written by terry @writtenbyterry - Tumblr Blog

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The true mark of maturity is when somebody hurts you and you try to understand their situation instead of trying to hurt them back.

Unknown (via flowerbrain)

obamawhitehouse

This week, President Obama signed an Executive Order that prohibits federal contractors from discriminating against their employees on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity.

On Friday, join a conversation on the new Executive Order and steps the President has taken to expand opportunity for the LGBT community. Valerie Jarrett, Senior Advisor to the President, will host for a Tumblr Q&A this Friday, July 25 at 1pm ET.

Right now, you can ask your questions here on the White House Tumblr, and Valerie Jarrett will answer a bunch on Friday, July 25 at 1pm ET.

Do The Right Thing...

“Do the right thing even when other people think it may not be.

Often times when you make a decision to do the right thing, immediately you are faced with doubt. "Was that the right thing? Was that the right decision? I don't know, was that the right thing?'

You always know it's the right thing when in the end, there is peace. You are rewarded by peace in knowing that you did the right thing. The most important thing I have come to know [about success] and making the right choices is there is a price that comes with [it].

People don't always like you and they're not always happy for you and if you surround yourself with people who are not accustomed to your success they become fearful. They become scared because you are reflecting back something to them that they don't recognize.

Now, they're not gonna say 'You know... I'm very fearful because you are reflecting back to me something that I don't recognize. They're going to say, "WHO do you think you are?!"

That only happens when you are around people who do not mean, and want, and aspire to the best for you. People who want the best for you want you to be your best. So my greatest advice to you is to surround yourself with people who are going to fill your cup until your cup runneth over so when people say you're so full of yourself you can say 'yeeeeeeah'' Yes, I'm full! I'm so full my cup runneth over.

And to know that once your cup runneth over, you cannot spend your life, with your gallon sized offerings, offering them to pint size people.

You have got to surround yourself with gallon sized people. Who can hang in the same company with you so that you're not offering your gallons to those little pints out there who can't hold it anyway”

— Oprah Winfrey, 2012

sobeitjayt

writtenbyterry

loved this interview.

Respect YOUR Needs...

Because if you don't , then nobody else will..

No, that does NOT make you selfish. That makes you wise enough to know the difference.

You have to be good to yourself in order to be good to others.

Know your limits. Set boundaries. Honor your wishes. Make sure you are not lowering your standards. People who want to be in your life will rise up to meet them.

Acknowledge your needs. Notice I say NEEDS and not your wants. Wants are a luxury, a Need is a necessity.

Recognize what you NEED in order to feel full. Full of all the good things, like joy, love, peace, and light.

Once you have your needs in order, you can now request that from those you encounter.

A lot of times we either forget our needs or purposely put our needs to the side for someone else's WANTS; not even realizing that we are doing ourselves a disservice.

That is when things begin to feel unrequited.

When you dishonor your needs for others, you will begin to feel the shift that things are not mutual.

Find people who will respect YOUR needs.

I'll end this post with one of my favorite quotes by Oprah

*(yes, I'll be quoting her a lot on here because she has taught me a lot)

“..Do not spend your life, with your gallon size offerings, offering them to pint size people. Surround yourself with gallon size people who FILL you up til' your cup runneth over.”

Edit: I added the video of Oprah's 2012 Spelman Commencement Speech where she delivers the quote I wrote about above. Watch it here. INSPIRATION.

dopepenmanship

Are you also constantly tired

It’s hard finding pockets of time to breathe anymore. Write, think, Work, play, Social, family, Love, stuffed into hours that often feel wasted and like hardly enough. And as a person who’s most creative after midnight, completely resistant to mornings. And this, with no kids.

"Just drink coffee."

Understanding Impermanence..

Leave it up to Oprah to inspire my life as soon as I wake up!

On this Sunday morning just as I'm opening my eyes.. I hear the voice of Oprah on my TV screen. There's this soothing music playing in the background of her voice and so I look up to see what I am hearing.

On the TV, there's a video of a group Buddhists using sand to create what is called a 'mandala'. A painting created using colorful (dyed) sand.

The monks spend days, sometimes weeks, creating these gorgeous pieces of artwork with only their bare hands and a tool that seems to be shaving the sand precisely onto the canvas.

This is done as a spiritual task, teaching the Buddhists to focus their energy and learning to have patience in the process to complete such a daunting task.

The final result of the mandala looks like this:

After the mandala is completed, all of the sand is then immediately swept up into a pile into the center of the canvas. Becoming completely destroyed...

Wait, what?

I know that's what you're asking because that's the same thing I was thinking..

Who would spend all that time working on something just to have it erased and removed so easily?

Well, I thought that way too.. until Oprah explained..

To the Buddhists, the mandala ritual is a spiritual lesson on impermanence. It symbolizes the fact that nothing is permanent, even life itself.

No matter how beautiful something is or how hard you work to keep it, it teaches not get attached to things. It also teaches to embrace letting things go. Yes, even that beautiful mandala masterpiece that the Buddhists just spent long days working on.

