Amethyst Orchid

[twinterrors29]

I think it would be very funny if after Obi-Wan kills Maul in Rebels, an entire small army of Mandalorians turned up in the desert (led by Sabine, who got tipped off by Ezra) to harass him into becoming the rightful leader of their government

[mothnem]

Ezra: Hey Sabine? You know what would make Bo Katan absolutely HATE you?

Sabine: I'm all ears.

Later

Obi Wan: I DON'T WANNA!

Sabine: YES YOU DO! IT WOULD BE SO FUNNY!

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Vader, presenting his Space PowerPoint to Emperor Palpatine: And thats why Obi-Wan is secretly leading the Mandalorians and I must confront him.

Palpatine, having heard that name 5641 too many times since becoming emperor: Not to sound like the Jedi I worked very hard to destroy, but have you ever considered…letting go?

[mothnem]

Meanwhile Obi has been made Leader of the Mandalorians and somehow Luke is his heir and son now and SOMEHOW, SOMEWHERE he just KNOWS Qui Gon is laughing his butt off!

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Bail starts to hear rumors and then those rumors turn into something more substantial and. Is this it? This hadn’t been the plan, but then again nothing ever quite goes according to plan when it comes to Obi-Wan so.

Obi-Wan wakes up to the entire rebellion on his involuntarily obtained front porch.

[mothnem]

Obi needs a snack, to be a blanket burrito, and some cuddles ASAP at this rate.

Vader sends the chipped 212th after Obi Wan only for them to get snagged and dechipped by Rex's operation and now they are on their way to rescue their poor General. How did he get into this mess in the first place!?

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Obi-Wan trying and failing to get someone to fight him so he can pass off this job that he absolutely did not apply for. Cody standing there threatening anyone who so much as looks like they’re considering it. Their ideas of what a rescue entails are maybe slightly different.

[mothnem]

Obi Wan keeps accidentally becoming more and more popular as the Mandalore and at this rate, he's going down in history as one of the greatest of all time. And he declared war on the Empire by accident when he told one of his Mandalorian Advisors what he had seen at the Temple. Dead Children are an EXCELLENT motivator for Mandalorians.

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Getting rid of the anti-clone sentiment was on purpose. Starting a competition among all former death watch members to see who can successfully bring the most clones to Mandalore was not on purpose but was welcomed just the same. Stealing a good chunk of the Empire’s army was a great added bonus. The chips coming out of so many clones brought him more joy than Obi-Wan had known in years.

However. The plan was most definitely not to take over the Empire.

[mothnem]

Cody just tells him, "For what it's worth, I always thought you would make a better Chancellor than the one we had."

Obi Wan just sighs.

Bail thinks the whole thing is hilarious.

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Neither takes Obi-Wan up on any of his very generous offers to replace him. Obi-Wan is most put out.

[mothnem]

Of course not! Why would they? He's doing a great job! Everyone's happier! Vader has been literally eating the drywall over this and going insane! Why would they take over?

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Everyone is happier, including Obi-Wan, he’s just not about to give in and also will never, ever believe he’s the right one for this job.

[mothnem]

They've even rescued surviving Jedi! Yoda is back! Luke and Leia are friends now! Reva is there! But Obi Wan is still convinced he's not the best person for the job, but like all he does, he does his best.

Maybe his title is "Mandalore the Doubtful"? History books 0hrase it as him being skeptical of the Empire and their promises.

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

These books start to appear about three years after the former Emperor Palpatine’s timely demise. Yoda has the entire collection stashed away somewhere, Obi-Wan just knows it.

[mothnem]

Yoda: Education the Younglings, we must, Doubtful Mandalore.

Obi Wan: Not you too.

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Bo-Katan started the name and it backfired spectacularly. She may work hard, but the 212th works harder.

[mothnem]

212th: Oh? Gonna make our Jedi sound incompetent? WELL NOW HE WAS SKEPTICAL OF THE EMPIRE AND RIGHTFULLY SO!

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

I feel like this an excellent time for Quinlan Vos to show up. Just right in the middle of all of this.

