I'm so two thousand and eight, you're so two thousand and late

I am THE memelord. Bow down plebs. Not only do I have the best sense of internet humor, but I'm also pretty edgy. One time I stayed out past 9, and stared directly into the sun, for 3 minutes, without my hand crafted replica of spy kid Gary Giggle's sunglasses. And yes ladies, I have a British accent, because I watch Doctor Who. I also have an Irish friend, which is pretty close to having a British friend.

[darelcare]

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This is one of the best versions of Reptilia ever honestly

[bannanachip]

Jane’s Aroma

Jane’s favorite season was winter and she only wore light clothes

She washed 3 times a day

At home or away

To clean her foul feet and toes

She bought flowers, glycerine, and oils, of only her favorite scent

To make soaps and perfumes

That masked her toxic fumes

And sold them to pay off her rent

She was looking to date a tall handsome man, who could stop her from feeling so frantic

She talked well on the phone

But men left her alone

Because just a spill on her shirt and shed panic

“Let me take you out to a little place I know, It’s Italian,” is what Tony said

She lotioned her neck and face

Then walked to the place

But was greeted with garlic bread

“Um, I can’t eat that,” she said as an excuse, “its not apart of my diet”

“I’ll take a salad, please”

But it was arugula and blue cheese

And she had already made Tony buy it

She removed her fleece, and wiped her brow, as she felt herself work up a sweat

It was not her intention

To create this first impression

Smelling of B.O. around this man she just met

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I can’t stand this anymore. Just tell me already I stink!”

She stood up from her chair

Screaming, choking on air

Leaving Tony hardly able to think

He was bad around women, he couldn’t hold a fork, and yes, he was far from perfection

But still in his seat

His words made her heart skip a beat

“Calm down Jane, I have a sinus infection.”

[thunderstruck9]

René Magritte (Belgian, 1898-1967), Le pain quotidien [Daily Bread], 1942. Oil on canvas, 91.6 x 69.8 cm.

[420smoken00bzevryday]

Check out my depop 🧚‍♀️

[predawnchloroform]

[unclefather]

[cigarettesforcats]

i keep getting advertisements about hot sexy milfs in my area 

[candyredterezii]

turn on your location OP

[cigarettesforcats]

[candyredterezii]

[transtarks]

mike’s hard almond milk

[wierdautumn]

cum

[transtarks]

every day i live in regret

[fire-withi-n]

[14bux]

This is what the Sims see

[chromolume]

buses are so iconic they’re like “this little number tells you where I’m going hop on if you want idc” and everyone at the bus stop is like “wig”

[dogls]

were really running out of posts to make huh

[unclefather]

[prisonhannibal]

All of you straight people asking how you can support gays this pride month smh like the answer is so easy.. whenever you see a gay person you have to give them all your fucking weed

[statsdead-deactivated20200602]

just bought this tapeworm from etsy!

[3828281493392929-deactivated201]

where are you gonna keep it

[statsdead-deactivated20200602]

:)

[ginger-ale-official]

I don’t like this post very much

[fungoidz-deactivated20200705]

animal named squarsh

[jiluan-deactivated20171207]

im gonna tuch it

[personsonable-deactivated201908]

what u doin 2 me……………………………………………………………

[wokeuplaughing]

hey guys reminder to not make “feral” jokes because se hjsh skjdjksj jsdjdh jj jhjhfhjs hhsu iuehsjd mbns hsdkjwbnjk oiasioi ajshjdsaj bjfkdjfbgjkahw hahsh shsh hhskshf aadas hfhfhasgdagsd ddd hdhs qjjq kjqwjk bhassakjafb 

[thewritingrealm]

If you're reading this...

go write three sentences on your current writing project.

[ezzydean]

# my favourite part about this post # is that nowhere does it say to reblog this # but we’re all reblogging it # because if we have to suffer # so do other writers

[bitegore]

F u c k

[banshees-deactivated20180812]

its human nature to want a bunch of small jars