yearnstarved. selective rp blog. multimuse. a mix of canon + original characters. / an exploration of the promise of mutual destruction of love in all its forms + the collection of heartbeats as a constellation + codependency as a way for the living to haunt one another + the liminal space between the finger tips reaching out for each other.
─── ⋆ MUSE ROSTER under the cut!
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"the meeting in a dream" by jorge luis borges / doctor who "hell bent" (2015) / cassandra clare, city of bones / "hands 2 of 2" by chris schoonover / fleur jaeggy (tr. by gini alhadeff) "i am the brother of XX: stories" / doctor who "dark waters" (2014)
CANON CHARACTERS
BECKETT MARINER. lower decks canon. mariner doesn’t always believe in orders but she believes in the mission. where she was once wide-eyed with love for starfleet, serving in the dominion war left her jaded and rebellious. she finds her way into personal achievements as often as she sabotages them in favor of staying an ensign.
CLARA OSWALD. doctor who canon. Living in between one heartbeat and her last, Clara no longer travels with the Doctor. She possess a ship that can sail through time and space in the disguise of a 50’s diner. Though she’s a figment frozen in time, death has not been beaten yet. Merely cheated.
VERSES AVAILABLE | view all
Grey’s Anatomy / Hollywood / Star Trek / 9-1-1
ORPHEUS OF THRACE. hadestown canon. His voice was fated to sing of tragedies, including his own. Success and joy are not guaranteed to any mortal. Yet Orpheus tries. He hopes. Through his failures and attempts, he is heroized for his gift to see the world for what it could be in spite of how it is.
VERSES AVAILABLE | view all
Fantasy (d&d) / Vampires
ZED NECRODOPOLIS. zombies canon. the spark in the dark. zed is a 2nd generation zombie who grew up during the great seabrook divide. he currently resides on the campus of mountain college on a football scholarship. he faces obstacles with being part of the monster pilot program while failing to live up to his “exceptional” reputation. / SHIP EXCLUSIVE with Cheerfreaks
ORIGINAL CHARACTERS
VESTIR KANO. star wars OC. / BIOGRAPHY. old republic based mostly but has an incarnation in every era. Generally an abrasive person who spends every lifetime pissing people off and doing something illegal. not open to shipping.
VERSES AVAILABLE
Cobra Kai
CHANG'E. chinese deity adaptation. chang'e’s fate was rotten from birth despite being blessed with great beauty. after stealing pills of immortality, she finally escaped her destiny of being hou yi’s wife. she ascended to the sky where she snuck into the heavenly queen mother’s palace. for her crime, she was exiled to the moon.
VERSES AVAILABLE | view all
One Piece / Doctor Who
ELLY TRAN. paranormal oc. / BIOGRAPHY. elly learned how to disappear before she lost her life. she apologized for existing and analyzed the room before even stepping inside. for a girl who didn't know how to live, her existence was turned upside down when tragedy struck and she became a ghost.
VERSES AVAILABLE
SCHOOL SPIRITS AU / Cobra Kai / ZOMBIES
SECRET MENU (characters I have no/fewer AUs for)
MEG MASTERS (supernatural) / LADY SIF (marvel) / KATHANI SHARMA (bridgerton) / IRIS WEST (the flash) / MAE-HO ANISEYA (star wars: acolyte) / MATT BEALE (school spirits OC) / NEFERTARI VIVI (one piece) / JADE RABBIT (chinese myth OC) / PETER B. PARKER (spiderverse) / PRINCESS MORBUCKS (PPG) / SAM ALEXANDER (marvel) / SIMON ELROY (school spirits)
hey friends, for the time being, i'm not sure if i'll come back to this blog. maybe in the future i will but if you have my discord, you can find me there
"Been ready, I think," she says, with a last glance at the dispersing cop cars. "Why, got any post-fight rituals?" she asks, amused.
"Normally I just go home." Provided she wasn't interrupted on the way to somewhere else. "But I don't really feel like making the flight yet, so if you have somewhere in mind..."
PRINCESS TUCKS HER HANDS into her pockets, proud for navigating an interaction without rubbing someone the wrong way... yet. Although her intuitions tell her that her new acquaintance isn't the kind to get her feathers ruffled easily. "I know a truck that makes kickass tostadas," she motioned her head in the direction.
