists here. Wasted away is everything else. Thin linens fold encapsle breathing further muffled, sinking. Tides changing. Tears swell and tease. All begins to shake and visions fade. Moon glow casts creatures on the closet door. So scarry, so vulnerable, alone.
Inspired by listening to l @mothercain ‘s Vacillator on loop.