This past year has been such a wild combination of opportunities, personal development, and professional development, as well as finding out more about myself and who I am. Let's begin shall we?
My year started off with me continuing to work overnights in retail. I had taken an online grocery picker job back in mid-2020 to just start earning some sort of income and opportunities in teaching were surprisingly few and far in between for that solid 2 years I worked there doing this kind of work. It was an okay job, but I missed out on so much working overnights- I was not able to keep up with current events, could not make plans with people, and just had to basically survive in that role instead of enjoying it. Fortunately, I would leave this role this year- thank goodness for that too because I was not sure how much longer I could handle such a job any longer than I did.
It's funny because I knew I would be leaving this role or doing this role in a smaller capacity as early as November of 2021 because I had been accepted into my school board- it was just a delayed start date by months due to constant chasing of paperwork from previous teaching opportunities both in my current city and in the UK. I finally got word in March of this year that I can start to substitute teach in April. That word and news finally was what I needed to change my overnight availability to just weekends, then spend the rest of my week doing my best to accept whatever substitute role and job was available on their platform. It was a welcomed change, but definitely an exhausting adjustment when I started the 2nd/3rd week of April- why did I start so late one might ask? Well, I had a vacation planned that was another amazing highlight to my year.
In early April-ish, my dear friend Darryl, after a long 7.5 year friendship, finally was able to safely travel up to my part of Canada from California. It was so so so fucking amazing to see him again as it had been a long time since I went to California for a long 2 week adventure back in 2015- long overdue to finally see the bestie again. We went all over my city in the 3-4 days he was here for- from seeing his reactions to poutines, Tim Hortons, and how my city had some surprising unique buildings, structures, and even venues to go visit. He had heard about these places all the time from me over the years, but to see him take it all in, in person, with him beside me? So incredibly special. I was an emotional mess for a week after he left; but I know he is going to be coming back to my city this year most likely for a convention I will be talking about later on in my year: Animethon.
Substituting then started shortly after he had to leave and it was wild jumping back into the classroom again, in person, not online. At this point, most people had stopped wearing masks as the government dropped the mandate due to insane protests for months on end. It was terrifying being there and still to this day, I am constantly aware of students and staff in schools I go too working while sick and have to be diligent and safe myself while others have stopped caring or cannot be safe any more...it is a heavy feeling, but nonetheless I made many connections immediately upon substituting, especially at my old high school oddly enough. I had been to a few schools downtown in my city, but it was near the end of April I went back to my old high school twice for social studies cover, and then near the beginning of May, I went back a third time to cover Spanish- an whole long story in itself as another opportunity came my way from accepting that first, one day job.
Taking that Spanish cover job would lead to a long series of insanely amazing, yet stressful events. During my first day covering for the teacher, she reached out to me to ask if I could come back the following day, potentially two days. I said yes because the more you cover for a teacher, the more pay you get in my school board so I was like, sweet- yes please! Cue the next day and again, the teacher asked if I could stay the rest of the week and potentially Monday as well- shortly after that, the department head came and spoke to me seeing if I would be interested in remaining covering for this teacher for two weeks as the teacher needed more time away. I said yes, I would need resources and some help adjusting, but sure. It's an amazing opportunity, why would I turn this down? On the third day of covering for this teacher, after some observations from the department head, I was asked to come see her after the work day was done. it was that meeting that she offered me my temporary contract to remain teaching Spanish full time until the end of the school year- a 7 week temp contract that would change my life so much. It led for me to quit my overnight job on the spot that Friday night, left me scrambling to lesson plan, get resources and guidance from all kinds of people like my department head, the teacher I took over for a bit, and even my old Spanish teacher that taught me at that very high school I was now teaching at. I worked 7:30am - 5pm most week days, and worked those similar hours on the weekends at times as well as I took over everything; lesson planning, teaching, marking, assessing, etc. It was a lot and most days I felt the weight of it all, never took lunch breaks, and just kept going and going and going until the exam break hit and I could breathe a bit. My biggest win from that experience was connecting with the students to receive the kindest of emails and cards at the end of the period, and even one student thanked me so profusely for working with her to bring her mark up 30% to pass the class and move on to grade 12 this year. It was a whirlwind of stress and fear that I was failing these kids by jumping in so late and not sorting myself out right away, but in the end I did not fail them, they got to know me and i got to know them, and I gave these students opportunities to improve their marks after an awful first 2/3 of a semester with constant substitute teachers who did not know the language. We managed and got through it together; to everyone's relief. Whenever I do go back to my old high school as a substitute again, I still have some of those previous students stop by if they see me in a classroom or even ask how I am doing if I am teaching them that day. I would call that a successful experience with that reception I get going back there to this day.
