DO YOU STILL BELIEVE IN SUPOPORTING RAPE AND PEDOPHILIA FICTION WITH THESE FILES OUT, YOU FUCKING CUNT BITCH?
This message is a good example of the kind of harassment I have been subjected to for a long time now.
I am leaving it up instead of blocking for once because people deserve to see what is actually being said to me and what kind of behavior is being encouraged behind the scenes.
While this particular anon is not re writing my own CSAM and sending it to me directly, which has happened before, and tbh here the framing and intent are the same;
Threaten, degrade, and attempt to force me into silence through pointed abuse and re-traumatization.
This is not someone stumbling onto my blog and having a spontaneous moral crisis.
This message exists because there are multiple groups of dedicated individuals who actively stalk me, monitor my URLs, track my posts, and encourage others to harass me on their behalf.
They coordinate. They keep each other updated. They pass my name around with instructions on how to hurt an indigenous sex trafficking survivor more effectively.
The stated reason for this campaign is that I do not believe fiction should be censored and that I believe consenting adults should be allowed to have whatever sex they want to have.
Instead of engaging with that position honestly, or even disagreeing with it like a normal human being, these people have chosen to deliberately smear the distinction between fiction and real world abuse.
They invoke rape and pedophilia not to protect children, but to gain social permission to attack someone they have decided is an acceptable target.
Let me be very clear about some things:
I am an indigenous survivor of sex trafficking.
I am a survivor of CSAM and CSEM, which still exists online of me. I was just a baby. I was a little baby kiddo. I was sex trafficked locally from the ages of 5 years old to the age of 12. What happened to me was real, and mattered, little kid me did not deserve that.
So.
When you send me messages like this, when you scream accusations at me, when you invoke the worst things that have ever happened to me as a rhetorical weapon, this is how you are choosing to treat a real victim.
Not a hypothetical one. Not an abstract story concept. Not a fictional character.
An actual person who lived through those crimes.
You are not defending children.
You are using the suffering of children as a costume so you can behave abusively while still feeling morally righteous.
Comparing fictional material to real world sexual violence against children is not protective. It is exploitative. It trivializes real harm while actively inflicting new harm on survivors who do not conform to your ideological purity tests.
I am going to be direct about this for once:
One of the central figures driving this harassment is the user rambling-crerchur.
I am naming them explicitly because they have spent a significant amount of time making sure others know my name.
While I can understand anger toward predatory behavior, that anger does not excuse their documented pattern of accusing victims of crimes they did not commit. They repeatedly treat accusation as a weapon rather than a responsibility.
They also have a long and consistent history of stalking trans people, particularly transfemmes and people like me with indigenous genders. Their behavior toward us is not subtle. It is transphobic. It is racist. I even agree that many of the people they choose to stalk are dangerous, but they have added me to a list of real predators because I don't believe cartoons have human rights.
I do not even disagree that many of the people they discuss are dangerous, but some, like me, they have simply latched onto out of a sense of obsession with me and my sex life.
It relies on framing marginalized people as inherently suspicious, inherently dangerous, and inherently disposable.
The fact that they continue to track my URL changes in order to keep tabs on me is not activism.
It is obsessive and it is frankly deeply unsettling.
Even more disturbing is how my consensual adult sex life has been weaponized against me.
I am married to an adult woman. We engage in consensual kink. This has been used by rambling-crerchur and others as an excuse to encourage people to send me my own CSAM, to write fanfiction about my CSAM, and to otherwise retraumatize me on purpose.
There have been explicit attempts to push me toward self harm through this behavior.
I want to force people to actually sit with that.
These are the actions of people who claim to be protecting victims.
This is what their ethics look like when applied to a real survivor.
Not support. Not boundaries. Not care.
Just punishment for failing to behave correctly and quietly.
I am also currently dealing with the impending death of a close family member. That too matters. The total absence of empathy or sympathy here is not accidental.
It is a feature of this ideology.
Antis consistently demonstrate that they are willing to abandon basic human decency the moment they believe cruelty is justified. Grief, trauma, disability, none of it matters if they think they have moral cover.
I usually do not respond to messages like this.
Most of them get deleted or blocked without comment because they are not sent in good faith and do not deserve my energy.
I am responding to this one intentionally because I want there to be a public record. I want people to see exactly what is being done to me, how long it has been happening, and who is actively encouraging it.
If you are reading this and wondering why survivors do not come forward more often, why we hesitate to speak openly, or why we are careful about where and how we exist online, look here.
Because This Is Why.
This is what happens when a survivor refuses to be quiet, refuses to perform the correct kind of victimhood, and refuses to let their trauma be owned by strangers.
You do not get to scream the names of crimes at me and pretend you are doing something righteous. You are not protecting anyone. You are perpetuating harm, and you are doing it with a level of obsession and cruelty that should concern anyone paying attention.
And yes;
I stand by my beliefs.
The existence of a real world predator, no matter how horrific their crimes, does not get to dictate how I think about fiction, art, or imagination.
I cannot even read most of those files at all without being thrown back into my own sex trafficking, into memories of something that ruined my body and mind, and the fact that you try to use them against me tells me everything I need to know about your intent.
Fiction did not do that to me.
Stories did not do that to me.
Real people did that to me. Real people sex trafficked me.
Conflating the two is not justice, it is laziness dressed up as righteousness, and I refuse to let my values be rewritten by people who only understand harm as a tool.
You cannot abuse me into changing my convictions.
You cannot stalk me, harass me, or send your flying monkeys to scream at me until I break and puff your chest up and call it accountability.
I have already survived things that were meant to erase me completely, and I am still here, still living and loving, still choosing my beliefs with clarity and care.
What you are doing is not useful.
It is misguided misfiring desperation.
What I am doing is standing firm in the face of it, and no amount of cruelty is going to turn that resolve into silence.
Please heal your heart, anon.
One of the single most important posts you will ever read on the internet regarding taboo fiction.
The behaviour of individuals like this is not defensible. Even if you find that kind of fiction distasteful- this is extreme. This is why I created WorstofAntis. Because people need to see that anti ideology comes with a real world harmful impact on victims.
