me, an intellectual: *passing my buddy a slim jim* would you care for this Slender James?
Xuebing Du

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we're not kids anymore.
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@youngandsweetdancingqueen
me, an intellectual: *passing my buddy a slim jim* would you care for this Slender James?
being in your early twenties is like [grocery shopping alone] [having instant noodles for dinner] [remembering random details about that one friend you haven't spoken to in five years] [feeling overwhelming guilt for every purchase that isn't strictly "necessary"] [having midday naps] [finding out through facebook that the girl who was mean to you in high school has a husband and a baby] [falling a little in love with every stranger on public transport] [pretending you're not afraid of being alone] [wondering when you'll feel like a fully realized person] [listening to bands you liked in middle school] [blinking and it's suddenly december] [failing to imagine yourself ten years from now] [feeling like you're running out of time]
obsessed w the way my sister names her spotify playlists
baseball really is the best sport for vampires
Explain
bats
if u think im annoying now wait until i get over my fear of being perceived as annoying
@ the water that drips down my arms when i wash my face and makes a big ass mess: fuckin fight me
reasons I’m still on this hellsite:
1) nowhere else I could find posts this specifically relatable
*gets sad*
me: how can i turn this into a #relatable post and capitalize off of my decreasing self worth?
me 2 the outside world: yeah i don't really care for personality quizzes
me in the corner of my room @ 2am while eating spinach out of a plastic bag: as a chaotic good, sanguine, gemini, enfp who was born in the year of the horse, what should I have for breakfast tomorrow and also who is my soul mate
i arrive at the ball in my finest gown. i descend from the stairs like an angel from heaven and strike a pose
great news you can get all of stacys dad into a gif under 3mb
a good evolution
Memes have become so heavily context-dependent that they briefly spawned a side-phenomenon of corporations mistakenly assuming that the image combinations are simply random, and that “randomness” is what the new generation finds humorous, and then deliberately creating nonsense ads in a desperate attempt to appeal to the youth, which went on for several years before they finally started hiring younger social media managers.
my entire concept of how stocks work is the same thing as the tim & eric skit where they just sold prices
Oh to be a medieval apothecary and have dried herbs in little jars all through my dimly-lit shop