Zey's Void

and maybe my thoughts don't need to stay in my head, but instead can be sent into this void.

[zeysvoid-blog]

is love really fluttering

i never had an actual boyfriend, not one with a label on it. and sure, i flirted with guys a lot, and even kissed a few of them. it was just in the moment, you know? but truth is, i never felt that tingly sensation, fireworks in my head, nor butterflies in my stomach when i touch a guy. it makes me wonder if love is really fluttering like they say or maybe i’ve just never found love with the people i’ve been with. when i feel that sensation, does it mean love? i wonder when i’d feel that.

[zeysvoid-blog]

i’d like to raise a puppy again

i had a dog since i was young, but knew i never had the maturity to raise one. unlike others, we’re not the best of friends. unlike my siblings, i don’t cuddle with her. unlike every other dog owner, our relationship seems complicated. and now i’m having thoughts if i’d like to raise a puppy again. maybe then i’ll feel the bond a dog parent and a dog has. but my dog, i wonder how she’d feel?

[zeysvoid-blog]

what exactly is a dream

me and a couple of friends were talking yesterday. i told them i don’t mind dying right at that moment. it wasn’t a pessimistic talk nor suicidal thoughts. we just thought that this life is so hard that we don’t mind stopping it. i told her i wasn’t the kind of person who would regret not fulfilling her dreams. why? i had no particular dream. i don’t know where i’ll go. i have no idea what i want to chase. i have no dreams i want to bring into reality. maybe that’s what i need. but what exactly is a dream anyways?

[zeysvoid-blog]

i have no more will

i’m a college freshman on my second semester. i am gradually losing my will to study, because i feel like i’ve already failed. should i continue and keep going? fight for the dream? is this even still my dream? should i back out while it’s still early? maybe all freshmen get this mindset once in a while. even in my worries, i am not special nor unique. i have no more will to think, for now, i just push on ahead. because i have no other options and no more will to resist.

[zeysvoid-blog]

i hope my daughter receives flowers.

i hope my daughter receives flowers. i want her to grow up strong and loved, to know that independence looks good on her. that no man will define her worth. but i still wish she receives flowers. to know that someone appreciates her and she is as beautiful and graceful as floras.