SENTENCE MEME ⟶ DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES / 8.1
always feel free to tweak the sentence to fit your muse.
‘there’s no task more unpleasant than getting rid of an unwanted guest.’
‘is this happening? are we really doing this?’
‘everyone stay focused. the hardest part is over.’
‘how is it going to be okay? someone is calling the dead guy.’
‘he has a home… with people who care about him, people who are doing to come looking for him, leading them straight to us.’
‘we could still go to the police.’
‘he broke into your house. he threatened you. we could explain that.’
‘we are going to get caught. people always get caught.’
‘we can’t do this. we’re not criminals. we drive carpool.’
‘got up early, so i figured, what the heck?’
‘i didn’t sleep last night. but you would know that. you were there.’
‘do not drink this. it’s been in my car for three days.’
‘are you sure this is about the kids?’
‘don’t take this the wrong way, but you could do this professionally.’
‘coming from a man who’s on a first-name basis with half the hookers in this down, that’s quite a compliment.’
‘your friends don’t like me.’
‘i’m a cop. i got an eye for human behaviour.’
‘i know what’s going on. you’re trying to distract me with sex, and if that’s the case… bring it on.’
‘wake up! i made you waffles.’
‘come back when you learn how to make mimosas.’
‘why have you been so short-tempered lately?’
‘look, i get it, okay? but we have to move on with our lives.’
‘no matter what i do, it’s this horrible thing that is always there.’
‘a priest can’t share what you say in confession.’
‘are you sure he’s not just gonna make you feel guiltier?’
‘i need to get this off my conscience. it’s tearing me apart.’
‘i was looking out the window, and i noticed dust in the corner of each windowpane. it’s been driving me nuts.’
‘well, there’s a lot of weird stuff you like to do in the bedroom, but cleaning… not so much.’
‘you don’t sleep. you don’t eat. you never leave the house.’
‘definitely rich. check out the car.’
‘definitely single. check out the fish.’
‘and let me just say, i can tell you one thing that isn’t wonky.’
‘oh, come on. i’m married, i’m not dead.’
‘i can still imagine all the dirty things i’d do to him.’
‘i’m telling you, that is one loose cannon.’
‘he’s that good in the sack?’
‘i poked her with my pencil a couple times. she is d-e-a dead.’
‘i’m sorry. it’s just you’re, like, a thousand years older than me.’
‘man, the things i’ve heard. there was a lady yesterday who… no, no, no, i can’t say it.’
‘i’m so bummed i can’t tweet anymore.’
‘i made out with two chicks once in college.’
‘i don’t know if you’ve ever buried anything before, but you have to dig a hole.’
‘i wasn’t even supposed to be here today. once again, in the wrong place at the wrong time.’
‘does that mean she deserved to die?’
‘now let’s all slap on a happy face and pretend like this never happened.’
‘i’m really not feeling like drinking right now.’
‘first, you stop talking to your friends. now you’re wigging out at a rat funeral. you’re making me nervous.’
‘well, i’m sorry i’m not handling accessory to murder as well as the rest of you.’
‘i know you’re having a hard time, but please hold it together.’
‘terrific. i found a dead body.’
‘drop it off in a bad part of town, and let social decay… take its course.’
‘it was easier when i was drunk.’
‘what should i do? should i gun it?’
‘she could’ve been married, but, no, she’s a lesbian.’
‘i chew tobacco. and i’m a woman.’
‘when you start something, young man, you see it through.’
‘look, i’m single. you’re single. i’m hot. you’re hot. assuming you’re not gay, and those shoes tell me you’re not, we could do that thing where we flirt for a few weeks.’
‘when i said “coffee”, you did know i meant sex, right?’
‘you should write a book. otherwise, when you die, your secrets will die with you.’
‘for instance, if we were talking about a crime… then confessing to the authorities would prove the intentions of our heart.’
‘you can’t ask to be absolved for a sin that you intend to keep hidden.’
‘there is no absolution for this thing. i just have to live with it.’
‘every noise i’d hear at night, it was him. every dark alley i passed, he was waiting for me. when i’d lie in bed, i was afraid he’d come find me. he was in my dreams… and in my nightmares. and that’s what i had to live with.’
‘if you wanna get back together… i’m open to that.’
‘this is such a scary time, and i really need you.’
‘you know what you do when you’re scared? you buy a night-light. you don’t go have sex with the guy you are supposed to be separated from!’
‘you know what’s gonna affect my marriage? when my husband goes to prison.’
‘you elected yourself chairman of the dead guy committee and started making decisions for everyone. like you always do.’
‘ow! i told you we couldn’t trust her!’
‘we are never gonna be able to tell anybody about this, are we?’
‘it’s good to have friends who help clean up our messes.’
