[zephestia]

dine 'n dash [kai smith (ninjago) x fem!reader] ঌ

all you wanted was a peaceful saturday to recover from a hellish week. instead, you get kai smith—an egoistic ninja who hijacks your brunch, destroys your dad’s prized car, and drags you headfirst into a deadly mission. your weekend is officially ruined, and kai is officially your least favorite ninja (and person).

tags: one-shot (7.061 words). fluff. crack. "enemies" to lovers(?) but they're not really enemies at all and it's only a one-sided beef.

warmth graced your skin as the sun streamed through the window of the station diner. you sighed, popping a salty fry into your mouth and savoring the rare quiet of the restaurant.

this week had been a hellish one. ever since you got your license, your dad hadn't given you a moment of peace. every day after school, he left you with a list of errands that required you to drive all over town.

at first, the excitement of finally being behind the wheel subdued the exhaustion. but it had been a month now, and the fun you felt in the first few days of owning a driving license had vanished, leaving you with nothing but extreme fatigue.

you thought—after a hellish week of juggling between school projects, exams, and dad's errands—you would finally have the weekend to yourself. a weekend of sleeping in, breakfast in bed, and binge watching shows. 

unfortunately, dad had other plans. literally. 

instead of sleeping in, dad had woken you up at 7 am to drive him to the airport for an “emergency business trip”. you hadn’t even had a second to shower, let alone eat. that’s how you ended up having brunch at this cramped, little station diner.

although the low rumblings of engines and the occasional roar of cars echoed from the pumps outside, it was still quiet in here. the air conditioner provided sanctuary, humming steadily and keeping you cool from the scorching sun outside. and, with dad being away, you realized you would at least have the rest of the saturday to yourself. 

you sigh, contentedly this time. finally, a moment of peace.

‘ding!’

the bell above the door rang. you didn’t look up, too busy enjoying the cold condensation on your water glass, but you felt the atmosphere in the diner shift. the quiet was replaced by the heavy, rhythmic thud of boots moving with a swagger that felt entirely too high-energy for a saturday morning. the footsteps stopped right at your booth.

shadowing your sunlight, a figure slid into the seat directly across from you. you froze, a salty fry halfway to your lips, and slowly looked up.

sitting there was a guy who looked like he had walked straight out of a high-budget action movie. his hair was styled into gravity-defying, dark spikes, and his red leather jacket looked far too expensive to be sitting in a greasy station diner. he did not ask if the seat was taken—he just leaned back, spreading his arms across the top of the booth as if he were claiming the entire restaurant as his territory. he flashed a smirk—the kind of look from someone who was very used to being the center of attention.

damn it. your moment of peace lasted around less than 60 seconds.

“you look like you’re having a pretty boring morning,” he said. his voice was smooth, dripping with an unearned level of confidence. “mind if i join you, gorgeous?”

you lowered your hand, staring at him with a deadpan expression. “i had a pretty eventful morning, actually. hoping to find some peace and quiet now.”

“care to tell?” he asked, eyebrows quirked, leaning an arm on the table.

“care to introduce yourself first?” you shot back.

“the name’s kai,” he winked. “i’m sure you recognize the face. it’s a lot of pressure being the guy everyone counts on, but when you’ve got this much natural talent… well you get used to the spotlight.”

you blinked, a muscle in your jaw twitching. you were exhausted, unwashed, and currently being held hostage by a stranger’s self-introductory monologue. 

“the spotlight?” you repeated, voice dry.

“the ninjas? saving ninjago? ring a bell?” he chuckled, leaning forward as if he were letting you in on a secret. “you know, i’m basically the muscle of the operation. the heart, too. it’s a high-stakes life, but someone’s gotta do the heavy lifting.”

you stared at him, unimpressed. “a ninja. right. how humble of you.”

ugh, ick.

he continued to ramble, his hands moving animatedly as he described a “near-impossible” save he’d made last week involving something evil and the end of the world. you tuned out somewhere between his mention of “perfect hair maintenance during combat” and the sheer physics of how his gel held up under pressure.

you leaned your cheek against your palm, watching his lips move. he was undeniably attractive, but his ego was an actual physical presence at the table, taking up more space than the both of you combined.

“and that,” he said, leaning back with a self-satisfied grin, “is why they call me the master of fire. it’s not just the power, it’s the… well, you see it.” he gestured vaguely to his entire existence.

“i see something, alright,” you muttered, reaching for another fry.

before he could ask for a clarification, a sharp, feminine voice pierced through the diner’s hum. “kai! seriously? we’re on a schedule!”

a girl stood by the glass door, her arms crossed with a look of pure, unadulterated exasperation on her face. she was dressed in practical gear, bob haired with bangs, and she was currently staging at kai like he was a recurring headache.

you looked at her, then back at kai, your eyebrows shooting up in disbelief. the hell? this guy had been sitting here pitching his life story to a stranger while he had a girl waiting by the door? the audacity was almost impressive.

