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h
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@zieglertobus
Please reblog if you play a character who is 30 years of age or older
I don’t care if it’s an OC or a canon character, and while I play a human, I don’t care if your fandom isn’t but for the love of god, why is everyone in their twenties? Give me some mid thirties or even some fourties. Hell, throw me some silver foxes. Please.
@lemonslymans
my reaction to laying down for a while and then seeing @adirtyphonecall when I open tumblr.
Idk who’s running your blog, @adirtyphonecall, but I saw the icon and went “.....waitaminit...that’s.....Joanne from company....is that....[clicks]...[GASPS] IT IS!!!!”
lemonslymans:
“Shane Walsh, the Senator from Oklahoma, asked me how my wife was today. I’ve known him since three days after he was sworn in four years ago. He said he thought I had been married to a ‘nice woman’ for awhile now.” Josh looked over at Toby. “Said, and I quote, ‘how’s that nice wife of yours? You’ve been married for a few years now, right?’ I think he was remembering when I dated Amy?”
All that earned Josh was an eyebrow raise, really. It wasn’t like they’d been shouting from the rooftops that they’d gone off, secretly, to Massachusetts and gotten a marriage certificate over Thanksgiving break. The senior staff knew, HR knew, but that was about it. “Well, if anyone’s the wife in this relationship, J-bean, it’s you.” Toby rolled onto his side and faced the other man, “I’m only insulted because he thought you were dumb enough to have married Amy, not because he thought you were married to a woman.”
❝ I’m heterosexual. ❞ /lemonslyman
@lemonslymans
“So am I,” Toby deadpanned, “Yet here we are, both naked. In bed. Together.” The pregnant pause was more than a little dramatic, but that was the point, as he waved his left hand in front of Josh’s face, “And we’ve been married for a year.”
@zieglertobus (cont)
That was Toby’s way with words. She couldn’t deny it, though: it was a pretty accurate comparison. People rushed for cake like savage animals.
“Well I’ll definitely keep that in mind.” And she would. She was already making a mental note. If ever in need of something for like his birthday or whenever she might need to see him a little less grumpy than usual, pie over cake. She guessed pecan. Maybe apple.
“You sure you don’t want any, though? Since that’s what’s available. If you don’t grab some soon I’m pretty sure it’ll be completely snatched up.”
There was something about cake, especially here in the White House, that made people go absolutely ape shit. Maybe it was the stress of the job, or maybe it was the not-so-secret secret that the White House was run by a bunch of overgrown children. People were starting to catch on, out in the real world, that politics wasn’t all it was cracked up to be, all serious and adult.
He smiled, putting the ball down and pulling out the file he was supposed to be looking at, “I’m sure. I think if I get any more sugar in my system, this speech will sound like the President’s the head of his high school debate club, not the head of the United States of America. Besides, it’s not even cake from the good bakery in town, it’s from Rodman’s. I know we don’t make all that much here, but ---Rodman’s?” Toby snorted, “Thanks for the offer though,” rubbing a hand over his bald head, he gestured to his couch, “You need a place to eat that? Hiding from Josh?” he knew the drill.
❝ When did you first realize? ❞
Toby gave him a half-hearted chuckle. “You’d think it was something I knew, like I looked at him one day and understood it?” His head shook as he leaned forward, holding the coffee between his hands as he let the warmth keep his hands from freezing, “It never happened like that, I wanted to smash his head into the wall more often than not, and one day? I did...except I smashed him into the wall and then I smashed my face into his.” It had been years ago at this point, Josh just wouldn’t shut up, and everything was going to shit around them, no solutions were presenting themselves.
“Something just snapped, I guess. It kind of sneaks up on you, especially if you spent your whole life hearing ‘yadda yadda marriage is man and woman’ and all that jazz.”
