Summary: No one told you that your best friend was replaced.
(The reader is gender neutral and is 18+. The ethnicity/race is preferably Black/POC.)
Eating your breakfast, you couldn't believe your eyes as you watched the news; the topic of this morning being an incident that happen at your place of work.
"Late last night, the Vought tower was attacked by an unknown super-abled individual. While there have been no human casualties reported so far, there has been a severe amount of damage."
You sat in quiet disbelief as the camera showed images of the lobby you would soon have to walk through later on. Then it showed outside images of the upper floors where every Vought employee knew that the Seven resided in.
"Shit," you mumbled as the camera zoomed in on the damage. Whoever the Supe was that did this, clearly, they were quite powerful as the large windows of the top floors were blasted through.
"We don't have any leads yet as to what happened or who this person was, but we are all hoping that whoever they were, will quickly be apprehended."
Why didn't he tell me, you thought, placing your breakfast down on the table before reaching into your pocket and grabbing your phone. Checking your notifications, you saw numerous things. Emails about meetings. Promotions for apps and restaurants. Notifications about YouTube and Spotify. Scrolling through them all, you noticed one thing was missing; the one thing you hoped to see. No messages from Earving.
He would tell me if something like this happened, right? You would think so, given your four years of friendship with him, but then again, you and him are technically Vought employees, him being more of a product than anything. If they didn't want anyone knowing about this attack, including employees like you, they would make sure you didn't know anything.
I'll try to find him at the tower, you decided, putting your phone back in your pocket, before picking up the leftovers of your breakfast, and dumping it in the sink, ready to finish getting ready for work.
~
Scanning your employee card, you made sure to look around you, hoping that no one was watching you, before sneaking out of the break room of the crime analytics floor. You hurried to the nearest elevator, hopped in, and pressed the floor for Noir's penthouse. You had gone up to his floor plenty of times to hang out with him, but you did usually send him a warning text before stepping into the elevator. He always sent back a text allowing you to enter, but you had entered unannounced once and found yourself almost having your head chopped off by him by accident. He did everything he could to make up for it, but after that, you made it a mission to always send a warning text to him.
To Noir 🥷⚔️: Hey what happened last night? Did a Supe really do all this? Im on my way 2 ur place
As the elevator got closer to his floor, you silently waited, tapping your foot impatiently, for his usual reply text to come, but was surprised to find nothing had come. What the fuck, you thought. The few times he wasn’t ready for you to come, he would at least send a message, but never has he not replied to you. Earving, what’s going on?
Ding!
Slowly opening, you walked into his penthouse and looked around, looking for anything suspicious. Usually he kept his place extremely neat, almost inhumanly neat, so it was a relief to find the place still the same. His kitchen and living room was clean with the TV turned off, and no furniture was out of place. You ventured to his bathroom and his spare room (a room you’ve slept in a few times when you’ve spent the night with him in the past), but you still didn’t see him anywhere. So where the hell is he?
Creak!
“Earving!”You called his name, letting out a breath.
Immediately you spun around towards his bedroom, and relief filled you at the thought of finally seeing him, but that relief quickly disappeared when instead of the silent superhero ninja-like man that you’ve grown to call your friend, who you saw was a stranger leaving his room. He was around the same height as him, but unlike Noir, he was wearing regular clothes and his face was uncovered. You thought he was handsome, but he was not your friend.
“Oh…um, hey, can you tell me who exactly do I have to go to for-”
“Who are you?” you interrupted him, confused. No way Earving would allow this guy to be in his bedroom. “Why are you in Noir’s place? Where is he?”
“Oh well, I’m the new Noir for the Seven,” he replied with a proud smile that confused and irritated you.
“What do you mean ‘New Noir?’ What happened to Black Noir?” you asked him, your irritation and anger showing in your voice. Did Earving quit and not tell me?
The guy looked puzzled and was quiet for a second, not knowing how to respond to your question, but before you could ask him again, a ding! was heard, and you both turned to see Ashley entering the room with her phone in her hand, and her assistant, Ashley, following closely behind her.
“Ashley, what the fuck? Who is this?” You asked.
Ashely was taken aback by your anger but recovered quickly. “That’s the New Noir. We had to hurry and call him this morning after finding Old Noir’s body and-”
“Body? What do you mean ‘body?’ What happened Ear-” You had to stop yourself, remembering that he didn’t care for others saying his real name, only you. “What happened to Black Noir?”
“He died last night.”
Suddenly you couldn’t breath, and you wished you could no longer hear, but Ashley’s next words were still heard.
“We saw footage of Homelander murdering him.”
You couldn’t hear anymore, you didn’t want to hear anymore, and you rushed past Ashley and her assistant and went to the elevator, stepping inside and pressing the button for the lobby.
As soon as the elevators closed, you pulled your phone out and quickly dialed your boss. You didn’t care that Vought was going through a crisis right now, you didn’t care that people were hurt, you didn’t care about anything. All you wanted was your friend, and he was gone. I can’t be here, you thought, feeling tears welling up in your eyes.
By the time the elevator reached the lobby and opened, you had tears rolling down your cheeks, and as you walked through the lobby, you ignored people looking at you, Earving’s masked face sitting on the forefront of your mind.
~
Sitting up in bed and sniffling, you swiped your finger across your phone screen, looking down at each photo you and him have together. Despite never showing his face, he seemed to love taking pictures with you. Each picture you had with him you were smiling ear to ear with him nearby either looking at the camera, his smile hidden behind his mask, or doing something like doodling in his notepad. Swiping again, you let out a gasp at the picture you forgot you had. It was taken last year on Valentine’s day, and you remember that you weren’t interested in doing anything unlike your coworkers, but Noir didn’t know this. He had showed up holding a bouquet, and took you out for lunch. After lunch, you had someone take a picture of you both with you holding the bouquet, smiling and the supe had his arm wrapped around you. You remember it had been one of the best Valentine’s days you had in a while as you spent the night at his place watching corny romcoms.
I’ll miss you, Earving, you thought, letting another tear fall as you swiped again.
butcher x reader where you’re playing with terror and you say “sit” and you just hear this loud thud from behind you and turn to see butcher on the ground
The first time he does it, he's being a smart ass. You roll your eyes, failing to suppress your grin, telling him he's won.
The next time, is behind very closed doors, and he's way too into it to let it go after that.
It gets to the point where he's so used to that word falling from your lips that when you try and tell Terror to sit when you're around the boys, Butcher doesn't even think twice about the command. Until all eyes are on him.
He tries to brush it off as a joke, but it happens again a few weeks later, and they never let it go.
"Seriously?" Hughie - Hughie of all people - laughs "You follow orders?"
"Listen 'ere y' little-" He stops himself, or more accurately, you glare at him from across the room, holding a very disappointed looking Terror in your arms.
He sighs, takes his hand away from Hughie's throat, and corrects himself.
"When 'ou've got someone like 'em tellin' ya what t' do, y' fuckin' listen"
Hughie's eyes drift over to you, and he sees Butcher's point.
ᯓ★ fluffy, slight gore, sunshine x grumpy trope, reader is gn (but referred to as spiderman)!
Who would've thought that the human embodiment of death was dating the friendly neighbourhood spider-man.
Butcher would never bring you up because part of him wanted to keep you out of his line of work... and the other part of him was embarrassed about it.
About the idea of people knowing you guys were dating.
But when desperate times calls for desperate measures.
They had to call you for a mission.
So imagine the shock on everyone's faces when butcher just casually mentioned the fact he knew you, let alone the fact you guys were dating.
"Wait so you're telling me, this whole time, you were dating the spider-man?" Annie emphasised because she had idolise you as far back as her time training to be part of the seven.
"Wait like like the saves people on a daily basis spider-man?" Hughie joined in, equally as shock as Annie was.
"Yeah yeah, now are we gonna stand 'ere, like a bunch of middle-aged mums chattin' over wine, or are we gonna get 'omelander?" Butcher said, acting all dismissive as though he wasn't trying to hide the fact he was blushing just a bit now.
How you guys dated was pretty much similar to something out of a romance film.
It was right after Butcher had lost Becca.
He was walking down the street, on his way to do his work until a loud crash could be heard from not far. He runs in a hurry to check what it was, people pushing past him while he pushes forward.
Once he makes it past the corner, he looked up to see you using all your webs to hold up a chopper between two buildings. If it hadn't been for you, it could have potentially crushed everyone underneath.
The way you stood on the chopper, saluting at the kids cheering for you before swinging away made you seem... heroic.
He didn't wanna get hopeful. No. Not after everything he learned but shit...
You weren't with Vought and you sure as hell wasn't doing it for the marketing.
Now everytime you get brought up or when he sees you swinging by, he had nothing but admiration for you.
He'll never show it. He'd rather eat shit than admit it to anyone but deep in his chest he was really rooting for you.
Then one day, after an altercation you had with Homelander, as usual, he found you badly wounded on a rooftop. You were breathing fast with your hands gripping your side.
"Come on spider-man, c'mon" You pushed yourself off your ass but the second you extended your hand to swing away. You collapsed completely.
He stood there, hiding behind the ventilation fan as his eyes examined your unconscious body.
Then he took you back to his place.
He laid you on his couch as he treated your wounds. It was bad, burn marks everywhere from the lasers. Parts of your suit ripped or even burnt into your skin from the heat.
As he gentle pressed the cloth against your exposed neck, he'd be lying if he says he wasn't thinking of taking off your mask to see who you were.
The temptation was testing him.
So when he was certain you were out cold, he reaches for the mask, his finger slipping under the fabric and gently tugging it upwards.
The second you felt your mask being pulled over your nose, your spidey senses went off, your eyes jolted open and you quickly weave off of the couch, your hands fast to pull your mask back down.
He stands there, staring at your figure that's now clinging to the far corner of his ceiling.
"Calm down, I ain't gonna hurt ya" He raised his hands, showing he was no threat as you tried to catch your breath.
"Who are you?" You questioned, still on guard.
"'m just a guy. Nothin' compared to ya" He reassured you and it took you a while to get down.
For the night, you'd find yourself seated on the chair while you let him treat you. Then small talk happened and before you realised it, you were now acquaintances.
You'd always swing by and pay him a visit when you can. He hate to admit it but he was falling for your charm. You were like a breath of fresh air compared to the horrid shit he always has to go through.
"So... you wanna kill Homelander? I admire the dedication but you sure you're not gonna get yourself killed?" You asked, rested atop the railing of the balcony.
He scoffs.
"How 'bout you let me 'andle my job spidey" He said, taking a bite of his sandwich while you laugh.
Always so stubborn at every attempt you try to pull him out of this work.
The more you guys spent time together the more you guys grew closer.
Till one day he confessed his love, almost too out of character but you just shut him up by kissing him before he embarrassed himself even more.
All you remembered was how he tried to use the spice girls as a metaphor on your relationship.
When he saw you take off your mask the first time, he shamelessly let out a low "damn..." at the sight. The fact you trusted him this much, sure it meant a lot, but did you have to hide that good looking face away from him this long?
That should be a crime.
Now back to the present, the day you were told to meet up with the boys. You did that superhero landing that had all of them get goosebumps.
Except at Butcher who just snarked at you showing off.
"Mister spider-man. It is such an honour to finally meet you" Frenchie would say, shaking your hand while you chuckled at his gesture.
Is protective of you. Very much so even before he got his freaky powers.
"Love.. don't..." He'd shoot you that look, that pleading look when you were gonna jump back into battle with your injuries.
"Sorry babe, city needs me" You'd kiss him on the cheek then hop off the roof, swinging back to fight the bad guys.
He hates how you're always risking your life for everyone.
Especially with Vought twisting you out to be some terrorist to push a hate campaign against you.
So don't be surprised when he gets into a fist fight with one of your haters on the street.
To which you end up having to stitch him up, lecturing him on your hero morale while he just adores you wholeheartedly.
He enjoys cuddling a lot. He doesn't mind being big spoon but he's a sucker when it comes to being cuddled.
Its not everyday you get babied by spider-man.
Obviously you guys did the spider-man kiss.
He was in the rain, staring at you with that amused glint in his eyes as you hovered upside down in front of him. Your webs being the thing to support your body weight.
"Hey there cupcake" You'd say to which he raises a brow.
"Ain't ya sweet" He'd say before leaning in to kiss you on the lips.
Infinite percent of being your number one fan AND boyfriend.
After you had woken up you were in the bathroom as Hughie showed you how to work it. 'Did you used to bathe back at vought?'
'Once a week... Father would have assistants bathe me,' you mumbled with slight embarrassment.
'Well, I'm happy to say you can bathe yourself here,' Hughie said with a small laugh. You smiled and watched as he turned on the warm water. 'Alright, nice and warm. Use any of the soap and I've put the spare clothes on the counter,' he said before leaving. You giggled and stripped off your clothes before standing under the warm water.
Once you were done you came out in Hughie's clothes and saw Billy on the couch. You ran over to him and he noticed you were finally using two legs and not crawling. You jumped onto the couch and sat beside him. 'Look at that, darlin. You're nice and clean,' he said. You smiled and placed your head against his arm. 'What are you doing, darlin?'
'Affection...' you whispered. He looked at you before he made sure no one was around. He wrapped his arm around you and moved you so you were cuddled into his side. Your tail wagged as he gently ran his hand through your hair.
'Is that better?'
'Yes,' you whispered as you nuzzled into him. He chuckled and enjoyed the feeling of you against him, he liked the fact that you already trusted him.
--
A week later you were doing a lot better and even walked most of the time now. You were sitting with Hughie when your ears perked up and you started to sniff the air. Hughie chuckled and knew exactly who was arriving. Billy entered the base and then Ryan behind him. You smiled brightly and ran towards him before tackling him onto the ground. He laughed and hugged you tightly. 'Hey, sis.'
'Ryan!' you shouted as you practically squeezed him. He smiled and held you a tight as he could.
'I've missed you so much,' he said. After hugging him for a while you brought him to the couch and began telling him everything you had done. Ryan had never felt so relieved now that he knew you were safe and taken care of. You ended up talking yourself into exhaustion and fell asleep next to Ryan. When he noticed he chuckled softly and ran his hand through your hair.
'How has she been?' Ryan asked Billy.
'Good, apart from a bit of expected ptsd.'
'I can imagine... Father treated her so horribly, and before that she was just a lab rat,' Ryan said as he looked down at you.
'I can't imagine treating my own kid like a damn dog. I don't care what bloody mutation she's got, she's a person,' Billy said. He felt his heart warm as he watched Ryan gently comfort you.
'I wish I knew about her earlier, I could've stopped a lot.'
'Don't start blaming yourself for the past, kid. She's safe now, that's what matters,' Billy said. Ryan smiled and looked back at Billy.
'Yeah, you're right.'
--
When you woke up again Ryan was leaving. You whined and wouldn't let go of him. 'I'll be back, okay sis? I'll miss you too,' he said as he hugged you. Billy managed to pry you away and you hugged him instead. He chuckled and wrapped an arm around you.
'Bye, Ryan,' you whispered with tears in your eyes.
'Bye, sis. It won't be long, okay?' he said before he left. You began to cry and buried your face in Billy's shirt. He sighed and wrapped his arms around you.
'It's alright, darlin. He'll be okay,' he said as he gently rubbed your back.
After crying you pulled away and looked at him. 'Billy...?'
'Yeah, darlin?'
'Ryan is my family, he's my brother. What does that make you? Are you family?' you whispered quietly. He smiled and looked down at you. He gently held your face and caressed your cheek.
'Well, darlin. I don't think there's a specific name for it, but you're definitely apart of this weird little family now,' he said. You brightened up and lunged forward to hug him. He chuckled and kissed the top of your head. 'You're gonna be the damn death of me, darlin.'
(Vought has tried to make supe children with Homelander's DNA, the only success is a mutated little girl who has part canine DNA)
Part 2 here
(trigger warning, abusive homelander and just overall creepy homelander)
DISCLAIMER: by continuing you acknowledge the fact that these stories can sometimes be dark and triggering. If you decide to continue you cannot complain if you are triggered. These are fan fictions I do for fun, these are not professionally published books. I don't want critics or feedback, because the works I post here are unedited and something I do for fun and not so it has perfect spelling and punctuation.
All you had known your entire life was a vought lab. Being shoved away like some dirty family secret. Your father visited you sometimes, but it was usually just to check up on progress of your powers. Vought had tried to create many supe children from Homelander's genes, but apart from Ryan you were the only success. The only problem was that you were...deformed. The scientists had studied you from the moment you were born to try and determine why you were born with canine DNA. They still didn't have any answers.
