the cataclysmic

Adrian Solano.Your worst fuckin' nightmare.

[adriansolano]

* * *

They all played the same game. It was business, really. This was something that he found his competition had a hard time understanding. It was easy for Roman to separate the two - what was a personal attack and what was a business attack. His sister’s life had been hung in the balance and ultimately it was a death that Roman did not let go of so easily. It was the only time he did not find that line so easy to untangle. Roman did not shy away from it, and instead looked Adrian in the eyes when he spoke, “Best case scenario my sister is kept somewhere in a cage, and worst case scenario her soul is wandering without her last Sacrament - I’m sure you can empathize with what those two truths might mean.” Roman never shied away from the topic, his sister was missing and with her absence there was a noticeable difference in Roman. “The lack of leads means it is likely the latter, and likely by someone specialized enough to make sure there are no… squeaky wheels.” He was upfront with the knowledge, after all it didn’t take a rocket scientist to get there, and he knew that Adrian had enough of his own mess to deal with that he wasn’t going to paddyfoot around in his.

Adrian raised a brow as Roman went through his theories. In his mind, his sister was either dead or tortured. Maybe Adrian was bitter, but he couldn’t help but think of a third option. “Maybe she just fucking left,” he said, monotone with a shrug. Though, what did he know? “Regardless, hope you find her.” The sentiment was genuine. Thinking of his own sister, he couldn’t imagine what he’d do if one day Lillian just wasn’t there, unexplained. He’d probably set the city on fire looking for her. 

[cinemagal]

CRAZY STUPID LOVE (2011) dir. Glenn Ficarra & John Requa

[adriansolano]

* * *

Adrian had less to worry about that he knew, if Roman was honest. The Solano’s had been too busy stewing in their own inner turmoil to be preyed upon by the Ross’s which is exactly how Roman saw it. Perhaps that was because the Solano’s had a lot more power and were more stable that Adrian was less than threatened by their mere existence. A little known fact about Roman was that he believed that there was more than enough real estate and money in this city to go around. That each of them could live completely untouched profit wise without having to fuck with each other. “I admire her work ethic. Death is difficult and grieving doesn’t always take the path that others expect from you. She is a good woman, the world would do better with more of her in it.” He looked up from a price tag on a bar cart he was considering. It wasn’t exactly what he wanted and wasn’t in the price range to make it worth the compromise. Roman smiled at the question. “Matteo. He’s growing strong. I hope to leave him a legacy that is better than one I grew up with. And yours? You have a daughter, yes?”

Adrian watched as Roman checked out prices on items, finished with shopping himself; much faster than he originally anticipated. Adrian took the words he spoke about his mother with a grain of salt, unable to trust the man at his word. Though, he’d be sure to pass the sentiment along. I hope to leave him a legacy that is better than one I grew up with, Roman said about his nephew and Adrian nodded in understanding. He wanted the same for Sylvia though now he was sure he failed, having her grow up in a broken home. It was his fault he tore his family apart. “Sylv’s a little genius, like her mother,” he said, though he quickly moved on from the touchy subject of his daughter, to the more touchy subject of Roman’s sister. Adrian heard about her disappearance; couldn’t be easy, not having answers. “Your sister, Isla. Any word on her whereabouts? Leads?” he asked, leaning against the counter.

[adriansolano]

If anything, the change of topic made their conversation even gloomier. Which was frustrating to Lila. An almost aggravated breath left her lips as she leaned in, her expression softening as she looked at him. “What about you, big brother? What do you want?” Their entire conversation revolved around Caroline and Lila didn’t mind talking about their mother per say, but she had a feeling she was talking to a ghost, not the one person she’d loved and admired all her life. However, it made sense Adrian’s personal plans depended on Lissa– little Sylv, to be more exact. “Yeah,” she  breathed out, leaning back and absent-mindedly running fingers through her hair. “She’s–” her voice cut off as she mentally slapped herself. It suddenly hit her she wasn’t allowed to discuss Lissa as freely or reveal her plans to Adrian anymore. And whose fault was that? For some reason her gaze once again found her brother.