❝ People are shameless when it comes to cake. It’s a beautiful thing to see. ❞ - meaningfulxwords from Donna
@meaningfulxwords
Toby just looked up at her from his desk, fiddling with one of his Spaulding balls. “Cake? Ehh, they’re animals, like lions fighting over the last meaty bit of a felled gazelle on the plains of the Serengeti. I’ll take pie over cake any day.” As was obvious, because he was still sitting here, with no cake, when the rest of the communications bullpen was empty, having gone ballistic after having heard the C word.
love, simon → sentence starters
slightly edited in some cases to work for rp purposes. features quotes from Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda as well. feel free to change phrasing or pronouns to fit your muse(s)!
❝ I’m just like you. ❞
❝ I have one huge-ass secret. ❞
❝ Nobody knows I’m gay. ❞
❝ Sometimes I feel like I’m stuck on a ferris wheel. One minute I’m on top of the world, then the next I’m at rock-bottom. ❞
❝ I’ve been thinking about why I haven’t come out yet. ❞
❝ Who you are to the world is pretty terrifying because what if the world doesn’t like you?❞
❝ It doesn’t seem fair that only gay people have to come out. Why is straight the default?❞
❝ Sometimes I feel like I’m always on the outside, there’s this invisible line that I have to cross to really be a part of everything and I just can’t ever cross it. ❞
❝ Sometimes I think I’m destined to care so much about one person it nearly kills me. ❞
❝ He’s wearing a woman’s sweater and he’s drunk. ❞
❝ When did you first realize? ❞
❝ I haven’t told anyone. Announcing who you are to the world is pretty terrifying. ❞
❝ I have something to tell you. I’m straight. ❞
❝ I like girls. ❞
❝ I’m heterosexual. ❞
❝ I’m sorry. I can’t do this anymore. ❞
❝ I’m supposed to be the one that decides when and how and who knows, and how I get to say it, that’s supposed to be my thing! ❞
❝ I’m done living in a world where I don’t get to be who I am. I deserve a great love story and I want someone to share it with. ❞
❝ Have you ever been in love? ❞
❝ These last years, it’s almost like I can feel you holding your breath. ❞
❝ Disclaimer, this is about to get romantic as F. ❞
❝ She’s cute, but she’s just not really my type. Not because she’s black. I love black women. Not like, you know, I have a thing for black women, I just, I just, I just love all women. ❞
❝ I might not know your name or what you look like, but I want to find you.❞
❝ I’m done living in a world where I don’t get to be who I am. ❞
❝ White shouldn’t be the default any more than straight should be the default. There shouldn’t even be a default. ❞
❝ Sometimes it seems like everyone knows who I am except me ❞
❝ Straight people really should have to come out, and the more awkward it is, the better. Awkwardness should be a requirement. ❞
❝ I mean, I feel secure in my masculinity, too. Being secure in you masculinity isn’t the same as being straight. ❞
❝ I’m just so sick of straight people who can’t get their shit together. ❞
❝ I’m too busy trying not to be in love with someone who isn’t real. ❞
❝ Really, though, there are only two kinds of weather: hoodie weather and weather where you wear a hoodie anyway. ❞
❝ Did you just tell us you’re gay? ❞
❝ Nothing is worse than the secret humiliation of being insulted by proxy. ❞
❝ I fall a little bit in love with everyone. ❞
❝ People are shameless when it comes to cake. It’s a beautiful thing to see. ❞
❝ There’s something about you that makes me want to open up, and that’s slightly terrifying to me. ❞
❝ I knew you had a secret. ❞
❝ I wanted to ask you about it, but I didn’t wan to pry. Maybe I made a mistake. ❞
❝ You get to be more you than you have been in, in a very long time. You deserve everything you want. ❞
❝ I like no endings. I like things that don’t end. ❞
❝ You may actually be the only person who gets more than 140 characters from me. That’s kind of awesome, right? ❞
❝ I have a sneaking suspicion that you’re not 100% committed to your Oreo diet. ❞
❝ I can’t imagine a scenario where I don’t want to kiss your face off as soon as I see you.❞
❝ I feel irrelevant. ❞
❝ They put me in a box, and every time I try to nudge the lid open, they slam it back down. It’s like nothing about me is allowed to change. ❞
❝ It’s really amazing, isn’t it? Someone can trigger your sexual identity crisis and not have a clue they’re doing it. ❞
❝ There’s no such thing as a good idea when you’re in seventh grade. ❞
❝ I feel like I’m supposed to make some comment to underscore the ridiculousness of it all, but honestly? It’s sort of nice not to have to be cynical for a change. ❞
❝ I try not to change, but i keep changing, in all these tiny ways. And every freaking time, i have to reintroduce myself to the universe all over again. ❞
❝ You make everything a big deal. ❞
@maternalmelancholy // [here]
He had--unfortunately--not been around as often as he’d wanted when his own kids were growing up. Toby still blamed Andy for not wanting to re-marry, but if he was honest with himself, it was the fact that he had been White House Communications Director, a job that had never afforded him much time to see anyone outside of the senior staff. That didn’t mean he didn’t know how to hold a baby, but it did, apparently, mean he didn’t know how to hold this baby.
