Undisguised

...Real rare inmost content of miaow heart and mind...

[xromiaow]

Never say "never again"

I thought I was grown up and mature enough to finish with on-screen crushes many years ago... And it took me time... all (10 by that moment) Chicago Fire seasons and, after a long break and hesitation whether to start a spin-off, only in the middle of the third season of Chicago PD I finally came to really notice this guy... "hm, that shoulder holster is so sexy on him..." a second later checking myself in shock with the same words he said in the scene on the last photo, "What the hell?!" ...Because he's not my type... But holy damn, he's so fine inside and out I wasn't able to resist... and eventually fell in love... so comfortable like never before. ...Inspired anew to write philosophical stuff, lovely shorts and fairy stories. So today Antonio Dawson turns to represent the perfect image of a man for me and provides the same kind of fancied relationships... Amen.

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HOLY CATS!!!

❤️❤️❤️ Is it for real? The man can sing... 🥰

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John & Lena ❤️

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NO WORDS NEEDED

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The oddest fluff I never expected myself to write...

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In 2x16, when Antonio had to go undercover... Gosh, it's such a special episode regarding his character.

There he's so damn cool, almost to perfection! And just like a duck to a water. Less formalities and morals to restrain him.

Don't know who's enjoying it better, Antonio or Jon Seda himself... being more of a bad guy... a good bad guy.

Aw, and that cute hat on his head... )))

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Beaten or not, one can't resist...

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Tough. Cool. And a heartbreaker. That's a given!

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And again... referring to the latest post...

How my character would handle the situation with a wicked ex-wife of her man...

No, not like this... )))

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Going on with my previous thoughts...

When his ex-wife came to the fire station for Diego and "made a scene embarrassing her", no, it's actually Sylvie made a scene later "why you didn't text me to warn me she's coming..."

Seriously, can't she handle another woman? She feels so little? Ashamed when doing nothing wrong? Though, yes, Antonio's right - she perfectly knew what she was getting into... But then she said he wasn't ready for all that... What that fuck?!? And after it's he who came to apologize. And he had the same real reasons (not excuses) as in the very beginning why they can't be together right now what she originally ignored thinking she'd manage...

Because all she was led by, despite her "outside cute innocence", is a lech (their second "no-strings-attached" try does prove that). For mere fun she was pretty initiative to come up to him at Molly's and to knock at his door in only underwear under her coat. When he was so serious to invite her to his parents anniversary. But once some troubles appear, she blames him or someone else and resigns, never fighting for him and for them...

Young, she's simply young for a man with "baggage"... Only years after she matured enough to paradoxically end up married to someone exactly like that... but that wasn't Antonio...

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As I said I noticed Antonio very belatedly... )))

But long before that happened I clearly remember one moment in Chicago Fire which stroke me like a lightning...

The way he looked at Sylvie in the ambulance car - holy Mother! I felt... hm, jealous... meaning it as a nice thing - "what a lucky girl!"... never realizing that my reaction also could refer to the guy himself but not merely his gaze...

Anyway, I instantly sensed something definite going to occur between these two. I paused that episode and ran to youtube to check and see delightful spoilers in fan videos - how I always do with favorite couples.

I was so pleased... and then frustrated as found out they'd be together for not that long and she'd prefer someone else... What a silly girl!! They had such a chemistry - sooo rare thing between characters!

Yet, someone said he's too old for her... Grrrrr! My angry dislike! I say she's simply too young... Was afraid to be hurt since they felt incredibly good and were great together and so... she just walked away... twice... I don't fucking get it! A sane woman would never let a man like him go.

Still... surely, there are more videos with their couple than with Antonio alone. So thanks for that brettonio loveliness at least.

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A treat for the senses

The last 11th season of Chicago PD is totally different. As if made on another camera and shot in some other narrative style... And all I could think about while watching it is how Antonio would look in these new "circumstances"... 

He's missed... He's the loveliest part of the show and that's not 'cause I have a thing for him... It's due to charisma, spirit and sensate nature of his persona (much of that contributed by Jon Seda himself, I guess) shining through the toughness of the character. And, aw, his smile - so shamefully rare but so sinfully priceless. If they have him back - that's the main wish to Santa, a genie or whoever  - I know he will be older... and I think I can live with that... Because neither years nor scenarists can take away his inner light and flame. I'll put here some nice fan videos. Sadly and unbelievably, there's only a couple cool of him. The first one though from Chicago Fire.

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Indispensable

From time to time I rewind old episodes and fan-videos to keep his image in my mind alive. So back to the very beginning of season 6... I so fucking want to fucking punch fucking Adam... and to hug Antonio... Though he's always huggable, clinggable, snuggleable, etc ))) But in that season he's obviously and terribly lonely just more than ever. He desperately needs someone. A lifebuoy. Thrown not by Voight - but thanks at least for that. Having lost so much, he held on for too long with no true intimate exclusive support - a woman shoulder, understanding, comforting, inspiring... Thus his breaking was inevitable... making you cry... making you ache to do anything for him without any condemnation. He should have been saved as the worthiest person he is and kept as an essential part of the team. Because Voight can't handle those constantly screwing up kids on his own authority. There are three indispensable legs of that department: Voight, Antonio and Platt... Undoubtedly, without Antonio Dawson Chicago PD and their unit is not at all the same, it's falling apart piece by piece. So... Finish the series... or just better BRING HIM BACK!!!

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LYRICS

My personal verses to replace original in someone's existent songs in which I liked the music but was inspired to tell my own story on it...