What did Adrian want? He wanted to go back in time and tell his father no. Save himself from making the mistake that ruined him, turned him into this self-destructive cataclysmic mess of a man. No Christmas miracle could make that happen, it was an impossibility. He shrugged. “Just want to make mom happy,” he replied. Adrian didn’t have much of a right to ask for more; couldn’t force Lissa to show up for Christmas dinner with their daughter. Lila, however, seemed to know more about his ex’s plans than she was willing to let on. “She’s what?” he pressed. He hadn’t talked to Lissa in some time, other than orchestrating time with Sylvie. Adrian was curious to say the least. “Talk to her recently?”

[adriansolano]

* * *

He was shopping for Caroline, then, Roman thought idly. There were few others that would appreciate such a lamp in Adrian’s life, from what Roman surmised. He wasn’t surprised by the presence of the other boss. There was little that surprised him in the wake of the revelation of his sister’s truth. He let out a chuckle, they both knew there was no money in the game of running a shop like this, and both men had expensive taste. “We all need hobbies, they keep us out of unwarranted trouble that requires such a gift.” Roman was alluding to the scandal and cocked his head. There was nothing else to say about it, and he left it be. Truth be told, Roman had questions for the boss. But none of them were relevant to their current situation and most bordered on rude. “How is Caroline, then?” Despite their bitter rivalries, Roman had sent flowers to her on the news that her husband had passed. Roman grew up from nothing, and while he was business first, there was always a sense of ‘may the best man win’ and when one of them passed, there was a level of respect to be paid. 

Two mob bosses walk into an antique shop; sounded like the start of a bad joke. Roman was competition. The feud didn’t run nearly as deep as it did with the Rosses, a generational rivalry soaked in history and blood. The Navarro Clan, however, was new to the scene. Coming up, quickly, though, which made Roman a threat. He was a smart man, respectful, too. Adrian wouldn’t lie and say he wasn’t impressed with Roman’s condolences towards his mother. Caroline reveled in reading notes about her dearly departed husband, even if the words came from the hand of a rival. “She’s well,” Adrian replied. “Relatively speaking.” He could still hear his mother’s sobs late in the night but she put on a brave face in daylight. “All her focus is on the Solano Foundation at the moment. Working towards an ALS charity fundraiser.”

“And your family?” he asked. “That nephew of yours growing up well?”

[adriansolano]

If asked, Lila wouldn’t know how to explain her impulsive reaction from moments ago. On one hand, she told herself she didn’t care and that Adrian had a point– ever since Sylvie had moved out, the halls had been empty, eerily so. On the other. Selling their family home! The thought alone seemed absurd, something about it set off all alarms in her head. Lila was conflicted yes, but didn’t mean she was happy about it. “You’d need a miracle-worker, not a realtor.” Lila could argue with Adrian for days but it would do her no good since she doubted her brother was interest in having a sincere conversation. “Winters in Italy are harsh. Or well– at least would be for mother. We should wait.” Instead of letting her emotions get the best of her again, she reasoned but at the same time her reasoning wouldn’t rid Mother of her dream and it would postpone selling the family home for a few months. “Yeah, well, you’re the man of the house now. What do you want to do? I’m not going on my skiing trip this year, might as well help you execute your plan.”

While Adrian was happy to move on from the touchy subject of selling the house, Christmas wasn’t an easier topic of conversation. Not with his family falling apart. Would he get to see his daughter wake up on Christmas morning? See the joy on her face as she unwraps her gifts? He doubted it. “You know our mother. She’ll want all her children under one roof. The twins, too.” Caroline also wanted Lissa and Sylvia but Adrian doubted his ex-wife would feel the same. Holidays were a family affair. Especially for the Solanos, a family drenched in tradition. Though, he had a hunch this year would be far from jolly. “Gotta talk to Lissa ‘bout details. Don’t know what she plans on doing.”

[adriansolano]

location: literally any antique furniture shop

open starter.

It was to be expected that the city was on edge - even months after the deed was done. Roman liked to go against the grain, the path less travelled was where all the opportunity laid. Any Tom, Dick, and Harry could be consumed with the whispers on the streets but that shit would kill you quicker than a bullet. His fingers thumbed a price tag on a particular lamp. He might have no need to worry about money (ever) but one didn’t get rich by blowing all their money on stupid shit. It was a Tiffany lamp, circa the 40s. Taking out his phone, he snapped a photo. It was a lovely piece but he wasn’t quite sold on it. There was room for a new bar cart in his office that he needed to prioritize. “That lamp is truly a diamond in the rough. I’d recommend it, if you’re going to get anything.”

