STACEY EVANS

[xostaceyevans]

[xostaceyevans]

Time was ticking, his own paranoia bubbling, and Stacey just wouldn’t shut up. If he didn’t get her off his back soon, he might actually be screwed if he lets this go on. He felt his eye twitch as the cheerleader ranted and let out a groan in frustration. “Jesus christ, what do I have to do to get you out of here for just five minutes, huh? ” he asked, finally letting his annoyance boiling over his usual uncaring demeanor. “I just need to pass on these pills then you fuck, blow, or trade wine coolers or whatever the hell you’re buying off one of these super seniors. I really could not give less of a shit but in case you’re new to this dealing is a private matter and you’re the last person some tweaked out sophomore wants to see.”

Stacey had an insult ready to lash out into the space between them; she could feel the sharp ache of venom building in her chest - but the mention of a tweaked out sophomore had the cheerleader stopping her words before they could make it past her vocal chords. Nothing more than a strained sort of whimper falling from her lips as the air in her lungs seeming to leave her being all at once. Freakin’, freakin’ fuck. “I - I thought you sold weed.” Was all the blonde seemed to be able to say after a few, long moments of silence between them. Every ounce of frustration that had built up within her making itself known in her jilted syllables, and the way that her hands shook. Desperation cracking through her perfectly curated surface as walking away and rescheduling became a non freakin’ option. What was she supposed to do? Play nice? Play dumb? Threaten the one freakin’ guy at McKinley that seemed to have exactly what she needed?  “Since when are you in the business of freakin’ study aids? Have to be honest, I was expecting way less Rebel Without a Cause, and way more... Mathlete looking for pocket change.” Playing it cool - one way to go. She just hoped he let her get the hell away with it. 

[xostaceyevans]

I’m sorry, I’m lost on the part where you’re the only student at McKinley… No matter. I can make sure you have some representation on the layout once I double check what’s going on. Though, I would like to remind you that being nice to those on the Yearbook staff, does you get you better pictures on the actual pages. Just saying. 

Oh, if they wanna come in, that’s totally fine! I love meeting parents! I’m not afraid of you, and I’m not afraid of your mommy and daddy. I was raised by a dentist and a hippie. Literally, nothing scares me. 

Only student at McKinley, no, but it’d be, like, a total untruth to say that my brother and I aren’t two of the more photogenic students at this school... And skipping any opportunity to put us front and center? I just don’t think it’d be doing the yearbook any favors. Besides, I’m totes nice to those on the yearbook staff -- Mira is basically the love of my life, and Tommy is my best friend. I just didn’t think using my totally awesome connections had very much merit in it when I could come to the woman in charge herself. Just saying. 

Oh, well, nobody is afraid of Daddy; he’s basically one of those oversized teddy bears you buy at Costco. And while I totes respect the horrors of your childhood... I’d rather not deal with Mary Evans in the halls at McKinley. It might be just enough motivation to find something that really does scare you... you know? 

[xostaceyevans]

TEXT 📲  tosha ⟺ stacey

TOSHA: what can i say? i'm just a generous person

TOSHA: girl, i gottchu. beerpong is being set up downstairs but i hope you're going to get drunk of more than beer bitch. i'm making jello shots 😜

STACEY: legit more generous than i could ever manage to be to the population of mckinley. i would never let these heathens into my freakin' house. tommy's parents house, however...like whole diff story

STACEY: oh, beer pong isn't to get drunk - duh. it's just, like, totes fun and i have to defend my title at all freakin' costs. tommy basically drinks all of my cups for me anyway. jello shots i can get freakin' down with tho, omg. i can already tell the hangover is going to be so worth it

[xostaceyevans]

hqcohenchang‌:

Alright kiddos, here’s the deal. Seniors, you need to start thinking about what baby pictures you want included in the yearbook for the collage. I’ve already sent emails to all parents, so they should already be picking things out. You also need to have your senior picture to me before April 15th. This is a hard deadline. If it’s not to me, then it’s not in the yearbook. Remember, it needs to have a black background. We will be voting on class superlatives within the next few weeks so keep an eye out for that, as well. 

If you have any questions, feel free to reach out. If you don’t know where my room is by now…

Ugh, when you’re done mentioning a million things that, like, totally don’t apply to me - can we please talk about the freakin’ Cheerios layout? For, like, a second? Because while I’m totes aware that we’re not team captain yet, there seems to be a criminal lack of Stacey and Stevie Evans in the layouts my sources have been sending me.