You were in your little cell that had a bed and a toilet in it. You sat on the ground playing with a ball as your tail wagged behind you. You heard a noise and your dog like ears perked up on top of your head. You saw your father entering and your tail wagged even more. He smirked and stepped in front of the glass. 'There's my little mutt,' he said. He enjoyed having someone who was excited to see him, someone who listened to him no matter what. You grabbed your ball in your mouth and sat by the glass as he chuckled.
'Sir, we wished to talk to you about Y/N. We've been seeing good progress in her and we believe with the right teacher she could become more...human,' the scientist said. Homelander's smile faded and he turned to look at the man.
'You think there's something wrong with my little girl?'
'No, sir. It's just if you wanted her to act more human.'
'Well, I don't. She's perfect the way she is. Obedient and mindless, perfect,' he said with a smirk.
'Of course, sir. We'll continue how we've been going,' he said before walking away. Your father opened the cell and stepped inside. You stood up and looked at him excitedly.
'Uh, uh sweetheart. You know I don't like when you stand up. You're a little mutt, you should act like it,' he said. You pouted a little and kneeled back down again. 'Now, isn't that better? You need to listen to that canine part of you, sweetheart.' He reached down and ran his hand over your ears as you twitched a little at the touch. 'Hmm, I wonder how you would go in my penthouse. Would you like that, darling? Want to keep daddy company?' he asked as you tilted your head and looked at him.
Homelander had decided he wanted you around more often. So, he was getting you settled into his penthouse despite the warnings from the scientists. You wandered around the penthouse and sniffed a few things before you climbed up into one of the spare beds. 'No, not on the bed. Come on, hop off. I got you your very own bed,' he said as he gestured for you to follow him. You followed him into his room to see a dog bed at the foot of his bed. 'This way you're nice and close to me,' he said as you sniffed the bed. You jumped up onto his bed as he looked at you in disgust. 'No! I said get down!' he shouted. Your tail went between your legs and you quickly hopped off and went onto the dog bed. 'Good girl. You don't get on the furniture, understood?' he asked. You nodded a little and kept your tail between your legs. 'Good, I'll even get you some good food, hmm? Your own little bowl,' he said as he patted your head.
When Ryan arrived home that day he saw you sitting on the floor just outside the kitchen. He had heard rumours about a hybrid half sister he had, but this wasn't what he expected. You perked up and looked at him and sniffed the air.
'Uh... Father?'
'Ryan! Meet your sister, Y/N. Cute, isn't she?' he said as he threw some food on the floor for you. You ate it off the floor and wagged your tail as Ryan watched with slight disgust. He moved forward and looked down at you.
'Uh, hi...' he said.
'She can't talk, just pat her head.'
Ryan looked back down at you and gently reached down and placed his hand on your head. You smile with your sharp teeth and made Ryan chuckle. He looked at the collar around your neck and frowned. 'What does the collar do?'
'It just keeps her behaving and quiet,' Homelander said as he continued to make dinner for himself.
'It's a shock collar? Isn't that...cruel?'
'She needs to learn one way or another. Let's just hope we don't have to use it,' he said simply as Ryan gently scratched behind your ears. He chuckled when he saw your tail wagging.
'Would they hurt her in the labs?' he asked.
'Sometimes, but she behaves a lot better now,' Homelander said as he dishes up his own dinner and left the kitchen. You whined a little and watched him leave.
'Does she need food?'
'She had some steak before. I'll get dog food tomorrow,' he said. Ryan looked at you sadly. Surely his father wouldn't force you to eat dry dog food. Ryan glanced to make sure his father was gone before he rummaged through he fridge and found some left over pizza. He quickly heated it up before sitting on the floor with you.
'Here, you'll like this a lot better,' he said as you nodded and took a piece. You giggled and your tail wagged as you ate the pizza. Ryan chuckled and ate some with you. 'It's kind of cool to have a sister. I just didn't realise you actually had dogs ears and a tail. Do you know what I'm saying?' he asked. You nodded and smiled with your mouth full. 'But you can't speak?' he asked. You pointed to the collar around your throat and he looked at you in confusion. 'The collar goes off if you speak?' You nodded your head and continued to eat as Ryan looked at you sadly. Ryan glanced around again before he moved over to look at the collar. He found a button that turned off the shock feature. 'There... When it's just us, you can talk, okay?' he said. You looked at him and glanced around nervously.
'Ryan,' you whispered as you pointed at him. He chuckled and nodded.
'That's right, Y/N. Can you say Y/N?' he asked.
'Y/N,' you whispered. He smiled softly and reached up to pat your head again.
'That's right,' he said before he heard Homelander coming back. He quickly turned the collar back on. He came back out and smiled.
'Look at you two getting along. Don't let her up on the furniture, alright?'
'Why not?' Ryan asked in confusion.
'She's a mutt, mutt’s don’t belong on furniture,’ he said in a harsh tone.
‘She’s part human and your daughter. She should be treated as such,’ Ryan said as he stood up.
‘If you have a problem with how I handle her, you’re more than welcome to leave, son.’ Homelander stepped closer and you tucked your tail between your legs. You slowly crawled forward and sit in front of Ryan with your ears pinned back in submission. ‘What the hell are you doing? Are you protecting him?’ His voice was still harsh as you looked at him in fear. ‘Move, mutt,’ he growled as he glared at you. You whined in fear and moved back a little. Ryan kneeled down and placed his hand on your shoulder.
‘It’s okay, I’ll be alright,’ he said. He offered you a soft smile and you crawled backwards to sit behind Ryan.
‘Oh, now you’re scared of your father?’ Homelander said. You looked at him with an uncertain look in your eyes.
‘Father, she hasn’t done anything wrong. She’s just confused,’ Ryan said. Homelander sighed and rubbed his head.
‘Fine. Get in your bed, mutt,’ he growled. You whimpered and quickly rushed off to the bedroom where your bed was. You curled up in the bed and looked up on the bed to see a warm blanket. You thought for a second and sneakily grabbed the blanket and curled up into it.
A few minutes later Ryan walked in to see you curled up in the blanket. He smiled and laid down on the floor beside you. ‘Hey, father has gone for a meeting. You wanna come out with me? I can turn the collar off,’ he said. You smiled and your tail started to wag again as he reached up and turned the collar off. You smiled and suddenly leapt up and ran out of the room. Ryan chuckled and chased after you as you sniffed around the house. ‘Easy girl! Don’t break anything.’ He watched as you jumped up onto the couch and began sniffing over it. ‘I guess you haven’t been out of the lab much. I have an idea, but you have to promise to behave,’ he said. You sat up straight and looked happy as your tail wagged. ‘Come on. Just stick close to me.’
Ryan took you up to the roof and you stared in awe up at the bright sky above you. Ryan smiled and saw tears in your eyes. ‘Wait… Have you never seen the sky?’
‘On…tv,’ you said as he looked at you sadly.
‘They really never let you out, huh?’ He asked. You shook your head before you went to the edge and glanced down at the city.
‘Very high,’ you whispered. Ryan smiled softly and stood beside you.
‘Yeah, the city can looked pretty scary from here. It’s not so bad though,’ he said. You looked at him and he noticed your tail wagging again. 'What's on your mind?'
'You're...family?' you asked.
'Yeah, I'm your brother. Pretty cool, huh?' he said. You smiled and lunged forward to hug him. He chuckled and gently hugged you back. You nuzzled into him and he gently patted your ears.
'Family,' you whispered. Ryan suddenly felt even more protective over you, he hated the idea of you being treated like a dog.
'We better get back before father gets home.'
--
When Homelander returned he found you curled up in your bed with a blanket. He rolled his eyes and woke you up. You yawned and looked up at him as your tail began to wag. 'Who's blanket is that, hmm?' he asked. You went to speak but quickly stopped yourself. You pouted and took the blanket off and handed it to him. 'If I didn't give you it, you don't it. Do you understand that?' he said sternly. You nodded and kept your head down as he scolded you. You glanced up at him with your ears pinned back.
'Father...' you whispered before the shock collar gave you a nasty shock. You whimpered and backed away from him.
'We established that you don't speak, sweetheart.' He stepped closer as you whimpered and feared up a little. You kept down low and tried to seem as submissive as possible towards him. 'If you keep this up I'll muzzle you as well, darling.'
--
It had been abour two years since you'd started living with your father. Whenever he wasn't around Ryan was teaching you how to talk better and after two years you'd gotten pretty good. He had even taught you how to walk properly. You were home alone and asleep on the couch when the door opened. You quickly hopped off the couch and sat in your bed when you saw it was your father. You smiled and your tail began to wag but it changed quickly when you saw him glare at you and slam the door shut. You looked at him in fear. 'A little birdie told me Ryan has been teaching you to speak and even how to walk. Little mutts like you aren't meant to speak, are they?' he said as he stepped forward. You went to run but he leapt forward and grabbed you by your hair. You yelped loudly and the collar shocked you. 'You're having time out. You want to take it for granted? Huh? I'll show you what life without me is like,' he growled as he grabbed a few things and dragged you into the elevator. You struggled against him and whimpered quietly but he kept a tight grip on you. The elevator opened at the roof and your father dragged you around the corner and pulled out some rope. He began tying you to a pole as you cried softly. 'Stay! I'm getting something better to keep you here.'
He returned a few minutes later with a chain and a muzzle. You looked at him in fear and whimpered softly. 'Those puppy eyes won't work on me, sweetheart.' He attached the chain to your collar before locking the muzzle around your mouth. You whined and pulled at the chain as you tried to get closer to him. 'If you're lucky I'll come give you food.'
You whined as loud as you could before you were shocked again. You sobbed in pain as you watched him leave you alone.
The next morning you woke up and shivered from the cold rain that had fell overnight. You whimpered softly, you were so hungry and cold. You heard a noise and tried to move against the chains. A figure moved around the corner and looked at you in shock. 'Bloody hell... What the hell are you?' the man said. You cowered in fear and pulled against thr chain. 'Oi! Calm down, you're gonna bloody choke yourself,' he said as he knelt down and looked at you. You stopped pulling against the chains and stared at him with wide eyes that were filled with tears. 'Never seen anything like you, darling...'
You heard a noise and looked up to see Ryan, he looked at the man in shock. 'Billy? What the hell are you doing here?'
'Came to get some bloody information and found this little thing up here,' he said. Ryan looked at you in shock and rushed forward.
'Y/N, oh my god. I was looking for you, oh god you're freezing,' he said as he ripped his jacket off and put it around you. You whined softly and moved closer to Ryan.
'You know her?' Billy asked.
'She's my sister...'
'She's your fuckin what?' Billy asked in shock. Ryan tried to take off the muzzle but realised it was locked with a key.
'She's my half sister. They used Homelander's dna to try and make more supes. She was the only success but her dna mutated into...this,' Ryan explained as he tried his best to warm you up. 'Father treats her like a dog... She sleeps on a dog bed, she eats dog food, drinks from a dog bowl and isn't even allowed to walk,' Ryan said with a sad look. Billy looked at you and could see how terrified you were.
'Fucking hell... I didn't think that bastard could get any sicker.'
'You have to take her back with you. Please, Billy. If she stays here I don't know what father will do,' Ryan begged. Billy groaned and rubbed his face before he stood up.
'Kid, I can't take her on.'
'You have to, please. She's been treated terribly, with you she can actually learn to be a person. She's a supe, she could help you,' Ryan said. Billy looked at you again and hated that he felt bad for you.
'Fuckin hell, fine. I'm only doing this for you, kid.'
'Thank you, Billy,' he said. He looked back at you and smiled. 'Billy is going to protect you. With him you'll be able to speak and even walk, okay? Like I taught you.'
Billy watched with a fondness in his eyes as Ryan spoke to you. He managed to get the chain off the collar and helped you stand up. 'Will you be able to get the muzzle and collar off?' Ryan asked.
'Yeah, I'm sure Frenchie will work it out,' Billy said as you held tightly onto Ryan's arm. 'It's alright, sweetheart. I ain't gonna hurt you, I'll take you somewhere safe, okay?'
--
With a lot of crying and whining you were finally back at the boys base. Billy entered first and was thankful the base was empty for now. He led you insicr and sat you down before he grabbed some tools. 'Alright, darling. Let's get those damn things off you,' he said. You stared in fear and tried to back away but he gently held onto you. 'Shh, it's alright. I'm just taking the muzzle and collar off, okay?' he said. You looked at him with caution in your eyes and sat completely frozen while he began to pry open the lock of the muzzle. He managed to get it off and then began to work on the collar. He made sure to turn it off first before starting to pry at it. He managed to damage the lock and busted it open to see permanent scars from it on your neck. 'Bloody hell, luv... How long have you had this damn thing on?'
'For always,' you whispered. Billy looked at you sadly and could see just how broken you were.
'Well, no more, alright? You ain't gotta wear it here and you're allowed to speak whenever you damn well please,' he said. You looked at him nervously and glanced around.
'Food?' you asked timidly. He chuckled and stood up.
'Bet you're starving, darling. I'll get the boys to pick something up on their way home. In the mean time I've got some chips, nothing fancy,' he said as he tossed you a bag of salted chips. You looked at it in confusion and started to chew on the side of the foil. 'Bloody hell. Luv, the food is inside it,' he said as he opened the bag for you. You sniffed the bag a little before you began eating the chips inside like a wild animal. Billy chuckled and ruffled your hair while you ate.
When the boys returned they carried in about six boxes of pizza and all froze in shock when they saw you on the couch next to Billy.
'Ah, Mon Ami. Are you aware you have a furry beside you?' Frenchie said as you looked up and your tail started to wag.
'This is Y/N. Homelander's deformed kid,' Billy said casually. You jumped down from the couch and crawled towards the team as they stared at you. You sat in front of Marvin and tilted your head. 'Give her some pizza,' Billy said.
'Uh, okay,' Marvin muttered. He placed a box on the ground and opened it for you. You glanced back at Billy for permission.
'Go on, luv. All yours,' he said. You smiled and quickly tore into the pizza while your tail wagged faster.
'She's Homelander's Daughter? How?' Hughie asked as he watched you eat.
'Apparently they tried to make a bunch of supe kids with his genes. She was the only success, but the dna mutated into that,' Billy said as the team nodded. You practically devoured the pizza before running back to Billy and getting on the couch again. He chuckled and ruffled your hair. 'Alright, you're very cute, luv. Starting tomorrow I'm teaching you to be more human,' he said as you looked at him.
'Ryan... Taught me to speak...and walk,' you said. Billy smiled fondly at the thought of Ryan teaching you things behind his father's back. 'That's why I was on the roof...father found out.'
'Well, you're father is a right bastard, darling. You're a person, you're gonna start acting like one,' he said. You smiled with your sharp teeth and Butcher chuckled softly. 'Cute, ain't she?'
'Does she...bite?' Hughie asked.
'She hasn't tried to. Don't go treating her like a dog, treat her like a person. Got it?' he said sternly as the team nodded and went their seperate ways. Hughie cautiously stepped closer and looked at you. He noticed the scars on your neck.
'Did she have a collar on?'
'Yep, and a muzzle. Her own father put her in them,' he grumbled. Hughie looked at you and smiled.
'Hey, you want to look through some of my clothes? Might be better then those wet ones you're in,' he asked. Your ears perked up and you nodded. Hughie reached a hand out and helped you stand up. You were a little wobbly on your feet, but you managed to walk beside him. He guided you into his room and you began to sniff everything. Billy followed you both to keep an eye on you and watched you while Hughie found some spare clothes. You cautiously moved towards the bed and sat on it as you glanced at Billy to see if he’d react.
‘It’s alright, darlin. You’re allowed on the bloody bed. What, your daddy not let you up on the furniture?’ He asked. You shook your head and Billy felt even worse about your situation. ‘So, where did you sleep, luv?’
‘Dog bed in father’s room,’ you said. Hughie turned around and looked at you sadly.
‘Your father forced you to sleep on a dog bed? Did he give you…dog food too?’ Hughie asked.
‘Yes,’ you whispered. He offered you a sad smile.
‘Well, you get real food here and a bed. I’ll happily take the couch and you can have my bed,’ Hughie said as you smiled and your tail wagged.
‘It’s alright, Hughie. I’ll be able to find a spare mattress today somewhere in storage,’ Billy said. You began to mess up Hughie’s bed and sniff around as they chuckled. ‘Or she’ll claim your bed, mate.’
You plopped down onto the bed and curled up under the sheets. ‘I don’t mind, especially when she’s so cute.’
Billy chuckled and looked at you all cosy. ‘Alright, get some rest, but after that you’re getting a bath and new clothes, darlin.’