Adrian was browsing, in need of a Christmas present for his mother. One that said “I’m sorry for fucking your assistant and ruining my marriage” without so many words. Running into Roman Navarro was a coincidence; Adrian hated coincidence. Given his complete lack of knowledge on the subject of antiquities, he had to take the man at his word. It did look like something Caroline would enjoy. “You should consider a career change. Antique sales seems to be your strong suit.” Adrian waved over a sales associate. “Wrap this up for me, please? Leave it up front, gimme a chance to catch up with my colleague here,” he said, crossing his arms over his chest. “Hobby of yours?”

[adriansolano]

Elsie’s head tilted to the side, taking in the subtle movement of his lips and the spark of lust settling in his eyes, bringing some life into the man’s otherwise dead gaze. That was enough for now — being an object of lust, someone to warm his bed. In a sultry club full of half-naked bodies, with the bitterness off whiskey on both of their tongues, it was the best she could do. But she wasn’t blind or deaf to the fact that she’d have to get him talking, if she ever wanted Adrian to see her as anything more than a great body and a pretty face. She had the brain and the wits and the consistency to put up with his shit, to hold his hand and rub his back and listen to him drone on about his dead dad. Elsie was a full package, and sooner or later he’d see that too. 

Her hand moved from his shoulder to the side of his neck, her fingertips brushing softly against the lobe of his ear before starting a teasing trail down his jugular. “It’s about to get much harder if I’ve got anything to do with it,” she smirked, teeth digging into her bottom lip, her gaze dropping to his lap before meeting his again. “So how about we take that bottle to go?” It was about time tabloids got another photo of them leaving, in case Lissa was softening up and thinking of taking him back. 

Adrian lifted his chin slightly under Elsie’s touch, barely listening to the words that left her lips. His mind wandered to her bed and as if she read his mind, she suggested they take the bottle to go. Adrian nodded, a smirk on his mouth as his hand grabbed the side of her face and pulled her close for a quick rough kiss. “Let’s go,” he said, standing, offering Elsie his hand. Since the separation, Adrian hadn’t bothered hiding his affair from the crowds. Lissa knew; didn’t matter if anyone else knew, too. Besides, any of his people give him lip for his adulterous behavior, they’d probably get a bullet to the brain.

Before walking out of Il Salone, Adrian made a quick stop at the bar, leaning over to grab a bottle from behind. The bartender wished him a pleasant evening. 

“We can take my car,” he said to his mistress, despite the alcohol pumping through his veins. Adrian was no stranger to drunk driving, at least these past few months. Reckless, he knew, but he didn’t care. Hadn’t cared since Luis. So, he weaved through LA streets, speeding to Elsie’s place, unbothered by the honking protests of others criticizing his driving as he passed.  

[adriansolano]

Lila remained silent, Adrian’s words tugged at her heartstrings but at the same time, her frown deepened. God, how complicated it all was. Caroline needed her daughter, Lila needed her brother– and not the detached robot with a drinking problem– it was a cruel world indeed as it seemed to Lila neither of them would get what they needed anytime soon. “What should we do for Christ–” there she went, giving a normal topic a try when Adrian spoke again and her stomach dropped. “You’re fucking kidding, right?!”

Adrian couldn’t win. First his sister insists the house doesn’t feel like a home, a sentiment with which he agreed, to getting pissed at the very mention of putting it on the market. “It’s not like I got a realtor,” he said, trying to calm Lillian down. “Besides, need to get ‘ma her dream villa in Verona before she’d let the house go.” Adrian shrugged. “It’s a lot of empty halls, is all. Wasted space.” He shook his head and waved his hand, pushing off the thought. “You wanted to talk Christmas?”

