* stay with me

how do you turn a forest fire like me so soft i turn into running water

[windbled]

MOVED TO CYANIDEHEARTS

[windbled]

plot call.

so i just came back from the longest hiatus (rip) and since ansel’s muse has been bothering me again, like this and i’ll come to your IMs for plots? or i’ll just- reblog an icebreaker meme so you guys can something in, ok?

[spected-archive]

here, with @moonbled.

he freezes in place at the mention of the last word, briefly, the most motion he makes being an upward scrunch of his shoulders.

hit me with the damn misdiagnosis, he wishes to say, almost begging for the resident to offer a bunch of blood tests and x-rays if it means proving certain hereditary patterns wrong. but he sighs instead, swinging his legs back and forth as he rubs his wrist soothingly with his thumb and sticks his tongue out the corner of his lip. how else is he allowed to dodge the question at hand?

joking around is all that seems to be in his repertoire for today. “look, it’s probably nothing. sprains heal within weeks, right? with… ice. and not going out a lot.” there’s a shaky exhale. “i can do that. no problem.”

at least he hopes it’s not. lacking health insurance is enough of a pain on its own.

[windbled]

he quirks an eyebrow at the other male, the words ‘fatigue’ and ‘loss of consciousness’ upon the chart noted dully. “you sprained your foot when you fainted in your workplace, which might be a symptom to another condition.” he looks pale--which could be a sign of malnutrition or lack of sleep. ansel made sure to jot it down in his prognosis for the time being. “my job is to make sure it’s either harmless or noticed in its early stages--whatever it is.”

honestly, his job is merely checking out symptoms and putting a prognosis for his seniors to decide an action on. but at the same time he doesn’t like half-assing things; if ansel could find out the reason behind these symptoms by himself, then he’d do it.  all he needs is mr. sang’s consent and he’d be on his merry way. “i would have to perform auscultation now, if you could please lift your shirt.”

hopefully no blood tests or mri and ct scans are required--those things cost much more than the others.

[windbled]

─ Copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in yours. when you’re done, tag up to ten people and tag the person who tagged you.

tagged by: @trouvxilles (thank you mom) tagging: @soliosxghni , @ksoobaby , @blindsensed , @clementide , @xaviernam + anyone who wants to do it & who hasn’t !!

A - AGE: “uh, i was born in 1990... 27?” B - BIGGEST FEAR: “opening up a patient to find a facehugger on their chest cavity?? alien movie scarred me for life to be honest.” C - CURRENT TIME: “9:54am. just got out of my shift!” D - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: "the hospital’s shitty coffee” E - EVERY DAY STARTS WITH: “depends. mostly auto-accident patients, but there are occasional bdsm gone wrong too. yeah, i’ve pulled out beer bottles or flashlights from someone’s ass more times than i’d like to admit.” F - FAVOURITE SONG: “when’s the last time i get to listen to proper music... uh, hero by family of the year i guess?” G - GHOSTS ARE THEY REAL: "uh, i’m not much of paranormal guy. i mean i live alone so i’d rather not discuss that??” I - IN LOVE WITH: “anyone who left me that cheatsheet in the library before the final exam years ago. man you saved my ass.”

K - KILLED SOMEONE: "......i work in the A&E unit so......” L - LAST TIME YOU CRIED: “two days ago. don’t ask why. ” M - MIDDLE NAME: “is this really necessary... it’s um, ‘ferdinand’. my dad almost gave me ‘ferdinandelix’ but haneul managed to save my future first.” N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: “three half-brothers and a twin brother. baekho died when i was around five or six though.” P - PERSON YOU LAST CALLED/TEXTED: “i paged the cardio-thoracic surgeon for an emergency procedure. does that count?” Q - QUESTIONS YOU ARE ALWAYS ASKED: "...how does it feel to have an insane mother?” R - REASONS TO SMILE: “i don’t know, that i get to have a decent sleep cycle since residency?” S - SONG LAST SANG: “batman theme song because a little boy won’t go to sleep until i sing it with him.” T - TIME YOU WOKE UP: “5 pm to get ready for my night shift.” U - UNDERWEAR COLOUR: “...black.” liar, it’s a spongebob-themed boxers. V - VACATION DESTINATION: “south korea, i guess? nothing feels like home right?” W - WORST HABIT: "smoking? i’m a doctor, i should be against it.” X - X-RAYS YOU’VE HAD: "i lost count-” Y - YOUR FAVOURITE FOOD: “japanese curry. and korean fried chicken?? the ones lathered in honey sauce? damn now my mouth is watering.” Z- ZODIAC SIGN: "pisces. what’s that have to do with anything?”