I totally hate letting my parents know about little issues hat I can totes solve myself, so... Maybe we can work it before Mama Evans eventually finds out and comes to, like, totally knock your door. Trust me - it’s probably in both of our best interest. 

[xostaceyevans]

You’re right. You’re always a proper pain in my ass, so naturally you’ll be even more of one whenever it comes to alcohol. It’s right on par, and I dig it. But I am glad you’re seeing the light with this. Drunk is drunk is drunk and you’ll be pleased to know… I am adding some recipes to my memory that will absolutely have the Stacey seal of approval. See, I’m always having you on the brain. Drunk is drunk is drunk but a happy Stacey drunk is the best kind. I think they lost their ability to think up us doing something scandalous after they realized no matter how many times they surprise checked in on us, we were still only just cuddling. So I think we might be set for life. He’d be stupid not to, Stace. I might beat some fuckin’ sense into him if he denies you a showmance like that. No one upsets Stacey Evans if I have a say in it.

Oh my ‘lanta, is this real life? Did you… did you just say the fuck word? I need to get you riled up like this more, Gwen Stacey, because that was top ten best moments of my life. Honestly, I’m proud of myself, but I’m more proud of you. Good for you. But you’re right, I guess. I mean Delilah is the main Heather of the literal musical called Heathers so that’s at least a little bit of the main character. But I’ll bend and call you the full blown, mega macho main ass character if it’s going to make your eyebrow stop doing that little twitch thing. Jesus Christ. I’ll leave my ‘screwing of theater nerds’ to a minimum for you. Just one for the season and that’s it. Deal?

Well, you know I just, like, live for being a pain in your ass, Tom-Tom. And we’ll see about that Stacey seal of approval... as long as you’re bringing me a bottle hard liquor to chase whatever pinterest fail you make me taste test. You’re totally right - with as stupid as your parents have been lately at least they seem to be able to , like, get it through their freakin’ heads that we’re just friends... Unlike the rest of the population of Lima. - Wait, are you saying that you’re available to beat up boys into dating me? Because that’s, like, a major freakin’ friendship perk if I ever heard one. 

Ugh, seriously, Tommy? Oh my ‘lanta? Where the hell do you pick this kind of stuff up? I said it once, and I’ll say it again - “fuck off” about it. Fine, Delilah is the main Heather, but I’m the main bitch on and off stage, and I'm not sure why you’re pretending not to freakin’ know it. God, what the hell is wrong with your regular pool of horny idiots? Finally getting bored with girls who can’t spell their own freakin’ names? Can’t you just leave the freakin’ theater nerds alone? Believe it or not, Delilah is actually a nice girl. She doesn’t deserve to get screwed around with, even if it’s with someone as hot as you, O’Dell.

[xostaceyevans]

𝖒𝖎𝖗𝖆 & 𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖈𝖊𝖞 !

Look babe, you know you’re hot, I know you’re hot, the entire fuckin’ population of Lima thinks you’re hot and I know that uniform is doing favors for you but imagine if you got to wear something other than red for once. How do you even keep that uniform clean? Do you clean it every night? Or is everyone just wearing the same dirty uniform every day? Cause that’s kinda gross. Pink? Dear god, the most I’d wear is maybe navy but that’s where I draw the line.

Do you really think it’s an act? Dude has issues, we all do, he’s just more open about his self-loathing. But c’mon you know he hates being called Mason and honestly if he heard that, I don’t think he’s scared to hit a girl. Pinky promise, I’ll stay loyal but like I said, you have to be on your best behavior too. Don’t provoke anything.

...Why would I want to wear something other than red? Are you saying I don’t look good in red, Mimi? Because if you’re saying I don’t look good in red, then you’re saying I don’t look good in, like, anything I own - and that means I’m going to have to do some serious freakin’ rethinking on the state of my stupid closet. Um, total ew? I have more than one uniform, and I do laundry three times a week -  I’m not a freakin’ heathen. 

Fine, I guess I can’t freakin’ fault him for having stupid feelings. But I don’t exactly like the names he calls me either - just for the record. He might not be scared to hit a girl, but I’m not scared to freakin’ kill him either. Best behavior tonight though - totally swear on my pom poms. 