⋆｡𖦹°‧★ Somewhere along Butcher's campaign against the Supes, you and Hughie fell in love. Being discreet has been a battle, but since you're the only two people who still look sick when someone gets hurt, you have the perfect cover story. As far as Butcher's concerned, you're both liabilities. So, when you and Hughie openly sit out on the fire escape late at night, the team simply assumes you're trauma-bonding over the body count.
⋆｡𖦹°‧★ The best moments are when you and Hughie have the hideout to yourselves. You listen to music, laugh, and hold each other. You're able to sit on his lap and run your hands through his hair without worrying about the latest bloodshed or the inner conflict tearing your team apart. Still, the psychological pressure of keeping the relationship a secret is especially hard on Hughie, given his tendency to internalize stress. He constantly looks like he's on the verge of a panic attack, which ironically keeps the team from seeing the real reason he's terrified. They simply assume he's nervous about the latest ploy.
⋆｡𖦹°‧★ The omission becomes particularly unbearable whenever Butcher is near, but Hughie still keeps his hand flat against your thigh under the table. Since he can't meet your eyes directly without cracking a smile, he watches your reflection in the dark glass of his laptop screen while Butcher talks strategy. You both might think you're being slick, but Butcher has already noticed you wearing Hughie's shirts.
⋆｡𖦹°‧★ Your stolen moments together aren’t always lighthearted. You find each other after the bloodbaths too, desperate for one another's touch where stale blood hangs heavy on the walls. Hughie pulls you against him, burying his face in the crook of your neck. Blood squelches between you when his arms lock around your waist. "Just hold on a second," he breathes, his chest heaving against yours. You share a fragile intimacy born from the constant threat of dying at any given moment. "We're fine," he whispers into your skin. "It'll all be fine." It's a needed reassurance for you both.
⋆｡𖦹°‧★ The volatility of your secrecy blew up one evening in a motel bathroom. The claustrophobia of your latest mission had driven you both over the edge, and a lovers' quarrel quickly became an intimate rendezvous. Hughie let you pin him against the wall, his hands tangling in your hair as his mouth crashed against yours. "Yeah," he mumbled against your lips, his hands shaking as they slid down your back. "That's great. You're great. Yeah, right... right there. Awesome."
⋆｡𖦹°‧★ You could feel him smiling against your lips, breaking through the tension. Feeling playful, you unbuckled his leather belt and dropped to your knees, dragging his jeans down to his ankles and leaving him exposed and heavily aroused in his boxers. Hughie let out a sharp gasp, letting his head fall back against the tile wall.
⋆｡𖦹°‧★ Just as you began reaching for his waistband, the door handle rattled and swung wide open. Soldier Boy stepped into the doorway, surveying the spectacle with a short tilt of his chin. He grinned, mildly amused as his eyes drifted down to the ridge stretching the front of Hughie’s boxers. "Shit, kid. Get a load of that bandstand," he whistled. Then, he turned on his heel to walk back into the hall. "Time to haul ass. Clock's ticking, and blowjobs sure as hell aren't on tonight's itinerary," he called over his shoulder.
⋆｡𖦹°‧★ Hughie quickly snatched his jeans up and took your forearm to help you to your feet. You expected to see panic reflected in his eyes but an excited flush colored his cheeks instead. "Cat's out of the bag, I guess," he said pressing a quick kiss to your forehead. "I suck with secrets anyway. The stress of keeping one? Terrible for the metabolism. Can we, uh... do you think we can take a raincheck on this?" He pointed in the general direction of his groin with a nervous laugh. "Because that'd be super."
Nina's Remarks : Thought about this the night before the S5 premiere. [4.4k]
tw : pregnancy, allusions to sex, birth, language, slight ooc, homelander is ben and reader's son
Homelander had been doomed from his childhood. The sterile environment doctors and nurses provided him growing up shaped him into the person he was today. Even he, in his deranged state, knew it was no place for a kid to be. He never stood a chance, who could blame him for how he turned out ?
But now, in front of him, laid the answer to all his questions, his father. Soldier Boy. Or Benjamin Hargrove, as he'd come to learn. His mind still had yet to fully comprehend that Soldier Boy was indeed his dad. His whole life he had idolized the man, and when he finally met him, his dreams were brutally crushed.
Soldier Boy suddenly began to stir before opening his eyes for the first time in years. His vision was blurred for a few seconds as he tried looking around to assess where he was. He used his hands to stand himself up, part of his body still feeling too numb to move.
He caught his breath as if he'd been running a marathon. He was on edge, unaware of where he was and what had happened since the last time he was conscious. His gaze finally met the only other person in the room, Homelander. "You, what the fuck ?" He said, his voice coarse from the lack of use of his vocal cords over his time asleep.
He tried getting up, ready to fight if needed, but his legs could not keep him standing. "You were on ice for two years at a CIA black site, but you're safe here. We found you this morning during a raid."
Ben was about to make a crude joke, but decided to hold his tongue for once. He looked at the man walking towards him. He noticed his son's nose, it reminded him of someone. Someone he hadn't seen in a very long time.
As Homelander explained to Ben his plan to catch William Butcher, Soldier Boy couldn't help but be unfocused. Everything reminded him of her. Even Homelander's mannerisms seemed to be inherited from a woman he'd never met.
He was cut from his thoughts by Homelander. "Hey, are you even listening ?"
"You're so much like her." Soldier Boy simply mumbled, having no interest in their previous conversation. A small smile appeared on his face, it shocked Homelander, he'd never seen his father express any emotion other than frustration towards him. Ben saw the confusion on his son's face. "Your mother." He said, his usual annoyed tone coming right back.
Homelander's face dropped, his serious demeanour disappeared and his voice was no longer sure of itself. "My mother ? How could you have known her ? She was a random runaway Vought found."
Soldier Boy huffed. "Is that what they told you ?" He said, as though it was the worst thing Vought had ever done. "Your mother was Starspangle."
Homelander knew who she was. She'd been a member of Payback and Soldier Boy's recent wife at the time of his disappearance. Why had he never thought of this ?
"But her name was Y/N. She hated that bullshit alias Vought stuck on her." Homelander sat down next to his father, as he took in the news. He remembered seeing her in films and books, how blind he had been. "I still remember the day she told me about you. She was terrified, but not because of what would happen to her. She was afraid of what would await you."
You bit your lip as you tried to hold back your tears. Positive. Fucking positive.
You didn't know whether to be thrilled or scared. A supe baby ? Vought was a morally corrupt company and unfortunately, they quite literally owned your body. What would they do if they got their hands on a naturally born super-abled child ?
You threw the test away and quickly wiped your eyes, hoping your cries weren't visible. You stormed out of the washroom, fearful for what was about to come for you and your baby.
As you walked through Vought Tower, you kept your head down. The last thing you needed now was to be seen in this state. And obviously today you were out of luck, as when you turned into the next hallway, you ran into someone's chest.
You felt a pair of hands grab your shoulders to stabilize you. "You alright, sweetheart ?" Soldier Boy. Ben. Your husband.
Your relationship had an uncommon start. Vought brought you in to strengthen Ben's appearance as America's golden son. You met in late 1970s, and back then nothing was more patriotic than being a married man with three kids. Luckily for you, as your partnership went on, this fake relationship you'd put up for the public, slowly became real.
Ben before and after you, were like to separate entities, at least to you. Before he officially met you, he had the reputation for being quite the womanizer, or in other words, a man whore.
But once Vought made him sign papers stipulating that he could not be seen in public with any other women, he calmed down a little. He had no plans to stay loyal at first, after all what was the use of it to him ? He was famous, might as well use his influence to get some action.
But after spending so much time with you, he made a realization. He didn't need a hundred women, not when he had one who not only satisfied all his needs, but he felt good being around. You weren't there for his money or his fame, you had your own, and you certainly weren't there to brag about sleeping with him, you had no need for that.
He looked down at you with real concern in his eyes, you knew you wouldn't be able to hide this from him. You pulled him into the nearest empty room. You looked around to make sure there were no cameras, and confessed your truth.
"I'm pregnant." You simply stated.
Ben's eyes went wide, almost with a sense of relief. "I was startin' to think I was shooting blanks, especially considering we're at it like rabbits." He joked, unsurprisingly, as he wrapped his arms around your frame and brought you close to him. "This is great news baby."
As much as you truly wanted with all your heart to share his excitement, you were unable to. Tears began dripping from your eyes and he pulled you away to look at your face. "What's wrong ?"
"I'm scared."
"There's nothin' to be scared about, you're not the first dame in history to push out a baby."
You gave him a slight chuckle before sharing your concerns. "I'm scared for the child. I don't want Vought involved in their life the way they are in mine. But at the same time, I'm greedy. I want this baby so badly, but I couldn't bear giving them my life. I don't want to give Vought another lab rat."
Ben knew you were right. Vought had never showed mercy to anyone, not even children, so why should yours be an exception ?
Homelander huffed. "She knew."
Ben wondered why he kept on talking, or why he was even talking in the first place. Homelander was the strangest person he'd ever met, and he had never felt the need to have a real conversation with his son. But in that moment, for reasons beyond him, he wanted to speak.
Maybe it was because his brain was still half-frozen, or maybe he just missed you and this was the closest he could get to you. Homelander was technically what was left of you available to him.
"She always knew." Soldier Boy said. "We planned to keep you a secret and run away. Back then, goin' off the grid wasn't too difficult. We were gonna raise you on a farm in Montana." Ben almost laughed at the thought, maybe then he could've raised his son to be a real man. "But that fucker Mindstorm and Countess ratted us out to Vought. And they were so damn happy."
You were sitting at your designated chair in the Payback conference room, reading over some files from Vought's latest report. As you turned a page, something was thrown in front of you. The test you'd taken earlier.
Your eyes went wide. You slid the test on the ground as quickly as possible to make sure no one else had seen it. You looked up to see who had tossed it your way. Crimson Countess.
She stood tall in front of you with her arms crossed, that spiteful expression on her face she only ever reserved for you. "You little whore. Not even a year married and you get yourself knocked up."
"What the fuck are you talking about ?" You said, on edge.
"Don't even bother playing dumb, that act may work on everyone else, but not on me. Mindstorm looked into your filthy mind and confirmed it all."
You knew she resented you. When she and Ben had broken up, for some reason you weren't aware of, Vought wasted no time trying to clean up their moneymaker's image. You were the perfect accessory, the girl America wanted.
You were younger, more willing to comply and exactly what Ben's public image needed. To say the concept of a friendship between you and Countess would've been difficult was an understatement.
"Countess-"
"Aren't you lucky ? Pumped full with his kid, isn't that the wet dream of every woman in this damn country ?"
Countess' relationship with her ex was an odd one. Although it was obvious to anyone with a working pair of eyes that she held a great deal of animosity towards the man, she still couldn't let him go. Not even after he'd moved on himself.
You tried to stay calm as you begged her not expose your secret. "Listen, please don't tell anyone about this."
"Why ? Are you afraid Vought's gonna have you kill the parasite or keep it ?" She chuckled.
The moment the words left her mouth, you were getting ready to jump up and attack her, but before you could, someone burst through the door. "Let me go !" It was Mindstorm, battered and bruised, his hands tied behind his back and a rag placed onto his eyes, being lifted off the ground by Ben.
"Ain't it weird that Vought employees are congratulatin' me when I walk by ?" Ben said as he threw his teammate at Countess' feet. "You bitter old cunt. Can't you get it through your thick skull that you're no longer hot shit at Vought ?"
Countess rolled her eyes, masking the way his insults did in fact hurt her. She paused, thinking about what to say next. "You're the last person on Earth who should be a father. We all know it."
Ben was not one to be affected by the way people insulted him, or at least not publicly, but you saw the shock that covered his face for a millisecond when Countess spoke.
You knew Ben had some unresolved problems regarding his father, and he had yet to tell you much about it, but it seemed Countess knew this was something to bring up in order to catch him off guard.
Suddenly Countess turned back towards you. "And you, how stupid do you have to be to let this happen. All your beauty and all your youth, down the drain for a man almost three times your age !"
Before Ben could interfere, you confronted your teammate yourself. "Sounds to me you're just frustrated because fifty years from now no one will remember your name."
"Like you're any different ? 'America's sweetheart' ? Your brand is built on your looks and your age, once that's gone they'll find you a replacement."
"Like they did you ? Jealousy is a disease Crimson." You said, specifically using the nickname you knew she hated the most.
You were surprised she didn't clap back, she simply walked away. She gave you a look as she slammed the door behind her, thinking to herself 'I hope that pest rips you apart'.
"What a bitch." Ben simply said.
You hummed in agreement as you joined him in the middle of the conference room. Too tired to speak, you placed your arms around his neck. He instinctively put his hands on your hips and tilted his head to make sure he was properly looking at you.
You brought his face closer to yours and softly placed your lips on his. His right hand moved from your hip to the small of your back, pulling you towards himself.
The advance slowly became more and more intense. Ben lifted you up and sat you down on the table, placing himself between your thighs.
The sound of your lips was interrupted by a shout and the door opening at the same time. Ben stopped his advances, but stayed where he was. He looked at Mindstorm then the Vought employee who had just walked in. "Everyone here is such a cockblock !" He said, genuinely annoyed.
The employee looked at the floor out of embarrassment as he spoke. "Starspangle is demanded in Mr Edgar's office."
"Noted." You said as he quickly ran out of the room.
"These fucking people..." Ben grumbled as he detached himself from you. "You better get to Edgar's before he sends more of his lackeys."
"Do you think it's about..." Ben simply nodded to confirm your fears.
You got off the desk and took a deep breath in to calm your nerves. Before you left, Ben grabbed your upper arm and gave you a look, silently saying 'stay strong'.
As he watched you go, he knew you would be alright. You were a strong woman, if you weren't you never would've made it in this world, supes were ruthless.
He looked back at Mindstorm, his hands on his hips. "Now what the hell am I gonna do with you, rat ?"
You walked into the offices of the newly appointed Vought CEO, Stan Edgar. The room was cold and devoid of any warmth. He got up from his chair and walked over to you to shake your hand before inviting you to sit down.
"I believe congratulations are in order." He said with a smile, but you could tell that he wasn't happy for you, he was happy for his company.
"Thank you." You said keeping up your act, too afraid to do anything other than to comply.
"Although, I do wish you would've informed me or one of my subordinates first."
You stopped yourself from scoffing. "I'm sorry, Mr Edgar. I was just so shocked by the news. This was truly something unexpected."
"This child will do great things for yours and Soldier Boy's rating. The public loves a perfect family." As you'd suspected, the only thing that truly mattered to Vought was money. Maybe for a slight second, you'd thought otherwise, but it was truly a foolish idea. "We will do a lot of publicity to make sure everyone in the country is aware of the good news."
You took a deep breath before asking the question that was burning your mind. "What will happen after the birth ?"
"Oh, well I don't have a definitive answer for you now, but I would venture to guess we'll give you and Soldier Boy that classic American family storyline. And once the child is of age, maybe they will take the mantle and lead Vought's next generation of heroes. Who knows ?"
You mentally sighed in relief. It could've been worse.
Oh boy, how things couldn't have gone more wrong.
Once you started to show, Vought shipped you and Ben to the top of their priorities list. Interviews, photoshoots, documentaries, the whole package. You were certain even people on the other end of the world who'd never heard your name knew you were expecting. Your face was on packaging for pre-natal vitamins and pregnancy tests, what a nightmare.
After a long day of keeping a perfect smile constantly on your face, you were exhausted. By the time you'd made it back to your appartement, you fell back on your bed. Ben was already there, lying to your left.
You slowly turned your head to the side to look at him. His hand reached towards your shoulder to grab the strap of your babydoll nightgown. He rolled the fabric between his fingers, teasing whether or not he would move it away.
He gave you those eyes you knew oh so well. You chuckled. "Not today. I've got no energy left."
He stood himself up using his elbows, and looked down at you. He sighed with a smirk. "Whoever said pregnant women were hornier is full of shit. I feel like I won't be gettin' lucky these next few months."
You huffed. "Well, this is the result of your actions, mister." You said, holding onto your stomach. "You put yourself in this position."
"Pretty sure if anyone was puttin' anyone in positions, it was me puttin' you places, darlin', and you enjoyed it." You gave a sarcastic laugh.
You suddenly felt something move in your abdomen. The baby, it was kicking. You lifted up the skirt of your dress and looked down. There it was, your skin moving up and down on its own, proof of the life in you.
You looked at Ben who seemed almost mesmerized by what he was seeing. He sighed and his demeanour slowly shifted as he softly placed a hand on your belly. "Kid ain't even here yet and I would burn the world down for him. Give him the life I didn't get."