“sorry to cut this short, pretty girl,” kai sighs, a flicker of annoyance on his face as he kept that confident smirk of his, “but duty calls.”

he then slid out of the booth and stood up, adjusting his red leather jacket with a sharp, confident tug. 

“keep an eye out for the red blur on the highway,” he leaned down slightly, giving you one last wink that he clearly thought was devastating. "i don't do slow.”

kai swaggered out the door, grabbing a take out bag from the counter without looking back. a moment later, the ground beneath your booth began to vibrate. a roar—much louder and more obnoxious than any truck engine—tore through the air. through the window, you watched a bright, polished red sports car peel out of the parking lot, the tires screaming against the asphalt as it vanished onto the main road.

you sat there in the sudden, ringing silence, looking at your half-eaten plate.

“damn, his ego is almost as big as his head…” you muttered, shaking your head and took a big bite of the rest of your food.

the red ninja did not leave a good impression on you, even if he probably tried to. whatever. at least now, you thought, you’d finally have that calm saturday you had been dreaming of.

— ঌ —

the drive home was supposed to be the easiest part of your day. the highway was relatively clear, the radio was humming something low, and for a moment, you actually felt your muscles relax. 

you pulled up to a deserted intersection, the light turning a stubborn, glowing red. your fingers tapped against the steering wheel as you glanced at the clock.

almost home. almost in bed.

suddenly, the silence was shattered. a massive black vehicle roared past, blowing straight through the red light with a mechanical scream. before you could even yell an insult, a figure plummeted from the sky, tumbling across the asphalt like a ragdoll before skidding to a halt just a few feet from your bumper.

your heart hammered against your ribs. “oh my gosh!”

you were about to jump out to help when the figure scrambled to his feet with unnatural speed. he was covered in dirt, his red suit torn in places, and his mask was pulled up just enough to reveal those same gravity-defying spikes you’ve seen earlier today.

it was him. again.

kai, the red ninja, sprinted toward your car. his eyes wide and frantic as he began pounding on your driver’s side window.

“hey! hey, open up! let me borrow your car!” he shouted, his voice muffled by the glass.

you rolled the window down just an inch, staring at him in disbelief. “are you serious? you again? why would i give you my car?”

“oh, hey, gas station girl! perfect,” kai beamed. “please, please. i’m on a saving the world kinda mission now and i need a car,” he continued, glancing over his shoulder at the horizon where a trail of dark smoke was rising.

“fine,” you huffed, unlocking the door for him, “but what type of evil is it this time?”

“no time to explain, move!” he yelled.

“alright, damn.”

you didn’t even have time to process the stupidity of the situation before you were scrambling over the center console and into the passenger seat. as you moved, kai dived into the driver’s seat and slammed the door shut, his hands gripping your dad’s pristine leather steering wheel with a grip that looked far too tight.

“thanks. now, buckle up.” he grunted.

not even a second after the seatbelt clicked, his foot hit the gas. hard. the car didn’t just move, it launched. your head snapped back onto the headrest as the tires screamed in protest, leaving two thick streaks of burnt rubber on the intersection.

“WHAT THE HELL?! YOU’RE DRIVING WAY OVER THE SPEED LIMIT!” you shrieked, clutching the door handle so hard your knuckles turned white.

kai didn’t flinch once. he yanked the wheel, sending the car drifting around a sharp corner. “that’s why i told you to buckle up!”

“ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!”

“driving the speed limit won’t help us catch the literal evil on the run with a jet powered car!” kai shouted back, his eyes locked on the faint glimmer of metal in the distance. he spared a split second glance at the dashboard. “nice car, by the way. this baby will definitely help us catch up to him sooner.”

you felt a pit of dread form in your stomach. “it’s my dad’s. what happened to your own beloved car, anyways?”

kai’s jaw tightened. “it crashed.”

“WHAT?! you crashed that multi-million dollar machine? then what’s gonna happen to—“

“enough chatting, hold tight!” kai’s expression changed from frantic to focused. “we’re gaining on him!”

“goodness!” you wailed, “why did my stupid ass self even let a stupid freaking stranger drive this stupid damn car!”

you pray as you close your eyes, “if deities exists, please let my dad’s insurance cover ninja-related incidents, amen.”

in the midst of your stress, kai had the audacity to chuckle. “cute,” he muttered.

you finally caught up to the massive, jet-powered vehicle, but the villain driving it was not going down easily. his goons—what even are those things?—started to throw scrap metals and heavy crates off the back, sending them bouncing toward your hood.