[mothnem]

And no Obi, he's not taking the job either. He's here to swear ALLEGIANCE to you! Mostly because he knows it's going to drive Obi Wan INSANE. This is better than the time they snuck out of the Temple to go play Illegal Sabbac Games! (Not that playing Sabbac was illegal, but the people running it sure were!)

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

He has also somehow already gotten himself officially titled “First Minion.” It’s on his ID and everything. And since his slicing skills are sufficiently above Obi’s, it’s going to be staying that way. Cody is mad that he didn’t think of that first. Rex mentions that the title of consort is still open because he hasn’t had enough opportunities to be a little shit recently.

[mothnem]

Cody: THEN I'LL BE CONSORT THAN! TAKE THAT QUINLAN!

Rex: (dying of laughter)

Now, Ahsoka shows up and thinks the whole thing is hilarious and swears herself to service as well. She's Minion 2.

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

That’d be the best possible moment for Obi-Wan to walk into a room.

He immediately goes to Yoda for advice because he has no idea what he’s supposed to do right now.

Yoda: Authorized to officiate weddings I am, hmm? Help the Commander with this, I can.

Obi-Wan: *blue screens*

[mothnem]

The Wedding is beautiful. Talk of the galaxy for centuries. Particularly since Vader shown up and tried to challenge Obi Wan to a duel. Obi Wan kicked his ass for the third time.

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

The only part about any of the events surrounding the wedding that Cody is upset about is that he didn’t get to shoot Vader in the face.

Leia is upset she was evacuated “for her safety” and didn’t get to shoot Vader either.

She and Cody bond over the privation.

There are many Mandos, clones, and one (1) Quinlan Vos that are eagerly trying to support Cody and Leia’s dreams by supplying a variety of weapons and custom made targets featuring Sith portraits.

Obi-Wan would appreciate it if he stopped finding blasters in every cupboard.

[mothnem]

He got enough of them for his wedding from his the Mandalorians and Clones.

But after that, it quickly becomes apparent to the Empire, the Mandalorians are a rapidly growing threat. Their Republic, Obi Wan INSISTED on calling it that, is so enticing to the people suffering under the polished boots of the Moffs and the Emperor himself.

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Cody: And since fourteen new planets have joined your empire-

Obi-Wan: It is not my empire.

Cody, living his best life: Our empire, cyare, of course.

Obi-Wan: It’s a republic.

He finally gets an actual election set up but then everyone just votes for him as Emperor anyway. There wasn’t even an emperor option.

Supposing Darth Sidious/Emperor Palpatine is still alive at this point, he makes some grand statement saying how there can only be one Emperor.

The entirety of the somewhat newly (re?)formed Mandalorian Empire Republic Empire take this to mean a challenge has been issued to their Mand’alor.

[mothnem]

The Younglings are composing the Anthem of the New Mandalorian Empire as they speak.

Might keep Palpy alive just so he can freak out and wish he wasn't bald so he could pull his hair out screaming about Obi Wan. The biggest thorn to have ever lived.

[thisiswhereikeepdcthings]

And worst of all? Vader. Won’t. Shut. Up. Like, he brought up obi-wan all the time before this entire Mandalorian fiasco, but now?

Some very fearless acolytes keep a little scoreboard in the torture break room that has a time since Vader was last overheard saying “Kenobi.”

Since word of the guy apparently restarting the Mandalorian Empire got out the count has not made it past one day. They started counting it in hours. Five hours is the max so far. And that’s mostly because Vader was unconscious.

[mothnem]

Vader: Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Kenobi Ken.....

Palpatine: I should have left you to burn on Mustafar.

It doesn't help that APPEARENTLY Kenobi has CHILDREN. Baby Kenobis.

(Might make this so Obi Wan was raising Luke.)

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Did it on the wrong blog last time oops. Anyway.

Baby Kenobis.

Palpatine doesn’t get nightmares. He doesn’t. But maybe he has one or twelve dreams-that-are-definitely-not-visions-nope-nuh-uh that are… Look, he’s a Sith Lord. The Sith Lord. He doesn’t get “scared” and “apprehensive,” he strikes fear into the hearts of everyone who dares to oppose him. But, just maybe, there’s one (1) thing that causes him… mild concern…….. And the thought of Kenobi having spawned, thereby giving his apprentice even more reasons to utter that name and more people to obsess over….