"Him ?"
He looked back at you. "Trust me, I know."
"Well, I think he's lucky to have you."
After all these years of partying, Ben was ready to leave that life behind and focus on the present, on who really needed him. That little boy needed someone to take care of him, and Ben felt it was his responsibility to give him what he never got.
"After I woke up, the first time, I did my research. I wanted to know what had happened to her since I left for Operation Charly. She had to stay back 'cause she was 'bout nine months then. She didn't want me to leave that day, I shouldn't've."
Soldier Boy looked at Homelander, he had his face nestled between his hands and his eyes were fixed on the floor. He might've looked distracted, but in reality he had never been more focused in his life.
"Maybe if I didn't, you wouldn't have been... such a fuck up."
Maybe I could've loved you, he wanted to add. But he knew Homelander was erratic, and in his weakened state, he was in no mood to start a fight.
The morning after Ben left for Nicaragua, you started your day as normal. You ate, brushed your teeth, changed into your redesigned costume and made your way to the conference room of Vought Tower. But on your way there, you felt something slowly trickle down your leg.
"Fuck !" You yelled. What were the chances your water would break the moment your husband left the country ? You stayed calm despite your frustration and managed to make it to the infirmary.
You were accompanied by a team of almost twenty doctors for six hours, but the only person you needed there was nowhere to be found. You could see the almost fearful looks on their faces. What could they expect from this child ? This was a first.
During the last stretch, you were phasing in and out of consciousness, but you distinctively remember a member of Vought personnel, coming into the room to whisper something into the ear of the lead doctor.
Not long after that, you were injected with more sedatives. "He's been neutralized, let's move to plan B."
You could barely form a thought about what you were hearing. What was happening around you ?
Your confusion was broken by the sound of a baby's cries. Your heart stopped. "It's a boy." Said one of the nurses. Ben's bet had been right.
You tried to look at your son, but he was hidden by the people holding him. The only thing confirming his presence to you, was the noises he was making.
"Please, let me see him." You said, your voice slurred. Your pleas went ignored. You became more and more erratic, why couldn't you see him ? You tried catching your breath, but it felt like your lungs were blocked. "Please." Water began forming at your eyes.
The baby's cries became stronger and suddenly a burst of red light emitted from where he was. The nurse almost dropped him from shock. He'd burned a hole in the ceiling. He was super-abled.
When your mind came to that realization, you couldn't help but cry. What would they do to your boy ? What would they do to your innocent boy ?
You'd hoped he would have been born normal, so you could've run away. Raise him somewhere far from all this, in a normal house, without any powers or responsibilities. But from the moment your son was born, he was nothing but cattle to the world.
For a slight second, you thought about Ben. Where was he now ? Had someone told him the news that he was a father ? How had he reacted ? Was he disappointed he missed it ?
Through all your begging, the nurses and doctors seemed to refuse to let you see him. So you tried to get up, disregarding the pain your body was in. Out of all the combat you had been involved in, nothing compared to this.
You soon noticed that your wrists and ankles had sneakily been attached to the hospital bed. You tried to shake out of them using your strength, but you were too exhausted. All you could do was cry, as your screaming fell upon deaf ears.
You felt the bed you were on being rolled into the hallway. You were surrounded by personnel on all sides, making them the only thing you could see.
You felt something sting your lower arm, you didn't need to look to know they were injecting you with something they weren't supposed to. It burned your veins, worse than anything they'd ever given you before. You felt your heartbeat slowdown, your eyelids becoming heavy and your vision going black.
Homelander exhaled, flabbergasted by this new revelation. Everything was a lie. He could've lived the life he so badly wanted, but Vought ruined it for him. He was so shocked by everything he'd been told, his mind went blank. For that moment, he forgot all about Butcher or his plans to conquer the world. All that mattered now was the life he was robbed of for money.
"Now, whatever the fuck you've got planned, that's the last thing your mother would want you to do."
"How could you leave ?" Homelander asked as he got up, completely ignoring his father's previous advice. Soldier Boy scoffed. "Why would you fucking leave so close to her due date ? Surely you knew how close it was."
"I didn't have a fucking choice. A mission is a mission. And Soldier Boy was needed there. I didn't know I was gonna be sold out to the reds."
Homelander clenched his fists, his mind confused by everything, but he was unable to put his thoughts into words. He looked at his father one last time and stormed out.
He quickly made his way to the elevator, ignoring every person who passed by him. They were insignificant compared to what he was searching for.
"Homelander, I was thinking-" He heard The Deep say, but he just walked past him, as if no one had addressed him. He could hear his subordinate call for him, but his voice became more and more distant as he reached the elevator. He got in and was surrounded by Vought employees and low-level supes.
"Out." He simply said, and they did as he commanded out of fear. As the door closed in front of him, he clicked on the elevator's last button, designating the lowest floor of the Vought building, the archives.
When he walked out, he was surrounded by miles of shelves holding hundreds of boxes, each holding thousands of documents and Vought artifacts. He calmly walked towards the 'S' section of the floor. His eyes analyzed each label until he reached for the one he needed, 'Starspangle - Classified'.
He grabbed the box and immediately began reading through all the paperwork. It started with the beginning of your career, explaining where you came from, your family lineage, the first designs for your costume and branding. Then came your introduction to Payback and Soldier Boy, later on the plans for the two of you to have a relationship to calm his image.
Then Homelander stumbled on the files confirming everything. In summer 1980, you had gotten pregnant, without the intervention or approval of Vought. The company took the opportunity and ran with it, making the whole ordeal a publicity stunt. In spring of 1981, the same day Soldier Boy disappeared, you gave birth to a super-abled baby boy dubbed 'John'.
Homelander was shaking, from anger or sadness, he didn't know, but he kept reading. The document ends stating that you were neutralized that same day. The rest of the files in the box explain the conspiracy coverup to create a Mandela effect surrounding the fact that you were ever pregnant and announcing your death alongside Soldier Boy's.
The papers fell from Homelander's hands. He began losing his balance as he felt the room spinning around him. He held onto one of the shelves for support, but he still managed to slightly fall backwards. He bumped into what he thought was a wall, but he heard the sound of fabric falling behind him.
When he turned around, he discovered a human-sized capsule. The pod's glass was cloudy due to the ice that had accumulated on it. Homelander was suspicious, but he felt the need to know what was in there. He took off his glove and wiped his hand on the cold surface, revealing what was hidden underneath. What he saw made him fall to his knees.
Here you were, asleep, in the flesh. The closest you'd ever been to your son since the moment he was born, and you weren't even aware. This whole time, the person he longed for the most, had been an elevator ride away, and he never knew.
Your skin was pale due to the amount of time you'd spent in the cold, but your chest was rising and falling, confirming that you were indeed, alive and breathing. He thought you were dead, they all did.
But after all, why would Vought kill the asset that gave them the first naturally born supe ? You were the prize cattle.
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warnings: crazy daddy issues, soldier boy, cuss words
It was the gift of a nightmare she could not sleep long enough to have that living through one was filling in for. After the awkward interaction with Soldier Boy the previous night she had accommodated herself in the adjacent motel room. However the sleep was short lived as the banging on her door early in the morning came with an unavoidable invitation.
Hughie was left with Soldier Boy for obvious reasons and she had to attend yet another road trip with Butcher. Perhaps their first if she were to forget the trip from her first house to her boarding school where he’d dropped her off and never picked her up from. Not going there. She thought to herself as the endless road stretched on, “How long is this going to take?”
“Why? ‘er majesty’s feelin’ car sick?” Butcher scoffed as if she did not get her impatience from him.
“First you wanted me to fend for myself against Homelander now you need me to accompany you for an errand?” She complained, her elbow resting against the closed passenger side window.
“I don’t be needing you for anything luv, you just won’t be doing so well to be left with that old nutter.” Butcher explained, there was nothing fatherly or even humane about his relationship with his daughter. He was never going to be that person. That’s what he told himself at the irkness he felt watching her move away from Soldier Boy the other night. It was clearly not the odd ill-feeling of seeing his daughter with someone so deplorable. The possibility of something arising between her and Soldier Boy sat with him like spikes.
“Why? What did I do?” Oblivious to where his conclusion came from she questioned, “I kept him in one piece?”
“Sure did” he snickered, as if Soldier Boy needed somebody to help keep him in one piece. It wasn’t about that but he won’t admit to his parental side interfering. He never could because he could never recognise the father within himself. “Well, there we are!” He said pulling up to an seemingly abandoned gas station. Like everything else it seemed to be in the middle of nowhere. Glancing at the time once he got out of the car and almost like clockwork, another car was pulling up. He saw her bracing herself as if for impact with her body language, “s’fine.”
Getting out of the car at the same time as him she leant against the door, waiting the intention of yet another long trip to be revealed. “Uncle M?!” Her eyes lit up as if in an instant when she saw who was getting out of the other car, he could barely close the door behind him before she rushed to the man, jumping at him.
“Oh get in here!” He reciprocated her hug, almost lifting her off her feet. It seemed like time was withering off them, Bucther may not have been the best father but his picker for people was so strong that he had MM, on a legal document she didn’t yet know about MM was her ‘godfather’. The first time she had ever met ‘uncle M’ was during butcher’s initial supe hunting squad days. Kidnapped off her grandfather’s suburb during her spring break to get the squad to back off, it was MM who rescued her even by disadvantaging their own mission because Butcher wouldn’t budge. It was that day and today, ever since MM had been present in her life. Referred to her as his “oldest”.
Graduation, school plays, grandfather’s funeral, MM was there. There weren’t a lot of milestones in her life growing up in a boarding school, raised by her grandfather from Christmas break to spring break. But however many could be there, MM was present. Going out of his way for attendance in her life often highlighted just how easy it would have been for butcher to do the same. Only he didn’t. With time she let go off the notion that her father was not present because her auntie and uncle were always cheering louder over his absence.
“God Monique’s going to kill me” MM said pulling away to get a good look at her, it had been a while since he had last seen her and he had not known he would be meeting her again anytime soon.
As glad as she was to see him again, her heart sank at the realisation that he was back in this buisness. “So you’re…back in all this?” She had to confirm almost hoping he was not back to the vengeance life and was running one favour for Butcher.
MM did not know how to answer that without disappointing her. “Your hair’s gotten so unruly.” He commented to shift away from the question, ruffling the top of her head.
Letting out a slow chuckle she internalised the answer he did not gave her but was received. So he was dragged back into this mess. “Proper little reunion. Ain’t that just beautiful?” Butcher asked as he walked away from the car and toward them, “brought a tear to me eye” he scoffed, “jolly good if we could get back on track though”
“You didn’t tell me this was your guest for Judy?” MM said shaking his head, to think he would be used to unpredictability from butcher by now.
“What’d she say then?” Bucther disregarded MM being offended he had not laid out his plan on him entirely, it was rather simple. Drop her off where he’d dropped terror off, at his aunt’s place.
“Vieille dame did not take to us kindly.” Frenchie spoke, he assumed this would be a short interaction before getting her for Butcher and the rest were not on the best of terms for now. “And she sent him back” he spoke releasing terror from his grasp.
“Oh bollocks” Butcher sighed in agitation watching Terror free from Frenchie and rush towards, her.
“Are you kidding me?!” With a gasp she lowered herself instantly holding the pup in her arms, Terror jumped and licked her enthusiastically. “No way-“ she muttered as she kissed her baby all over. Butcher stood to the side, deadpanning for he knew what was coming. “You piece of shit you told me he died!”
“Got you to stop phoning didn’t I?” It was an unnecessary trail from her to him every now and then whenever she would call asking for updates on the mutt.
She couldn’t bother to even look at him, so overcome with hugging her life long pet who she had to mourn for, thinking he’d died. MM witnessed that interaction, phased he would lie about her childhood pet dying. “That is way too low, even for you.” He commented but Butcher just rolled his eyes at the melodrama.
“Off you go then, mustn’t keep Judy waiting for breakfast.” Butcher motioned, he’d asked MM and Frenchie to clear the premise for his aunt Judith where he kept terror was seemingly the safest off radar house he could place her in. “Finally get ‘er wish, that old bag” when butcher lost his first wife to childbirth, it was beyond difficult for him to raise the baby. Always a mess, with the wailing baby, cleaning and feeding along with his grief. As poorly as he made work do, he raised the infant.
Kept her alive up until she was five, not the best textbook father surely. It was odd, looking at her face and realising just how much she had lost due to her birth but he used to refrain from admitting out loud or even to himself. Not celebrating her birthdays for the grief was too fresh, even after five years. Her grandfather when, came to know upon this notion intervened. For that was no way to raise a child, it was a fight and something his daughter surely had no knowledge of. But she could only remember growing up with grandpa, to butcher the man never even saw him a proper fit to marry his daughter let alone raise his granddaughter. An alcoholic battling with depression, a legal battle would’ve ended his chances to even see her. Eventually as she grew older the best and safest gift to her was his distance.
Judy, back then was offended that Billy never let her raise the child. Would get her wish now nonetheless. “She said no. And wants nothing to do with you.” MM briefed Butcher.
“That can’t be” he tilted his head, somewhat taken aback because his plan was firm to send her away.
“Can’t blame her” Frenchie chimed in and earned an unwarranted glare from Butcher. “Also won’t take Terror back, ever. Her words not mine.”
“Why didn’t you tell us the guest was her?” MM questioned crossing his arms.
“As if you’d let me ship ‘er off without poking your nose in.” Butcher scoffed, he’d have dropped everything to collect her let alone send her away.
“Why is she even here? With you, of all people?” MM asked again, unaware she was hunted by Homelander.
“Homelander knows.” She answered for Butcher and watched the light in his eyes shift.
MM let out a deep breath, he had a lot to say to butcher about dragging not only the people he loved into his darkness but also the people butcher himself was supposed to love. “And your idea was to send her off to some old aunt in the suburbs?”
“He wouldn’t be sniffing ‘round there” butcher said, to him it was as safe as the next place otherwise he wouldn’t have left terror there in the first place.
“You’re so full of shit.” MM scoffed shaking his head at the ridiculousness of it, “She’s coming with us.”
“No chance mate.” Butcher said, he knew it wasn’t safe with himself but it surely was less safer than MM over at the base where he was no longer allowed for the new grudge they held about him.
“I’m not asking.” MM emphasised.
“You think you and your lot of powerless Kimiko, drugged up Frenchie and little miss sparkles will hold against Homelander?” For it was sure that Homelander would find her at the heart of the city with this lot, first place he’d look. “Get back in the car” Butcher told her, she did not move.
“Anyone who has cared about her all her life knows you are the last person to trust to keep her safe.” MM saw no point in holding back, he knew that it was a purposefully the nastiest thing to be said to Butcher.
Butcher did not let it show on his face, like everything else but it was evident to look through in his eyes, his jaw clenched and a still body language as if he was so moved he’d forgot to breathe. It was no use reasoning with MM he figured, “you go with him, the blonde cunt’s gunna find you a’long with ‘im and the rest who can’t do fuck all to save you or themselves.”
“Don’t listen to him.” MM was beyond reasoning with the logic.
“There will be bloodshed and it will be on yer hands.” Butcher pointed at her, talking over MM because he too was stubborn to get his way.
“I am sorry…” she looked at MM, the last thing she wanted for herself was go back with Butcher even when she had another option with uncle M. But she could not take him up on the offer at the cost of putting him in danger.
“You know damn well he is just trying to get to your head.” MM countered, butcher was going even lower tapping at her worst fears for she was raised with this sense of ‘blood on her hands’ attitude because of what happened with her mother.
“Homelander will not hesitate.” She told MM, “I don’t want to go with him but I have no other choice. I will not risk your life.”
“It’s fixed then.” Butcher clasped his hand together, in a sort of show’s-over way. “Get in the bloody car.”
“I’ll see you soon alright?” Hugging her uncle M real tight she closed her eyes behind his shoulders.
MM pierced daggers into Butcher’s conscience as he look over at him behind her shoulders, patting her back, “you take care of yourself alright?” He placed his phone in her hands. “It’ll take just one call.”
She nodded, clutching the phone tight, god knows she’ll need it. With a snap of fingers for Terror to come follow, they parted their ways again. In the car ride back to the motel she had nothing to say to him. Letting herself sit with the silence of the cruelty he held for her as second nature. He too had nothing to justify for himself and simply didn’t want to.
—
“No no no, Terror drop it. Drop it.” She directed at the bulldog trying to make a mess of the food scraps scattered within takeout boxes Soldier boy had lying around.
“Ah shit” Ben spoke when he came upon the sight.