[xostaceyevans]

“Alright, princess. Lets see you put your money where your mouth is. That’ll be $300 upfront. A hundred being for the deposit and another hundred for the next refill you’ll be costing me with this bullshit.” He countered, his aggravation with the cheerleader getting higher with every second passing. Even though he could fight Stacey all day, he really needed to get going. “That’s funny. You can meet the teacher you’re blowing after school. I actually have real business to handle. My clientele aren’t exactly the type to be scared of a girl in a tight skirt so maybe it’s actually in your best interest to just run along already. For your sake.”

“How about I give you $300 to turn the other way every time you see my face in the halls from now until... you know, freakin’ eternity? At least then I can call it money well spent.” Stacey just shrugged her shoulders in the face of Vinny’s growing aggravation; unphased by the way the tension seemed to intrude on her space without either of them moving a muscle. It was her favorite game, if she she was being completely freakin’ honest - even if Vinny was far from her favorite opponent. “Oh, how original - I’m a hot cheerleader so I must be sleeping with a grown freakin’ man, right? Like, total ew, Darko. Besides, who the hell are your clientele? We go to a freakin’ arts school. Excuse me if I’m not totally frightened by Shakespeare freaks, and Andy Warhol wannabes.” 

Stacey just rolled her eyes, but she couldn’t help the way her whole being seemed to lash out toward Vinny in the span of second. Wholly impatient and out of energy she needed to deal with being told to get lost without the trusty help from the pills she was so desperately trying to get her hands on. “Selling weed isn’t real business, alright? Some of us have actual things to buy, and if you get in the way of that because you want to play your stupid little games today - I’ll freakin’ kill you Hart. Alright?”

[xostaceyevans]

STACEY EVANS & TOMMY O’DELL PICKLES : 

“You and me - that’s all that matters, right?” 

@tommyoisms

[xostaceyevans]

𝖒𝖎𝖗𝖆 & 𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖈𝖊𝖞 !

Do not disrespect Lydia fucking Deetz, Stace. She is my national icon and if I want to dress like I stepped out of a Tim Burton film, let me. It adds some character compared to that damn uniform you guys have to wear every day and who knows? Maybe in a few years, alt fashion’ll be in.

Hey, M-card, totally not cool princess. But you gotta admit, Tommy boy fits right in, he may be our idiot but he turns into a horndog just like Brooks. Fine, as long as you’re civil I can get him to be civil. Maybe. And if he’s not, he’ll get the boot.

Are you trying to say this uniform doesn’t look like a freakin’ dream on me? Because I love you, Mimi, but I’m going to have to call, like, major bull on that front. Red is so my color, and this skirt is so doing me every favor in the book. Fine, though - live your totes Tim Burton-esque life. I’ll just wait until my birthday and wish extra hard that you’ll show up to my party in something pink.  

Ugh, but whhhy? Does Brooks really need his little broody boy quirks to feel special? Total yawn. Compared to James Dean, Tommy is basically an angel - at least he doesn’t try to put on some Rebel Without A Cause act. But as long as you’re actually going to keep an eye on your pet, I guess I can give him another chance. Just promise me you’re not going to go hopping over on to his side the second he gets that stupid ‘Woe is Me’ look on his face. I can’t freakin’ compete with the whole emo boy thing and it’s so not fair.

[xostaceyevans]

See? That’s all that matters. It’s not like we’re in the position to be super picky about the alcohol we get. We just gotta power on through and deal with it. The drunk level is all that matters and Falcon punch? Is good for that. You remember that the next time you have to slam back a handful of White Claws to feel the soothing feeling of nothingness whenever it comes to being drunk. Although I’ll try to score some good stuff for the after party. All for my best girl.

Once or twice, but it’s always nice to hear. Jaxon would be a fuckin’ idiot to not sneak you home, but you know I’m always going to let you share a bed with me instead. Besides, you can loudly walk through the front door with me - my parents stopped caring about our sleepovers a long ass time ago. And you, shut up. Maybe I’ve been fucking loads of girls but just keeping it to myself. You like, don’t have to know everyone I’m sticking my dick in, right? But I’ll make sure to get a real stage five clinger soon so that you can have your daily entertainment back. Better than Netflix. Maybe I’ll for Delilah, she’s a good girl so I’m sure she can get a little clingy and insecure. Fuck, she’s even the lead in the musical so that’ll look good too.

Oh, come on, Tom-Tom! Like, who even am I if I can’t be picky about the alcohol you’re providing? But I guess you have a point. Drunk is drunk is drunk. I’d just, like, so much rather slam a case White Claws than ever have to swallow another spoonful of the rum and koolaid concoction you weirdos call ‘punch.’  What? They don’t think we could get up to anything scandalous? There has to be some way to take advantage of that, right? You’re the best, and you’re so not wrong. If Jax doesn’t take me straight for the home run on opening night, it’s, like, basically a lost cause anyway. Some freakin’ showmance. 

