by Morgan Jai
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
i don't do bad sauce passes

JBB: An Artblog!
Claire Keane
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Game of Thrones Daily
styofa doing anything

No title available
$LAYYYTER

★

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
noise dept.
almost home
Three Goblin Art
trying on a metaphor
todays bird
dirt enthusiast
🪼
cherry valley forever

seen from Singapore

seen from United States
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seen from Malaysia

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Singapore

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seen from Sweden

seen from United States
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seen from United Kingdom
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@abbeyes
by Morgan Jai
A once-in-a-lifetime shot — the moon perfectly framed by a rainbow. Caught at just the right time. 🌈 🌕
Let's talk about this scene !!!
Earlier that night, Kevin got mad at Andrew for saying yes to Wymack but not him about actually trying during the game.
Andrew has told Kevin no many times about this particular subject, and when Kevin wants more from Andrew than Andrew is willing to give, Andrew gets triggered.
He has a past history of saying no and being ignored. Being taken advantage of anyway. His lack of consent was never respected and he was awfully traumatized.
When Kevin pushes him before the game, he resorts to violence to keep his boundary in place. But it still triggers him.
He knows that after watching him play as well as he did in the game, Kevin will only want more from him and therefore will try even harder to push him to say yes and he knows this will trigger him even more.
He is telling Kevin no for his own health and safety, because he is waiting to say yes until it's something he actually wants for himself and not just giving in to Kevin's desires. But obviously Kevin doesn't understand this and keeps trying to wear him down, which takes a toll on Andrew's mental health.
So where does he go to feel safe and to feel like he actually has a choice? Wymack's apartment. Because Wymack always gives him a choice and has more invested in his wellbeing than his talent and exy career.
Ugh i could cry.
Andrew and the word no.
Andrew's trauma heavily involved the (fucked up) wants/desires of others outranking his no.
He loves saying no to people now because he can. He didn't have knives and physical strength before to enforce it but he does now.
He gets triggered when people try to push him into things because he feels like his no won't be respected, so when he notices someone wanting or expecting *anything at all* from him, he immediately shuts down and says no. And if they push him on it, he gets violent.
He even makes deals with people to create clear boundaries that can't be easily pushed.
He says it's so much fun to say no, but it's really self-protection.
Enter Neil, Mr. "I asked"
Who respects every boundary and every no that Andrew says.
Who reads between the lines and sees it clear as day.
Who never allows his wants or desires to be more important than Andrew's consent.
Even though the rest of the foxes call Andrew crazy, he has helped every single person on the team become better versions of themselves and he gets no credit for that !!!!!!!
The upperclassmen (except Renee) don't even try to understand him but he understands all of them and usually helps and supports them when given the opportunity.
He helps Renee acknowledge her past self instead of being in denial of it. He helps Matt fight his drug problem head on and kick it for good instead of hiding and scraping by. He supports Allison in coming back so soon even when nobody else thinks she's ready to play yet after Seth. Etc etc etc.
He doesn't connect to them in simple or arbitrary ways but he can relate to their pain and trauma because he has had so much of it in his life and he helps them learn the lessons he had to learn on his own. He empowers the foxes to become better versions of themselves and he gets no acknowledgment! At all!!!!!
Nobody but Neil even notices when he's scared of heights on the plane for fucks sake!
So does anyone else think that in tfc, Andrew punched the window in his room after coming back from the Kathy show not bc of the Riko/Kevin stuff but because of the way he feels for Neil?
Like-he literally puts himself between Riko and Neil and then immediately walks past Neil and "He touched Neil's back on his way by, fingers light enough to give Neil goose bumps, but didn't slow on his way to Kevin's side"
I just imagine him back at the dorm trying to be there for Kevin and be Protective Andrew and all he can think about is Neil shit-talking Riko to his face and how it turned him on.
Why else would he punch a window? It was probably the same hand he touched Neil with and he couldn't bear the thought of Feeling Things for Neil and he needed immediate violence towards himself to shove it down just like he always does
Been getting really into orange juice lately
#myjuice
Aftg thoughts after rereading yet again pt 3:
Neil spends so much time wondering how Andrew could ever think he could stand between Neil/Kevin and the Moriyamas when he knows what they are capable of. Andrew's love language is protection AT THE EXPENSE OF HIS LIFE AND WELL-BEING. He doesn't care about his life and genuinely would go so far as to die for those in his inner circle because his life doesn't mean anything more than protection for others to him. Cough cough Aaron. Cough cough Nicky.
Insert Neil and his "if im hiding behind you im still running" bitch ass who shows Andrew that he can be WANTED not just NEEDED.
Yes Andrew falls apart when Neil goes missing, yes he would give his life to make sure Neil is okay, but Neil WILL NOT allow himself to be more important to Andrew than Andrew's own life and well-being. And he knows this when he talks Andrew into letting him out of his deal.
Neil wonders why Kevin thinks Andrew is enough to protect him from the big bad Moriyamas when Andrew is just a short goalie with anger issues but KEVIN HAS BROTHER ISSUES AND BEING LOVED AND PROTECTED BY A BROTHER FEELS LIKE BEING A POSSESSION TO HIM BECAUSE HE'S TRAUMATIZED AND ANDREW KNOWS THIS SO HE MAKES KEVIN FEEL LIKE THAT'S ALL IT IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS THAT'S ALL KEVIN CAN HANDLE BUT HE ALSO LETS KEVIN HELP HIM AND GIVES KEVIN THE RECIPROCITY THAT A MUTUALLY CARING RELATIONSHIP IS ALL ABOUT.
Aftg thoughts after rereading yet again pt 2:
After Kathy's show and the confrontation backstage, Kevin runs straight to Abby and is embraced/comforted by her. A full on panicked tall ass muscular athlete holding onto little Abby for dear life in front of anyone and everyone that would see them.
Kevin who lost his mom and never had another loving parent after that, who knew only cruelty and ownership from the moriyamas, who couldn't even grieve the loss of his only parent.
Despite Abby and Wymack's relationship not even being official and nobody else knowing Wymack is actually his father, Kevin already wholeheartedly accepts Abby as his mother😭😭😭
Aftg thoughts after rereading yet again pt 1:
---When Kevin first starts bringing Neil to the court at night to learn Raven drills, he refers to the Ravens as "our" line and he says "the master"--- after reading tsc and seeing Jean constantly being corrected by his teammates for saying these things too, we get to see how escaping The Cult affects them similarly and differently, and we see how the "fractured isolationists" aka the foxes deal with that by giving Kevin his privacy and are very hands off with him and his panic attacks--usually leaving him to Andrew/ Wymack and Abby's care
Kevin and Jean both still feel like Ravens inside and feeling like a Raven is still central to their identity for MOST of the time we spend with them. It's just more subtle with Kevin until we see Jean's pov
For Kevin- healing is dealing with his issues privately bit by bit until he has the courage to do it loud and proud. If he is pushed before he is ready he will implode. We see this with his tattoo.
For Jean-healing is his teammates learning every little fucked up thing and then teaching him how things actually should be for him and holding him accountable to heal and change his learned behavior.
If Kevin is pushed, he will implode. If Jean is not pushed, he will never heal.
Kevin KNOWS that Jean will not want to rely on adult/parental figures (Abby, Wymack, Betsy) and that he will rely on teammate influence heavily and thats why he sends him to usc. Kevin has far more emotional intelligence than he pretends to have for those that he cares about.
by neil macc
they should make a sleep that feels like you’ve slept
Reading is political and it always has been. Here are some of the classic books on the banned list that you should definitely check out.