Plethoring @ysadalawa - Tumblr Blog

I take comfort in the fact that my pain is not profound. That this plight is share d by many. By no means is it encouraging or helpful in any sense of the word - comforting, nonetheless.

Five years ago, i would have been sorry. Sorry that I’m me. That I’m an asshole in your eyes, that I am narcissistic, self-absorbed, self-torturing brat who does not see other people’s pain beyond my own - especially that which I have caused.

Now, I am only sorry for half those things. I feel wretched and filled with guilt every damn day for causing pain. But I’m no longer sorry for being me - the parts that’s bursting through the seams and the parts that barely reach the minimum.

It’s an understatement I didn’t turn out to be the person you wanted me to be. Well, flash news, you didn’t put in the time for me to turn out undamaged. But no, I am done putting the blame on anyone, because all things considering, I actually like how I turned out. I am just me, and for a while now, I have been liking myself a lot and loving myself either way on the days that I don’t.

This is really crappy writing. I don’t care. It’s here and that’s that.

hindi bat nahanap na ang mga sulok na labis ang tinik

ngunit ang luha ay sadya paring bumuhos

parang buhangin na ang munting alon ay sinasabik

upang ang gusot at hinagpis ay mairaos

May 4, 2017 4:16 PM

My heart is so small, yet so incredibly full.

The past few days have gotten me feeling very inspired - about the world, about myself and about possibilities.

aseaofquotes

Carson McCullers, The Ballad of the Sad Café

aseaofquotes

Brad Barkley / Heather Hepler, Dream Factory

I sometimes find myself peeved at certain girls. I don’t like that I’m a hater, honestly. It makes me feel old and bitter and quite frankly, very lame. But I can’t help it.

I realise one common thing these girls I don’t quite take well to are the young ones - those who have not lost the sparkle in their eyes. Perhaps I miss that version of myself, if only for the nostalgia of it. In maybe the first time to my recollection, this is the version of myself I have liked most. Clearly, there is still so much to work on, but to date, this is the me with the most things I like.

dkjslds

May mga bagay na alam kong hindi pa pwedeng sabihin.

Tulad ng:

(1) Pa alaga naman.

(2) Konting pahinga lang, napapagod rin ako.

(3) Malayo mararating ng kaunting tahimik.

Sige na, tagalan mo pa. Isang oras pa.