The other Upper Moons didn’t understand it? Rui can get their thought process, he thinks; it was so drilled into their heads that any level of cooperation was just impossible, that demons would inevitably tear themselves apart. And Rui was one of those, wasn’t he? If anyone so much as stepped slightly outside of the arbitrary, ever-changing line that he had set up without rhyme or reason, he’d destroy them. He knew from how his family had looked at him that it wasn’t the same as Daki and Gyuutarou, even if they did work together as a family to some extent.
Rui hangs his head slightly, trying to duck away from Gyuutarou’s gaze. He understands it and he understands how the two of them would be stronger together, but even the slightest implication that Rui’s family and Daki and Gyuutarou’s bond might be the same has made him too uncomfortable.
“He’s been here,” he admits after a pause. “He wasn’t… happy with me for failing.”
What an understatement. Rui’s hand raises to rest gently against the skin underneath his left eye.
“But,” Rui continues, “he left. And… there had been others. Kokushibou-san – ah…” That’s too casual. “… Upper Moon One, he was here. And there were no issues. He even gave me a gift, once. Without Muzan-sama, we… we’re happier. All of us have been happier, no matter how briefly we’ve been here, I think.”
Except his own family. Rui opts to not comment on that. His fake mother and sister would probably prefer he mention them as little as possible. It hurts to admit that, and it hurts to admit that Muzan was never anything to them but someone who instilled such fear in their hearts that they lost their own purposes. Rui catches himself starting to doubt Muzan and instinctively shoves those thoughts aside again, too.
No more talk of his family and no more talk of Muzan.
–it takes a lot more to not jump when Gyuutarou puts his hand on Rui’s shoulder than he cares to admit. It’s embarrassing how skittish he can be, here. He wishes he weren’t.
“I still don’t think–” No, if he insists that Gyuutarou doesn’t owe him one at all he’ll probably have Daki angrily messaging him later about how he ‘shouldn’t take Onii-chan for granted’. Rui shakes his head and fixes his response into an awkward, “… alright.”
He doesn’t mean to just stand there, lingering. It would have been easy enough to just turn and leave, but Rui stays standing there lost in thought for a moment, only drawn out of them when Gyuutarou speaks up again.
“I – don’t eat as much. Anymore. Not any more than I have to. And I’m not very hungry right now.” But he lifts his hands, his threads appearing sharp between his fingers. “–but if you think you might need it, I–” There’s no polite way of saying ‘I know how useless we are when we first arrive here, so I’m probably better off than you are’, so he surprisingly just doesn’t. “–I could tag along.”
That’s a chilling idea, that that man might’ve been in this city at some point. It’s hard to articulate what Gyuutarou really feels about him; respect, awe, some kind of fear, maybe a touch of resentment. He seemed fond of Daki though, and as long as she was happy, so was he. Kept them on his good side.
“Probably better this way,” he mutters. “For everyone. Can’t imagine he’d be happy here.”
Even Number One had relaxed in this city? Gyuutarou had only met him once or twice, and he’d never seen that guy show any emotion at all. Was it really all Muzan’s influence that did this to them? Kept everything repressed out of fear that it could be taken away from you because you pissed someone off? It wasn’t something he thought about; he didn’t really care. So long as he could keep doing what he liked he didn’t really care.
He doesn’t follow up that thought.
Gyuutarou scratches a long gash into his chest to collect his thoughts. Gives him something to focus on, something that’s concrete. He’s not good at getting philosophical. He snickers a little at Rui’s comment, leering down at the kid. “C’mon, you know how many Pillars I’ve killed? I can take a regular human no problem. Doesn’t matter if they take things from me, they can’t take away me. You get it?”
Still, he wouldn’t mind some real weapons, he thinks as the light catches Rui’s threads. Even something made of metal would beat these crappy wooden sickles they gave him. At least he still has his claws. They should be enough.
He turns back towards the district, scratching at his neck again. “Don’t do shit because you think I want it. Good way to get people taking advantage of you.”
He cracks a grin at Rui as he steps forward into the fog. “But if Daki’s taken a liking to you, I’ll indulge her, man. Besides, she’ll get all pissy at me if I just ignore you.” Gyuutarou taps at his his temple, still grinning. “Remember what I said? Stronger together.”