[an-exotic-writer]

five word prompts

[inspired by this]

“actually… i just miss you.”

“alright, i’ll leave you alone.”

“and slowly… i was forgotten.”

“and then everything just disappears.”

“and where do i go?”

“anyone could tell from here.”

“are you finishing that or…?”

“are you stupid or stupid?”

“anything, just call me, okay?”

“bitch better have my money.”

“bro… that’s so… not cool…”

“but did you do it?”

“call me now. it’s urgent.”

"can’t you listen to me?”

“cross that. don’t answer that.”

“don’t even think about it.”

“don’t you dare walk away.”

“do it. i dare you.”

“did you think i forgot?”

“eventually… you just move on.”

“even if you still do.”

“everything will fall into place.”

“fight me, you attractive stranger.”

“for once, i need you.”

“for once… i was right.”

“for once… i was wrong.”

“forget i even asked you.”

“forget it. you fucking suck.”

“fuck’s sake, what’s your problem?”

“fuck off. i mean it.”

“give and take. that’s life.”

“great. perfect. nice. fuck this.”

“have you lost your mind?”

“hello? it’s me. i was-”

“hey… that wasn’t so nice.”

“here’s a glass of whatever.”

“how about a hug, hm?”

“how about you make me?”

“i haven’t forgot you yet.”

“i can’t be around you.”

“i don’t need you, really.”

“i don’t need this now.”

“is this your first time?”

“it’s just a cut, really.”

“it wasn’t me, i swear!”

“i said i love you.”

“just don’t fuck it up.”

"just… come back alive, okay?”

“just make sure you’ve eaten.”

“kick his ass for me.”

“killed him? wait, what, literally?”

“life really sucks. feel better.”

“letting go hurts… a lot.”

“let me live, will you?”

“no, i don’t need you.”

“nothing can hurt me now.”

“nothing matters anymore to me.”

“okay it was me… so?”

“people lie all the time.”

“pipe the fuck down, asshole.”

“please, you can’t die now.”

“please don’t leave me alone.”

“quiet. they can hear us.”

“quick! give me your phone!”

“quicker, you freaking piece of-”

“quit it or i’ll bite.”

“quit staring! they’ll notice us!”

"really? do i look stupid?”

“real smooth, tripping over air.”

“rise and shine, sweet thing.”

“rise and fucking shine, motherfucker.”

“seriously? give me a break.”

“so… what are we now?”

“so… did you miss me?”

“so… can we go eat?”

“so… when’s the next flight?”

“so… how did everything go?”

“sometimes, i wish you died.”

“so what? you did it.”

“time passes slower without you.”

“then what do you suggest?”

“the fuck? who are you?”

“then you tell me why.”

“this is not working out.”

“this isn’t what i wanted.”

“this is all a fucking disaster.”

“when did it all happen?”

“who knew you’d be here?”

“why do i even bother?”

“why do i love you?”

“why didn’t you tell me?”

“you’re just… so, so stupid.”

“you can’t be here now.”

“you look like an accident.”

“you really need to go.”

“you know who to call.”

"zero fucks given. next please.”

[windbled]

plot call.

so i just came back from the longest hiatus (rip) and since ansel’s muse has been bothering me again, like this and i’ll come to your IMs for plots? or i’ll just- reblog an icebreaker meme so you guys can something in, ok?

