me Blogthing

a shrimple blogthing. it mine. Perpetually fascinated by humans. he/they

[evilwizard]

wake up people. big bad wolf breath can’t melt straw beams. the first little pig was an inside job

[omnybus]

Swine/11

[evilwizard]

no there were 3

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[moghedien]

I feel like I need to share this because idk if Europeans are familiar with the presence of Aldi in the US, but at least especially in my area they’ve been growing a lot recently. Like Aldi bought out some local failing grocery chains where I live (Louisiana) and have opened Aldis in all these somewhat rural communities and small towns, which for the record I’m fine with

But as a result of this they are advertising a lot more in my area and also in many cases, the people in these areas have never been confronted with Aldi or any European grocery store. So the ads that Aldi is pushing out to its new US customer base feature a cowboy shopping at Aldi who is explaining to new Aldi customers how Aldi works. Like this cowboy is explaining you gotta put a quarter in the shopping cart and why there are very little name brands. A cowboy is how they want to reach their American customer base. They gave us a cowboy

[moghedien]

Here he is, the Aldi Cowboy

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

if yallve been looking for me professionally for the last few days a very odd combination of my girlfriends birthday celebrations and me having an incredibly wretched food poisoning/stomach flu bout has made the last couple days a bizarre fever dream

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

im doin better yall. recovering on her couch, nested in a large pile of blahaj, got my feel-better supplies

(remotes for the spinny fan)

[epicallyepicnerdery]

[ominous-signs]

My city is notoriously bad at handling roundabouts/traffic circles, so someone ended up posting this right before one of the worst ones 😂

[ominous-signs]

Every time I pass by this sign Im intrigued by it, and worried for tim.

[anistarrose]

if you are a parent, or may become one, or you are otherwise likely to arrive in the situation of caring for a child while they eat, promise me this: if a child doesn't like a certain food or food group, you will ask them WHY. and specifically, you will pay attention to either confirming or ruling out "it makes my mouth itch" or "it makes my stomach hurt," both of which are medically important info that children may not provide unprompted. which i know because this PSA has been brought to you by "i spent my entire childhood and much of my early teens eating peas and lentils while wondering why everyone else liked the Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation so much, like were they a bunch of legume masochists or something, before i finally realized that Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation was in fact a sinister demon appearing only to me, and her true demonic name was: Legume Allergy"

[brainrockets]

Do not let your child suffer from spicy bananas!

[fieldexplores]

Help Me - Gator Days

[isuggestkillingyourself]

[tactfulsaboteur]

[psybomb]

Every time I see that last pic, I have to note that the funniest line is the one immediately after the highlight

[carry-on-my-wayward-butt]

“i also choose this guy’s dead wife” was easily the #1 funniest thing to ever be written on the internet.

[carry-on-my-wayward-butt]

you can know the punchline but you can’t stop it from punching you.

[mighty-meerkat]

i do also feel the need to add that phil8248 really liked the joke. he said his wife had always had a dark sense of humour, even about her illness and death, and seeing the joke made him feel like he was laughing with her one last time.

[moonlitstargazer]

[anhilliator1]

As a reminder if you're wondering why Gundam has so many weird names for people and things, this is why.

[mollyjames]

At that point I think I too would name a character Quattro Bajeena

[beardedmrbean]

[prokopetz]

The secret to always having things go according to plan is to have multiple mutually exclusive plans which between them encompass the entire space of possible outcomes. That way, no matter what happens, it will be according to a plan.

[orteil42]

given the current climate this pride especially i feel i must mention that i love my trans friends, i stand with trans people in the fight against transphobic legislation and those who would enforce it, and this blog is not a good place for you to be if you do not vibe with that

[orteil42]

happy pride! please be kind to yourself. never let them win

[blumineck]

How to spring-load your bow!

This information is freely given. What you do with it is up to you! 🏹💐🧚🏼