“Terror. Enough. Drop it!” At that the bulldog let go off the takeout wrapper and rushed to her, she grabbed him up on her arms, sat on the desk table leaning against the chair whilst Butcher and Hughie were across the room with some maps scattered out. They deemed Soldier Boy too technologically dumb to help with input of their search yet he insisted they do it where he can keep an eye on them.
“What the fuck kinda name’s ‘terror’?” Soldier Boy scoffed with his hands on his hips looking at the little shit revel in her kisses.
She paused, trying to think of exactly why her childhood pet had the name terror. Come to think of it she could not recall the exact reason, “probably because of a cartoon or something..”
“No” Bucther spoke, looking up from the maps, “It was the only name he responded to when we got ‘im.”
“We always called him Terror, that was his name.” She tried to correct him, as if she were to forget how long her childhood pet had that name.
“Not at first” Butcher shrugged, “it was going to be something dumb perhaps but then he only responded to Terror when I called you ‘lil terror.’ ‘cause you were one.”
“What?” Her brows came about together knitted, confused.
“It was always ‘go to sleep li’l terror’ getting you to eat ‘one last bite li’l terror’ you were an exceptionally pain in the arse toddler ‘cause you would never sleep on time, you were picky with the crushed bullshit. And every time I would have to talk to you over your wailing calling you li’l terror, that bugger would light up—so the name came from that.” He would have never in a million years would’ve believed that he would be looking back at his unlived life, reminiscing it back at her. There was a faint glint in his eyes just talking about those moments.
The moments she did not even know were there because for as far as her memory stretched there was no memory of him being a father to her in a way that mattered. “Oh..alright” at a loss of words she simply held to Terror closer.
Soldier Boy’s harsh low snicker brought her out of her stance, “and since when do men put babies to sleep and feed them?”
She closed her eyes in disappointment knowing this would not unfold something nice with him. “The ones with motherless children do.” Butcher snapped, surely a nerve was hit.
“I’ll call bullshit when I see it.” Soldier Boy huffed, doubling down.
“Why? ‘cause I stayed for me lil nipper?” The last person who Butcher would let look down upon on his parental skills was Ben.
“You stayed?” She scoffed, did he really think that not abandoning her since age zero counted as staying.
“Guys I think we need to—“ Hughie tried to intervene because he did not want the previous day repeated.
“You left me at grandpa’s, the only man who can ever claim he raised me and when I started to settle in well enough you dropped me off at boarding school.” She reminded him what it was like to be at the receiving end of his gracious presence.
“You think the fucker was sound in the head enough to let him raise you?” Butcher scoffed, from her mother, his first wife he’d known enough that the retired colonel ‘grandpa’ was not the best influence to have around. It’s not what she would have wanted and Billy himself was not equipped enough against his father in law to raise her himself.
“You took me away from him. Left me at the boarding school and you never visited once-“ she was interrupted almost quickly, he matched her volume too.
“That’s what he’s told you!” He pointed at her, Billy was already the worst man in the old man’s eyes when he married her daughter he simply became the devil when he fathered his grand daughter “he always saw me as devil-sent for marrying his daughter and an awful father with you but the cunt never saw YOU as someone who took away his precious daughter to come into this world. You took her away from him.” Butcher knew it was out of line and just as purposely done. “You took her away from me.” He added in a lower, quiet tone what carried a lot of weight.
By then silent tears were already streaming down her face. She was still holding Terror and the irony was that she had spent all the years the bulldog had on him in a life unlearning her hatred for taking, her own mother, his wife away from him. And yet she could not escape it, “Homelander let me go because he wanted you to watch when he kills me.” Through her tears she let out a humourless laugh “isn’t it ridiculous that he thinks he can kill something in me which you already haven’t?” Standing up to leave she stood in his way, “I hope you die and I get to watch.” It was the worst thing she could think of and she said it only to realise her entire existence was so fickle in his life it would make no difference just like her living or dying wouldn’t, just like it never did. Rushing out for her exit, she left to her room through the connected door slamming it shut.
Butcher stood in a tense contemplation of her outburst, he wanted to not let it show on his face but when he couldn’t prevent it he simply left the room himself. Rushing out with Hughie nagging back at him, following him outside.
Ben stood there in the aftermath of something his comment had started. It made no difference to him how strangers raised strangers. He had been out too long to grow a softer heart to situations like these however her face, instantly bloodshot eyes and a quivering lip trying the absolute hardest to talk through a meltdown. Her face. He could not seem to get it out of his head, all over the damn dog!
He sat his drink down decided to take matters into his own hands after all, he couldn’t shake away the feeling of being partly responsible. With a small stride to the door which connected to her room he turned the knob to open it but it was locked from the other side. “Open the door, sweetheart” his voice came out, not soft yet not a bark either. Just characteristically loud. He tried shaking the knob when there was no response from her, “It’s me! Come on open up.” He banged upon the door yet again. “If you don’t open up in five seconds I’m breaking it in.” He called out only to gain no response. Not even a shuffle of movement. With no other option he pressed his shoulder against the door and with one shove the whole thing came apart, he didn’t even apply too much of force to begin with.
“Cheap fucking thing.” He scoffed setting the door aside which came apart with one push, as he moved further into the room. Finding her curled up on the twin sized bed with the dog whimpering with a sad traditional dog look on its face at the edge of her bed. “You seriously can’t be crying over this?”
“Fuck off” she said without looking up from where her head was buried amongst her pillow, hiding her face and the tears he knew were there.
“I couldn’t even if I tried, the door’s broken.” He pointed out and snickered hoping she would find it funny. “Alright” he put his hands on his hips staring at her unwaveringly miserable. So much so that she won’t even look at him. Not that there was anything between them which would warranty that occurring, but still. He made a short pace back to his room and letting her to think he left her alone.
Only to come back with a glass, he nudged her shoulder with the glass, “Ain’t no better way to drown in your misery.” He offered her the drink, he made himself. Which was a lot for him in the first place even if she would not realise that.
Clearly she did not. Taking the glass from his hands, when he finally got to see her tear streaked face right before his eyes followed the glass that she threw across the room thrashing. “Okay that was the cheap stuff anyways but I’m trying here!” He huffed, at his wit’s end with her.
“Get out of my room!” She yelled at him, sitting up on the bed. This was the last moment she needed someone’s interference with.
“You can yell louder than that, from your diaphragm come on!” He talked back at a composed volume, yet not taking her seriously.
“I don’t want your shoulder to cry on and I don’t want your advice.” She tried to reason with him only to realise she would be the butt of that joke.
“Okay” he shrugged and when he moved it made the impression he might be leaving, instead he sat on her bed, next to her but still with some space between them.
“For god’s sake!” Whining in frustration she fell back on her bed, hiding her face in the pillow again. Hoping the blindness it provided form the world would take her in all the same.
“I know I’m the last bastard you wanna keep on doing this song and dance with. But you’re unlucky enough to keep ending up with me in tears and I wasn’t raised to be a pussy who can ignore a crying woman.” He spoke, hoping he had taken the glass she threw across the room for himself to get through this interaction easy. “Look your father’s an asshole. I’m sure you know this yourself, you crying tears in here all over your pretty face is not going to change any of what’s happened.” Only as the words came out of his mouth he realised just how bad he was at this whole thing.
She didn’t even make an attempt to move, With a sharp intake of breath he continued, “I was raised in a boarding school. We have that in common…” he trailed off hoping she would at least look at him now that he was being open about his own tapestry of life but when she didn’t he was almost glad because he wouldn’t want her to see his phased face as he recollects his lesser memories, “grew up in a wealthy South Philly mansion with twice of everything a boy would need. The boarding school was filled with other rich kids too stupid to know what to do with their money. Yet most of them would have their parents pick them up during spring breaks and a day out on birthdays—even the poor ones. A different chauffeur always picked me up and I would lie my father was in the car just not getting out because it’s too cold…as we got older the other kids saw through it. Who wouldn’t? I was young but I realised pretty quick that the money will never make up for a lot of things. It never did” he exhaled, the memories crossing his mind like a bad fever dream. That life was so farther away from him. “And neither will time…” he told her. For if she did not realise, even with time apart there was no redeeming what had already happened between Butcher and her, her childhood. Same way the money wired to his account for his father’s absence always bought another round for his pals but never pushed away the heavy lack.
Finally, as though his story had got to her or that she only wanted to see his face to test his genuineness about it. She turned around sitting up. Seemed like the later fell through given she didn’t kick him off her bed, a single tear making its way down her face and she wiped it quickly looking up at the ceiling, heavy moments spent in an anticipating silence. “I feel like a fake.” She let out, looking away from him. “I have had to raise myself to never need or want anything from him ever again…and when he told me all those things just now I felt like I was seven years old again right after he told me I took my mother to come into this world and that’s why all the other kids gets a birthday and I don’t, so what truly have I done with myself all this time-my entire life; if his words can still have the same effect on me?”
He blinked. Out of surprise that she considered that to be fake, it was ridiculously funny but he kept the laugh to himself. “You feel like a fake for that?” He had to confirm given how crazy it sounded to him, “these things take their sweet fucking time to be out of your system doll, it’s like the coke you get from a local park dealer—“ before he could go on his colourful choice of words made her let out a suppressed giggle which made his heart flutter. But he kept the notion to himself, as if the smirk making its way to his lips involuntarily wasn’t a sign enough “there’s that lovely sound.” He didn’t realise he was thinking out loud but didn’t mind it.
It got her to wipe her tears without more streaming down her face, at least for now anyways. “I don’t know what to say Soldier Boy you are-“
He interrupted her, “Ben.” He had a name. He had a name he wanted her to say as if the only one she knew. As if he only had it if she said it. “It’s Ben.” He had been Soldier Boy to so many awful set of people for so long.
“Ben” she repeated as if testing it out, shifting in her place on the bed, the distance between them measurable but not so far that he couldn’t dive into the colour of her eyes. Which was mainly because of how he sat, wide legged leaning against one thigh which was closer to her, regardless she straightened a bit. “You are the last person I would expected to give me a pep talk.”
“And when you’re crying the first thing I want to do is make you stop so I can kiss the daylights out of you.” Once again the filter connection of his thought process and his tongue favoured no filtering which made him say it out loud. Not that he was one of those coy boys who thought a million times before saying their piece to a pretty woman. That’s the thing about a pretty woman she can disarm you to say anything without thinking and if you’re thinking too hard you’re probably a homo because nonchalance is a weaker man’s weapon. That was Soldier Boy’s thinking. Ben was saying the words.
“Oh…” she was dumbfounded clearly because he sounded so truthful about it. As much as she wanted it this was the last thing she could afford. “What-? Oh-“
“God look at your face” he laughed, in her face, “I’m not going to kiss you right now. I got plenty of time to find a moment where I have to race you to it.”
“What? To kiss you?” His overconfidence in his charm had her back to her usual self and she didn’t even realise just how quick the shift happened.
“Uh huh” he had a smug expression on her face, “the day’s just around the corner sweetheart.”
“Okay.” She hated that she could not avoid smiling against his blatant flirting, “Just because I let you come here doesn’t mean you get to say anything that comes to your mind.”
“Haven’t heard that one in a while.” He scoffed shaking his head, at the obvious double meaning of her ‘letting him come here’.
“Get out!” Suppressing a chuckle she hit him with the pillow behind her back.
Followed with a deep chuckle of himself he finally got up. “Saved some fries from the last one if you want it.” He told her walking backwards to his ‘connecting’ room.
“Coming in a bit” she said letting out a huff at the normalcy of moments.
“—Coming huh?”
—
Let me know what you think of this PLS PLSSS!!! Also discuss with me about the boys finale im losing my mind and I don’t want to text my ex (the only person who watches the boys) about it KIDDING I’d never text that loser (sAvE mE)
The bed creaks under the weight of your body currently riding Hughie’s, your movements furious and fast as you bounce up and down onto his cock, creaming it all the way down to the base. A creamy ring circles around his length, a telltale of the multiple orgasms you had been giving yourself, working your pussy on his shaft while all Hughie can do is whine under you.
His hands are gripping the fat of your thighs, sometimes travelling to the plump of your ass and spreading your cheeks apart to drive his cock deeper inside your pussy; only when you let him thrust up, ending his suffering as he begs for more. “Fuck—Please, God, I—” You almost feel bad for the poor guy; his face red and sweating as your ride him. Your hands grip onto the headboard, making it slam against the wall. You could care about the noise, about the fact that everyone knew what you were doing.
Your ass dropping down onto Hughie’s thighs creates loud skin-slapping noises echoing into the room, mixing with both your whines and moans, curses and praising. “You feel so good, fuck, please.” Those, obviously, come from Hughie’s mouth.
His fingers tightened their grip onto your ass, slamming you back down onto his fat cock as you bounced onto him. Your puffy folds clenched around his shaft, as if to try and milk him dry. Sticky noises and squelching were created by your very wet pussy, juices smearing around your pussy and to your inner-thighs.
One of your hands moved to Hughie’s mouth to cover it, your words jumbled as you tried to speak up. “Shut up—You… You want Butcher to come see what’s happening here?” Your eyebrows furrowed in pleasure, the bulbous tip of his cock rubbing against your velvety walls, stretching them until his shaft was all the way buried inside your pussy. You gasped as Hughie shook his head, his own eyebrows furrowing and you took your hand away. “No, fuck… I don’t! Unless you want to?” He asked, his expression suddenly serious like he was thinking about it.
You groaned at him, sitting onto his cock and letting the bulbous tip kiss at your cervix gently; his girth stretching the gummy walls of your pussy. Juices leaked from your sloppy hole, coating his balls that were sticking to your ass. You clenched your walls and he gasped, head hitting the headboard. “Are you seriously asking me that? God, Hughie. Fuck, no, I don’t.” You replied, looking down at him as he lifted his eyes up to you.
He didn’t have time to speak another word as you started to grind onto him, rubbing your soaked pussy down against his bush; sensitive clit scratched by his pubic hair. You rolled your hips slowly, gasping at the feeling of his shaft inside your clenched pussy—the way his member filled you up, how his pre-cum mixed with your juices, how his mushroom head kissed your velvety walls.
“Yeah, just… like that, please. You feel so good, baby.” Hughie whined, licking his lips like he was trying to keep the focus on you.
His hands travelled from your ass to your waist, fingers gently caressing at the skin of your body; all the imperfections, all the perfections, everything. The tip of his digits sneaked to your breasts until he groped both into his palms. He squeezed your tits, rolled his thumbs against your nipples to stimulate them until they perked up. “They are so pretty. You are so pretty, you know that, right?” He looked up at you all while squeezing your breasts in his palms, pinching your buds in between his digits, tugging on them as you gasped.
You rolled your hips with a faster pace then, nodding at the man under you. “You tell me all the time, so yeah, I might have gathered that.” You joked, sighing at the sensation of his hands playing with your tits. Hughie chuckled, licking his lips before pushing himself up just to take one of your nipples in his mouth. You gasped, arched your back and leaned toward him with a stronger grip onto the headboard.
He started to suck on your bud and only then, you bounced back onto his cock. Loud squelching noises echoed from your soaked pussy as you went up and down on him, more juices leaking from your hole with creamy white coating his length. The bed creaked once more until the weight of your actions.
The headboard slapped against the wall, making thud noises back to back. Hughie moaned around your tit, his tongue pushing onto your perked up bud, his saliva smearing around and dripping to your skin.
Your skin was sweaty from the previous orgasms you had, your muscles burning from so much effort as you kept riding your boyfriend. One of your hands slipped from the headboard just to finish in Hughie’s curls, tugging on them. He whined, his teeth grazing your skin before he pulled away, your nipple leaving his mouth in a loud wet pop noise. Both his hands went to your ass, speaking your asscheeks to bury his cock deeper when his hips thrusted up inside you.
Your juices leaked, making a mess down his length and to his balls; wet skin slapping noises echoed loudly in the room; your sloppy pussy lowering itself down his shaft like butter. “God, god! Yeah, that’s it, you’re doing so well!” He cried out, his head hitting the headboard once again as you kept bouncing up and down on him. A warmth coursed through your body at his praise, your pussy clenching around his cock to milk him dry; his balls slapping against your ass.
One of his hands moved between your legs just for his thumb to play with your slick clit; rubbing it in circles, hard and fast before soft and slow.
Your thighs shook around his hips, it became harder and harder to keep the pace with all the pleasure you felt. “You want to come? Come on my cock again, please?” Hughie groaned, and your pussy clenched before a loud moan escaped you; your orgasm strong and violent. You cried out his name, your upper body folding itself against his chest.