So he lets Delores gently move him until the baby’s more comfortable and she slowly stops fussing, even looks up at him and coos a little, which gets Toby to smile and let out a small chuckle of his own. “Babies tend to do that. My son used to scoot around upside down on his butt and his head before he figured out how to crawl, everyone’s got their weird things.”
❝ I never knew relationships were supposed to make you feel better about yourself. ❞ /lemonslymans
@lemonslymansToby stared at him for a moment, jaw slightly open, as he chewed over the words he wanted to say, how best to put them. “Josh, you’re an idiot,” perfect, great start, “that’s just about all relationships are supposed to make you do. Sure, people get in fights now and then, everyone does, but if you’re fighting more than you’re not? You shouldn’t be in that relationship.” He sighed, reaching out to pat him on the shoulder–they were at work, the fact that they even had this private a moment was a miracle–though he wished he could hug him, kiss him. “But you’re my idiot, and I love you, I’m glad you feel better about yourself, now go figure out how we’re going to get three more Republicans on our side by Friday.”
IF YOU ARE OKAY WITH ICONLESS ROLEPLAYS REBLOG THIS SO YOUR FOLLOWERS KNOW !!
like as much as i love icons and a good psd, sometimes its just tasking to do. and not everyone has great resources. so if you’re okay with having threads with no icons, please reblog this so that people know you’re okay with it. i feel like roleplayers today are too focused on the aesthetics and won’t follow people who use base icons or even none at all. it’s not about icons, but about the writing !!
mornington-the-crescent:
In the Jewish calendar, it is 5779. In the Chinese calendar, it is 4716.
This means that the Jews had to wait over a thousand years before they could have Chinese food on Christmas.
Merry Christmas, everyone.
❝ I was hoping that by now I would look older. ❞
Toby looked over at her and gave her a bit of a chuckle, “You know, I think that’s the first time I’ve ever heard a woman say that. Most times? I hear the opposite.” A bit of color rose in his cheeks, “You look wonderful, by the way, regardless.”