[windbled]

trouvxilles:

“that’s not really unlike me. i don’t know why you’re so surprised.” he shakes his head, a smile forming on his lips because he’s relieved baekhyun would humor him. then again, who else could do it better than baekhyun? jeonghan laces their fingers together. “i put a tequila shot in my morning coffee.” that’s only half a joke because he only does it half the time. he starts tugging baekhyun along to the direction of a nearby coffee shop when the other’s words make him freeze mid-step.

it’s not so much the gift hunting but the certain event that comes after. they don’t talk about it. no one does. it’s almost an unspoken rule. whoever brings it up during conversation is dubbed the biggest asshole of the group. jeonghan has to force a laugh, although it sounded breathless, as if the wind had been knocked right out of him. “yeah,” he manages, turning to baekhyun once again with a wide grin. “let’s go do that.”

jeonghan thinks it would be a breath of fresh air to make new - better - memories with someone he cares about. he still feels guilty for somewhat ruining that little shopping trip by blowing up when branwen arrived. jeonghan squeezes baekhyun’s hand as they walk to the direction of the strip mall. “i really missed you,” he admits. “you know that, right?”

a hearty laugh escapes easily, baekhyun had to hold back his voice from getting weird stares from the passerbys. “you’re right, you’re right. liquid courage, right?” maybe he can learn a thing or two from jeonghan--maybe he could try his method and maybe he can numb himself up from everything the world has to throw at him on daily basis. in this turn of events, it’s a curse to feel something so deeply. “i’ll keep that in mind, though.”  

the fingers around his felt grounding, as if it was a weight that will keep him on his feet instead of getting carried away with the current tempest brewing in his being. and baekhyun needs that. he’s this close to breaking down and bawling like a baby on the streets. 

the next words that comes felt like an arrow to his chest. chanyeol’s words repeating itself again and again in his head. would jeonghan lie to him? their friends never lie. they tell it like it is. and jeonghan is probably the closest friend he had after jongup. but chanyeol doesn’t lie too. he wouldn’t lie to him. “i-i know.” he supplies a smile, hopefully one that’s believable enough to be genuine. “i miss you too! i miss this a lot. us.” eyes shifts to their hands clasped together--hoping it’s real and genuine and not made up like his fiance said.

for now, he let himself believe.

the shop catches his attention and suddenly memories come crashing down. laughter, tears, anger. their friendship wasn’t exactly the most normal ones but they still manage to work in such a dysfunctional dynamic. baekhyun wonders if perhaps it’s their similarities as a bunch of ‘mongrels’ that sticks them together. “i miss everyone too. veo, ven, amelia, bran, jongup, nat, seungjun, kris...” his voice trails off for a moment. “adulthood is shit, huh.”

[windbled]

this town.

[windbled]

trouvxilles:

the fountain is definitely a prize to behold. it didn’t take long for them to find it. ravenclaw intellect, jeonghan guesses. after all, there’s two of them. or he and baekhyun just make a great team. they always have been, and as a group even more so. jeonghan doesn’t know if he should look at this thought with fondness or sadness - he decides with both. but he pushes it at the very back of his mind, and focuses on marveling at the fountain.

“i would, too. if we had any space for it.” he chuckles at this, letting go of baekhyun’s hand as they approach the marble wonder. “if you do get in touch, can you send me the details via owl postal?” he’s not sure where he might be at that time considering his situation, but he’s not stepping out of international borders, so an owl would probably be his best option. “veo might be interested to have one in the jung manor.”

he places the bottle of wine on the smooth edge of the fountain, and he sits. jeonghan carelessly rolls his sleeves up, doesn’t even bother fixing it when it slowly slips back down. he dips the tips of his fingers into the water, looking up only when baekhyun calls for him. “yeah –?” cold water splashes his face, and jeonghan gasps - but then laughs, loud and blissful. the most genuine laugh he’s let out all night. he pushes himself off the edge of the fountain, moves toward his friend to splash water back at him, but this time harder.

“should i open the wine?” he suggests, splashing baekhyun once more. “or would you rather drown in dirty fountain water?”

when he’s not on a broom, baekhyun is clumsy. he’s a mess of uncoordinated limbs and sometimes uneven footing that would easily cause him a faceplant to the ground or two. so perhaps it’s the alcohol running in his veins that grants a burst of energy for the male to evade jeonghan’s attacks, toeing his shoes off before stepping into the fountain to retaliate.

