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Lmao

Saul’s Mix

You make me go there, even though I don’t like to. Liked you simply, easily, and I would never spite you. You put other people on my brain. Inspire my haikus. Unlike you, I need a mode of expression. Unlike you, I can’t resort to passive aggression. Which by the way, is a massive deception, because I know you feel something. Not in a kidding myself kinda way, but in the way that I know you’re carrying something. I know you’re not that way for nothing.

#written.

Quit my job after taking these pics in the bathroom

and I cut up this jacket as well (it was a work anniversary gift)

rip DMX

youngrichnflashy

Built an apparatus of routine around you; this feeling I can’t shake. It’s just depravity now, like a reality that I can’t face. At least u got me writing again. Moving through it for my own sake. Your exit and replacement of our love is like a nightmare from which I can’t wake.

#written.

Monday.

Mondays are heavy. A sublime chaos that’s not quite chaotic enough, so it feels steady. In certain ways. When will I see you again? I can’t even count the days. The way I’d like to please you, can’t even count the ways. It’s just the way I see you. I never see you. As a result, I cannot demonstrate. This is round 3. An eye for an eye. My eyes scan your body, you look my way, then our eyes finally meet. Haven’t seen you in a few days, or has it been a week? I hope I see you soon. My wants have turned into needs. I need my time to become something you desperately seek.

#written.

knowshedoes

i dont think u love me but i could be wrong.

#written.

#SoundCloud

nervous.

Laying next to u as I write this. Your hands holding my waist as I type this. This is not love, yet; but I like this. Keeping this PG cause u might hear this later. But I don’t want to fail to mention how u fit inside of me like a key. Like I was molded for u and so were u, for me. I wanna write your name in the back of a book like I’m 16 & still a kid. U asked me if we could try again and Im glad that we did.

#written.

Table for two?

the extras.

even when you’re not around, we find ways into connection. I still feel close to u even when we’re not texting. no paragraphs to rehearse. no sexting. no love bombing. no extras. no stressing. u arrived at a time in my life where there were some really hard lessons. ones making me better for u. I feel settled with u, didn’t settle for u. but I’m settled with u. plus, sex just feels better with u. there’s no better than u. im getting off track- hold.

even when you’re away, we find ways to feel connected. the stillness in connection. im finding passion with u. my hearts protected. my phone just vibrated. let me check it. u must know im thinking of u, cause there’s your message.

#written.

date night

clingy!

u don’t know it, but u bring me a sense of security. security in that we don’t know what this is yet. this is easy in a way it’s never been, yes. on a scale of anxious to calm id give it a 10, bet. you’re soft spoken, u let me interpret things the way i need to. I used to be clingy, but with u id never need to. what u say is what u mean, its like you’re see through. and u don’t say much. I don’t have to stay up, hoping, cause u don’t ever make me wait up. u don’t use words to fill space. and we don’t argue, so we never have to make up. u don’t know it yet, but you’ve offered me something different. before I used to think I was clingy, now I know I was tripping.

#written.

7pm in Boston.

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