Mike Driver
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@365rulesofthenewworld
Rule #281: Sunshine list
Rule #281: Sunshine list
For those who are not aware, the sunshine list is a published list of public-sector workers earning more than $100,000.00annually. Everyone is all up in arms about this right now because the list has grown 11% this year over last. Well what do people expect? It’s called inflation! 100K isn’t that much anymore. Do you want your public servants working for minimum wage? Wouldn’t that be great,…
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Rule #288: Lunch etiquette
Rule #288: Lunch etiquette
Maybe I’m the only one in the world who feels this way, but I can’t stand trying to have lunch with someone who can’t put their damn phone down for 60 seconds! Why, in my day, phones were attached to walls and used when necessary, not obsessively. Like if your house was on fire or you needed a pizza ASAP and didn’t feel like making one. Oh how times have changed! But really, if you’re eating with…
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Rule #289: Honey garlic
Rule #289: Honey garlic
Who thought to put these flavours together? Has anyone ever made a honey and garlic sandwich? No. Why? Because it’s grody to the max! Or so says my smokin’ hot trophy 80’s girlfriend.
I’d rather have peanut butter & cheese. Why can’t I order peanut butter and cheese wings? Or get a rack of peanut butter and cheese ribs? I’ll enter that in the next ribfest!
In the new world, when honey and…
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Rule #301: Snow tires
Rule #301: Snow tires
In a Canadian winter, if you don’t have a kick ass set of all seasons on your car, you need to get snow tires!
Never mind the safety factor, I’m sick of sitting behind the sports car that can’t get up the 1% grade in a half inch of snow because the kid behind the wheel thinks he can get through the winter with his summer slicks on.
In the new world, snow tires will be mandatory north of the 49th…
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Rule #313: Litigation
It’s time to put an end to frivolous litigation cases. We’ve all heard of these. Not the least of which, was that Dick-wad judge who sued his dry cleaner for $65 million for losing his fat ass pants (Pearson vs Chung). I won’t get into the ludicrous details of the case, The point is, the courts never should have given him the time of day.
Then there’s the commercials we see on tv and billboards…
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Rule #361: Gun control
Rule #361: Gun control
This is easy. If it’s sole purpose is to kill another human, it shouldn’t exist. I know the NRA would have you believe that the best defense against a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun, but a better solution is no one with a gun. I think there is some truth to the saying “guns don’t kill people, people kill people”. But until we can fix everyone and rid the world of bad people, we…
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Rule #1: ...
Rule #1: …
How do we create a better world? I have to go back a year and reflect on what brought me here. What is the one way to create a better world? What was it that was driving me so nuts that I had to spend an entire year writing about it? Of course! We have to create better people. I hear other people say it all the time. So we have to ask ourselves, “How do we create better people?” So many of us…
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Rule #2: Keeping an open mind
Rule #2: Keeping an open mind
Wow… rule #2 – he said very soberly - Tomorrow is an iconic day. A great day, in my humble opinion. The last of 365 rulesfor a new, better world will be released. I can’t believe it’s finally here. Over the last 364 days we’ve done a lot. I’d like to think we’ve given some thought to some issues that really require a re-think, introduced a few new rules and maybe even had a laugh or two along the…
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Rule # 3: World governance
Rule # 3: World governance
Why can’t government organizations run as effectively as successful businesses? The world needs to adopt the same business hierarchy that a successful business uses. One leader with many departments. The breakdown happens at the federal level. That’s what’s wrong with the world. You couldn’t run a successful business if every department was permitted to adopt it’s own set of rules independent of…
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Rule #4: Comedy and humor
Rule #4: Comedy and humor
What people find offensive and why is a question that does not have a simple answer. One person’s joke is another person’s rude comment. What some people consider subtle wit is nothing but an insult to someone else. Ultimately, what we have to do is learn to differentiate between
aggressive, hurtful insults and funny jokes made for the purpose of humor. Nothing that is meant as a joke should…
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Rule #5: Child abuse
Rule #5: Child abuse
14 percent of all men and 36 percent of all women in prison were abused as children. I’m not talking about the small tap on the ass used to wake a kid up. I’m not for it and don’t practice it – mostly because my kids are big enough to kick the shit out of me if I was to lay a hand on them. This is about the losers who use their size and / or authority to intimidatea child. There certainly will…
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Rule #6: New Years resolutions
Rule #6: New Years resolutions
This year I’ve made it easy for you. All you have to do is resolve to follow the rules of the New World. No more making up ridiculous resolutions that you’re just going to abandon on January 3rd anyway. No more promising to become the best guitarist in the world just to give it up when you realize it hurts your fingers. Or deciding that this is the day of all days to stamp out that dirty smokingh…
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Rule #7: Flashlights
This is one of those subjects that come to mind when I have nothing better to do than stare blankly at an inanimate object until I’m in a full-blown mental debate with it. So as I’m staring at my flashlight, I ask it, “why are you called a flashlight? You don’t flash and I don’t want you to flash.”As a matter of fact, the only time any of my flashlights have every flashed is when I really needed…
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Rule #8: Sesame seeds
Rule #8: Sesame seeds
There are many things in this world we could really live without, and as I ponder the list of useless things that are more annoying than useful, I’d have to put sesame seeds very near the top of that list. Somewhere between Left turn lollygaggers and greeting cards. Is it even factual to call them seedsat all? Has anyone ever planted one? What would grow? A sesame tree or a sesame flower? All…
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Rule #9: Playing matchmaker
Rule #9: Playing matchmaker
Do you know when is a good time to play matchmaker? Usually never. I would say the only time that hooking people up is appropriate, is if someone actually comes to you and requests to be introduced to someone else you know. Otherwise, it’s best to stay out of it. Although I assume setting friends up with each other is an act that is born out of good intentions, it may not always end in a…
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Rule #10: Wimpy Kids
Rule #10: Wimpy Kids
How did kids get so soft? What was it that began this age of child entitlement and wimpyness? We’ve created a generation of fat kids who can’t go outside or eat nuts and are all ADHDpositive. I’d like to go back in time and present to our forefathers one of their great, great, great fat wimpy grandkids and say, “He’s on meds because he won’t pay attention and can’t eat nuts”. Then I’d stand back…
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Rule #11: Credit and borrowing
Rule #11: Credit and borrowing
Credit cards can be a convenient and economical way to handle daily funds. Used wisely you never have to worry about carrying cash and most cards offer incentives that will get you free shit. But be careful, young ones… take heed. The #1 rule is don’t carry a balance long enough to incur interest. Even before you start using a card for day to day purchases, create a back up plan such as a line of…
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