Okay, how about we back up to the part where you told me to shut up, and work our way through from there? For one - Delilah is not the freakin’ lead of the musical. I don’t care if she plays the first Heather to bite it, I’m Veronica, and the show is mine. Two - since when are you keeping secrets about anything, let alone the idiot freakin’ girls you’re taking to bed? What are you, like, working your way through all of the theater nerds, or just Delilah? Because I’d rather you and your dick not fuck up the little progress I’ve made in getting those losers not to treat me like the freakin’ antichrist. 

[xostaceyevans]

“The hair gel is turning the freaking frogs gay! That’s science, you can’t deny that.” Stevie joked. On the topic of the gossip blog, he couldn’t help but admit his guilt in falling into the ‘who’s dating who’ drama of Lima. “Too late, I’m the one driving this wagon all the way to shipperville, Stace Face.” 

And he was right about it, too. He makes one joke about the most heterosexual guy in the school, and Stacey’s flipping the lid at the idea of a Tevie romance? Girl was in deep. “I was kidding, obvi. Tommy is not my type.” Mostly because he’s not a tiny Latino small time drug-slash-fake I.D. dealer with the eyes of a husky and a kiss that takes my breath away, but you don’t need to know that quite yet, do you Stace? Now or ever. 

“As your brother, and not only that, your gay brother, it is my duty - and my honor - to know your heart better than you do. I mean, you said it yourself, right? You plan on bullying any girl he brings to the party, just promise not to Carrie the clueless broad, and you’re ‘excited to see Tommy in his underwear’? Come oooonnn! Plus I did your natal chart, and it totally says you’re soulmates, so-” He gave a shrug. “The stars don’t lie.” As he finished his monologue, he slid back onto Stacey’s bed, fully committed to not doing any more homework for the rest of the night, and stirring the pot with his sister instead. 

Stacey hated herself for admitting it, even if it was just to herself; but hearing Stevie confirm that Tommy wasn’t his type - even if she freakin’ knew it - brought some sort of ease to the nerves that were prickling beneath her skin. Still, it didn’t keep the blonde from narrowing her eyes even further toward her twin brother. Anxiety, and - what the hell was she supposed to call it? Pure repressed energy? - pulsing through her veins as he poked and prodded at her feelings, just like he had a thousand times before...but it was different this time. Like Stevie had struck a nerve raw in one fell swoop, without even really having to try.  She didn’t know if it was the near constant questioning from that stupid gossip blog that had her so on edge, or maybe the tension that seemed to have been building between her and her best friend since Tommy’s solo at Regionals. But either way, it was only a moment before Stacey could feel her patience snapping just as cleanly as the pencil that was stuck in her vice grip. Both broken ends sailing across the space toward her brother with a toss as she stood at her desk suddenly enough to threaten her chair’s balance. “As my gay brother, you should know that the term ‘clueless broad’ is so freakin’ Chicago, it’s, like, almost embarrassing to hear you say it.” Stacey practically bit the words at him; sharp gaze cutting through the tension radiating off of her being. “Not to mention - freakin’ natal charts, Stevie? Like, literally gag me. What’s next? Pagan freakin’ rituals to summon the perfect man so you don’t have to, like, kiss pictures of --Ben Splatt before you go to bed at night?” 

“Just because you wish could be all over a guy like Tommy doesn’t freakin’ mean I want to be. He’s my best friend,” Understatement of the year, “And believe it or not, I’d like to keep him that way. Stanford is our future, Stevie,” Stacey raised an eyebrow toward her brother, almost like she might be testing him. Eyes observing him - just like they  always were - while Stacey did everything she could to ignore the way her muscles tensed beneath the weight of her own words. To ignore the way it felt like she was lying, even to herself. “And we can’t afford any freakin’ distractions - especially not with stupid relationships.”

[xostaceyevans]

TEXT 📲  tosha ⟺ stacey

TOSHA : Party @ my place this Friday bitches

TOSHA: BYOB. Upstairs isn't my place but everything else is fair game. Smoke outside don't be ghetto.