“if anything happens to this car, i will kill you!” your threatened, voice cracking.

kai smirked, looking entirely too much like he was enjoying this. “feisty. chill out, will you?”

a large piece of metal then crashed against the side mirror, breaking the mount. you cursed, your life flashed before your eyes as the image of your dad’s angry state appears in your mind.

“that’s it, i’m putting a stop to this!” kai growled. he rolled down his window and thrust his arm outside.

all of a sudden, a gallon of thick, clear liquid splashed across the windshield and the hood, drenching the front of the car. some even splashed onto kai’s arm.

“ugh, what is that?” he pulled his arm in, wiping it off then thrust his arm back outside.

you sniffed the air, and your blood ran cold. “why does it smell like gas?” you mumbled, eyes widened as you looked at the liquid shimmering on the hood. “oh shoot. kai, your fire—!”

“i’m on it!” kai shouted.

“NO—!”

without letting you finish your sentence, he sparkled his elemental fire power to blast the enemy, but a stray ember caught the wind. it danced and landed right in the fuel soaked vents of the hood. 

"...the liquid is fuel!” you screamed.

kai’s expression vanished instantly. “i am not on it.”

in the blinked of an eye, kai’s arm hooked around your waist. he pulled you into his chest, shielding your head as he kicked the door open and dove out of the moving vehicle. you hit the pavement hard, rolling together in a tangle of red leather and limbs.

‘BOOM!’

the shockwave rattled your teeth. you sat up, ears ringing as you coughed through a cloud of black smoke, only to see your dad’s “prized possession” reduced to a flaming skeleton of twisted metal. 

kai sat up next to you, brushing soot off his shoulder. he looked at the wreckage, then back at you. “oops.”

you stared at the fire, unmoving, the image of your dad’s anger, sadness, and disappointment filled face burned into your mind. 

“kill me,” you whispered. “just kill me.”

— ঌ —

the crackle of the fire was the only sound in the vast, empty stretch of road. you sat in the dirt, staring at the blackened skeleton of your dad’s sedan. the silence was deafening until you finally found your voice, low and trembling with rage.

“you are officially my least favorite ninja.”

kai, who was busy dusting soot off his red leather sleeves, let out a sharp, annoyed grunt. “i literally just saved your life. a ‘thank you’ would’ve been nice.”

“why would i thank you?” you stood up, pointing a shaky finger at the flaming wreck. “you just destroyed my dad’s favorite car! do you have any idea what he’s going to do to me? i’m dead. i’m a dead person!”

kai straightened up, his eyes flashing with a spark of fire. “well, you could’ve thanked me for saving your life!” he shouted, stepping closer. “in case i haven’t said it loud enough a minute ago! you were about to be a human firework!”

“well, you could’ve leave me to die!” you shrieked back, the panic bubbling over. “at least then i wouldn’t have to face my dad! he’s going to kill me anyway, and it’ll probably be slower and more painful than the explosion!”

kai stared at you, his mouth agape. he looked like he wanted to argue, but the sheer absurdity of your “logic” actually silenced him for a second. 

“and being a human firework sounds way better than being a human punching bag! exploding into fireworks means instant death, less torment! fireworks are also known to be pretty—i would’ve died fast and pretty!” you continued in a frantic rambling, your hands’ motions mirrors it in a frenzied manner.

kai rubbed his temples, letting out a long, frustrated breath. “this is wasting my time,” he muttered, turning his back to you and looking towards the horizon. “i have a bad guy to catch. go home, gas station girl. the walk will help you cool off.”

your jaw dropped. “go home? look around! we’re in the middle of nowhere, the sun is burning hot, and you incinerated my only way back! you still have the audacity to tell me to ‘cool off’ and ‘go home’?!”

“not my problem,” he snapped, though he looked a little guilty for half a second before his ego took back the wheel and started driving him to walk away. “i’ve got ninjago to save. i don’t have time for a civilian melt down.”

“so, you’re gonna abandon a civilian at a deserted, possibly dangerous place, with no way to go back home because her damn phone blew up with the damn stupid car that was a result of a stupid certain someone’s actions!” you fired back. “what kind of ‘ninja’ even does that? what kind of ‘ninja’ are you?”

the rhetorical questions made him halt in his tracks.

“oh, you are not leaving me here,” you growled, marching up to him. if you are going down for the car, you were going to make sure he felt every bit of the consequences. “i’m coming with you. you owe me a car, you owe me a saturday, and you owe me an explanation to my father. i am not letting you out of my sight until i get all three, ninja.”

kai turned around, looking you up and down. he saw the soot on your face, the fire in your eyes, and the fact that you weren’t backing down. he let out a sharp, dry laugh. “you want to come on a high-stakes ninja mission? in those shoes?”