Kenobi has been an irritant for a couple decades and now he’s going to have to deal with his force-cursed offspring? (Literally. They have the force. They are nothing compared to him, of course, but still.)

[mothnem]

It will only be worse when they find out the Luke Kenobi in Question is also the son on Vader and Padme. Complete and utter obsession.

But they also adopted some cute little children too! Luke loves being a big brother.

Meanwhile, Palpatine's drywall contractor is getting very wealthy indeed because he has to keep calling them after Vader ate the drywall for the 12th time that week.

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

And like, most people don’t know Darth Vader is Anakin Skywalker. That’s not a Known Fact which just adds to the overall soap opera level drama of everything going on. You can bet all your credits that there are billions of beings just really invested in watching this all play out.

Was the Senator having an affair with the Sith dude? Did she and Skywalker die tragically at the hands of their former lover? Is Kenobi the ex? Is there some kind of tragic twins separated at birth situation going on here (except most people think it’s like, Anakin Skywalker and Darth Vader. Or Darth Vader and Obi-Wan)?

There are some very out there ideas, but the general consensus actually ends up being almost close to the truth, if the truth were being reflected through a bunch of fun house mirrors.

Palpatine is wondering if it’s against Sith law or whatever to retire. He wonders if there is anywhere left in the galaxy he could go and never have to hear the name Kenobi ever again. Because is this worth it, really? He got his empire, sure, but Force, at what cost?

[mothnem]

At the cantina

"It's a 'good twin, evil twin' situation. The Sith, old Palpy, probably wanted them to grow up evil which is why he had Vader."

"Are you implying Emperor Kenobi is the evil twin?"

"Well not anymore, the Jedi raised it out of him."

General consensus is, Padme had an affair with Vader, but an unwilling one. She thought it would keep her love, Skywalker, safe from the war. But it didn't work and Vader killed them both. Obi Wan is raising his nephew since he and Vader are brothers by blood and he and Anakin were brothers by choice.

Cody is NOT helping and he's feeding the rumors.

[thisiswhereikeepstarwarsthings]

Rex and Ahsoka spend way too much time on the holonet adding their “theories.”

Obi-Wan walks in on them scheming hanging out, sighs, and walks back out.

Cody walks in on them and gives suggestions. He has a few ideas he’s been sitting on for a while that he thinks would work really well.

[mothnem]

Cody: Okay, Obi Wan is practically the embodiment of light, think we can pull that off?

Ahsoka: Oooooh! Godhood! He's going to HATE that! Rex! Logistics on raising Obi Wan to godhood!

Rex: Give me a week and Obi Wan was found in a golden cradle on the front steps of the Jedi Temple.

[fanfic-obsessed]

Obi Wan hears about the Godhood rumors and contemplates defecting to Palpatine's Empire. Surely Palpatine would be willing to kill him, right. Then he would not have to deal with ascending to godhood.

[writerxwren]

I've come to the realization that 90s comic Mara Jade was clearly just Gillian Anderson and there is absolutely no downside to this I just thought everyone should know

[linnet77]

Dear fanfic authors: Lightsabers may be your character's life. They may be the inanimate representation and resonance of their very soul. They may be ALL KINDS of colors! But grasping something with your hands that emits a beam of plasma hot enough to cut through solid rock requires a rather hefty handle. Especially if it's meant to be a two-handed weapon. Please, for the love of the Force, do not say that someone can hide this gigantic honkin' two-fister of a weapon down inside your character's boot.

[maybe-murphy]

wanted to draw something soft ♡( ◡‿◡ )

[elli-incarnate]

Hear me out: the funniest way to read the Emperor's Hand is as Darth Sidious accidentally honoring the traditions of his homeworld.

Because obviously TTT, Mara Jade, and the Emperor's Hand as a concept predate both the PT and Palpatine being from Naboo, but they're all perfectly backwards compatible.

And the Naboo handmaiden system is objectively insane.

I love it! It rules!

It is ALSO insane.

