hello vonnie
Not today Justin
oozey mess
Peter Solarz
Mike Driver
titsay
Misplaced Lens Cap
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Keni
NASA
ojovivo
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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official daine visual archive
Noah Kahan
Game of Thrones Daily
trying on a metaphor
YOU ARE THE REASON
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
ellievsbear
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@zynabee
it’s funny how people say that same-sex couples shouldn’t have children and say that children need a male and a female parent to be healthy but there’s 13.6 million single parents in the USA and i’m pretty sure having one parent is worse than having two so maybe you should try sort that out
It’s getting crowded in heaven, so one day Saint Peter decides to only accept people who make him laugh.
A man came walking up to the Pearly Gates, and Saint Peter said to him:
“Alright bud, you’re only getting in today if you can make me laugh, so why don’t you tell me about how you died.”
The man looked at Saint Peter and said, “Oh man, it was awful! I was absolutely sure my wife was having an affair, so I left work early to come home and try to catch her in the act. When I got home, sure as shit there she was, naked on the bed! I looked all over the apartment, but I couldn’t find the guy anywhere. So I went outside on our 25th story balcony, and there he was!! Hanging over the edge by his fingertips! So I ran inside, and grabbed my hammer and ran back outside and started smashing his hands and fingers with it! He finally let go, and he fell down 25 stories but he landed in some bushes, so I ran inside and using all of my might, I grabbed my refrigerator, picked it up, and threw it over the rail and on top of the guy, crushing and killing him!! But all of the strain and exertion from picking up the refrigerator gave me a heart attack and I died.”
Saint Peter let out a faint chuckle, and since it was a crime of passion, he decided to let the poor soul in.
Another man came walking up to the pearly gates, and Saint Peter told this man the same thing—that in order to get in, he was going to have to make Saint Peter laugh. So the second started to tell Saint Peter how he died.
“Oh man, it was awful! I was doing aerobics out on my 26th story balcony of my apartment, when all of a sudden a flock of birds came out of nowhere and started attacking me! I was trying to get away, but I fell over the edge of my railing! However, on my way down I managed to grab the railing of the apartment below mine…but then this maniac suddenly showed up and started smashing my hands and fingers with a hammer until I let go! Fortunately for me, I landed in some bushes, but then some guy dropped a freaking refrigerator on me!
Saint Peter chuckled again, let the second guy into heaven, and was realizing he has found a way he could really start enjoying his job! About that time, a 3rd man comes walking up to the pearly gates, and Saint Peter gave him the speech about needing to make him laugh, and asks him how he died.
“Oh man, you’re never going to believe this shit! Alright, so picture this—I’m butt naked and hiding in a refrigerator…”
WE’VE TALKED ABOUT YOUR URL JEFF
my darling dear
I've never really talked about this, but I have been dealing with a lot of really mean comments and stuff, and the thing is I've dealt with these sort of comments for my entire time on the internet, and I've just dealt with them quietly. I have really thick skin so stuff doesn't really affect me all that much, I learned in school to just ignore bullying to make it go away but I'm tired of doing that. I shouldn't have to hide these negative feelings, I'm just a teen trying to have fun and be happy online as a fish. I don't have the best advice or anything, but anyone else out there who's dealing with bullying, it's okay to feel sad because of it. Don't take anything they say to heart, but repressing how you feel like what I have been doing is not good, it's better to speak out. I'm very sleepy so I'm going to go to bed now I'm sorry if this has bad grammar
i love you!!!!
I finally found this picture after searching for what felt like years. Spooky pup
it’s spoopy season
Free him
fool... he is sealed for our protection
why are brendon urie’s songs becoming normaller and normaller. we just got high hopes which was quite normal and now we have a collab with taylor swift
ok not to rant or anything but i hate koreaboos so much its unreal. literally u are so transparent. u treat korean ppl like they’re “uwu exotic” and think its ok to use an entire culture as an aesthetic. like its obvious that u dont see us as real people. literally the amount of times ppl have talked to me not because of me as a person but im korean and they want to me to tell them everything abt korea or speak to them in korean bc haha its a cute culture huh? its fucking aesthetic? and then koreaboos just turn the other fucking eye when ppl’s ethnic names get made fun of bc haha hehe hoyoung is a funny fucking name right like “hoe”young but its ok bc ur an ally u love korean culture u love the boy bands. koreaboos are so fucking transparent like the racism really jumps out asshole.
like my culture isnt ur aesthetic. it doesnt get to be that. you think its trendy and hip and cool to do use that but like u dont get to do that. u dont get to take the cute or friendly parts of korea bc u ignore literally everything else about our culture in order to get closer to ur boy band idols or whatever. korean culture isnt just kpop its dealing with the aftermath of the korean war its dealing with high suicide rates its dealing with ridiculously high beauty standards its dealing with the stigma against mental illnesses but the one thing it is not is ur fucking aesthetic.