[adriansolano]

Lila’s gaze followed his, even though the younger sibling could already tell by his cocky tone how it all ended. “I think– you’re not a young man anymore,” and she gave him a meaningful look with a hint of teasing in her tone. Adrian couldn’t afford to act so reckless anymore, he should leave the dirty work to the soldiers. It was devastating enough they had lost dad, without Adrian the Solano family would all fall apart, completely. Especially Caroline. The process which had begun with Luis’ death would be completed. The problem was, Adrian understood none of it as he was too busy wallowing in self-pity. Lila reveled in the burning sensation finest whiskey provided– as his comment provoked an identically bitter feeling. “I hear Elsie Hartford is there to keep her company all the time.” Offense was the best defense. Or maybe she didn’t know what else to say. After the stinging remark, she averted her gaze and frowned, downing her drink. “I don’t know what to tell you, Adrian. I came by last week. It just doesn’t…” Feel the same.

Adrian couldn’t help but tense at his sister’s mention of Elsie. Though, he couldn’t blame her, either. On a rational level, of course, Adrian knew he was the problem. His issue, however, was that his irrational side took over since the death of his father. “She needs her daughter not her assistant,” he replied, tone harsher than it should’ve been. Adrian sighed. “There’s no goin’ back to normal. That’s damn sure.” He paused. “Been thinkin’ of selling the place. Start fresh somewhere new.” Though, there was something blasphemous in putting the home that’s been in the family for generations on the market. Too many ghosts in the halls and skeletons in the closets.

[adriansolano]

At Adrian’s eye-roll, Lila flashed a smile at him. He should be thanking her and deep down he probably was. After all she did save her brother the unpleasant business of saying goodbye at the end of the evening or whenever he’d get bored. Complimenting her looks he only stated the obvious, really. Which was comforting in a way– at least he hadn’t completely lost touch with reality. As Lila slid into the booth next to him, she heaved a sigh, knowing she wouldn’t leave him anytime soon, even if the thought of finding her party friends or making new ones did seem appealing. The sigh went unnoticed as loud music drowned it almost immediately. One blonde mirrored the other, bringing the glass to her lips, staring straight ahead at the roaring crowd until Adrian broke the excruciating silence. “What do you think?” Lila answered with a rhetorical question but a victorious smirk took over soon, speaking for itself. The younger sibling turned her head to him, sipping on the amber liquid. “Yours?”

Adrian leaned back in the booth. He knew his sister’s meeting went well, able to eye the client at the other end of the lounge indulging in all the vices Il Salone had to offer. Adrian’s meeting, however, ended in a back alley. He looked at his hands, knuckles washed clean from the message he sent. He smirked before he replied, “what do you think?”

Downing his drink, he motioned to one of the servers for another round. “Ma’s been missing you ‘round the house,” Adrian stated, not trying to guilt his sister one way or another. He was just tired of his mother constantly nagging him about the silence throughout the house since his separation from Lissa. 

[lissamockblog]

ADRIAN & LISSA; link in source

(01) she will always hate me - james blunt

i never meant to hurt you, it’s just something i do. i  guess it’s not a good excuse. and she will always hate me, no matter what I say. and there is no mistaking, the love is gone.

(02) $ting - the neighbourhood

you say that you love me, but you act like you don’t. you used to adore me, laughed at all my jokes. don’t take this the wrong way, you put me in harm’s way. when we had our first kiss, it was your favorite thing and you weren’t lying when you said it would sting. don’t take this the wrong way, you put me in harm’s way.

(03) nothing inside - machine gun kelly

it’s been a long time since i was young and she was the first face I was looking to call mine. she said it’s alright, had a couple of drinks and i got issues we can fight about all night. i did this all for you, look what i turned into. she looked dead into my eyes and she saw nothing inside.

(04) before you go - lewis capaldi

i fell by the wayside like everyone else. i hate you, i hate you, i hate you, but i was just kidding myself. our every moment, i start to replace ‘cause now that they’re gone, all i hear are the words that i needed to say. when you hurt under the surface, like troubled water running cold. well, time can heal, but this won’t. so, before you go, was there something I could’ve said to make your heart beat better?

(05) dreams - gabrielle aplin & bastille

like a heartbeat drives you mad, in the stillness of remembering what you had and what you lost. and what you had and what you lost. thunder only happens when it’s rainin’. players only love you when they’re playin’. say women, they will come and they will go, when the rain washes you clean, you’ll know. you’ll know.