George Lucas was, as always, operating primarily on vibes and mythic imagery rather than asking uncomfortable sociological questions, but if you stop and think about the institution for more than a solid minute, it immediately starts raising eyebrows.

What kind of society elects a teenage queen and then surrounds her with a cadre of teenage noblewomen trained to impersonate her, carry weapons, participate in security operations, keep state secrets, and potentially DIE in her place?? That's not even a hypothetical, that's Cordé.

That's a state security apparatus specifically created from child soldiers wearing silk and makeup.

My favorite headcanon is that the answer lies buried in the institution itself!

Once upon a time, someone kept trying to kill the Queen.

Maybe it was rival houses. Maybe succession disputes. Maybe civil war. Doesn't really matter, the point is that Naboo's history was far uglier than its idyllic image suggests.

Eventually some desperate monarch, cornered by enemies and running out of options, came up with a brilliant solution: every major noble family would send a daughter to court. They would be honored guests publicly ... functionally they would also be hostages. They would be trained to fight, trained to serve, trained to imitate the Queen's speech and mannerisms so thoroughly that no assassin could ever be entirely certain who they were killing.

Viewed through that lens, the institution suddenly starts making a little more sense. What noble is going to sponsor a plot against the throne when the young woman wearing the crown might actually be his own daughter? Every major family now has a personal stake in the monarch's survival. The knives are still there, but now everyone has to think twice before drawing them.

Over centuries, the original purpose becomes obscured. The hostages become companions. The companions become handmaidens. The coercion gets wrapped in honor.

Which is exactly how cultural institutions survive.

And if you accept that premise, Naboo becomes a much more interesting place. Beneath the fountains and beautiful architecture is a society that normalized masks, doubles, hidden identities and carefully managed appearances.

The Queen pretends to be a handmaiden.

The handmaiden pretends to be the Queen.

Political survival depends on controlling appearances.

Which is EXACTLY THE CULTURE that should produce a Sith Lord in the exact flavor of Darth Sidious.

For most Naboo, the culture of masks and doubles becomes a defensive adaptation; for Palpatine, it becomes a worldview. The future Emperor spends decades pretending to be a kindly public servant while secretly engineering galactic catastrophe. He presents himself as a grandfatherly statesman while running the largest conspiracy in galactic history. He doesn't reject Naboo's political culture; he internalizes it and weaponizes it. Which is extremely Sith.

And then we get to the handmaidens themselves.

Because I am convinced that Senator Palpatine watched the events of TPM unfold and took notes.

Imagine him sitting there watching a bunch of fourteen-year-old girls with blasters repeatedly interfere with his plans.

Not just the Jedi or elite soldiers or master spies.

Handmaidens.

Loyal. Adaptable. Good at disguises. Comfortable with deception. Willing to risk their lives for the person they serve. Every time one of Padmé's girls successfully pulls off another switcheroo or security operation, Palpatine's reaction isn't just annoyance but professional admiration.

Somewhere in the back of his mind there has to be a moment of: I want one.

Not a handmaiden, exactly. That's too obviously Naboo. But the concept? The concept is excellent.

Fast forward a few decades!

Palpatine is Emperor now. He takes the idea apart and rebuilds it according to Sith principles.

He keeps the loyalty. He keeps the secrecy. He keeps the personal service and the ability to operate independently. He keeps the willingness to sacrifice everything for the person at the center of the system. Then he strips away the humanity and replaces it with possession. He adds espionage, assassination, manipulation, and dark side conditioning.

Hmm, needs less sisterhood and more murder.

The result of course is Mara Jade.

At some point he absolutely had to workshop the title.

"Emperor's Handmaiden?"

No. Too obvious.

"Emperor's Hand."

Perfect, print it.

Everything gets scaled up, militarized, stripped of its humanity, and rebuilt in obsidian.

Which feels phenomenally appropriate for the dark side. Sith don't invent things from whole cloth. They corrupt, distort, and take something that already exists and twist it into a more selfish, controlling form.

And that's exactly what Palpatine does with Naboo. For all his claims of transcending ordinary beings, for all his efforts to become something greater than human, he never really stops being a product of his homeworld.

He just takes every institution he inherited and asks himself what the most evil possible version would look like.