John Mulaney Sentence Starters
NEW IN TOWN
❝ I was hoping that by now I would look older. ❞
❝ I never thought about how to handle real problems in adult life. ❞
❝ Looks like regular sand, but then you’re gonna start to sink into it. ❞
❝ That’s pure mom. ❞
❝ Luckily, I had a good alibi. ❞
❝ It’s a grid system, mother fucker. ❞
❝ Of the racial slurs, that has got to be the laziest. ❞
❝ Before I went through puberty I had the voice of a little flute. ❞
❝ No one knows what you’re talking about you idiot. ❞
❝ You will treat me with respect! ❞
❝ I am a tiger mom. ❞
❝ First off, no. ❞
❝ Midgets were never enslaved! Unless you count the Wonka Factory. ❞
❝ You’re gonna have to get used to that. ❞
❝ Yeah, you got it, man. ❞
❝ It was really easy to get away with murder before they knew about DNA. ❞
❝ Oh, good, it has a mind of its own. ❞
❝ It’s really easy not to go to things. ❞
❝ That you would do anything is totally remarkable. ❞
❝ The less amount of time you live the better. ❞
❝ I was definitely gay when I was a little boy. ❞
❝ I have girlfriend and she’s a female person. ❞
❝ Go, fetch! ❞
❝ Life is a fucking nightmare. ❞
❝ I’ll keep all my emotions right here, and one day I’ll die. ❞
❝ What the fuck am I supposed to do with that? ❞
❝ Let’s go over there and destroy the place. ❞
❝ Fuck da police! ❞
❝ I’ve never climbed a fence that high before. ❞
❝ Did I do that? ❞
❝ Hey, come here. I want to show you something. ❞
❝ Why do you do this? ❞
❝ I’m not gonna kill that guy. ❞
❝ Hey can you help me out? I’m very gay. I’d like a few dollars. ❞
❝ Yeah, that’s the type of lowbrow shit i’m looking for. ❞
❝ It was a lie. To get drugs. ❞
THE COMEBACK KID
❝ I know how big letters should be. ❞
❝ You totally forgot the lesson you just learned. ❞
❝ Do not fuck with me. ❞
❝ Marriage is gonna be very magical. ❞
❝ I bet he did kill his wife. ❞
❝ I never knew relationships were supposed to make you feel better about yourself. ❞
❝ Anyone who’s seen my dick and met my parents needs to die. ❞
❝ Why would you marry a woman if she’s already having sex with you? ❞
❝ If you just bought the cow nobody would say that anymore! ❞
❝ It’s just a little bit wrong, isn’t it? ❞
❝ What a mighty king I will be. ❞
❝ It’s haunted, but it has a lovely kitchen backsplash. ❞
❝ You don’t deserve a beach house. ❞
❝ This is an on-fire garbage can. ❞
❝ I don’t care for that shit at all. ❞
❝ You’re never too young to learn our national no-snitching policy. ❞
❝ No one wants to applaud the penis of a thirty-two-year-old weirdo. ❞
❝ You know how I’m filled with rage? ❞
❝ So you can imagine the kind of stress that I am under. ❞
❝ This is the best movie idea I’ve ever heard in my life. ❞
❝ Kids have it very good now. ❞
❝ Doesn’t anyone wanna know why his dick was near my biters in the first place? ❞
❝ How did he lose his arm? ❞
❝ That’s exactly what you won’t ask. ❞
❝ You have your law practice, and me, I have all these fucking markers. ❞
❝ I’m just reading this Yellow Pages. ❞
❝ My dad loved us! He just didn’t care about our general happiness or self-esteem. ❞
❝ McDonald’s! McDonald’s! McDonald’s! McDonald’s! ❞
❝ That is the funniest thing I have ever seen in my entire life. ❞
❝ How perfect is that? ❞
❝ We’d rather you do it in the house than go somewhere else. ❞
❝ Ah…numbers. The letters of math. ❞
❝ One feels like a duck splashing around in all this wet! ❞
❝ Don’t you see? I’m a duck now. ❞
❝ If you eat enough ass and suck enough dick, one day you can sell drugs. ❞
❝ Hey, man. I like your button. ❞
MODERN VERSE:
This is CANON DIVERGENT from the West Wing Seasons 6 and 7. After President Bartlet’s two terms in the White House, Toby Ziegler’s done as Communications Director, and goes back to New York, where he decides to take a teaching position at Columbia University in the Political Science department. Most of the classes are Poli-Sci, though he does teach a couple units on speech-writing. His class is hard to get into, since everyone wants to take a class from the man who was the President’s voice for 8 years. He lives alone(ship dependent), and consults from time to time on political matters, bills and the like, but he no longer works for campaigns or parties. He’s getting older, and the stress of the White House was enough, Columbia’s plenty for him.