Your velvety walls immediately squeezed his cock and Hughie gasped, thumb still rubbing your clit but his second hand helped your hips move up and down his cock still. “Hughie, fuck!” You groaned and he thrusted up to help you, his cock rubbing inside your pussy which overstimulated you. “Fuck, I know—I’m close… Just a bit more.” He said, the tip of his bulbous head hitting the g-spot at the entrance of your pussy.
You gasped, tears forming at the corner of your eyes with the overstimulation and how good you felt at that moment. Hughie’s hips thrusted up, his cock burying itself inside you as your lips parted wide to gasp, drool at the corner of your mouth. Your boyfriend thrusted once, twice and thrice before burying himself all the way inside you finally, his cock throbbing inside your warm cavern.
His hot, creamy white load filled you up to the brink, some of it leaking from your sloppy hole just to drip to his base and down to his balls. His cock twitched inside you, and your pussy pulsated in reply. “God, that was… insane.” You heard Hughie say, his arms wrapping around your sweaty back to keep you on his chest.
You were both breathing loudly, minds fuzzy and thoughts in shambles for a second.
“Mhmh, yeah, fucking insane.” You replied softly, feeling his semen slowly dripping out of you in globs, making a mess of his balls and onto the bedsheets. There was a silence in the room for a second—only broken by the loud breathing and little whines before Hughie spoke again.
“Were you serious about Butcher watching us? I mean, is that something you’d want? Just—If that’s what you want…”
You rolled your eyes, looking up at his face. “Feels like that’s something you’d be into, weirdo.”
Every time your thoughts started to form, they spiraled— fast, sharp, and unforgiving— straight into you are not in your world anymore and you gave yourself Superman powers like an absolute idiot.
So, you didn’t think. You just breathed, slow and steady, like that might somehow anchor you in place.
“This is fine,” you said out loud, because apparently saying it made it more believable. “People wake up in alternate realities all the time. Totally normal. Happens every—“
Your reflection moved.
You froze mid-sentence, your body going rigid as your eyes slowly drifted toward the wardrobe mirror across the room. There you were— standing exactly where you should be with that ‘deer-in-headlights’ look— but something about it felt… off.
“… that’s not right…”
You took a cautious step closer, as if the mirror might betray you if you moved too quickly.
It didn’t, just like the floor didn’t crack when you moved. Still, better safe than sorry.
The mirror just stood there, reflecting you back with quiet, unwavering honesty.
Except… it wasn’t quite you.
You were taller. Not dramatically so, but enough that it threw everything off. Your eye level sat higher than it should be, your proportions just slightly stretched in a way that made you feel like you’d been shifted half an inch out of alignment.
Your shoulders were broader, too. Your posture naturally straighter, like your body had decided slouching was no longer something it tolerated.
Which was something you dreaded if you were to pull off the whole ‘Clark Kent’ persona thing—
You looked stronger.
Not bulky, or exaggerated— just built.
Like every part of you had been refined into something sturdier, something denser. Something that could take a hit and keep standing.
For the second time in an only a few minutes, your stomach dropped straight out of your ass.
“Oh my god, I got buff.”
Your hands came up immediately, patting at your arms, your sides, your waist, like you were checking to make sure everything was still attached properly.
Spoiler alert: you were not pulled apart and put back together again like some sort of Frankenstein experiment. Your nose shape was still the same, your lips still had the same pull as before, shit— even your hip dips remained!
Still, it was unnerving to see all these familiar features on an unfamiliar body.
Everything felt solid (R.I.P to the soft pudge on your stomach, you will be missed). Real. Warm beneath your touch.
“…Okay,” you said faintly, trying to keep your voice steady. “Okay, that’s— fine. That’s fine, I can work with this. I can—“
Something brushed against your brow.
You stilled.
And finally, your gaze rested on the one small thing that really drove the ‘oh-my-god-I’m-fucking-Superman’ idea home.
A single curl of hair, resting perfectly, deliberately, across your forehead.
You stared at it.
You pushed it back. It fell forward again.
You blinked, then pushed it back again, harder this time. It bounced right back into place like it had something to prove.
“No,” you said firmly, like this was the one thing you could not stand with. “Absolutely not. I refuse. I reject this. I did not sign up for branding.”
The curl, evidently, disagreed.
It stayed exactly where it was, like it paid rent.
After a stunted pause where you had to heavily resist the urge to march into the kitchen to grab a pair of scissors and snip this damn thing off—
You leaned closer to the mirror, narrowing your eyes at your own reflection. “…Okay, but—“ you tilted your head slightly, studying yourself from a different angle. “—why does it kind of work?”
You straightened a little, almost unconsciously. Your shoulders squared, your posture shifted, and something about the way you held yourself changed in an instant. You plastered on a brilliantly bright smile, and— oh my god, are those dimples?!
“Hold on—“
You turned slightly, then the other way, taking yourself in from different angles. There was something undeniably different about your presence now.
Something that made even standing still feel intentional— like you occupied space in a way you never had before.
“…I mean,” you said slowly, “if I’m going to be stuck like this…”
Your gaze drifted downward as you shifted to see yourself from a side angle. A smug grin pulls at your lips once you see the buff increase also applied to your ass.
“… it could be worse.”
The moment lingered for just a second too long before your expression flattened entirely.
“Focus,” you told yourself sharply. “This is not the time to be hot and mysterious! This is the time to panic correctly.”
With that, you tore yourself away from the mirror (not without sending one last look at your behind— holy shit, even your back is ripped!) and started pacing the room. Every step was careful— you didn’t trust your own strength not to betray you if you got careless.
“Okay, so,” you muttered, ticking points off on your fingers. “New body. Super strength. Super senses. Probably the rest of the package too. That’s— great. Love that. Big fan.”
Your gaze swept the room— and then stopped.
There, sitting on a small desk near the wall, was a phone. Plugged into a charger. Completely normal. Completely out of place.
Your breath caught.
You rushed toward it, then forced yourself to slow down halfway there, visibly reining yourself in. “Careful,” you whispered under your breath. “Gentle. You are no longer allowed to run.”
A bit strict, yeah, but you can’t run (ha) the risk of accidentally slamming through the wall and giving the neighbors a fright.
You pick up the phone like it might explode.
It didn’t.
(Maybe you should stop being such a pussy and realize that not everything is going to crack under you— maybe. Hopefully.)
The screen lit up instantly. No lock screen. Not even a password.
“…Suspicious,” you muttered, eyeing the thing like Cecil-fucking-Stedman might pop out and ask threaten you to join his team. That obviously doesn’t happen so you allow yourself to relax— only slightly though, because that old man is more slick than a greased up eel—
Your thumb hovered for a moment before tapping the screen. The display flickered to life, showing the time, the battery— and then the date.
You nearly gagged at the sudden information presented before you.
February 26th, 2021.
One month before the events of Invincible start to take place. One month before Mark Grayson gets his powers. One month before Nolan Grayson murders the Guardians of the Globe and breaks the trust of everyone around him.
You’re gonna be sick.
You lean closer, as if the proximity might somehow change what you’re seeing.
It didn’t.
The date remained exactly the same. One month before everything.
Your thoughts came too fast now, tumbling over each other.
Cities reduced to rubble.
Blood stained concrete.
That train—
You squeezed your eyes shut, shaking your head like you could dislodge the images.
“Nope! Nope, we’re not thinking about that.”
But you already were.
Because you already knew how bad it would get. You knew who was coming, what was coming— and now you were here, with powers that practically screamed Viltrumite-Level-Threat! Might as well write it across your forehead in bright red marker.
Worst of all, you have no idea how to use your fucking powers! You’ve been dropped in this absolute hellscape with no control, no training, and absolutely no clue on what you’re supposed to do.
Your breathing quickened.
“I can’t— I can’t do this,” you muttered, your voice unsteady. “I’m not a hero, I watched this from a couch. With snacks. I didn’t sign up to—“
A sharp ping cuts through your thoughts.
You suppress the urge to send your head through the nearest wall.
The air at your right side shimmered.
“Come the fuck on—“
Light fractured across empty space, assembling itself piece by piece until the now-familiar screen snapped into existence.
But this time—
It looked different.
Not just a floating message— a full interface.
Clean lines. Structured panels. Soft glowing borders that felt less like something divine and more like something ripped straight out of a video game HUD.
Text scrolled in smoothly, accompanied by a quiet chime.
[SYSTEM ONLINE]
USER SYNCHRONIZATION: Complete
POWER SET INTEGRATION: Stable
Welcome, PLAYER
You stared at the word.
“…Player?” you echoed faintly. “Oh, that’s not— no. I don’t like that. That implies mechanics. I don’t want mechanics.”
The interface did not care.
A new panel slid open to the side with a soft, satisfying click.
[PRIMARY DIRECTIVE INITIALIZED]
The text beneath it appeared one line at a time.
Objective: Establish Hero Identity
Time Limit: 30 Days
Requirements:
Gain Public Trust
Gain Recognition from Active Heroes
Achieve Positive Standing with Global Defense Agency
Your pulse spiked.
“…Excuse me?!”
Another line appeared.
Failure Condition:
Classification as Unregistered Threat.
Silence filled the room.
Your mouth opened slightly.
Closed.
Opened again.
“Oh, so you’re not even pretending this is optional.”
A soft ding responded as another panel slid into place.
[DAILY QUEST: HEROIC ENGAGEMENT]
Description: A hero is defined by action. Passive observation will result in failure.
Objectives:
Intervene in 1 Civilian Incident (0/1)
Prevent Property Damage or Injury (0/1)
Maintain Controlled Use of Power (0/1)
Optional Bonus:
Positive Civilian Reaction Recorded (0/1)
Rewards:
+1 Reputation (Local)
+1 Control
System Guidance Unlocked
Failure Penalty:
Negative Reputation Modifier
Increased Surveillance Risk
You blinked at the screen.
“…You want me to go outside?”
[CONFIRMED]
“…And do hero work.”
[CONFIRMED]
You let out a short, breathless laugh, dragging a hand down your face. “In the Invincible universe. The one where people get obliterated. That’s the one you picked.”
The interface remained perfectly still.
Unbothered.
Unmoved by your plight.
Your hand slices through the air, the screen only flickering briefly in response. Your lips curl up in a snarl as you continuously try to swipe the screen away, the words remaining unchanged.
Your other hand came up, swiping harder, more frantic. Again. Again. Again.
“Go away—!”
Your voice broke completely now, rising with panic as you tried to shove it aside, to push it out of your space, your life.
“Stop it— just— stop!”
Your hands cut uselessly through light.
The interface didn’t move.
Didn’t even react.
[QUEST TRACKING ACTIVE]
“STOP!”
The shout tore itself free from your throat, raw and desperate, echoing off of the walls.
Silence.
Your arms dropped.
The fight drained out of your body like someone had pulled a plug.
You stood there for a second longer, shaking, your breath coming in short, uneven bursts. Your vision blurred, the room warping at the edges as tears spilled over before you could stop them.
“I’m not— I’m not supposed to be here…”
That was the worst part.
Not the powers.
Not the System.
Not even the month.
The quiet, suffocating realization that everything familiar was gone.
Your home.
Your life.
Your mom.
Even the person in the mirror didn’t feel like you anymore.
“I don’t even—,” your breath stuttered, shoulders starting to shake as you pressed a hand to your face, trying and failing to hold it together. “This isn’t my body…”
The words came out in a broken whisper.
“I don’t— this isn’t mine.”
Your knees gave out before you really registered it.
You sank to the floor hard, catching yourself just enough not to crack the tile beneath you, curling in on yourself like you could somehow make all of this smaller.
Manageable.
It didn’t work.
Tears slipped freely now, hot and relentless. Your breathing uneven as panic bled into every inhale you took.
Fear.
You were scared.
“I don’t want to do this,” you whimpered, the words barely audible even to your sensitive ears. “Why me?”
The question hung in the air.
Your fingers curled weakly against the floor, your body still trembling as everything finally set in all at once— the reality, the responsibility, the impossible expectation sitting just inches from your face in the form of that damned screen.
It didn’t care.
Of course it didn’t.
It just hovered there.
Patient.
Waiting.
[OBJECTIVE REMAINS ACTIVE]
“…Yeah,” you whispered hoarsely, tears still slipping down your face. You make no move to wipe them away, your hollow gaze fixed on the glowing screen. “Of course it does.”
You let your head fall forward to rest against your arm, eyes squeezing shut like that might block it all out.
It didn’t…
Nothing did.
After a while— seconds, minutes, you didn’t know— your breathing started to slow. Not steady, your throat still caught every so often.
Just… less jagged.
You didn’t get back up.
Didn’t argue again.
Didn’t try to swipe the screen away.
You just laid there on the floor, feeling small in a body that felt too strong for you, staring at nothing as the weight of everything settled in.
You didn’t bother denying it anymore— this was real, and no amount of screaming or crying was going to change that.
═══════
The System had the decency to let you wallow in self pity for another half hour. You stayed slumped on the floor, your tears having dried out a while ago. A petulant pout stuck itself to your face as your body trembled just enough to remind you that you were still alive.
You let yourself breathe, small, shaky breaths, trying to convince yourself that the world hadn’t completely collapsed— just your personal world, your body, your future.
A sharp ding cut through the quiet.
You raised your head, fully prepared to cuss the System out for interrupting your little pity party.
The HUD glimmered again, impossibly bright in the dim room.
[SIDE QUEST ASSIGNED]
Your stomach lurched.
Objective: Prepare for Your First Day at the Daily Planet
Description: You are to integrate into your designated occupation to establish a cover identity.
Requirements:
Don professional attire suitable for office duties.
Arrive at workplace before 9:00AM
Maintain composure during first interactions with colleagues
Rewards:
+Reputation (Local)
+Public Recognition
+ [DAILY PLANET] Fondness
Your jaw dropped.
The world snapped into sharp focus. Your pity party evaporated instantly, mind racing as adrenaline floods your veins.
“No, no, no, no, no!” you shouted, scrambling to your feet. The room seemed impossibly small all of a sudden, furniture threatening to block your path as you made a mad dash towards the wardrobe.
Your hands gripped the glass knobs of the doors and flung them open, eyes darting across hangers and drawers.
Clothes. You needed clothes. Work clothes.
Your fingers flew over shirts, jackets, skirts, slacks, your mind moving faster than your body as you tried to find something professional. Fuck, you worked as a god damn librarian in your past life where the only dress code was to be dressed! You had no idea what shirt went with what skirt, or if heels are the only acceptable footwear.
You needed to find something professional, something you could survive wearing. Something that wouldn’t scream alien monstrosity disguised as human.
You yanked out a crisp white button-up and froze, staring at it. “…I… can I wear this? Is this even— does this even fit this stupid body?!”
Of course it fit.
Your new body was built differently, and the shirt clung in all the wrong—and right— places, but there was no time to freak out over it. You shoved it on, fumbling with the buttons, muttering curses under your breath the whole time.
You grabbed a blazer next, a pair of slacks, shoes— black flats that looked fairly comfortable— and tried to assemble an outfit that wouldn’t stick out too much.
All the while, the System’s screen stayed stubbornly by your side. It displayed a clock that was slowly ticking down to 9:00AM.
One hand mussed up your hair as the other adjusted the collar of the shirt for the third time in thirty seconds.
You carefully played with the strands to hide the pronounced curl that still fucking refused to blend in with the rest of it—
“Oh!”
A pair of light red glasses stared up at you innocently, like they weren’t the one thing that pulled this whole thing off. You paid no mind to how perfectly they were placed or how they fit the curve of your face— you were just happy that this whole thing might not go up in flames yet.
The System made sure to have you grab a lanyard and a briefcase, both tucked neatly by the front door.
The door slammed shut behind you as you rushed out into the hallway, almost crushing some poor guy against the wall.
“Sorry,” you called out over your shoulder, already speed-walking down the hall. “In a rush!”
The man grumbled some curses after you but you couldn’t make them out properly over the racing of your own heart.
Harrington!reader who struck up a friendship with Billy after finding him crying. It wasn’t long until she developed a crush on the older boy. But she knew she was the least attractive girl in school, and on the cheerleading squad. Every girl was all over him, she never thought he’d see her that way.
Movie Night
I'm so sorry, I got carried away, and I made it super long, SO I HOPE YOU ENJOY AND I HOPE EVERYONE ELSE DOES
this has: fluff, angst, mean brother persona on Steve's behalf, OOC Billy Hargrove, soft side.
wc: 8k (i got a lil inspired, no one requests Billy and I love to write him 😭)
You understand, you get it, the fucking sister of Steve Harrington should be the perfect girl, perfect as her idiotic brother. If only they knew that being in every single sport isn’t what Steve wants, it isn’t what he desires, it isn’t what he always dreamed about.