The final irony is Mara herself.

Because in this reading she's the dark reflection of a Naboo handmaiden. She is the culmination of Palpatine's attempt to recreate and weaponize one of the defining institutions of his youth.

She's like the cultural fusion of Naboo and Sith cultures. Culturally orange chicken.

And after all that effort, after decades of planning and conditioning and control, she eventually defects, marries Luke Skywalker, and gets absorbed into the very family that destroys everything Palpatine built.

That's Star Wars AF.

[dragonnnerdd]

I like to sometimes think about the fact that Obi-wan taught Anakin that "your lightsaber is your life," and he consistently gives Cody his lightsaber

[dragonnnerdd]

I like to sometimes think about the fact that Obi-wan taught Anakin that "your lightsaber is your life," and he consistently gives Cody his lightsaber

[mycelliumelium]

May the 4th be with you!

(i feel like I'm being catapulted back to 2023, it's been So long since I did anything star wars)

[gffa]

#JEDI AND THE GUARDIANS SHARING THE SAME MANTRA #THEY MUST HAVE BEEN CLOSE TO SHARE SUCH AN IMPORTANT THING #JUST THINK HOW MUCH THEY MUST HAVE SHARED BETWEEN THEIR ORGANIZATIONS #AND HOW IT’S ALL GOING TO BE DESTROYED BY THE EMPIRE #NOT JUST THE JEDI OR THE GUARDIANS BUT BOTH WILL BE WIPED OUT

[iamanartichoke]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but as a creator -

I am fine with "the audience" -

downloading my fics

printing my fics

copy/pasting or screenshotting my fics

sharing your saved copy of my fics with anyone else who might want them in the unlikely but never impossible case that my fics are no longer available on ao3

making a book of my fic(s) and running your fingers across the pages while lovingly whispering my precioussss

doing these things with anything I create for fandom, such as meta, headcanons, au nonsense like 'texts from the brodinsons,' etc

I am not fine with "the audience"

doing any of the above with the purpose/intent of plagiarizing my work or passing it off as their own in any capacity

feeding my work into ai for any reason whatsoever

Save the fandom things. Preserve the fandom things. Respect the fandom things.

Enjoy the fandom things.

[writerxwren]

So unfortunately I found this while scrolling through Pinterest on my phone and ofc the artist wasn't credited 🙄 Google Lens search wasn't helpful either. Does anyone know where this is from so I can credit them????? This has got to be one of the most gorgeous pieces of Lukemara fanart I've ever seen 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[movalise]

Mara Jade with strawberry blonde hair and practical clothes

[mariahjade2]

What if like in Andor, Mara is a cop hell bent on finding this murderer but as she tracks him across the galaxy she uncovers more of the mystery and it's not what she bargained for, and he's not what she thought. ;)

[keyfili]

STAR WARS: EPISODE IV - A NEW HOPE / faceless 1977 • dir. George Lucas

[frostbitebakery]

we don’t make promises

we don’t take vows

we have knowledge

and we know that we have each other

[charmwasjess]

I don't think Jocasta Nu gets enough credit for this moment where she purges the entire Jedi Archive data to keep the Empire from being able to access that trove of knowledge for their purposes:

It's just the valor of surviving Order 66, somehow, impossibly getting away, and yet still coming back into her gutted home-turned-tomb to do this excruciating, ultimate act of sacrifice. Destroying this last physical manifestation of her people's culture, identity, and her own life's work. It's such a Jedi moment: letting something deeply important go, not out of apathy or coldness, but to protect others.

Jocasta as a character is so defined by her exchange in AotC, telling Obi-Wan that if something isn't in the Jedi Archives, it doesn't exist. So many fans have interpreted that as to stand for the arrogance of the Jedi, not the pride in her life's work collecting and maintaining a resource as incredible and massive as the Jedi Archives. I think this act is even more powerful answer to those charges; far from Jocasta Nu being a posterchild for the Jedi doggedly clinging to an institution for the sake of itself, she's willing to throw all of that away in an instant if it means one less weapon for the Empire.

[sirgawin]

You’re not the warrior I’ve been looking for.