(06) gravity - sara bareilles

oh, you loved me ‘cause i’m fragile, when I thought that I was strong. but you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone. set me free, leave me be. i don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity. here i am, and i stand so tall, just the way i’m supposed to be but you’re on to me and all over me.

(07) bang bang (my baby shot me down) - 2cellos & sky ferreira

bang bang, he shot me down. bang bang, i hit the ground. bang bang, that awful sound. bang bang, my baby shot me down. seasons came and changed the time, when I grew up, I called him mine. he would always laugh and say, “remember when we used to play?”

(08) when the party’s over - billie eilish

but nothin’ is better sometimes, once we’ve both said our goodbyes. let’s just let it go, let me let you go. quiet when i’m comin’ home and i’m on my own. i could lie, say i like it like that, like it like that. i could lie, say i like it like that, like it like that.

(09) as it was - hozier

and tell me if somehow some of it remained, how long you would wait for me? how long i’ve been away? the shape that i’m in now is shaping the doorway, make your good love known to me. just tell me about your day. just as it was, baby, before the otherness came. and I knew its name, the drugs, the dark, the light, the shame.

(10) are you with me? - nilu

'cause i’m starting to think that i never actually had you. you’re not in the dark, but far from the light. and I need to know now, are you with me? are you in or are you out? are you with me? are you drifting through the doubt?

(11) so cold - ben cocks

oh, you can’t hear me cry, see my dreams all die, from where you’re standing, on your own. it’s so quiet here, and i feel so cold. this house no longer, feels like home. you caused my heart to bleed and you still owe me a reason i can’t figure out why. why i’m alone and freezing while you’re in the bed that she’s in i’m just left alone to cry?

(12) half a man - dean lewis

i was wrong to say i loved her, i was wrong to think I’m right. but when i told her it was over, my darling i had lied. i’ve been running from my demons, afraid to look behind. i’ve been running from myself, afraid of what I’d find. but how am I supposed to love you, when i don’t love who i am? and how can i give you all of me when i’m only half a man?

(13) hurricane - tommee profitt

i can feel your heart hanging in the air, i’m counting every step as you climb the stairs. it’s buried in your bones, i see it in your closed eyes. turning in, this is harder than we know. we hold it in the most when we’re wearing thin. coming like a hurricane, i take it in real slow. the world is spinning like a weathervane, fragile and composed. though i am breaking down again i am aching now to let you in.

(14) exile - taylor swift & bon iver

i think I’ve seen this film before and I didn’t like the ending. i’m not your problem anymore, so who am I offending now? you were my crown, now I’m in exile seein’ you out. i think I’ve seen this film before so I’m leavin’ out the side door.

(15) unfucktheworld - angel olsen

i quit my dreaming the moment that i found you, i started dancing just to be around you. here’s to thinking that it all meant so much more. i kept my mouth shut and opened up the door. i wanted nothing but for this to be the end. for this to never be a tied and empty hand. if all the trouble in my heart would only mend, i lost my dream, i lost my reason all again. it’s not just me for you, i have to look out too. i have to save my life, i need some peace of mind.

[lilacsolano]

TAOD incorrect quotes [1/∞]:

ft. Adrian Solano { @adriansolano }

[adriansolano]

In a VIP section reserved specially for the Solano daughter, Lila concluded the business portion of the evening. The man declared his undying loyalty to her family and pleased with herself and her remarkable negotiation skills, Lila eagerly left him there to enjoy the benefits of being a Solano associate, making her way down to the bar where her drink of choice was awaiting her. Thanking the bartender with one of her most charming smiles, the blonde hoped to down her drink and finally catch a break– away from her family, away from the family business. … Well, the universe had other plans as the all-too familiar brooding figure on the other side of the club caught her eye. Lila cursed under breath, hating that she had to spot him, that she couldn’t just ignore him. Beside him, she found young woman desperate to be in Adrian Solano’s company, or at least be seen with him– rumor has it he was back on the market. “Leave us,” Lila ordered, casting a single glance at the girl. “Trust me sweetheart, it’s for the best.” The younger sibling turned to face her brother, a smirk climbing onto her lips. “His misery might rub off on you and we wouldn’t want that now, would we.” The poor girl had no other choice but to do as told, really, so a moment later, Lila joined her brother in his booth. “Hello big brother– you look awful.” However, she slid over the crystal glass of his poison of choice– after all, the only way to bond with Adrian nowadays was through alcohol.

