Three of Clubs

the system is dead // gun to my head // I’ve got the way out // so watch and learn you fucking coward // this will kill someone

[wil-at-the-helm]

I’m gonna pin an about me now:

Wil, he/they ☿, pan/pan

Level 28. S.5, P.9, E.3, C.6, I.8, A.4, L.5

If y’all follow, I usually follow back (:

Wil-ipedia under the cut:

I yap, I yearn, I aim to serve and please.

Been on Tumblr since ‘12. As a general rule, I don’t interact with anyone unless I can confirm how old they are, for my own personal comfort. Please be 18+ if you’re gonna interact with me more than likes/rbs/etc.

I am a rural SE Missourian who studies (and searches For) cryptids and other bumps in the night across my Home region. I’ve witnessed a few, and I’ve got plenty of stories. I even founded an organization and am in the process of uploading videos dedicated to stories about my witnessed evidence. I’ll take you on abandoned property tours if you ask nicely :)

I play Quite a lot of D&D, MtG, a handful of video games, I read a lot of books, and was on a podcast but it’s on hiatus. I keep a daily journal which I’ve been told helps Work through my mental health struggles. Ask me anything about anything, though!

I’m a Huge music nerd, I listen to nearly everything and love to Grow and expand on my library of liked songs. Ask me what I’m currently listening to and tell me what you’re listening to also :)

My asks and inbox are Always open. My Discord is [ wil-at-the-helm ] if you want a quicker response or Desire to be friends. Seriously. Nothing is off limits to talk about unless you’re a bot. Curious about spooks? What’s my latest conspiracy theory? What’s on repeat? Wanna know something NSFW? Ask!

[wil-at-the-helm]

Officially working with the organizing committee and a few merchant tables for my local board game convention circuit! On top of the card shop job, and my judge certs for MtG, I think I’m finally moving towards my goal of working in the tabletop gaming scene.

It’s mostly in the Midwest for now, I’ve worked at three in the Kansas City area and four in the St. Louis region, one in Iowa, and I’m set to do one next month near Chicago. My local shop (and myself) are near StL so it does require a lot of traveling, but, chasing your dreams is just as literal as it is metaphorical.

Now, to find a partner to enjoy all of this with. Such a shame for all of this to be enjoyed alone ):

[wil-at-the-helm]

If I don’t win any of my games tonight in Magic then that’s okay because I’m still learning and getting better!

(This user has been playing since 2010)

(This user helped pioneer the Commander and Oathbreaker formats in his hometown gaming circles)

(This user is proof that being well seasoned in the game doesn’t mean you’re inherently the best at it)

[wil-at-the-helm]

I really ain't built for anything casual.

I've had a mutual interest (at least further than "internet person shares a trait that I keep") in two people in the past six-ish months. Each one implied that they were after something permanent, something serious, a life built rather than a fling had.

The first person backed out quick, when I made a joke about the future, that they didn't see themselves a part of. Not in a serious way, but in the "that sounds lovely, for some other time or person".

The second made it to a further point; bodies shared a space, words and warmth traded, what followed was "I don't think I am prepared to make this any more than physical, at least for awhile."

So here I am. Somehow finding companionship in those who seek only the excitement of the chase and not the comfort of the catch.

How much is it to ask, to seek, to need only the permanence of another?

[8-bitfiction]

[predbaited]

hi there exists a song called "Chloroform Girl" by Polkadot Cadaver that once awakened something in me, and then your blog ended up in my peripherals and. Well. here we are.

wow excellent song!!!! posting this so i can save it forever. thank you!!!!

[wil-at-the-helm]

You're welcome! It's right up there with "Love You to Death" and "Orange Peel Sunrise" for me on the songs you don't play for a romantic interest until second date territory

[fujokafka]

we need to bring back old school tumblr communication and im so serious. sending an ask to a mutual just to say hello. seeing three different asks in your inbox all asking how your dentist appointment went. seeing a post you think one of your mutuals would enjoy and tagging them/sending it to them in the dms. nowadays its just silently liking a post or (if youre feeling extreme) replying under posts. WHAT HAPPENED TO US!! we used to be a proper community!!!! #LetsBringWhimsyBack

[andthelaw]

reblog if you want ppl to send you random lil' asks

[deadrule]

im a bad puppy so theyre putting me down at the vet tomorrow

[taxidermychrist-deactivated2025]

i’m not meant to be on the internet i’m meant to be at the bottom of a ditch somewhere

[wil-at-the-helm]

Board game convention completed. Skylight selfie

[prettyboykatsuki-moved]

i always mean it when i say i love you btw

[prettyboykatsuki-moved]

‘but thats a stranger you dont know’ and i love them. i love that they exist and i love that they passed through my life. and i love u too btw

[teathattast]

reblog to tell your mutuals you love them for existing

[wil-at-the-helm]

Squirtle Squad Leader 3D printed light box for the gaming setup, maybe life is becoming a little more worth it nowadays.

[wil-at-the-helm]

It's a good feeling when something is a universal experience, or when you react a certain way and then see later on that somebody else reacted the same way, independent of you.

In this vein, one of my Therapists showed me the song "Blonde Hair, Black Lungs" by Sorority Noise, which parallels my previous few months in a way that's almost too perfect. Got dumped out of a six year relationship, for someone else. Drove out to a family member's house (way too fast for these back country roads) right after, and totaled my truck in a shallow creek bed on the way. Get the "i miss you" message three months later while actively making the steps to an-hero. Currently in talk therapy to avoid and recover from the an-hero-ing attempt.

I hadn't heard this song until now. Really listened and got in there with the lyrics. It feels vindicating, to know that the "drive fast, crash your car, die before you feel anything" isn't anything new. I dunno though.

[wil-at-the-helm]

Can’t I just have someone next to me, so that I can roll into their arms and let my emotions flow freely?

Don’t I deserve that, too?

[wil-at-the-helm]

I’m refusing to download any of the forsaken dating apps so if anyone wants me I’m here I’m around I’m asking politely (and a little disrespectfully)

[pronounyaoi]

dude stop before i develop a strange and powerful fondness for you

[bittergourdsoup-deactivated2024]

i could be your loser boyfriend. do you ever think about that

[shawtest-deactivated20130729]

wow you have the best taste in music

unzip ur pants