“what would be the fun in that?” his mind feels clear, vision suddenly sharpened. blood thrums in his ears and in his veins. he feels alive for the first time in months. he ought to thank whatever force that brought him to this party, to meet jeonghan again, to find his lost youth. it’s like he’s back to being eighteen again, young and ready to face the world. not twenty-two and dying from the mundane daily life of a heir.

but in the end everything has to come to an end; they’re not alone, and if someone finds them there acting like a bunch of children both of their reputations would be ruined. to be honest it’s not like he cares about his anymore, but the other male got into where he is now with hard work and baekhyun doesn’t want to be the reason behind it’s undoing.

so he rolls his sleeves and steps out of the fountain, still with that huge smile on his face. “okay, okay. wine it is. but we’re not leaving until it’s empty.” slumps by the fountain, letting his back rest on the concrete wall. he pats the vacant spot next to him. the stars look so much brighter from this part of the city.  “and that means we’re going to share this equally because both of us has a lot of things to tell and forget. starting from you.”

[sillagc]

— ｡FOND YOUTH ;

[windbled]

sillagc:

                   amelia wished there was a spell that could help her be less clumsy. it’s hard to stop herself from feeling sorry as she crawled around trying to get the papers. she would have to rearrange them again which would mean that she had to stay behind and work late hours again. she hated wearing this pencil skirt and the heels and the blouse. she had to at least look mature, you see. so she had to go through extra lengths. even the red lipstick annoyed her, since it left marks on her cups or smear. it wasn’t the stranger’s fault, she knew, but she was angry anyways.

                          she heard him speak and something about his tone made her feel embarrassed about the whole situation. again. but she pushed it down, opting to feel something entirely different instead. irritation. anger. or both at the same time. it wasn’t until she looked up, ready to strike again (how did he even know her name?), did she see who it was. her lower lip trembled a little. it had been a while since she had seen any of her friends back in hogwarts. they were so very few and busy with their own lives that she had chosen to fade into the background, forgotten. she chose to be mute as she walked past them, simply happy to know they are alright.

                       she took the stack from him, her aching arms trying to carry all of them. she was speechless, not knowing what to say. how are you? hi! it’s been a while! how long have you been working here? why haven’t i seen you around? she parted her lips, about to say something, but instead she let out a sob. tears soon ran down her face, her face contorting as she sobbed out loudly. it took her a few minutes before she finally calmed down, crying out her frustrations and her loneliness in front of the familiar face…at a rather inconvenient place. they were guaranteed stares and whispers among people but she honestly didn’t care.

                         byun baekhyun was one of her best friends. “i’ll tell on them for sure. just because you haven’t showed yourself before now,” she said and tried to laugh it off. “i’m sorry for suddenly crying,” she said. “i was just happy to see you. and well…it just came out.” she hadn’t realized how much she missed baekhyun before this moment. she couldn’t take her eyes off him, trying to grasp any detail that was amiss and familiar at the same time. she called upon fond memories of their time spent at school, their adventures inside and outside of the castle. and how, while every memory was not happy, they were the best memories of her life.

                        “i– i haven’t seen you here before today. have you been working here long?” she asked, trying to fish for her wand. when she found it, she whispered the levitation spell, taking the papers out of her hands. she massaged her arm with her free hand, smiling widely. “you need to tell me everything. that’s your punishment for stepping on these confidential documents.”

every pull and push of his muscles is cautious around the hufflepuff girl. baekhyun isn’t unnecessarily lanky or anything, but he’s well aware that his limb-to-limb coordination is a tad crooked. more often that not he finds himself accidentally hitting someone on the nose with his hand or hit them on the stomach with his elbow and really--that’s the last thing he wants to happen during their first reunion for months now. so baekhyun chooses to restrain both arms behind his back after he hands her the pieces of scattered papers.

smiling though, comes natural. the weigh that settles on his back seem to disappear at this pleasant turn of events.  amelia looks so shaken that it would be comical if they weren’t in the ministry then. “oh no, i hope my punishment isn’t severe enough to be put into azkaban,” hands lifts onto the air in mock surrender, that square grin still plastered upon his features. when amelia apologizes though, baekhyun teases her easily. “it’s okay, as long they’re tears of joy. and i would cry too with that amount of paperwork.“ chin points at the stack of papers upon her hands.

