I'm Nigel Banyai. 38 years old, natural blood-stained blond. If you want 183cm (6ft for you American cunts) of pure Romanian brawn, hit me up. Or if you want a hit of something stronger, I got that too.
…The fuck you mean this isn’t a dating app?
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Status:
Back. No one can kill me in a way I haven’t already died before.
Tags:
#nigel's inbox - Everything where Nigel's speaking
#nigel's lore - Lore/background things
#naughty nigel - Suggestive/18+ content (block this tag if you’re a minor/don’t want that)
#nigel's reblogs - Reblogged posts
#nigel photos - Posts with photos of Nigel
#[Not Nigel] - Anything out of character or with the Admin in it. Words from the Mun will be written in [brackets].
- I’m running on EST, if you’re curious. It might take me a while to get back to you, say up to a week at the latest. I’m a busy man, but I’ll try to tell you beforehand if I’ll be away longer than that. Don’t worry, it takes a lot to kill me, sweetheart. But you’re welcome to miss me when I’m gone. ;)
- Flirt with me, and I’ll fucking flirt with you just as hard if not even harder, darling. In fact, I might initiate if you’re interesting enough. This is your one and only warning, so don’t be surprised if I start teasing. But if that’s not your thing, tell me and I’ll lay off on it. I always appreciate honesty.
- DMs are closed for the most part. Send an ask if you wanna talk, and pick a sign-off if you plan on being a regular.
- Be fucking civil. Your ass is getting blocked if you’re genuinely disrespectful and shit. I shouldn’t have to say this, but knowing how many times I’ve had to beat this information into people, it seems that common decency is something many forget.
- I’m not sure how all this works, to be honest. Go easy on me, yeah?
[Note that Nigel is written by an adult. I don’t write full-on smut, but he gets suggestive/NSFW. Do not engage with him sexually if you’re a minor (he will likely ask anyway) and block the NSFW tag.]
[You are welcome to send out of character asks! Please mark it as such (OOC) or address me directly.]
It has been rather some time since I last made an appearance. My schedule has regrettably become... quite demanding, leaving precious little time to myself recently. Tho I've been curious about what a person such as yourself has been up to since then...
@/antleredfeast
I'm not surprised, given your profession. What has been occupying you instead?
Not much has happened in your absence, if I'm not mistaken. Same old. But you're more than welcome to bum a scroll off my page and see my exploits for yourself.
Sure, we can split 10/90, but I get to make more marketable merch of you + I desperately need a massage. You could just drive your elbow straight into my right shoulder.
- 💾
Deal. I'm good at giving massages. Every muscle in your shoulder will be tenderised after I get my hands on you, believe you me.
Congratulations, it's a tough job to get into. I hear the training is brutal. I'm not particularly fond of feds, but I can respect that much.
Acquaintance? Sure, why not. He doesn't tell me much about his teaching days, so I would love to hear anything and everything about it. Particularly if you have any interesting or funny stories I can hold over his head. Or photos.
Brutal but nothing short of exciting though. I wasn't a big fan of the rigid schedule and the early mornings and the food.. and a few units.. but all that aside, can't complain much when I'm livin' the dream.
Mm hm, I guess you could say I have a few stories here and there, but it seems pretty unprofessional of me to do so! Given your special relationship with Mr. Graham, I'm sure he'll tell you about it in due time. You're very fond of one specific fed haha. I took the liberty of glancing through your page, and I'll say though I am really curious how the two of you ended up together. You're, y'know. Like something I'm 99.99% sure I'll find in our databases.
Screw professionalism. I'm speaking as a mutual acquaintance, nothing more. I doubt you'll get an infraction for reliving your academy days.
You know how the story goes. He stalks me, I stalk him back tenfold, we end up something along the lines of friends, I kidnap him twice, and then I date his pretty ass to get his persistent admirers and therapist off his back. True romance. I'm almost curious to know what you've got on me. I have few ties to the Americas.
What the fuck? Are you the one who's been leaving those fuckin notes for me? I guess it isn't to surprising. I get it. Your an edgy, dark mafia guy and you want me to be scared right now. Your wrong, though. I'm not scared of shit. I could have my guys on you in a second, but maybe you'd fuckin like it.
You’re a detective, and you didn’t figure it out? I even left an initial. Not the brightest of the lot, are you.
I have no reason to scare you unless you actually try to pull something. You’re not worth my time. I was asked a question and answered honestly. Simple as that. Makes sense that you’d have to send your lackeys instead, seeing how I doubt you can take me all by yourself. Not man enough to try, Bronson?
What do you mean you know about sexual reproduction in practice. I thought you didn’t have kids.
Did you know there are very few Y chromosome linked traits in humans, but there are quite a few X-linked traits, one of which can be responsible for color blindness, and the reason color blindness is more prevalent in men is because they only possess one X chromosome and are thus more susceptible to X-linked genetic disorders?
Thank you for the tips, by the way, but I don’t think I’ll be punching much anytime soon.
- 🌙
Practice as in copulation. I almost did have kids. But I'd be a shitty father, and she said with my jealous streak, I would resent the poor thing. Probably isn't wrong.
It seems we have a higher risk of losing the genetic lottery. Sounds about right.
- currently reading: The American Crisis by Thomas Paine
- currently working on: Hanging up decorations for my room
- currently wearing: My "I Put the 'Tism in Patriotism" shirt and jeans
- last google search: England vs Argentina World Cup
- favorite flower: Roses,,, I'm basic sorry
tags: @insanityinablog @sillylo2 @pansyb3lle @yourfriendslushi3 @the-ultimate-kyle @iwillruinyourincarnation (Reblogging with your answers isn't required and I can remove u if u want... ok)
Currently watching: Rewatching Chicago (2002) for Queen Latifah’s beautiful presence. I was making my way through Orange Is the New Black, but I’ve been down in the dumps ever since one of my fav characters died and haven’t been able to get over that.
Current obsession: I mean, it’s always baking and baked goods as one of my obsessions, but currently, bundts!
Currently reading: On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong
Currently working on: my journey to be an attorney :) and pet projects of writing of mine
Currently wearing: purple athletic shorts, strawberry cropped t-shirt.
Last Google search: how do i download chapters in Kortext
Message to 🌙 anon, make bread. Trust me it works so well for getting bigger arms. Kneading bred is a hell of a workout ngl plus it's yummy to eat in the end.
Yeh shark immortal now :D Unless shark get data wiped from Internet qwq Shark never thought about that... o-O
Nigel naturally suspicious but shark get it! uvu Shark thinking shark get into many trouble cause shark too trusting ._. ANYWAY! Shark got no spooky skeleton in closet as hooman say :P Shark just sharking around hehe :3
I’m sure no one would do thag. Seeing how you’ll outlive me, you better light a shit ton of fireworks and explosives in my honour when I die again.
Good to know. Who abused your trust? It’s not inherently bad that you are, it’s only bad that others are willing to take advantage of it.
You wouldn't feel the love if it weren't a little violent I guess. Also, I have to confess One Night in Bangkok has been on my playlist since I listened to it. It's catchy music wise.
Would suggest Cherry Tree by The National, My Favorite Faded Fantasy by Damien Rice and Slipknot's A Liar's Funeral. Very varied musically, I know.
True. What's love without a little suffering? That's how you know it's real.
I'm glad I could infect you with the song. Shit gets stuck in my head all too often.
You enjoy strings and melodic vocals, it seems. These are good recommendations. I'll be listening to The National's discography soon. The crescendo in Rice's one is gorgeous, and you can never go wrong with Slipknot.