KIMMY CAN’T HELP BUT SMILE. It’s wide smile, full of pride as she watches her friend experience the adrenaline in the aftermath of an impulsive and risky decision. “I wouldn’t have thought that,” she admits, shrugging half-heartedly. Maybe she would have thought Elly a bit of a prude, but there’s nothing wrong with that. Kimberly certainly won’t voice this opinion. “But I’m glad you agreed. It was a bit cathartic for me, too.”
ELLY EASES UP A TOUCH. With how blunt Kimmy's reputation makes her out to be, Elly expected to something worse in response. In the time she's gotten to know Kimmy, Elly's carved out a more accurate mental image of her. Every time she pulls up that image now, she'll only think of the excitement Kimmy brings and the laughs between them as they hauled ass after the egging.
"For you too? Oh, I'm sorry. I've been so focused on myself. What's been bothering you?"
Terra nodded with relief, hearing that indeed, more than one dream was fine. And hers were little ones, like decorations on a cake.
She really needed to stop thinking about sweets.
"Yes, that is what I'm learning! I'd like to also learn how to fly all the time, and... I want to see big cities and fountains. And I want to fall in love, like in the books, if I can. And have a house. And some day I want to see fireworks."
Things she'd heard of, or heard in the distance, right out of her reach.
"Well, I was told family is supposed to be where you are safe, and people care about you... right? So if the people who come to you can live there, and care for each other, and protect each other... that's family, right? Your ship is family."
THE SMILE CHANG'E WORE wavered at the mention of love. Terra presented overflowing sweetness and Chang'e could only picture all the ways someone might take advantage of her. Chang'e would rather set the blonde up with Sanji before ever letting that happen. "Your ship is family," she repeated with a slow nod.
"My parents' ship was like that. My dad's first mate was practically my godfather. Everybody else was like my uncle or aunt. I was rich with the love of a family until I wasn't," she recounted.
There was no use getting lost in the past, she determined with a short exhale. "It's like how Luffy calls everybody his nakama. I hope the winds of the sea will carry us closer to our dreams."
he walks over to the rail of the ship silently, leaning his forearms against it right by where vivi has been standing for who knows how long. he doesn't say anything for a while, taking the time to light a cigarette and slowly let out the first cloud of smoke in the silence of the near-dawn light over the ocean.
"vivi dear, did you sleep at all last night?" as far as he knows, she had still been awake when he finally turned off the light in the galley and made his way to the boys' bunks. and now she's up before him, too, something that never happens on this ship. their crewmates love their sleep, and sanji's been used to having these early hours to himself. he's never going to complain about the company, but he can't help worrying about her.
"GOOD MORNING, SANJI," Vivi greets him before his question disarms her. A sleep schedule is such an innocuous thing, but he noticed. The gesture warms her heart all the same. She smiles at the chef to reassure him she's in good spirits and mind. Somehow simple care between friends can be warped into self-censure. She just doesn't want to be a burden to them.
"I'm used to being the first one up. Hard habit to kick," she says then catches the irony in her choice of words in front of Sanji specifically.
"Can I help you in preparing breakfast for everyone or would I just get in your way?"
"Oh right!" The Doctor said as he composed himself and headed back into the console room. There was sounds of rummaging along with an 'ow!' as he hit his head on the bottom of the console. A few moments later, he reappeared with the book in tote.
"Ms. Oswald, your book as requested," He said with a slight bow as he placed it in her hands. A thick, leather bounded book with off-white pages and an embroidered title lied across the spine. "This was given to me as a token of appreciation. It is a first printed edition of a collection of stories. Think of it as the planet's variation of Shakespeare or Poe. I am not sure what the theme of them are but they seem to be a mixture of comedies and tragedies as well as folklore."
THE AIR SHIFTED BACK to light conversation. It was a natural rhythm they knew how to navigate together now. Clara pushed his buttons far less than she used to with the versions she knew. Slipping into old patterns reopened old wounds she would never be prepared for. She had only one remaining heart beat, but something of that nature would break her heart completely.
"My, my, Doctor," she said in a sing-song tone, casting a glance at him. "You sure know how to make a girl's day. Thank you." Her fingers dragged over the textures of the threads and leather. This type of craftsmanship spoke to her as much as the stories within. He remembered.
"It's a bank holiday today. I'd take you around but scanners aren't picking up anomalies—Well, that's not true. They're there but I'm willing to bet UNIT's already on those." She huffed out a breath upward that sent her bangs flying. "Oh no... Seems like we're just going to have to go some place else then..."