Another highlight to this year was actually coming out as demisexual and pansexual. I was questioning my identity a lot during the pandemic as many failed dates and people pushing physical acts on me left me so uncomfortable I felt broken and wrong. Why wasn't this working? Why was I failing at dating and finding the wrong people? Was it because I refused to put labels on myself as a stubborn person who originally thought labels would limit myself and my experiences to what those labels were only? It was a lot of those thoughts that led me to talk to new friends and explore so many websites that shared so many positive ace experiences with great break downs of everything under that identity. In May, everything I read and experienced and talked to people about just clicked and ta-da! I am demi, I am pan, and I am so happy to be both. My first Pride ever was my first out Pride and despite knowing the stereotypes people had about ace people in the 2SLGBTQIA+ community, I felt so incredibly accepted, welcomed, and celebrated in June I still get a little emotional about this to this day. Now my family do not understand or even want to know more about this part of me, so that was a bit weird to like be out, be proud, but had people ignore me that were supposed to be my loved ones and such, but honestly? Fuck them. I know who I am and do not need approval from people who are not invested in my life any more.
It was also around this May/June period I entered a mentorship program that featured all mentors from the 2SLGBTQIA+ community. I was amazed at all I had done leading up to June, but I as confused about what I should do next; do I continue to try to grow my community on Outschool and be an online teacher? Do I look for more permanent, stable work? What about the queer community and where do I or could I fit in? I met so many amazing potential mentors, but Josh was phenomenal. He had me share about my passions in that first meeting and found things for me to do to work on immediately; create business cards for substituting and my queer D&D classes on Outschool, join local queer FB groups and events, and make some new connections in my community. I worked so hard on all of these things and my August was so successful with gaining more students, going to variety of events, and planting some seeds for connections to continue to grow what I was doing- showing how inclusivity can be accessed in such fun, creative, and personal development ways. It was working, but now what? September started and things slowed down immensely Outschool wise. The second meeting led for us to discuss making a business profile of all the classes I offered as well as workshops I could offer using this inclusive lens in gaming, as well as reaching out directly to local organizations such as the Pride Centre here in my city. Receiving the next steps and reflecting on how much my work meant to me, I had the confidence to start doing these bigger things that led for me to receive paid opportunities to teach Queer D&D sessions at the Pride Centre! Those went so well and bringing in the fun, quirky, and respected queer NPCs I had developed for my students led to amazing success. 2023 they want me back fairly regularly and we will be sorting out a contract on that in the New Year! I have also been asked to work on ensuring curriculum is inclusive in both Toastmasters and in another opportunity I will be talking about a bit further down. Not only did I find myself as a queer person, I found my community, and I am helping to ensure these communities are well respected and represented in every aspect of gaming and education. What a year! Thank you Josh, you were the greatest mentor I could have ever had this year.
