Livvy Absolut

I think I wanted to impress ya'll and now I just want to reblog everything

[bob-belcher]

[endmyreign]

[ungarmax]

me, dumping a load of freshly washed but unfolded laundry on my bed: boy i’m sure gonna be pissed about this when i want to go to bed

[accelerationist-king-piccolo]

[autumngracy]

WHAT a goddamn mood

[pusheen]

[aspergersissues]

[cephalotodd-deactivated20190310]

we should make fun of americans more. why dont their shops include tax in the price tag. like how much does this item cost? its a surprise :)

[moomoobooboo-deactivated2020102]

Honestly, tea. I’ve lived here my whole life and I have never once known what my total is gonna be at the register. Total fucking mystery.

[2-face]

im an ex-american living in new zealand for the past two years and it still never fails to blow my mind that i can take a $2 coin, walk up to a counter with two $1 items, and perform the expected transaction

[greekedtext]

this callout is completely deserved

[musterniillustrates]

MY GOAL NOW IS TO MAKE AS MUCH HEINOUS BULLSHIT AS I CAN POSSIBLY MUSTER IN A SINGLE SCREAMING LIFETIME

[damianimated]

At Target this lady told her son he couldn’t have a Wonder Woman doll because “that’s for girls” and then bought her daughter the same one. It got me thinking about how often I see people bar young boys from appreciating girls/women as protagonists and heroes, and my own experience with it as a kid.

[musterniillustrates]

i worked at a giftshop that sold replica swords from t.v. and film once and my most vivid memory of it is the guy who would come in once a month FIRST THING IN THE MORNING wearing sunglasses regardless of the time of year and would spend an hour talking to me about how he practiced with his swords in his backyard

and then he wanted to go over all the gemstones in the shop and talk about their reiki properties

sometimes he’d buy a sword and i’d make all my sales for the day right there and then

wonder how he’s doin

[musterniillustrates]

casually remembering more about sword guy he told me he was a time traveller

[musterniillustrates]

this is the same job where we sold 15 swords to a couple for a furry wedding

[musterniillustrates]

the more time i spend away from this job the more convinced i am that i hallucinated more than half of it but i have coworkers that can corroborate my stories and that’s…… a lot

we sold these tiny frogs (“african dwarf frogs”?) in these ittybitty environments (which were obviously inappropriate and probably terrible for them) and about an hour of my day was devoted to checking all the tiny tanks for any grey froggies that went belly-up, we had 1 case of what i’m pretty sure was attempted froggy cannibalism followed by death, and one time our entire shipment of frogs just showed up dead and it was p tragic

we also sold man-candles, wine glasses, hot sauce, potpurri, dragon statues, sexy fairy statues, and salt lamps. 5 of the folks that regularly came in for gemstones told us our shop was haunted but i believe em about as far as i can throw em so you know what

y’know

what

[ignigeno]

The chimera I designed for our new LEGO show. I cannot express how much of a labor of love this was. It took over 100 hours just to design, let alone build and is one of the largest and most complex sculptures I’ve done.

Fun fact: This model used every single LEGO color available in standard brick.

[sphinxofgrease]

hi is anyone here good at photoshop and can make a version of leonardo da vincis st john the baptist where hes flipping the bird

[sphinxofgrease]

this is incredibly important

[officecyborg]

how’s this?

[sphinxofgrease]

god bless

[mahoganydesk]

Why was this important?  Like, I love the photoshop, but why?

[sphinxofgrease]

1. i needed a reaction image for a very specific hypothetical situation that will never happen

2. its what leonardo would have wanted

[thealpacalypse-archive]

sure i guess sex is okay but have you ever closed a dozen tabs after finishing an academic paper

[musterniillustrates]

hi i kind of veered into possessed by the devil territory for a couple of months there i’m sorry but i’m back

[musterniillustrates]

i retract this statement the devil is persistent and i was a fool for thinking i could thwart him

[gif87a-com]

[thebibliosphere]

#Reminds me of a bird of paradise

[aliensnipe]

What if there were women’s cleanliness products that were marketed the way Old Spice stuff is? Like they had names like “Lioness” and “Sycamore” and “Wildfire” and “Hunter’s Moon” and they were touted as making you smell like a warrior queen who does not suffer fools and conquers all she beholds

[trixie-ren-deactivated20191028]

HELLO LADIES

have you felt the primal call of the unmerciful sea calling you to strike down those who would defy you? no? well if you stopped using overpriced flower-scented body wash and switched to SEA HAG, you might. 

look down.

back up. where are you? you’re a siren, bare-breasted and shrieking as you lure the unwary to their doom on the rocks below. and you smell amazing. 

what’s in your hand? back at me. it’s a vial of skin-nourishing ingredients, derived from the seaweed you used to strangle a hated foe. it does wonders for your skin tone and resilience, and we all can agree that we will need that resilience in the coming war.

look again: the seaweed is now a formal apology from the last man who unnecessarily tried to explain something to you.

anything is possible when you smell like a vengeful sea witch and embrace your own rage. i’m on a narwhal. 

[dekoi2501post]

[dangerbooze]

OH MY GOD

[zionthepansexual]

[2dshepard]

Lol I love Peter!

[babyanimalgifs]

I think I know how to raise my own puppies if you don’t mind, becky.