It teaches to appreciate things you have while you have it because it is only temporary.

I thought this was so fascinating because how often in life do we dwell on the things that we no longer have? Myself included.

Whether it be a lost earring, or a failed relationship..

We get so worked up because we have this fear of losing. This fear of letting go.

Embracing the fact that everything is temporary can really transcend into having more peace. Removing the burden of feeling like we have to control what stays in our life.

Be passionate about the things you love and cherish them while you have it but do not fret when they are gone because they were not meant to stay.

As my mom would say: Nothing in life is set in stone.. until you die.

Just thought I'd share this piece with you guys :)

writingbox

The idea is to write it so that people hear it and it slides through the brain and goes straight to the heart.

Maya Angelou (via writingbox)

What I Learned About Love From The Jay Z and Beyoncé Concert..

"What did Bonnie and Clyde do, anyway?"

That was a legit question I overheard from the lips of a blonde, twenty-something girl as we all made our exit from the MetLife stadium on Saturday after watching the On The Run concert. Clearly, she and I had just witnessed two different shows...

As Jay and Bey impeccably showcased the essence of what Bonnie & Clyde stood for and (inevitability) died for. That "perfect" love story comes without the cliche, lovey dovey, bullshit. It ain't all roses and chocolates.

Bonnie & Clyde lived a life of crime and they were committed to each other til the end. Their unwavering love for one another made the trouble they faced along the way all worth it. This is what the 'On The Run' tour is all about.

It's not about whether or not Jay Z really cheated on Beyoncé and if that's what made Solange kick his ass in that elevator..

It's a lesson that there's no such thing as a perfect relationship, even with the Carters. You will have your good times ('Love On Top') and your bad times ('Song Cry') but in the end, love should always prevail all.

The best part of the show is when Beyoncé gives us the quote about forgiveness.

"Love is an act of endless forgiveness. Forgiveness is me giving up my right to hurt you for hurting me. Forgiveness is the final act of love"

All this while getting shot in a wedding dress. Yes, shit gets THAT real.

We've all been there for before where we wanted to hurt the one we love because they hurt us. Why? Because no one can hurt you more than the ones you care for. They know you best and you feel so vulnerable to them.

It is a valuable lesson to be learned here. In order to sustain love, you have continuously BE love. You have to be willing to love through thick AND thin. It's easy to stop loving once you've been hurt but as the late Maya Angelou once said, "Have enough courage to trust love one more time, and always one more time."

If two people can put aside their ego and realize that mistakes will be made; and know that nothing worth having will come without HARD work to keep it, you can really have that ever lasting love you seek.

At one point in the show, Jay asks the crowd to "light up the sky" with their cell phones. In that moment as I looked around the packed stadium, I realized that I was witnessing over 80,000 people experience what love really is.

Even if some people (yes, I'm talking to you, twenty-something blonde girl) may have missed it.

For that, I thank you, Mr. and Mrs. Carter.

lifehacks247

Do Something That Scares You..

On December 7th, 2012 I went in for an interview for an internship with VIBE Magazine. I remember getting lost in Manhattan and walking around for 30 minutes straight asking strangers for directions so that I could get to my interview on time. Thank God I left my house early!

Just 2 weeks before my interview, I had quit my job working at a dreadful clothing store and I told myself that if I quit, the next job I landed had to be something I was passionate about. It felt like everything was riding on this opportunity.

I remember my heart was thumping so fast I could feel it in my stomach as I walked into this fancy office. In my head, I kept repeating 'Keep calm, Terry. What would Oprah do?' (... No, seriously..) When it was time for my interview, I remember sitting on a couch across from these two female editors who were staring at me and I told myself "just be yourself." Whatever imperfections I had, they would ever love me for it or hate me for it.

I'm proud to say this August makes a year since I got hired as a freelance writer for the company and I know I never would have gotten this far if I allowed my fear of being unqualified for the position stop me.

The scariest part about life is the unpredictability of it all. You never know what tomorrow will bring. You never know what can happen within the next hour, minute or second. But that is also what makes life so fascinating. Each day you have the chance to create amazing memories if you take the risk of getting out of your comfort zone.

I say all that to say this: if you wanna cut all of your hair off, then chop, chop! Get to cutting! That "Gaht-damn-you-fine" ass crush you've been too afraid to tell how you really feel, tell them! Join that yoga class you've been wanting to join for the longest. Try new foods. Apply for that job you think you're not qualified enough for. And if you've ever wanted to strip down and run naked around the block..... yeah, you probably shouldn't do that because it's illegal, but you get my point. LOL!

All of the things that you've convinced yourself that you cannot do because you're secretly afraid to do is only going to leave you with a pile of what if's in the long run.

Life is a gamble.

You can't be afraid to fail. You can't be afraid to make a fool of yourself. Humility is a human trait we all should learn to embrace. Free yourself from the burdens of perfection. Be silly. Do something that makes you happy but might make others uncomfortable. Screw them.

"There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing." — Aristotle

This life is yours. Make it worth living!

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written by terry