Now back to the summer a bit- not only did I attend Pride, but I volunteered and attended so many other events. I volunteered at Pride where those connections first began and started. Also, I volunteered at the Heritage Festival in my city that brings so many people and cultures together in a large park outdoors where over a 130 countries had pavilions/tents selling food and so many amazing other things they could share about their culture. It was hot, it stormed, but I enjoyed helping people find the tents they wanted to go too and learning so much about different cultures there as a volunteer- the best way to travel to a country without actually going there. Worth the sunburns and rain soaked clothes that weekend. I also attended a TikTok Marketing Conference that summer as well- which was valuable and insightful as taking on a new Public Relations role in Toastmasters for my one club. Learning the peak times to post clips, what tags to include, how many times to post any content in a week would lead to the amazing success of ExtraLife this year (see my last post for more details). While I may not use TikTok that often any more- I can see the value of it and hope to explore more in the New Year after that event. I then attended Animethon and it was amazing- the cosplays I saw and took photos of, the people I met, the artists I adored and their work, plus discovering new shows and characters made that event amazing for me. I also recognized that going to an event like that by yourself is very difficult- surrounded by people, being pushed around, feeling lost, and the anxiety of, again, many people unmasked, left me having a few anxiety attacks that con, but at least there were quiet anime viewing rooms where I discovered SpyxFamily and Scarlet Nexus- my two favourites of the year. Hence why, hopefully, Darryl can come to Animethon 2023 with me so that won't happen again. Last but not least, I then attended and volunteered at my city's Fringe Festival. It was an 11 day festival with so many different plays, shows, acts, and more. I volunteered for 4 days, but also went for an additional 4 days to support so amazing acts such as yegDND, Iago vs. Hamlet, Mark of the Minotaur, Queer History: A Queer Musical, Undead Newlyweds, Mi Habana Querida, and many many more shows. Being an Ambassador, it was almost expected for us to go to as many shows as possible so we could hype up local and international acts, help people find venues, and hand out little stickers that made both kids and adults so excited- a beautifully busy event but I so so so enjoyed it, every moment and every show.
The next big opportunity that came my way in 2022 was becoming a Public Speaking Coach for a start up company called TalkMaze! It started out as teaching only one group class every Monday evening, to then teaching two students 1-1, and as of this past month, being promoted to being a Coach Coordinator for the company that has so many aspects to the role on top of continuing to teach public speaking and confidence as well. The goal of this company is to help youth develop a sense of self-confidence through public speaking, debate, and eventually through model UN as well. I currently am working on the public speaking and speech classes to help these students achieve this goal, but my more recent role is also becoming very valuable as well. As the Coaching Coordinator, I am currently developing and revamping the 1-1 Program curriculum to ensure that every lesson does add value to the student in regards to building communication and public speaking skills, as well as developing their sense of self-confidence. When this development and revamping is finished in a few months from now, I will also be helping to hire new coaches, train them, develop SOPs for their various roles, and even provide feedback to the coaches on how well their lessons are going as I get to observe them as well. Such a valuable role and if I continue to do well, there is a chance to jump to full time and lead the entire Education side to the company- a goal to achieve in 2023!
2022 has given me so much in so many unexpected ways; from finding my confidence in teaching again and leaving a toxic overnight work environment, to even finding myself and creating a safe community for myself as demisexual and pansexual, to so many opportunities in teaching D&D, teaching public speaking, and now developing curriculum that gives me so much meaning and purpose in my life, to also hitting an amazing fundraising goal for ExtraLife 2022.
What does 2023 look like for me?
Hopefully working hard and becoming that Education lead for TalkMaze, travel at least once this year somewhere again as I miss traveling a LOT, have Darryl come visit me for Animethon, continue to offer inclusive gaming and education workshops in various capacities, fundraise $1250 USD for ExtraLife, and make so many new friends. I want to do so much with my life, and if I do not aim high? I will get stuck, and what fun is getting stuck when I now know how much I can offer to the world, and how genuinely proud of myself I am. Hopefully you all will be here with me during this journey and I cannot wait to see where 2023 will take all of us.
Happy New Year everyone and stay golden~
PS. Toastmasters reflection will come in June of 2023 as Toastmasters goes from July-June year wise! Stay tuned~