But it’s not that perfection they want from you, oh no. It’s not your fault you have bad eye sight so you have to wear glasses, and for some reason that made you fucking undesirable. Just because you are wearing glasses, and you’ve been wearing them ever since middle school, where there were minimum problems with it, and now in high school when you just want to be able to date someone, or even kiss, it’s almost impossible because of them.
So yes, you knew people didn’t want to be with you, and you knew that it was all because of the idealization of the Harrington girl not meeting their expectations. Jokes on them, every single fucking guy in school looks like stepped on shit.
When you finally got into freshmen year, you already knew Steve was the most popular guy in school, always boosting about it at the dinner table, father always saying how proud he is for Steve being the captain of almost every fucking imaginable sport. You looked up to Steve, you really did look up to your brother… Until you crossed those forsaken high school doors, and the only face your brother sent you was that of disgust and turned his back on you.
And that sets your fate.
Now as a Junior, your brother finally graduates this year. Ever since he started dating Nancy who is in the same year as you, he has relatively changed. At home, he now tries to invite you to hang with him at the mall, or tell you to have dinner together when your parents aren’t home… You declined his invitation every time. You prefer to eat dinner in your bed, alone, while he drives away to be with Nancy. Just you, your books, and some good music. You are fine.
It doesn’t help the fact that you have just one friend at school, and she’s not even always with you because she is Nancy’s Best Friend. Barb was always nice to you, and it’s the only one you talked to in class, because then in cheerleading practice, which you had to enter because you needed extracurricular credit because your parents said so, you were given the cold shoulder by every teammate there. You didn’t participate in the cheers really, you just wear the uniform every now and then and pass them bottles of water.
You just have to survive one year, just one more year and you can go to college, probably start anew, meet people, meet someone. You fixed your glasses on the bridge of your nose as you took notes while sitting at the bleachers, hearing the squeak of the tennis shoes of all the boys in the basketball team just going around. You hear a thump, making your eyes look up to see your brother laying on the floor, making you frown.
Then it made sense, as Billy Hargrove smirked, helping your brother stand up again.
You knew that he wanted to take Steve’s position as the most popular guy at school, getting prom king and all that shit. You have heard your brother complaining about him on the phone sometimes, maybe to Nancy or to one of his friends. From what you’ve seen, Billy looked like a tough and irritating guy, and there is no need for you to get close to him at all, and you really could care less about what he does to your brother.
And that is basically your everyday life. Invisible, and you’re fine with that.
You’re fine.
“Hey, can you believe that guy?” Your head snapped up to see your brother at your door, leaning against the frame with his arms crossed over his chest. You raised your eyebrow at him, looking back down at your book. “If he takes away my captainship in the team, I will– Dad will fucking cut my head off.”
“That’s what you get for following his dreams from day one.” You mumble in a low tone, but he caught onto it, frowning at you.
“I have my own dreams. I don’t follow his.” You nodded at that while still not looking at him. You really could care two shits about all of this.
“Maybe Nancy can help you with this kinda stuff. I'm busy.” You heard shuffling at the door and then a sigh. You heard steps and you raised your head to hear him slam his door shut, and you knew he was probably getting ready to go to a party or something because of the music he started playing on his radio. Not once you were invited to one of those, not even by your own brother. He had hosted parties before, and you were commanded to stay in your room all night. The only time you came out of your room was to the bathroom to pee, and even then you had to wait because people were always making out inside.
You got up from bed, closed the biology book to then set it on your desk, looking over to your library of VHS’s tilting your head to check what to watch tonight. You picked Terms of Endearment and Sixteen Candles. Your collection was full of romance and dramatic movies because it’s just your favorite genre to watch. Same with your books, your favorite being Sense & Sensibility.
Steve left after a few minutes, and you made your way down to start your Friday movie night, and tomorrow will be the same, next weekend too. You should get more movies, you are on a roll of rewatching stuff by now. But it was at this moment, when you put the cassette into your player, and you finally sat down and started watching Sixteen Candles that it all simply fell apart.
Your rough facade crumbles down as you see the romance of the characters on screen, the friendship that is displayed in these movies, late calls with friends, kicking your feet because the guy you liked kissed you, or even called you to spend time with you. You stare absentmindedly at the screen as you see the kissing scene finally happening and your fingertips brush over your lips, just softly, tracing the shape of them.
After a few hours Steve finally returns home, completely sober and cursing under his breath. He sees the light of the living room turned on and some blue light shining on. He walked inside to find you asleep on the couch with the TV still on. He sighed, walking over to turn it off but then his eyes looked at your form, making his face completely fall down.
He bent over your figure to see the dried tears on your cheeks, falling down onto the couch. He looked over to the coffee table to look at what you were watching, getting hold of the case. You watch the same movie every Friday night… And every Saturday night. He rubbed his mouth with a frown to his face as he looked back at your frame. And he always repeats the same action every Friday night and every Saturday night.
He stands up to grab the blanket that’s over the couch to put it over your body, and with tears in his eyes he bends over to press a soft kiss at the top of your head with a quiet whisper that he always repeats and that you never hear, not that you would believe him anyway.
“I’m sorry.”
Monday came way faster than you expected, and the morning was even quicker. Your parents were still away on their business trip, but Steve and you knew they were just out on vacation by themselves. Why have children when you just push them aside?
You take out the lunch bag with your sandwiches in it, and you walk out of the school doors and into the football field which was deserted because it was lunch time, so it always gave you the best opportunity to head behind the bleachers to have some peaceful time for yourself, and that was until you almost dropped your bag as you screamed and flinched when you saw someone already there who snapped his head back at you.
Billy Hargrove.
Your breathing was heavy and your eyes were still trying to focus from the scare but as soon as they did you realized that Billy’s eyes were filled with tears, one or two might have escaped because you could see the glistening trail that they left behind on his cheeks. You were trying to talk to him, but then his eyebrows furrowed together, a tight angry look on his face.
“The fuck you looking at Harrington?” You flinched back at that, annoyance switching inside of you instead of fear. This guy was crying and has the audacity to sound threatening?
“Oh, right, sorry, it’s just seeing Billy Hargrove actually having feelings is a sight.” His eyes snapped wide at your response, surprise crossing his features while he stared at you this time. “Who’s staring now?”
“Oh, right, sorry, it’s just that hearing you fucking talk for once is a sight.” You were taken aback by his response, mimicking yours. You sucked on your right cheek in annoyance as he wiped his cheeks away.
“Well, off you go.” He snaps his head at you, a frown on his features to then letting a smirk spread on his lips.
“I came here first. You go.” You scoff at that, shaking your head at him.
“No, I always come here at lunchtime, it’s my place.”
“Well, that’s lonely as fuck.” You know that. You fucking know that, he doesn’t need to say it to your face, not the heartthrob of the school. Before your heart could turn in pain you nod at him.
“Fine, take it for today.” You turn to finally walk away. Maybe you can eat at the picnic table in the forest? But sometimes the stoner would go there to deal, and you weren’t judging Munson really, you gotta do what you gotta do to survive.
“Wait.” You stopped on your tracks and slowly turned around to see Billy slumping down on the ground, his back resting against a column of the bleachers while he rested his forearms on his bent knees. “You can stay here if you don’t tell anyone you saw me like this.”
Who would you even tell this to? He might be scared that you would tell Steve about it, but Billy seems to not know you don’t actually have a good relationship with your brother, and you have just one casual friend in this school. You look in between the bleachers and towards the woods and then you look back at Billy, giving a sigh and finally sitting down with your legs crossed.
It was silent between you two, almost uncomfortable but not quite. You were eating your sandwich and you took out a bottle of water out of your bag too. You glanced once at him, and he was looking at the distance, just breathing slowly. You wanted to know what happened to him, because he didn’t seem like the guy that would cry easily. He looked at you, raising an eyebrow up at you.
“Why do you eat here?” He asks and you clear your throat, taking a sip of your water.
“Why were you crying?”
“Touché.” You gave a nod in understanding. You weren’t going to talk to him if he wasn’t going to talk to you. You looked inside your bag to grab onto the other sandwich, and you handed it to him. He looked at it with a frown and then back at you.
“If you’re here it means you didn’t eat. Basketball players need food.” You calmly say to him and he looks down at the sandwich, taking it from your hands, and then taking a bite out of it, grimacing in disgust.
“What the fuck is in this?” He looks down into it and you smirk at him, finishing off your own.
“Mustard and pickle sandwich.”
He ate the sandwich anyway. It was nice to eat lunch with someone for once, even if that person was Billy Hargrove and it would be a one time thing in your life… Though, it wasn’t. Billy was back behind the bleachers almost everyday after that. He wasn’t at all that persona that he was with everyone else with you. The cocky insufferable bastard you knew was all a mask, and you could see it when he told you about how Tammy Thompson tried to hide a fart with her cough in class.
“You’re fucking kidding…” You were giggling, covering your mouth as you both sat in front of one another, and the closeness slowly shrinking as two weeks went by of eating lunch with him.
“I am not, she actually thought it was discreet, but I heard it. Not that I said anything about it, but it was a total boner killer.” You raised an eyebrow at that, swallowing your apple that you were having as dessert.
“What, girls can’t fart Hargrove?” He rolls his eyes at you and then raises his hand to flick your forehead, making you wince and rub the skin he left in a red state.
“I didn’t say that. When you trust someone enough to do it in their face, sure. Not in the middle of class, and much less when you are a chair in front of mine.” At that you let out a laugh, throwing your head back. He chuckled and took a swig of his cigarette, blowing the smoke to the side so it wouldn’t hit your face.
“God, I really don’t pay attention to shit like that.” You took another bite of your apple and Billy was still looking at you, clearing his throat, making you look up at him.
“What do you do on Friday nights? I mean, your brother is at every single party but you are nowhere to be found.” He asks you and you feel your cheeks flush slightly at that. You look down at your apple and swallow your bite.
“I often watch movies. Have my own movie nights, sometimes with popcorn, and if I am feeling fancy, S’mores.” You gave him a small smile as you took another sip of water but Billy was still looking at you with a frown to his eyebrows.
“By yourself?” And you suddenly felt embarrassment washing over you. How pathetic were you? He is a guy that has every student in this school eating at the palm of his hand, plans of going out somewhere almost everyday, a date every single night, and you just watched movies and read books for company.
“I– I have to go.” You suddenly blurt out, standing up abruptly to then wipe your jeans from the dirt of the floor. Billy was following suit, doing the same thing, and about to stop you, but you were already walking away. You didn’t need the reminder of how stupid all of your life sounded. You didn’t need it from him. You were always reminded of it by your father, saying that you should be more like his son. Your mother says that at her age she already dated someone and had tons of friends. Steve showing off his new relationship and friends to you, keeping you in the shadows from everyone.
You didn’t need more reminders.
So when you got home, and realized Steve was already out of sight, probably at Heather’s party, you took your time to shower, put on some comfy sweatpants, a white t-shirt and a gray hoodie, and you grabbed your movies and went downstairs. Maybe they will cheer you up from all the stuff that has happened with Billy today. It’s stupid, you both don’t talk to each other all day, yet at lunch you just talk non-stop.
Sweet popcorn was today’s choice and you were already salivating at the smell of it all. Once it was done you put it in a bowl and headed over to the living room, turning the TV on, and putting Pretty in Pink in your VHS. Steve must be getting drunk with his friends by now, dancing to Roxette or something like that. You popped a single popcorn in your mouth and you were about to press play but you were interrupted when glass knocking was heard from the sliding door to the garden.
You jumped up in fear, eyes widened as you quickly turned your head and saw Billy fucking Hargrove outside the doors. You blinked once, twice, three times. Wasn’t he at Heather’s party too? You stood up from your seat, blushing at your attire but he already saw you in it, no time to actually go change. You fixed your glasses at the bridge of your nose as you walked towards the doors to finally unlock them and open a side for him.
“What the fuck are you doing here Billy!” You almost screamed at him, but he raised his hands up in a surrender mode and chuckled at you.
“By that yelling I am assuming your parents are still gone. Let me in, I’m fucking freezing.” He walks past you and you scoff at the nerve of this man. You close the door and you see him looking around with his hands inside his black leather jacket. Your eyes trailed downwards for a second, taking in how tight his pants were, but you snapped out of it, walking around him so that you were facing him.
“What are you doing here?” You ask again and he simply shrugs, still looking all around your house.
“Party was lame as shit, and you said there was a movie night here tonight. That seemed far more interesting than Tommy trying to do a keg stand and falling onto it, breaking his nose.” He walks to the couch, sitting down on it and he immediately grabs the bowl of popcorn from the coffee table. Your mouth hangs open again at this, going to the couch and sitting down next to him.
“You– I don’t need your pity.” You say to him, looking down at your hands as you played with the hem of the sleeves of your hoodie. He chuckles at that and shakes his head.
“Sweetheart, I don’t pity anyone. The party was really fucking boring.” He takes a popcorn in his mouth and he hums at the sweetness. You raise an eyebrow to look at him. You never thought Billy Hargrove would be on the sweet side of stuff. “So, what are we watching?”
A smirk formed on your lips. He was gonna fucking hate it, that’s what he gets for barging in your house.
Yet–
“I fucking hated Duckie.” You were wide eyed at him. He had paid complete attention to the movie, even giving small commentary that he really liked the fact that the girl stood up for herself. He turns to look at you, a frown coming to his eyebrows. “What?”
“I just… I didn’t think you like this genre of movies.” You reply to him, a little bit nervous for some reason and he smiles at you and then looks back at the screen.
“I never watched one of these. They have a lot of plot, and they’re interesting.” Your eyes sparkled in excitement and you grabbed his shoulder, which made him look at you alarmingly.
“You’re in for a ride.”
Billy came back again the next day, taking the chance that Steve was out at Nancy’s for the night. He then sneaked into your room while Steve slept and you played Grease on your small TV and VHS that were on top of your dresser. He actually enjoyed it, but despised it because it was a musical. The next time, he actually came through the front door, and you both finally watched Sixteen Candles together. Now, Saturday Night, Steve was at Nancy’s for a family dinner and Billy was taking out two beers from the six pack he came with.
“I don’t drink…” You say to him and he raises an eyebrow up at you.
“Daily or weekly, but you have tried alcohol. One beer is not going to kill you Sweetheart.” You nodded at that and you grabbed onto the can, sitting back down on the couch. You opened it as Billy walked towards you and plopped down with a huff, already taking a swig out of his can. You grimaced at yours and you took a tentative sip, lowering the can to look at him, completely disgusted by the taste and he simply threw his head back in laughter.
“Disgusting.” You say to him and he shrugs at you, sending a smile your way.
“It’s an acquired taste baby, you just keep drinking it, if you feel fuzzy you can leave it.” You felt your heart accelerate at him, feeling the butterflies exploding in your stomach. You didn’t know when your relationship with Billy took a turn for the better, but he actually sends a smile your way this time when walking down the halls, he sometimes greets you when you pass by him in the hallways, like he is not making it seem like he doesn’t know you.
So it was hard not to fall for him. It was undeniable at this point, and even if he was strong and mean, and an ultimate bully to everyone else, he comes here to your house, watches romantic comedies with you, eats popcorn with you, and you two talk about nonsense all evening. Nobody knows about this, and you’re happy to have this secret between the two of you. You can live in the fantasy a little bit longer.
“What did you bring?” You look at the cassette he got and you look at the front of it. You grimaced again and showed it to him. “The terminator?”
“Classic sweetheart, it’s an action movie, you gotta expand your movie knowledge a bit.” You didn’t want to complain, it was the first time Billy suggested to watch something he likes, and in reality you were interested in knowing it, and hopefully like it the way he does.
News flash, you didn’t like it.
“Why are there so many guns?! It's unnecessary!” You complain, your beer gone and you do feel a little fuzzy but not too much. You just felt giddy. He laughed at your side and shook his head as he drank his second can.
“That’s what action movies are, baby, they are irrational, little to nothing of plot, and shooting everywhere.” He says and you sigh at that, shaking your head. The room filled with silence as Billy looked forward, his smile slowly disappearing. “You know why I come here often?”
You straightened at that, blinked with confusion as you turned to look at him. You frowned when you saw how serious he got, just out of nowhere, and your belly turned for him, not in a romantic way, but more of a worry kind of nervousness.
“Because parties now bore you?” You ask him and he gives you one chuckle and then shakes his head, resting it on the backrest of the couch, looking at the ceiling.
“You help me distract myself.” He took a deep breath in as you kept looking at him and you knew it was something he was having a hard time talking about. “The day you saw me crying… I was actually afraid.”
