Discoholic 🪩
Today's Document
shark vs the universe
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No title available
Origami Around
will byers stan first human second
Misplaced Lens Cap
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Andulka
Noah Kahan
occasionally subtle
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
KIROKAZE
tumblr dot com
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Janaina Medeiros
Cosimo Galluzzi
Game of Thrones Daily
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
seen from United States
seen from TĂĽrkiye
seen from United States
seen from Israel
seen from Vietnam
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Singapore
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from Canada
seen from France
seen from United States
seen from France
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Singapore
seen from TĂĽrkiye
@youreyesandmybleedingheart
“Deciding how hurt someone is allowed to be with your behaviour towards them is the emotional equivalent of 1. drowning someone and deciding how loud they are allowed to scream 2. setting someone on fire and deciding how much of a mess their ashes are allowed to make 3. stabbing someone and deciding how much they are allowed to bleed. You do not get to destroy someone and decide how ruined they are allowed to feel.”
— Nikita Gill (via untamedunwanted)
“You’re not like the others. I’ve seen a few; I know. When I talk, you look at me. When I said something about the moon, you looked at the moon, last night. The others would never do that. The others would walk off and leave me talking. Or threaten me. No one has time any more for anyone else. You’re one of the few who put up with me.”
— Ray Bradbury (via quotemadness)
When I was younger I remember seeing movies about loving someone without no longer seeing them. I thought to myself that it was rather impossible. How can you love someone without being around them or being able to see the person that they have become?
During my early 20s I also met her. She was the lone star through my rainy night. The blazing sun through my summer. The calming waves on my ocean of thoughts. She was in everything that I found beautiful. Being with her I would have never thought that we will ever have to part ways.
Then there is now. We haven't spoken in years, she's now a stranger to me and I am to her, but I still love her just the same. My heart would break a little everytime I'm reminded of her. It feels like I no longer know myself when I stopped knowing her. Please come back and help me take back the person I used to be.
She, the person behind my most inner thoughts.
The name that I whisper secretly.
Those eyes that I long for.
The smile that I've been craving to see.
She, the person that I miss.
I wonder if meeting the person you have become would still make my heart flutter.
Would you agree if I tell you that the person you are now is different from the person from my memories?
I loved your eyes. I remember writing about it the first time I realized that I love you.
Even though we are no longer talking, I could still remember how they look when you're angry.
I remember how I told you that your eyes holds the galaxy in them. I'm not sure about that now.
But all I know is I would give up all the happiness left in me or the happiness I have yet to feel just to have your eyes look at mine again.
5 years and I'm still writing about it. I guess love does that to people.
You are behind the 'I wish you were here' that I whisper.
The what ifs that I ask myself over and over again.
The should've beens, would've beens, and could've beens.
The love that never goes away. The secret that I share on my pillowcase.
The broken friendship, the forgotten bridge.
Missing you makes me empty. It feels like your memories are taking away all the love and happiness I feel for the people that I have in my life right now. It feels like the void you left me with is like a hole draining all the feelings that I have left. The memories I have with you are haunting me like a ghost, a jealous ghost that is not letting me be happy and just want to keep me all to himself. I felt trapped inside this invisible box that is made out of the times I spent with you and I can't seem to escape. I keep on coming back to you and I'm losing myself, my head is filled with the thoughts of you. I'm heaving through my lungs that is filled with your name. I can't escape you.
Missing you makes me empty. It feels like your memories are taking away all the love and happiness I feel for the people that I have in my life right now. It feels like the void you left me with is like a hole draining all the feelings that I have left. The memories I have with you are haunting me like a ghost, a jealous ghost that is not letting me be happy and just want to keep me all to himself. I felt trapped inside this invisible box that is made out of the times I spent with you and I can't seem to escape. I keep on coming back to you and I'm losing myself, my head is filled with the thoughts of you. I'm heaving through my lungs that is filled with your name. I can't escape you.
Maybe if I dream about you tonight, I'd be less lonely and a little bit happy.
What if you knew that you are the only one who can save me, would you reach out to help me?
What if talking to you again meant filling the void that no one else can fill, would you talk to me?
What if spending time with you will help me bring back all those happiness that I was looking for all these years, would you go out of your way to be there for me?
Or will you stay as the person that I regret losing. The forgotten friendship, the burned bridge. The secret that I whisper, the love that I hid. My biggest what if.
Am I selfish for thinking of killing myself, to leave behind those people who tried to save me? Am I selfish for just trying to be happy?
I remember feeling empty at a very young age. It usually goes away easily. Being young and naive helped, I guess.
Then the numbness started to come back and haunt me frequently during my early 20s. I remember drinking until I passed out just so I could feel something. Being drunk helped, I guess.
Emptiness started to fade. I was happy.
But I guess 'being happy' was not meant for me, 'Empty' suits me better.
I am no longer naive nor happy. I have no energy to even drink to run away from me. I just want to stay in bed and hope that if I stay here long enough I will slowly wither. To slowly fade underneath my sheet just to find the happiness that I can't seem to find in this lifetime.
Do you fee like there is something extremely wrong with you and have no idea how to describe or to express it?
I do.