Adrian was mid-conversation, when Lillian interrupted the exchange. His youngest sibling and only sister knew how to easily get her way; she shooed away the woman who broke his seclusion as if it was in her favor. He couldn’t help but roll his eyes. Though, truthfully, Lila would ultimately prove to be better company by the end of the evening. 

“Hello, little sister,” Adrian replied. “You look ravishing, as always.”

He picked up the tumbler she pushed his way and brought the glass to his lips. The familiar burn of alcohol always welcome. “How was your meeting?” he asked, keeping the conversation surface-level. Talking business was easy, even if he knew it’d bore the hell out Lillian. Adrian hid from everyone; especially family.

[adriansolano]

Elsie’s was not an unknown face in Il Salone, recognition flashing over the features of the club’s patrons and personnel alike, whether it was in a contemptuous curl of a lip or something more akin to a respectful nod. Ever since she’d leaked her affair with Adrian, she’d ceased to be the help, and become the king’s mistress instead — not her end-goal and certainly not a well-reputed position, but Elsie had never cared for the opinions of the lambs. If warming Adrian’s bed got her top-shelf whiskey and the bartender’s discreet nod towards his boss’s whereabouts, she could only imagine the perks wearing his ring and name would come with. 

Stopping at his booth, Elsie smiled, the curve of her lips tensing just a little at the complete lack of emotion in Adrian’s tone and features. A shame, considering that the man was handsome as hell and could be as charming as the devil, if only he put in a little effort. It didn’t mean she couldn’t handle ‘the grieving son’, it’s just that she ended up having a much better time when he toned it down a little. 

“So am I,” she cooed, making sure he’d get a good look at the length of her legs and tightness of her skirt before sliding into the booth with him. Sure enough — she was off the clock and ready to get on something, or someone else. “And it looks like we’ve got something else in common,” she pointed out, taking a sip of her drink before touching it down close to his, her hand finding its way up his sleeve onto his shoulder instead. “You look a little tense though.” Tilting her head, she pressed her fingers down on his taut muscles, trying to massage them into submission. “Hard day?” 

Elsie’s company was a welcome distraction. Before the mess with his father, Adrian never really gave the woman a second thought. Though, after he pulled the trigger and watched the life leave Luis’ body, everything changed. His relationship with Lissa strained. His fault. Adrian couldn’t bring himself to sleep next to her at night. His hands on her body felt like a wolf hunting his prey. He wanted to, no, needed to push her away. In his head, it was a sick way of keeping her safe from himself, no matter how much it hurt her at first, even if he refuses to fully let go.

Elsie served her purpose well; she was Adrian’s worst qualities personified. She felt no shame and radiated determination. Cut-throat and seductive. Her fingers teased the fabric of his shirt and pressed into his skin to sooth tense muscles. Adrian eyed Elsie, a subtle smirk forming on his lips in the presence of his mistress, thoughts of his grief and self-inflicted loneliness shuffling to the back of his brain, unashamed of the public display of adultery. “No harder than usual,” he responded, though a brief phone call with his daughter did leave him heartbroken. Sylvie was confused, rightfully so, and Adrian didn’t have the answers. Though, his daughter wasn’t a conversation he’d have with Elsie; both Lissa and Sylvia were topics off limits.

“We can get a bottle if you want,” Adrian suggested. Though, taking her in, legs, hair, lips, hands, he knew he wouldn’t want to stay long. 

[adriansolano]

Adrian sat in a secluded booth near the stage of Il Salone. The neon lights illumined the otherwise dim room, allowing patrons to escape in their own world of sin and debauchery. Adrian was killing time, unwilling to go to his large, near empty estate. After Lissa left and the death of his father, even with his mother roaming the halls, Adrian’s house was not a home. So, he sat, watching the dancers, nursing an expensive glass of rye.

“I’m off the clock,” he said, raising his glass to the person who approached. “Feel free to join.” His tone was flat, emotionless and cool. Adrian failed to hide his apathy. He didn’t see a point in pretending anymore.

[japril]