celeritas

var sc_project=11042911; var sc_invisible=1; var sc_security="e3570154"; var scJsHost = (("https:" == document.location.protocol) ? "https://secure." : "http://www."); document.write(""); born as byun baekhyun. 21. literature undergraduate. part-time delivery boy.

[1-900bae-blog]

hyejvng:

@1-900bae.

…

“byun baekhyun!” she exclaims, stomping her foot when he starts reminiscing the memories that would ruin her ego. “stop! shut the fuck up– don’t even dare go there.” but he did, and god hyejung was embarrassed. “sailor moon is the shit, don’t fuckin’ bring them into this.” she mumbles, depending her favorite show to watch when she was a young girl. she stood there in one of his t-shirts, too long for her to be considered a t-shirt. “listen. i was nine. did you think i had any common sense? your mother told you to help me to dress up. you didn’t even help! useless piece of shit.” the amount of curse words that slipped out could show how badly he had scarred her (not in a negative way.) she uses her hands to pull her hair up into pigtails, pouting before tilting her head. “that’s not. you don’t. you shouldn’t even be thinking of me re-enacting things like that. your eyes would probably stay attached to.. yeah. okay. next topic.”

“Oh. You’re pulling the full name card on me, I must have hit a nerve good this time,” chewing around the swell of his lower lip, he mocks a look of solemnity before a grin plasters itself wide and boyish across his profile once again. He eyes the slope of Hyejung’s brows and the messily ridiculed pigtails in her hands, his laughter roaring with the amusement once his own hand reaches out to tweak a missed strand of hair up wordlessly. “Now, why would I have helped when I can watch you struggle with the dress? It was my only chance to witness your head stuck and twisted into the fabric, I don’t really get to do that anymore, do I? Now I have a grown woman bickering here and there with me like an old pair of grandparents -not that I can whine about it. Gonna keep you close to my heart even when you’re as wrinkly as a dried prune. Pretty sure my eyes can stay unattached too by then, killed two birds with one stone. You need to excuse me though, I really gotta search for sailor moon lingerie for an upcoming birthday of....someone. Someone-not-called-Hyejung. Pft.”

[1-900bae-blog]

📣 @hvunvoo​

“Well fuck me.” It was much more dramatic to have his words echo up the staircase ahead. There was the slickness of heat on the sides of his face, his hair matted across his forehead while leaning forward to rest both of his hands on the ripped cloth of his jeans above knees. By his side was a feast aptly packaged and parcelled into the delivery box on the ground, long casted aside by the delivery boy for the sake of a deep breath or two and his sanity. 

50-X Hangangro, Hangangno-dong. Level 10-b.

There was no mistakes, no slips in his reading or glitches in his GPS. The bold letters in front of the apartment site announced the same name, save for the existence of a ‘X’ building. Then it became something like a chase after an urban ghost story among the buildings under the burning heat of summer weather, head clouded by the helmet into a sauna plight. This was the sixth building he stepped into, 50-L, with 21 floors towering up in the sky with a shadow upon his scooter outside. As if his short but admittedly tiring tour around the neighborhood wasn’t challenging enough, short crescents of a strong grip lingered on the sweaty core of his palm once his hand let go of the weighty delivery box with a groan. A family feast meal with 10 fried chicken items, big fries, special sauce with side dishes were not worth it. A growl from his stomach agreed -nudging him into glancing back down at the red box on the ground with a pair of narrowed eyes. 

“Need some help? I sorta know this neighborhood like the back of my hand.” Back to sanity, it is. Baekhyun fixed his hunched shoulders with a quick recover, his hands dusting off the remains of his short-lived, highly unprofessional thoughts.  His face contorted into a silhouette of a look that would normally be reminiscent of a smile but the sweat burning in the corners of his eyes and ache across his arms for lifting a family set menu for too long made it look rather pained. 

“Oh. Shit--,” he fumbled around his helmet clumsily, tugging it up and off his head with a bit of a struggle. “Yes, please, I kinda really need some help right now. Is there a 50-X around here somewhere or am I tricked into a fake delivery? Because I’m pretty sure I’m not prepared for a journey up into the damned heat of Mordor. Without a Samwise at my side too. ”

[vnconsoled]

[lepetitchatblanc]

[1-900bae-blog]

❝ If I can’t be the best, I sure as hell can be the worst! ❞

❝ Wanting to be the best was the most human thing in the world. Baekhyun had a chronic position himself looking back at his childhood when he arrived home after watching the overwhelmed glances between his friends at a Ki Tigers game with a competitive look to say ‘I wanna play baseball’. After two weeks of training and many humiliating misses of the pleasant sound of a ball hitting his bat, he reached home with the very same determined purse of his lips to announce ‘I quit’. There was something bristled in the base of his gut, winding the air out of his pride each time someone’s bat flowed artfully in the air to meet a throw when his own remained like a weak limp across his body structure.  If not be the best, why even try? 