A DREAM. . . Chang'e recalled how important the notion of a dream was for Luffy. His tenacity inspired her to envision the finish line of the trajectory of her life. She passed a cup of tea over to Terra as she mentally prepared herself to say the words out loud. "My dream is to be a captain of my own ship. The people who need an escape or safe place to be from the horrors of their partner... their family, I want them to see my jolly roger and know they will be sheltered," she said, releasing a shaky breath. "What about you?"
She took the cup with both hands, listening with great attention. Captain Luffy had put so much emphasis on dreams, that Terra had come to believe them important.
Of course she didn't expect Chang'e to trust her with something too deep, but the beauty of dreams was that there could be as many as one wished. Or so it seemed to her.
But Chang'e's dream was quite special, something Terra had desperately needed her whole life, something that hopefully, some day, would make another lost soul happy.
"I was... I was thinking of trying ice cream, but that doesn't seem..." the appropriate amount of deep now. "There are... so many. So many things I want. The more I see, the more I want."
"My biggest dream is to always be in places like this ship or your future family-ship. To see the world without being forced to hurt anyone or torn apart. Does that one count?" It wasn't exactly an action, but it was still quite the dream to her.
CHANG'E HAD TO SWALLOW her shock. Going by what she heard from the other ship members—finding the All Blue, becoming the greatest swordsman, or being the king of the pirates—she thought she was following in their footsteps correctly. Terra threw her for a loop but it wasn't a bad thing. Chang'e nodded along when quick responses failed to form.
"Those are wonderful dreams. Who said you are limited to just one dream?" She stumbled through that sentence, piecing it together one word at a time. By the time she heard it out loud, she was enamored by the sentiment. "You should get to experience as many things as you want. Life is very rich in things to see," she said.
She drew in a breath to gather the courage to backtrack the conversation back to herself. "Do you really mean that though? My future ship feels like a family to you?"
a light blush dusts her cheeks and she ducks her head to hide the small smile. "flatterer." god she's going to miss this--the quiet moments between the two of them, sitting together beneath her tangerine trees and barely needing to say a word. she loves the boys, but vivi's been something different from the moment she came on board, and it's not just because she's another girl around, no matter how much she jokes about it.
it's just because she's vivi.
she reaches up and grabs a ripe tangerine and a stick, peeling it in the way that still feels so familiar years later, just for something to do with her hands. the comfortable silence continues until she's finished with the pinwheel, and she hands it to vivi with a smile. "for you, princess."
THERE ISN'T A SINGLE MEMBER of the Straw Hats that Vivi hasn't grown extremely fond of. But like a compass north, she finds herself spending her time with Nami every time. Things differed where putting on the persona of Miss Wednesday means being quick was a survival tactic. As Vivi, her reaction staccatos, leaving space to fit in a shy smile and quiet fluster.
She accepts the tangerine with both hands. The fruit is cradled in her hands like something precious because to Vivi, a kindness like this is a treasure. "Who's the flatterer now?" The sweet taste wakes her senses up. Her eyes drift between the tangerine and Nami to avoid lingering on one thing for too long. The repetition links the feeling and sweetness with Nami overall.
"I heard these tangerine trees came from your hometown. Is that right?"
A DREAM. . . Chang'e recalled how important the notion of a dream was for Luffy. His tenacity inspired her to envision the finish line of the trajectory of her life. She passed a cup of tea over to Terra as she mentally prepared herself to say the words out loud. "My dream is to be a captain of my own ship. The people who need an escape or safe place to be from the horrors of their partner... their family, I want them to see my jolly roger and know they will be sheltered," she said, releasing a shaky breath. "What about you?"
The only sign Jason's heard Billy's assurance that he will monitor himself is a slight narrowing of his eyes. Already, Jason's making a note to pay attention. He's screwed up once, not been there when Billy needed him. He'll keep an eye on his friend now, make sure nothing's wrong. That he's really okay, alive and breathing and healthy. It's not just to assuage his own guilt, though that is a factor, but to soothe the fear still thrumming through his veins.