“i will walk into the mouth of a volcano if it means i can haunt you until you fix this!”

kai groaned, reaching for the comms unit on his ear. “fine. whatever. just don’t cry when things gets dangerous.” he tapped the device and talks into the non-visible mic, hidden somewhere in his hood. “kai’s here. yeah, i need a pick up. location sent. and… uh, bring an extra headset. i’ve got a passenger.”

“a passenger? did you find a stray dog, kai?” a static-filled, high pitched voice joked through the comms.

“something like that,” kai muttered, glancing at you. before you could snap at him for the “dog” comment, kai suddenly moved. in one swift motion, he hooked his arms under your knees and back, sweeping you off your feet.

“what are you doing?!” you yelped, your hands flying up to grab his shoulders for balance.

“we’re moving to a better extraction point,” kai said, adjusting his grip. he started walking with that same effortless swagger, despite the fact that he was carrying a full-grown person bridal style.

“put me down! i can walk”

“be quiet and let me do my job,” kai commanded, his voice dropping into that serious, hero mode tone. he looked down at you for a split second, a tiny, annoying smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “besides, you’re slower than i am. and like i said… i don’t do slow.”

you huffed, crossing your arms over your chest as best as you could while being carried. you hated that he was strong, you hated that he was right about the speed, and you especially hated that his hair still looked perfect even after an explosion.

“i still hate you,” you whispered.

“get in line,” he replied.

— ঌ —

“heard someone need a lift?” the same static-filled high pitched voice from before boomed from a set of something that sounds like speakers, not lips. 

instantly, the sky seemed to split open. a violent gush of wind slammed into the desert floor as a blur of electric blue tore through the clouds, descending with a mechanical roar.

the down draft was relentless. it kicked up a whirlwind of sand and grit, whipping your hair into a frenzied, tangled nest that blinded you for a moment. you squeezed your eyes shut, clutching kai’s shoulders just to stay steady in the midst of strong wind.

when the wind finally died down and you managed to blink the dust away, you looked up—and immediately felt  a fresh wave of irritation.

despite the literal mini-hurricane that had just passed over you, kai’s hair hadn't moved a single millimetre. not one spike was out of place. he stood there, perfectly poised and looking like a professional poster boy for “heroism monthly”, while you felt like you’d been dragged through a hedge backward.

the canopy of the seek blue jet hissed open, and a figure clad in blue armor hopped out, landing with a light, acrobatic grace on the cracked asphalt.

“whoa, kai!” the newcomer, dressed in a blue suit similar to kai’s, shouted. his eyes darting from the flaming, skeletal remains of your car to the fact that kai was still holding you in a protective bridal carry. “i thought this was a pickup, not a wedding invitation! did you stop to elope mid-chase, or did you finally kidnap a fan?”

you felt your face heat up—not from the desert sun, but from pure, unadulterated embarrassment. meanwhile, kai just blinked, looking genuinely confused for a split second, and only responded with an unsure, “what?”

the blue ninja gestured wildly at the two of you. “get it? ‘cause you’re carrying her bridal style… so, bride?” his grin was massive, but kai continued to stare at him with a flat, unimpressed expression, the blue ninja’s laugh slowly died down. he cleared his throat, adjusting his hood. “okay, you know what? never mind. the moment’s gone. hop on!”

kai didn’t give you a warning. he simply stepped up to the side of the jet and tossed you into the extra seat. you landed with a disgruntled oomph, scrambling to right yourself as kai jumped in right after you, looking entirely too comfortable.

“wow, such a gentleman,” you grumbled, adjusting your tangled hair with a sharp, sarcastic edge. 

as the canopy hissed shut, sealing out the desert heat, the blue ninja settled into the pilot’s seat. he flipped a series of switches, but his head remained turned toward the back. “so, where are we gonna drop off this bride of yours, kai?”

“go straight to where the others are heading,” kai answered. “we don’t have much time left to drop her off.”

“so, you’re just gonna bring a civilian into a deadly mission? are you out of your mind?” blue ninja responded in bafflement.

“she asked,” kai said simply, crossing his arms.

“i’m emphasizing ‘deadly’,” blue ninja’s voice rose an octave, his hands hovering over the controls. “deadly mission for ninjas makes it a definite big, big danger for a civilian, kai!”

“it’s alright, blue ninja,” you interjected, leaning forward as much as your seatbelt would allow. “i insisted.”

kai shot a look at him. “see?”

“it’s jay,” the blue ninja corrected, though he looked skeptical.

“oh yes, jay,” you continued, voice dripping with the kind of calm that only comes from total life-ruin. “your friend, kai, right here is the one responsible for the death of my dad’s  beloved sedan. he is not a groom. he is a walking insurance claim that i am trying to ensure will not run away.”