STACEY: ugh, thank freakin' god. I was like seriously starting to think that this was actually going to be my third weekend in a row stuck at home because EVERYONE in Lima is too freakin' lame to provide entertainment

STACEY: I'll totes bring my own bottle, but i DO hope you know it's a hosts duty to provide cups and a suitable table for beer pong. it's like McKinley tradition, after all

[xostaceyevans]

STACEY FREAKIN’ EVANS :  

“ There are only, like, two types of people in this world, okay? People who wish they were me - and people who are lying to themselves. ”

[xostaceyevans]

Vinny just stared up at the cheerleader as she ranted at him. Only partly drowning her out as he couldn’t help but think how similar she and Stevie got when they were upset. It was kind of creepy. He snapped back into the conversation in confusion when she implied any type of feelings. Vinny actually couldn’t help but laugh, “Trust me, princess, you aren’t my type. I much prefer brunettes.” he said rolling his eyes then checking his phone to see that he should have his buyer coming by soon. He looked around to see that no one was around and stood back up, getting a step closer to Stacey and lowering his voice. “I’m not sure you can afford to buy off a long term customer. That being said, you might want to just run back to your herd, Stace. They may start thinking you’re here to buy… or worse, that you’re actually in love with me.”

The sound of Vinny’s laugh just had Stacey wincing at the sound, frustration bubbling through every inch of her veins as she rolled her eyes right back at him. She was almost considering turning right back around on her heel - giving up for the sake of her own freakin’ sanity - but it was only a moment later that Vinny was pushing himself back onto his feet. The cheerleader’s curiosity piqued enough to take her own confident step toward him; closing the gap until she could practically feel the tension buzzing between them. “And I’m sure you know, like, next to nothing about what I can afford, Darko,” Stacey just narrowed her eyes, voice lowering nearly to the same octave as his in their stand off. “But I know for damn sure that my friends would be more likely to believe I would be taking Zack the Crack to bed before I ever even thought about touching Hart the Art Heaux. Besides, I’m not here for your freakin’ brick weed, alright? I’m here to meet someone - you know, unless they see you and decide to run the other freakin’ direction. God knows it’s all I want to do whenever I have the honor of having to acknowledge your existence.” 

[xostaceyevans]

I’m sorry, but Falcon punch is not icky. I won’t make you drink it but I refuse to hear your weird slander against it. I just need to keep Mommy-Tommy jokes off my fuckin’ radar. You got it, Gwen Stacey. Nothing but enough shots to make your head thump in the morning because of it. We can make it a sloppy to night to celebrate your everything-but-sloppy performance. 

Right yeah of course. We’ll make sure you’re completely ready for… all of that.

You should be sorry, because Falcon Punch is basically a crime against humanity, Tom-Tom - like, even worse than that green apple vodka we stole out of your Mom’s liquor cabinet on the Fourth of July, and I still can’t get that taste out of my mouth. I’ll never understand how you footballers can drink that poison, but as long as I get enough tequila to fuel an MTV spring break consider me, like, the happiest camper in Lame-O Little Lima. Bring on the freakin’ hangover, because I’m so ready to party. There’s nothing better than a sloppy night with my best guy, right? 

Have I ever told you you’re the best wing man, like, ever? Though, on the off chance Jax doesn’t totally want to sneak me home with him - you don’t mind if I sleep at your place, right? I mean, unless you’re finally planning on taking some girl home with you again. God knows it’s been forever and a half since you’ve let some idiot onto the Tommy Train. Can you believe I’m, like, almost starting to miss those fun little ‘back off my man’ convos your conquests are always trying to drag me into? Your lack of game is seriously cutting into my day to day entertainment.

[xostaceyevans]

“There’s nothing wrong with that, wanting to excel in what you love to prove you’re the best. To show others you’re top dog as some would say. I get it” Rachel shrugged and glanced at the younger girl. “Just having an off day, can’t really put my finger on it if I’m being honest. Though how is cheerleading going this season Stacey?”

“Well, I have to admit that it’s a total breath of fresh air not to hear someone to tell me to calm the hell down about it for once. I’m the freakin’ best, like, why shouldn’t I say it?” Stacey just shrugged - nearly answering her own question - as she swept her gaze across the empty choir room. Stepping a little further into the room almost like she wasn’t sure if she should be hanging around. “Well, it’s totes easy to run into off days at McKinley, so I can’t say I’m shocked to hear it? But cheerleading is, like, freakin’ fantastic this season. There’s a certain blonde who just joined the squad who’s basically trying to steal my life, but what can I say? It comes with the territory, I guess.”