“What?”
“My father… Let’s just say he has– a rough hand. Any slip up I make, I just get a punch out of it… I’m just so angry all the time, so unlike my fucking self and who I actually am when I am at school. I just let out my anger towards people, because I cannot take it out on my own father.” You could see his Adam's apple bobbing up and down, and you knew he was trying to choke back tears as he talked. Your heart just knotted at seeing him like this, feeling helpless, not knowing what to actually tell him.
“Billy–”
“And you… I tried to be mean to you… And you actually had the guts that no one had at this school yet. Talk back to me.” His head turned to finally look at you again and your eyes burned at his confession. “I couldn’t be mean to you… With you I can— I can be calm, watch a movie, talk about how creepy that Creel house is and how we should sabotage it– I mean, the only thing I talk with the people from school? Chicks, sex, cars, alcohol.”
You couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on your lips, turning your whole body to face him, your legs coming to rest on top of the couch too, bending them and resting your side on the backrest.
“Well, I am glad I could help in some way… My house is always open for you Billy.” His eyes were just staring into yours now, the only thing being heard in the room were your breaths, until he finally talked.
“Can I kiss you?”
What?
There is no possible way you heard that from him. This is a dream, it has to be a dream. There is no way Billy Hargrove, your now friend, your crush, the guy you like has asked to actually kiss you. This only happens in movies, in books, and it never happens in real life, at least, not to you.
“W-Why would you want to kiss me?” And Billy’s features turned into saddened ones at your words. Don’t you realize how beautiful you are? He straightened up on the couch, his body turning to face you as well as both of your hearts jumped out of your chest.
“Why wouldn’t I want to kiss you?” was his short answer. Your belly turned in pure nervousness now as your body grew a cold sweat. You never kissed anyone, and Billy seemed to know how to do it, and you were just too inexperienced. A flush came over all of your body as you fixed the glasses on the bridge of your nose and you looked down to avoid his gaze.
“I– I never–” You gulped, not being able to finish the phrase from how stupid it sounded. A warm hand was pressed on your cheek, making you lift your head up to look at him again, and you didn’t realize how close he got to you, his blue eyes staring into yours.
“I ask you again… Can I kiss you?” And you finally give him a nod. You weren’t going to miss this chance, not for one second. He still wants to kiss you despite you not knowing what you were getting yourself into. He smiled at you and grabbed onto your glasses, pulling them off your face and setting them on the coffee table. “They were just going to get in the way.”
You took a shaky breath in, his hand still on your cheek as he slowly leaned down towards you. You closed your eyes and his remained open to remember your features as he finally does what he has been wanting to do for the past weeks. At first it was a simple attraction of course, but he knew it was more than that, and he was scared as shit about it… But he never wanted someone as much as he’s been wanting you.
His lips connected with yours in a soft peck, brief, and you let a breath go out of your lips, only for another peck to land. Then another, then another that lingered there a bit more, and then the next one he just stayed there, and suddenly started moving his lips, guiding you as your heartbeat made you deaf in your ears. How do people do this and not faint at the spot?
The lip smacking was heard in the room as your hands finally were brave enough to travel, one scanning his bicep, the other one moving towards the back of his neck, feeling his skin under your fingertips. His free hand landed on your waist, not pressing too hard so that you know that he is being mindful of you. At this point, Billy would already be inside someone, satisfying his needs, but with you… He wasn’t going to do that, at least not now, not yet, and that is if you let him.
He wants to take care of you.
He pulled away for a second, his lips touching yours still as your breathing mixed with one another’s in soft pants. You were feeling as if you were burning all over, not knowing what was happening with you. You never felt like this before, and maybe it has to do with the fact that not only was Billy good looking, but you also feel more than just friendship for him.
“You okay?” You nod frantically at him, wanting more, giving him a peck on the lips making him chuckle in a low tone. “Sorry baby, but I need more.”
He suddenly pushed you back on the couch, crawling over you and you didn’t even think, you just wrapped your arms around his shoulders, and he kept his bottom half away from yours, even if it pained him on his thighs from the strength he was doing to keep himself up. His lips connected with yours again, rougher this time, more desperate, the kiss suddenly turning into a very heated one as he suddenly licks your bottom lip a few times.
The butterflies in your belly explode as you open your mouth and his tongue finally slides in. You gasp at the feeling, your hands finding his biceps through his blouse, and you felt his chain hitting your neck at every movement. One hand was still gripping on your waist, while the other remained at your nape, pulling you deeper into the kiss.
You really can’t believe this is happening, not to you, not with Billy, it doesn’t make sense that he looked your way, it doesn’t make sense that he actually wants to kiss you, not when he has Heather on his tail all the time, or Carol even if she is dating Tommy. Or Janet. You always hear them talking about him in the bathroom, always planning their move on him, and this feels you with a sense of power, with a sense of accomplishment and pride in yourself.
Your hands ran through his hair and he groaned into the kiss, and that ignited so many things inside of you that you never felt in your life, and you wanted to hear more of it. Billy was trying his best to keep himself in a hovering position with you, but he was finding it harder and harder to do so. He can’t go on, at least not today when it was your first kiss. He didn’t want to scare you, even if your urges were the same as his, because he could feel your need to pull him even closer.
The door suddenly clicked and both of your eyes snapped wide open, pulling away, looking at one another, panting heavily. Best scenario, it's your parents, and they would be thrilled that you actually, and finally, have someone over at your house… Now, worst case scenario–
“What the ACTUAL FUCK?!” You both sat up on the couch to look over at Steve, who was standing there in the living room, wide eyed, and his face reddened bit by bit. Shit.
“Steve–” You started talking but he raised his hand at you, to then point a finger at Billy.
“Get the fuck off my sister.” You wanted to roll your eyes at this, because why is he acting all protective now? You finally got some action in your fucking life and he wants to take it away from you.
“I don’t think she wants me to leave.” Billy dares to say, glaring at your brother who took a look at the coffee table, seeing the cans of beer. His mind started racing, and Billy followed his gaze, his mouth opening to talk but Steve was running up the stairs already. Your eyes widened and you pushed Billy off, standing up quickly and urging him to do the same.
“You have to leave!” You were trying to push Billy towards the front door but his feet were still planted against the floor with a frown to his face, and your head snapped to the stairs to see Steve running back down with his baseball bat in his hands. Billy’s eyes widen when Steve starts to approach him with a swinging motion.
“Taking fucking advantage of my sister is something I won’t take from you Hargrove, so get the fuck out of my house before I crush your skull in!”
“Shit, Harrington– Fucking listen for a second–” Steve’s baseball bat hits the backrest of the couch, and you could see the dent of the wooden under it that he created. Billy ripped himself off you and gave you a look as if asking if you were okay.
“I’ll talk to him, you go.” You tell him and he gulps, looking back at Steve with a threatening look on his face which Steve only scoffed at.
“I’ll talk to you later.” Billy says with a small squeeze to your hand as he walks out of the house, passing by Steve. Your brother follows him to the front door and he doesn’t walk back inside until Billy drives away with his Camaro. After the roaring engine can be heard in the distance, Steve slams the door shut, throwing the bat at the floor and stomping back into the living room where you were standing there with a glare on your eyes as if you were about to kill him.
“When I saw his fucking car out in front of the house I thought it was a stupid coincidence, and I come in here to see you about to have sex with the sluttiest man in the goddamn school! What are you thinking!?” You frown in anger at that, stepping towards him.
“I am his friend! I wasn’t going to have sex with him, and he wasn’t taking fucking advantage of me! I drank ONE beer, ONE!” You yell back at him and he fake laughs as he runs his hand over his face.
“The first time you have a guy in this house, and it is Billy FUCKING Hargrove. The one guy that I am fighting with for Captain at our basketball team, the one guy that gives me the hardest fucking time of my life at the moment, and you want me to just accept that he wants to be with you because he WANTS TO?” Your chest hurt at those words, your own coming out in soft stutters at Steve’s blind rage.
“He even asked me if I wanted to, and I said yes–”
“God, you cannot be this fucking stupid! He hates me, makes my life a living hell, and you seriously think that he is a nice guy!? You really think there is no ulterior motive!?” He yelled at you and his words were stabbing you in every part of your body, your head already spinning from how harsh he was being with you.
“Why? Is it impossible that he actually wants to be with me?” You try to say loudly at him, even if your fingers start to feel numb. He scoffed at that, looking at you.
“Yes, and I don’t think you are dumb enough to not see that.” He was referring to so many other things, and it was regarding Billy’s persona, in Billy’s actions, in his rivalry with him… And when he saw your tear rolling down your face, his anger evaporated as if water was being thrown at him.
“Okay…” Was your defeated response. You turned around to retrieve your glasses from your coffee table and Steve winced, clenching his eyes tightly together as pain rushed through his body.
“That wasn’t what I meant– Hey, listen to me, I really didn’t mean it to sound like that–” But you weren’t listening, putting the cassettes back into their cases and turning off the TV. You grabbed them and walked past him, going up into your room. Steve stood there, knowing he hurt you once again, not knowing what to do but run a hand through his hair, cursing under his breath as he started pacing back and forth.
He didn’t mean it to sound like no guy would want you, he didn’t mean it at all like that, yet the words coming out of his mouth betrayed him, completely. He doesn’t know how to make it up to you, because if he had given you the chance to go to the parties with him when you asked in your freshman year, many times, and told you yes instead of no, you would have more experiences, you might even have friends. If only he had let you come out of your room at his own parties when you asked him, almost begged him to let you participate, but he declined each time. Then in your sophomore year, you didn’t ask anymore, just accepted that he wasn’t going to tell you anymore about them, and you automatically locked the door whenever he hosted a party.
This year, he tried to invite you, many times. You always declined. You didn’t even want to eat dinner with him, and he knows you want to leave the house as soon as possible thanks to him. Even with your parents. For the past two years he had been so blind because of his father’s approval and the one of all the students in Hawkins High that he didn’t notice how your parents didn’t ask you stuff at dinner. All questions were always directed to him. He noticed this year, and he tried to tell them you had nailed your exams, and the only thing you got from your father was ‘As she should.’
He was the cause of who you were now. Not at all the bubbly and animated girl that asked him to raise her up like an airplane in their backyard, not at all the small girl that put makeup on him pretending she was a stylist, not at all the middle school girl that got excited to see him whenever she got home from school to tell him about what she learned that day.
He walked up the stairs and raised his hand to knock on your door, only to hear soft sobs on the other side, muffled. He wonders if you had also cried when he denied you all those times. He doesn’t know how to even make it up to you. He doesn’t know if he even can.
So the next day, when you didn’t come out of your room, he let you have your alone time. Now on Monday he tried knocking on your door, only to receive the notice that you felt sick. He tried walking in but your door was completely locked. His eyebrows twitched and his mind had come up with a plan. A plan he will terribly hate. A plan that might end up badly for him. But it’s what he deserves for what he did to you.
Billy looked everywhere for you, and even asked Barbara Holland where you could be. She told him that she hadn’t seen her at Science that day either, so his best guess was that you had skipped school. His jaw clenched when he asked other people about you and some of them didn’t even know what you looked like. He waited for the bell to ring, and he was going to tumble Steve down if he had to in order to see you. He didn’t care.
But when he walked out of the school doors to rush to his Camaro, he was surprised to see Steve Harrington sitting on his trunk with his arms crossed. Billy’s eyes hardened at the sight, walking towards him, tilting his head in question at the brown haired boy who was looking at Billy with a mix of emotions behind his eyes.
“Harrington. Get off my fucking car.” He says and Steve gulps as he looks to the side.
“I fucked up.” At that Billy’s eyebrows turned into a frown, but his fists started clenching as Steve kept talking, telling him everything, everything he did to you, and what he had said to you that night when Billy left.
While this was happening, you were combing your hair after the shower you took while sitting on your bed. You had taken a shower because you were greasy from yesterday already, and you really didn't want to get up, but you didn’t have a choice. Ever since Steve said that, you didn’t have the guts to actually call Billy because at some far away place in your mind, it made sense.
You were invisible, and suddenly you were noticed? It doesn’t sound real.
So maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it really was to get into your pants to mess with your brother, and that was honestly the most reasonable explanation for it. You frowned when you heard the door open downstairs, your door was left open so you could hear some drawers being open, to then hear steps coming up the stairs. Your eyes widened when you saw Steve slamming himself against the door frame of your room.
His eye was completely inflamed from a punch received to the face, his nose was bleeding and he was holding some ice covered in a rug to soak the blood in it. From what you could see, his lip was busted as well and his breathing was coming out of his mouth, almost in a pant.
“Steve, what happened?” Even in your hatred for him, seeing him this way made your heart fill with worry, pushing all of the other feelings aside. You were about to rise from the bed until Steve raised his hand up at you.
“I deserved it.” He looked towards the hallway and your eyes widened when you saw Billy coming into view, a pack of frozen peas on his right hand, his eyes glaring at Steve as he passed by him and into your room. His eyes turned to yours and you couldn’t help but look up at him, completely stunned. Steve groans and closes the door for you two as he heads downstairs.
“What… Did you…?” You stutter as you sit back on your bed, seeing Billy’s injured hand as he sat on your bed too, nodding as he looked at you.
“I sure as hell did. Fucker deserved it. He told me everything, from the very beginning, and also what he said to you on Saturday night right after I left.” You feel your face flush with embarrassment and you look down at your hands again. You are not understanding what is going on, nor why Steve would go and tell your life story to Billy. “Though I have to say… Your brother does care for you.” You scoff at that.
“Right. Like he cared for me the past two years.” You reply with venom in your voice and you feel Billy scoot closer to you.
“He knows. He knows what he did to you. Your freshman year was the punch on the eye, your sophomore year was on his lip… And what he said on Saturday was the one on the nose.” He lets out a chuckle and you feel mixed emotions to that. You were happy that he defended your honor, but Steve was still your brother and you didn’t want physical harm to come to him.
“Don’t punch him again… Please.” You slowly looked up at Billy and his blue eyes were already looking at you. Your heart rate picked up the longer he stared at you.
“Do you really believe what he said to you that night?” He asks you, a small worried tone behind his voice. You feel yourself gulp and you look away in embarrassment or nervousness, you no longer know.
“I– After years of feeling this way, it was a very possible scenario.” You say to him in a low voice, your fingers playing with each other. You see him put the bag of peas away, and his hands look for yours. You look down to see his right hand completely bruised up, some skin completely chipped off on his knuckles. You gasp at that and his hold gets stronger on you, making you look up at him. He was closer now, making your breathing get stuck in your throat.
“How can I prove to you that I want you? How can I prove to you that I like you, that I like you very much that I drive myself insane with this fucking feeling, because god knows I am not good with relationships…” For the first time you see a blush come to his cheeks, and his gaze looks down at your connected hands, like how you do when you get nervous. “But I wanna try that with you.”
Your heart leapt out of your mouth almost, not truly believing what was happening, but the bruised knuckles made it more real, the blush on his cheeks made you realize it was no dream at all. This man in front of you wants you, despite it all, and you both have so many broken pieces to pick up inside one another, but you figure that you can help each other. You can mend his heart back, as he can mend yours.
“I think… The first step would be a date…” You say to him almost in a whisper and he chuckles as he looks up at you. He squints slightly at that as if in thought as your smile grows on your face while looking at him.
“I have an idea for it. I think they are showcasing the new Rambo movie.” He says to you with a smirk to his face and your mouth fell open at that, shaking your head.
“I am not watching an action movie on our first date!” He chuckles at that, his face coming closer to yours slowly, and you feel magnetized to him as you both leaned into one another.
“Oh, I bet you prefer the one where the bad boy goes for the intelligent and perfect girl, that genre, right?” You squint at him, pretending to be offended by his words.
“Don’t act like you don’t like those movies Hargrove.” At that he chuckles, his left hand snaking to the back of your neck to pull you closer to him, a soft breath hitting your lips as he talks.
“I might have a thing for romance.” His lips touched yours again, and you smiled through the kiss, your own hands resting on the back of his head to pull him deeper into the kiss, to taste him even better. Your lips moved along with his, taking in eachother’s breaths, bodies coming closer at each second.
“Don’t fuck my sister, I draw the line there. Not today, not with me here.” You both heard Steve’s voice behind the door, making Billy groan in annoyance and pull away from you to glare at the door as the steps could be heard and another door closes down the hallway.
“I am punching him again.” Billy says and you were glaring at the door too.
“My turn.”
A/N: Well shit, I hope you enjoyed. IT TURNED OUT TO BE A ONE SHOT.
