acting tough had never been his strongest forte, opting more
for silence than anything else. maybe that was the only thing
he’d been good at — since everybody knew words never came
easy, ‘nd looking at her, i guess, just made it worse.
she was there, still, barely. he’d cut it close. breath heavy, lungs weak from running and mind swirling with confusion and exasperation and all the things he wanted to say ‘nd needed to say all too lost to find his vocals in understandable speech. All of a sudden his throat felt raw and his stomach twisted uncomfortably, mind doing that stupid thing where it was impossible to even think straight and suddenly and altogether all he could really figure out was her.
god, he loved her. every inch of her; which sounded dumb i guess, but was true. he loved her laugh and her stupid ideas and that ego that always got him in trouble, and he loved her weird orange obsession and her passion and spirit he could never really keep up with. he loved how in love with her he was and how she could make his heart pound so recklessly and feel so vividly that even for a second he could almost believe it was real. she was his comrade, his best friend — double trouble, partners in crime, Kagamine; someone he trusted with everything with but the microwave. he’d follow her anywhere. he’d do anything. she meant everything to him.
god, she meant everything to him.
but for some reason, he couldn’t force the syllables. he had a million and two things to tell her, and he couldn’t word a single one; heart smashing against the inside of his ribcage and palms becoming slick with desperation. he felt sick, skull aching and throat vexing nothingness becausehe couldn’t seem manage something like "i love you",since it felt more like "goodbye"; and then he felt warmth at his palm and realized he’d reached out and found grip around her wrist, using action where words were absent as he pulled her into his chest and held her, tight. close, for a long time. swallowing hard, Len buried his face in her shoulder, arms wrapped about her entire frame with a desperate sorta strength like it hoped, maybe, if he gripped her close enough, she’d stay. his chest hurt. don’t leave.
”…oi.” his voice felt weak, cracking about the edges as a soft smirk played with the ends of his mouth, pressing his forehead to the nape of her neck swearing he’d never forget her since he knew it’d be impossible anyway. swearing he’d never forget the smell of her hair or the feel of her skin, promising he’d never know the curve of a jawline that wasn’t hers as his mouth traced its outline, memorizing each curve and vowing there’d never be lips he’d know better than hers, stomach twisting with raw impulse as caught them against his own and he — - kissed her.
for real, this time — head tipped just a lil’ to the left as he pressed her figure to his own and..kissed her, hard; until he didn’t know how long it’d been or how long he had and until he almost forgot he might never see her again; mouth moving over hers until he was out of breath and until everything but her and him became nonexistent. until his jaw ached and his heartbeat felt steady again. until he almost didn’t have the self restraint to let it go. until she was all that drowned his senses; and he pulled back only just enough to breathe, pressing his forehead against hers and gasping for what little shards of oxygen lingered between her body and his. Rin and Len. left and right. treble and bass. two and two point two. packaged set — that was the deal, yeah? ahhaha;;
“..i’m yours.” mumbled, breathlessly pressed to her skin.
i’ll follow you anywhere, that’s what we agreed, yeah?
even if ‘anywhere’ didn’t necessarily include him. he
gave her his everything, willingly, always. he was
nothing without her. i’m yours.
.. so his mouth tipped a lil’ lopsidedly, ‘nd
he held back a breath of laughter,
offering a soft nuzzle to her nose and
trying not to shake. trying not to act selfish.
trying not to hope he’d never have to let her go.
his chest hurt.
thank you for letting me stay by your side.
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