“he blew up your car? well, not a surprise,” jay shrugged, “but may i remind you that this is a deadly mission that you’re signing up on, ms…?”

“i am completely okay with that,” you responded with nonchalance. “facing death in a deadly mission is surely far more merciful than whatever my dad’s wrath going to be.”

jay was left speechless, staring at you in complete bewilderment. it took him a moment to shrug it off and move on, putting his attention back on the jet’s controls. “well, that’s one hell of a death wish you got there, ms. bride.”

kai hummed in satisfaction. “told ‘ya!”

“i’m [name], by the way,” you added.

“whatever. i’m sticking with ‘gas station girl’,” kai teased, his usual annoying, sly smirk returning on his face.

“so you just found out about her name now, too, kai?” jay asked.

“well, didn’t feel important enough for me to know,” kai retorted.

ouch. that one stung.

jay shook his head, “don’t listen to him, [name]. it’s a pleasure to meet another person blessed with a sense of humor,” he assured.

“the pleasure’s all mine, thank you,” you replied. “the blue ninja has always been my favorite anyway.”

“hey! you say that when the red ninja is right here in the flesh?!” kai barked, looking offended.

jay didn’t even try to hide his joy. he slammed the throttles forward, and a s the jet roared into the sky, his laughter echoed through the cabin.

“suck it, kai!”

— ঌ —

the jet touched down with a heavy, metallic thud at the edge of a jagged cliffside. outside the cockpit, the landscape was bleak—nothing but a grey stone and a massive, fortress-like structure that hummed with ominous energy, you could see two more figures in the distance: a mountain of a man in black armor and another in stark, clinical white.

the “others” have already arrived.

“alright, we’re here,” kai said, his voice dropping the teasing tone as he unbuckled. he stood up and looked down at you, his expression uncharacteristically stern. “stay in the jet. don’t touch anything, and definitely don’t leave this seat.”

you looked at the high-tech interior, then back at him with a flat stare. “unless this jet is going to blow up, too, i will not listen to you.”

kai paused, his hand halfway to the canopy release. he turned back, leaning into your space. “do you have a death wish?”

“she clearly does,” jay chimed in from the pilot’s seat, busy flipping the shutdown switches. “i mean, have you heard her talk about her dad? the girl is ready for the afterlife.”

kai groaned, realizing he couldn't win an argument against your logic. he looked at jat. “jay, lock the jet. use the master override. i don’t want her wandering into a crossfire.”

“on it!” jay chirped, tapping a glowing blue icon on his screen.

a heavy clunk echoed through the cabin. The doors hissed, and the manual release handles retracted into the wall.

“hey, what?!” you yelled, tugging at the armrest. “you’re actually  locking me in here? this is kidnapping! this is double kidnapping!”

kai ignored your protest, hopping out of the jet as the canopy is slowly sliding down as he rolled out. he landed on the gravel and started checking his gear, his back to you.

jay followed him out, but as he hopped down, he paused and leaned back toward the opening. he shot kai a mischievous, knowing grin. “you’re seriously leaving her alone here, kai?”

kai stopped mid-motion, his hand on his sword hilt. “yeah, why?”

jay’s laugh was bright and annoying against the backdrop of the gloomy fortress. “she’s your ‘bride’, remember? you gotta protect her, can’t let her die! it’s bad luck for the wedding!”

kai’s head snapped toward jay, his face turning a shade of red that matched his suit. “jay, i swear to the first spinjitzu master, if you say that word one more time—”

“have fun, lovebirds!” jay shouted, sprinting off toward the black and white ninjas before kai could blast him with a fireball.

kai stood there for a second, looking like he was debating whether to chase jay or just stay with you. finally, he looked at you through the glass of the cockpit. you were still glaring at him, arms crossed, looking like the world’s angriest passenger princess.

he pointed two fingers at his eyes, then at you—the universal sign for i’m watching you. then, he turned and sprinted toward the fortress.

you watched them go until they were just four colored dots against the grey stone. then, you turned your attention to the glowing blue dashboard.

“lock me in the jet, huh?” you whispered to yourself, eyes narrowing as you spotted the complex layout of buttons. “dad prepared me for much worse situations than this.”

hmpf. they clearly do not know who they’re messing with.