The bat in his hands wavered with the unsure swing of pride remains. There was an uncanny intellectual underscore beneath the grounds people felt more degraded to be the second best  than the last (the kid who came second in exam scores appeared much more insulted at school than the carefree, grinning delinquent at the back seat). Baekhyun understood now with the wisdom of his fresh adulthood; the ‘what if’s and wrong hope in a person who came second is much dense on their shoulders than those with no weight of a hope and ambition.

“Now that’s some good motto for a criminal propaganda video. If you cannot be the president, why not be an armed burglar or serial killer? Join in the dark side,” there’s a pause as his eyes narrow for a momentary thought, his fingers toying with the rousing thought process before reaching down to lace together loosely with a resolution. “This is either gonna be my next muse for a best-seller novel or your reason to be in a jail but hey, totally gonna bring you the best --not the second best tteokbokki of the town at my visits.❞

[odaro]

[timbllr]

Self-Described and Self-Defined, 1965 - Kosuth, Joseph (Museu Coleção Berardo, Lisbon)

[1-900bae-blog]

❛ you could have told me that you asked me to come over just to kill some time.. inside. then I wouldn't have came at all. ❜

❛ As if. Baekhyun rested ungraceful and slack against the doorframe with his arms folded haphazardly over the plane of his chest while eyeing the latter with a bold grin. There was a ripple of something impish across his face but he kept silent for a moment to shrug instead. He could have mocked a look of sheepishness if he tried, tilt his head to the side with his lips pursed as an uncomfortable flush seared up his neck. But it all would stink suspicious when his eyes remained so light and carefree.

“I could have,” it was the same tone of voice he’d used from an earlier age on while asking for an extra snack treat from his parents, some pocket money from his grandmother and a bite of dish from their restaurant chef. Reeked of a poorly concealed impudence and spoil. “but then I wouldn’t have someone to help with unpacking some boxes at home and it’d be a pity. Now I got some free labor on my doorstep, lured into my web.” 

His hands rubbed together to mock an evil character, something based awfully on the villains of stories and movies. A laughter followed the suit, ringing high and pitched with an echo across the hallway, down the stairs ahead. “Come inside already, I’ll treat you meat at least. ❜

[erosboi-deactivated20130619]

[1-900bae-blog]

"why do you enjoy watching me suffer so?"

❝ The query ‘why’ has always been the most complex out of other question marks. Perhaps that’s why children favoured it more than other disputes, starting from a young age when they happen to be looking out of window and out of thin air, the neon light strikes to urge them into a journey of a hundred questions starting with ‘why’. Why is the sky blue, why are my eyes brown, why is water called water, why is it bad to fart in front of people. It’s an undeniable truth. Humankind lacks the reasoning for everything, blanking out even when asked about the true rationality underneath a human behaviour and need. Baekhyun had always been a fan of the subject matter with a stack of books on psychology and sociology in the abandoned corner of his bedroom to prove. He’d also been a fan of the question himself, driving his parents into a state of quiet followed by a frustrated groan. 

So when asked the question ‘why’ by Yejun, he honestly paused to fall silent as his fingers habitually scratched along the pathway of his neck idly, itching subtle red streaks in its wake to fade. “Well, if Freud was to make an analysis out of this, he’d definitely bring it up to my father or mother regarding sadistic tendencies as he always does with cases but-- uh, I’m gonna stick to ‘I like your reactions’ as a safe choice. You do that angry bird thing with your brows and your face is rather expressive about how much you’re hating it.  Sounds like a sadist in-the-making indeed. ❞

[1-900bae-blog]

❝ Who wears pants anymore? So 2015. ❞

❝ What the– Yoo Hyejung. I didn’t take you for a part-time nudist and supporter, except for that distant memory of you half-naked in your Sailor Moon undies when you were like 5 but then again…pretty sure you don’t want me recalling that. In fact, do you remember that one time you took off your dress in front of my very pure 9 year old eyes and–,” with a hand placed on top of his chest and an exaggerated, dragged-out sigh heavy on his tongue, he hung his head low to hide the quirk of his lips despite the smile beneath words. “God, I needed some footage to blackmail you at this age, you were so damn cute with your pigtails. You can still reenact some of my memories but you’d be categorised under a different category in viral videos and I’d be in the corner watching all this unfold. With my pants on still. ❞

[problemheart]

[moiju-deactivated20140701]

[hugal]

(via @momsen.wang on Instagram)

[trcshymemes]

GAME GRUMPS SENTENCE STARTERS. 

