[hosenklapse]

[elplatanotaino]

[klaasfoto]

Hide and seek 2019.

After playing hide and seek with cows for three years (one, two, three) I’ve come to accept that they will never outgrow the level of three year old children. I have to pretend I don’t see them and call out ‘Where oh where could she be?’. Then they half leave their hideout and shout ‘I am here!’, and I still have to act like I really can’t find them. The following bursts of laughter never get old.

[art]

Photographer: Klaas Zwijnenburg

[iwannabeyourhoney]

Awww

[infpisme]

[jenndoesnotcare]

I just left my husband alone with our two children for sixteen days. I was not worried about anything regarding the house, their food, or their wellbeing. I put all the appointments in the family calendar and my husband checked it and kept them. I literally did not worry about them. I missed them, and I was sad that they missed me, but I didn’t worry about them AT ALL. I need to impress upon you all that I missed their company, but was not worried for their welfare.

I also did no meal prep. I don’t even think I went shopping right before I left.

This is not about apples and oranges. This isn’t even about my husband. This is about the fact that this is apparently WEIRD.

Another mum at my daughter’s school is leaving for ten days. She’s taking her youngest (who is a very small baby) and leaving her husband with their two girls. She has been cooking for days preparing freezer meals. She’s panicking and deputizing her six year old to remind him how to make school lunches. AND I AM APPALLED.

A) He is definitely not helpless. (He’s a doctor or something.) What gendered bullshit. B) THAT LITTLE GIRL IS NOT OLD ENOUGH TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR HER AND HER SISTER’S WELLBEING. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. C) Why is she married to this person and creating children with him if he’s this big of an idiot?

While she was laughingly recounting this, the other mums were nodding and smiling sympathetically, like oh yes, I too have my caveman at home!! Such managing required! I was the only one who was like “Dude, he’ll be fine. Literally. He will be fine.” I said it a lot. She was not convinced. She kept bringing up her older daughter. She’ll be like a little mum!

NO.

NO NO NO NO.

NO.

Straight women, don’t do this shit. It’s gross. Don’t infantilize your husbands and then expect your daughters to pick up the slack. So fucking gross. So. So. GROSS.

[fozmeadows]

The fact that so many adults think a six year old girl is more capable of learning and performing basic domestic tasks than a grown-ass man says it all, really. 

[trashcanbees-deactivated2019120]

You should never have children with someone you cannot comfortably, and without a second thought, leave in charge of your kids. People are wild.

[m4a1-shermayne]

Imagine showing this video to someone 6 months ago

[m4a1-shermayne]

Imagine showing this video to someone 1 year ago

[iwontbelookingdown]

oh my god.

[hopefulartandwriting]

This would literally be a closing shot in Black Mirror

[davidmuhn-deactivated20180520]

[r0llingst0ners]

hold my hand randomly, all the time. pull me close. hold me from behind. kiss me constantly. get jealous when someone stares. be clingy on me. take pictures of me when I don’t notice. show me you care. show everyone you care. just care.

[falsescarletwitch-deactivated20]

If someone could kiss me exactly like this, you’d own me.

[anametodefineme-blog]

I’m gonna need someone to kiss like this

[falsescarletwitch-deactivated20]

@toldthatdevil *coughs*

[siickangel]

La Dispute // All Our Bruised Bodies And The Whole Heart Shrinks

[functioning-minne-holic]

I just wanna choke you and slip my fingers into your panties while we snuggle so I can listen to your desperate whimpers

[wrook]

All I’m saying is…body hair on women is divinely sexy

[iits-all-about-lovee]

I can’t stop thinking about kissing you btw

[potatoandotherwise-deactivated2]

turn ons:

telling me how good I taste/feel/etc.

telling me how badly you want me

subtle, little hints that you want me as badly as I want you

sporadic moaning and uneven breathing

scratching/hair pulling

gently dragging your fingernails across my skin

looking into my eyes and begging

pinning me down by my wrists or hips

[thesoftestsensation-deactivated]

I wanna make out so bad right now. Nice and slow. Soft moans. Fingers slipping underneath shirts and waistbands. That kind of making out that build slowly. Hitched breathes and your hips rocking against my thigh. Open mouthed gasps against your neck and fingers tight in my hair. Firm thighs and rough denim and soaked cotten pressing into you. Too many clothes but it feels so good. I just want to make you feel good.

[childhoodruiner]

[partialbirthabortion]

a genuine privilege of being a woman who has sex with other women is understanding the way a healthy and loving partner ACTUALLY looks at you during sex. it’s not “I put up with these lumps and lines because I have to, because everyone has them” or “yeah I know these flaws are there but in the heat of the moment I’m not thinking about them” it’s “GOD look at the way your body moves!” and “wow, I can’t believe how good you feel, smell, sound!” Its not that I /tolerate/ the women I sleep with having bodies that look like bodies; I’m actively attracted to it. I desire women’s bodies because I’m a woman sexually attracted to women and that’s how women look. Sexuality existed a long long time before photoshop did.