He can't lose Billy. The mere thought of how close he'd come to it - Jason's heart threatens to seize in his chest at even imagining a world where Billy's gone. That's his teammate, his friend - maybe the best friend he has, even if he says he cares for the whole team the same. Jason tucks away the worry for now and focuses on the change of topic Billy steers them towards. "Ernie's little experiments could be worse," he agrees. "Some of 'em are weird as hell though, you gotta say." Jason rocks back on his heels, hands jammed into the back pockets of his pants and he nods in response to Billy's question. "That'd be great, thanks." It'll give him more time to accept the fact that Billy's alive.
AT THE FIRST SIGN of Jason returning to normalcy, Billy's grin grows a little wider. "I would actually veer into pleading the fifth on that. My lips will not speak ill of Ernie but my digestive system will say otherwise," he jokes. Billy has poor constitution as it is without his normal array of supplements and medication. This is nothing but a small blip to overcome now and again. He enjoys the bonding opportunity it allows him to share experiences with his fellow Rangers.
The others have been in his car a fair amount of times by now. They all witness the inevitability of him reaching for the volume knob as soon as the engine turns over. Billy isn't a blaring music type of guy, so he gets flustered over people finding out that he listens to news on AM radio. "I'm thinking of calling a tutoring session. Goldar's last appearance overlapped with Zack and Trini's math midterms. Luckily they got a make up date, but it might be helpful for us to go over the material too. And hopefully, Angel Grove can avoid certain horrors during our exams this week."
It was rare to sense a spiritual presence this far out in the tundras of the northern realm. So few creatures lived out here that it was easy to notice a new power, even as delicate as this one.
Slipping through the air with the grace of his dragon form, he shifted as he landed at the side of the goddess, the temperature plummeting around him instantly before he pulled the cold yin energy back. Keeping it close to the serface just in case so that his features remained that of his true mortal form. White hair drifting in the breeze as frost covered lashes blinked down at her. Head tipping slightly to the side before he knelt down and slowly reached forward.
Fingers carefully lifting the white jade emblem that hung from her waist, turning it over and then stilling to a level as stagnant as the ice around them. The Moon Goddess?
It was well known that she rarely, if ever, left her realm.
Eerily light blue eyes lifted to look over her again, this time searching for any clear signs of injury, before he froze again as his gaze locked with hers.
THE MOON PALACE in its removed isolation was assumed to be cold by most people even the gods until they visit. That had nothing on the Northern realm by comparison. At point of which she collapsed left no imprint in her memory. Her mind was static to match the surrounding perpetual snow fall.
"My... meridian points... Qi is... blocked," she cobbled together the right amount of words to illustrate her circumstance. In her haste, she was too careless. A normal human would have no chance surviving in this mystical tundra. This was a challenge for cultivated gods like her to keep the qi channels open when the arctic breezes constricted them.
"I need... your help." The goddess of the moon palace should have some level of prestige. The fact that she left her realm to ask someone on the fringe of the universe was already shameful enough. But for the sake of her realm's safety, she had to swallow her celestial pride.
the urge to run into the kitchen, despite her insistence still bubbles in him. he doesn't mind strangers, though arguably she isn't one anymore, he has grown good at making conversation. easily flitting about the restaurant, both in the kitchen and on the floor, barking at the other chefs or flattering the customers. but there's a script and a role to follow there that he is still figuring out on the merry. even starting to consider that one might not actually be needed.
"nobody would mind if you didn't," he doesn't make a big show of professing his own enjoyment for her company, it hadn't rolled over her the same way it did with nami. just lets the simple admission that nobody is ready to push her off the ship lie between them.
"I WOULD BE WILLING to bet all my berries that you all say that to everybody you pick up," Chang'e says. Her voice lowered down to a hush so Nami's sensitive financial senses weren't triggered. Her time with the Straw Hats was insignificant but enough for her to pick up something undeniable about them. They were pirates with compassion.
The oxymoron made her lips turn upward at an untimely moment in their conversation. The moon in its crescent phase shone across the sea and its ripples. Its pull brought out strands of silver that sit in contrast to the rest of her hair. "What about you? Can't sleep or making sure I didn't accidentally fall overboard?" She asked with no bite behind her dry humor.
A kiss to the temple during an embrace // for Wednesday
"MOTHER." Wednesday said like it was it's own full sentence. When the embrace didn't stop, she only sighed in return. She patted her mother on the back. Surely, some great tragedy must've befallen recently. If Wednesday played her cards right, her mother would delight her with a retelling.
"This is most unbecoming, but there... There. Tell me what ails you." She tried not to sound too eager about it.