❝ God, what if we just fucked one day? ❞

❝ Don’t sass me in front of the internet. ❞

❝ Follow your stupid fucking dreams. ❞

❝ Come at me scrub lord, I’m ripped. ❞

❝ I just wanna have sex with space. ❞

❝ Get in the tub with me, daddy. ❞

❝ Will you just relax and let me kill for money? ❞

❝ That sounds like your problem. Fuck you. ❞

❝ Stay in school. Don’t do drugs. Eat your teeth. ❞ 

❝ Make like a tree and fucking die. ❞

❝ Dude just…just pity laugh at least. ❞

❝ Man, Club Penguin’s gotten weird. ❞

❝ We are like the Stephen Kings of stupid. ❞

❝ Why do you enjoy watching me suffer so? ❞

❝ Do I have to jerk you off to blow your mind? ❞

❝ I haven’t had so much fun since I killed my parents. ❞

❝ Unfortunately I had sex with a guy/girl over the weekend. ❞

❝ What’s a vegetarian zombie say? GRAAAAAAAINS. ❞

❝ Revenge is a best dish served fuck you. ❞

❝ Who wears pants anymore? So 2015. ❞

❝ I need an ice cream sandwich and a gentle blowjob. ❞

❝ Don’t let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya. ❞

❝ The bananas has gone bad! ❞

❝ I cared for those bananas! I raised them with my own two feet! ❞

❝ Did you know I’m a professional joke? My life is a joke. ❞

❝ What if everyone just had constant helicopter dick? ❞

❝ [ name ], does getting me wet fill you with determination? ❞

❝ I can’t prove that someone ISN’T a reptilian. ❞

❝ Wouldn’t it be funny if, like, you lost a family member? ❞

❝ These balls are coming at me fast and furious. It’s like that movie, ‘Speed’. ❞ 

❝ Call me One Direction ‘cause my relevancy is dropping by the day. ❞ 

❝ One time I killed a person and I didn’t report it to the police. ❞

❝ I wanna take a girl to the Grand Canyon, fuck her, and throw her in. ❞ 

❝ Nothing like a gunshot wound to the face to really mellow someone out. ❞ 

❝ If I can’t be the best, I sure as hell can be the worst! ❞ 

❝ [ name ], I’m on a date with a guy/girl right now and you’re embarrassing me. ❞

❝ I’ve made a decision. I’m gonna in the kitchen, gonna open the dishwasher, and I’m gonna climb inside. ❞

❝ I do apologize for my actions, even though they were totally and completely justified. ❞

❝ I could pee on this couch, right now, no problem, while looking you directly in the eyes.❞ 

❝ Look, you tell a couple jokes as a dad and suddenly everyone’s like ‘you’re making dad jokes.’ ❞

❝ All of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are blue, except for three of them. And there are four. ❞ 

❝ And Abraham said unto Moses, ‘Bro, dude, aliens.’ ❞

❝ I’m gonna throw you out the window. We don’t even have any windows in this room…I’m gonna carve out a window and throw you through it. ❞ 

❝ DO IT YOU SACK OF SHIT! – Sorry. That didn’t come out as encouraging as I meant it to. ❞

❝ [ name ], if there’s one thing I can be totally honest about, it’s that I would happily lie to your face.❞

❝ If I took pole-dancing, I would be worried that it would be too erotic for everybody else. ❞

❝ Next time we make love, [ name ], would you please refer to me as your sweet cakey treasure? ❞   

❝ I try to show at least one other human-being my butt hole every single day. ❞

❝ The only people who don’t like sluts are the people who don’t get any. ❞ 

❝ Have you ever though of a career in driving people fucking insane? Because you are already a PRO at it. ❞ 

❝ I am actively looking for ways to get you to shut the fuck up. ❞

❝ First of all, you have to stop calling it ‘Mary Jane.’ That’s the first rule of stonerdom. People will think you’re a fucking narc. ❞

❝ First of all, no one says ‘pot-eyes’, you fuckin’ narc. ❞

❝ If by OK you mean like on the inside I’m just going ‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!’ then yes, I’m quite OK ❞

❝ When you walk outside there are three elements of nature that you must avoid: snow, wind, and bees. ❞ 

❝ Could you imagine if you unlocked outfits in real life? Like, “Congratulations you wiped your ass, here’s a new shirt.” ❞

[ethereal-baek]

shy puppy B (๑￫‿￩๑)

[stability]