— ঌ —

input. feedback. sequence.

you stared at the glowing blue dashboard, a labyrinth of lights and switches that is nothing but only a thousand-pieces puzzle to you, that just happened to be worth several million dollars. thanks to your dad’s teachings, you didn’t panic.

look for a pattern, you remind yourself.

your fingers danced over the glass until it discovered the master override, that unfortunately, was locked behind a triple-layer encryption. “jay, you’re too predictable,” you chuckled, recalling the way he’d tapped the screen earlier. you traced his ghost-prints on the glass and—click. the manual release handles popped back out with a satisfying hiss.

but before you could push the door open, a shadow fell over the cockpit.

a group of the villain’s goons—mechanical-looking thugs with scrap-metal armor—were swarming the jet. they didn’t realize you were inside until you locked eyes with the leader. he snarled, raising a heavy club to smash the glass.

“oh, no you don’t. this isn’t my car, but i’m not letting another vehicle die today!”

you dove into the pilot’s seat. you didn’t know how to fly, but you knew how to use the defenses. you slammed a sequence of buttons labeled ‘EXT-DEFENSE’. 

outside, the jet’s landing lights flickered to blinding strobe, disorienting the thugs. then, you found the toggle for the ‘electro-shock exterior’. a hum vibrated through the floorboards, and a massive CRACKLE of blue energy surged over the jet’s hull. the enemies were tossed backward, twitching  as the electricity fried their circuits.

again, thank you, dad.

just then, the four colored streaks of the ninjas came sprinting back from the fortress, looking battered and out of breath. they skidded to a halt, eyes wide as they saw the pile of smoking scrap-metal goons surrounding their jet.

“did… did the jet do that on its own?” cole asked, stunned.

“no,” kai breathed, staring at the cockpit where you were calmly dusting off your hands. “she did.”

the canopy hissed open, and you stepped out, looking at kai dead in the eye. “i found the unlock button. and for the record? your security is too basic.”

“hey! now that’s a jab on me,” jay grunted, putting his left arm to the right side of his chest in an attempt to dramatically ‘squeeze’ his ‘heart’.

“actually, jay. your arm’s position is incorrect,” claimed zane. “the heart is located in the thoracic cavity (chest), specifically within the middle section called the mediastinum. it sits behind the breastbone (sternum) and slightly to the left of the body's midline, positioned between the two lungs. it is angled so its base is higher and its apex (tip) points down towards the left side. so, your right arm should be positioned around your left chest, slightly to the middle, for a correct theatrical gesture of ‘squeezing the heart’,” he explained, correcting jay’s gesture.

“w-well, i knew that! i wasn’t trying to squeeze my heart, i was trying to squeeze my liver!” jay countered.

zane nodded. “very well, then.”

cole chuckles and shakes his head as he nudged kai who was still staring at you—the word i’m impressed written all over his face—until a dark, metallic shadow lunged from the rocks above.

it was the leader, the one kai had been chasing. before kai could ignite his blades, the villain’s arms hooked around your neck, dragging you backward. a jagged, glowing blade was pressed dangerously close to your throat.

“stay back, red ninja!” the villain growled, his voice a mechanical rasp. “i saw the way you looked at her. if you want your bride to live, you’ll drop your weapons!”

kai froze. his flames died out instantly, his face pale. “she’s not—”

“quiet!” the villain snapped, tightening his grip. “i don’t care for your denials! a prize like this is worth more than all the gold in ninjago!”

kai’s jaw tightened. “damn it. can’t a guy admire a beautiful, badass girl in peace anymore?” he let out a low grumble. he didn’t look at the villain, he looked at you. he saw the way you weren’t screaming—you were looking for an opening. 

a puzzle to solve.

jay looked at kai, then at you, his eyes wide. “uh, kai? this is your chance to be her knight in shining armor!”

“hey, [name]!” kai called out, his voice surprisingly steady. “remember what i said about being fast?”

“i’m not slow!” you yelled back.

“good. then duck!”

in a blur of red, kai launched. at the same moment, jay sent a bolt of lightning to distract the villain’s grip; cole slammed the ground, throwing the villain off balance; and zane formed ice under the villain to provide a slippery landing. 

you dropped to your knees just as a wave of heat roared over your head—kai’s fire blasted the villain back, sending him crashing into the stone wall. you hadn’t even hit the ground when kai’s arm was around your waist again, pulling you safely away from the wreck.

“see?” he muttered, breathing hard, eyes scanning you for any injuries. “told ‘ya it was a deadly mission.”

“and i told you,” you gasped, looking at the scorched villain, “i’d rather face this than my dad.”

kai let out a short, genuine laugh, finally letting go. “you’re insane. i think i’m starting to actually like you now.”

“i can see it clearly from how you actually called me out by name,” you attested.

“hey, lovebirds, hop on! it’s almost midnight, we gotta get the girl home!” jay yelled from the cockpit of the jet.

kai looks at you, his lips slowly tugging into a playful smirk. “so… your dad’s home?”