“oh no, i stopped working here a month ago actually.” he recalls his grandfather’s wish for him to inherit the family’s wealth, and suddenly his smile falters a little. “i used to work in the Health Department, but family issues...” rolls his eyes. “you know, all that stuff. i’m here for an errand.”

lips pressed into a thin line, fingers fumble behind his back. should he...? would it be proper if he just appears in her life again out of nowhere and act like nothing happened? they’re supposed to be friends. friends aren’t supposed to break off contact with their other friends, even if it’s done not on purpose. he still feel slightly guilty from suddenly disappearing from the face of the earth after that incident in winter break.

but again, good friends will understand. and amelia is probably the kindest one out of their group.

“hey, um.” he scratches the back of his head, another hand slips into the comfort of his pants’ pocket. “if you’re free after work, why don’t we get a cup of coffee? you know... to catch up with everything?” after a moment of pondering, he adds; “i really miss you.”

[windbled]

hello! i’m sorry for the lack of activity lately ; A ;  irl things got out of hand and i’m still occupied until next week or so. ansel’s muse is alive i promise! post will be queued. meanwhile im always open to plotting via IM if you’re ever interested!

[windbled]

"if you could trade places with anyone, who would you chose?" / welcome to minimalist!

the question was meant to be an icebreaker--ansel knows that much. but it felt too much to be a coincidence for someone to ask him such things. was he perhaps an undercover journalist? then again, the other doesn’t seem like someone who would do such things.

even if he does, nothing could guarantee ansel would tell the truth. he lied to himself for all these years, why would that change anytime soon?

“hmm,” he rubs his chin in mock contempt, a small smile curling the corner of his lips. “i don’t know, my professor, i guess?” at least he doesn’t have the media constantly on his tail, trying to bring his family down. 

[windbled]

A  VERY  DESCRIPTIVE  &  DETAILED  PROFILE  OF  YOUR  MUSE. Repost with the information of your  muse, including  headcanons, etc. when you’re done, tag 15 other people to do the same!

tagged by: @seulpeun @yeozus (thank you for tagging me!) tagging: @trouvxilles @saudxdes @soliosxghni @malfeasore and everyone who sees this! (ignore, if you did this already!!)

NAME: ansel byun AGE: 26   SPECIES: human GENDER: cis male ORIENTATION: textbooksexual demisexual PROFESSION: 1st year resident in a local hospital, posted in the er

[    PHYSICAL    ASPECTS    ]

BODY TYPE: average, fit HAIR: dark brown, dyed a very light brown  EYES: brown SKIN: fair. a little pale from the lack of sun HEIGHT: 172 cm

[    FAMILY    ]

SIBLINGS: haneul, junki (half-brother) baekho (twin brother, deceased), jisoo (half-brother) PARENTS: biological mother alive but locked up in a private institution, biological father alive   CHILDREN: none, and no interest in getting married yet ANY PETS?: none

[    LIKES    ]

COLORS: gentle colors; blue, green, gray, white SMELLS: soft cotton, baby soap, the smell of earth after it rains, a dusty old medical textbook     FOOD / DRINKS: anything that is not instant ramen or instant coffee ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES?: yes  [ x ]  || rarely [ ] || no [ ] FAVORITES: handmade coffee, foggy forest, a cabin in the middle of nowhere, horror movies, the cool side of his pillow, lying on a kept bed, quiet moments in his kitchen, holding hands, old books

[    OTHER    DETAILS    ]

SMOKES?: yes  [ x ]   ||   no  [   ]   ||   occasionally  [   ] DRUGS?: yes  [   ]   ||   no  [ x ]   ||   occasionally  [   ] (briefly experimented with drugs in highschool) DRIVER LICENSE?: yes  [ x ]   ||   no  [   ] EVER BEEN ARRESTED?: yes  [   ]   ||   no  [   ]   ||   almost/detained  [ x ]

[windbled]

"this isn't any of your business."

six-word starters | accepting!

“no, it’s probably not.” indifference laces his tone, features mirroring his exact words. patients like these is almost a daily breakfast for ansel and as much as he’d love to entertain them with an equally biting remark, this is a professional environment. “but it’s my business to know what my patient has been up to.”

you’re a doctor, ansel. stay calm. “i can’t treat you properly if you don’t tell me what caused this. the last thing we both want is to get you a misdiagnosis.”