im sry if this doesnt make much sense im just kinda pissed rn lol
this is ok 2 rb btw
thank you!!! i’m also korean and i love this post i agree so fuckin much
(long rant sorry lmao) but once this girl on youtube commented on a singer’s video with something like like “omggg you’re korean and you can sing! you should be a kpop idol” i replied with something along the lines of, “i’m korean, not everyone wants to be a kpop idol because it’s stressful, the beauty standards are fucking outrageous and idols are made to act a strictly certain way, like hyuna and edawn.” i told them my parents moved from korea to nz because of those reasons. and at least 3 other people who have never been to or lived in korea before, came rushing in to defend it. they were all “i bet you aint even korean, you’re just WISH you were. stop shitting on korea, you’re just jealous and mad because your parents were weak and poor and couldnt handle the most PeAcEfUl and BeaUtiFuL of countries!!!” and yikes
basically: “i’ve never lived there but i find it hard to believe people in korea is a three-dimensional country with flaws as well as good things”
someone i knew was talking about how much they hated their school because they didn’t like kpop and would make fun of them for having small eyes, but istg i get the feeling that if bts wasn’t a thing, she wouldn’t have had bat an eye at racism
im proud of being korean it’s just koreaboos romanticise it was too much that it’s gross
NOT MY RECIPE BUT HERE
COOKIE IN A CUP
also this is probably something Patton Sanders would do when he doesnt have enough ingredients for cookies but he wants a cookie anyway
anyone notice the third wheel lol
THANK YOU JENNI HERD
dang Jenni, GO OFF
You’re doing amazing sweetie
@likeshipsonthesea
Am I just being nice or am I flirting with you?? Bold of you to assume I know the difference
ok universe, i’m ready to feel good things. make me feel good things.
whenever i post this it works reblog if u want to feel good things & the universe will bring u something sweet
kim walker, who played heather chandler, died of a brain tumor. as in,
simple ways to feel better about your appearance
- shower everyday - wash your face + brush your teeth twice a day - find a face wash + a face moisturizer that suits your skin - floss in the morning + at night - put lotion on daily - spritz your favorite perfume - deodorant!! - shave regularly (if you so choose) w/ a nice razor - use a body scrub once a week - scrub/exfoliate your feet + moisturize them - keep your nails trimmed - keep your eyebrows under control - keep your hair clean - keep your hands + lips moisturized - wear your retainers if you’ve been slacking - drink lots of water - eat better - get 8 hours of sleep - exercise regularly - buy cute clothes that look flattering - wear make-up if you like it - look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you’re beautiful until you believe it
✨Pro Hoe Tips✨
1. Drink water with every meal, and between each meal. Hydration does wonders for your entire body. 2. Get yourself on a proper sleep schedule. Its easier to grind when you’re well rested. 3. Airspun translucent powder (Walgreens, $7) bakes ya makeup to the gods. Your shit won’t move for the entire day. Kiss ya fallout goodbye. 4. Brands like BH Cosmetics, Makeup Revolution, NYX, ELF, Essence, and Maybelline are all relatively cheap, good quality makeup brands for that last-all-night look 5. Dressing in neutrals like nudes, whites, blacks, and greys generally make your outfit choices easier to mix and match, without all the hustle of finding something to wear. Plus you’ll look like a fuckin baddie 6. Let your eyebrows grow, for the love of God. Castor oil and coconut make ya eyebrows and lashes grow thick and long, and ABH Brow Whiz is the shit for long lasting, natural looking brows. Seriously worth every penny. 7. Eat fresh fruit and stay away from processed sweets for a healthy, fresh smelling/tasting pussy 8. Roll non scented deodorant onto your pussy after you shave to avoid any razor bumps or ingrown hairs (DO NOT PUT NEAR YOUR ACTUAL VULVA, JUST THE OUTSIDE PORTION) 9. Make ya blowjobs wet, sloppy, and be sure to make eye contact as ya lick it. He’ll be putty in your hands 10. Coconut oil hoes👏👏👋 good for scars, stretch marks, cellulite, dry skin, you name it 11. Be sure to find your actual skin type, and look up ingredients in products that help according to your skin type. For example, skin products with salicylic acid help normal/oily skin, while glycolic acid helps dryer, aged skin. 12. Products and moisterizers with urea and ammonium lactate can help clear your keratosis pilaris (KP, the little bumps on your arms/legs/ass/cleavage) 13. Exercise regularly, and change up your workouts every couple of months to keep your body challenged 14. Never send your face in nudes. Make your nudes unidentifiable, in case you encounter a fuckboy who leaks them because hes an asshole. Protect yourself girl. 15. Always keep an extra change of clothes in your car, in case of an accident, dress code violation, or fashion emergency 16. Keep ya grades up, get a job, and make your own money so you don’t have to be financially dependent on some fuckboy. 17. Keep your cuticles moisturized for stronger, healthier nails (especially when wearing acrylics) 18. Take biotin pills to boost hair and nail growth, healthy skin, and kickstart metabolism. 19. Take selfies and nudes at all times to boost that body confidence. Snapchat has a password protected “My Eyes Only” option in Memories that you can hide these in if you’re shy. 20. Literally just worry about you babygirl stay unbothered
Thats all for now hoes✨✨
in honor of the new year, i’m gonna repost all my fav hoe tips! enjoy babes!