— ঌ —

the first half of the flight back was quiet, the hum of the jet’s engines the only sound in the cockpit besides jay’s occasional, off-key humming. kai was unusually fidgety. he kept adjusting his sleeves and checking his reflection in the glass—not just to fix his hair this time, but because he looked genuinely nervous.

“kai, you’re acting like you’re gonna propose and meet your father-in-law for the first time or something.” jay commented, breaking the quiet, his voice full of mischief.

kai grunted, shooting a sharp glare toward the pilot’s seat. “it’s not like that, it’s just…”

“yeah, i know,” you giggled, leaning back in your seat as the city lights began to appear below. “you’re worried about whether everything i said about my dad is true.”

“well, is it?” kai questioned, turning his body slightly to face you. “like, how is he truly as a person? you know… without all the exaggeration?”

you shrugged, your expression going dangerously blank. “he truly is a scary guy. one time, a guy accidentally scratched his car in a parking lot. my dad didn’t even yell. he just stared at the guy until he started crying and offered to pay for a whole new paint job on the spot.”

kai swallowed hard, his adam’s apple bobbing. “he… made a man cry? by staring?”

“yup,” you popped the ‘p’. “and you didn’t just scratch it, kai. you turned it into a campfire. if he has a ‘death stare’ for scratches, i can only imagine what he has for total vehicular combustion.

“and for basically kidnapping his precious daughter… well, he’s probably going to kill you,” jay added to his teasing.

kai went silent, his hands gripped tight on his knees. for a master of fire, he looked remarkably cold. jay burst into laughter, followed by you.

“he looks like he’s about to piss in his pants!” jay hollered.

“well, if you need to go, better hold it in until we arrive at my place,” you added onto the joke as you laughed.

“good news, he doesn’t need to hold it in for much longer ‘cause arriving at our destination in just a minute!” jay continued.

“shut up,” kai hissed, continuing into a ramble. “this a matter of life and death. what if he kills me? i can’t die, i have too much potential! not to mention, i’m literally too hot to die!”

jay rolled his eyes and sighed in exasperation. “whatever, dude.”

“you’re a ninja, kai. my dad is smart enough to know that he can’t take you on all by himself,” you said, patting his shoulder.

kai huffed, you can feel his shoulders relaxing. “yeah, you’re right. i’m literally the master of fire.”

“that’s the spirit!” you clasped your hands together. “besides, if anyone’s dying tonight, it’s probably gonna be me.”

the jet touched down softly on the asphalt of your street. the porch light was already on, casting a long, sharp shadow of a man standing by the front door with his arms folded over his chest.

“oh, boy,” jay whispered over the comms. “good luck, romeo. i’ll keep the engines running in case i need to scrape you off the driveway.”

as the canopy hissed open, kai took a deep breath, his “cool hero” swagger replaced by the stiff posture of someone walking toward a firing squad. he hopped out first, but instead of walking away, he offered you a hand to help you down. you stepped out behind him, watching as your dad marched down the driveway. his eyes scanned the empty space where his beloved sedan used to be, then landed squarely on the red-clad ninja.

kai stood perfectly still, looking like he was ready to face a dragon with nothing but a toothpick. “sir,” he started, his voice a half-octave higher than usual. “i’m kai. the red elemental ninja, master of fire. i wanted to… i am here to apologize. the destruction of your vehicle was a result of my actions during a high-stakes pursuit. i take full responsibility.”

he bowed his head and you held your breath, both waiting for the explosion. but your dad didn’t even spare another glance at the empty highway. 

dad rushed past kai and grabbed your shoulders, his face pale with worry, eyes looking you over for any soot, scratches, or burns. “the car is just metal,” your dad said, his voice thick with relief. “when i heard the news of the accident and how you weren’t coming home, i tried to call you multiple times, but i didn’t get any response. i didn’t care about the sedan—i was just terrified that i’d lost my daughter.”

kai blinked, completely caught off guard by the lack of screaming. “oh! uh, thank you, sir. truly. but... i actually still have a job to do. the city isn’t quite out of the woods yet, and the others are waiting for me to help with the aftermath.”

“a shame,” your dad nodded. “then how about tomorrow? five o’clock. we’ll have a proper meal—no explosions allowed.”

kai glanced at you, then back at your dad. a small, genuine smile—not his usual smirk—broke across his face. “i’d like that. i’ll be here. hopefully on time.”

“good. we’ll see you then,” your dad said, giving you one last squeeze before heading back toward the house to give you a moment of privacy.

the silence that followed was thick and incredibly awkward. you kicked at a loose pebble on the driveway, not quite sure where to put your hands.

“so,” you said, looking everywhere but at him. “thanks. you know... for not letting me become a human firework.”

“so much for dying, huh?” kai chuckled.

