⛵(Po)beda⛵

Inaccurate quotes from Wrongeliad characters

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Juliko Bandito: Help me, I'm bleeding! Try to put pressure on him!

De La Voro: Vaffanculo, bleeding, otherwise I'll kick your didietro!

Juliko Bandito: You're pressure too hard.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Fuchs: What is love?

Lom: The reason the world turns!

Archibald Dandy: A delusional chemical reaction in the brain that causes people, like animals, to reproduce. so get this nonsense out of your brain and do something more useful.

Gangsters: 🎵Baby, don't hurt me, don't hurt me, don't more...🎵

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Fuchs: Most of all for breakfast I like to eat cheesecakes with jam, pancakes, scrambled eggs, omelette, oatmeal porridge, toast with ham...

Archibald Dandy: I like a cigarette.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Archibald Dandy: The first minutes of the morning are the best.

Gangsters: Hello, Chief.

Archibald Dandy: The minutes are over.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

De La Voro: The computer monitor doesn't show pictures, no matter how I tap on it.

Archibald Dandy: It's a technique, you have to use your head here.

De La Voro: I tried with my head, it hurts more.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

De La Voro Gangsterito: The boss had a nervous breakdown, so I decided to visit him in a mental hospital.

Juliko Bandito: How did you get around the guards?

De La Voro Gangsterito: They mistook me for one of their own.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Archibald Dandy: Don't worry, I still have a couple of knives up my sleeve!

Fuchs: Maybe you meant "cards"?

Archibald Dandy: No.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Lom: What is your biggest fear?

Fuchs: Well... Probably arachnophobia

Lom: You don't want the spiders to get married?

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

(gangsters tell each other jokes)

De La Voro, Giulico Banditto: Do you know how our Boss differs from a donkey?

Archibald, putting his hand on De La Voore's shoulder: With what?

De La Voro, stammering: Nothing...

Archibald: Well, that's it

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

(De La Voro runs into the bar)

De La Voro, to the bartender: pour it quickly before it starts!

(the bartender pours him, De la Voro drinks)

De La Voro: Come on, pour it even faster before it starts!

(the bartender pours him another drink, De La voro drinks it again)

De La Voro: Come on, pour it even faster, or it'll start!

The bartender: Listen, are you going to pay?

De La Voro: Well, it's fucking starting.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

*3 a.m.*

Archibald, Fuchs: I would kill for you.

Archibald: If you want, ask someone to kill him for you

Fuchs:

Fuchs: Archie, honey, go back to sleep.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Fuchs: One day I called my mom and asked her to give me $5, to which she replied to me so that I could find a job.

Lom: Well, actually she was right.

Fuchs: I was 4 years old.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Archibald: There's a fine line between bravery and stupidity, and I think you've crossed it.

Fuchs: Do you think I'm brave?

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Archibald Dandy, about Fuchs: he said yes!

Juliko Bandito: What was the question?

Archibald Dandy: ...Will you marry me?

Juliko Bandito: Wtf, no

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Archibald Dandy: Well, we're finally on a date, what would you like to do?

Fuchs: ...

Archibald Dandy: Oh, does the atmosphere seem unfriendly to you? Well, I can put on some music.

Fuchs: ...

Archibald Dandy: So what do you want?

Fuchs: First of all, untie me.

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

De La voro: There are three ways to do something: right, wrong, and how Julico would do it.

Archibald Dandy: It seems to me that it is wrong and how Juliko would do it is the same thing.

De La Voro: Yes, but the latter is faster!

[wrongelheardsomewhere]

Lom: Fuchs, are you crying?

Fuchs: It's okay, I'm just chopping onions.

Lom: ...

Lom: But these are potatoes...

Fuchs: Leave me alone.