Hoe Wisdom - Manipulation
I learned from a very young age to make people believe about me exactly what I want them to. I learned how to walk, sit, move, and even eat in a way that makes me seem in complete control of myself and my surroundings, even when I’m feeling completely overwhelmed and out of place. I learned to hide my anxieties and insecurities in a way that everyone thought I was always calm and put together. I also learned how to get people to trust me and tell me everything about them by masterfully displaying those very weaknesses. I’ll share some of my tips tonight, these tips might help you seem in complete control, help you get what you want and even who you want ;)
WHEN YOU’RE ALONE AMONGST A LOT OF PEOPLE - If you’re alone don’t stress about the fact that you are, don’t worry about looking like a loser because you won’t. > When you’re alone be sure to keep your posture. ALWAYS TAKE NOTE OF YOUR POSTURE. I cannot stress how important your posture is. Look up how to keep a proper posture. >Snack slowly and take small bites, small and assured sips of your drink. Not too slow, just measure yourself. > Learn how to strut. When you walk across the room to sit, to snack, or just anywhere, don’t slack on your walking. Chin up, stare straight ahead, perfect posture, and have a very slight smile. The world is your catwalk, and yes people will be paying attention when you least notice it.
WHEN SOMEONE APPROACHES YOU - If they’re a close friend you don’t have to worry much about how to talk to them because you know them, but your behavior still matter. > When talking to them make sure you pay close attention to them and what they’re saying. No extreme reactions, unless they truly said something shocking. > Smile a lot, let others see that you can be approachable. Also, they’re your close friend you should be smiling anyway. - If they’re someone you barely know then just breathe in, smile, release your breath slowly and greet them politely. > Ask then questions about their life you have some knowledge about. Ask about their family, pets, children, partners, work/school, make sure they’re the ones speaking more than you are. - If they’re a stranger wait until they’re immediately in your personal space to acknowledge them, then meet and greet them only after they have directly addressed you. Keep an easy smile on your face, and when meeting them change your smile according to the impression you want to make (dazzling smile to charm, smirk to seduce, smile politely for anyone else). > For strangers you don’t know anything about them, ask them about things you are at least somewhat curious about. Ask them about their current standing in terms of job and or studies. Ask them about family and hobbies. Anything you would like to know or need to know to get some info on them. > Make a lot of eye contact, but not too much, but make sure to keep your attention on them. Make them feel that you care about what they’re saying.
WHEN YOU’RE IN A GROUP Besides all the other things about posture, eye contact and smiling, when you’re in a group this is where the whole “pay them complete attention” does not apply. In a group make sure to pay attention to everyone speaking, let everyone have a turn at your attention. People who were steamrolled out of a conversation you ease them back in either by giving them your attention and let them speak to you directly, or if you’re feeling bold politely call out the person or people who steamrolled over them by calmly stating “I’m sorry to interrupt but [their name] was speaking, I want to know what they were going to say.” Don’t do that if you don’t feel confident, or if you care about possibly offending others, you should still operate within your comfort zone so that you can portray a genuine look of collected confidence.
NOW YOU’RE IN, HOW TO GET THEM TO TRUST YOU - This is when you can start showing people bits of your true self. You should have real stories and anecdotes ready for when you get the chance to use them. - Real stories and anecdotes are crucial because believe it or not people are actually adept at intuitively spotting liars. If the stories and anecdotes are real, with genuine feeling attached to them, they can’t spot any lies because they will be the truth. - Manipulating people is not about lying, it’s about using the truth to your advantage. Avoid lying and avoid exaggerating, so that everything you say and do is genuine. - The stories and anecdotes you use must have some connection to the context of the conversation or the person you’re with. Don’t bust out a story of a dying pet when the person you’re with never even had a pet. Don’t talk about how you once failed an exam when the conversation was about this concert he went to with his friends last week. Talk about things in context, and if you have no material for a certain context then don’t stress, you don’t need to have something to say for everything. For every time you talk to them only share one personal story, avoid using more because then that shows too much of you. - You want to show some humanity, but not too much because you want them to still believe that you’re some ethereal and strong entity that could probably crush them if they cross any lines.
To end, I just want to say that with this post I don’t mean to imply that you need to act this way to be desired, to get what you want, or to be considered amazing. This is not the case at all. However, I know for a fact that some of y'all struggle with confidence and that you wish you knew how to display confidence even when you don’t have it. Well this is a way to fake it until you make it. My blog is about loving yourself, but I know how long and tiresome that process can be. This is just a way to put yourself out there. There’s so much info I still didn’t cover because then the post would be even longer, for any more info just ask me! None of y'all should feel that you HAVE to do what this post says to get people to notice you and like you, I don’t want any of you to compromise yourselves for the sake of people that don’t matter. But I know some of you want this, I found myself looking up a lot of this information way back when before Tumblr had this huge and informed community of wonderful people willing to share their knowledge. I love all of you and I hope I’ve helped some of you in any way.