“what can i say? i like to be a little dramatic.”

“yeah, i can see that," kai rubbed the back of his neck, his face tinged with a bit of red that had nothing to do with his elemental powers. “anyways, thanks for... not letting those goons tear my jet apart. you’re actually pretty handy in a crisis, gas station girl.”

“like you, i’m not slow either,” you teased weakly.

“right. not slow." kai stepped back toward the jet, pausing with one hand on the frame. 

he looked at you, his eyes lingering for a second too long. “i’ll... see you tomorrow, then?”

“yeah,” you nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips. “see you, kai.”

“see ‘ya, [name].”

kai hopped into the cockpit, and as the jet roared back into the night sky, you could hear jay’s muffled laughter through the speakers: “was that a date, kai? did you just book a date with her?!”

you watched the blue streak disappear into the clouds, feeling the soot on your face and the exhaustion in your bones, and realized that for the first time today, you weren't thinking about the car at all.

— ঌ —

“you’re late,” you said, leaning against the doorframe with an expectant look.

“sorry, sorry! duty called,” kai panted, wiping a smudge of dried blood from his forehead. “a group of serpentine decided five o’clock was the perfect time for a bank heist. but i couldn’t come empty-handed.”

he stepped aside and pointed toward the driveway. your dad walked up behind you, peering over your shoulder. there, sitting exactly where the old car used to be, was the exact same model of sedan—same year, same color, but polished to a mirror shine. it even had that “new car” smell wafting through the air.

“consider the insurance claim closed,” kai said with a proud, slightly sheepish grin.

Your dad’s face lit up like a Christmas tree. “i... i don’t believe it. It’s perfect!”

dinner went surprisingly well. kai was on his best behavior, telling stories of his missions (with only a little bit of exaggeration) while your dad kept his plate full. by the time dessert was finished, your dad was patting kai on the back like they were old friends.

“alright, alright,” kai said, standing up and looking at you. “i paid back the car, but i think i owe you a ride that doesn't involve being chased by a tank. you up for it?”

you grabbed your jacket. “only if you promise not to ignite anything.”

outside, kai didn't lead you to the sedan. he led you to a sleek, customized red sports car parked further down the street. it looked like a piece of art.

“wait,” you said as you climbed into the passenger seat. “how did you get the sedan replaced so fast? and who fixed this car up? it looks high-tech.”

“my sister, nya,” kai said, shifting into gear. “she’s the real mechanical genius of the family. she spent all morning helping me track down that sedan and stayed up half the night finishing the tune-up on this one.”

you blinked. “sister? the girl who yelled at you through the comms at the gas station?”

“yeah,” kai laughed, the engine roaring to life as he pulled out onto the quiet street. “the one and only. why? you sound surprised.”

“i just... i thought maybe she was your girlfriend,” you admitted, looking out the window to hide the slight flush on your cheeks.

kai nearly choked on his own breath, the car swerving just a tiny bit before he corrected it. “no! duh. i wouldn’t be sitting here flirting with you all night if i had a girlfriend. give me some credit, [name].”

you turned back to him, a challenge in your eyes. “flirting? Is that what you call it? because you’re still my least favorite ninja, kai.”

kai shifted into a higher gear, the city lights blurring into long streaks of neon as he accelerated. he shot you that signature, annoying, absolutely magnetic smirk.

“we’ll see if you still claim that by the end of the ride.”

a.n: IAM BACK with um something unusual i know hehe. i've been DEEP in ninjago hyper fixation ever since my brother made me watch the whole series with him. i noticed that we lack ninjago fits so i decided to take matters into my own, lego hands BUT i have not written any fics for a long while. this baby is my warm up. hopefully, i'll have more time to write self-indulgent fics heh. DONT FORGET TO REBLOG PLS!

[zuheia]

BEFORE YOU FOLLOW

i am a minor born in 2007. i goes ia a lot since im often busy with school, im still learning how to manage my time. this also means that i don't have a consistent update schedule so please don't expect much from me. im a multi fandom writer and this is a sfw blog. that's pretty much it.

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if you're racist, homophobic, islamphobic, xenophobic, ableist, or sexist—(un)kindly get off this blog. if you're 26+ or -14. if you're uncomfortable with me calling you pet/nick names and such bc i call everyone my bro my bae my dude my babeski my pookie wookie my snookums my honey bunch sugar pie 🥺 oh and DNI if you a hater 😒 only kabukimono slash kunikuzushi slash scaramouche slash hat guy can be a hater ‼️ 😈 (pls be kind to me im fragile 🙁)

[zuheia]

i have a fear of being shadow banned now

[zuheia]

this acc is just so incase i got shadow banned lol

[zuheia]

i have a fear of being shadow banned now