Moments in which Adam Smasher has you convinced he's a cat in... borg form:
Demanding your attention while simultaneously giving non-verbal cues that he does not need your attention. Or something like that.
Appearing by your side at the most inopportune moments. For you, that is.
Double points if, after randomly appearing, Smasher also proceeds to ignore everything. You included. While never straying too far from you. Uh...?
Which leads us to the most egregious accusation on the list: Smasher is a prime example of the cat borg distribution system remaining undefeated because what the fuck do you mean he just showed up in your office space, parked his ass on your new sofa, dented said sofa, and now you can't rid of him even if you tried?
Input from others suggesting you accept your fate and adopt him use Smasher's interest in you to move up the ranks.
Leaving a trail of destruction wherever he goes and sitting serenely in the chaos. Case in point: you stepped out of your office once and came back to Smasher sitting right where you left him on the couch... with some of your decor strewn about and broken. What the fuck? You later find out that he targeted objects he specifically did not like in your office. That you decorated. Keyword: YOU.
In the moments where you do, uh, voluntarily make the first move and shower him with attention, it's solely dedicated to rubbing that big chrome dome of his, which, admittedly, took some time. And courage. In the early stages of the cat borg distribution system, you had the bright idea to touch the top of his head because Adam Smasher is in your fucking office. And what did Adam Smasher do? ...Nothing, actually. And by nothing, he just turned his head to look at you, you jumped and were scared shitless, and didn't even dare entertain the thought again for the next couple of months.
And now? He actually doesn't do anything. Except let out this soft, mechanical... hum? When you stop, he'll stop humming. And turn to look at you because why'd you stop, meat?
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