This morning felt like losing you all over again.
oh, there you are, she said.
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

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@writethisheart
This morning felt like losing you all over again.
oh, there you are, she said.
I have loved you for so long.
What do I do now that you are gone?
I’ve never done anything wrong,
miscalculated - yes.
Errors?
Of course.
Who of one of us has never done something with unintentional consequences.
But I’ve never done something careless and hope for the best, screw everything and here I go.
And damn.
I should have.
L
O
S
T
Stagnation is killing me, you guys.
But the fact is, I don’t think I was supposed to ever know. I don’t think I was ever supposed to see and believe. I was just supposed to grow.
Words
are
Everything.
You bend and you break me -
just as you always did
and just as you always have.
I wish I had been ready.
I wish it had been right.
rupture. this. soul
Plip plop,
let me drop,
flop,
please - let it stop.
Chime the bell -
oh hell.
Lift me up, up, up,
let me,
make me,
save me.
Oh hell.
I have always envied peace and tranquility because I always knew the impossibility of it.
I want a breathless beauty. Breaking, silent, bring me to my knees and split me open - for I am yours.
I fight to be your lover
and I
fight to be your sinner.
Sometimes I think that I could love you,
but then I watch you trick the stars.
I feel you hiding mine.
and I am drowning,
drowning in all that you are
and see
life you insist must be.
And I can not stand you -
but I do.
I do and I do and
I do until my face is blue
and I feel the daggers
deepening,
clawing and bleeding.
With all the hate you believe in,
speak in -
how can this feeling
be rude or everything wrong.
And sometimes I wonder how fate
can be such a bitch and betray
trust and love and time for a heart that
would not,
and did not
know what was happening until it was
just
too
late.
Thin lines,
blurry lines,
I am just trying to find
me to you.
I saw you in his eyes.
No.
It wasn’t the same,
no.
"Share this story -
please.”
But -
No -
I just want need to be
rid
of when you stared wide,
when you realized my lies
were nothing -
something
for you to crawl and
run
[ into ]
and
[ hide ] .
But I saw you in his eyes
No.
They weren’t the same,
no.
They held no shame.
He never knew that we would never share a name.