[fakingitdarling]

You’re fine as long as your scars aren’t visible, right?

(via fakingitdarling)

[windbled]

“Are you having nightmares again?” // welcome to minimalist! apologize that this is super late;;

breathing comes in a mouthful of air and painful inhales. memories of his nightmares fading away along with the cold tiles of hospital’s floor colliding against his nose. for a moment everything is disoriented, mind still hazy from the sudden shift to consciousness. how did he get on the floor– and most importantly, why is joowon here?

“i’m-” he tries to explain, but ends up sounding weird from the impact to his nose. his hand flies to scratch his cheeks with a nervous laugh. the image of his twin’s face flashing in her mind. “sort of- i guess.”

ansel attempts to stand up, wincing when his hips made a cracking sound. god he hoped he didn’t do anything weird in his sleep–at least not in front of the younger male. “sorry, i didn’t scare you or anything, right? what did i say?”

[windbled]

🎧

random starter meme | accepting!🎧: first line of the next song on shuffle as a starter

▶ call me baby // exo

“this street is completely crazy”

south korea should feel like a home for him. it was his birthplace, the place where he spent the first five years of his peaceful life before shit hits the fan. but the crowd here feels too intrusive, too close, too tight. he can’t breathe. as if someone is gonna pop out a camera and ask the same questions all over again. is your mother really insane? where’s your eldest brother now? how does it feel to be the only one left in the family?

perhaps it was his own fault for choosing hongdae as his place to go for the night. he wanted to see the nightlife in seoul with his own eyes, since he doesn’t come home very often. in fact this is probably his first time ever returning after the big move. it’s the family company’s twenty-fifth anniversary, and father thought it would be a good idea to celebrate it where everything started; home. 

his lips quirked at the thought. home. what is a home anyway? certainly not the brick and cement of house in toronto they call the byun residences.

a yawn escapes his lips. only then ansel realized he had been walking aimlessly throughout the neighborhood, hands devoid of any sort of new items or souvenirs to get for his colleagues in portland. most of the streetfood vendors are already cleaning up their stalls too, save for a couple of 24/7 fastfood restaurants. welp, at least he could get a cheeseburger before returning to the hotel.

as if on cue, his eyes catches a familiar girl nearly blending into the bright city lights, features immediately recognized by his hunger-hazed mind. the girl resembled someone from his childhood, but there are something different about her--ansel couldn’t put his finger on it. same face, but different behavior. he decided to approach her slowly anyway, mostly because he’s a curious asshole and catching up with an old friend after years of disappearing under the radar would be a good way to close the day. 

“…eunha? park eunha, right?”

[sandcvstles]

six-word sentences.

[rivxt]

blueneighbcrhood:

“ frankly speaking, I wanna give up. ” 

“ just try to guess the answer. ”

“ everyone here knows you don’t care. ”

“ fine, do things your way. ”

“I  want to be in love. ”

“ no, I would rather make money. ”

“ shut up already, I’m not going. ”

“ because you said that, fuck you! ”

“ I hate you more than anything. ”

“ just sit down? let me explain? ”

“ can I be a little nasty? ”

“ there’s nothing wrong with being sexual. ”

“ I want you to like me. ”

“ don’t you dare lie to me. ”

“ I’m way too scared to fall. ”

“ terrified of my love for you? ”

“ we were both afraid, shut up. ”

“ it wasn’t anyone’s fault. not really. ”

“ life’s too short to care anymore. ”

“I  dreamt about you last night. ”

“ really? what did you dream about? ”

“ I dreamt you chose me instead. ”

“ how did you become like this? ”

“ this isn’t any of your business. ”

“ I’m losing my mind, losing control. ”

“ you weren’t there! I needed you! ”

“ please don’t start with me, okay? ”

“ why do you always leave me? ”

“ this is all we have left. ”

“ I turned around. you were gone. ”

“ all I can think about is you. ”

“ wow, you look like shit today. ”

“ I called and you didn’t answer. ”

“ I wanna be a child forever. ”

“ today, my love is in mourning. ” 

“ your words felt like sharp knives. ”

“ say something nice or don’t speak. ”