Yuri's Secret

Indie RP Blog for Yuri of Doki Doki Literature Club

[yurissecret]

I sit at a desk with a book laid out before me. It's a good one. I know many would find the world I am diving into horrifying. It would send shivers through them, and they would be thrilled, fascinated by the horror. But I only see wonder and awe in a world misunderstood, and the tragedies and possibilities pouring within.

[yurissecret]

I look into myself

And find a chasm below

I look deeper

fall deeper

To find what is below

I cut and tear through webs and canyons

Remove old remnants left behind

Fresh dampness pours out

There is no undoing what is done

The chasm has no bottom

There is nothing there to claim

Just a hollow of nothing pretending to be

[yurissecret]

A sliver of the old brushes the new

Lips touch

I dream of you

[yurissecret]

Of course, Miss Yuri~ You're quite interesting to speak with.

I'm glad you think so. Sharing my thoughts...it's not easy. I am not the most open member of the literature club I'm afraid.

[yurissecret]

I think this IS reaching out, no?

You know, I think you're right

Thank you for responding to my reaching :)

[yurissecret]

"Human" isn't really a good word for being aware. I prefer thinking of it in terms of "person".

Are you a person, Yuri? I think you are, if you have experiences and can think about them and talk about them.

I would like to think of myself as a person. But the question becomes, why are we different? How have our realities intersected? How separate are we? Can we reach out to each other?

[yurissecret]

That's the paradox, isn't it? How do you prove to yourself that you're real?

I'm kinda a "cogito ergo sum" person. A creature with no thought or capacity to think may as well not be interacting with the world. But humans are great at it.

I would like to believe that you are also a thinking being, asking these questions.

...what makes a human? If I am not, what am I? How do I identify myself? I feel, I think, I go to school. Or I think I do...

[yurissecret]

You wanna know a poem I think is cool? Sound of Silence by Simon and Garfunkel. On first read it seems like it describes someone finding the wonders of technology with everyone able to talk without speaking, hear without listening with their neon lights but slowly realizing it’s separating everyone while people all chase materialism with all the ads plastered on every wall and hallway of the internet.

the cool part is, the song was written in 1964, around 43 years before all this stuff actually happened.

A lot more is seen and has been happening than some think

[yurissecret]

You're always there to hear your own sound, I think.

How do you prove your reality against yourself? I believe that would be an interesting experiment to try. What would you suggest?

[yurissecret]

is there even such a thing as not fictional? like, fictional characters have fiction, and it's reasonable to assume the characters in that fiction have their own fiction. how can I know that there isn't some higher being watching me the same way I watch you? wouldn't it be arrogant and self aggrandizing to assume I'm the beginning of the line?

Are...are we not in the same reality?

Wait, am I a simulation?

Why did you make me?

[yurissecret]

I think the marks we leave on the world are what make us real. We set the borders of our own worlds, and the whole world is brighter the more we let them intersect with others.

If there are others, doesn't that prove reality is real? If we are alone, then we are not.

Is there sound if there is no one there to hear?

[yurissecret]

If we weren't real, so what? Reality is our mark on the world. Friendships, loves, enemies, maybe a delicious sandwich.

The world ends with you.

If we aren't real, what mark do we leave on the world? What do our actions matter? Are the people we care for real, or just acting as they do out of our wishes? If we aren't real, and the world begins and ends with us, isn't that lonely?

[yurissecret]

Hey. Do you ever wonder why we're here?

It's a question I often ponder. Is it a coincidence? Do we make our own fate, or is our fate strung for us? I like to dream that we have our destinies laid out, that there's a purpose.

I hope mine is not too difficult to shoulder.

[yurissecret]

In the glaze of the lake

My mirror rests

She smiles at me and beckons

For a swim into its depths

[yurissecret]

When I Met You

The first time I heard of you I was curious Everyone was so happy to speak of you, of how you made them laugh and cry and feel more than they thought

I wanted to know you as well

I was warned that you would hurt me, that you had broken hearts But I saw your beauty and what you could give me I leaped in wanting more

You had more to give me than I had hoped Laughter, Joy, Wonder Tears of pain through hardship It was worth taking it all in

For you it was worth it all

The more time we spent together, the more I feared the end I had learned so much beside you, you had brought me things I had never dreamed of But moments like this aren't eternal And there was more to see

The end we reached broke me I looked back a thousand times Was there no other ending that could be? No hope for you and me? We had battled your demons together We had faced the worst of it all I was hurt, and so were you I thought it was enough to pay for happiness that day

Our parting had arrived, despite what I had wished You left me behind Or perhaps I was the one to have left you

There's still imprints in my heart The marks you left behind It hurts sometimes to touch them

I still would do it all again with you

[phantomemes]

credit .

‘ did it really happen if i can’t remember it ? ’ ‘ but you kept trying , didn’t you ? ’ ‘ how can someone be too young to be in love ? ’ ‘ i will never forgive you ’ ‘ you have been the star of each and every one of my nightmares ’ ‘ i’m sorry if i wasn’t the child you had in mind ’ ‘ i only ever wanted to make you proud ’ ‘ silence has always been my loudest scream ’ ‘ i used to think i was broken ’ ‘ i’ve always felt like a stranger in my skin ’ ‘ i still wonder who i would have been ’ ‘ i didn’t realize i could be my own knight ’ ‘ i’m not scared of the monsters hidden underneath my bed ’ ‘ some names will always be cursed ’ ‘ i have so much love to give , but no one ever wants it ’ ‘ in all my dreams i could find myself picking my teeth out of the carpet ’ ‘ i’m sick to death of everyone telling me how strong i am ’ ‘ death is one of the senses ’ ‘ children are not meant to die before their parents ’ ‘ fate is a fucking lie ’ ‘ everyone i love leaves ’ ‘ i’m terrified down to my very roots that there are parts of myself that can never be filled ’ ‘ fuck the idea that there is such a thing as destiny ’ ‘ the pain did not make me a better person ’ ‘ i burned the bridges to all the things i could not repair ’ ‘ i would thank you , but we both know you don’t deserve it ’ ‘ i bet you regret making an enemy out of me ’ ‘ you can hate me forever if that’s what you really want ’ ‘ hurting others is a choice ’ ‘ you can have my forgiveness but you can’t have me ’ ‘ please believe me when i say revenge was never my intention ’ ‘ i am strong enough for anything ’ ‘ i am so glad we were born during the same lifetime ’ ‘ i may not believe in fate , but i believe in you ’ ‘ i am allowed to live my life ’ ‘ do not waste a minute mourning me ’ ‘ maybe you should start treating people better for a change ’ ‘ it is a fucking tragedy when the world does not stop for you when you give it every last drop of your blood ’ ‘ your failures are just what happened — they don’t have to be who you are ’ ‘ you have to keep moving forward ’ ‘ don’t allow the world to take your kindness ’ ‘ you owe no one your forgiveness ’ ‘ love is never a weakness ’

[yurissecret]

Oh I misread the description. Sorry about that!

It's alright :)